Happy Agent Co. - Real Estate Agent Podcast for Women - Hosted by Lindsay Dreyer, Real Estate Coach

My 6 Do-Overs: What I’d Do Differently If I Were Starting Real Estate Today

• Lindsay Dreyer • Season 1 • Episode 34

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If you’re a new real estate agent—or even a few years in—and wondering how to build a real estate business that actually feels good, this episode is for you.

After 20+ years in the real estate industry, I’ve made my fair share of mistakes (and had a few wins too). In this honest, unfiltered episode, I’m sharing the six things I would absolutely do differently if I were starting my real estate career today. From setting boundaries early to ditching perfectionism and relying on systems before I was drowning, this is the do-over list I wish I had at 21.

We’ll talk about how to:

  • Define what success really means for you (hint: it’s not just sales volume)
  • Build simple systems that support consistency and avoid overwhelm
  • Stop trying to be the “perfect agent” and start being you
  • Nurture your sphere and get more real estate referrals without cold leads
  • Say no to the wrong clients (yes, even early in your career)
  • Delegate and get help before you crash

Whether you're brand new or hitting a mid-career reset, this episode is packed with real-world advice for building a sustainable, profitable, and authentic real estate business—the kind that fits your life and honors your values.

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Speaker 1:

Hello friends, I am so excited you're here today because we are going to dive into the things I would do differently if I were starting in real estate today. Over the past two decades of being in real estate, I honestly wish I had to do over sometimes, because I have learned so much, and I'm hoping that you can learn from my mistakes, or really just lessons learned. For those of you who are tuning in for the first time, I am Lindsay Dreyer. I am a real estate coach, a brokerage owner and a mom of three, and I really believe that you should build a business that you love. Also, if you have not reviewed the podcast, please drop a review wherever you're listening. It's super helpful and helps other listeners find us, and I love hearing from you. So if you want to find me on Instagram it is lindsaydryer or happyagentco and shoot me a DM. I just love to keep the conversation going, so let's dive in.

Speaker 1:

If I could go back and sit across from brand new Lindsay and this was like 21-year-old Lindsay tired, I was nervous, I absolutely had imposter syndrome. I had my arms crossed in my headshot. I really should show you guys my first headshot, because it's really comical and I would love have had her to listen to this episode, because I want her to know that she doesn't have to do it the way that everyone thinks she does and that she doesn't have to earn her stripes through being a stress case and that she gets to build something better sooner. I really think that if I had had some advice or coaching or mentorship earlier in my career, it would have really jump-started my growth. So no regrets, but this is my do-over list and it is everything that I wish I had done differently and the few things that I'm really glad that I got right that I got right.

Speaker 1:

Number one is that I would define my version of success first. For years if you guys want to tune into one of the first episodes my chasing joy story I chased goals and success that wasn't even mine and it looked like I was winning on paper. I had lots of sales, I had lots of clients, it was lots of late nights, but I always felt behind and it really just like came to a head when I had my first kiddo in 2015. And that was when I was like I can't do this anymore. I really need to start defining what success is for me. So I stopped chasing what someone else was telling me, which is a lot of lists being the top producer in your office. Maybe it's a sales volume goal or a GCI number, but when you are defining your own version of success, that is when the rubber really hits the road.

Speaker 1:

So, instead of listening to other people, you decide what you actually want. Is it more free time to do what you want to do? Is it more money so you can make a bigger impact in your world or get things that are going to increase your quality of life? Perhaps it's lifestyle related, maybe it's like having enough money and time to go see a personal trainer or go on vacations, or maybe it's just values. I know for me, freedom is one of my biggest values. Fun is one of my biggest values. So, knowing that and deciding what you actually want time, money, lifestyle, values it is so crucial to then build your business around your version of success. Because if you don't define success, I am telling you the real estate industry will and it will burn you out, and it's it basically makes you think that that's the prize, that you are wealthy and that's all that you are chasing. And I am here to tell you that's not the case, because there's more than just money. There is your time, your energy, your lifestyle and your values.

Speaker 1:

Do-over number two is that I would implement some systems before I was drowning. Would implement some systems before I was drowning. Now, I didn't even really understood what that meant until I had some leads fall through the cracks or some piece of the transaction that I completely missed, and those were my wake-up calls that if I had six concurrent deals going at the same time, I really needed some systems in place. So what do you need? What should you be looking at? Really, it's where do you feel like you need to be more organized and where would you benefit from having some systems?

Speaker 1:

So, set up a CRM, even a basic one. It could be as simple as a Google spreadsheet, but really having everything in one place you're not running around chasing things is so crucial. Also, using templates for everything. So you have your email templates, your text templates, your guides, your listing presentations, your buyer book, anything that you are putting in front of a client on a regular basis. Those need to be templates, and I know you guys are probably tired of hearing me talk about systems, but I would have set some up sooner rather than later and I really didn't hit it until I started a brokerage in 2011. And then I would build a weekly workflow and I would stick to it. Honestly, with the podcast, I have a workflow that I stick to every week. So just knowing how you get work done on a consistent basis is crucial to having systems that support you. Systems don't necessarily make you stiff and inflexible. They honestly make it so you are sustainable, and that's what we're trying to do in our real estate careers is make our success consistent and sustainable.

Speaker 1:

Okay, number three really hits home for me because I would stop trying to be the quote unquote perfect agent or just perfect in general. I am a absolute recovering perfectionist. It is hard, I am telling you, and I spent way too long trying to sound polished and professional and act like I had it all together and I was just faking the funk. I was being someone I'm not, not to say that I'm not professional or polished, but I was trying to be someone that I wasn't and, honestly, that made me forgettable. When I started leaning in to being my authentic, real self, it really helped me attract the kind of clients that I really wanted to work with.

Speaker 1:

So, instead of trying to be perfect, be yourself. Obviously, we can't like let our freak flag fly all the time and there is some instances where I have to tone it down a little bit, which is totally fine. But you can let your personality be who you are. You can share personal stories. You can share your quirks. I love Crocs, by the way I know I'm going to admit it, I'm coming out of the Croc closet. I love them. You can share what your values are. There's the intimacy that's built when you stop trying to be perfect and you start being human. You build trust and people want to know who you are and people like doing business with those that they know like and trust. We hear that all the time. So you don't have to be perfect. Yes, you have to do a great job for your client, but you can be yourself and there is no definition of a perfect agent. So just do you be you.

Speaker 1:

Number four on, what I would do differently if I were starting a real estate list is I would invest in relationships, not random leads. I will tell you, I have thrown tens of thousands, actually maybe even hundreds of thousands of dollars in the past 20 years on leads that did not want to hear from me, and I am not going to name names on where I have spent that money, but I threw all of that money after people who didn't want to talk to me, while I was ignoring the people that were already in my life, who already loved me, who already trusted me and those who possibly have already even worked with me. So this is absolutely one of the do-overs is that you need to nurture your sphere relationships like they are the gold that they are. Show up consistently with value and not just sales. As a real estate professional, you have so many things in your toolkit that are valuable to other people Knowledge about real estate, knowledge about design, knowledge about renovations, knowledge about mortgage financing, knowledge about investing I mean, the list goes on and on and on. So you have inherent value that you can provide to your sphere. So you don't have to be salesy, but you can show up consistently with that value. I know that a lot of people get frustrated because sphere and nurturing and relationships are a long game, especially with the people that already know you. But I will tell you, a referral-based business is one of the most enjoyable businesses to build. I absolutely, wholeheartedly believe that it is such a great way to build a real estate business, because not only is it enjoyable, but it is sustainable. Your future clients aren't strangers. Usually they are already in your phone, so you can start there and start investing in those relationships.

Speaker 1:

Number five is that I would say no sooner to a lot of things, almost everything. Maybe I don't know I don't know if I go that far, but I, early in my career, said yes to everything. Every showing, every 9 pm text message I was responding to things at like midnight, every open house I was doing for someone else's listing and while I was looking successful, I honestly felt like I was drowning because I was just saying yes to everything. I would tell Lindsay, who's doing this over again, that you need to set boundaries from beginning. You need to figure out when your work hours are, what you are going to allow in terms of client behavior, and I would also really tell her it's okay to break up with clients. If they are misaligned or they are draining you, it is okay to walk away. You have to create space to run your business and not just react to it, and setting those boundaries will help you have your business, not run you. You are going to be running your business, and I'm sure you've heard this before. But we teach people how to treat us, you teach people how to treat you and you deserve to be treated like a professional that is allowed to have a life. We are not order takers, we are not fast food, we are service professionals. And what real estate agents let clients get away with compared to a doctor or an attorney is bananas to me. All right.

Speaker 1:

Last, on the what I would do differently list is number six. I would rely on other people sooner, and I know for the control freaks and perfectionists in the room. This is a really hard one. I'd rely on them and I wouldn't do everything myself. I was so proud that I was like the master of the jack of all trades, like I was great at emails, I was great at showings, I was great at marketing, I was great at graphic design, I was great at everything. But when I had a sick kid or I was sick or someone needed help, I didn't have that support system to lean on, and it not only cost me clients and business, it just it was so self-absorbed honestly like to think that another person couldn't step in and help me with my business.

Speaker 1:

So I think you should start delegating. Start delegating early, even if it's five hours a week, even if it's one showing, even if it's one home inspection, and I think that it's practice. It is a muscle that we practice using, because delegation is hard and it absolutely takes practice. So lean on mentors, lean on your peers. You don't have to have staff necessarily, but it's like you could have a virtual assistant for five hours a week, it does not matter. Like however you want to delegate, it is up to you Doesn't mean hiring an employee. It doesn't mean that you have to go straight W-2 for someone, upwork, fantastic, like. I'm sure everyone will give you referrals if you are looking for some kind of support. The other thing is those systems are something that those people can plug into, so they're going to be able to help you even more and delegation is going to be easier because you have those systems in place.

Speaker 1:

I am challenging you to let go of the belief that asking for help means that you're not capable or that your clients will get a subpar experience, because I know that that is just not the case. You are not weak for needing support. You're not a loser, but I do think that you are wise for not pretending that you should or could or can do it alone. So I don't think you have to do it all yourself, and I would definitely rely on other people sooner. So what would I keep doing? Great question.

Speaker 1:

Not everything was a disaster. Obviously, I've had some real estate success. So what would I keep doing? Great question. Not everything was a disaster. Obviously, I've had some real estate success. So there are a few things that I got right and I'm really glad that I did. One of them was that I was always curious and I was always learning. I never thought I knew everything and I would absolutely keep that spirit. I still do now. Like I love learning, I love staying curious about what's going on, following up even when it feels awkward. I was really good at following up with people and I am like I will talk to anybody, like no problem there, but like I definitely would keep following up with people until they told me to that they never want to hear from me again. I would also ask for some help, even when it feels scary. I also will keep showing up, even when it wasn't perfect, because, yes, we have those moments. I think you have to keep showing up in real estate even when the days are hard and long, and so really just showing up is a big one. And, lastly, I would keep leaning into my natural talents, like I have a marketing and operations brain, and I think that throughout my career, I have always leaned into what I love and what I'm good at, and I encourage you to do the same.

Speaker 1:

You get to build your real estate career your way. So, whether you're brand new or you're a few years in, or you're a decade in or two decades in, and you're wondering can I start over? The answer is absolutely yes. You get to do this your way. You get to do this on your terms, with whatever priorities are important to you. So let's recap my do-over list.

Speaker 1:

I would define my version of success. I would build simple systems early. I'd be myself not the quote-unquote perfect agent. I would be better at nurturing my relationships with my sphere. I would absolutely protect my peace and I would ask for help sooner. The truth is, you don't need a new marketing strategy. You need permission to build a business that feels good, not one that just looks good on Instagram, and I really, truly believe that every person has unique talents that they can use to market themselves deliver a great client experience, and it just takes us reflecting on those things. So there you have it. That is what I would do differently if I were starting in real estate today. If you have an agent who would love to listen to this episode, please feel free to pass it along, and until next time, I really hope that you stay happy.

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Lindsay Dreyer

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