Lez Say More Podcast
Welcome to Lez Say More: the podcast where your favorite duo of best friends—together for over 20 years—gets real about the queer community. Join us every Wednesday as we dive into everything from health and wellness, to fashion, relationships, sex - and even the occasional celebrity gossip. With our trademark humor and brutal honesty, we’re here to share stories, laughs, and insights about the (queer) modern life and all the fabulousness it has to offer. Whether you're part of the community or just curious, grab your favorite drink and join the conversation—because we promise to keep it funny, relatable, and absolutely unfiltered!
Lez Say More Podcast
Love, Identity, and Parenting: A Valentine's Day Special with Fernanda
Join us on this week's episode as Ava's wife Fernanda shares her transformative journey of coming out and becoming a mother at just 16, navigating the challenges of identity and co-parenting while fostering love in unique family dynamics. The episode delves into love, acceptance, and self-discovery, leaving listeners with powerful insights on belonging and authenticity.
• Fernanda discusses her early relationships and pregnancy
• The complexities of coming out to family and friends
• Balancing motherhood with exploring one’s identity
• Support systems: The role of partners in parenting
• Engaging fun segments highlighting love and relationships
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Well, first of all I had a girlfriend and a boyfriend and then I found out I was pregnant and I had to tell my girlfriend like we got to break up because now I don't know I'm about to be pregnant, like do you want to be my girlfriend still? And she was like wait, what? Yeah?
Speaker 2:Okay, rewind. Yeah. Hey guys, welcome back to the let's Say More podcast. I am Solange, I'm Ava and today we have a very special guest Dun-dun-dun, dun-dun-dun. We have the infamous Fernanda. Fernanda. Round of applause. Hi guys, fernanda is here today to chit-chat a little bit with us about her coming out story, what it was like for her, and coming out with a baby, because she came out at a really young age and she had a baby at a really young age. So we're going to talk a little bit with her about that and we're also going to play a couple of games with her and we're going to do a fun newlywed game that I put together.
Speaker 2:So neither one of you know what questions are going to be. Oh man, it's a setup. Because, technically, next week is Valentine's Day. We shoot this a little bit before that. But because next week is technically Valentine's Day, I thought we would do a little cute newlywed game and ask you some questions that are a little bit more on the romantic side.
Speaker 3:All right, don't embarrass me with the questions.
Speaker 2:Let's get started. We are going to start with. Tell us a little bit about you, fernie. So how old were you when you first had Mel?
Speaker 1:Oh wow, guess, Really quick Guess. So you know a lot, I can't say anything. I won't say anything. So I'm going to guess really quick Guess I'm going to guess.
Speaker 3:So you know a lot. I know I can't say anything, so I'm going to. I mean, how young do you think, since you always say, this is all new information to me.
Speaker 2:So I'm going to guess that you were like 16.
Speaker 1:You're on the money. I was literally 16.
Speaker 3:We should buy a lotto ticket today. We should buy a by a lot of people.
Speaker 2:All right, so you were 16 and oh, wow, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:So Honda's brain just went wait a minute.
Speaker 2:Oh man, and how old were you when you came out? Well, shoot, I was Like four Stupid.
Speaker 1:Well, first of all I had a girlfriend and a boyfriend and then I found out I was pregnant and I had to tell my girlfriend, like got to break up because now I don't know I'm about to be pregnant. Like do you want to be my girlfriend still? And she was like wait, what, what?
Speaker 2:yeah, okay, rewind. Yeah okay, so you were dating biggest, the biggest player.
Speaker 1:Pimp over here, okay so you were dating a guy?
Speaker 2:yeah, and you were dating a girl in high school. Did they know about each other?
Speaker 1:yeah, we hung out, we split our time.
Speaker 3:It was a throuple. It was a throuple, you are the OG. Throuple Right, someone talk shit about me being a throuple. You're right, boo, I take it all back. I didn't know I was married to the queen of throuples.
Speaker 1:Oh my God. No, he was my boyfriend and she was my girlfriend. We weren't each other's couples, it was like I had each, so you were the kingpin. That's what they're called.
Speaker 3:I'm done, jeez, what did I get myself into?
Speaker 2:So you were dating. Okay, how long were you dating with the guy before you?
Speaker 1:got pregnant. Ugh, I'm embarrassed. Eight months or such like that, Like not even a year.
Speaker 2:Okay, so you were dating him on and off, or you guys were pretty consistently together.
Speaker 1:No, we were in the whole like we were the whole.
Speaker 3:That was her man. That was her man.
Speaker 2:That was her man Was that the first guy that you were with, or were you?
Speaker 1:with other guys before that? No, okay, were with, or were you with, other guys before that? No, okay, definitely had other boyfriends before that. Other boyfriends before that yeah, okay, okay. And girlfriends before that oh, okay.
Speaker 3:She always likes to say that, like if you talk about Fernanda's dating life and you say like, oh, like you've had boyfriends or whatever she loves to have, she says yeah, but I also had a bunch of girlfriends.
Speaker 2:Yeah, friends like okay, so can I?
Speaker 1:ask you what for them what what do you?
Speaker 2:what would you say? You identify as, if you identify as anything like bisexual. I'm a full lesbian, okay, proud lesbo, proud lesbo do you find men attractive?
Speaker 1:yeah, I can look at some of them and be like, yeah, he's handsome, okay.
Speaker 2:Okay, I was curious yeah, so you were 16 when you had Mel. How old were you when you came out to your family?
Speaker 1:Oh my God, my mom probably had the biggest shock because I was what? I was mad young. I was like 18, 17. Oh, okay, and really it was because she was my best friend and like I hung out with her my whole life, like all through middle school and then into high school and out of high school and stuff like that. So I was always around, my friend, and then we ended up dating. So she was like my childhood friend and then we ended up being a couple and my mom was like you bitches, like you know, like I can't believe you guys did this all under my face, kind of thing. But it wasn't always like that. We were literally best friends, which is the other thing, like all my ex-girlfriends or friends, but they weren't always gay. I was like, don't turn them gay, kind of thing or like the flipper, she's the aggressor.
Speaker 2:She was the flipper but you know, my people always think that the femmes are not.
Speaker 3:Right, they always think that.
Speaker 1:To my defense. I now realize that I didn't love all those girls. It was more like they were my friends, that I wanted to be with them all the time, so it was like we might as well just date, Tell us tell the audience and Solange the story about that.
Speaker 3:Your mom likes to tell, about you having sleepovers and what she thought was going on. But what was really going on on these?
Speaker 1:sleepovers that you well, everyone thinks like you're never gonna be into a girl, right as a girl. So my mom would be like, yeah, no, your boyfriends could sleep over, but like, your girlfriends can come and hang out and you guys have sleepovers and like whatever.
Speaker 1:Well, my mom didn't realize that I was bisexual because I always had a boyfriend and then my girlfriends. Obviously they couldn't be out in public about it, so we weren't like holding hands or anything like that everywhere in front of my mom. So she'd be like you can invite your girlfriend's sleepover and be like okay, cool, like no problem.
Speaker 1:You were like literally my girlfriend, literally mom, literally mom so she's like you had this all happening in my house and I had no fucking idea because you were. You had a whole ass boyfriend too and I'd be like, yeah, sorry about it. Like until one day she was like I knew kind of something was going on with you when you brought me a ponytail lesbian and I was like she was cute you have to explain to the viewers what a ponytail has been.
Speaker 2:I think I know because I was one of them.
Speaker 1:Sleek ponytail white tee pants basic outfit.
Speaker 2:Oh, I didn't have the white tee, but I did have the ponytail.
Speaker 1:Or like a basic t-shirt, like a solid shirt, okay, okay.
Speaker 2:So you would say you were about 17 or 18 when you came out to your mom. Your mom was definitely not shocked I definitely think she was shocked.
Speaker 1:She was like you're not allowed to come to my house anymore. You guys could no longer be friends like it was like a cut off for her. She was like you're not allowed in my house anymore. So she was not okay with it no okay, she was like you have a baby, like you get your shit together. What are you talking about? You like girls now.
Speaker 2:Did you continue to have a relationship with baby daddy after?
Speaker 1:you had Mel. Yeah, we were trying to co-parent. We did the whole like live together. I went to his house, he went to my house, but in reality, the problem of why we didn't last was because, one, we were mad young. Two, women just mature better and like get their yeah, they se ponen las pilas better, you know, in short. And yeah, he was like a whole bag. So he was like sleeping with other girls while I was pregnant and I was like I hate you how long were you guys together after you had Mel Like?
Speaker 2:at what point did you?
Speaker 1:Well, well, we weren't really in a relationship after that. We were just like trying to do like better with each other to raise melanie, we weren't like committed to each other anymore because we had already broke that trust. So it was like, all right, we have a baby, like let's figure this out.
Speaker 2:So, while you were pregnant, you already knew that you liked women. You were having a relationship with, with a, with a woman that was your friend, so how did she take it when she found out that you were pregnant with?
Speaker 1:his baby. She was just like why didn't you tell me we're friends still?
Speaker 2:And I was like I don't know how to tell you this and she was okay with you dating a guy or just dating somebody else in general.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because, think about it, it's high school, so like she's into guys too, she's probably into relationships also Okay so you were both kind of doing the same thing, Mm-hmm oh okay.
Speaker 1:And then she got a boyfriend and at that point I already had Melanie and then he didn't like me because obviously maybe she told him that we had dated or whatever and he was fucking weird about it. Told him that we had dated or whatever, and he was fucking weird about it. I was like, okay, so it's weird, some men don't mind it and some men are like, all right, you could never talk to her again yeah, some men think it's like hot or something more, like they don't feel threatened by it.
Speaker 2:Or they think like, oh, it's fine, it's just another girl maybe.
Speaker 1:Maybe at some point I'll be able to join in yeah, right, and you're like yeah, no, it doesn't work that way no, it didn't, definitely didn't, and he never really asked that either, which I like respect, because he I think he was like all right, she's just doing this for fun and then.
Speaker 2:But see, that's the other misconception is that people they assume that you're doing it for fun, that it's not real right.
Speaker 1:Nothing's real for everybody sometimes.
Speaker 3:I don't think it was real for your friend. I think it was Experimental.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's why it's high school. Does it really count Really, you know?
Speaker 2:I mean it counts.
Speaker 1:It counts because Well, if you go down below, yeah, it counts. But some people are like I kissed a girl and like it took me a minute. It took me one minute to figure that one out like if you kiss a girl, you're not you can't say you're bisexual, you're just attracted to women, which woman isn't. You know what I mean. But if you full send like, I think you can say like I am descending.
Speaker 2:I am officially a lesbian.
Speaker 1:I just feel like you gotta do the work to count it as one, okay.
Speaker 3:It's my life, guys. That's a perspective.
Speaker 2:That's a perspective, folks, all right. So how did you come out to Mel? At what age was Mel when you came out to her? If you came out to her, like, how did you do that?
Speaker 1:I really didn't have to, thankfully, because, again, melanie was growing up with me. I was literally young. I had girls all around me all the time. I had sleepovers all the time. But it wasn't like that. It wasn't like the creepy way. You're trying to laugh at me. I'm not.
Speaker 2:It's like I always had my house friends.
Speaker 1:Like my friends, were always around us, uh-huh. So when I did date my friend that I told you that we ended up dating, she was like what I call a stem also, but like a stud almost in a way. She was like masculine in her vibe and her energy, like she didn't like to be girly, but she wore her hair up in a ponytail Like she still had hair on her hair that's a stem to you yeah, I think you're a stem no, I know a lot of studs that still wear their hair in a ponytail, but they don't have any feminine quality well, she wore cologne.
Speaker 3:You wear perfume so she's a stud well, she didn't have shaved head.
Speaker 1:Then she shaved her head. I don't think a stud. Well, she didn't have shaved head.
Speaker 2:Then she shaved her head. I don't think a stud is shaved head. I don't think a stud is shaved head. I think a stud is Mask. Yeah, like a mask, like you're masculine.
Speaker 3:But like more than a mask.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I mean, like you can have long hair and still be a stud. Yeah, identify as a stud. I know some I as a stem personally, because I do think I I kind of play the role of masculine feminine as well, like I am feminine a lot of things and I'm very masculine and a lot of things too. My fashion is both, but I do have short hair okay well, but I had long hair at one point too at that time she didn't identify as anything.
Speaker 1:She was just like I'm a girl, so she didn't want to sit there and say she was into lesbian she didn't say she didn't sit there and say that she was into only girls.
Speaker 1:She didn't sit there and say she liked boys. It was like she just liked me. Her and I had an understanding of our relationship. Like her mom we obviously both our moms they ended up knowing we liked each other because we were always hanging out. Then our conversation changed where it was like all we talked about was each other and like that's when my mom was kind of like no wonder, you kept talking about everything and you guys were always on the phone and blah, blah, blah. So she was my friend already. So I didn't have to introduce her to Mel because literally she knew me before when I was with her dad, before I was pregnant, and then when she was born she was already there. Yeah, was pregnant, and then when she was born, she was already there?
Speaker 2:yeah, but did mel ever ask like was? Was mel ever curious as to like, um, why, like, why are you with girls, or who are these? Like you know, like kids ask random questions sometimes especially when they go into school and they see I wasn't I was with ava that she started to ask questions. Yeah, okay, okay.
Speaker 1:Because, again, it was like my friends were always around me, so it was like you're a girl, it doesn't make anything different. Did we hold hands? Yeah, she knew what love was. She definitely saw that we were affectionate with each other, but we weren't making out or being weird or anything. I mean, I didn't feel comfortable with that either, you know, because she's a baby and like she doesn't need to see that If you were with a man or a woman, Well, if I was with her dad also, I wouldn't be doing all that, just because I wouldn't want her to feel like she can go.
Speaker 1:You know, babies kiss everybody. I was very like don't kiss my kid. You know, like I didn't want people thinking you could just give love like that to everybody by kissing everyone, Like no, no, no, Keep your hands to yourself, and shit like that. Okay.
Speaker 2:You can't do that. Okay, so you know. So you came out to Mel, or? Well, mel started asking questions when she met Ava. How soon after you were dating Ava did Mel meet Ava?
Speaker 1:well. So Mel and Ava met as friends already because she came to my house on a neutral like base, like you just came over my house, it wasn't like an introduction, and then again Melanie was always around. So when Ava and I started becoming official is when I want to say like we started just dating for like, because we kind of dated for like a whole year like off and on, off and on yeah, because we were supposed to just be a yeah, we didn't want anything with each other, okay and then it it turned into more marriage.
Speaker 2:Now, here we are how soon do you think it is appropriate to introduce your child to a person that you're dating?
Speaker 1:I definitely feel like when you're as young as you, like I was, I really didn't think I was going to be serious. So it was like she and I are hanging out like she's another friend. So I didn't introduce Melanie as my girlfriend Again. It wasn't until we were like all right, we're about to become official. That was like a year later. At that point Melanie had already been hanging out with her because we're at the park, we're at lunch, we're at the movies, you know, we're everywhere. So it wasn't like an introduction.
Speaker 2:What was Mel's first impression of Ava?
Speaker 1:She liked her. She has a good spirit. She's fun.
Speaker 3:She's spirit, she, she's fun, she's kid like. I'm like a kid, very much kid like. Are you guys calling me immature? I don't know how to take this right now.
Speaker 1:I'm kidding I'm kidding, no, but if she was like she wouldn't be here you know what I mean, because my kid is definitely top, top before anybody this is true, so when did?
Speaker 2:you know ava would have been, would be a good stepmom. I still don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 3:Just kidding. She's lying, that is so. That is the biggest lie she could ever tell. I know that Too late now, oh well, oh well, she's already Should have thought of that before you said yes, right. Right.
Speaker 1:No Shoot, I don't know. I'm really bad at this because I feel like Ava would have shown me she wasn't around. Look, if she was to be, like, this is too much for you. Then you got to go because my life is definitely Mel and mom and you come second. You need to know that, and it was hard for some people to understand that and sometimes it would be hard for her, but yeah, that was the thing. So either you were going to be on game or you were going to get out of the game.
Speaker 2:Was there like a moment where you felt like, okay, this person is more of like somebody I would want to raise my child with, rather than you know the previous relationships?
Speaker 1:Okay. So I think really it came down to me thinking like stability, like is she going to be like willing to be like a family, or is she going to want to just be my girlfriend, because there's nothing wrong with that?
Speaker 1:But then I'd have to have known like, okay, maybe we won't be together forever kind of thing, but I think it helped that Ava was always like oh, how can I help you, like do you need me to do anything? And then she'd see me stress out a bit and be like, oh, I can take her here if you need me to, or I could drop you off and then take her here, or we'll go to the park while you go do this and I'd be like, oh, thanks. So I think that really helped me a lot, knowing that like she wanted to be there with Melanie also and, um, yeah, it kind of opened my eyes because I was like yeah, like you said, in the last episode she went from like a whole bachelor to like wanting to be a mom.
Speaker 1:I didn't want to take that from her because I feel like it's kind of hard to put that on people yeah so when she naturally was like willing to do that, I was like that's kind of sweet, I like that a little sweet, andhmm, mm-hmm, a little sweet, and then her mom had a daycare so it kind of helped that she was good with kids already she came prepared.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, that's true, I did come prepared, but Mel was also. We just clicked. But I do click with all children, but Mel and I just had a special bond. And then, yeah, I would give Fernanda the car sometimes so she could go do things, because I hated seeing Fernanda struggle. I wanted to always make life easy for Fern. You know I'm the reason she got her driver's license.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Because she was driving my car without a license.
Speaker 1:I was riding dirty?
Speaker 3:Absolutely not.
Speaker 2:I did that once with an ex.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you did, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:Not the good ex either. Oh God, I mean if they're exes, are they ever good? I mean like the jailbird ex oh, oh, you, I shouldn't have let her borrow my car. No, you shouldn't have. Oh, she could have.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:So you would show up for her and try to help her as much as you could. And try to help her as much as you could, yeah.
Speaker 3:As a parent. Yeah, because I knew from early on how important Melanie was to Fernanda. It still is, but was to Fernanda and I also. I have a really soft heart, like I, my mom, my mom will tell you anyone that knows me knows that I am such a giving person. So if I see, if I care about you and I see that I can make your life a little easier, I'm going to do that and that's what I've done, you know, with Fernanda and with Mel.
Speaker 3:You know Fernanda was working at the mall and she was like take the bus. And I was like you don't need to take the bus, I could take you or I could pick you up or you could borrow my car and I'll help you. With Mel and I did a lot of things that I don't know where it came from, because it was just so natural for me to do it, and then it allowed Mel and I to create this bond together and then it allowed her to see that, like, mel's safe with me. Because, as a single mom, I'm sure one of the main things that they focus on is like, is my child safe with this person, whether it's a friend or a partner? And I wanted her to know, like Mel's fine yeah.
Speaker 2:You know. So for you, fern, is, how did you feel knowing that there was somebody who wanted to help you and wanted to show up for you and for your kid? Because I know personally, I know that you have a lot of uh, I guess I would call them hiccups with? Obviously, we all have a past and we all have traumas of childhood and all of that. So I know that for you, trusting somebody else was very difficult, especially somebody that is coming in and wants to help you with your child. Yeah, and I know that that was a big milestone for you to take a step forward and be like I'm going to trust you not only with my heart but with my child's heart. So, like, at what point did you realize, okay, this is somebody whom I want to, because I know you said that first she was just a booty call.
Speaker 2:Like at what point? Was there a moment in time that you can remember, or was there like a specific thing that happened where you were like, okay, can trust her, I can see myself with her. I actually want to marry her.
Speaker 1:I don't think the marry part came for a long time, for a long time, yeah, yeah um, yeah, I feel like that first year of trial was like a lot of it, because thankfully I know that I had like a lot of hiccups also, like stability and shit like that. Um, I had people who actually wanted to help me because they saw what a good mother I was and like how hard I was working. I was like working two jobs. I was like doing extra shit on the side, like just trying to be like on top of my shit to kind of give my kid a good life. And then also people who understood my, my, my situation were like I know that you're not a bad person, like this is just a bad card. You were dealt. So they were like let me help you, you can do this, you can go to school, I'll watch her for you like.
Speaker 1:I have a friend whose mom literally like was like became my second mom because she was like you got too much time on your hands. I'm raising your rent if you don't go and do something with your life. I was like I can't afford anything else. She was the one who forced me to go to school. That was helpful. Then Ava definitely helped in that time too, because she was around that time. I was like what the hell do I do?
Speaker 1:You were entertaining dental school at one point.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was about to be cleaning teeth all year, Ooh we could have used a dentist, even though I don't mind getting my grays done, so I'm good.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we don't mind the hair.
Speaker 2:We don't mind the hair.
Speaker 3:I'm thankful for the hair part.
Speaker 2:As long as there's a service that we benefit from we're good, we're good yeah thank god you're not working in an office because we couldn't benefit from that.
Speaker 1:No, we can't benefit from that, yeah. So I think that was helpful too, because she'd be like okay, I'm gonna pick you up from school, I'll go pick up melanie from school and then we'll come get you and then we'll go eat lunch and I'd be like, okay, cool. So it was like again like comfort. Yeah, she kind of showed that and then melanie was really comfortable, her shoot melanie's very affectionate too, and so she'll like they give each other love and stuff. And I'd be like, okay, you guys, you guys are good. And she didn't give me no weird vibes because she wouldn't have lasted half a year or a year either.
Speaker 1:Um, but overall I think just the fact that she was like all right, mel's a focus, mel's a focus, mel's a focus I was like we're on the same page here, all right, cool, like I like this. Because my ex-partner was like we need to get married and I'm like you're doing too much, like I'm not about to do all that, just because I want you to be like a part of my life. She was already a part of my life, but she wanted more like stupid, like she wanted to be like what is it? What is called committed a full send and before she could be like all right, we're gonna do all this.
Speaker 2:How long were you with that partner for?
Speaker 1:For like a year and a half, okay.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then was that partner also like very helpful and close, and all of that with Mel.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she was my best friend 12 years before we started dating. So she was always around my house, yeah, and helped her flirt with girls on her phone and shit like that. Okay, we were best friends so it wasn't weird, okay. And then after that, obviously Mel, she was my friend and then we started dating and Mel saw that it was love, so she'd be like, oh, give each other a hug, hold hands, whatever Same stuff she did with Av. And it was just more permanent with Av, because obviously we ended up being together longer and then moving in with each other and we started off with roommate and then we was like, oh my god, we're gonna live with just us.
Speaker 2:Like that's crazy so at what point did Mel start asking questions?
Speaker 1:she really, thankfully, didn't have to ask. I think she just saw it for what it was, like she never asked who's Ava Like why do you guys sleep in the same room? Well, she, asked and I'd be like that's my girlfriend, and she'd be like, okay, and then that was it.
Speaker 2:Would she say like what's a girlfriend?
Speaker 1:Well, I just no, I don't think she did. I don't think I ever had to sit there and be like this is what it is, like she just saw it for what it was.
Speaker 2:She just saw love and that's all she knew and from that point on it was on Because now she's 13. Yeah, so she's at an age now where, like things are obviously very clear I know she starts high school next.
Speaker 3:In September.
Speaker 2:This year Holy smokes.
Speaker 3:She doesn't like us to kiss in front of her. Now she says that we're being weird.
Speaker 2:Oh, but I think that's any. No, that's okay, that's any kid.
Speaker 3:But she does like to see us like if we're on the couch and we're cuddled up, she comes out of her, oh so cute, you guys are so cute.
Speaker 2:She likes that Like in an obnoxious way, or like she likes to see.
Speaker 3:Fernanda and I uh, have love. Have love for each other no, I know.
Speaker 2:I know because I've been there, yeah I like when you guys fight, she's just like. I don't like it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I don't like it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, like she likes the love yeah, so when did you know you wanted to marry opa?
Speaker 1:when she gave me the ultimatum, she said that's it.
Speaker 3:I said I'm not gonna be a girlfriend forever, so so the previous girl said we got to get married. And she booked it.
Speaker 2:I said absolutely not. And then the next one said we got to get married and you gave in.
Speaker 3:I said I'm not going to be a girlfriend for the rest of my life.
Speaker 1:I said you've been doing good stuff for 10 years. You could do it a little longer.
Speaker 2:You could do another 10,. Baby, you're doing great, sweetie.
Speaker 3:You're doing great, sweetie.
Speaker 2:And Ava was like hell. No.
Speaker 1:Yeah, unfortunately, she was like I need something permanent and I was like damn, I'm a cancer.
Speaker 3:We need that stability, we need to know you're not going anywhere. I mean, yes, there is divorce, but with marriage comes, like it's known, you know you have to put in the work. In a marriage, in a girlfriend sort of relationship, you know you could, you could get away with like, ah, not today, and yeah, in marriage can you say you want space and not today, yeah, of course you can. But you know, ultimately you're going to have to work it out.
Speaker 2:Yes and no, yes and no matters. But I do see the other side of it where, if you are married like legally bound and married, yes, the escaping that relationship makes it much harder, because now you have to go through all these hurdles and all these legal things right to like separate, uh. But I think that if you wanted out of the relationship, whether you were married or not, that's still there, like you still have an option to be out of it. Yeah, but the whole point is that you made a commitment, whether you signed a paper or not, but the commitment is to be in this forever with one another and to get through the thick and thin and no matter what you are like, your ride or dies, and I think that is more important than any paper. But I understand that for you it was an act of like, showing you that she's committed to you and that you have more of a say in.
Speaker 3:I have a family now, yeah, and that's what I wanted is, I love my little family. You know, they're everything to me. The two of them are the reason I work as hard as I work and that I grind the way that I do. If I didn't have a family, if I didn't have that, then I'd be working for myself and I've done that before and I become this reckless person that's out every single night of you know, the week yeah.
Speaker 3:And I'm just out there with no purpose, right? So like they give me purpose and it's, it feels good to have to have that feel, it feels good during holidays to have the both of them and we have each other and I. I love that more than anything. Are you ready to have the both of them and we have each other and I and I? I love that more than anything. Hmm.
Speaker 2:Are you ready to have another baby? Yeah, I want Mel to have sibling, a sibling.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Siblings. If we have twins, God willing, I don't care Um so you'd be open and willing to do it. Open and willing to do it all over again. Yeah, open and willing to do it all over again.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm young. What the hell, why not?
Speaker 2:that's what I like to hear what's? What's it like now that you said you're young? What's it like dating somebody who's older?
Speaker 1:it's not that bad when she's like I don't tries to keep up with me, I'm just kidding, let's keep it real. Yeah, I'm the old one. I'm like, oh my god, you want to do. But I'm like the thriller, like take me to the amusement park, take, let's jump out of a plane, let's go hiking, let's go camping. And she's like take me to the club, let's go get bottle service. And I'm like, oh my God, I can only do this for so long.
Speaker 3:Take me to the beach, the playa. I want to party on the beach. I'm not staying in a tent, I don't camp oh.
Speaker 2:God, I'm not that kind of lesbian. I want a cabin. Put me in a cabin. I need a toilet that works, yeah, and I need a shower. I need a shower and I don't need critters. Yes, and a bed, a mattress, yes, yes, yes, I need a mattress.
Speaker 3:So I'm down. I told her set me whatever you want. I did the tent thing one time. That's all it took for me to never want to do it again. I did it one time with my friends and it was a lot of fun. We went to Catalina and we did it on a beach and it was a lot of fun. But if we're going camping where a bear can come, or any other creature. I'm not doing it.
Speaker 1:Just get a pot and rattle it. They're scared of noise? No, you see.
Speaker 3:It'll be my luck to have them not scared of noise. They might be deaf. No, I might get a deaf bear and he doesn't hear it.
Speaker 2:And here he comes after me, or the bear just wants to cuddle with Ava.
Speaker 1:Right, no, thank you. You know that was one of the things I told her, like before we got married, I was like we got to start doing things I want to do.
Speaker 3:And I said okay.
Speaker 1:And we haven't done it yet.
Speaker 2:So what's something you want to do, let's put it out there. It's going to get done this year.
Speaker 1:Bucket list A Lava and Fernanda's bucket list for 2025. What do you want to do? So give me three. I want to go snorkeling like deep diving, oh, like deep sea diving, yeah yeah, yeah, like with the sharks.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like that I don't do that either, hell. No, our life insurance doesn't cover all some of these things. Like you can't, go put yourself in that situation, then you die, and then you get life insurance Like you can't go, put yourself in that situation, then you die and then you get life insurance.
Speaker 2:You're going to go missing pretty soon.
Speaker 1:Yeah, all right, maybe you don't have to go, I'll just go.
Speaker 2:No, I don't even want you. No, we're agreeing to one of these. So give us three and then we'll agree to two.
Speaker 1:I want a dog. Okay, that's like not an adventure thing, but it was like I always grew up with a dog. I had Dalmatians, I had boxers, I had shit shoes, I had shit shoes, shit shoes, shit shoes. English isn't her first language. What are they called Shit shoes?
Speaker 3:That's what I said.
Speaker 2:We're going to have to have subtitles for this episode. I had shit shoes because you know I'm from the hood. That was the kind of dog I had.
Speaker 1:I should too. Okay, all right, what else? What's the third thing?
Speaker 3:Make it good yeah like camping, camping.
Speaker 1:I want to be in nature more. Which one do you want? Camping?
Speaker 3:Sign me up for that. Get your cousins Natalia I know she watches Set up camping.
Speaker 2:She wants to go glamping. When you go glamping one of the activities is snorkeling and you take your dog.
Speaker 3:Okay listen.
Speaker 2:Boom, you knocked all three of them.
Speaker 3:The snorkeling in the deep sea is not happening. I did that actually. I went to Hawaii. You're not helping me with my case.
Speaker 2:I went kayaking into the middle of the ocean and you jump off of the kayak and then you go in a group of people because you don't want to be by yourself, because that's when the dun-dun-dun-dun short comes. So you go in the middle of the ocean with our crazy guide who reminded me of oh my God, what's that actor's name? He's like 51st Dates and he's always the crazy.
Speaker 2:But the crazy friend yeah, I know, I know who you're talking about, with the with the weird eye. Always that's what he reminded me of bob shine. Yeah, yeah, yeah him so we went out into the middle of the water like open ocean, not just like in the open ocean with jackie.
Speaker 2:Actually she was I already, I'm aborting it and you just jump out and you have the little snorkel and you look at the little fish and it's all pretty pretty. And then you're like okay, I'm done. How long are you out there for? And we were out in the water for maybe, I don't know, maybe like 15 minutes. That's enough for a shark to come, and then and then. But when you're in a crowd, you're less, it's more to eat.
Speaker 3:It's more to eat. It's more to eat. He's going to bring his homie and his homie. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You guys have it no.
Speaker 2:I'm terrified of sharks. If there are three things I'm terrified of, it's open water. So sharks, anything that lives in the ocean.
Speaker 3:So you did all that.
Speaker 2:Snakes. There's no way in hell I'm going to like be anywhere near snakes and like giant spiders. No thank you so camping is out, and then heights no. Like you're not going to get me.
Speaker 3:She got me to do I don't do heights. She got me on a zip line. She got me to go bungee things.
Speaker 1:Right, I got you in the middle of the ocean. You freaked out, remember? Yeah, because I was such a fat ass and I couldn't.
Speaker 3:She's like help me. I'm like how I couldn't get back on the jet. This is when I was like big, here I am, like I couldn't get back and I was having a panic attack because I thought, any, oh, I'm going to eat that little prosciutto. So like yeah, I freaked out. I had a freak out moment.
Speaker 1:She's like babe, we were in Calvo. I'm like how I almost cried.
Speaker 2:Fernanda's, like all underwater. I'm like, oh my God.
Speaker 1:And then she didn't get back off and I had to jump off and do it again just to be like babe, look, nothing's happening. That is funny.
Speaker 3:Well, we're going to the Dominicans. We could do like. You could do snorkeling there we went snorkeling in Hawaii Barely Because your ring fell off.
Speaker 2:Right, that didn't count. Okay, so we could do.
Speaker 3:I'm down to do something like that in the Dominican. The Dominican, I'll set that up, but I'm not going. Listen, you can't have it all. I can't go deep sea diving like a scuba suit. You can go see the aliens that live in the ocean. Listen, solange, if you keep giving her ideas, if you keep giving her ideas.
Speaker 1:You gotta get your lungs together then for that, and I don't have strong lungs, okay, thank God.
Speaker 2:No, you use a thing, oh, okay.
Speaker 3:Sorry, we'll go scuba diving in the Dominican. So does that mean we don't have to go camping, because out of the three I pick one?
Speaker 1:I'm not doing these, listen. The thing was you become more adventurous. That was a part of the plan. That was in the contract, the invisible contract, we signed.
Speaker 3:We did.
Speaker 1:Yeah and the dog, the dog is coming. We, we signed, we did, yeah and the dog, the dog is coming.
Speaker 3:We're getting a duplex. Oh, oh, listen, we'll do the snorkeling in April, okay, because that's when we're going, and then we'll do the camping. Her cousin I'm looking at you, she's looking at you she's going to set it up. We'll go camping. That's two things, two out of the three.
Speaker 2:Then a dog can come when we get a house. Okay, so this has to happen this year. Yeah, the two things, the two things, those are on the bucket list. We will reconvene at the end of the year and make sure those two things have happened. Fine, not a problem, because now this is out in the ether.
Speaker 1:It's out there.
Speaker 2:We got witnesses.
Speaker 3:We got something to reference to, no problem guys, that's what we'll do.
Speaker 2:All right, I know you got your own set of questions. You want to ask. Yeah, for the most part, the rest is we'll play a little game and I got some other questions.
Speaker 3:All right.
Speaker 1:How was it to date someone from a different culture than yours? Oh, I liked it actually, because I love all the food. I don't discriminate against food, so I eat everything. This is true, yeah, and I was like teach me something, teach me about your culture. Take me to your mother's house. I'm good with moms.
Speaker 2:How did your mom react when she met Fern?
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's for you to answer.
Speaker 2:Because I think that was the first time you introduced somebody to your parents, right?
Speaker 3:Yeah, at first, fern, until this day, is my friend, according to my mom.
Speaker 1:Even though we got married in front of her.
Speaker 3:Yeah but Fern. My mom loves Fernanda, she loves her. She gives her a lot of love, a lot of affection. Fernanda really makes an effort with my mom, like that for sure is like her mother-in-law that she loves, like she knows she can go over whenever she wants to. She calls her. My mom answers you know she's. She's known Meli since she was little too, right. Yeah, she's known mel, because mel would come over I'd watch mel. My mom at first was like whose kid is?
Speaker 2:this baby, is this? Yeah, whose baby did you steal? It's just my friends yeah, I didn't know what does she can. Does she like create a bond with mel and a connection with mel since she was little or no?
Speaker 3:no, it probably. I would say maybe it got more serious, maybe six years ago, okay, you know, and my mom like always make sure to buy her presents for her birthday, for Christmas, whatever Mel wants. Every time she sees Mel she gives Mel a lot of love, mel loves her, she loves her, she loves going there. If I say my mom's cooking, she's having us over. Mel, yes, let's go.
Speaker 2:Does Mel have a name for her?
Speaker 3:Everyone calls my mom Nahi June. Oh, okay, so that's what everyone calls her. Like my mom. Yeah, that's what she prefers to be called. Yeah, even my niece. My niece doesn't call her grandma, she calls her Nahi June.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my mom was like you, don't call me grandma.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Even to my nieces and nephews. She was always like I'm mommy, yeah.
Speaker 3:Mami de la mami, that's cute Mom of mom, of mom, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's what we call my grandma too.
Speaker 1:Mami de la mami. How cute. Yeah, I like when we were finally allowed to go to Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:That's like when your mom was like all right, Because we weren't allowed to go there. We were allowed to go every other day of the week. It was like holidays. We weren't allowed to go there.
Speaker 3:It wasn't that you weren't allowed. It was that my mom didn't know how to tell the rest of my family that this is Ava's girlfriend, and then my aunt who was at the wedding. She was like we all know already. And then everybody met Fernanda and they just like, loved her. It's easy to Fernanda. Fernanda is easy to to like or to love because she is, she's really nice. How was it for you to introduce me as your girlfriend, to like your, your mom, your grandmother, your dad?
Speaker 1:so I feel like with my mom she was kind of like you know our gap. She was like girl, this is my homegirl, like this she could be my homegirl. What are you doing here dating her and I'd be like you're all and not hanging out like this is my girlfriend, like you guys are not hanging out like that I'm fine, this is true and then, yeah, my mom was kind of like all right, whatever.
Speaker 1:She probably thought it was like another relationship that I was going to get in and get out of, because I wasn't like big on committing. I was very like if people got on my nerves I'd be like all right, I'm done.
Speaker 3:Like I don't want to be here anymore.
Speaker 1:So my mom was like okay, I would say she was pretty open and accepting. She was like I've always. I don't want to say that I was a rebel kid, but I was like I really didn't care about what people said or thought or did or whatever. I was just very like this is my life. I'm going to show you my friends. I'm going to show you my girlfriend. Show you my like I wasn't embarrassed about anything. Show you my like I wasn't embarrassed about anything. Um, my grandma she, on the other hand, she used to judge me a little bit on my like posts and stuff. She'd be like, like how good of a kid you were, like why are you posting this or why are you doing this? And I'd be like okay, I gotta block you, like I can't show you certain things on my profile. That's when I was younger. Now she was more like okay, hi, no, hi. She didn't pay no mind to her, but she acknowledged her at least.
Speaker 3:Yeah, she didn't really pay a lot of mind.
Speaker 2:I was intimidated by her Is this your mom's mom or your grandma, my dad's Dad?
Speaker 3:okay, yeah, no, her grandma I was intimidated by. She finally turned the corner. I would say maybe four or five years ago. She started to become more comfortable with me because, like I tried with her, like, even though I knew she wasn't accepting of me, I still like showed her my heart, like showed her how nice I was and then she fell from, she fell into my charm yeah, I was very charming I am very charming, my dad my dad.
Speaker 1:He was kind of like well, he was out of my life for a little bit because he was like incarcerated and stuff. So I've always been daddy's girls too, so I feel like he was. He missed so much of my life that he was like he didn't want to put anything back. So when he found out I was pregnant, oh my god, he cried. He felt Melanie's kick for the first time. He saw me pregnant and that was like a whole thing. My dad's a cry baby so he's a little cancer too and, um, he's emotional and he's all love.
Speaker 1:So he was more like I don't care, like you could like her, you could like him, I really don't care, as long as they eat whoever makes you happy. And I was just like okay, perfect, thanks. Like fresh breath, fresher. Because I was scared of him mostly because I was like you know, he's latino machistos and all that they. Probably he didn't really like melanie's dad because the fact that he you know he's Latino machistos and all that they. Probably he didn't really like Melanie's dad because the fact that he you know, we were young.
Speaker 1:I remember he was like when he was getting married I was like I'm not marrying him, like tripping. Because that's culture, like yeah, you have a baby, you're gonna get married, you're gonna commit, you're gonna build a family, you're gonna take care of your responsibilities. But my dad, he was open to it. He was not like pushing back on anything, he was just like as long as she keeps you happy, then I'm happy, and if she doesn't, then you know, that's when we have a problem and she don't she doesn't do that no, he told me I needed a backbone in order to get his daughter go missing yeah, he, just he knew I wasn't, he knew that I had.
Speaker 3:He was worried about me dealing with his daughter. He was like you want to date her, you better get a backbone. And the minute I got a backbone she was like hold on, I don't really. Both her parents told me you need a backbone, like ava, you're too soft. So then I was like they're right. And then I got a backbone.
Speaker 1:She's like no, like don't be brand new, I don't like this. I was like yeah, I liked you for a reason um, all right, what?
Speaker 1:what makes you so free-spirited, so carefree, so, as you would say, like not rebellious, but yeah, like that, I don't care, yeah, attitude honestly, I really I don't know what pins the point, but from as long as I can remember, I was always just like in my own world, doing my own thing, and like a reckless kid like my tias and my tios would be like come over here, like just come in or don't do that, and I think it just made me more like, well, I'm gonna get in trouble, or I'm gonna be bored, like, or I'm gonna get in trouble and I'm not gonna have fun, so, or I'm gonna get in trouble regardless. So what the heck? I might as well just do what I want okay, all right.
Speaker 3:What advice do you have for people who can't be as open and free as you are?
Speaker 1:I don't know. I think just being true to yourself is important. Like, at the end of the day, we're all coming here by ourselves and we're all leaving by ourselves, and I think that our life could be what we want it to be, and if we put too many limits and fears in it, like, you're never going to be completely happy. Um, so I think just being true to yourself and not getting distracted by what other people are telling you or how to be and things like that, I think, overall, choosing yourself, that over anybody else, is gonna give you that like confidence to be like no, that's not what I want to do. I'm going to do this or this makes me happy, regardless of how it makes you feel. You know, yeah, like you had.
Speaker 2:I mean, you got pregnant at such a young age. Did you ever consider there would be any other option? Or did your parents tell you like, or your mother tell you like you have to have this baby? Did you have any other thought process in that moment, being so young?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was like I'm my mom's responsibility. Whatever she tells me to do, I'm going to do it. And then, by the time she found out, I was five months pregnant, so there wasn't really much options at that point. Hearing the heartbeat, seeing the body, seeing the fetus in your body and hearing it, and then going and doing an appointment, I just felt like that was too traumatizing for me. Why did it?
Speaker 2:take five months for her to find out she was hiding it. Well, I was in high school. I didn't know she was hiding it.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah she was hiding her pregnancy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I didn't know. You hid your pregnancy. What made you want to like not be so open about it?
Speaker 1:oh yeah, no, that's 16.
Speaker 1:I was literally like, worried, scared for my life, when I found out I was pregnant. I was like, and I was so not like, aware of, like worked like the insurance part of it. I thought that they would run my medical what is it called? Id, sin number and, like my mom would get an email or like a newsletter that I went to go take a visit to the doctor or something. So I avoided the doctors and I just took a pregnancy test and I was like I remember I was eating a carl's junior, the hawaiian burger, and I took a bite into it and it was like the bread, it was just not cute with the water in there with the pineapple.
Speaker 1:I immediately released and I was like, what, what's wrong? Yeah, my friend was like, bitch, you're pregnant're pregnant. And I was like, no, I'm not. She's like you need to take a test. And I was like, and so I did, and sure enough, it came up. And then she was like, oh, yeah, right away, you're pregnant. And I was like, what are you talking about? And then I was like to like, try to terminate, because we were both young, did he tell his parents?
Speaker 1:no, his mom found out at five months too. Oh so nobody knew other than you guys yeah, and your girlfriend no, my ex-girlfriend found out with my mom.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, yeah, nobody found out wrong I have a latin mom, so I can only imagine the fear that would go into telling your mother that you're pregnant, especially at 16, for God's sakes, she was a single mom of four, so it was like to add another mouth.
Speaker 3:I was like she was like oh no, not this, I got to run away.
Speaker 2:At what point did you find out that you were pregnant? At five months? No, at what point did you find out?
Speaker 1:that you were pregnant At five months. No, I found out immediately. Yeah, oh, okay, once I took the pregnancy test.
Speaker 2:Did you ever have the birds and bees? Talk, were you aware.
Speaker 1:No, to wrap it Well, yeah, but people don't do that when you're in a relationship all the time? No, I'm just curious.
Speaker 2:At such a young age. Like you know how much knowledge you had.
Speaker 1:I was very much informed. It was a bad mistake on my end and I take full responsibility because now my kid's a dope kid and I'm grateful she's here, of course, yeah.
Speaker 2:Of course she's the best.
Speaker 3:Yeah, how do you handle people questioning your sexuality? Because they look at you and you'll say like you're married, or at one point you would tell people like you have a girlfriend and I remember hearing them say like, but you have a kid.
Speaker 2:How do you how do you With a man?
Speaker 3:Yeah, how do you handle that?
Speaker 1:I feel like I hear it so often that I don't take offense to it, because it's like not everyone is aware of the fact that there's IVF out there nowadays. We're in 2025. Like if it was back in your guys' day. It's a little different.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, Grasp your pearls. Boo, Grasp your pearls. Should I just say that about? Her she just called us old back in your day. By the way, our day is not that far from your day.
Speaker 2:I don't know guys, you guys actually like well that's why I think I'm throwing in the with a guy part, because obviously you can have a child with a woman and still not be so shocked that you're a lesbian. But I think if you meet somebody who has a child and has had a child with a man, then most people will be like oh well, what do you mean? You're a lesbian.
Speaker 1:Well, now like well, not now, but ava, when she first met me with my ex-girlfriend, she thought me and my ex-girlfriend had Melanie together.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because we're from back in that day. Yeah, back in the day.
Speaker 1:But what you thought. I had IVF or something, or I adopted, I don't know I didn't think about how it happened.
Speaker 3:I just saw the two of you guys live together and I was like, oh, they have, because back in my day, 16 and pregnant wasn't common, right? So like, if people were pregnant, they were, they were in a relationship for a while and then they had a child Again. I think it was pretty common. Not in my group, oh not in.
Speaker 2:my day it was, but not in my group of friends right.
Speaker 3:In my group of friends or people that I knew that wasn't a thing, and so when I saw the two of you and I saw a child, I was like, oh, okay, and you guys seemed like you guys were a clique and I was like, oh, they had a kid together, they have a family. Mel is their child, so that's what I thought.
Speaker 1:Yeah, other than that, that when people say like oh well, because my grandma was like, but like she had a man like before and I was just like yeah, well, so I'm over that, like I don't really want it anymore, did you?
Speaker 2:ever feel like you should have continued dating men, to give mel that like male figure I don't think so.
Speaker 1:I didn't, so I know so I didn't. I didn't choose that route. Um, I could have went back and I never did. It wasn't like calling for me yeah, again, I'm not gonna live my life for anyone. You know how many families are broken, whether man and women are there. I was just like yeah, no, you already showed me you're not a good fit for us, so we're out of here. Yeah and um, basically, yeah, I feel like when it came to being asked that question, I'm just like well, I changed my mind, like simple form, that's part of her, I don't give up yeah, attitude and I really don't owe everyone an explanation at all times.
Speaker 2:So I'm just like think what you think. Yeah, the most beautiful thing is the male figure in Mel's life, because you have two brothers, but one of them is older than you and I know that he cares very much for Mel and he partakes in like taking care of her and all of that as well at times, and I think that he is a great representation of a male figure in her life.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he's her godfather yeah.
Speaker 2:While also an uncle. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:My younger brother too. He was very excited. He was so excited for her when she was born and also like even now they'll go and like have picnics or whatever, take her out, go to the movies, do things like that, or whatever, take her out, go to the movies, do things like that.
Speaker 1:Um, my aunt and uncle, I used to spend summers there, and so melanie also gets to do that now and so she's like he's like a father figure for her too, because he's very fun, he lets her be, he doesn't like try to like control her or anything like that, he just allows her to be and he just enjoys her presence, basically. And so she's like I love that, like yeah, and my dad now is trying to do that with her as much as he can Like, whether it's on the phone or when he sees her, like things like that. They all just try to show up. I feel like every man in my life, like in my side of the family, has definitely tried to be like Mel, like what's up? Where you at girl.
Speaker 2:Like you know, yeah, like, don't forget about us here, they're all going to show up with shotguns and mace and some stating.
Speaker 3:How do you feel when I discipline Mel?
Speaker 1:I hate it Because sometimes I'm like that's not how I would say it. But I had to step back and be like okay, I can't always be like mama bear, like mama beer, like I have to see it from another perspective. So I appreciate when you give it and I've learned to like shut my mouth, but it's hard to see, it's hard to see because I'm like, don't be talking to her.
Speaker 3:Crazy now you know, yes, it's hard for me to see it when you do it too. That's why I just stay in the office now, because I learned I think we've learned to like allow each other to discipline Mel rather than always save Mel, because, like when Mel was younger, we both wanted to save Mel, but now her little mouth sometimes she needs it. It's running, it's running. Last question Shoot. How did you feel when you saw Mel so emotional at our wedding?
Speaker 1:I was so happy for her.
Speaker 3:For her Because she wanted it at our wedding. I was so happy for her because I feel like I was happy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's literally had been like counting the days till the wedding and was like now we're like officially fam, like now we're like locked in and I'm like stuck like glue, like she would say when she was younger. I was really happy for her and everyone telling me that she was crying the whole time. I was just like she's not a one for a lot of words. She very much like shows her affection rather than express herself. I was really happy to know that, like she, like we fulfilled her like happiness there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so, because next week is Valentine's Day, I have a few questions. I want to ask you guys who is the most romantic one? What do you guys love most about each other?
Speaker 3:I love that she is as free spirited as she is. I love that she's pushed me to my adventurous levels, because I probably wouldn't be like that, and she's given me an extended family, like her entire family both sides her mom and her dad. They're huge. So she's given me a place and I think I've always said that, like Fernanda's given me a place in her life. That it just makes you feel good, like you belong.
Speaker 1:I love how caring and affectionate she is. That's like a huge part of why I liked her so much and like again to love her so much is that her heart is like she shows it all the time and I feel like the fact that she wants to be there and show her love and acts of services and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:I'm always like I see you, I see you do that for me, cause I'm a, I receive that way and, um, she's affectionate, so I try to be affectionate for her. We're going to play the newlywed game now.
Speaker 2:Oh God, I'm nervous. I'm going to ask you a question. You're going to write down your answers and then we're going to compare how many of these you guys get right. I'm so bad at these things, okay, so first question is who said I love you first? All right, fernanda, show us your answer I wrote it so small.
Speaker 1:Hold on, let me write it again you can say it too, because you know,
Speaker 2:some people listen.
Speaker 1:They don't all watch oh, you're right, they're missing out me. Me I said I love you. First what?
Speaker 2:do you have ava burn burn? Fernie said I love you first. Number two what does your partner think your most annoying habit is ava that I don't deep clean oh, that she doesn't deep clean. That's a good one, babe. That's a good one, fernando.
Speaker 1:No, no you're right on the money. I said she doesn't make the bed. That's a good one, babe. That's a good one, fernando. No, no, you're right on the money. I said she doesn't make the bed, so that's a part of cleaning Because you're already in it.
Speaker 3:You're still in it when I get up.
Speaker 1:But make your side, make your side. She's in the bed.
Speaker 2:So then I get out of bed and my side's made and hers is still like this If your partner could eat one food for the rest of their life, what would it be? Don't look.
Speaker 3:Oh, I know, I know what it is. I had to answer this in Mexico.
Speaker 1:Dilberno Okay Fern. Persian food yes.
Speaker 3:Sushi.
Speaker 1:Yep.
Speaker 2:Oh, that is true. She does every every time more like what do you want sushi, god? Okay, who is the better cook and what is their signature dish? Okay?
Speaker 3:as you could tell okay fern is the better cook, uh-huh, and her signature dish is the huevos rancheros, huevos, rancheros, huevos rancheros. I don't get it at any restaurant now that I've had hers.
Speaker 1:No, yeah, huevos rancheros. Yeah, that's what I agreed.
Speaker 2:Who takes longer to get ready in the morning? Without a doubt, without hesitation, I can answer this question for you. There you go, Soli Fernanda for a unanimous answer yes. If you two went on a spontaneous weekend trip, where would your partner want to go?
Speaker 1:spontaneous, like around the world, or no, just like like a random hey, let's go somewhere this weekend.
Speaker 2:Where is she going to take you? Don't look at my page. Yeah, don't look at her page. I see you cheating over there, all right off where miami oh, I was taking a plane yeah that's what I was like how far are we going?
Speaker 1:or are we not taking a plane?
Speaker 2:I mean, it's a weekend, I guess all right.
Speaker 1:So greece, because she hasn't been there weekend weekend.
Speaker 3:Well, you said the flight greece for a weekend.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the flight to miami is four and a half hours what's the first thing your partner would buy if they won the lotto?
Speaker 3:okay, I put land, just land I put farm.
Speaker 2:Oh okay, land and farm. I like that all right. Who's more likely to leave the house with mismatched socks?
Speaker 1:I'll go relax. It's not a race.
Speaker 2:She's all I know this answer. I'm writing it in big, bold letters Everything's a race. I said me yes, yeah.
Speaker 3:You're it. I actually pair my socks and put it in the drawer.
Speaker 2:Okay and last question who's more likely to apologize, even if they are right?
Speaker 1:yeah ava do you want to show them your paper?
Speaker 2:no, fernanda, yeah ava. She's saying sorry first I mean fern's like waiting yeah hell has to freeze over no, it just has.
Speaker 1:I have to really be sorry to say sorry, oh and that doesn't happen very often.
Speaker 2:God, alright, now we're gonna play our last game with Fernanda before we say goodbye and we call this boo or snooze.
Speaker 3:Celebrity edition oh, I wanna play this so, ava, I wrote down the celebrities, okay, alright, so you're gonna tell us if want to boo them or snooze them, and if you think of any, you can throw them in there too Okay. Because she's been wanting to play. Okay, okay, all right, michelle Rodriguez. What the fuck is that she was?
Speaker 2:in.
Speaker 3:Fast and the Furious.
Speaker 2:You need to make them from like-, but I thought she would have known this is in our day Fast and the Furious, fast and the Furious.
Speaker 3:Yes, vin Diesel's girl. Oh, the Latina girl. Yep, the Latin girl that's in Fast and the Furious. She's got a body, but I'll snooze her, boo, you'll snooze her. I'll snooze her, sin Santana.
Speaker 1:I snooze her now. She's past time, damn boo okay I know, you see why I work out now, you see why I told you, I told you, all right, margaret robbie, I love her boo or booing her cardi b. She's my homegirl. I'm snoozing her lotto. I'm snoozing her too. She's a little too much for me. I thought that you no, you got me wrong, babe. You told me. You told me she's cute, but she's not going to be my boo All right Rihanna.
Speaker 1:You like. That's who you wrote. Yeah, I thought you know who I like Burner Boo or snooze, boo or snooze, boo or snooze.
Speaker 3:I'll boo her. That's a hard boo. You knew who I like. I'll boo her.
Speaker 2:I'll boo her. That was a hard boo, though.
Speaker 3:Mariah Carey.
Speaker 1:I'll snooze her.
Speaker 3:Avril Lavigne Snooze.
Speaker 1:Alicia.
Speaker 2:Keys. I'm surprised. She knew who that was.
Speaker 1:Snooze. I did Because she likes Sk8er Boi. I put Melianne. I said Mel, this is what I listen to on my MP3 player. Who?
Speaker 3:was the last one. Sorry, alicia Keys.
Speaker 1:Snooze.
Speaker 3:Katy Perry Snooze. That's all I have.
Speaker 1:Who do you? I don't know.
Speaker 3:Sweeney, cindy Sweeney. Oh, because she has knockers, that's why I? Did it. I asked Cindy Sweeney on the last one. That's why I didn't want to ask. Okay, cindy Sweeney, boo.
Speaker 2:All right, guys, we're going to wrap it up. We're going to say thank you to Miss Fernanda for coming on. Also, fern, where can people follow you? Because she is a hairstylist?
Speaker 1:So I'm in the LA area and you can follow me. On Hair by Fernanda Spelled like Fernando, but just an A at the end and, yeah, I'll follow you guys back.
Speaker 2:All right. So thank you so much for watching, guys, and we'll catch you on the next one Later. Boos, later, boos, bye, babe. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of the let's Say More podcast. If you can, please show your love and support by writing a review on Apple Podcasts, rating us on Spotify and, of course, spreading the word and sharing us with your community, we would greatly appreciate it. The let's Say More podcast is produced by yours truly, solange Aurelio and Ava Mozaffari, and edited by myself as well, solange Aurelio.
