19. PMS is a feminist issue

In this episode I'm reading an essay from my substack titled "PMS is a Feminist Issue - How the Patriarchy Gaslights Women Into Ignoring Their Premenstrual Truth".

I look at the wider societal implications of why we experience so much suffering in our premenstrual phase, rather than experiencing it as the absolute power house it is.

And if you'd prefer to read the episode you can do that on my substack.

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Website: www.letmebleedinpeace.com

Email: claire@letmebleedinpeace.com

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Transcript

 Hello, welcome. I am your host, Claire, and in this episode I wanted to read you a Substack essay that I have written. It's my first post on Substack and I wanted to read the essay out loud, um, for my podcast as well. The park, the. The essay is titled, PMS is a Feminist Issue. So I know I talk a lot about the personal side of PMS or PMDD and the like healing that goes into that and the, yeah, the, the personal inner kind of healing journey, becoming who you truly are kind of stuff, you know, all of that.

I talk a lot about that, but actually there are some. Really big, deeper societal undercurrent. And fundamentally at the core of my kind of philosophy of all this work is that reclaiming your menstrual cycle and you know, really looking at your PMS and PMDD in this kind of less pathologizing way is a radical act of feminism.

Like it's, it's a massive, you know, f you to the patriarchy. So that is.

So that's kind of, um, where this essay came from. So yeah, I'm really excited to share it. Okay, so 

PMS is a feminist issue, how the patriarchy gaslights women into ignoring their premenstrual truth. As I've gone on my healing journey with PMDD and gained a different, less pathologizing perspective on my menstrual cycle, I've come to see that PMS is in fact a feminist issue.

Let's face it, the menstrual cycle is a wildly taboo topic. Look at the comments on any Instagram post talking about it, and you'll see things like, Ew, gross, or You really shouldn't be talking about it, that in public. It is something to be kept behind closed doors, even amongst women. Have you ever noticed the awkward shift that happens when someone mentions their period out loud in public, and especially in front of men?

It's like a known fact of life that we aren't allowed to acknowledge publicly. So when it comes to even having a conversation about PMS on PMDD is going against that patriarchal norm to keep the menstrual cycle hush hush. Then on top of that, of course you have the mad woman trope.

No one likes a mad woman. The patriarchy loves a quiet, docile, soft, well-behaved woman, everything. We are not in our luteal phase. Women who express strong emotions, particularly anger or dissatisfaction, are often labeled as irrational or hysterical even when those emotions are entirely valid and appropriate.

Hysteria, a so-called disorder characterized by emotional instability in women was only removed as an official diagnosis from the DSM five in 1980. Before that, women exhibiting symptoms of PMDD could have been locked up in asylums. Many were.  And even today, medical misogyny persists.

 How often are we dismissed with a casual, it's probably just anxiety when seeking help for hormonal or mental health concerns. Historically powerful women have been met with the same suspicion. Anti suffragists in the nine, in the 19th and 20th century argued that women could shouldn't vote because they were too emotional to make rational decisions.

In the 1970s, US President Gerald Ford suggested that a female president would be dangerous due to her menstrual cycle saying, I don't think women should be president because once a month she'd have these days. Margaret Thatcher faced similar scrutiny over her supposed emotional nature when running for office.

Similarly, Hillary Clinton endured relentless sexist commentary with critics suggesting she was too bossy, too shrill, too emotional. All the meanwhile, male leaders displaying the same traits, assert, assertiveness, ambition, decisiveness are seen as strong and authoritative. A man is a boss, but a woman is bossy.

The problem isn't that women are more emotional. It's that we're punished for the emotions that men are being praised for. And here's where the premenstrual phase becomes really radical. A premenstrual woman is a threat to the status quo because she sees through the bullshit, she questions, she calls things out.

She refuses to tolerate what she normally, lets slide. And because we haven't been taught how to harness this power, we often experience it as suffering instead. The real problem isn't that the premenstrual phase makes us overly sensitive. It's that we haven't been given the tools to work with our premenstrual tooth serum because if we did, if we actually knew how to channel that power, we'd be utterly unstoppable.

A low tolerance for bullshit.  Have you ever noticed how when you're premenstrual things that wouldn't usually bother you? Absolutely make your blood boil? The hormonal shifts that occur really change something within us. That my friend is the premenstrual truth syndrome.

That rage and that anger is highlighting all the crap you normally put up with because you've been socialized as a woman and conditioned to be, the sacrificial caretaker at all costs, including your own wellbeing and saying, yeah, we're done with this. Now, of course there's some nuance  to this for two reasons.

One, it's often not about the seemingly trivial thing you blew up over, but it is pointing to something d. PSA, and this applies to most arguments in relationships as well. And number two, sometimes the thing the rage is pointing to is a projection, something unhealed within yourself that is being highlighted to you through another person.

A premenstrual phase is a potent time for highlighting shadows and wounds within ourselves that we need resolving, as well as unmet needs and desires. Now I do want to acknowledge that many people with PMTD struggle with extreme thoughts during their luteal phase, including suicidal ideation. Obviously, I'm not saying that you should off yourself because you're, that's your premenstrual truth, serum speaking.

I'm also not saying that if you feel like you have to dump your boyfriend every month, that that is what you should do. What I am saying is that as someone who has absolutely been there, is that there is a reason you feel that way. It is not because you're broken and it is not because you are crazy.

There is a part of you that is highlighting something really, really important that needs attention. It just doesn't always have the best solution. In other words, it's saying, this is shit. I don't wanna do this anymore, but it just can't say any other way out. So yes, even extreme PMDD symptoms like that are still a signal that something needs to change, whether that's trauma resolution or external circumstances.

But that's not the point of this particular post. But if you are curious, I'd totally recommend listening to some other episodes of my podcast. The point of this particular post is to show that PMS is a feminist issue, not just a personal one. So with that premenstrual truth serum.

What I'm saying is that we are painfully aware of the misogyny, both institutionalized at home and even within ourselves. We see it in the weaponized incompetence. We see it in how much emotional labor we're expected to do for those around us. We see how our boundaries aren't always respected and taken seriously.

We see how we aren't taken  as seriously as our male counterparts. And if you are a member of any other marginalized community, the oppression you experience as a result of that will also become painfully clear. And that isn't a bad thing. It's shining a light on that. Unless, of course you are one of the people who seek to uphold the structures that us, when we're premenstrual, our tolerance for bullshit is at an all time low.

Including the patriarchal bullshit that most of us deal with on the daily. So yes, PMS is a feminist issue. So where do we go from here? Am I saying that every Ltil phase you need to take on the world's issues and single handedly undo 10,000 years of patriarchy? No, obviously not. What I am saying is that you need to tend to your own garden.

Look at your relationship to your menstrual cycle. Look at how you talk to yourself about your PMS or PMDD. Learn how to work with your cycle rather than against it. Learn to speak the language of your premenstrual symptoms so that you can understand them and reclaim your premenstrual power as well as getting relief from the intensity of your symptoms.

When you do, you are a dangerous woman In the eyes of the patriarchy. Remember that next time you go to court yourself crazy. If you have enjoyed this episode, I wanna invite you to download the Premenstrual Survival Pack. It's free, and it's a 38 page um, PDF with lots and lots of resources to help you get relief from the suffering that you might be experiencing right now from your premenstrual.

Symptoms and really help you tap into that premenstrual power that I am talking about. Um, so thank you so much for listening and being here. I would love to hear your thoughts on this. This is quite a potent topic. So yeah, let me know. Let me know what you think and what your thoughts and contribute your kind of piece to the conversation.

I would love to hear it.