#41: Embracing Self-Care and Recovery: Fuel Your Dreams and Prevent Burnout

Have you ever pushed through the week only to crash—your brain foggy, your body drained, your heart disconnected from your dreams?

I used to fight those crash days, but I’ve learned they’re not failures—they’re signals. Our bodies are always whispering what they need, and when we ignore them, they shout. 

The good news? When we practice small, daily acts of self-care and recovery, those crashes get gentler, our energy steadier, and our dreams easier to hold onto.

In this episode of The Distracted Dreamer, I’m sharing real stories from my community, surprising insights from my own Oura Ring, and science-backed practices to help you listen to your body and protect your energy.

HERE ARE 3 KEY TAKE AWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE

1️⃣ How recovery strengthens creativity, focus, and motivation. Recovery isn't just for athletes, it's for creatives too.

2️⃣ The quick daily pauses that lower stress and prevent burnout before it hits. Not bubble baths and clichés, but real, science-backed practices.

3️⃣ How to tune into your body's signals telling you, "enough is enough". Start noticing the subtle signs: Your shoulders inching toward your ears while you write that email. Re-reading the same sentence over and over. Snapping at your partner. Those are the signs. 

Rest, recovery, and small daily acts of self-care are the very things that protect your dreams from fading to the background of your life.

LINKS FROM THIS EPISODE:

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Transcript

Speaker 3 0:01

You're never too busy, too tired, too old, or too anything to pursue your dreams. Welcome to the Distracted Dreamer Podcast, where you'll learn how to move all those never ending distractions aside and chase your dreams with confidence.

0:18

Well, hello friend. Welcome back to The Distracted Dreamer. I'm your host Carlene, and I am so glad that you're here with me today. And if this is your first time here, you are now part of the Distracted Dreamer family. So welcome. So I got a question for you. Do you ever feel guilty for slowing down? You know, like every pause costs you progress. Yeah. I feel that more than I care to admit. But what I was considering is what if the truth is the opposite? What if rest and recovery and small daily acts of self care are the very things that protect you and your dreams? In this episode today, we are going to have an honest conversation on what recovery really looks like, the messy crashes, the signals that we all miss, and a couple mindset shifts that help us embrace rest as fuel. And I'm gonna share a couple stories from my today I can A DHD community and some surprising data that I learned about myself from my aura ring. And then we're gonna finish it up with some science-backed practices that you can start using today so that you can slow down without feeling guilty and take care of yourself. And you know, showing up to these conversations is one of the best things you can do for yourself. And I'll be honest, sometimes just showing up is the win, isn't it? And that was something I was reminded of during a recent coworking session with my today ican, A DHD community. And it's weird because the minute people pop into the virtual room, I can somehow feel the energy. And this day the energy in the room was low. You could feel it like we were all dragging our feet a bit. And I decided instead of trying to power through this, I gave us. All permission to pause and some time for everybody to share a win. And here's the beautiful part, the wins. They weren't about hustle or achievements or check marks on a to-do list. They were actually about slowing down. And one of the members said that she was really, really proud of herself for going to the beach over the weekend. Now she's not a beach person, you know, the sand and sunburn, all of that. But she still went because she loves the water and she let the salty air and the sound of the waves do their work on her soul. And you know what? She came back more relaxed and clearheaded. And when it was time to work again, the work didn't take as long. She wasn't fighting her brain and she felt refreshed. Huge win. And then another member, she had been dealing with migraines like, you know. If have you ever had migraine? It's just something that stops you in your tracks. And so her win was that she also took some much needed downtime and she told us that while she's been busy doing all the things that she's also been carrying a lot mentally and emotionally lately, and that just reminded me of how it's those invisible things that are what drag us down more than anything. And our bodies, like they eventually, they, they call us back sometimes very forcefully, sometimes with a migraine. And eventually it was my turn and my win was similar. I made a hard decision a couple weeks ago and I had to take some things off my plate. Including this podcast. Yep. No new episode came out and I felt so guilty. And you know what? My downloads dipped the platforms. They don't like that. But here's the thing, I was on overload and I just, I needed some space and now I'm back behind the mic with a lot of energy again, but that little pause, it was necessary. And I'll tell you, I know it was necessary because my aura ring told me. So now, if you don't know what that is, it's a ring that tracks your sleep, your heart rate, your stress, recovery, all the things. And you know what? It turns out my heart is younger than my biological age. Woo-hoo. Major win. But I also learned I'm carrying more stress than I thought. I feel busy, but I don't feel stressed. But according to my aura ring, my body is saying otherwise. And so this ring, it's really, really cool because it gives me daily readiness scores. You know, it's kinda like a coach whispering, you've been going hard for three days, take a break today. And you know what I did when it told me that I ignored it and then I hit a wall. Energy gone, brain fog, and it was like torture for me for that entire day. I was just trying to fight against all of it. And what I'm trying to do is I'm really trying to listen. I gotta learn to listen and to tune in and to trust the wisdom of my body and what it's telling me. Now, here's the thing, when I stepped back from recording. Guilt was the first thing that showed up. I bet that happens to you too when you step back. My brain went straight to You're letting people down. And the downloads will drop and you are behind. And maybe you know that feeling too, the guilt that comes with stopping with choosing to rest. It's so wired into us, right? Like our worth is measured in constant motion. But here's what I'm learning. Guilt. It's a signal too. It's not the truth. Guilt, it's just an old story. One that says Rest is selfish or slowing down means you're falling behind. And if we buy into that story, we end up running on fumes and showing up half-hearted for our work and our dreams. So the reframe or the mindset shift, it's this, taking care of yourself isn't indulgent, it's necessary. It's fuel, it's oxygen. It's what allows your dreams to actually have a chance. Think about this. Athletes, they don't feel guilty for resting. They know recovery is part of training. They're not killing it the night before, a big game. No, they're resting. They're in recovery because rest is what allows muscles to rebuild, to increase our strength, and for performance to improve. So why should it be any different for us? Our creativity, our focus, our passion, they all need recovery too. And here's the magic part. When we stop carrying the weight of guilt, rest becomes lighter and it becomes something that we can look forward to. We stop seeing it as lost time, and we start seeing it as our time because it's the space where our ideas, our energy, and our courage quietly grow. And here's where recovery comes in. I've noticed a pattern in myself that after three or four days of going, going, going, I crash, I hit a wall, my brain just stops cooperating, my energy disappears. I have no motivation. And no matter how much I want to keep going, I just, I can't, the motivation is not the same. My motivation is out of guilt. It's not out of, I really wanna do this. And I used to fight that. I'd push, I'd bargain with myself. I'd feel frustrated that I couldn't keep up. But the truth is that crash is my body waving a big red flag saying, enough, enough. So what if instead of resisting the crash, we embraced it. What if we saw recovery not as a failure, but it's just part of the natural rhythm of being human. That crash is there for a reason for me, and it's my system. Rebooting, recalibrating and forcing me to stop before I burn myself out completely. And it's the same for you. And in fact, I have to tell you a story about my Aura ring. Well, my Aura Ring advisor specifically, there's an element in there where there's an advisor. Um, I think of her as a coach. I really need to give her a name. What do you think? You know what? In the show notes underneath this episode, there is, a link that says, Send Carlene a text. Click that link. I'm inviting you to help me name my Aura Ring Advisor. I feel like I wanna give her a name and I feel like she's a she because she gets me. So anyways, send me a text with that. I, I'd love to hear from you. Um, but anyways, me and my Aura Ring advisor, we're still getting to know each other, but from what I know so far, she's pretty wise. And here's what she told me. After only two days of me going, going, going. It's like she knew the crash was coming and she said Your recent activity shows consistent movement and frequent exercise, especially with swimming and bar workouts. This supports stress management and still you may find balancing effort and rest tricky. Oh my gosh, she's totally got me on that. And then she says, if you feel mentally or physically stretched today, even a short, quiet moment, like a few minutes of reading can help you recharge remember that gentle activity or simply stepping away for a breath of fresh air also counts as care. Okay. And then she, let me just pause here, because she called me out next in a very, uh, yes, I need to hear this kind of way. So she continued on and she says, you don't need to push through every day. Oof. Oh my gosh. You don't need to push through every day. That is exactly my mentality. I just need to push through. So notice what feels right and let today's pace match your needs is what she said. Notice what feels right and let today's pace match your needs. And with that, I realized I don't even know what I need. What I need is to pay attention. And here's the hopeful part that I believe to my core. When we practice small daily care, when we build in recovery as we go, whether that's sleep or breath work or a walk, or simply saying, no, we reduce the chances of those big crash days. Now, it doesn't mean that they're never gonna happen, but they become gentler, shorter, maybe less overwhelming. In recovery, it doesn't have to feel like a total shutdown. It can become part of your rhythm. Just something that supports you instead of stopping you. So that's the invitation to care for yourself daily. So recovery is woven into the flow of your life, not forced upon you all at once. Now, here's why everyday care matters. I'm not talking big routines, I'm talking just small care pauses, because science tells us that our brains are not built for constant productivity. We cycle between focus states and rest states, and researchers at Stanford found that our brain's default mode network, the part that lights up when we're resting or daydreaming. It's directly connected to creativity and problem solving and imagination. So when we never slow down, we literally shut off the part of our brain that fuels our dreams. And this explains exactly why I couldn't push a podcast out that week. I had nothing, literally nothing. So when we care for ourselves daily in small ways, we're not just taking a break. We're creating the conditions where our dreams can actually thrive. And one of the most powerful things that we can do is learn to notice our signals. I have got to get better at this because stress shows up in very subtle ways, often in the middle of very ordinary moments. So it could be, oh, you're writing that email that you've been putting off, and suddenly your shoulders are creeping up towards your ears or. Maybe you've been staring at your screen for 10 minutes, rereading the same sentence, and it's just nothing's clicking. Or you let out a long sigh after switching between three tabs without even realizing it. Or how about this? You snap at a loved one over something tiny like the way they loaded the dishwasher, and it's only later that you realize it wasn't about the dishwasher at all. It's you on your way to burnout. So these are small signs, but they matter. They are your body saying, Hey, I need a reset. So sleep researcher Dr. Matthew Walker, he has shown that even mild sleep loss can impair focus and memory as much as being slightly intoxicated, which means that mindset of, I'll just push through tonight, that choice, it can steal hours from your day tomorrow. And the trick. Isn't to have one perfect routine? Nope. It's to listen daily. Every day your body has different needs. Some days you need a walk in the salty ocean air. Other days it's saying Stop scrolling, go to bed. The art is in the listening. So here are a few small evidence-based practices that you can try. The first one is movement. Studies show that even two minutes of walking. Did you hear that? It's just two minutes of walking. Like for me, that's like getting up and letting the dog out, right? But two minutes of walking every half hour can undo some of the health risks of sitting too long. And I know this to be very true, is movement clears the brain fog. It doesn't have to be a workout, just a stretch, or a walk around the block or letting your dog out. The second thing that you could try is some light exposure. Getting natural light within an hour of waking. It resets your circadian rhythm, which improves your sleep, your mood, and your focus throughout the day. Let's say you're working from home and you walk from your bedroom. To the Keurig for your coffee and then into your office without ever stepping outside. Mm. That's an opportunity for you to start your workday with more focus and energy by stepping outside before you step into your office. Another practice is, it's called box breathing or physiological size. So neuroscientist Andrew Huberman. He talks about the double inhale. Slow exhale technique that can lower stress in minutes. It's free, it's fast, and it's powerful. And I find the size to be interesting because size can be like, I'm sighing because I'm annoyed. Right. You know, those size or they can be productive size that we're talking about here that can lower our stress ici. That is, that is one of the practices that I, I use often. Another one is, you know, hydration water, because even mild dehydration, it reduces cognitive performance and your mood. Go get that water bottle and fill it up and keep it next to you because that water can sometimes do more for your focus than any other coffee or caffeinated drink can do. And the fifth thing that you might wanna try is micro journaling. Just jotting down three lines. What am I carrying? What am I grateful for, and what do I want to feel today? Research shows that naming your emotions, it reduces their intensity and it creates clarity. So it's just very short. You don't need to write full sentences. It can just be a couple words. Okay, so now you actually have some practices that you can use. And here's the great thing. You don't need a habit to do it. You just need to pay attention to the signals that we talked about and then choose one of these practices. Choose it in the moment. You don't have to have a big plan. You don't need to put it on the calendar. Pay attention to what your body is telling you and give it what it needs. And it doesn't have to be the same every day. It doesn't have to be the same every hour. Because when we ignore the signals, you know what happens? Our dreams, they fade into the background. Not because we don't care, but it's simply because we don't have the bandwidth to feel connected to them anymore. And fatigue, it makes us forget why we even wanted the dream in the first place. But when we practice these small daily acts of care, something shifts, we don't just have more energy to do the work. We also remember why the work matters, and in our dreams, they feel alive again. So my friend, I want to leave you with this, self-care is not indulgence. It's not about achieving some perfect balance. It's about listening. It's about paying attention to yourself. It's about honoring those quiet signals that tell you, hey. Pause right here, because when you do, you create the space for your dreams to breathe, to grow, and to keep moving you forward. So what's one small way you can care for yourself today? Is it water, an nap, a deep breath, a walk? Whatever it is, just do it. And I would love to hear what that one small way is that you are going to take care of yourself, what resonated with you today? Send me a text. The link is in the show notes below. And when you do that. I also wanna hear, what do you think I should name my Aura Ring advisor. I'm looking for some fun, creative names, so let's get to it and I will, um, let you guys know on a future podcast what I named my Aura Ring Advisor.

Carlene 19:53

Alright, my sweet friend Thank you so much for being here with me today. And remember your dreams. They are waiting for you and your time. It's now and I'll be back next week. Ready to welcome you to our next conversation. Oh, and one more thing. This is the legal language. You know, the stuff that the lawyers put together, and they say that I need to read this to you. So here we go. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I'm not a licensed therapist. This podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professionals. Got it? Good. I will see you in the next episode.