Not For Heroes

Permission To Feel

• Yaakov Goldsmith • Season 1 • Episode 1

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In the first episode of Not for Heroes, we sit down with Arky Staiman, an inspiring tour guide and combat soldier.
We talk about his inspiring work, the emotional and mental challenges faced during war, and his journey of self-discovery and resilience amidst conflict.
This was recorded in the field hence the quality 😂
Follow Arky on Instagram at israelwitharky or israelwitharky.com

Music by חברים משער יפו

Hey, thanks for listening to not for heroes. A place to hear stories. from me to him. He came about home. The battlefield. And everything in between. I hope you enjoy. So for this first episode, I sat down with archi stamen. Uh, wonderful person he's full of energy and life and optimism. Just an awesome person to be around. In as a hoot. He is. An excellent tour guide, who you can follow at Israel with Arkie. He hails from Tacoma before that from Baltimore. And he's a wonderful father and husband, and we'll get into all that. Arkie and I met at Yeshiva and oatmeal. Before that he went to Leyva Torah. But more importantly, archi and I cross. A lot of paths this year, because we're in the same hot diva. we're in, what's called where we provide all sorts of, combat aid. Archies in a ton sleeker. basically his job is to search for lost and fallen. We cross a lot of paths on October 7th, eighth, ninth, 10th. We were, we collected our equipment together. We were in closet together. And we spent a lot of downtime together, waiting time. And his presence has always provided me with a strength. So I knew that he'd be someone I would want to sit down with when I had this idea. And I called him around our seventh Beth, our second round. Um, I was in Tacoma and he was in Galot. Um, both the places near the Gaza border. In between. Missions. Our units were in the middle of operating in Jabbar. So I asked my advocate if we had an hour, if I could take the time to sit down with him. So. Hopefully that explains the sound quality. Archi had just gotten back. From a tour. Communicating his experiences to American Jews. Um, And let's hear about that from archi. Hopefully. This encapsulates where we were and what we were feeling. So without further ado. Take it away. Arche.

Arky:

'I'm just trying to figure out, I started with me. With me, with myself. What did I learn from this experience, right? Like, what did I get out of this? What are the things that I want to take with me that, like, and, and, and, and, A lot of the, I've been making videos throughout the war.

Speaker 5:

Yeah. A lot of them.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So a lot of these videos are really just coming down to like, okay, IQ, what are you getting out of this experience? Like, what do you want to share with others? But also like, what am I getting from my own self? And then it's like, okay, I'm learning all these life lessons, let's call it. And, and going through a lot of processing and I've done so much work on myself since the war started that I'm like a different person. So I'm going to take that, like these things that. I feel like I've changed. I was like, everybody can learn from this. You know, it's not just me. Everybody can, can learn from this. And if you're, if it speaks to you, you take it upon yourself. And if it doesn't, you say, okay, that was our kids experience.

Yaakov:

Yeah. And it's, I've found that like the reason I've connected to you and I'm sure everyone does is like, That you're still a gap bridger. Like, it's like, it's insane. I find that the gap, it's a canyon between the people that are here and in it and the people that aren't. Even though they want, they want the gap to be bridged. I don't know how you managed to do that.

Speaker 2:

I think it's, it's an emotional gap where people were like, We're feeling something so different than what you're feeling. Like I'm just talking about like, let's say Jews in America versus Jews in Israel. We're feeling something so different. We're feeling so much care but such a disconnect of like hopelessness.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And it was that coma of like, we're frozen. They were all froze. I think the Jewish community in America, if I could speak for them, even though I wasn't there, was in a place of like, what do we do? For the first. And I'm putting out these things like, hey, you know, we're not walking around depressed, somber, you know, just scrolling through terrible videos every day. Every single person here has like, Doing something, you know, and we're happy like the soldiers. I remember the first few weeks like the Avira the environment was very like uplifting Okay, they need that too. Yeah

Speaker:

Permission to feel it exactly say that

Arky:

that's what it's actually interesting. I never thought of it like that Until a couple of times when I was giving speeches in America like rabbis would introduce me They would talk about that Friday night video that I made. It was a video about like Kabbalat Shabbat We'll go rock the house. And that's the word that kept on coming. I was like you're giving us permission To feel, to be okay, to be happy And it's like, that, that's what we needed, you know what I mean? And, and it's hard to upkeep that over, you know, nine months, wherever we are now. Oh my gosh. Um, but that's, that's kind of what I was doing going to America and just trying to keep that feeling alive of like, let's keep those spirits up. You know, people are always asking me, how many, how many hostages do you think are still alive? I have no idea, but my answer is we have to be in a morale that's so high that even if they're not, we're still all in, you know, we're still a hundred percent there.

Speaker:

Totally.

Speaker 2:

And that's kind of like what I'm trying to get to is like the morale of all of this.

Speaker:

Yeah. Yeah. It's powerful for me. No, that's like, that's where I feel like I need the push in the morale. Yeah. Everyone does. But you're right that there is like a sense of like talking in the units, like. That's like what keeps me afloat, it's just like the laughter and the whatever that like only we could like, but everyone should be let in on that. Right. That's what I do. I think

Speaker 2:

also from, for us specifically because we deal with, you know, we're search and rescue for fallen soldiers is the way I like to explain our, our mission. Yeah. And so since our mission, you know, seems so depressing and sad, you see somebody like me or my unit who's seen so much, done so much, you know, we were there on October 7th. Right. We're happy still. We're still people. Like we still, we're still, we're okay. We're good. You know, I can't speak for everybody, but at least in my experience and my team's experience, like we're still good. And I think for outsiders to see that, like, I know what you went through and I still see the smile on your face. Like if you can smile, it's the permission. It goes back to that permission.

Yaakov:

Yeah. I think, yeah, it's crazy. we overlapped a lot. It was, it was like, uh, I didn't know that we were in the same Khatibah. I had no idea. It's funny, like, I also, I didn't really even understand the structure of my Miloim service in the world. I still don't

Speaker 5:

understand it. I

Speaker 2:

still don't.

Speaker:

Like,

Speaker 2:

you're like, I'm in the same Khatibah. I'm like, okay, let me say

Speaker 5:

so. People ask me, like, what

Speaker 2:

do I do? I'm like, Yesal Tijim Shmona. They're like, which is what? I'm like, I don't know. I can explain to you what I do. I can't explain to you how it fits in, in the bigger picture. Totally. I know we're in the same Khatibah. It's also

Speaker:

shocking also, like, that we ended up here. That's what shocks me. I was in Shmulamot Tishim in Tzankhaneim. Right. What was your geuse?

Speaker 2:

Mertz HaChatzle. That's beautiful for me. That's what I'm about to say.

Speaker:

And, uh, I had no, I don't think I even knew a unit like this existed. I mean, I'm in your short, which is like the convoys you're such a rescue. We've worked together. I've worked with most

Speaker 2:

people who get to me and are not doing exactly what they were doing before. I had no idea how much, I had no idea how much goes into war, like logistics and like everybody always asked the question, the kids, whenever I went to speak to schools, how many people did you kill? Do you know how many people, how many soldiers, combat soldiers whose job it is in the army Is not to kill people. I don't know the percentages, but it's such a high percentage.

Speaker:

Totally. No, not at all. Did you ever wish you were in a different unit?

Speaker 2:

Interesting question. Um, not, not because of the work that we did. Sometimes because of the lack of work. Right? Yeah. Like, because sometimes you feel like you're sitting and you wanna be giving more and Totally. I, I hate to use this phrase over and over and over again, but this is also something that I talked about and I still talk about, which is everybody feels like they're not doing enough.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Like I sat, I stand in the room. In front of 500 Americans, I asked them, How many of you feel like you've done enough? Nobody's going to answer their hand. But if I was stood in the same room with 500 elite duvdevan soldiers who have done the most insane, you know, missions, they also wouldn't raise their hand. You know what I mean? We all feel like we're not doing enough. So like, there's this, there's this foam on my head like if I was somewhere else, I'd be doing more. But I think that's all in my head.

Speaker:

Yeah, I think the word enough, it's a hard word to feel like you're not doing enough, I am enough, I'm a good enough dad, I'm a good enough partner, it's impossible.

Speaker 2:

It's not, it's not healthy because then you're striving for something that doesn't exist. Totally. Right. Cause you're like, I haven't done enough, but you'll never do enough. So like what exactly are you looking for? I'll never forget when the heart, literally, I mean, you know what I saw and what we did. And the hardest thing that happened to me was we, we, we started a mission and, and At the border, they're like, Arky, we need your spot on the Hummer. And they kicked me off the Hummer. And like, it's like, the Okits guys took over and like, and then just went in. That is hard. And I just stood there like. I feel useless. I really know that feeling. And I was so pumped to get you. This was before any of our missions were inside of Gaza. So this was the first mission we were supposed to do inside of Gaza. And you were really itching to do something. I was itching to do something. It's early and I'm like, you know, we're like singing, you know, songs on the way down. And boom, Arki, we need your spot. I was crushed by that. And that's the feeling of like, I'm not doing enough. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then. I had to come to the realization that, and this is, I call it the goalie effect, right? Were you a goalie? I was a goalie in high school. Yeah. The goalie effect is like this, right? You're sitting there as a goalie and you don't want to work, right? Because if you're working, that means that the team's not doing well. But you also don't want to stand there doing nothing. That's how we feel. That's a great

Speaker:

analogy.

Speaker 2:

So you're sad. Like we only, we only work if something bad happens, but we're still itching to like. Do you know that's when the missions with hostages became start really really important like that we would start taking out fallen hostages from from the different battlefields and it was like that was a whole nother feeling because It wasn't, it wasn't because disaster struck, meaning disaster struck a long time ago. Does that make sense? Yeah. Like, there, there isn't this feeling of like, this is tragic. The problem already exists

Speaker:

and now I want to jump to do it. Exactly. By the way, you changed my, you gave me a paradigm shift. I'm not, I can't even realize how much you affected me. I'm listening. I mean, we could also dive into all the times we overlapped, but one of the days in Kfar Azza. Yeah. And you were, and I was kind of like in the mindset of like, okay, my job right now is Afdakha, I'm securing the area. Right. And it was, but in addition, like there was, there was work to do. There was mitzvahs to be done. Yeah. And you, that's what you said to me. Did I? You said, that's a mitzvah. He said, I was like, kind of nervous. I was like, what, there's bodies and I'm scared and you were like, it's a mitzvah. I'm running to it. It's something like that. Yeah. He said to me, it's, it's shifted my mindset. It sounds like something I would say. It's a huge, just, I'm really grateful I was there and I'm like, there's so many like layers, like different moments that went into like bringing me there and like, yeah. I'm really grateful I

Speaker 2:

was there. We were supposed to be there. You know what I mean? Like, we were supposed to be there. Yeah. For whatever reason, we were supposed to be there. Yeah. That's true. I like to say my line is, I've done more Mitzvahs in the last seven months than I have my entire life combined. Yeah. It's like,

Speaker 5:

you

Speaker 2:

know, just, just everything, you know, between, thank God, having a platform to inspire people and the actual work that we do, so. Yeah. It's, it's a fulfilling feeling, and I think that's a, this is, Again, one of the things that my motto right now is a lot of, a lot of people will talk to soldiers and they'll, they'll focus on how are you negatively impacted by this? How do you sleep at night? How do you do this? How do you do that? Did your soldier, did your friends die? It's like Those are important because we're all affected negatively by the war, but nobody's asking like, what were your greatest accomplishments? What's the moment that you're most proud of? What is your

Speaker 5:

moment?

Speaker 2:

So I have, I have a few, but every soldier needs to be asked, and we did this during processing on the one at the end of Seven Valor. They um, they gave us a timeline. They gave us green stickers and red stickers. You did that? So I learned a lot from that, which is like, there are green stickers that you should be proud of, that you need to take with you, and like, every soldier has that deep inside, but like, nobody's bringing it out of them. Everybody's asking them like, how did this screw you over? Like, how are you messed up from this? Like, how did this build you? How are you different because of this? What were the moments that like, you, You impressed yourself. That goes back to the permission thing.

Speaker:

Even us, we're scared to feel permission to feel proud or accomplished or good about something because it's such a hard time.

Speaker 2:

Maybe. I think we're just not accessing it. It's so deep inside. I have a few moments. I think, I think one of, one of the moments was in Kfar Aza when like everybody else was kind of losing it at the end of the day and like they had enough and it was physically difficult and everything and I, and I was just like, I, I was so zoned in, I was so dialed in and I became like a different person and I just picked up stretchers and I just, I kept on going and I didn't, until the moment we left Kfar Aza, I didn't, I took breaks, but I didn't stop, you know what I mean? I didn't stop. I was so zoned in. Another moment was, we had this, this mission in Khan Yunus where we were digging up, uh, bodies in a cemetery to try and bring back, uh, fallen hostages. And, um, it was such a crazy mission because it was not an area that was safe at all. And they were just like, there was birds flying overhead. There were tanks shooting next to us. Like it was a real battle. And our job was just to look down. down. Like, imagine we had stick lights on our head so that the, we wouldn't have any friendly fire. Infrared stick lights

Speaker 5:

or?

Speaker 2:

No, straight up like glow sticks. Oh, so your position is totally. Exactly. And, and there's buildings surrounding us that are still like totally, it's all Hamas. I know what the deal is. And I know, and I know it's

Speaker:

not good

Speaker 2:

So what happened was we just, the tank opened up the back of the tank and there's just total chaos around. And I just remembered, like, I don't think I raised my head from looking down doing what I had to do for like two hours, including like, Tanks firing shells over our head, you know what I'm saying? There's fireworks going on! And any of those bullets could be aimed at you, but I I just remember just being super And for me, ADHDarchy. To focus on anything was like a big deal, but I We were so Dialed in and I just, so I take, I go back and I say like the best Archie showed up that night.

Speaker:

That's amazing. And I'm proud of

Speaker 2:

myself for that. You should be, that's

Speaker:

awesome. Everybody should be. That's amazing. I always

Speaker 2:

say like with my tourists, right, like, a lot of times I'll take families and the kids will come to Israel and they'll, they'll like change. Like the parents will describe their kids, like, oh they hate history, they don't like hiking, they don't like this, they don't like that. And then they come to Israel and they're like, the parents discover a whole new child. And I feel like we're also, like, in a way, we're able to discover parts of us that we Either we didn't know what we had or we didn't have.

Speaker:

I grew up with like all the stories of the Six Day War and the, you know, and now it's up to us. I don't think I ever really thought it was reality. But I was always inspired by those stories. And now it's really there. It's great. I don't know. What, what, how is your like perception of your Zionism? Has your Zionism changed do you feel?

Speaker 2:

Has my Zionism changed? I think, um, I think my, my, Your

Speaker:

relationship towards the army? My relationship

Speaker 2:

towards, I wouldn't say Zionism or Israel has changed because I've always been like, not always, but ever since I, I grew up Yeshivish. I didn't grow up, you know, there was no Israel flag on our house, like none of that. Your

Speaker:

parents weren't Zionists.

Speaker 2:

My parents love Israel,

Speaker:

and loved

Speaker 2:

Israel, but like, they were yeshiva, there was no It's

Speaker:

like this thing on the hilltops that's far away. Yeah, we went for my

Speaker 2:

bar mitzvah, there's kfarim, there's holy places, there's the kotel, but there was no, like Not much talk about army or anything like that. So I discovered that on my own. What

Speaker:

number are you of the siblings?

Speaker 2:

Um, second and last. Oh, you're two. You guys are two. We're just two. You're one older brother? My older brother, yeah. Okay. Who also ended up in Tiju Mishmona during this war, which is fascinating. So

Speaker:

he went to the army before you?

Speaker 2:

He went to the army before me. He was a job make for six months in a He taught English.

Speaker:

Okay. Do you feel like that kind of shaped your feelings about the army or the Was it before

Speaker 2:

me? I don't know. It wasn't before me. I went in the army. I did the army. So

Speaker:

you were there at the same time. We were there

Speaker 2:

at the same time. We have a picture of us in Machane Netan in Be'er Sheva. Both in uniform. We were both in there at the same time. Okay, so

Speaker:

what sparked it? What was it?

Speaker 2:

Um, trips to Israel. I came here for my Bar Mitzvah. Saw soldiers, came from Malchach, saw soldiers, and just every time I was just like mind blown, you know, and part of my trip to Israel was my trip to America this, this, uh, this past month, I went to a lot of the high schools and a lot of the middle schools and talked about that journey from being a kid just like them, with crappy Hebrew, just like them, with like no particular, like, Like, wow, you know, obsession with Israel to this kid who was like, yeah, I'm going to do the army. Yeah. How'd you

Speaker:

end up at Otniel? That's where we met.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So I went to, I went to Lev HaTorah. And I loved it, but I wanted to do Yeshiva. I wanted to go all in and Rav Yair was there, so I went all in, you know. It was really like, uh, jumping in the deep end. And the truth is, I look back and I was like, it was intense. I didn't know what was going on for eight months. You know what I mean? I had no

Speaker:

clue. Did you go and, so you did Tzankhaneidid Gibush Tzankhaneim? Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Did

Speaker:

you ever want anything more? Sayeret?

Speaker 2:

Looking back, I probably would have. Um, would have done something more, but now, but, but at the time I just wanted to stay in Hesder. I didn't want to do it for years.

Speaker:

Did you have a good group of guys who chose to do Tanchanim from Yeshiva?

Speaker 2:

Yes, but a lot of them ended up in Sayeret. So like, we actually, I actually only ended up with like one guy from Yeshiva. My good friends from, from the army are not guys that went to Yeshiva. Yeah. Cool.

Speaker:

Yeah. Interesting. And,

Speaker 2:

and now they're here with me in Milrin.

Speaker:

Not

Speaker 2:

all, but there's a five, six core guys that I'm

Speaker:

with, yeah. So, I don't know,

Speaker 2:

I never really thought about it too much. Like, I always talked about it as if it was, you know, Ancient history, right? You talk about these like multi front wars that they tried to wipe us off the map. Yeah, the world, you know, we're, we're there, you know,

Speaker:

when the Bach you trained for it, like, don't you remember, like, you have to memorize all the Roman Calim and you remember, like, the story? I never did any of that. I'm sure I had to, but I, there was some sort of like fantasy that like, I don't know, when you're storming a hill and shooting it, what was your

Speaker 2:

negative? Yeah. Good times. Did they give you a negative now?

Speaker:

Uh, no. Well, that's because I was a significant hummer. I'll grab a negative if you have a negative. We have Pakala, so we don't have Pakala. Yeah, yeah. That's a whole different question. We don't have

Speaker 2:

Pakala, man. We just have, I mean, we're doing other things. You have a

Speaker:

covenant, no? At least you have a covenant. Oh, you're like me, uh, bare bones. Just like you. Just like you. Yeah, yeah. That's a whole different question. Now, I was also going to get to that. It doesn't bother me, yeah. It doesn't bother you? Like, in terms of your faith in the system and the, how much the system supports you back for as much as you want to give. Yeah. Um,

Speaker 2:

listen, when, when I got there on October 7th, I expected there to be like, nothing for us. Like, uh, you have all these stories of, they didn't have enough guns, and uh, we don't keep a war, and didn't have helmets for everybody, no food for anybody. So like, the fact that we got there and every single person got the equipment necessary to fight, in a relatively misuda way. I was actually really impressed. Hey, fine, we're not getting the best stuff, you know, you're not getting the ninja, you know. Okay, fine. Fine. You know, it's not the biggest deal in the world. So I, I didn't, I don't feel, there's always been like a, I don't understand the big army thing. Um, but this has been a situation where I feel like we were taking care, we were properly prepared.

Speaker:

Yeah. I would say. I would say that\ we probably feel similarly like when certain people talk negatively about the army's ability to supply Equipment. I always felt weird being like a beggar like, oh, we need like We have everything. Like people ask me, do you have everything? I'm like, I answer, we have everything. We have everything. I want people to feel such freedom. Absolutely right. And

Speaker 2:

then there's a, we're doing a disservice. Soldiers, they get up there, we don't have this, we don't have that. Yeah, I'm with you. It's, it's a problem. There are

Speaker:

problems, and there's tons of problems, by the way.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

But I'm with you. But I'm with you. I actually brought that up on my speeches, because I think a lot of Americans are confused by that. Like, why? Is the army not giving you helmets?

Speaker 5:

Why is the army not

Speaker 2:

giving you bulletproof vests? The army is giving us this is only my experience. I'm sure that people have had worse experience in different experiences And the army is a big place and I can only talk about my our specific place in the army Was it the best stuff?

Speaker 5:

Oh, was it the most

Speaker 2:

updated stuff? No. Is it better to have good stuff? This is another part. It's like, by you giving us better stuff and donating better stuff, it makes our ability to fight better. It really does. It could save lives. But it's not because the army is not giving it to us. It's because we want the best.

Speaker:

Yeah, I'm with you on that. Okay, so back to the Bach. So you were a Negev. We didn't believe there was war. I'm with you. Like, I think it was kind of like we were, it was playing. I kind of wanted it in a way.

Speaker 2:

Totally.

Speaker:

I kind of wanted it. Like after I'm like,

Speaker 2:

okay. Now, now where do I, you know, which, which war, you know, who am I fighting?

Speaker:

Yeah. Did he do, where'd you do? Where was there?

Speaker 2:

Uh, we went Hebron and we were in Lebanon. On the border of Lebanon. That was it. It was a very quiet service. Yeah,

Speaker 5:

yeah.

Speaker 2:

Very quiet service. And the truth is that there was again that feeling of like, I didn't do enough. I didn't do enough. Wow. Interesting. What did I do? Okay, I got some rocks thrown at me. Like, that's what I did in the army. You know what I mean? Oh, that's interesting. And in a way, the war, you know, opened up that That world of like, okay, now you can't say you haven't done real stuff, you know what I mean? And there's a part of me, it goes back to the goalie, there's a part of me that like wants to be a part.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And, and a part of me that's like, okay, you know, it's war, you know, you still can get hurt, and you have a family and kids. But um, I think, I think we were born for this, you know what I mean? You're not born to fight. I think like, we've, we've directed our lives in a certain way that said if we're needed by the state of Israel, by the people of Israel, we're willing to put our lives on the line. So when the day came, it wasn't like

Speaker:

It wasn't a question.

Speaker 2:

There was no question! There was no question and there was also no like sadness about it either. Totally. It was like And every mission, you know, we're in the Hummer and you look around and you see a bunch of people who want to be there.

Speaker:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean.

Speaker:

A million percent. Was there a point that you were like most scared? Most like, whoa, what am I doing here?

Speaker 2:

It's interesting. I didn't feel fear. Wow. I didn't feel fear. And we had scary moments. I didn't feel fear. Okay, good. And I, and I go back to that like, Fulfilling your Tafkid sort of, sort of approach, which is like, yeah, you're doing, you're doing what you're supposed to be doing. So sacrifice is just a part of it. Yeah. Yeah. I mean,

Speaker:

I feel like I felt more scared for my family than for me.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I felt scared that, um, the relationships would change. I felt scared that I would come back and people would see a different, I feel like I was scared that I would change.

Speaker 5:

I

Speaker 2:

was scared that my personality wouldn't be the same, that maybe like, you know, I'm a fun guy, I like to have fun and jokes and be, be positive, like maybe now I'm gonna walk around depressed, you know what I mean? That, that was the fear. Totally, I relate to that. But not physical harm fear or anything like that.

Speaker:

Has, has your personality changed? Depends who you ask. Depends who you ask. Okay. I've

Speaker 2:

matured. I've matured. I don't know how much of the maturity is just I've been working on myself. Like, I started therapy since the war. I went to, I went to, um, retreats down south in the desert. Three days without phones, ice baths, yoga, uh, breath works. I've been starting to do breath work and stuff. So, um, My, my relationship with myself has changed. Okay. And I think that changed my personality. It's not what I went through, it's how I'm dealing with what I went through.

Speaker:

Okay. Does that make sense? Totally. So that doesn't sound like we're the worst, by the way. No. You're intentional, you're mindful, you're looking

Speaker 2:

at yourself. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. I'm more, it's a maturity. Yeah. It's a maturity. So, like, previous arc, you just, like, went through life and handled the curveballs and, like, now it's much more Mindful.

Speaker:

Was it like a similar trajectory, like your relationship with your wife, kids change in that way?

Speaker 2:

Huge. Like maturity? Maturity. I don't know about kids because they're young and going through this has been hard for them. Totally. But basically between round one and chapter two as we call it,

Speaker 5:

um,

Speaker 2:

we had like two months where I worked a lot and I went to America and we went through some crazy things but like we also put. Rebuilding our relationship as like a priority.

Speaker:

Wow, good for you. Huge! It was huge. Good for you.

Speaker 2:

And we needed it because there was an imbalance there. Nobody talks about that stuff but like, If your home front isn't Quiet and peaceful.

Speaker:

You can't do anything. Nothing. Nothing.

Speaker 2:

And when people ask me, how can I help the soldiers, I'm like, go, you know, go do a barbecue for the wives. Go give the kids, you know, go give the kids a day. Send a wolf.

Speaker:

Get on Wolton. Send a wolf.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah. So, so there's been a, there's been a really sweet single,, woman who has been cooking. For my wife and kids. Wow. And when I went around America, they'd be like, how do you help? Look, here she is.

Speaker:

Nice, nice. That's the truth. She's been helping all the families. Yeah, yeah. I think we're

Speaker 2:

at like 80.

Speaker:

Oh, wow. That's a

Speaker 2:

lot. At this point during the war. In the beginning it was a lot. You have to realize that Toccoa also has people in the agmar, so that means that there are people who are protecting Toccoa who live in Toccoa. Yeah. So those people Once, once the war started, if they didn't have Miluim, they volunteered. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So, your own, you know, your own, your own, and all the guys, all the Americans. Yeah. They basically were like, well, I'm not sitting here doing nothing when there's a war. And so they volunteered to protect Toccoa. Yeah. Their, their experience is so different than ours though. It's so different. That's true. They're, they're sleeping at home at night. They're, they have this weird balance where they're in the army, but they're also at home. Yeah, their work asks things from them because they come around their home. Like, yeah, here it's very different.

Speaker:

Yeah, it's very different. Yeah. Yeah, and I don't envy their position.

Speaker 2:

No, it's complicated. It's more complicated.

Speaker:

Yeah, I feel like I've kind of been in that position in the past like a couple of years, like the second chapter. Yeah, when did you guys start? We started again, uh, Pesach. Yeah, same. Oh, yeah. Makes sense. Makes sense. One day we're going to understand it. Makes sense. But, uh,

Speaker 2:

So I came, I got drafted and then a week later left for America.

Speaker:

Oh, okay.

Speaker 2:

Because I had this trip planned. Good for you. And I said to my commander, I said, if you really need me, I'll stay. But like, this is a big deal. And I left. That's good for you. Yeah.

Speaker:

No, things can get, things are going to get done. Like, yeah, we've been on this like rotational, like on and off service, which has been challenging just to have no predictability, but, but it hasn't been, uh, it's not like taxing like those first few weeks where you like, you're not out for the first few weeks. Right. Yeah. Right. Yeah. About that stuff. Like, yeah. How have you managed? It's funny. I actually remember we had to talk about it because we were in a school. And there were days that Volleyball. Volleyball. Volleyball, I missed that volleyball. I still, you still have that picture of you? Yes! Awesome. There's just, yeah, that's a dissonance for me. I feel weird. Telling people like, yeah, there's hostages, there's war, people are dying, and like, I'm playing volleyball. And like, what else are you supposed to and, and, back to the FOMO, like, we felt the FOMO to not do more. But on the other hand, like, what the hell else are we supposed to do? Like, we're literally waiting every second they can call us, and you You go fetch faster than us. Because there could be some sort of search and rescue minion. For us, it's usually convoy missions that need to go deep, go bomb, send bombs, send whatever, but So how did you like, so this was our debate. I said I'm afraid to tell my home about that stuff. I was like, she's like struggling and I'm playing volleyball, but you said I tell everything. I really respected that. Yeah. How did you come to that? And have you done it from day one, from October 7th? We've always

Speaker 2:

been like that. That's our relationship. Always been like that. And when I go off to meet Lillian for training, I tell her what's going on. Yeah. We've always been like that. So on. Um, actually on October 7th, a couple of months beforehand, we had a training mission where somebody came and talked to us about the mental health aspect and somehow it came up like to like do some kind of audio journal, just like talk

Speaker 5:

into

Speaker 2:

your phone. So I actually have recorded every day where we had a mission, recorded everything that we did with how I felt and what it was like and the entire war essentially audio journaled onto my phone.

Speaker:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

Um, And it was very clear to me that, like, I wanted everybody who cared about me to hear it. Whoever, whoever could handle it. You know what I mean? So it was very clear, yeah. My wife knew everything that we were doing. And, and also, like, for her to get to know what I'm going through. So that when I come home, she gets a good, better idea of, like, Who is this Archie that's coming home? Is it gonna be, like, upset that he didn't do more? Has he been having fun playing volleyball? Is it a mixture of both? Is he in shape? Is he out of shape? Is he feeling good about himself? Is he not feeling good about himself? Maybe he's going to come home as a surprise, right? So I think I was part of it. We've always been like that. We'll continue to be like that.

Speaker:

That's awesome. I remember one of the challenges being like bridging that gap between the two different experiences we've had. Because also your wife's been through something like doing everything alone, having to worry the anxieties, managing emotions with this whole new world, Azakot, do you have any Azakot? We

Speaker 2:

had a few Azakot and in the beginning they weren't letting people out of their shoes. Couldn't go out of the issue. Couldn't come back in for a week or two. Whoa. It wasn't clear that it was safe to drive on the roads. It wasn't clear whether they would be doing the same thing to us. I started locking the door for the first time. We never locked the door. You don't like the door.

Speaker:

You're like,

Speaker 2:

yeah, that's, that's, that's why people choose to call it that kind of living. It's like, we don't lock our cars, you know, everybody know each other. And then. It's like, okay, are they are explaining the same thing around us, right? So that was a real fear in the beginning and there was a total disconnect between what she went through and what I was going through.

Speaker:

Yeah, I

Speaker 2:

had to, I had to focus on

Speaker:

It's not wrong. It's just What I had to do, but at a

Speaker 2:

certain point that blew up because there's only so much the two people who are usually on the exact same page who are living completely separate lives So the two of us can do it, right? Like we're, we're one, we're a family, we're a unit. And here I am like focusing on me and just me and what I have to do and the war and like there was zero recognition of what was going on over there. I can say, Oh, I'm so sorry. That sucks. That sounds really hard, but you know, I wasn't really understanding what was going on. Totally. And so that's, that's part of what I'm saying is that two in seven valve. Instead of bet like we worked on a relationship

Speaker:

a ton. Wow.

Speaker 2:

Had to.

Speaker:

Good for you. Do you have any feelings about how She communicated to your kids what was going on? Because you weren't there to do that.

Speaker 2:

That was her job. Her job became, like, forget about, really, like, forget about me, forget about she couldn't watch any of the videos, she couldn't care even about, like, Ami's child. She just cared about the family and the house. I'm like, it was her job to teach the kids about what was going on. Same approach we have for each other, we have with the kids. It's full disclosure with the kids.

Speaker 5:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

My, my six year old daughter knows what I do. Wow. She knows what I do in the army. She knows that I bring back soldiers who are not, no longer alive. Like she knows that. And, and she has questions about it and she wants to know, but like, it's important, it's important. So, so me and my wife kind of like talked about it, but really it was her, it was her, it was her free, right? Like her house. You know what I mean? Yeah. I, that was part of the difficulties of coming back after. Oh, I totally. It's not your house. Oh my God. It's not your

Speaker:

rules. It's like, who are you anyway? Totally. You're not used to that division of labor. Yeah. It's like, where's my place?

Speaker 2:

Right. Right. And she's not used to having you there. No, she's not. She was able to do it by herself. And now you're coming in and it's like, where am I in all this?

Speaker:

Totally. Wow. Right? So that's also part of your role, working on a relationship. Huge,

Speaker 2:

huge part of it. What's your role now in the family? And I have a four year old who very much disconnected from me in the war. Very much disconnected, you know, just like took big steps back for me during the war and and that's just something that I had to Deal with like, yeah, Abba's not there for me all the time. So yeah, so now I can't rely on him That's right. Yeah, or my two year old who points to the to the phone and goes Abba, Abba Really?

Speaker:

The

Speaker 2:

life of a soldier, right?

Speaker:

The war life balance. My

Speaker 2:

four year old used to ask, he used to ask my wife, he says, Why do we need Abba? Captain asked me, why do we need AMA? I was like, is

Speaker 5:

that

Speaker 2:

painful? No, you know, he's got language issues. Okay. And I think he's trying to say like, why does the army need AMA? Oh, okay. I think. Okay. But I don't really know. Like, he's saying to him, why do we need AMA? And I'm just like, we love AMA. He's just, he's just not understanding. Like he's here. He's not here.

Speaker:

It's hard. My, my, sorry. What would, how did you like? take the whole like, how did they communicate to you? First of all, when did you get out? When was the first, Pentecost, when did that end? We finished on February.

Speaker 5:

Oh, and then February,

Speaker:

same time, same time. And then you said also Pesach, how did you take it when they told you? when your Refahet said, Takshivu, we're going back, it's Pesach time, we gotta be called back. I think

Speaker 2:

we knew that, I think there was something that like we kind of knew that something was happening. Yeah. I don't remember what it was, we kind of knew. It sucked because my in laws were home and they were home also, they were in our house on October 7th also, so like, that created also different like, relationship balances between my mother in law and my wife and whatever, but um, I knew that I had this America trip. So my initial reaction was, what do I do?

Speaker:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

What do I do? Do I now contact 50 schools and schools and say, I'm not coming? Right. Or am I going to be sitting on my tuchus for two months saying, why am I not changing the world? Yeah. And instead I'm sitting on my butt in Ofakim, you know what I mean? Yeah, totally. So I said to myself, let's see what this looks like, and I took about a week to like really figure out like, what are we going to be doing? And I realized based off of like the rotations, I would only be like one or two weeks actually involved during the month that I'm gone anyways, and I'll come right back. Yeah.

Speaker:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

And that was my decision.

Speaker:

Good for you. Yeah. And

Speaker 2:

then while I was gone, our unit brought back seven, seven fallen hostages. I don't know if you remember that week, the week before they got the live hostages, right? But

Speaker:

you were part of the It was like seven. It wasn't just like my

Speaker 2:

unit, it was like seven. Yeah, it could have been you. So I'm sitting there in America, in West Hempstead, talking about how my guys are bringing back hostages. Okay. It was crazy. I don't regret it though. I told every single person before I left, I said, I'm going on one condition, that you do nothing

Speaker:

cool while I'm gone.

Speaker 2:

Nothing cool while

Speaker:

I'm gone. A sick mission. Exactly.

Speaker 2:

But I think that goes back to this idea of like, everybody wants to be involved. Yeah. Everybody wants to do more. Totally.

Speaker:

Has that ever brought. Have you ever thought that that mindset of wanting to do more like the Khotr mindset? Yeah, you ever think that that had its downsides? Sometimes our guys were worried like the Magad It is like, uh, aspiring for more than we're capable of. So, for

Speaker 2:

sure, our Mempey, our Mfekeplugada is the same thing. He's always trying to do more. But that's the reason we were in Kfar Azeh. Right. That was not our mission. Yeah. We went down there just to, like, And I'm grateful for that. lend a hand. Right. So, I'm actually so with him on that. Um, I would say, like, with me, is kind of what we talked about before, is, like, when you're so xote that you want to be involved in every little thing, Yeah. And you can't be. Then you get frustrated.

Speaker 5:

Yeah,

Speaker 2:

and you have to learn how to live with that frustration except the fact like I'm not in Gaza doing the mission that I need to, that I could have been doing, and that's okay.

Speaker:

Yeah, well sometimes I think that the whole system only works because of Khotrim, like because like, like individuals who give it their maximum and like they sometimes I think that's the whole system. It's just built up of a bunch of individuals trying their hardest. It's

Speaker 2:

a combination of that and knowing where your boundaries are. Like, right? Like, your job is to do this. Don't do somebody else's job. You will get killed. Totally. Right? So you have to

Speaker:

hope that people have those boundaries.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

Random ma or my brother's Maga, like my little brother is in Soir. Yeah. You wanna hope that his MAGA is like making the right decisions? Like he said that they, whatever he said that they almost had a mission to like literally go like put up an Israeli flag somewhere and it's like, dude, that's not a life or death mission right now. In re Yeah, but like. You want to hope that these individuals that are making these decisions are doing it right.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Yeah. And, and in a way, like we can only control what we're, you know, I'm such a small part of this bigger system that for me to start questioning, like, why did the Magad do this and Machat do this? Like, I can't go there.

Speaker:

No, for sure. You can go down a rabbit hole. It's terrible. Right. So you just say to yourself,

Speaker 2:

like, I have my role. What is my role? Be the best at my job and do it. The best I can, and be ready if I'm never called, you know, that's

Speaker:

Requires a lot of faith.

Speaker 2:

You don't have a choice. What other option do you have? Like, what other option do you have? Start, like, going into the Nefargim's room in the middle of the debris and be like,

Speaker:

Nah, I'm going this way! No, No, you're so right. It's, you have to let go. That's, it's like such a voda to let go.

Speaker 2:

Accept your role in the, in the war. Accept, and that's, everybody needs to have that. Accept your role in the war and excel at it.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I think that's, that, people are so focused on either expanding or shrinking or changing their role.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Accept your role. Figure out what your role is. Accept it and then go for it 150%. Yeah. Oh,

Speaker:

and just, yeah. It's like that for

Speaker 2:

Americans too. It's like They're so like worried, like maybe I should be doing this, maybe I should be doing this, maybe I should be doing this. Accept what you bring to the table, bring it to the table, and do it 150%.

Speaker:

That's how, yeah, it's that classic like. Duality, even in self growth, like between acceptance and wanting to change. Striving, right. But it's interesting that you brought that to the army. I think you're right.

Speaker 2:

I'm finding that balance a little bit. Like, do

Speaker:

your a million percent, and like, and do everything you can, but also accept what you can't. In your

Speaker 2:

role. Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Especially because that's also not the Israeli mentality. The Israeli mentality is like, I think

Speaker:

that that's the fuel of the army.

Speaker 2:

Right? So like, So I'm not that way, it's just not my personality. Right, like, my personality is not to start like questioning the system and doing a di I did do that like with Judaism, where it's like questioning the system and religion and stuff like that. But, um, I don't know, there's something about the army I feel less comfortable, like, I understand it less. There's something there that I don't know. So if we

Speaker:

only felt that about God Is that interesting? Is that interesting? Yeah, well, where has like, Where does God come to play for you? Oh, wow. It's a whole,

Speaker 2:

it's a whole chapter right there.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Definitely like the first few weeks after October 7th was like, okay, I'm going to sit here and I'm going to like dove in like everything's normal. I couldn't do it. Yeah. A lot of questions, a lot of questions of, uh. You know, the people who we saw in Faraz that were good people, and the people who were taken out of Han unions are good people, and people who are most generous are all good people. And like, I grew up always hearing that good people get Nisim. Like they get saved. Like, they do good, good person does good thing and gets saved. Yeah. Over and over and over again. Nobody told you like, you know, good people do good things and then also have tragedies.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And on October 7th we saw miracles and we saw tragedies, like anti miracles almost. Like people in the wrong place at the wrong time. Good people.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And so, my, my, you know, my little like, is one of my missions that I talk about. Like one of my missions is develop a relationship with Hashem that is, That, that's there, that, that he's there with you on the shittiest times, excuse my language, on the worst times And on the best times, meaning there's gonna be a day where you have to feel all, you know You're gonna see a miracle and you're gonna want to thank Hashem for it. There's gonna be a day where you're gonna see Tragedy and the miracle is not gonna happen. You're gonna want Hashem with you there too on that day And so my little suggestion is like Develop that relationship. Communicate with Hashem. Talk to Hashem. You know, but I always say you don't have to be a brussel root to speak to Hashem. You know, you don't have to be in the forest to speak to Hashem. That's, that's a message I gave to kids across America, and I don't think any rabbi has ever told them like, you know, not in tefillah, not in candlelighting, not in any ritual, like you can talk to Hashem on a daily basis.

Speaker:

Yeah, like God's a resource for you. He's there. Exactly.

Speaker 2:

He's there if you If you make, if you make it happen.

Speaker:

Yeah, I relate to you. Like, I felt like the the tools and the paradigms I was taught about God, like, didn't feel relevant. It was like, I was not prepared. I didn't I was not prepared for this.

Speaker 2:

I call it like the structure of Amunah. Like, wasn't built strong enough.

Speaker:

Wasn't built strong enough. Wasn't built with something like this in mind.

Speaker 2:

No. It was only built to tell us, like, Good things happen when you do good.

Speaker:

Yeah. It was 10 minutes ago to tell us like, ah, strive, push, do more mitzvahs, like Isabel, you're our personal growth. I don't know.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. And we're all going to have those moments, right? Like you're going to deal with deaths in a family, God forbid, or sicknesses. And we all have to like, be ready for those days. And so my, our job now is to like, what I've been feeling is like, try and explain to people there's a way to prepare for that day.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I think that's, that's the general take that I take from all this is that we're all going to be called up again for whatever, for, you know, for emotional difficulties, or relationship difficulties, or family difficulties, or health difficulties, or immunodifficulties. It's like, Your time to start working on it so that you're ready for when that day happens is now. You know what I mean? It's like, be the best you can because you never know when you're going to need it. Yeah, wow. That's what I'm taking from this whole experience.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And that's my, those are my green stickers, you know. Those are like the

Speaker:

Yeah. Did he also make you do like um, First, we gave names to the chapters. We came up with names. Okay. Did you do that also? Yeah, a little bit. And then we decided where to put the red ones. Yeah, something like that. Yeah, I did the same thing. That was great. Everyone was putting greens on, like, when we were doing the most, like, work. The most fulfilling, like, team work towards the end. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Exactly, and the reds were at the slowest times.

Speaker:

Yeah. Yeah, the reds were hard. The reds in the beginning also. What's the best thing like someone who's visiting an army base can do? What's like been a good time, like where you felt good support?

Speaker 2:

Right after Shuli Rand. It was like Restaurant Concert like a private it was like restaurant. We're sitting in a restaurant eating the best food And shirley ron was just singing his like songs and a lot of his songs are Ayaka and like and we're not driven and it was just like It was but I think that was powerful. You know what I mean? I think that there's a time and a place for like the clubbing To be honest like we don't need that we're nine months into this war. We don't need a party every night And, you know, nobody's come and done a kumzitz for us, right? That would be like, I think that would be powerful. Shirley Ronda, that was like close to it. It was like a kumzitz. Yeah, special. Um, it's difficult because you have all different types of religious levels here, right, in the army. And so, you can't get super, like, Febregan, you know, hardcore. But Shirley Ronda is like, for example, a perfect mix where like, secular people get him and religious people don't. That was really cool. But, um, yeah, the army base, the army visits are sweet, they're nice. I tell everybody, go take care of the kids. We're a piece of steak at this point. We're a piece of steak at this point. Yeah,

Speaker:

yeah, yeah. You said you're getting out, uh, you're getting out tomorrow.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, like an after, going home.

Speaker:

What's your, what's your seventh right now? We're doing Shavua, Shavua. Something like that. Okay. It's going to change. It's so much unpredictability. It is. You're really, it seems like you're really letting yourself like letting yourself be mutated to the I have to. Yeah. I have

Speaker 2:

to. I have a big problem is that like my, my work, I can't just like show up the day before for a tour. I have to tell them two weeks in advance, a week in advance. This is happening where it's not, and if it's not happening, I gotta get another guy for it. It's really hard. So it's complicated, because Americans want to know, like, am I giving, are we getting a toy together or not? And I'm like, I can't tell you whether next Tuesday is actually going to happen. I can tell you, I've cancelled a lot of trips that the army ended up saying, oh, we don't need you. And I've lost out on a lot of money because of that. Yeah. So I've, I've just been, you know. You're not

Speaker:

Smaee, essentially. I'm not

Speaker 2:

Smaee, 100

Speaker:

percent. How's that been? That's, that's a challenge.

Speaker 2:

That's kind of what I'm talking about here, which is like, every time I cancel a trip. I lose out. I lose out. And I'm canceling the trip based on what my commander is telling me. And that changes every two seconds.

Speaker:

Wow. And, and yet you still keep coming and you're not

Speaker 2:

for sure people ask me about tours in June, 2025. And

Speaker:

you literally have to say, I don't know. Dude,

Speaker 2:

I don't know if what I'm doing tomorrow. You think I know what's going to be in June 2025? So that mindset, I think like for Americans, is really important. You have to learn to live with a certain level of flexibility. If you're coming to Israel, And everybody's asking me, is it safe? I don't want to put, I don't want to explosion sound feels totally normal, right? The streets is totally normal, feel safe. But you also have to be okay with like, things can change. Things are dynamic. Your tour guide might cancel on you. You're the, my call might be closed because the guy went off to me.

Speaker:

Totally. Yeah. That was a whole country of like people serving. It's insane, I love it. It's not cheesy lot, so

Speaker 2:

it's so deep. Like you have like, you know, storekeepers that are fighting on the front lines. We didn't grow up like that

Speaker:

a mush

Speaker 2:

with a celebrity who is a celebrity. You imagine if like Ashton Kutcher went and fought in Afghanistan and like lost a leg, you know what I mean? Like no. We had a celebrity go and. And fight on the front lines and get his face flicked off. It's

Speaker:

crazy. I'm talking about Idan Hamedi. Yeah. Yeah, you're so right. It's like a, it's a powerful thing. Do you think like, do you think that the country and the people are doing a good job of appreciating the middle of the game, these storefront owners? I get a lot of like, thank you for your service. I don't know how to respond to that. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

You know, I don't like, etzmecha. Okay. I don't like it. It's like, what do you want me to do with that? You think I'm going into Gaza and be like, you know what? I'm going to be shmoga al etzmecha because that guy on the bus told me to.

Speaker:

I

Speaker 2:

don't really get it. You want to say like, you should, you know, be matzluyach, we should be minetzach. I don't know. It doesn't do it for me. But I'll tell you that, um, for example, I went to Ofakim today. I went to the gym. It was free. Because I'm a soldier. We're nine months into this. That, that gym chain, I think it's a chain in Israel, has to be losing money on all these people coming and using their gym for free.

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

The like. Soldiers need to use the gym. I'm gonna go use the gym. I do still feel it. Still feel the love. I do still feel it. I absolutely do still feel it. You know? It's, it's gonna be not the same as it was day one, day two. It's waning, but

Speaker 5:

Yeah.

Speaker:

What's been meaningful for you even the past few weeks, past day, what keeps you going, what, what breaks you down.

Speaker 2:

What keeps me going is just knowing that I have a, that I have a word, that I have a voice. And that people are listening to that voice and it's really special for me. I've never had a stage in my life. Wow. It's such a, such a large stage in my life. And I don't know anything about Instagram. I don't know anything about social media. I have no idea what I'm doing, but people like it. So I'm just continuing to do it. And so just having people don't realize that the voices, the voices, the, um, videos that I'm doing are not just for them. Right. They're for me, like they're for me to really, um, to get, to get a lot of, uh, Meaning. From everything that I'm doing and to give that out. So everybody find their voice. Everybody find their tafkid. Everybody find, I always tell the story in Khan Yunus. We're on our way out and there's this guy making schnitzels.

Speaker 5:

Oh,

Speaker 2:

there was a schnitzel oning maker in the middle of Gaza. I was like, wait, at the malak? I don't remember where it was. The owners that were eating fresh, Deep fried schnitzels and french fries in the middle of Gaza right after a, right after a mission. It's like, this guy figured out what his, you know, mission is, what his tafket is. Like, if schnitzel guy can do it, if the barbers can do it, then everybody can do it. That's what I've been walking around with, uh. For the past two months, just telling everybody, find, find your mission, find

Speaker:

your destiny. It comes off, dude. You're killing it. You're, it really comes off in like, I'm not just saying it. Since day one, I was like, It's been crazy. When I saw you also on the 7th, and it lifted me up and you're killing it. So really, thank you for sitting with me and

Speaker 2:

let's do a chapter, chapter two, chapter three, good luck on everything. Good luck on the podcast. You're making me jealous. Maybe I should do a podcast. Let's get me.

So that was my conversation with Arkie. Thank you so much for joining us. I hope you. Came to some comfort, some understanding. And I hope you join us again. Soon as we talked to more highly. About their experiences. And. Their hopes, their fears, their feelings. Their struggles. Feel free to reach out. My info is in the description. The music was provided by a vetting Michelia. Aliyah for a wonderful band. Give them a listen on Spotify. Follow them on Instagram. And join us again soon.