From One Mom to Another: Tips from TTC to Tweens

In this extra real and ridiculously relatable episode, Alexandria and Leesha spill their favorite no-fluff, actually-helpful tips from their parenting journeys so far—from trying to conceive to toddler chaos to tween drama. 

You'll hear honest reflections on what worked (and what totally flopped), the mindset shifts that changed everything, and practical hacks to make motherhood feel a little more human. 

Think of it as a best friend voice note you can play whenever you need to feel less alone. 

This is part one of a two-part convo, so stay tuned!

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Transcript

0:01

Hello and welcome back. Today is just a, which I guess we'll call solo episodes. We don't have any guests today. It is just Alex and I today and we're gonna be talking about random mom tips. Yeah, that's pretty much what this whole thing is gonna be about. Like from, all the way from trying to like conceive, all the way to tween because that's where our knowledge ends basically. Or at least our tried knowledge. Yeah, because obviously as probably all moms out there know, you can try something for a little bit and then it changes. And then can try that for a little bit and then it changes again. So maybe we'll give you some new perspectives on different tips today and or things you didn't know and want to try. And if you hear anything today that you're like, wait, how does that work? Send us a DM on Instagram because we would love to have a conversation about it. We would, for sure. um Okay, so we're gonna start off with, uh we kind of have this set up a little bit outlined. We have pregnancy, but I wouldn't mind if we started with trying to conceive a little bit first. uh I had my own personal fertility struggles. Leisha was kind of like, if it happens, it happens kind of situation. you, I mean, it happened pretty quick for you too. With Delilah. any problems. I mean, we weren't trying for Delilah, it just happened, so. yeah. So for me, I might have a little bit more on this and Alicia might have some like little inserts as well. So for me, we were getting married when I found out I have PCOS and possibly some other stuff. But that was kind of like a big deal because obviously this was seven, eight, like 89 years ago. What, my ninth anniversary? right before my wedding. So it was like nine and a half years ago. um I found out I had PCOS and I found out by like, I had this gigantic freaking cyst on my ovary and they were like, we might have to remove it. It was a very traumatic time. uh But ultimately we were, I found out because I got off my birth control because we were like, after the wedding, we're gonna start trying to have a baby, you know? And I know it takes some time after you've taken birth control for a long time. for your body to regulate usually. um But turned out my body was just not gonna regulate. ah So my first tip is if you are somebody who is having fertility issues past six months even I would say, you need to go talk to a doctor. Yeah. Yeah, because it took me a long time to get that PCOS diagnosis, a long time. They did everything under the sun, could possibly, including anxiety. even though I was literally like, my stomach was distended with the cyst. And they were like, it's anxiety. Because of course, we're women and that's what they always say it is. It doesn't matter if I could have my arm chopped off, it's anxiety. um But so it takes a long time. So I would say six months if you're like, things aren't happening or your periods seem off or if you're doing like ovulation strips and you're like, I never seem to be ovulating at the same time. wait, but let's stop there. If you're trying to get pregnant, ovulation strips are a huge help. I did use those with Jameson. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Learn about your cycles and learn about when you ovulate. And it's so easy. You literally can buy a huge bulk of just regular, no, you know. Yeah, and just... um and you'll start to see like a pattern of darkness. Well, it'll be light to dark and then light again and then that's when your window of ovulation should be. used a tracker. think I used, I think it was called Ovia is the one I used. And so you can track your periods, can track your ovulation, you can track like, and I did that because I was struggling with that. And I learned that with PCOS, I won't always ovulate and I was missing cycles and stuff like that. So it was really important for me to like kind of learn my pattern if we wanted to get pregnant within, you know, before five years, hopefully. it's so common for women to not know how our bodies work until you go to try to get pregnant. There's so many people that just don't know. I know. And it's not something you really learn in school. They don't talk about ovulation and stuff, because they're trying to tell you not to get pregnant, obviously. But I do think, like, you know, ovulation is important for other things, not just pregnancy, too. Like, it can really affect how your body is acting as a whole, too, you know? well and even a side step from trying to conceive, but just learning your body in that way for moms, learning how your cycle works and when you're, from when you're menstruating to in that follicular phase and then ovulation and then the lateal phase, it's so important to know how your body acts in during those times. actually become this during this time this year, I feel like it's become very more prominent. You're seeing a lot of like people share about like cycle, like sinking and you know, yeah, and they like break it down. Yeah. why you're annoyed with your husband breathing. Yeah, and they're like, or like why you want to jump his bones one day and then yeah. The next day you're like, don't look at me. ah But yeah, sorry. Continue on. totally sidetracked, but it's relevant. So it's very important. So even though I was using this app, I do think it also helped me getting diagnosed with PCOS, getting very familiar with that aspect of myself, which is something I never would have done if I didn't have PCOS ultimately. um But yeah, so we tracked and I do the ovia, not the ovia, the ovulation strips. You can buy them on Amazon and it comes in like packs of 200. I also did with that with my pregnancy test because I was testing so often. So I definitely recommend that. Don't go by the clear blue or like, yeah. those strips. I mean the strips aren't they're not like in a plastic holder or anything like the clear blue or in like, it's like in a clear, a, the like tear top. I don't even know what you call those. Yeah. She knows what they're called. Yeah, so yeah, definitely get those if you're trying to get pregnant, just buy those. Yeah, especially because, and then if you get a positive, you can go buy a more fancy one. Yeah. If you're like, need to be sure. I did like, when I finally got a pregnancy line, I did like, I think I did like eight tests that day and then I went to a doctor because I was like, I don't believe it. Yeah. I'm sure the doctors were like, why are you here? You got eight positives. Yeah. So there is that. think that, you know, six months of struggling, start that process. It took me almost two years, I think, to get an actual diagnosis for what was going on with me. So I was married at that point. m I started the process like six months before my wedding, because I was like, what the heck? I can't fit my wedding dress. Like, my stomach is distended. It was like a whole thing. um And then, but I got married. And then for a year and a half post marriage, we were still trying to figure out what was happening. Another thing to note there is it especially in our times now it may not always be the woman and you should absolutely have follow-up with your husband and his old swimmers too because it is so common now that sperm counts are very low in the US in the last And I have advice for your man, Yeah, so yeah make him do all the these tips Alex has because it's really important because women can get so down on themselves like that you don't work and that your body's not doing what it's meant to be like to do hopefully not all husbands are like, oh, well, you know, maybe we should check me too. My husband, fortunately, was very like, worried. We really wanted to get pregnant and he really, really wanted to get pregnant. I'll do anything. But some don't, or you're just not aware, you know, that that's obviously it's part of it. But like, definitely if you're struggling, get him on track to see someone also. luckily I had a doctor who also was very like, you know, while we're still sorting this out, we should also have your husband go and get like his testosterone checked and all that stuff. uh And he happened to have low testosterone. His like, his swimmer count was great, like fantastic. They were like, wow, considering he had low testosterone. So they ended up giving him testosterone meds and stuff for that. He actually ended up not. taking them though, because we ended up getting pregnant. As soon as we found out all the stuff, the pieces, felt like we all of a sudden got pregnant. And was because we were like, we're just going to pause for now, because we were selling our house, we're moving. And then we got pregnant. It was just wild. Yeah, I guess. that can happen. You hear that a lot too, but it doesn't discount everything that you had to go through to get to that point. it was so stressful. it took us, I think, three years, I think is what it took us to get pregnant with my first Logan. um And so that's why it was such a shock. I know there's people that have way longer struggle stories for that, but three years was a long time and it felt... Yeah, it was very stressful. There was a lot of crying on my part and feeling like I wasn't doing the one thing I'm biologically meant to do. Right. And it's like, you know, I wanted to be a mom and my husband wanted to be a dad and it just felt wrong. And we were young too. Like we got married at 20. We turned 21 after our wedding. So yeah, we got married at 20. So it kind of felt like why are things not working, you know? But also on to man advice for your husband. So get them tested. You know, have that talk with them. about like, if we want to get pregnant, we both need to be doing our part. Something else my husband learned, which is just random and I wouldn't have thought of it, but he done a ton of research while we were trying to conceive. Their underwear can affect uh how their stuff works, apparently. Like, I don't even know. So, but the tightness. Yeah, so particularly the tightness, but also obviously you don't want to overheat the boys. So, yeah. So he ended up getting, which he hates the style underwear, he ended up getting like a more looser boxer style underwear, not the brief boxers, which is what he usually wears um in the hopes that the flow would like help on his end, even though his swimmer count was well, well and good, um just to do everything he could on his side. So that's my random tip for your man. Get them checked. Have that talk. Loose underwear. em But so then we'll go into like the pregnancy part which Alex has a lot of tips for this also because um she ended up having HG and You'll have to say the full name of that because I can't I know you struggle with it, don't even think I say it like 100 % correct. I'm always like, I just come into it with confidence. This is it. So then when I hear doctors say, I'm like, that's a little different. Okay. But basically when you're sick for your whole pregnancy, thankfully did not have HG. I just had pretty typical morning sickness that went away after the first trimester. And with Alex having both pregnancies, she knows that that's just how her body responds. So she's got some tips for you on that. So funny thing about it's called... So HG is what I'm gonna call it, but first I'm gonna tell you what it is. And then from here on out, I will be calling it HG because it's a long name. So it's called Hypermesis Gravidarium. And guys don't come at me. I'm coming at it with confidence. I know that it's a little bit different said. It's like Latin or something. um But basically it's like extreme... through your whole pregnancy morning sickness. And when I say extreme, I don't mean like, you're puking like once or twice a day. I mean, you can't drink, you can't eat, you can't move. Like you are just vomiting your brains out. Yeah, I didn't gain weight for my pregnancies, neither of them, not even my twin one. I lost weight. And so like my doctors were like, you know, if we can't start getting stuff in you, we're gonna have to hospitalize you and put a feeding tube in. Luckily. I didn't get to that point. I did have a lot of hospital visits of getting IV fluids with my second pregnancy, which is my twin pregnancy. My first pregnancy, I luckily was not a mom yet. I was pregnant, um but I was able to very much so just kind of like cocoon myself into bed, which is probably what helped me get through that, I think, because I was able to limit my movements and I was able to just eat teeny tiny tiny micro meals and try and just get it to stay. which was very challenging. uh But with my second pregnancy, I was obviously a mom to a toddler. Pregnant with twins, which is also very challenging. So my husband, which he stepped up a lot with my first pregnancy as well, had to basically solo parent for a while. And then we were in the midst of course, again, moving. When I got pregnant with my twins, we sold our house. It just seems to be what we do. I get pregnant, we sell our house, and we make a move. uh And we moved to Texas while I was pregnant and in the peak of that, my HG with my twins. So that was hard flying. I was so stressed on that flight. Okay, so now here's where I can kind of throw in some tips because when, after you guys moved here, we had to literally have a bucket and bags in the car for Alex because there's no control. There was just no control over when or if you were going to get sick. And so, so we had a bucket in the car. So if you're one of those people that are lucky enough, I'm saying that laughing because you're really not lucky if that happens to you, but. ah Just no shame in having literally, I had bought, it was around Easter time, so it was an Easter one. So it cute, the cute puke bucket. uh But definitely, paper towels, wipes, garbage bags. with my twin pregnancy while my the severest of symptoms kind of went away early on I still was puking randomly, you know through my pregnancy like through till I think once I hit my third trimester I didn't puke anymore, but I would every so often just be triggered and You know, like most people are like, once you get past that morning sickness part, like you're just done. That just wasn't the case so Some of the advice I have for people who might have this going on or you think you have it going on, don't let a doctor gaslight you. It's not normal. They'll be like, it's morning sickness. It's fine. No, it's not. It's different. It's a completely different thing. Don't let them gaslight you into thinking that you are overreacting. You know that you aren't getting what you need to get in your body. Yeah. um uh like, you need to survive this pregnancy. Many people, this is gonna be a sad point of this episode, end up having to terminate their pregnancies with this because it is literally, they're in hospital. Actually, I joined a support group for this on Facebook. I'm still in it. And there's one girl who's like a huge advocate for education on this. And she ended up, she has permanent body damage. She lost internal, she had to have surgeries done. She like still has a heart condition now. It's very extreme and you need to take care of yourself. You need to get yourself to a doctor and don't let them ignore you. Be squeaky. um And funny tidbit, did I say this already about that? It's from the guys. No you didn't, but yeah, we were talking about this not even that long ago. so new science has came out and I cannot give you direct stuff. I'm pretty sure I learned it in my support group because the women were just like ready to set fires. So when you get hypermesis gravidarium, it is not actually the woman's body's fault. It is based off the male. So if you had hypermesis with your, like say you have a different husband or boyfriend or whatever that you're gonna have a baby with, but you've already had a baby. and had that really bad. You might not have it with this one if it's a different partner because... Yeah. I'm like, you're just allergic to the sperm. Yeah. I don't even know. Yeah. it's coming out that that is what it could be or a big contributing factor. kind of makes sense because they also determine the sex of the, you know, so like if it's a boy or girl and then they also determine if you get sick apparently, I don't know. So just, you know, a little fun thing. So if you ever do get it, can be like, this is your fault. Yeah, definitely. So I think one of the biggest um tips for that overall is just don't be afraid to ask for help, whether it's the doctors, it's family, it's friends, especially if you have multiple kids. Yeah, I mean, my mom ended up flying because she was here in Texas and she flew back to Washington to help when you guys are moving and help Cody pack and to like watch Logan and. like basically became a second mom to my toddler during that time she had her So I felt so bad. I felt so bad because I was like missing that time with my child But also because like my mom had to like, know Set not that she's ever gonna say that she like that wasn't putting her out because she loves that time with them But you know, ultimately she was setting aside time to be like, okay, we're gonna have Logan and we're gonna like, you know go do stuff with her and like kid friendly stuff because obviously my dad and my mom are You know empty nesters and they go do whatever they're gonna do um So definitely lean on your family lean on your friends. Whoever is your support system? Get a support group online. That was actually really helpful for me um Yeah, don't isolate yourself don't just try to bear through it because you will you can't it is a literally an illness So it's not part of pregnancy. It is an illness. It has a diagnosis. There's things they can do to help you. Let people help you. Yeah. All right, let's move on to some more fun parts of like, don't know, cause it is hard. really was. Even to watch you go through that and hear how much help was needed, it was like, ugh. Yeah. Yeah. nutrients put in through me through like the vein because it was the only way I wouldn't like throw it up basically. That was a crazy time. uh Same with like, you know, both pregnancies I had, you know, I had hypermesis and with Logan I had the iron infusions too. Cause I, my iron drops so low. had to go get. I don't know. I just had weird pregnancy for you guys. But if you want to talk more about that with me or if you feel like that's going on or if you just need an extra person to support you, DM us. I am happy to be that person for you. Yeah, definitely. um Alright, so moving on to some other things. What would you say about body pillows? Body pregnancy pillows? Do you really? Okay, so you can at least get your money's worth out of it if you buy one. So I actually, don't have my pregnancy one anymore. My mom had got me with Logan, my, uh the big U shaped one. um And honestly, I should have had it sooner. Like I don't even care that it kicked Cody out of the, cause we had like a small bed at that point. I was like. This is what I needed in my life because it like it is built to go like between your legs and support all your pressure points So like it was supporting under my belly It supporting under my head like I like with my neck and then my legs and then it comes behind you to support your back so that you're not like having to hold your muscles up, you know Or that you shaped one right now and with the twins I used uh a long just a long standard body pillow. Yeah And that was also extremely helpful. I 100 % am on board with the support your body thing. Because now I'm not pregnant and I still do it. Otherwise my hips hurt. Yeah, yeah, that's funny. overall for this whole category, we are ones that believe that less is more. So for like the newborn stage, and you guys have heard us talk about this many times already, less is more. You just don't need all the best, biggest, fanciest things. But what I will say for pregnancy and postpartum, you want to pamper yourself. Get all of the freedom moms, you know, stuff to help you through that. time. adult diapers do it. yeah. would have like never uh was it you that told me about that and I was like really and well I had z-sections with both of mine and they were such a lifesaver because you literally feel like you're just going to fall out Everywhere and so that was so helpful to just like keep everything like feeling up and tucked it back in with, I had a vaginal delivery with my first, but it was amazing for that too, because you just feel so hollowed out and like your body just like won't support itself almost. And it's amazing. there are these things, they're like, what are they called? Postpartum girdles. I'm pretty sure it's literally what they're. Belly support after, I don't know. You just Google it. a postpartum girdle. I actually got one for somebody recently and I'm pretty sure that's what I put in. And they, some of them have like, they're just that is what it is, but some of them, like the one I've gifted recently has layers to it. So it'll be like, this is for stage one, like which is like right after and then stage two. So like you're weaning yourself off of the support it gives you. um And I found it really helpful for one because of the emptiness and like while everything's getting back in place But also I had a lot of hip pain after my first pregnancy And so it like kind of binds because it comes low it kind of like binds your hips together a little Yeah, definitely. So yeah, all those postpartum things. And then I would say all the breastfeeding things. So all different types of ointments, because you don't know what's going to work. All different types of shields, the nipple shields, and the silver shields, and the ice packs, and just the everything everythings for you. I don't think I used the shields, but I did use the ice pack or the cooling. They have like those cooling gel sticky things. Those helped a lot because you're going to be so sore on those nipples. Like so sore. All the things I also got, like I think one of the things I invested in for my first, I didn't do it with my second because I knew they were going to be a C-section was the sit-spas stuff. If you have vaginal delivery, like that is 100 % worth it. feels relieving. Almost anything Frida though. Yeah, I think that freedom online is pretty amazing. Even that freedom baby line is too. I think those are all some of my favorite stuff, including the booger sucker, you guys. Don't pass up on the booger sucker. And it works well. one. But we've talked about this, all these things before. um Some other tips that Alex has got on here is the double zipper jammies. When my kids, so my youngest is about to be nine, so they really didn't have these cool things when my kids were little, but... What's funny is the double zipper jammies were kind of like Major introduced I feel like and it was by a like a more expensive brand of when I was pregnant with Logan I was like man. These are so cool. I can't afford $40 per footie like yeah Things are so cute. They're so cool, and I just kind of kept looking at them But then eventually these more affordable brands like you know Carter's and stuff like that started having Zipper doubles up her footless doubles up her footed And they're amazing like 100 % those should be your jammies of choice for your kids make it so easy for you to change a diaper without having to like totally undress the whole baby. You can just get their legs out and change the diaper and put them back. Yeah. no pants, just onesie or double zipper. yeah, but nightgowns, yeah. But then that's kind of what they had when my kids were little. Another one of our big tips, I know we've talked about all of these newborn pregnancy stuff before in a past episode in season one. Yeah, it had to have been. But we're huge on buying convertible car seats versus buying an infant carrier purely for the fact that they... are expensive and they last way longer. um I think the convertibles, they say they go all the way down to five pounds. Yeah. So I get the Graco Forever is kind of my go-to one in part because Costco carries that one and I can get it for the best price of anywhere there. That's my go-to, but also the Graco Slim Fits are nice. I think those are called something else now, but. Oh yeah, those are cool. Those were new when the twins, I had the twins basically. And so they were still like the big books. Yeah, they're really cool. And then you just baby wear with them. So you don't necessarily have like the infant carrier to take out of the car seat. But if you baby wear, which was my absolute favorite, huge passion for baby wearing when my kids were little. um Had all the wraps, all the carriers, all the everything. like so many like fantastic hand-pinned nails from you for that. But doing that just was our kind of like go to. You don't have to have a stroller, which we're going to talk more about strollers, but you didn't have to worry about it if you're baby wearing. You just get up and go. and not only for like when you're going out and about, which is a great way for you to get out with a newborn baby as well and be comfortable and they're comfortable is to baby wear. Cause they're not going to like a stroller. mean, I know very few infants, like new babies that enjoy a stroller or, or even a car seat, honestly. because it's just a lot for them sensory wise, but baby wearing great way to get out. We have some recs for that too. I really liked the Moby. The Mobi is great for first starting out. a stretchy wrap that only supports baby up to maybe 20 pounds, probably less than that. Yeah, but you can get a more structured wrap um or then you can move over to one that has buckles instead and has adjustments. Yeah, or Ergobaby. There's so many different brands now than there was when I was baby wearing, so I don't know what the new ones are. almost all the brands now have a mesh version of their buckled structured carriers. um And I have one that is a mesh one. That's a toddler one. Yes, you guys, I baby wear my toddler sometimes. um But the mesh one is amazing for Texas. It breathes so much and it gets way less stinky because what, you guys, we sweat too. Yeah, what he. So I would say for invest in that if you're in a hot state or if you're a hot person my husband prefers to wear that one as well Mm-hmm Okay, well let's go into like baby stage So kind of out of that newborn stage and into baby, and we can just pick off with the strollers What recommendations we may have once they get so big or so heavy depending on your frame you may need a stroller? Well you might need a wagon which alexis has experience with both have gone through strollers, you guys. I did too, but I was like an avid baby wearer. And so I would get a stroller and then I would get rid of a stroller and then I would get a different stroller and then I would get another stroller. Usually all secondhand. I never used them though. I would have them for periods of time. I think the only time that I actually used a stroller was when we went to Disneyland when Jameson was one. Oh, and you used that little umbrella shoulder when we went to that like thousand acre Christmas lights thing or whatever it's called up in Washington with Lila, I think it was. the probably the two times I ever used the stroller Like in it it was just not my thing, but m So it kind of helped also because you could wear and then like one could walk, you know. So I had the twins. I just like I the twins and my child, my oldest was. Elder toddler young child, you know, at that point, they were she was four. Yeah, she was four when they were born. No. I don't think they were. Oh yeah, so maybe. She maybe not even four yet. Three, almost four maybe? Yeah. Why do we not know what your kids' age gap is? Is it three and a half also? I don't know. Ultimately, she loved to walk and stuff, so I wasn't super worried about her, but I had twins and I, you know, can't always have another adult with me, basically. And I don't do the infant carriers and I wouldn't want to with twins anyways, because holy cow, that's a lot of weight. So I did some double carrying every so often where you carry on the front and carry on the back. It's okay once it gets so big. It's a lot if you're... Yeah. pound babies are 40 pounds on your body. No, it's like a lot. so I did that a little bit. It was not my favorite just because like Lisa said, it's a heavy. So I tried some different strollers, you guys. I wanted a wagon from the Gatco. My husband was like, mm. And you know, there wasn't really a lot of infant options. If you had a wagon, like a Wonderfold style wagon, um then they do now have more infant style options. So I would definitely look into those if that's something that strikes your fancy because you have more kids um or just you want. the room, I don't know, ah because you can use it like a shopping cart to, you know, pop the baby in there and shopping cart. So I started with a Mockingbird, yeah, a Mockingbird stroller and it was so nice. It was, they can be singles, they can be doubles. They're so nice. The fabric is so nice. It's like basically like a knockoff. I say knockoff, even though it is also very high quality and it was not really cheap either, but it's cheaper than. is a knockoff Noona, I think is the one that it is. um many of them have the same styles anymore. It's hard to tell what they are when you see them. same fabric, same frame build. It's like the same quality, but it was like half the price. And they have them where they did at Target. They also have their website where they have so many patterns and color options and so many cute things. But ultimately, you could do that, and you can add a toddler stroller thing to it on the side also if you wanted. And you could flip them any which way around. They can lay down. They can be facing you. They can be facing out. They can do anything with that. It's nice, but it's long. Yeah, the double, yeah. double, yeah, it's long. So I sold it after, I think they were six months old when I sold it. I used it for a little bit and I was like, meh, because it's so long and hard to like not hit people. It was just so long. Which any tandem style stroller is gonna be long. Like the ones that are. um There's the, yeah, the in front. Yeah, the ones that stack basically. They're all gonna be long. So that's my only thing about if you have, you wanna do two, be prepared for it to be like driving a semi. So from that, I went to a side by side. I did a side by side umbrella stroller and a side by side Jeep stroller, I think was the other one. The umbrella stroller was nice because it's super compact, but it broke down really quick, ultimately, was my complaint for that one. Like they just, you know, they're cheap. So it broke down quickly. um And then the side-by-side Jeep stroller was super nice. We got it secondhand and it already had a couple issues with it. And I was like, it's fine. And we kept that one probably for, we kept that one for quite a while. um The only thing about it is it's not, while it does fold kind of flat, it's still very wide when you fold it. So you have to have ample trunk space. like, or not really use your trunk. Like will fit in a car trunk, no problem, I think. And it fit in like my Ford Explorer back with all the seats up very easily. And I still had room in the trunk. But ultimately I ended up phasing out because it was kind of just breaking down. We got a second hand or third hand. I don't even know. It was pretty broken in and sold it. uh And then I finally, finally convinced my husband that we should get a wagon basically. um I think I actually got the wagon and had the Jeep stroller for a little bit and would kind of like go back and forth between them. But the wagon was such a game changer for my family because my oldest could sit in there when we do like long trips um and my twins could be comfortably in there. We could do it with the seats without the seats. We can go shopping with it. Cause like I said, you can use it like a cart. Yeah. family can put all their crap in it when we go to the zoo. It's used as like the everyone's hauler and I even added extra cup holders on the side for it so everybody could put their water bottles around it. Yeah, and it's got the shade, all of our snack coolers. So I 100 % honestly, I have this wagon, the Wonderfold, and that is a more expensive stroller. So, but I think, what is it? The Keens and Jeep, they both have a stroller too. And honestly, if I was like, meh, about the wagon, I just really was like, it's worth the money for me. But if you're looking for more affordable version, there are those and they, I think they do still have buckles if that's something that you're worried about. They just don't have the elevated seats like the Wonderfold. um I wanted the one on elevated seats so I could put their diaper bag in my purse and all that stuff under them. But if you're not, if that's not important to you, I know tons of people have those and they use them all the time. Yeah. they use it not even just as a stroller, they'll take out like the awning or whatever and just use it as a normal wagon, like a totem wagon. So those are my stroller wrecks for you. You're gonna have to find what works best for you. Obviously I went through like six. So ultimately the one I wanted originally is the one that I've enjoyed the most, I think still. But my other, and then the Mockingbird, that I enjoyed that one a lot too. It just was a semi. Yeah. Okay, so other really good purchases are... the baby stage, honestly. list here, like where I wanted to start. Yeah. yeah, we need to talk about... m Sorry guys, we're working through this here. Honestly, my kids don't have a ton of toys at that stage. One of the biggest things they've enjoyed is like a ball drop style game. You where they have like the ball towers and the ball goes down. It just is mesmerizing. The Black and White books, I highly recommend. Like if you're looking for more book... friendly at that age. The black and white wicks are very stimulating for them. um Ultimately, they don't need a lot, you know? We like the... talk about your formula shaker balls. yeah, yeah, okay. With my first, she was a super breast feeder. So I didn't have to worry about formula, you guys. She would not take a bottle, she would not take a binky, she was a refuser. But my twins refused to breastfeed, thank goodness. I was dreading, I was dreading it. So was like somebody was thinking of me on that moment. They were like, no mom, you've had enough. um So they didn't really like breastfeeding. They didn't like latching. They were just kind of lazy. um So I started introducing the bottles that I had gotten a few different brands for us to try, which I also recommend doing. Don't commit yourself to a specific brand. Yeah, get a bunch of different ones until you find the one. Luckily for pacifiers, my girls weren't super picky, but they're also the only ones that took pacifiers. That's my three. ah But... Ultimately, I had to get formula, obviously, and we had to go through a few different formulas. And this particular one that we landed on because they had some intolerances was very hard to mix. Like, it would not mix. Yeah, and like, if you finally got it mixed, it was just foam. Like, the whole bottle, turned into foam, and then it would have to sit for eons. So I did a ton of research of like alternative ways to mix and some people are like I'll make it for the day in the picture and I was like I'm just not gonna do that you know we go out a lot it just doesn't work for our family. Another one was using a hand milk frother don't recommend that don't listen to that advice. all the foam that you got and had to wait forever for it to settle. so that doesn't, I mean it does and it doesn't work. Like if you like do like a start, stop, start, stop, start, stop, like you could get it. But it takes for a long time for you to not just make it foam. My girls had a lot of reflux, like really bad reflux. So it was really important to me to not get foam. So ultimately I found deep, deep, deep in like a Reddit feed, uh these protein shaker balls, these mini protein shaker balls, and they fit inside almost all bottles. Even my, I had one of those Dr. Brown, like a skinny, um if you compress it, it will fit in those. ah And while you're like, but you're still shaking it, you are, and you'll get a little foam, but you're shaking it for like a fraction of the time and it mixes way better. and you get a way smoother bottle. it helped a ton with my girls' reflex. So I highly recommend those. If you want the link for them, just message us and I will send you them. But I got them on Amazon. You should be able to just type in mini protein shaker balls, or those little wire things. oh Think that wraps up the baby stage overall Obviously when you're a mom for as long as we have been combined you come across lots of tips So if you're interested in more things in the baby stage Things that purchase or not or just if you're struggling with something in the baby stage Let us know and maybe we have something else Okay Okay right, I feel like this has to be shared. I don't want other moms to suffer like I did. My super breast feeder, she breastfed all the way up till she turned three. Yes, you guys, you can judge me. I judge myself. It's fine. uh I know some moms are really about that. I love that for you. I was not, I tried to get her to stop at a year. Obviously I failed for two years. I did everything. I researched the heck out of this. I asked advice from people. I went on groups. And I don't post in groups. I posted in groups to be like, what do I do? And the only thing that I hadn't tried, just because I felt odd about it, was I got this thing called... sucker buster I think is what it's called and it's like a chapstick for your boobs and you just put it on it stinks to high heaven you guys it's so stinky yeah it's anem oil kind so it's natural um but it makes it physically stink but also it tastes nasty so I did that would you know it that day I broke my super breast feeder So I definitely recommend that. Some other tactics were like, you know, put BNAs on your breasts and say, mommy has an owie. Once they're old enough to understand, like at one, they kind of get that. That didn't work for mine. She was like, okay. I don't care. Another one was like introducing more foods. So they lose interest more, like more fun foods. You know, obviously there's the pacifier, but she wouldn't take pacifiers. But the neem oil chapstick sucker buster thing, it worked. I highly recommend. if you have a kid who is just so committed to it. All right, that's the end of my baby one. I just felt it was needed. that, for you, it went into toddler anyway, so which is where we're going now. Um, Alex has all the tips on this stuff because she's much newer at that, you know, stage of children. she remembers a lot more. I don't quite remember as much, from those stage with my kids, but, um, Alex just went through potty training with the twins, which was harder than with your first, and so I think you came out- of it with some pretty good tips because it was new for you. Yeah, it's a struggle. My first, I always joke that I can't take credit for her potty training because she just was like, I'm potty training and she just did it. Yeah, she just that way. Like she's just one of those kids that's like, she puts her mind to it. She's doing it that day. So I, one tip I do have that I do think helped with Logan and with the twins was I got a potty really early. Everybody was like, they don't need a potty yet. Like that's really early. But my kids come to the bathroom with me and I'm sure a lot of other moms, their kids come to the bathroom with you and so they're watching you go potty. So I got to potty early for her so she could be like, mommy's going potty, this is my potty. And she could sit on it even though she wasn't using it or she would be clothed or whatever. So kind of just really early on introduced that by seeing me go potty and that she has a potty and where she will eventually be going potty. So I do recommend that. I introduced I think at, I think for Logan. She was around eight months when I got it. You could do a year though, cause that's about when I started introducing concepts of that. um So I do think that helped for both, all three. And then, like I said, Logan potty trained herself. She even nighttime potty trained herself like that same week almost. So it was just wild. I was very fortunate, you guys. That is not usual. So don't expect that from your kids. Expect them to be like, and struggle. Or, you know, another hack I have before I get into it with the twins uh is encouraging outdoor pottying. I know that sounds gross, but I have dogs. It does work. um If you have a boy, this works for my aunt. She has two boys and she was like, how I potty trained was like, go pee on a tree. And it was really fun for them. And then that they practice Amy and they practice. And then like, it was like, it slowly converted to inside. So I recommend that as a summer. Like if you could start in summertime, that's nice anyways because they can just be naked which is well how I potty train is being naked butted And just be prepared to get pee on your furniture you guys so don't um get expensive couches if you're having a baby and or rugs ah or doors or curtains Yeah, so I encouraged the potting outside, which that helped with the twins as well. Once I was like, well, you just go pee on a tree if you want, like a puppy. And they, all my kids, love being dogs. Like they love acting like dogs or cats. It's their alternative personality. um And they started taking it to it that way, but they wouldn't stop potting in a pull-up or undies or on the floor either. Like they couldn't quite connect the urges. And they were very resistant, my- twins were, they would get into each other's pull-ups and they'd take each other's pull-ups off and it was nasty. Nasty. uh That's something apparently really common with twins too. Just to prepare you if you're having twins, you know. uh Or you have twins and they're babies and haven't reached that stage yet. They take each other's stuff off and they, it's gross guys. I'm talking not just pee diapers. You know what I'm saying here. uh It's very, yeah. Lots of showers. And they just... I don't know, I would get one going and I'd be like, this is cool if I could get one potty trained, the other one will do it and no, the other one would be like, no. And then the one that I had almost doing it would be like, oh, okay, we're not doing this. Yeah. With just simply being like, no, yeah, it was so silly. Ultimately, what worked for me with the twins was not potty books, even though that does work for some people, it was not songs, even though they did enjoy that. And it wasn't even really... Like some people do like charts, like sticker charts and stuff like that. They weren't interested in that. What worked was straight up bribing them. Yeah, well and that's I have another friend who was doing potty training right before you and she's like Do you have any hacks and I was like go to the dollar store? Let them buy all of the things whatever they want and if they go potty they get one of their things and so I told you the same thing and I think you finally took the girls to go do that yeah, I did. I kind of put it off because I was like, am I ready to restart potty training with them? Because it was such, I mean, they're not even through yet and they're potty trained now and they're working on nighttime potty training. So they're still kind of a little ahead of the curve anyways. It just was like such a different experience for me, well, not so not to dog on my toddlers, you guys. But yeah, go to the dollar store, go to like our favorite little shop or get bag of candy, whatever floats your boat. party, like party packages of stuff because you can get more for less. Yeah, stickers, they love stickers. we did sticker books. So anyways, we did that. We did a bunch of different stuff. I spent like probably $50 because it two kids um at the dollar store getting a bunch of prizes. That would be enough for all of them. um And they put it all in a bucket. And I basically was like, you pee on this toilet, you'll get a reward from this bucket. And they were like, what? So it took a day. of trial and error for them to understand, but once they got that potty in the toilet and they got a prize, it was like, oh, I like this. And it was, oh Yeah, we were all like, congrats and happy, and they just loved that. So definitely like praising and the bribery worked for me. And it worked because I think they picked the prizes. So they knew they were good prizes too. um And ultimately after that, I kind of weaned them down. So I did like two weeks of every single potty, like every single potty got a reward. And then I dropped down to, you know, give me three potties and you'll get a reward. And then I dropped down to give me a whole day of potties and you'll get a reward. And then eventually I just like became where they just weren't even asking anymore, you know? um And I just didn't refill. So that's my suggestion is try all the things, but definitely don't be scared to straight up bribe your kid. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, one of the things from when my kids were toddlers was when this reminded me, because of the celebrating, when they would fall or if they would bump into something or whatever, I would never be super coddling and like, oh my god, what has happened? Are you OK? I would always just be like, oh, just brush it off. You're OK. I feel like that really helps, though. Then they're more confident in when little things like that happen. Obviously if they fell and busted their lip or their teeth or whatever, like you just kind of gauge what... where they're coming, like what's their level, like did it actually hurt? Are they waiting to see me react? You know, so then I'll wait. And be like, oh, okay. Did you fall? Like, and just say what happened and not be like, you're hurt or ow, or, you know, trying to just be like, you fell. Can you get back up or can you pick up your bike or, know, kind of take out the pain factor of it because it might not have hurt. Right. Right. Right. And when you react to that, it doesn't set them up well. I mean, you guys know I am super clumsy and I run into doors and what have you all the time, so my kids are probably like, this is normal, just bonking into stuff. I think that redirection in toddlers is really helpful also just for like if they're doing something that you don't like and just kind of making a positive aspect of it so that they can kind of redirect em a whole, the toddler brain doesn't take in like, no, you don't do that very well. What it does take in well is a gentle, oh, we're not gonna do that, but we can do this, something better. And that works well for um if you're out and about too, like walking or bike riding or at the store. redirecting them in some way, in some kind of fun positive way. I know with like my girls, they'll sometimes they'll be like very want to get picked up and coddled, you know, and I'll be like, oh, you know, like what, see if we can find six red flowers or let's see if we can find, if we're outside and kind of make a game of it is one way I do redirection, but I'm not home and able to give them a different activity, you know. well my answer to that has been because you've been doing this with the girls I'm like you have two legs you can walk and then they just look at me like Auntie you're crazy. I'm like you're fine. Let's go And they pull on your clothes, which I know you hate so that's usually when I'm like nope, let's go move it on Yeah, it drives me freaking bonkers. That's like one of those like overwhelming things for me is when my clothes get pulled on. Yeah, and I'm like, please stop touching my clothes. I Think another thing also with toddlers is obviously you want them to like start learning But doing it in a very passive way I think is way more helpful than like trying to make them sit down and do something just, or at least my toddler, and I'm sure your toddlers, are very chaotic. mean, I don't want to say everybody's toddler is that way, but like, they have a lot of energy and they are little squirrels, very easily distracted, you know? so just building in like singing and making it fun, know, like numbers are counting while you're playing things, things like that really, I think go a lot further than trying to get a structured. Yeah. OK, ready, set, one, two, three, four, five, go. And so they start learning that one, two, three, four, five. And same with colors, where I do a lot of like, oh, go get the blue whatever for me or for you or whatever. And then they'll be like, is this blue? And I'll be like, yeah, that is blue. Or if it's not, I'll be like, that's not the blue whatever. That's the orange whatever. And then it starts to click slowly. While it seems like you're not actually teaching, you are actually teaching. Because remember, they don't know anything. They're new. Yeah. So everything that is new information to them is learning. Mm-hmm one of the super super cool things that I think that Alex and their family did was get the girls when they were really young the balance spikes We try to do that with Delilah and she just never took to it that but my kids don't really like to work or like set their mind to something and work for it so I think that it just was too much work both of mine didn't like the balance spike but your kids do so good on them with our oldest, we, Cody and I were kind of just like, we'll just get this balance bike and see what happens. And I had done a lot of like, you know, passive research on like, you know, stuff to when to introduce certain things and stuff like that. And the balance bikes were kind of becoming like an even bigger deal around that time too. We introduced that to her around one for Logan. um And she's, she's pretty, She just took to it. We lived on a property and she would just push really hard and she would just put her legs up and just coast. And she was doing that at one and it was insane. And I was just so impressed with her. And then at four maybe. guys moved here and all the kids went out to play and that day I think so. So she was three then. And she, I was like jaw, it was just jaw dropping for me. Cause my kids were not like that. And she literally got on the bike with the pedals and took off. No training wheels. She just took, she was gone. That was that. She was done. Yeah. she's been on this balance bike and that's the hardest part of riding a bike is balancing. And she had that mastered and so it was just. think at that point, Jameson still had training wheels and that really lit a fire under his butt. Was like, wait, she can do it and she's younger. And then he was able to do it. But it's just that security factor. But skip the training wheels and get those balance bikes. And I don't know how you would make your kids use them. Because my kids straight up, they had zero interest in them. with Logan, she just did it, but she's like a very adventurous, very I'm gonna do it kid. Yeah, so obviously you gotta gauge how your kid is, but like a lot of positive reinforcement about it of like, can do this, you can do hard things. Like I know that this is like, you you're learning something, but also like we rode bikes and my dad rides bikes. And so like Logan was familiar and like she rode in like the bike seats with my parents when she was little. So it wasn't like she. like a bike was a new concept, you know? So I think that helped too. And like she would ride dirt bikes also before she had that too. Yeah, so like she was familiar with that like balancing and two-wheeled bike concept. And then with the twins, they obviously had Logan, you know? So they were, they're gonna take to things simpler probably than like it was their first time. um But yeah, I would recommend getting the balance bike. It's worth. um They have some cheaper versions now on Amazon. That's actually what I got my girls and they have like more of like a board under for them to put their feet on once they get coasting. Cause the one Logan had had nothing. She just had to like lift her feet straight out. But you can get those ones like the Strider bike, I think is a bigger brand and they can go all the way from like little toddler to like all the way to like five or six. Like they can size up with them. And so I definitely recommend that it is kind of worth the investment. They're going to have it for quite a while. Unless you want them to the pedal bike at three. I don't know. Like, yeah. definitely. Okay, you guys, well, we actually are at our time limit for this episode, so we did, we always go on our side stories and have so many good things to share with you, so we are gonna have to end here and come back with a part two, potentially a bonus episode coming your way. Yeah. So keep eye out. We'll let you guys know when it comes out.