Episode 4: Mind Matters

Concept & Host:  Priyanka Nomula
Designed & Directed: Sandeep Raj
Presented by: Aussie Talkies
Guest: Bhanu Sree

Can mental health challenges be more than just a personal struggle? Bhanu, a vibrant Aussie Indian with deep roots in Vijayawada, shares her harrowing yet inspiring journey through anxiety, panic attacks, and emotional extremes. Her story takes a dramatic turn when a chilling experience on tram tracks prompts her to seek the professional help that changed her life. As Bhanu bravely recounts the strain her struggles placed on her family and how her husband's unwavering support became a lifeline, listeners are invited to reflect on the power of empathy and understanding. With candid honesty, she explores the triggers that may have contributed to her mental health battles, including a painful friendship breakup and her mother's own mental health challenges.

This episode serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of kindness in the face of mental health issues. We discuss viewing mental health as a medical condition, not just a personal choice, and the importance of being compassionate and avoiding harmful judgments. By sharing her personal recovery journey, Bhanu hopes to inspire others to embrace vulnerability and seek help when needed. Let her story remind us all that it's perfectly okay not to be okay, and that compassion can be a powerful catalyst for healing and understanding. Join us for this deeply moving conversation, and discover how fostering kindness and support can make all the difference for those navigating their mental health journeys.

Chapters

• 0:00 Overcoming Mental Health Challenges Through Support
• 16:35 Practicing Kindness Towards Mental Health

Transcript

Priyanka: 0:00

Welcome, banu. How are you? I'm good. Thanks, priyanka. How are you? I'm good, thank you, and thanks for coming to share your journey. Thanks for inviting me. So, before we start into the topic and go into your journey, I would like you to introduce yourself to our viewers and listeners. So who's Banu?

Bhanu: 0:19

Okay, well, I'm Banu. I'm a girl from a very close-knit family from Vijayawada, a city in Andhra Pradesh, india. You know how it will be. I'm very pampered, I'm a very people person and I'm very talkative. Like I just can't stop when I start talking, I can't stop and my friends said you've got a verbal diarrhea. That's a plus for our show. So now I'm a proud Aussie Indian. I'm working in Victorian Public Services as a Prosecution Support Officer and I love creative work, like you know. Decor to decor, all kind of stuff, and today especially, I'm here stuff. And today especially, I'm here to share my journey, my experience, how I heal from my mental health, how I over come to all the mental health issues and I all yeah, just to share my experience.

Priyanka: 1:16

That's great. So when you went, what were those first initial symptoms that you thought that you had some, you know, a mental health issue going on? Were there any initial symptoms?

Bhanu: 1:29

Yeah, the initial symptoms is anxiety, like sometimes, like you know, shortness of breath, mainly my emotions. I was like I'm extremely happy and extremely angry. I was like I'm extremely happy and extremely angry, like there is emptiness and also panic attacks, massive panic attacks, and there is a constant pittish feeling in my stomach. So anxiety is the main thing and the anxiety turned into panic attacks. The panic attacks is the main symptom or a wake-up call for me. Yeah, these are the initial symptoms I got.

Priyanka: 2:13

So I believe that those were your initial symptoms and that would have driven into something else. Yes, were there any significant challenges that you faced with?

Bhanu: 2:21

these. Yeah, especially moving out of the bed was so difficult and you just need to pretend that you're a strong person and also lack of sleep. Because you don't have sleep, you don't have appetite, and especially during 1 am to 3 am, it's like I don't want to sleep, I don't want to read a book or I don't want to disturb my kid or my husband um, there's no one to talk, and that's a difficult time. The most difficult time is 1am to 3am and there is like one day I just ended up on tram tracks. I just ended up on tram tracks. Wow, not knowingly.

Bhanu: 3:05

Today you asked me how, why, when I don't know, I just really don't know. I'm just, it was a good day. I'm just crossing a road to take a tram and get into Flinders Street and then get back to my routine. And I just ended up on the tram track and you didn't realize, I didn't realize, and then there's people are calling me because it's ongoing traffic. And then, when I suddenly realized where I am, and then I outbursted I'm crying. I just cried out of my lungs and that's my biggest challenge to save myself. How come I ended up there? I really don't know.

Priyanka: 3:43

That must have been really hard, not only on you but your family, your work, yes, um did you like?

Bhanu: 3:49

did you get good support or what? What happened? Yeah it it definitely took a big toll on my husband. Uh, initial stages, he, he don't understand what's happening with me and why I'm outbursting. Um, because my emotions are either I'm too emotional, like crying, or I'm I'm very happy, like definitely it took a big toll on my husband. And and then, because we share work, our household works and where we contribute equally and it's not normal anymore. Yeah, and then we decided to take a professional help. We seek professional help. I was under medication for quite a some time and I need to take a break from my work. My mom, my organization, supported me so well. They're my biggest supporters, which I'm really thankful for that's awesome, yeah, yeah.

Priyanka: 4:44

So you, you did seek help after seek medical help after you know that tram episode.

Bhanu: 4:50

Yes, it is definitely a challenging period for me Because, yeah, it definitely took a big impact on me. That that's my wake up call. What's happening? That's not a normal walking to the trunk truck like you just don't end up there and when you know, don't know the reason, like what is that reason? I thought that was a good day. I had a lunch with my colleagues. It's.

Bhanu: 5:15

It's a really good, funny day for me, like you know and then you said it certainly like, like there is no reason for it, like, and finding a reason it's a difficult task, like you know. This might be this, that might be how come I just ended up there. Or because of this, at the time, I'm going through a massive friendship breakup that might be triggering me. This might be triggering me, I don't know.

Priyanka: 5:37

While we talk about the triggers, right? So every person, one time or the other in their life, they have these issues going on and there might be a root cause or a trigger or something like that. Right or might not be, I do like sometimes people don't understand. So, from your perspective, did you have anything that caused or contributed to your yeah, yeah, illness, call it trigger or history or whatever.

Bhanu: 6:07

yes, definitely I had a history. My mom passed away with mental health illness. She committed suicide and when I was so young, like my early 20s and there is a massive awareness gap we couldn't save her at all. I remember there's a time she needed my hug and there's one day the particular one incident till haunts me she was sleeping on my lap. Being a young girl, I just pushed her away and I said are you too heavy a mark? Can you move? So that was so hard, like you know.

Bhanu: 6:45

I want to say sorry to her. I want to save her how, I don't know, and this has haunted me the rest of my life, because she just had a battle of her own, all alone, no help at all, and she gave up and then she committed suicide and then my dad passing away during COVID times. I haven't seen my mom or my dad during their last rituals, so I only remember my mom. We only saw my mom just a toe finger and a sari which I gifted my mom for Mother's Day. That's the only last memory I got from my mother. That's very hard. It is Even to listen that's very hard.

Priyanka: 7:26

It is.. Even to listen. That's a very hard thing.

Bhanu: 7:28

It just sits in your brain. And also moving to abroad. Having a close circle of friends is very important and I had a massive friendship breakup during that time. It was very hard on me and these are the traumas, added up to my symptoms, which caused me to extreme anxiety and panic attacks. Because these are the traumas from last 12 years. It just not happened like that because I'm not accepting, like I'm pushing away because I'm strong, I'm strong, I'm strong, I can do this, I can do this, but it just sits in your brain. And even my mother-in-law's death I couldn't accept so many deaths in the family, one after one, one after one. There is no time, there's no grieving time. I didn't grieve properly at all, just escaping that thing and then just pretending that I'm strong. So yeah, in just two years we lost both our parents, my dad, my in-laws. So much happened, so yeah definitely these traumas.

Priyanka: 8:36

Yeah, so that massive impact. What did you do to basically overcome or cope with this? How, what was, what were your methods Like? How did you get help?

Bhanu: 8:42

So seeking a professional help that there's no shame seeking help, definitely a professional help where you're required, you will understand. You will definitely understand when you needed a help. And also your inner circle, tighten up your inner circle, whoever supports you. Change your lifestyle Travel Travel helps you to you. Change your lifestyle travel Travel helps you a lot. And I started awareness of this mental illness for 25 days so that I can get examples like I can get an experience, you know, from different people's perspective. And also, my brother came over to help me out and he gifted me a dog. It's like you know, he changed my life, my little one and all the meditation I did 45 days, isha Kriya. Then I'm when you're doing Isha Kriya, you can practice. There's a mudra called kashapa mudra, so that helps you to, uh, remove all the negative senses. So I did that one for 45 days. So changing the inner circle, like you know.

Priyanka: 9:57

so yeah, I'll come back to the isha, kriya and the other mechanisms that you used. But you said, like inner circle, you need to tighten your inner circle. Yes, yes, how, like I understand you know we should have a close-knit inner circle where you do not have. Yeah, you know, there's no fear of judgment. Let's just say you have to be yourself.

Bhanu: 10:18

Yes, so you found your inner circle yeah, because I eliminated the people who is not supportive, making judgments, because there are people who can change your life. When you're changing people can judge you, or there are some other people who can actually see you growing, see you healing. So I just kept a bunch of people who can be supportive to me during this time, without any judgments. If you're passing judgments, that's it. I don't own any explanation. So I just because I'm a people person, I'm very talkative, like I'm always a people person, people pleasing person, like you know, I just stopped doing that. I just want to heal myself. I don't need any extra noise around me. So, being a woman, you needed a definitely you needed a friend to vent it out 100%, no matter what.

Priyanka: 11:14

So do you think all of these coping and overcoming mechanisms that you said you have support, network, professional help. You said you love traveling so you went about traveling and you had a puppy dog, so all of these would have contributed to towards overcoming that is 100% from my experience.

Bhanu: 11:41

see, everyone's journey is different, so you need to find your own way out. How can you? You know, everybody's mindset is different, so you need to work according to your mind, according to your body. Don't push yourself because nobody coming to push you until, unless you accept, you accept and seek help, there's no one coming out for you to push. Come out, come out, bhanu, like do it. Nobody's going to come, you know. And self-love, self-love is definitely important. It's just not like going for manicures or a brunch dates. Um, these, this feels good, right, it's not self-love. So self-love means, banu, you messed up, just get up and fix it. So these kind of forgiving yourself, yeah, exactly, exactly, exactly, and giving, like you know, there's no judgments, no judgment.

Priyanka: 12:36

So yeah, Traveling in your journey through this episode, I felt like you went through a lot. To actually go through that and face what has happened in your life and then have an effect of it later on in the years is very hard and you have adapted to a few things that helped you obviously professional help and lifestyle changes etc. So do you think you have completely healed?

Bhanu: 13:01

or that's if I heal completely. I will say no, not completely recovered, but I don't have suicidal tendencies. I don't have massive panic attacks. Definitely I don't have suicidal tendencies. I don't have massive panic attacks, definitely I don't have those ones. But, moreover, now I know how to protect myself when it's triggering point. I know how to overcome that.

Bhanu: 13:25

If I'm having, like you know, I'm having kind of thoughts, I'll just hug my dog or hug my girl, like my baby girl, for 30 seconds. Like you know, everybody knows my, my family. Like you know, 30 seconds hug means oh, she's not good, so I'll hug it out and inhale and exhale deeply and let it out. So these things, now I know how to protect myself. Um, like you know what triggers me. My mind is under my control. Definitely I can work it out. Or, if it's out of control, I have therapy. I have my therapist. I can call her anytime or, you know, seek help.

Bhanu: 14:02

Or I have my close friends who I reconnected with because during this process, knowing your true friends are really important. Like you know, even though you have brother, you have your husband, but being a woman, like you know, you need to have a good friend, either it's a male or female doesn't matter, but you need to have a friend who don't judge you at all. So I reconnected my childhood friends, my school friends, my uni friends, my inter inter friends, so I went, I traveled, we reconnected, so I just called them and then, you know, went it out.

Priyanka: 14:37

That's awesome, because you just start where you left with your like childhood friends, and I feel like if you're traveling with them, it will be even on.

Bhanu: 14:50

Just, you're rel being again. Like I felt, like I'm like a precious baby to my friends, like you know, where they treat me with so much love and somewhere I'm missing it from when my mom passed away. So now reconnecting with the friends, like you know, I felt like, yeah, this is me again, bubbly Banu, like you know, that's, that's me. Um, yeah, it's been rough two and half years for sure.

Priyanka: 15:15

Yeah, so much time to you, bhanu, and thank you. That's an incredible journey, um. Thank you for sharing your story. Okay, so, before we wrap up, um, I would like you to give some advice to our audience, who's probably going through some mental challenges, or even watching this, as you know, for knowledge as well. So what's your advice?

Bhanu: 15:37

um, definitely acceptance. Um, and acceptance and agreeing that you're not okay. Um, so seek help, definitely seek help. There's no shame in it. Don't have fright to go and seek help. There's a lot of mental health awareness programs in australia and also there's a lot of helplines which they can help you out. Go to therapies where it's required, because you will know, like you will definitely know from your guts, that when you're going through that, you needed a support. So when you required a support, take it from a friend support system. Don't share it to everybody. Just know your people, definitely know your people. Make your support system stronger. Build your support system very strong, your inner circle very strong, so that they can help you to rebuild yourself. And yeah, as I said, like you know, there's a lot of help from everywhere.

Bhanu: 16:35

And just one advice to the people, like around the mental health issues they're going through, even though you don't know about them, or even though you don't know about mental health, just be kind. Just be kind. Just don't say anything or pass a comment or a judgment, because it might effort them so badly, because we are vulnerable, because back from our back of our minds so much is running, even though when you're healing. After two years, three years also, you, your mindset is still vulnerable. So understand, even though you don't understand the mental health issues, just be kind. Just be kind to the people around you, because mental health is not a matter of choice, it's a medical illness. So please understand that and be kind. That's definitely my one advice to the people and who are going through the mental health. And so it's okay, it's okay to be not okay, so just accept it and seek help where required, or talk to someone, or talk to yourself in the bathroom mirror or something you know. Just don't hold it.

Priyanka: 17:41

You did go through a lot. It was a big journey. You took the right steps and I really hope you completely recover and also your awareness thing that you're running. I'm hoping that a lot of people also gain help out of it. But thank you so much for attending our show. Thank you, thanks for inviting me.