Whatever Is Excellent with Leanne Tuggle
Encouragement and Inspiration for women choosing to rise above the “just survive” mentality and instead set their mind on thriving in all that they say and do. The ultimate goal is to equip you to pursue whatever is excellent in the midst of your ordinary life and in all that you say and do.
Whatever Is Excellent with Leanne Tuggle
07: Transformative Self-Care Through Faith
Can self-care cross the line into self-centeredness?
Discover how to master the fine balance between taking care of yourself and serving others in our latest episode. We'll unpack the familiar advice to "put on your oxygen mask first," especially for women and mothers who often juggle multiple caregiving roles. Through the lens of Matthew 22:36-39, we dive deep into the inherent nature of self-love and how it should never overshadow our greater command to love others. You'll also hear practical wisdom on how to ensure that your self-care practices enhance rather than hinder your ability to serve those around you.
Experience a transformative approach to daily excellence by prioritizing your relationship with God. Learn how starting your day with spiritual grounding can make you a more patient parent, a more confident professional, and a more dedicated student. With insights from Philippians 2:3-4 and 2 Corinthians 12:9, we emphasize that true strength and the ability to serve come from relying on Jesus. Tune in to understand how God's grace can empower you through your weaknesses, enabling you to show up with unparalleled excellence in every aspect of your life. This episode is a must-listen for those striving to harmoniously blend self-care and selfless service.
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you've likely heard this phrase before put on your oxygen mask first before helping anyone else. And if you are on a plane, yes, please put on your oxygen mask first. It's really hard to help someone if you're already passed out, right? But this same phrase is used to justify and explain the need for self-care, especially for mothers, but really for all women. Women are typically the primary caregivers in the home. Women are uniquely designed to be nurturing and caring, and these are wonderful, good and lovely attributes. Good and lovely attributes.
Leanne:Caring for your home and raising your babies are also very demanding and all-consuming, so it isn't any wonder that you feel exhausted and depleted and in need of some self-care by the end of the day, and just like most of what we talk about here, there are two very different ways of handling this. One way considers self-care as your. I deserve this because and then fill in the blank with whatever you're feeling in that moment it's the idea that you can fix yourself with just the right ingredients and then get back to doing all the things for everyone else. Now to be clear, self-care in and of itself is not a bad thing. In fact, I am a huge advocate for getting ready in the morning, like making your bed, washing your face and putting on clothes that help you look and feel your best. And putting on clothes that help you look and feel your best. Over on Instagram, where I like to hang out, I encourage women nearly every day to get ready as a way of showing up with excellence, so you are open to the opportunities to love and serve your people well all day long, and getting ready is arguably a classic self-care posture. You are taking care of yourself first before caring for your loves. However and you knew that was coming, didn't you there is a difference between prioritizing self-care and idolizing self-care, and it all comes down to what is happening in your heart.
Leanne:One of the most quoted verses in the Bible to back up the need for self-care is found in Matthew 22, verses 36 through 39. One of the experts in the law asked Jesus what is the greatest commandment, and Jesus replied by saying this love the Lord, your God, with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And then he said the second is like it Love your neighbor as yourself. Here you find Jesus telling the people to love your neighbor as yourself. Some might say that this sounds like a justification for taking care of yourself, because you can't love your neighbor if you don't love or care for yourself. It sounds kind of like that oxygen mask first analogy, doesn't it? And yet I don't think Jesus is telling you to love yourself. In this passage, in fact, loving yourself is implied. It is actually your default setting to love yourself.
Leanne:We are inherently selfish and often more focused on what's in it for me than we care to admit. Recently my daughter was telling me about an interaction she had with some friends from school and she was very concerned about what they might say or think about her in regards to this specific situation. Basically, she was very concerned about what they might say or think about her in regards to this specific situation. Basically, she was overthinking her conversations and interactions, like we pretty much all do, right ladies. Well, looking her right in the eyes, I told her Sweetheart, the truth is, no one cares about you as much as you do. They are all so focused on themselves to really pay too much attention to you. I know that probably sounds super harsh, but, with all gentleness, it is the honest truth.
Leanne:I mean, think about a time in your life where you were talking to someone and then you said something you shouldn't have said and you immediately regretted it. You're like, oh man, I shouldn't have said that. And then you know the conversation ends. You go about your day, but you keep thinking about that one conversation and that one interaction and it just is driving you crazy to the point where you can't stand it anymore. And so you finally go to that person and you apologize I am so sorry, I shouldn't have said that. And they look at you like I have no idea what you're talking about, because, while you have been thinking about it all day long in terms of how it is affecting you, that person is focused on themselves and the things that they've got going on, and they have completely forgotten this conversation and have no memory of it whatsoever. That's the same thing that happens all the time. People are so focused on their own things they're not thinking about you, and that's what I was trying to communicate to her. That's that inherent selfishness where we are so focused on ourselves most of the time.
Leanne:So if Jesus is not telling us to love ourselves, what is he saying? I believe he is telling us to treat others as well as we treat ourselves, since selfishness is our default. This is a challenge to put the needs of others before ourselves. This is a challenge to put the needs of others before ourselves. Philippians 2, 3 and 4 sums it up perfectly Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, consider others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. So, as women of excellence, we are not to be so concerned with ourselves, but to put the interests of others before ourselves. Chances are, you probably feel like you are doing this already, especially if you are a mom of littles who demand so much of you right now.
Leanne:How do you balance caring for yourself while also dying to self daily to care for your loves? How does that work? The answer lies in the earlier part of what Jesus's response to the experts was. He said that the first commandment is to love the Lord, your God, with all your heart and soul and mind. Our first focus is loving God. The only way we are able to love others is because of the deep and unconditional love of God. 1 John 4.19 says we love because he first loved us. Your soul craves a relationship with God. His abiding love for us in Christ is what empowers you to love and serve others. It's his love that strengthens you to show up every day with excellence when you prioritize loving God wholly and completely. Your self-care is a byproduct of this sanctifying process of pursuing God.
Leanne:Okay, so what does that look like in real life? It looks like a woman who knows that she will be a more patient and loving mother if she starts her day in the word before her children wake up. It looks like a woman who prays before her business presentation and then puts on her red lipstick to confidently convey what's in it for them. It looks like a woman who politely declines an invitation to go out and instead washes her face, goes to bed early so she can effectively show up for her college final and do her very best.
Leanne:I encourage women to get ready every day so that they can confidently lay their self to the side and faithfully love and serve their people well, and getting ready depends on prioritizing what God has planned for you today. Essentially, you are getting ready to serve because yourself is already taken care of, and getting ready with the purpose of being able to more effectively serve and love others comes from knowing who you are in Christ and understanding that your capacity to love comes from him alone. It's the heart. For you today, self-care isn't a bad thing. You should absolutely take care of yourself so that you can better love and serve the people on your path today, and the best way to care for yourself is to prioritize your relationship with God, not to Jesus and a cup of coffee, or Jesus and a bubble bath. Jesus is all that you need in order to show up with excellence today. Period. Getting ready puts you in a posture of openness to what he has planned for you.
Leanne:As this episode wraps up, I want to leave you with one last encouragement from 2 Corinthians 12, 9. But he said to me my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. We cannot fully care for ourselves without the steadfast love and grace of Jesus, for ourselves without the steadfast love and grace of Jesus, and it is because of His grace that we are able to love and serve others well, even when we don't feel like it, even when we feel like our cup is empty. It is only through Jesus that we have the strength to do what he has called us to do today. Self-care isn't a bad thing, and fully relying on God for the strength you need is the best thing that you can do to show up with excellence every day.