#26: Own Your Day, Part 3: How to Build a To-Do List That Actually Works

Ever stared at a to-do list that somehow made you feel more overwhelmed instead of focused?

You’re not alone.

For a long time, I thought productivity was about cramming everything into one massive list and just powering through it. But the truth is, your to-do list shouldn't be another source of pressure. It should support you, your goals and your dreams.  

In this final episode of the Own Your Day series, we’re digging into the real reason most to-do lists don’t work—and how to create one that actually helps you build momentum and take action - minus the burn out.

When you build your to-do list using the four foundational pillars in this episode, you will finally feel organized, focused, and in control of your day.

Grab a pen and paper and your favorite beverage and let's build a to-do list together that moves you forward.

00:22 Welcome to the Distracted Dreamer Podcast

00:54 Introduction to the Own Your Day Mini Series

01:43 The Importance of To-Do Lists

03:01 Common Challenges with To-Do Lists

04:58 The Four Foundational Pillars of a Kick-Butt To-Do List

05:27 Pillar 1: Set a Deadline for Your Workday

08:22 Pillar 2: Find Your Tiger Time

10:46 Pillar 3: Create Process Goals

14:42 Pillar 4: Schedule Time Blocks

17:43 Making To-Do Lists a Daily Habit

20:19 Recap of the Own Your Day Series

21:53 Final Thoughts 

22:52 Legal Disclaimer

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Transcript

0:00

The good news is, is that with the right approach, a to-do list, it can really be a powerful tool to help you own your day.

Speaker 3 0:08

You're never too busy, too tired, too old, or too anything to pursue your dreams. Welcome to the Distracted Dreamer Podcast, where you'll learn how to move all those never ending distractions aside and chase your dreams with confidence.

0:30

Hey Dreamers. It's your friend and host Carlene, and I just wanted to take a minute and welcome you to the Destructive Dreamer podcast. I am so excited that you're here and you've taken this time for yourself because today it's a special one. This is the third and final part in our Own Your Day mini series. And if you've made it through parts one and two, I hope you're already feeling the shift, that growing confidence that yes, you actually can be the architect of your own time. You can own your time. You can own your days, your weeks, your months, your years, and ultimately your life. In episode one, we talked about the magic of controlling your mornings, that little slice of the day that you can fully own before the world demands your attention. And then in episode two, we dove into creating your standard operating rules. Those gentle but firm boundaries and routines that keep you focused and free. And today we're bringing it all home with this final step. It's constructing a kick butt to-do list. But before we dive in, I have a question for you. And do you make to-do lists? And if you do, how often do you do it daily, weekly, or maybe you just do it when things feel overwhelming. And what's very interesting is while to-do lists are a popular productivity tool. Not everyone uses them consistently. In fact, a study conducted by Life Hack Method, it found that 33% of people use to-do lists and 24% rely on their inboxes as their to-do list. And 12% of people schedule everything in their calendars. And then a notable 25% handle tasks as they arise without any structured system. So the research, it highlights that a significant portion of people, they either lack a structured time management system, or they're using less effective methods than what I am teaching you in this series, which can lead to decreased productivity and actually increase your stress. So why don't more people use to-do lists regularly? Well, here are some common reasons, and these are reasons that I've heard from my clients over the last decade as to why they don't use a to-do list consistently. The first reason is they don't know how to create an effective list. Like they don't have a clear method and lists can become overwhelming and ultimately ineffective. Can you relate to that? Or maybe you feel like a failure when you don't complete everything on the list. Yeah, sometimes we cram everything in there and we are just setting ourselves up to fail, and that discourages us and then we avoid it. We avoid making the list and we avoid doing the things that should be on our lists. Another thing that happens really frequently is you might lose your list. How many times have you written a list and you're like, oh, dang, where did I put that? Or it's in a notebook and you shove it in a drawer. And when you lose your list, guess what? It's no longer a tool, right? So it makes it really hard to stay on track. And the last thing is it's really hard to be consistent at making a list. It's really hard to make it a habit, and if you don't have it as a habit, then you forget about it. So if any of these resonate with you. I just want you to know you are not alone. But the good news is, is that with the right approach, a to-do list, it can really be a powerful tool to help you own your day. I. Now, let's be honest, most of us are not suffering from a lack of dreams. A lot of us, we got like a lot of dreams. What we're suffering from is an overload of tabs that are open in our brains and to-do lists that look more like overwhelming, lists of just pressure, right? It's a to-do list of pressure. So today I'm gonna walk you through the anatomy of a to-do list that actually works. That fuels momentum instead of draining it. That gives you clarity, that gives you direction and the satisfying click of knowing exactly what needs to be done. Let's dive into the four foundational pillars of a kick butt to do list. So how do you construct your to-do list instead of just scribbling it down? I like to think of it like building a house. You want a solid foundation, not something that's slapped together in a rush that crumbles by noon. So here are the four foundational pillars that are gonna make your list, not just functional, but really, really powerful. Pillar number one is to set a deadline for the end of your workday. Let's be real. Without a finish line, work can bleed into every part of your life. Emails, a dinner, slack messages during family time. That lingering feeling when you're sitting on the couch of, oh, I should be doing more. But here's the truth that I've learned. The hard way is Parkinson's law is very real. Parkinson's law states that a task will take as much time as you allow for it, regardless of how long it truly needs. So if you give yourself a week to complete a task, you'll take a week to complete it, even if it could have been done in a day, and you know why this happens? Well, oftentimes it's because we tend to fill the allocated time with various activities, or we get sucked into the perfectionist trap or we go down rabbit holes, some of which might not even be directly related to the task at hand. Can you relate to that? So Parkinson's law says that productivity expands to fill the time that you allow it. So here's an example. Have you ever been in an hour long meeting and afterwards you're thinking all of that, the rhetoric, the disagreements, the egos having to talk? Yeah. That meeting could have been done in 15 minutes. What a waste of my time. Have you ever thought that it happens all the time. So this is why the first pillar to creating your to-do list is to start by choosing your end of day cutoff. Maybe it's 5:00 PM, maybe it's four 30, whatever it is, name it. And then you work backwards from there because you need to know how many hours you have available in a day, and it's usually less than you think. So you don't wanna just say, I have all day and all night to work on things. That's Parkinson's law. Then you will put things off during the day and this will bleed over into your personal life at night. And you don't wanna do that. So let's say that you wanna be totally done by five 30 and your commute takes 30 minutes. That means no later than 5:00 PM you're shutting that laptop, which means all the big tasks they need to be wrapped up by four 30. So you can have that buffer time to prep for tomorrow. Send those final emails and mentally close the loop. Now this one habit, giving your day a boundary, it can transform your stress levels and give you the rest that you actually need so that you're refueled for tomorrow. Remember, a clear end makes your start the next day much more intentional. Okay, so that was pillar one. Create an end time for your workday. Pillar number two is to find your tiger Time. Now this little gem, this comes from the ever inspiring Amy Porterfield and I fell in love with the concept the first time I heard it. Your tiger time is that slice of your day where you are naturally more alert, more focused, and more creatively on. It's kinda like your secret weapon time. Let's talk about how do you find your tiger time? So here's a few questions to help you dial in. You can ask yourself, when do I feel most energized during the day? I can tell you my time is in the morning. Don't ask me to do something after lunch. I'm kind of tapped out by then. When do I do my best work? Where time flies and I'm in the zone? Mine is morning time, and sometimes we, oddly enough, I have this burst of energy right after dinner. But it doesn't happen all the time. Another question is, if I had to do my most important task in one hour, ooh, what time of day would I choose? What's that one hour? That one hour where you know you're gonna kill it? And then the last question is, when am I least likely to be interrupted? That's a big one. Don't schedule your tiger time when you know that it's a high disruption time. So for some people, maybe your tiger time is between six and 9:00 AM. For others, it might be that sweet spot after lunch. But the key is to notice your rhythms and protect that time like a tiger guarding its territory. And here's the thing, not all tasks are created equal. you have high energy, high focus tasks like writing, like working on strategy, problem solving, or recording like I'm doing right now. Those should be done during your tiger time. Then you have your low energy tasks. Those are things like replying to emails or filing receipts or scheduling, and these can be reserved for your natural energy dips. Think of it like budgeting your brain power. Spend the good stuff on what matters most. Okay. So the first pillar was to create an end time for your workday. The second pillar is to choose your tiger time. Find your tiger time and use it. Pillar number three is to create process goals. Now here's where so many people get tripped up, the difference between a vague goal and a process goal. Let me give you a few examples of what I mean by process goals. So a vague goal would be, I'm gonna write a book, a process goal says. I'm gonna write 500 words every weekday at 8:00 AM That's a process goal, or another process goal would be that you're gonna write the book proposal, or I'm going to do the research for chapter two, or I'm gonna write the outline, get specific. Anyone else should be able to look at your to-do list and know exactly what your focus is. You don't wanna write on your to-do list, write my book.'cause you don't know what you're gonna be doing. You have to be very, very specific. Here's another one. Here's a vague goal that you would put on your to-do list. Get in shape, a process goal says do a 20 minute workout. A process goal says do a 20 minute workout Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 5:30 PM That's very specific. But that's not specific enough for me because it doesn't tell me what the 20 minute workout actually is. So one of my goals is to move every day, but that's not what I put on my calendar. That's not what I put on my to-do list. I actually put the time of my peer bar class on my daily schedule on my calendar because if I just put Move today on it. I would have to decide what does that mean? How should I move today? How long? It's too vague, but a scheduled time knowing what kind of movement I'm doing and for how long. It makes it so easy for me to plan it and commit to it. So I know what you're saying, but you don't go anywhere for a class to work out, and that's fine. If you're planning on walking every day, put it on your calendar. Walking the dog from seven to 7:30 AM boom. That's what goes on your to-do list. Okay, here's another example. A vague goal would be, I'm gonna start a podcast. A process goal would sound like outline one episode every Saturday morning. Now, when I started this podcast, I literally never put start a podcast on my to-do list. Instead, I blocked out time to brainstorm podcast titles. So that's what I wrote on my to-do list, brainstorm podcast titles. Then I blocked out the time to create the podcast artwork. So on my to-do list, it was create podcast artwork, and then it was, I have to brainstorm topics for episodes. That's what went on my to-do list, not start a podcast. And then I had a, block time to learn the tech behind getting the podcast recorded and published. So on my to-do list, it was learn the tech to record and publish. So you see saying, I'm gonna work on my podcast. It's just, it's too broad. Can you feel the difference? Process goals are actionable. They don't just describe what you want or the finish line. They define how you're gonna get there, and they shift your attention from the far off finish line to the actual next step that's in front of you. So here's a simple way to turn a vague goal into a process goal. Just ask yourself, what's the smallest daily or weekly action that moves me in the direction of this goal or dream? What are those steps that move me forward and always zoom in on your first or next step. That is what goes on your to-do list and ultimately on your calendar. And I'm gonna show you how to do that in the next step. So pillar four, and I've already used these words, is to schedule time blocks. Now this one's simple, but it's really, really powerful because if it's not on your calendar, it's not real. If it's not on your calendar, it's not real, and this is critical. You must have a calendar or planner that breaks out the day, hour by hour, or even in 30 minute increments in order to time block the right way. So if you don't have one of those highly, highly recommend you go on Amazon or go up to your nearest staple store or wherever you get your planners. And make sure that you have a planner that has the times of the day broken out, hour by hour or in 30 minute increments. So you have to schedule your to-do list. You have to schedule you like you would schedule Anyone else? So think of your calendar. It's not a trap, but it's more like, like a canvas. It's a place where you're painting your priorities and your calendar is your canvas to see where the white space is in your day. So start by setting your end of day deadline. If you wanna be home and mentally free by five 30, what time do you need to stop work? Then put all your meetings and your commitments on your calendar again as time blocks with a start and end time. Now you're gonna reverse engineer scheduling your to-do list items into your time box. So depending on the calendar planner you use, remember, you should be able to see your entire day, hour by hour, or maybe even in 30 minute increments. And when you see this, you have a visual of the white space you have in your day to time block items from your to-do list. And this is called back planning, and it's one of the most underrated tools to have some time freedom. Now you wanna block your tasks, which is also known as your process goals that we just talked about into your day. You wanna assign start and end times, give them a home on your schedule, and respect those blocks the same way you'd respect a client meeting because your dreams and goals deserve that level of commitment. So those were the four foundational pillars of a kick butt to-do list. Pillar number one is to set a deadline for the end of your workday. Pillar number two is to find your tiger time. Pillar number three is to create process goals because that is what you put on your to-do list and ultimately on your calendar. And pillar number four is to schedule time blocks. Okay, so now you know how to create a strong to-do list that's going to support you throughout your day. But here's the bigger question, how do you make this a daily habit? Because I talked about this at the beginning of the episode, is one of the hardest things is doing this consistently and making it a habit. So creating a to-do list, it's just the beginning. In order to really benefit from it, it needs to become a daily habit, and here's some ways to make that happen. The first thing that I always encourage people to do is plan tomorrow today. Plan tomorrow today. Spend a few minutes each evening outlining your tasks for the next day. This practice, it sets a clear intention and it actually reduces your morning decision fatigue. And I say this all the time, your future self will thank your present self for doing this every single time. The next thing that you wanna do is you want to keep your list visible, whether it's a notebook. Or a digital app. Keep your to-do list in sight you want to refer to it all the time throughout the day to help you stay on track. You don't know where to go next. You gotta look at your to-do list. You just finished something on your to-do list. You wanna go back there and you wanna cross it off, check it off. Give yourself a high five and move on. Don't make a to-do list and shove it in a drawer, or don't use an app that is too tedious to constantly have to pull up throughout the day. Make it simple. Make it easy and keep it visible at all costs. And finally, review and adjust. So at the end of the day, review what you've accomplished and celebrate those wins, and then adjust your list as needed for tomorrow. So going through this type of reflection, it helps you recognize the progress that you've made, and it helps you plan tomorrow better. If there was something on your to-do list that you had time blocked and it didn't get done today, do not beat yourself up. Just own it. And you absolutely must move it forward to tomorrow or another time when you can focus on it and get her done. Okay? No shame and moving things forward. In fact, that's what the most productive people do, move it forward. So remember, a to-do list isn't, it's not just a note. It's a commitment to yourself, and by keeping it front and center, you're gonna reinforce what your priorities are and you're gonna be taking control of your time. Let's wrap this all up. Let's zoom out for a quick minute here, because this is the third episode in the own Your Day Approach, and I wanna review what those three steps are, the first step in the first episode was to control your mornings. The second step to own your day is to create your standard operating rules. And the third step to own your day is to construct a kick, butt to-do list. Those are the three steps. You can go back and listen to these episodes at any time. And remember, these aren't rigid rules. These are the building blocks for a life where you get to call the shots. This is where time doesn't slip through your fingers anymore. This is where your energy is focused, where your goals are really clear and you're making steady progress. So today, take a moment to check in with your to-do list and ask yourself, is it small and achievable? Did I plan it the night before? Is my number one priority, front and center? Am I honoring my tiger time? Are my goals broken into actionable process, steps or goals? And did I schedule time blocks and set an end of day deadline? If not, no shame, no stress, just adjust. And that's the beauty of owning your day. You can course correct at any time. And I want to know what came up for you today around your to-do list. Are you ready to embrace creating one every day? What's one thing you learned today? Or what's something you already knew? But this was a great reminder and I really wanna know, did you enjoy the own your day series and how it was broken out into these three episodes? I'd also love to know what's your one big takeaway? I wanna know, so hit the send a text to Carlene link in the show notes and tell me everything.

Carlene 22:18

I love spending time with you here. And if today's episode sparked something for you. I'd love to hear about it. Leave a review, share it with a friend or come chat with me on Instagram. And thank you so much for tuning in. And your dreams. Or waiting for you. Your time. Is now. And I can't wait to see you in the next episode. Oh, and one more thing. This is the legal language. You know, the stuff that the lawyers put together, and they say that I need to read this to you. So here we go. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I'm not a licensed therapist. This podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professionals. Got it? Good. I will see you in the next episode.