Hustle with Heels Podcast

Ep10. Facing Your Fears: Overcoming What’s Holding You Back From Your Side Hustle

• Cindy Excell

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Fear—it’s the one thing that holds so many of us back from pursuing our dreams.


Whether it’s the fear of failure, judgment, or feeling like you’re not good enough, these thoughts can be loud, persistent, and oh-so-convincing.


But here’s the truth: every successful entrepreneur has felt these fears at some point. The ones who succeed face the fear but do it anyway!


In this episode of Hustle with Heels, I dive deep into the top three fears that stop most people from starting their side hustle dreams.


You’ll hear my personal take on why these fears exist, how they held me back in my journey, what I did to move past them, and—more importantly— what YOU can do to overcome them and not let them stop you from starting your side business!


I’ll share actionable strategies to reframe your fears, take those first steps, and build the confidence you need to make progress—even when the path feels uncertain.


If you’ve ever caught yourself wondering:
- What if I fail?
- What will people think?
- Am I even good enough?
—this episode is for you.

It’s time to stop letting fear hold you back and start creating the business and life you’ve always dreamed of.


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Welcome to the Hustle with Heels podcast. I'm your host, Cindy Excell, a corporate girl, start hustler, wife, and a mom of two. In 2020, I started my first start hustle as an online fitness coach while working in my corporate job as a private wealth manager. Over the years, I have been leaving proof that a corporate career.

And a side hustle can absolutely co exist in harmony. Today, I'm helping corporate women and early stage entrepreneurs create wealth beyond that nine to five jobs and build an online business on their terms. On this podcast, I'll share my knowledge, strategies, and the stories that will help you start and grow your side hustle.

Whether you are ready to diversify your income streams or are looking to build a side business that aligns with your goals. I'm here to support you every step of the way. Now, let's get started.  Hey, friend. Welcome to a new episode of Hustle with Heels podcast, the place where corporate professionals like you learn how to create wealth, purpose and impact outside your nine to five jobs.

Today, we are going to talk about something that often stops most corporate professionals from taking that first step toward building that dream start businesses. It is not that you don't have the talent, skills, or even the desire. It is those nagging fears in the back of your mind that keep whispering, what if I fail?

What will people think? Do I have the expertise to teach others? Am I even good enough to pull this off? Is starting an online business even possible for me, given I have such a demanding corporate job and family life?  Fear is absolutely normal. Every person who's ever stepped into something new has felt it.

But the ones who succeed are the ones who don't let fear stop them.  So in today's episode, I'm going to unpack the top three fears that hold so many of us back which are fear of failure, fear of judgment, and fear of not being good enough.  I'm not just going to dive deep into these fears. And more importantly, I'm going to give you practical and actionable steps to overcome them.

So hopefully by the end of this episode, you will have the clarity and the confidence to take that first step of starting your own online business. Now, let's get into it.  Fear number one, fear of failure. Okay. Let's start with this big one. Fear of failure. This fear often sounds like, what if no one buys from me?

What if I spend all this time and invest all this money, but it doesn't work? What if I make a fool of myself by, you know, advertising my program on the internet? I get it. The fear of failure is one of the most common fears we face when stepping into entrepreneurship. Because quite often we've been conditioned by our environment, our past experience, um, and even society to avoid failure at all costs.

In the corporate world, failure often has direct consequences, such as missed promotions, poor performance reviews. Um, or even job loss. These are tangible risks and the fear of failure is tied directly to our unconscious mind, which holds onto our past experiences. Our unconscious mind, which is wired for survival and keeping us safe, has learned to associate a failure with all those inactive failings such as loss, pain, and shame.

But here is where entrepreneurship is completely different. Failure is not something you can avoid in entrepreneurship. It is in fact part of the journey and the necessary steps that lead to your success. Now, I want to give you a little bit of background about why the fear of failure holds us back.

Fear is actually a natural response, especially when it comes to stepping into uncertainty.  As mentioned before, fear of failure has a lot to do with our unconscious mind, which has a huge influence on our decisions, actions, and perceptions. The unconscious mind is the storehouse of all our memories and past experiences, both those that have been repressed through trauma and those that have consciously been forgotten and are no longer important to us.

It is from those memories and experiences that our beliefs, habits, and behaviors are formed. It's like a database of everything we've learned, every experience, and every success, every failure we have had in the past. When we experience failure, particularly early in life or in any significant ways, our unconscious mind creates associations.

For example, you may have failed an exam in a school, and your unconscious mind might have linked that failure to a feeling of embarrassment, shame, or disappointment.  And those associations are stored in your unconscious mind and will likely resurface whenever you face a situation where success is uncertain.

But here's the catch. The mind doesn't distinguish between past experience and future possibilities. When you are thinking about failure, your mind is actually essentially living in the past. It's replaying those old limiting stories that you've adopted about yourself and your potentials. If you want to succeed, you must break free from those old patterns and rewrite the stories your unconscious mind is telling you.

Now, when it comes to how to overcome the fear of failure, I want to share these three tips. Tip number one, reframe failure as feedback. One of the most powerful tools from NLP, which is the neural and linguistic programming, is a concept of reframing. Which is changing the meaning we attach to our experience.

Failure in the traditional sense is often seen as a permanent state or a reflection of who we are. But reframing actually allows you to look at a failure as feedback, as information, as a way to get the data to improve. For example, if you launch a product and it didn't sell, your unconscious mind might immediately jump to a conclusion like, I'm a failure, or I've failed, or I'm not cut out for this scene.

But if you reframe this experience, it becomes data and information.  It becomes something like, okay, maybe my messaging wasn't clear, or maybe I need to refine my offer to better meet the needs of my potential clients. By using the NLP techniques such as pattern interrupts. You can actually shift your mind's automatic response by thinking things differently.

When fear starts to surface, interrupt the thought patterns with a positive refrain. Think about what data or information you have gained from this experience and how you can utilize this information and feedback to move forward. This simple shift can actually open your mind to possibilities and create a more positive association with failure so that you are not going to self sabotage and so that you can keep taking actions and to keep pivoting and moving forward.

Tip number two is to start small. In NLP, we talk about chunking down, meaning breaking large and overwhelming tasks into smaller and more manageable actions. This technique is especially powerful for overcoming the fear of failure because it reduces the perceived risk. Think of starting your site business as taking a small and incremental steps.

You don't need to launch a full scale service right away. Instead, you test your ideas in the low stakes way, such as you can offer a free coaching session to a friend, and then you can get some feedback or testimonial. And you can even sell a small service to a trusted circle or ask for feedback from people who are already supportive of your vision.

By starting small, you allow your unconscious mind to build confidence gradually through successive approximation. With each small step, your mind becomes less fearful of failure because it learns that taking actions regardless of the outcome is actually safe. Tip number three is to visualize success. 

Fear actually tricks us into imagining the worst case scenario. The key to overcoming this is to reprogram your unconscious mind to imagine the best case scenario instead. This is where visualizations becomes very powerful too. Studies also show that when you vividly imagine your success, your brain responds as if you've already achieved it.

Visualization is a technique that athletes actually and high achievers often use to prime their minds for success. But imagining your ideal outcome, your side business, a thriving, making money, creating impact and achieving those financial security you always desire, you're actually telling your unconscious mind that this is not only possible, but inevitable.

In fact, in my coaching practice, I often use this visualization technique called a future pace at the end of my coaching session with some of my clients. The future pace visualization tool is very powerful because it helps clients Connect with the desired future outcomes in the deeply emotional and motivating way.

By guiding them to mentally step into that future, they can actually vividly experience the success, satisfactions, and confidence they desire, as if it's already happening. This process actually taps into the power of the subconscious mind, aligning clients thoughts, feelings, and actions with their goals.

And you can do that as well.  So, take a few minutes each day to close your eyes and picture the success of your sad business. And ask yourself, if failure weren't an option, in another word, if I cannot fail at all, what would I do differently today? How does that feel? What would my life look like when my business works?

Would I feel more fulfilled, financially secure, and excited to wake up in the morning? So focus on those positive feelings and start associating them with your entrepreneurial journey. The fear of failure will always exist in the background, but it is not the fear itself that holds us back, it is how we respond to it.

By reframing failure, taking small actions, and using visualization, you can begin to change your relationship with fear of failure and replace that with a sense of possibility and excitement. Your unconscious mind can become your greatest ally when it comes to overcoming obstacles, as long as you are willing to reprogram it to serve your success and take actions.

Remember, every step you take on your entrepreneur journey, it is not about making it perfect. Instead, it is about keeping moving forward.  Now, fear number two is fear of judgment. I know this fear all too well, and I'm sure you've felt it too. It sounds something like, what will my co workers think or my colleagues think if they found out I'm working on a side business? 

What if my friends think I'm crazy for even trying this thing? What if my family doesn't support me or think I'm making a mistake? Here is some tough love for you. People will always have opinions. It doesn't really matter whether you stay in your corporate job forever, taking on a new role, or starting a side business.

Someone, somewhere is going to have something to say about it. But here is the reality. Most people aren't thinking about you as much as you think they are. They are wrapped up in their own worries, challenges, stories, and dreams. They have their own lives to manage. And you are not at the center of other people's world.

It sounds harsh but it is a hard truth and a necessary one. Now, let's say even if people are talking about you, so what? Does their opinion really have the power to stop you from chasing your dreams? And are you going to let someone else's judgment take away your ability to create the life you want? I'm sure the answer should be a resounding no to you.

So why does fear of judgment hold us back? This fear often stems from our deep desire for approval. Most of us have been conditioned to care deeply about how others perceive us. We did that since our childhood. We want to be liked, respected, and validated. But here's the catch. When you base your decision on what others think, you gave away your power.

You let their opinions dictate your actions. And that is the opposite of living a life on your own terms. If you are always worried about what others might think, whether it's your colleagues, friends or family members, you start making choices that are in alignment with their expectations, not your own.

And that is a recipe for living unfulfilled life. When you are able to stop worrying about what others think and instead make decisions based on your own values, your own visions, your own dreams, you'd be much closer to building a business and a life that aligns with who you really are. To help you do that, to overcome the fear of judgment, here is two tips I want to share. 

Tip number one, focus on your why. So why do you want to start your start business? What's driving you to take this leap? Is it to gain financial independence and to have that financial security you always dream about? Is that you have more time for yourself or for your family eventually? Maybe it's about creating something meaningful that actually aligns with your passions.

For example, I started my start business because I wanted to take control of my own career and to create another career path that allows me to diversify my income, to build a meaningful business that can make impact. And ultimately, to create the financial security and even the financial freedom I'm always looking for, for me and for my family.

That purpose kept me going when people doubted me or didn't understand, because their opinion truly didn't matter to me. When your why is so strong and stronger than the opinions of others, that judgment starts to lose its power. It becomes irrelevant to you. So, take a moment right now and ask yourself, what is your why?

Is that strong enough to carry you through moments of doubts and the moments of other people's judgment? Write that down and keep that in a place that you can see and remind yourself all the time. Tip number two, remember this mantra. Other people's opinion don't pay my bills. I know it sounds a little bit harsh, but sometimes we need a reality check.

You are building your side business for you and maybe your loved ones as well. Not for other people's approval, not to gain validation from others, but for your own growth, freedom, and financial security, and your desire and your dreams. So when you start internalizing this mantra, it becomes a powerful motivator. 

Every time you worry about what someone else might think, remember, their opinion do not pay your bills. They are not responsible for your success, but you are. I know it is tough when family or close friends don't fully support you sometimes. But the truth is, you don't need to talk to them about your side business at all.

They are not the ones living your life. Maybe later on they will come around. But until then, pick other topics at family gatherings, ask how they are, be interested in their stories, because you are the one who has to wake up every morning and live your life and build your dream. Do not let anyone's doubt keep you from moving forward.

So next time when you catch yourself worrying about what others think, ask yourself, is this fear serving me, or is that actually holding me back? You might just surprise yourself with the answer.  The fear of judgment is natural, but it doesn't have to control you. When you focus on your own why, surrounding yourself with the right support, and remember that opinions of others don't pay your bills, you will start to feel the shift.

That fear will become smaller, and your dreams and your desire, and what you want to do with your business for your own life will become larger. So stop living for other people's approval and start building the life and the business you've always dreamed of. Fear number three, let's wrap up with this third big fear, which is the fear of not being good enough.

I'm sure this one hits home for many of us. It sounds like, who am I to do this? Why would anyone hire me when there are so many other experts out there? Or I don't have enough experience to call myself a coach or consultant or entrepreneur. If those thoughts sound familiar, you're not alone. This is what we often refer to as imposter syndrome, and it's something almost every high achiever have felt at some point.

The more successful you become, the more this voice in your head can tell you that you don't belong or that you are not qualified enough to be in the room. We all have been there. When I started my fitness coaching business, the thought of I'm not qualified enough came across my mind all the time, especially because I was very experienced and highly qualified financial advisor in my corporate career.

But in my business, I was brand new. I had so much doubt in myself at that time when I first started my fitness coaching business. By then, when I walked with clients, I noticed that my clients actually didn't care about how many years of experience I have had in the fitness industry. Because to them, they saw me as this fitness coach who actually cared about their health and well being, about their goals and progress.

And who knew what I was talking about and could help them achieve their fitness goals. I realized at its core, my fear of not being good enough is rooted in comparison. So when you look at other entrepreneurs, coaches, or business owners, And you see that polished website, well crafted messages, hundreds and hundreds of followers on social media, and a seemingly effortless success.

And then you think, I could never measure up to that. Who am I to do what they do? Or what do I have to offer that's different or valuable to potential clients? The thing is, you are only seeing the end results of others. You're not seeing that behind the scenes struggle. The long hours, the startup, the doubts, the missteps, the learning curve, everyone starts as a beginner.

And even the most seasoned entrepreneurs had to take that first step without being an expert.  The only thing standing between where you are now and where you want to be is the belief that you can do it and the willingness to take actions, even if it's imperfect. Think about this. When you start your corporate career, were you the best from the start?

Of course not. You learned, you made mistakes, and you grew along the way.  The same applies to entrepreneurship, your background, your experience, your passion are what make you unique and what make you uniquely qualified to serve your clients. You have something that no one else has, which is your unique experience, skills, the way of teaching and your perspective, because there is only one unique you on this planet and there's no one else has your exact story and the way that you teach and that's your superpower.

It is natural to want to wait until you feel 100 percent ready, but that's often just your fear trying to keep you safe. Starting is the hardest part. Once you take that first step, things will start to click. You will discover what works, what doesn't, and how to improve. Confidence is actually built through action, and every single thing you do to push forward.

Whether it's reaching out to potential clients, launching your website, launching your program, or even sharing your stories can build your belief in your own abilities. Also remember to celebrate small wins, because each step, no matter how small that is, is a progress.  Whether it's to creating your first social media post or booking a discovery call or brainstorming your business ideas, celebrate it.

These are the building blocks of your success and you should be proud of every step that you take for your own business. Celebrating small wins doesn't just boost your momentum, it also helps to reprogram your brain to focus on progress, not perfection. Every time you achieve something, no matter how small, your confidence grows, and your fear of not being good enough also diminishes as well.

The fear of not being good enough will always be there, especially when you are working on your big vision. The more you take action, celebrate your wins, and own your unique value, The more you will quiet that imposter syndrome and making progress by taking those actions. Remember, the only way to get better is by doing.

So start taking actions before you feel ready. Your career, your experience, your lessons learned, these are the very things that qualify you to serve others. You don't need to be perfect or expert to help others. You just need to be one step ahead of where they are and you've got this.  And there you have it, the three big fears that can hold us back from making our sad business dream a reality.

Whether it's the fear of failure, the fear of judgment, or that nagging feeling of not being good enough, I want you to know this, you are not alone. Every entrepreneur has faced these fears, no matter how successful they are and in every stage of their business. And guess what? Even for the most successful entrepreneur, They still face them today.

The difference is, despite those fears, they keep going anyway.  The key is to acknowledge these fears, not let them control you. And take those small actions and small steps every single day toward the life you want to create. Remember, your thought business isn't about being perfect, it is about progress.

And progress comes from taking actions, even when it's messy and scary. So to wrap up this episode, I want to leave you with this, you've got everything you need within you to succeed. You are more than capable and the world is waiting for what you have to offer. So do not let those fears keep you from making your mark.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this episode. What fear has been holding you back the most and how are you planning to overcome that? Send me a DM on Instagram or LinkedIn at Cindy Excell, I'd love to hear from you. And if you haven't already, make sure to click that subscribe button so you don't miss out on future episodes where we will continue breaking down the barriers that keep you from building the start business that you deserve.

Thank you so much for tuning in today. You've got this and keep going. I'll see you next week. Thank you so much for listening to the Hustle with Heels podcast. I hope this episode has inspired you to take action towards your sad hustle dream. If you enjoyed this episode, please take a second to rate and review it.

Each review helps me help more corporate women and early stage entrepreneurs just like you. Don't forget to take a screenshot, share it in your Instagram stories or on LinkedIn and tag me at Cindy Excell. I will see you next week.