68: Raising Grateful Kids (Parenting Pointers Part 1) Artwork

Whatever Is Excellent with Leanne Tuggle

Encouragement and Inspiration for women choosing to rise above the “just survive” mentality and instead set their mind on thriving in all that they say and do. The ultimate goal is to equip you to pursue whatever is excellent in the midst of your ordinary life and in all that you say and do.

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Whatever Is Excellent with Leanne Tuggle

68: Raising Grateful Kids (Parenting Pointers Part 1)

February 24, 2026 • Leanne • Season 5 • Episode 68

0:00 | 19:41

Happiness is loud, but gratitude is lasting. We open our Parenting Pointers series with a candid, hope-filled guide to raising grateful kids in a world that tells them more is never enough. Instead of bending our homes around constant comfort, we walk through how Scripture reframes the goal: train the heart, not chase the mood.

We share where entitlement slips in—often through our own habits—and how to course-correct with simple, sustainable rhythms. From keeping a family gratitude journal to weaving short prayers of thanks into ordinary moments, we model what we want our children to learn. We dig into Hebrews 12 to show why loving discipline forms peaceful fruit, and we use Deuteronomy 6 as our blueprint for everyday discipleship at the table, in the car, and during bedtime routines.

Perspective is a powerful teacher, so we talk about widening kids’ view beyond peer comparisons and into global realities. Serving together, filling a Christmas shoebox, or partnering with local ministries helps shift the story from “I want” to “I can give.” We outline practical steps: distinguishing needs from wants, setting family budgets with values in mind, assigning age-appropriate chores, letting natural consequences teach, and celebrating small acts of stewardship. Along the way, we anchor the heart in Scripture and close with the story of the one leper who returned to say thank you—an image of the kind of children we hope to raise.

If this conversation encourages you, share it with a friend who’s navigating the same tensions. Subscribe for the next parts of the series, leave a review to help others find the show, and tell us one practice you’ll try this week to grow gratitude at home.

Series Launch And Focus On Gratitude

Happiness Culture Vs Biblical Parenting

Discipline, Obedience, And Righteous Fruit

Entitlement In The Home And Culture

Modeling Gratitude Starts With Parents

Remembering God’s Gifts And Faithfulness

Seeing Global Need To Shape Perspective

Teach Diligently In Everyday Moments

Practical Steps For Cultivating Gratitude

Closing Reflection On Luke 17

Leanne Tuggle 0:50

Friends, I am particularly excited about this episode today because it is the first part in a series that I will be doing on Whatever is Excellent. I haven't recorded a series on this show yet, but this was inspired by some recent conversations and interactions that I've had with other like-minded women who are doing their best to raise children who love the Lord and want to serve him. And so for the next handful of weeks, I will be sharing this series on parenting. I'm calling it Parenting Pointers because it is my hope that everything you hear in these episodes points you back to the only one who can truly lead us on this parenting adventure, and that is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. So, as a little preview, today's episode is all about raising grateful kids. And then next week, we will dive into raising respectful kids, followed by an episode on raising independent kids. And then we will wrap up this mini-series with a guest speaker on the topic of raising godly kids. I cannot wait to dig into these topics with you and together find out what God's word says about raising children who ultimately love the Lord with all their hearts, with all their souls, and with all their minds. So let's take a look at raising grateful kids. They don't know how good they have it. This is a phrase that my husband and I find ourselves repeating fairly regularly, and it seemed like the best way to begin this conversation about gratitude and our children. And that, my friends, is our fault. As parents, we are responsible for helping our children to understand what it means to be grateful and content. And I really think that the entitlement that we see in our world today is the fault of parents who have failed their children. Parents today are more concerned with the happiness of their children. And now our kids are paying the price. Thankfully, there is hope. Becoming aware of the entitlement that may be in your home, owning our mistakes and our failures is necessary in order to embark on a course correction that leads to more gratitude and thankful hearts. You see, raising grateful kids needs to start with us. Ask any parent what they want most for their kids, and you'll likely hear some version of, I just want them to be happy. This sounds really good, and I think most people would nod their heads in agreement. Yes, we all want that. The problem, however, is that you are not responsible for your child's happiness. You are responsible to love your children. But nowhere in God's word does he tell us to make sure our children are happy. In fact, Hebrews 12, 11 says, for the moment, all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. The most loving thing that we can do as parents is to teach our children to obey God. And the best way we can do that is through training, through discipline. It's impossible to discipline your children and keep them happy. Nobody likes to be disciplined. Nobody likes to be corrected or rebuked, right? So in order to teach our children what it means to obey God, we're going to have to make them a little unhappy. So our goal is not their happiness. Happiness, however, has become the ultimate goal in our world today, to the point of obsession. I know women who have left their husbands and families in pursuit of what makes them happy. I know others who are dealing with mountains of debt as a result of relying on material possessions to make them happy. And I think possibly the most disheartening example is seeing homes completely rearranged to become child-centered in an effort to keep their children happy. Psychiatrist and author Dan Kidlawn says we give our kids too much and demand too little of them. If that doesn't give you a moment of pause, right? I don't know about you, but I'm not interested in raising entitled kids. But that is the dangerous road on which we tread if we are more concerned with their happiness and not taking into consideration that loving our children well occasionally means upsetting them. Kristen Welch in her book, Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World, says, we live in a culture that is obsessed with the right to have what we want, whether we've earned it or not. And when it comes to raising kids, I am realizing that teaching them gratitude is more important now than ever before. A couple of years ago, my daughter and I were reading Little House in the Big Woods together, and we were both struck by how genuinely grateful Mary and Laura were for the gifts that they found in their stockings on Christmas morning. An orange, a peppermint candy, and like a little corn husk doll. I remember my daughter looked at me with wide eyes and said, That's all they got? But they were so happy. We both glanced over at the presents under our own tree at the time, and I could tell that the wheels were turning in her head. That Christmas was the first year she expressed genuine gratitude for her gifts without any prompting. I think that the simple lesson from that book had taken root in her heart and in my own. The first step towards raising grateful kids is to be more grateful ourselves. Again, we only have ourselves to blame if we notice entitlement taking over in our homes. So let this be your own personal heart check. Become aware of your own grumbling and complaining. Do you tend to share your discontent more than you voice your gratitude? Gratitude doesn't come naturally to any of us, it is something that must be formed in our hearts. And I think that the best way to begin this formation process is to recognize what James 1.17 says. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above. Anytime I hear grumbling and complaining, I always think about the Israelites fleeing from Egypt through the desert on their way to the Promised Land. My kids and I have read this story numerous times, and we always get so frustrated with these Israelites. Like God just pulled them out of slavery, and now they're talking about how they would rather go back to Egypt because at least there was meat there. Like, did they forget about all of the whipping and the making all the bricks? And did they like it? That's what was there in Egypt. And that's what they want to go back to. Like, what? Are you crazy? But then very quickly, I remind my children and myself how easy it is for us to forget too. When we forget or when we fail to remember God's good gifts, we fall right into the temptation to grumble and complain too. And this is why I think it is so important to keep a journal of remembrance, or what I like to call it is evidence of God's faithfulness. And it's just a notebook where we list the different things that God has been doing for us. So that when we find ourselves forgetting, we can flip through the pages of our notebook and be reminded of all that we do have to be grateful for. Psalm 103, 2 says, Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits. Let's make a habit of not just counting, but truly remembering our blessings. Gratitude is a spiritual discipline that needs to be cultivated in our hearts and in the hearts of our children. Even the most loving and generous homes can struggle with entitlement. Ask me how I know that. Children don't become more grateful by being given more, but by learning to see that not everyone lives like we do. And it's our job as parents to teach our children to be good stewards of what they have been given and not just owners of all these things. One of the recurring themes in Kristen Welch's book that I mentioned a little bit ago is to encourage your children to consider not just what they lack in comparison to others, but also all that they have. And she she puts it like this: if we are going to compare ourselves to others, let's also compare ourselves to those who live in poverty. Sometimes the best thing that we can do for our children is to make them more aware of all that they have. One of the organizations that we love to participate with every year is Operation Christmas Child, and that's put together by Samaritan's Purse. As a family, we can choose some gifts and items to put into a shoebox for a child in a third world country. And yet, the best part of this is the opportunity to talk about it with my kids. I show them pictures of these third world countries, the homes that some of these children may live in, the clothes they wear. We talk about how these gifts that we are putting into this shoebox are all that they will receive for Christmas. One day, when they get a little bit older, I would really love to be able to bring them on a mission trip so that they can see firsthand what we are talking about here. Opening their eyes to the reality of how good they have it is helpful in the formation of grateful hearts. We can't just tell them they are blessed. I think they need to see it too. They also need to hear it. Again, you and I are modeling gratitude, and that will go a long way in encouraging grateful hearts. How do you respond to lack or disappointment? Do your kids hear you complain more than they hear you give thanks? Do they see the joy of generosity or do they see it as a burden? Deuteronomy 6, 5 through 7 reminds us that you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children. You shall talk about them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise. These verses mean that everywhere you go, everything you say and everything that you do is an opportunity to show your children how to love God and love others. Things like food, shelter, love. We often give them way more than this, and that's okay. But what if we also gave our children a chance to learn what it means to work hard and earn their wants? What if we let them experience the natural consequences for not stewarding what they were given well? What if we stopped trying to keep them happy and let them instead find their joy in Christ so that they can actually give thanks in all circumstances? Like it says in 1 Thessalonians 5, 18. How can we practically move towards raising grateful kids? First, pray and ask God to reveal any of your own entitlement issues. Talk it over with your spouse, seek the Lord's forgiveness and mercy in this area. And then walk in the opposite by keeping a gratitude journal of some sort. If your kids are old enough, include them in the remembering and the writing down of all the things that you can be grateful for. Make this a regular practice. Maybe every Thursday after dinner you record things that you can be grateful for for that week. Hashtag Thankful Thursday. Just a suggestion. Next, you can also be intentional with your time and your money. Talk to your kids about the differences between wants and needs. As a family, decide that you are going to stand out from the world. And sometimes that means that you won't have the same things that everyone else has. Focus on the blessings of contentment. Share Luke 12, 15 with your kids when Jesus says, take care and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. Invite your children to be a part of the hard work it takes to keep your home running. Children as young as two or three can be given small chores to do. Let your children take ownership of a specific task or maybe even a room of the house to keep clean and be responsible for. And then don't bail them out when they inevitably fail. Let them work through the natural consequences of their actions. And lastly, I've said it many times so far, be sure to model gratitude in your own life. Show your own struggles to manage your disappointment and discontent. And then also how you then choose to lean on God to help you grow in this area. Gratitude takes time to cultivate. It begins in our own hearts and grows slowly over time. Psalm 145, 4 says, one generation shall commend your works to another and shall declare your mighty acts. Let's be that generation that lives with gratitude and consistently remembers just how good and faithful and generous our God is. A wonderful example of genuine gratitude can be found in Luke 17. I want to close this episode by reading to you this passage of scripture so that you can meditate on it throughout this week. Luke 17, 11 through 19. On the way to Jerusalem, he was passing along between Samaria and Galilee, and as he entered a village, he, Jesus, was met by ten lepers who stood at a distance and lifted up their voices, saying, Jesus, Master, have mercy on us. When he saw them, he said to them, Go and show yourselves to the priests. And as they went, they were cleansed. Then one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, praising God with a loud voice, and he fell on his feet face at Jesus' feet, giving him thanks. Then Jesus answered, Were not ten cleansed? Where are the nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this man? And he said to him, Rise and go your way. Your faith has made you well. May we be like the one who came back to say thank you, and may we raise children who do the same.