The Gospel Twins Podcast
A podcast that brings the freedom and truth of God's Kingdom to the masses.
The Gospel Twins Podcast
Boundaries: The Art of Self-Preservation
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Do you struggle with saying "no" without feeling guilty? The Gospel Twins explore the essential art of boundary-setting from a biblical perspective, challenging the notion that personal limits are somehow selfish or unloving.
Sean and John share candid stories about their own boundary journeys, from family expectations to social obligations that drain rather than fulfill. They dive deep into scriptural examples of how Jesus himself maintained healthy boundaries—taking time alone to pray, prioritizing his mission over familial expectations, and even rebuffing Peter with "Get behind me, Satan" when necessary. These biblical illustrations provide powerful validation for Kingdom Citizens who feel conflicted about establishing personal limits.
The twins tackle common boundary violations we all face: the friend who adds unexpected stops during an outing, the family member who drops by unannounced, or the persistent pressure to attend every social gathering. Their practical advice offers listeners permission to value their own time and energy as God-given resources to be stewarded wisely, not squandered out of obligation or fear of judgment.
"People will take everything from you if you let them," they warn, not as a cynical perspective but as a call to wise discernment. The conversation shifts from boundaries to the healing power of whole foods, particularly watermelon and fruit-based diets, with testimonies of remarkable recoveries and a mouth-watering cucumber-pineapple salad recipe perfect for summer hydration.
Whether you're facing boundary challenges with demanding relatives, struggling to honor your own needs, or simply seeking a refreshing perspective on Kingdom living, this episode delivers wisdom with the twins' signature blend of humor, authenticity, and biblical insight. Your journey toward healthier relationships begins with understanding that boundaries aren't walls—they're the foundation of genuine connection and sustainable service to others.
Episode Introduction
Speaker 1This is the Gospel Twins, with your host, sean and John, your go-to podcast for the kingdom perspective on current events and the good news God has for the culture. Get ready to renew your mind, one piece at a time.
Speaker 2People of God. People of God, welcome to the Gospel Twins podcast, where you get your mind renewed piece by piece and episode by episode.
Speaker 3And I am sean and I am john and, and we are the gospel twins yes, that's who we are and I just want to iterate. That's not what we do, that's what we are we do. That's what we are what up, man, what's up, what up, man bro? As they say, all good things come to an end you talking about your vacation right time to go back to the grind, man.
Speaker 2Not only that, I to get my mind right, because I got to report to work at 4 o'clock in the morning, because I will be moaning in the morning, and that's not you getting up at 4.
Speaker 3You got to be there reporting at 4.
Speaker 2Bright-eyed bushy-tail.
Speaker 3Now, what does that mean?
Speaker 2your day has to start when uh it's because you know my usual time is five o'clock, but they want us, uh, their hour early because the machines were off for a week and usually okay, okay, so that's just that's yeah, to work out the bugs. Yeah, yeah, just got you coming back. Yeah, okay, yeah, nice week like nice vacation, pretty much a staycation, and um as I talked about, went to the zoo with the great oh, that was dope.
Speaker 3Yeah, that was dope um.
Speaker 2I know it's funny that he's just this new generation bro, what, what what, what you mean, what you mean, you know, I mean kids that, and it was hot, and so he complained about the heat as much. I mean, he just kept talking about the heat. But then, you know, it was like my grandson, he wanted his tablet. Like bro, you want your tablet, man.
Speaker 3You want your tablet, man Bruh bruh, Give me my tablet so I can look up these animals. You know, I want to look at them through the tap man. I can't.
Speaker 2He's so obsessed with the Ninja Turtles man.
Speaker 3Oh bro, we can look at the real turtles dog Look.
Speaker 2And that's all he was concerned about. So once he saw the turtle, turtle, he was ready to go. And then he was. He was stopping every manhole. Look at that Like Ninja Turtles. So like right, oh, everyone, he was looking down and looking.
Speaker 3He taught everyone he was looking down, Looking for the NTs bro.
Speaker 2Yeah, then he brought one with him. He had to have Leonardo with him.
Speaker 3Get out for real.
Speaker 2Yeah, I was like man, you might want to leave this, I don't want to take it. Of course it became an issue Right, he don't want to take it. So of course it became a issue right, because you even want to drop in it and you know, oh yeah, oh yeah bro this generation man is they, they're new. They're new breed man, they're new breed bro. Man, that's, that's in a mouthful bro but I was worn I mean, it wasn't like my daughter's wasn't warning me right I would just sit on, take him to the zoo, because absolutely absolutely take it to the splash pad.
Speaker 2Take him to turtle co right, right I'm like turtle cove was right down the street. You could do that anytime anytime, let's do it, let's go let's go let's go some adventure, man, let's do some stuff. Yeah, for sure, for sure uh, so uh, yeah, that was a good time. Yeah, uh. How about you, man? What's your week brother?
Speaker 3man, you know, dude, just you know, I I love to just say that everything is everything and it is because it is what it is.
Dealing With Life's Challenges
Speaker 3but uh, yeah, it's been a lot of challenges, man, things going on, dude, and yeah just, I have to be honest, man, I have to this week, bro, I was just trying to keep my head low, man. I was just trying to keep my head low. A lot of stuff was jumping off, going on, man, doing a lot of praying, a lot of interceding, and keeping my head low, bro. Yeah, you had those encounters, man, and then I had to focus on not taking stuff personal. You know, not thinking that.
Speaker 3You know, and I guess, to say this in a proper fashion, man, you know the, the, the enemy is going to be the enemy, bro. You know this. This system is designed to keep you stressed, keep you frustrated, keep you upset. But it's a system, and don't take a system personal, bro. You know what I mean. Like it, it's not a it's. It's not a, it's not a specific uh thing targeted at me, you know, for for a specific reason, I'm not saying the enemy don't pursue and come after people like that, but I'm just saying it's just that, as the scriptures say, bro, it ain't no temptation and no issue taking you and it's not common to people. So you ain't going through nothing, ain't nobody else had to go through.
Speaker 3So you know, don't take it personal, don't act like it's just, you know it's just you you know this is common and uh, and handle it the way that the, that the lord uh gives you. You know the, you know instruction to handle it so is that the?
Speaker 2so is that the genesis of your facebook post that I saw yesterday?
Speaker 3that. Oh yeah, don't take it personal, yeah yeah yeah, I put that out there, man, because, um, you know I had to, you know, not to internalize it. It was like it's like journaling, man. You know, like I'm dealing with this, you know it's so easy, man, you know social media is is just amazing for posting things and capturing all the good stuff.
Speaker 3Everything looks great, you know and uh, but sometimes, man, you know, you just got to put it out there, like, you know, yeah, this, this is something I'm dealing with and, um, and if I'm dealing with it, you know, and if I can tell a person how I'm dealing with it, you know, let me put it out there. You know, maybe somebody else is dealing with it. If one person can look at it and be like, man, I don't need to take this personal, this ain't, this ain't about me. Just, you know, my life is I'm always going through something. Dog, why me? Why me? You ain't the only one going through it. It know it's, but so don't take it personal.
Speaker 3And that, that standpoint of not taking it personal, is the basis of not letting a root of bitterness come up in you, because you get better. And then, when you get better, that root starts shooting out and then they start defiling other people and they start, you know, and the worst thing you do is just get a group of people hating on the same thing you hate. No, you know, because it amplifies the issue. You know, man, this is the oh dog. Yeah, I can't stand that. And this man, dude, if I was you, I wouldn't. You know, you don't need that, bro, man dude, if I was you, I wouldn't you know?
Speaker 2you don't need that, bro. That uh what you had talked about. Remind me. I was in the store yesterday, I was in meyer, and this older gentleman was in front of me and he had uh he's. He was stating that, uh, it wouldn't take so long. It won't take long for me to get my groceries up on the counter because he only has, he only has a small amount okay he.
Speaker 2He said that his income dictates how much he could buy. Yeah, he's like. Yeah, man, he's like. He said I've been retired man, I sound as a retired person, you know everything is going up except that's up for my income. And so he had man. Yeah, he had like like 40 worth of groceries. That's unheard of. I'll see you guys yeah, and he just retired. He said he retired in 2021. Oh, man he said he did 50 years oh my goodness. And so you already know I'm like I'm right now, I'm gonna years oh my goodness, and so you already know I'm like, I'm right now I'm gonna.
Speaker 2I'm right. Uh, I'm in the process of seeing the financial advisor trying to get myself ready, yeah for retirement and which he told me I should work another five years, yeah right, and I'm like, I'm still trying to wrap my head around that trying to reconcile that right yeah, so when this man, this man told me he was 50, but he said he said.
Speaker 2He said but the key is to find something you like. And I said, sir, that's what I'm trying to do now. I said I've done 31 years before and I would like to retire here and and I'm not one of this not work but I want to do something I want.
Speaker 1I want to have joy absolutely because, he said enjoy.
Speaker 2He said he, he fixed, he worked. Uh, he created teeth. He said. Oh, he said I sat at the desk and I created teeth for the dentist wow wow. So yeah, he was in the 70s, I y'all don't want to get 50 years to no man what kind of?
Working 50 Years and Retirement Realities
Speaker 3life is that 50 years to just making a donuts dog. No you know, I'm just using that Dunkin Donuts. Oh yeah, time to make the dough.
Speaker 2That's just doing the same thing over and over, bro man that's my, that's that's living in America man Work and pay bills.
Speaker 3We pay bills we're going to be able to and we talk.
Speaker 2But yeah, I just like yeah, 31 years you got a long way to go.
Speaker 3I say I know I'm telling you I'm not, I'm not. Please don't compare what you're telling me.
Speaker 2The way that I'm going to Talk about If I had a different mindset.
Speaker 1I wouldn't even be 31.
Speaker 3If I had, to change my mind about some of this stuff. So no, sir.
Speaker 2Man bro. And a lot of people are doing, many leaving. I know a lot of people are leaving the country and living off right now.
Speaker 1My financial advisors say if I decided to live off 5000 a month I could do that till I'm 80 right now, if I want to do that, yeah, but if I want to do, like travel and all that he said.
Speaker 2He said he might want to get it to 6 000 a month and so so that's why. That's why he suggests that I work longer, another five years. Yeah, there are people living abroad that's living off a thousand. Sure, absolutely, and um, absolutely, and I'm seeing all types of uh, ethnic groups doing it white black Puerto.
Speaker 2Rican. This everybody, just you know. And um, they say you know, like moving abroad is not. You're not looking for utopia, because every country has its own problems. When they decided to make this choice, they consider safety, expenses and employment and they say they check all those boxes and then, of course, you got to do your research before you decide to make a move like that. Because you decide to make a move like that? Because you gotta know the laws, because a lot of laws is a lot different and um, but watch so many videos.
Speaker 2Just say I say, say I watch 50 videos for people moving abroad. Okay, I've probably seen two that said they would come back, everybody else like they're not even considered coming back wow they're just coming back to see family and I'm ready to go back. They get these work visas or even retirement visas for a year and just keep renewing it. Then a lot of these countries after either between three to five years, you can apply for citizenship.
Speaker 3Citizenship, wow, wow. I would assume their uh process of doing that probably is not as as as oh, no, no, no, yeah, man, and it's kind of like know, it's like we were even before we came on the air man, when we was talking. You know, america, man, our country is a country that's established as a bunch of immigrants, bro, the Statue of Liberty of freedom in our you know the harbor in New York, one of the most famous and large cities in our nation, with the plaque saying you know, give me a hunger, you're tired, you're poor. Basically, america being a place of opportunity, and all of this stuff for everyone, any and every. And yet that's what we have and this is what we say, and this is what our laws, our premise of and, as we say in our justice, we have.
Speaker 3As a lady that's blind, you know, like we don't, our system is supposed to be established upon, our criminal system is you're innocent until proven guilty, and these are all our foundational declarations and principles of our nation, and yet we function totally opposite of what we say. So there's literally a spirit of hypocrisy that illuminates from America and then we wonder why people are not when you go around and when you start asking people like why, about your nation and what people think about it? People didn't just hate America. They don't just hate America. Be like America because they're jealous of us and they'll be like man, y'all so spoiled.
Speaker 3And y'all don't, and you're so hypocritical. And it's not that hypocrisy doesn't exist everywhere, but when it's pervading from your government, that's a problem, bro. That is a problem Because that is the spirit that's going to permeate throughout your nation, and that's just not cool, bro, and uh yeah, remember, man, the civil war wasn't that long ago and that spirit of the confederacy still looms in this country. And um, and there has to be a renunciation of it. Man.
Speaker 1Yes.
Speaker 3That's the thing, bro. It's not that we're you cannot over. You can't build on top of sand. You can't. Your foundation got to be right, man, tear down everything, and this is a principle you know, a wisdom that jesus man gave you. Know who is the wisest and greatest person to ever. You know, walk this planet and let you know you. You cannot build.
America's Spirit of Hypocrisy
Speaker 3I don't care how good the house look, it can't be built on the same. Why? Because when the rains and the winds and stuff come, it's going to knock it over, and wind and rain is is is political issues, it's economical issues, you know it's, it's ethnic and social issues, and when those things start coming, man, we start seeing how shaky our country is. Man, you turn our lights off for three or four days, we going animalistic on you. Oh yeah, and we're supposed to be one of the most civil people on the planet. We are going around advocating our government as being one of the greatest forms of government there is, and if you take our basic comforts from us for a week, we're going to show our true colors, man, on you know, and it's it's, bro. This is ridiculous. This is ridiculous.
Speaker 2this is ridiculous that brings me to what I wanted to talk about boundaries bro okay. I was. I had a conversation with my wife and we've been talking about boundaries a lot lately.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 2She's not good at it as I am.
Speaker 3Setting them, you mean.
Speaker 2Yeah, setting them.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 2And so I was accused of running. Running man oh okay. Yeah, I was running and what I rebutted to my wife is like no, I see, and I said I don't like drama, you know. So if I know, if it's gonna be drama in a certain situation, no, I'm not gonna go there.
Speaker 1Like why would?
Speaker 2I go there, are you just running, you know? And um, when it comes to family, you know, because we were talking about family members as well- and when it comes to family, she throws know, because we were talking about family members as well and when it comes to family, she throws 70 times 70. I was like that's forgiveness, I'm not saying at least. Holding boundaries is so totally different from forgiving someone.
Speaker 3And that's a person asking for forgiveness.
Speaker 2Asking.
Speaker 3Asking, not giving them forgiveness, and they're not even asking for it. Yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2So I said uh, I said think about it. I said, jesus had boundaries too, he had mad boundaries plenty you know, oh, you know, he. He went away and prayed by himself a lot and meditated without absolutely you know, without the disciples, uh he even had his favorite.
Speaker 3He even had his favorite james john absolutely john james and peter you know, I literally was talking about this with with the fam yesterday.
Speaker 2Exactly what you're saying go ahead yeah, and then also in the situation where he was well, I think, was winning, in the room with the disciples and somebody said well, you're jesus, your mom and brother's at the door, he's like who is? Who is my mom?
Speaker 3who is that? Who are you talking about? It's like my mom and brothers in his room, right, he said he looked out of his disciples and said this is my, these are my peeps, yeah right here and another and another example is when you, Jesus, told the disciples that he had to go get killed.
Speaker 2He was going to get killed and Peter rebuked him like no, not you. He was like man, get behind me, Satan.
Speaker 3He put the screws to Peter real quick.
Speaker 2Get behind me, Satan.
Speaker 1You know you've been a stumbling block.
Speaker 3To what purpose that God has for me. Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2And family is so close. And then you give those you get family so much grace because you share blood, because they're family right. Yeah, but hey man, just like that movie Life Force man. You allow them to, they will suck the life force out of you Do you Of course you don't say Do, and we'll go on out of you To your corpse.
Speaker 3You know what I'm saying and we'll go on. And when they suck the life out of you, that's one thing my dad always taught me. He was like son, let me tell you People gonna figure it out man he was like and trust me, you give all that you got to them. They will take it all from you and when you ain't got nothing left, they will move on and find something else.
Setting Boundaries with Family
Speaker 3Thank you and I saw it. This was his wisdom, bro, and he did not live fully according to it when it came to family. And that is exactly what happened, bro. Suck the life man and that's everything. Your finances, the grace. You have taken advantage of the fact that you know of the type of person you are and will just take, take, take, take, and when you ain't got nothing left to give, bro, they move on and they will find another way yes, it's nothing wrong.
Speaker 2You know, you gotta, you gotta show mercy. I am sure and I'm also show discernment wisdom, come bro bro, which is anyway, do you?
Speaker 3you are hitting, you know you hitting it on the head. And because you, I'm gonna shut up and let you keep going. Go ahead. Oh no, dude, you are hitting it on the head. And because you are, I'm going to shut up and let you keep going. Go ahead bro.
Speaker 2Oh no, but that's what I was saying. This was just common sense and I was giving examples. She said that's where it comes from the examples. Yeah, I've seen both of my grandparents, maternal and paternal, allow people just to use them, especially my maternal mom. She got used until she passed away and then, like you said, those people moved on and found somebody going bro yeah and um.
Speaker 2And if it wasn't for my like my paternal grandma, if it wasn't for my grandfather just in the scene and being a pit bull and chasing people off, yeah, same thing would happen with her, absolutely, because I've heard him. I've heard him check people's like you're not going to do my wife like that. Yeah, you got to leave you're not going to keep coming over and asking her and doing this and that and um yeah, absolutely, absolutely seeing my mom too, bro, what a sister it to bro but a sister.
Speaker 1It because every even man.
Speaker 3Dude, I got feelings about the feelings that, yeah, the stuff you're saying, because I seen it like I said, I saw it up close. Man, my dad, man was one of the dopest people to me ever and and you talking about somebody who walked the walk, but he did not, I mean man would would. One of his big things that he would say is, if you can bring him, if you can bring him the truth on the matter and you had to scripturally come with it with my back and show him like a principle or something, because he was definitely a principle based person. And, bro, if you could come at him and show him like a principle or something, Because he was definitely a principle-based person, and, bro, if you could come at him and show him something, he'd say this is one of his big things. I stand corrected, I stand corrected, man, it was so much, bro, is I wanted man. In the last before he passed, I said, dad, we me and you need to go on on social media, start a father and son podcast and call it I stand corrected, because people need to be able to see that that crap can't teach old dogs new tricks and all that stuff.
Speaker 3Dude, that's a lot. That's a fallacy and the reason why people die early in life and like cause 80, 90, a hundred years, bro, those that's a lot. That we've been sold Like these are that's who you've lived a long time. A hundred years ain't jack bone, man. You know in light of. Okay, bro, I'm still learning stuff about my wife that I didn't know, and we've been together for 32 years, not married, but together. Man, I'm still learning stuff about my wife that I didn't know, and we've been together for 32 years, not married, but together. Man no 35. We just figured out yesterday 35 years together, bro, and I'm still learning stuff about it. And I'm and I'm 54.
Speaker 3So, dude, if I'm supposed to be learning all this stuff about and have and be with this woman forever and I'm supposed to, and I'm just learning stuff, you know new stuff about her and even her with me, bro, what's what's 30? What's I got? If I was to go off people's idea, I only got 30 more, 30 to 40 more years left before either I'm grown or my quality of life is shot. Basically, dude, I'm. This is just beginning. You know these are supposed to be only in a fallen world. Can you think of the wiser you get, the less life you get and, in the scripture promise, the more wisdom you honor in life and riches, and wealth is with wisdom. So the more wisdom you get. I'm supposed to be getting better and better and greater and greater. I'm learning from you and stuff and better food choices, and greater and great I'm learning from you and stuff and get better food choices and things like that man my life should be getting better, not worse.
Speaker 3So that whole narrative and mindset got a shift. And and that can't, if you are not willing to set boundaries, because if I don't I still got to go off everybody else's narrative. Not willing to set boundaries, because if I don't I still got to go off everybody else's narrative, because that's ingrained in our society man, your family blood is sticking in water, says who. Says who right, just because you born to my blood. But we don't think alike. We don't, you know, we don't believe the same way. We don't know this, and I'm glad you went to that, that, to that story, when Jesus, your mom, your dad I mean not your dad, your mom, your brothers and sisters outside man, okay, and when you know are you, so I should just stop doing what God is going.
Speaker 3I'm'm doing it. Actually, this is my real family here. They should be coming in, not me stopping to go out. Right, you know, connect with who I am and how I am. Don't rely on my blood relationship with you to determine the level of interaction and engagement we're going to have in your importance in my life. Bro, I ain't got nothing to do with who you know with the blood and who you are.
Speaker 2Can't imagine who are blood brothers Exactly, and I also told her. I said, look, I say, yeah, I got a lot of blood relatives. I say, but my family are my boys. You know you E D Lon line that that's like that's family to me, Right, right, you know people are tapping every day to learn from and grow with Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 3People are trying to do life with me man.
Speaker 2You know, you know, because, if they do this is such a good time? Yeah, because, because you know, because if they do this is such a good time. Yeah, because because you know I'm preaching to my wife on this. I hope she listen to this because I myself do.
Speaker 3Yeah, yeah, yeah Because I, because I reckon I got to set the boundaries, bro, Because I know like we went to the movies.
Speaker 2man, she have. She texted in the movies I like me. I said no, I said, man, put your phone down. We went to the movies, man, she have. She texted in the movies. I'm like man. I said no. I said man, put your phone down, tell them you're in the movies and you'll get them. Get at them in about two hours.
Speaker 3I mean the movie person even tell you to put your phone away.
Speaker 2Bro on the screen man bro, I was enjoying. I was so annoyed man, this can wait.
Speaker 3It absolutely can. It absolutely can.
Speaker 2Man. I took my phone, I placed it face down and I didn't look at it until it was time to go.
Speaker 3That's it. That's it. I can't even take a couple hours for myself. I'm telling you, bro, this is such an uh uh, uh, uh, uh uh on time topic, because people will take it all from you if you let them, if you don't set the bottom. And people will take everything from you, bro, that you allow them to take, man, if you don't set the boundary. This is why the lord says let your yes be yes yes, and guess what, let your no be.
Speaker 3No, yep, I don't owe you anything you know you ever notice when we tell people man, you know, uh, man, I, uh, I've got something going on. Man, you gonna be able to fall through. Uh, nah, bruh, you know I gotta you. Why can't you just say, nah, I'm not, I'm not gonna be able to go through it, let me fall through. For that People are waiting for your excuse. You know. No, if you just say no, people see that as being rude, like okay, you can't. You're just expecting for somebody to explain to you why they're not gonna do it. Man, you gonna be able to fall through it. No, I ain't gonna be able to do that, bro. Now it just go quiet. If you stay quiet and don't start, ushering in your excuses on why you can't come.
Speaker 3You know folk gonna get upside stuff to go and they talking about no, you know, and didn't even tell me why you know, like bro, are you a? Why you know I'm not interested in it. What if I just told you like no, bro, I'm not coming there because I'm not interested in it. I'm not interested in coming around and being with a bunch of people that you know, that I don't know, I don't. You know I don't do that. That's not a good time to me, man.
Speaker 2And then like, yeah, because I've learned a lot of this stuff. I learned from my grandfather. He just had palm trees All this stuff I learned from my grandfather. He just said. He just said about trees because of my lifestyle, my diet, lifestyle.
Speaker 3Yeah, yeah. It excludes me from a lot of a lot of stuff and you being able to have a good time at a good time because now I got to plan ahead.
Speaker 2You know what you eat, so I got to eat before Right and then take my water and drink my water. You know what you go eat, so I gotta eat before right and then take my water and drink my water, you know right and then, and then if people do know like well, oh, no, no, no, no, don't, don't eat that.
Speaker 3That's, you know, that's reserved for for sean. When he comes like why, because that's vegan this? Oh, oh, okay, so all right. And then when you get to the set, you gotta be in dialogue with everybody about your vegan lifestyle. And then everybody was like man, why you need to get you some ribs and get some of this.
Speaker 1I gotta sit here and listen to all this.
Speaker 3Be like man see bruh, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2And so I, especially my wife, get me one thing about it she hadn't learned yet. If you give me out, I am taking it. I'm walking through that mud with two feet, two toes down, baby Right. You know what I'm saying so cause I and she liked the four or five I, you know, I, I set this one out, man, I wasn't going to do it. I just didn't, I didn't you know right. Uh and I I didn't do a lot of explanation about it but I told my wife I was like, as she said, such and such a vitalist that's like.
Speaker 2well, you know how I feel. It's like why are you even?
Speaker 3putting me in this? Why push me to that when you don't even know my stand on it? Right, exactly.
Speaker 2And then, after the fact, she just kept on talking about it and I was like why you keep bringing it up? I was like I was like it's over and done with no, I didn't. I didn't show up. You know why I didn't show up, right? Well, it wasn't about this and that. Well for me. I didn't want to. I didn't want to look like I was participating in anything absolutely I was like I'm at the crib you know, you and I went to the movies, had a good time and right you know you decided to go and you know, be around the grill and all that.
Speaker 2I just wasn't feeling that and so I stayed at home.
Speaker 3But yeah, just uh respect my, you know respect my boundaries, yeah, but, and here's the thing, I do want to give the caveat and the flip to it. Because, man, because my boundaries can be so restrictive that sometimes my wife will, you know, she will tell mike, bro, come on, man, just and open up a little bit. You know what I mean. You know, be be a little more. Uh, because people, they automatically think you're anti-social when you don't do it. And I said it's not that I'm antisocial, it's just what we're gathering about is not of my interest. You give me a group of people that is getting down with the stuff that I get down with. Bro, I'm there and you had to pull me from the place. We're like come on, man, let's go bro.
Speaker 2But then that's considered selfish you just think about your, your interests and stuff like I was throwing everybody, yeah right aren't you? Aren't you going to this because it's your interest, because you're interested in it?
Speaker 3absolutely. I'm not interested in it.
Speaker 2I'm cool man right.
Speaker 3And then when you go there and you guys sit there, had his fake smile and all this stuff, jokes are going on that you ain't don't think funny and this is not people doing stuff that you just ain't down with it. But but not to bring nobody else as being a Debbie downer and all of this stuff. You got to try and do this. Or law, you know how he is, did you brought me here to clown me out. I came, you know, and here's the thing Most people already know the type of dude I am, you know, and you know, man, I remember going to a city, you know, going to a family gathering and you know, man, you know how to.
Respecting Different Personalities
Speaker 3You know how to. You know how they do it, you know they. You know they get the spark and the spiff, bro, you know, and passing it around, and it was one of the dudes, man that you know, my brother-in-law was there, it was actually had his place and they all in the backyard, man, you know now that it's legal, bro, everybody just out doing it and it's all good and it got to me, you know, and the dude, you know one of the dudes who there, he don't know me, he's just there. But they just out there, you know, do as people, snoop, dog, there's the tot at barn, you know. So the dude come over and offered, and then my brother-in-law was like, oh no, don, no, don't, nope, nope, nope. Now he got a new dude.
Speaker 3Look like what, like what? What did I do? Like you? Like no, I mean, he don't even even roll, like that. And the dude was like, oh, ok, that's not. But then once that spotlight is on you, yeah, now you feeling like the red is that, you know because everybody else is doing this and you ain't, and you know. So now you killing the whole vibe, you know because. And then when somebody say something or do something, oh, I'm sorry about that, preacher, I'm sorry about that. Okay, bro, it's time for me to go, you know, because it's really now this, this wasn't my same, I said, but people think that they don't, if you don't show up, that you somehow judging them or you don't got love for and be like I got mad love for you.
Speaker 3You just had that same respect and love for me. You know, that's just not my, my deal, you know, and if you want to do it, do it and have fun with it.
Speaker 2Also, for me it's personal as well, because I was, you know, somebody described me, described me as the party Like well I used to throw parties.
Speaker 3Absolutely.
Speaker 2They were talking to my girl, heather, I work with. She's like Mm, hmm. Sean didn't throw party, he was the party.
Speaker 3He was the party Right and I just want to shake that.
Speaker 2I'm not comfortable in that setting anymore. Not saying that I won't do it. I like music, so if it's some light music, and stuff man, I'm chilling. Definitely. As a matter of fact, I bring the music.
Speaker 3Right, right.
Speaker 2But if it's too much debauchery, I'm just not right.
Speaker 3Oh this is done. It, man, you've been there, done that man.
Speaker 2I've seen it all Right, I've seen so much and I'm cool right now At 54, 55, I'm I'm chilling man and I am a different place and I'm a different stage. Yeah, I want to call myself anti-social, but I am introverted. I am yeah, for sure, for sure, and yeah, you know, just like everybody. So I just know how I vibe in that type of environment and I'm sitting there and I'm just, I'm kind of I'm faking it, but I'm not, I'm not enjoying myself to the right.
Speaker 3I'm absolutely going to find somewhere and kind of chill out to myself and let people do do them, and I'm over here doing me, you know? I mean because I don't. Actually I don't have to have all that, I don't have to have all that stuff going on, because I'm dude, I, I don't know, I don't know how to say to me, I'm to me. I'm just one of the coolest people ever, bro so so I can be alone with me and I'm good.
Speaker 3you know what I mean. I don't I don't need a lot of external stuff, but I'm also not a person that's trying to down everybody else's stuff. Look, if that's what's good for you, that's cool and, man, we can have a conversation and we can do all of this. But when it comes down to it, man, you know, we just, on a lot of things, don't share the same interests. Yeah, and it's okay. Why is that not okay, man, with people?
Speaker 2I was, and I was the person that had to be around somebody. You know, it was a time where I didn't go to the movies by myself.
Speaker 1I would go out to eat by myself.
Speaker 2I always had to have a date or somebody with me and now that I'm like, I'm so comfortable who I am and I'm so comfortable in my own skin that I don't need company to enjoy like that, to enjoy it right now I don't want to just leave you here by yourself, and I'm like you don't even get it.
Speaker 3This is like dope to me, because like dope to me.
Speaker 2I will walk you to the car and open the door, kiss you goodbye.
Speaker 3Wish you have all the fun in the world. Just be safe, update me every now and then, let me know how you're doing and if you need me, call me and, as the Spinner say, I'll be there, I'll be around. But, bruh, as far as me needing to go and you feeling a way about leaving me, look, you just don't get it. This is all that to me, man. This is all that, bro. And here's the thing, man. Because this is keeping Jesus, yeah, man, go ahead. What did you say, man? Because this is keep it. Yeah, man, go ahead. What you?
Speaker 2say no. This is funny because I just I had a relationship that dissolved because I was the way I am, you know, because that partner that that girlfriend always said yes to every invite.
Speaker 1And.
Speaker 2I said look, and I gave an example. I said look, I say you might get invited to 10 things. I say look, and I gave an example. I said look, I said you might get invited to 10 things. I said I might go to four with you. She was like oh, my God. No.
Speaker 3Legit.
Speaker 2We're a couple. We're a couple, I know, but that's your stuff, man.
Speaker 3Absolutely, absolutely, bro. And guess what? I'm cool with it. Why can't you be? You know what I mean. You go, because I'm like saying go, well, okay. So if you worried about what people think about you coming along, then don't go. Yeah, you know, but I want to go, then go. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3So, this is what I'm saying, man. It's like we have to drag other people. This is what me and my wife say all the time. Man, god is so amazing and so big, bro. He's so amazing and so big and so true to it that everybody can get what they need. Nobody don't have to suffer insufficiency when it comes to God. His grace is sufficient for everyone. So, but only if we'll accept people for who they are and not try to make them fit into our mold or our concept of what things can be or should be.
Speaker 3People don't realize, man, I have developed my personal relationship with the Lord and with the invisible realities, bro, that I'm chilling and cool, and these are just as much my peeps as other people are. I'll be sitting there and be like Lord. Can you believe that? You know what I mean? And, bro and I have that internal conversation with the Holy Spirit. And this is not we have it. Just because I don't see him with my eyes Don't mean I'm enjoying this company any less than you know I'm like. Well, and here's the thing. Holy Spirit stayed at the cut with me, and Holy Spirit went to the event with my wife, mm. Hmm, this is the beauty in all of this.
Speaker 3And I said and, like you said and it ain't like I won't go to any, it's just not a 10. I'm probably only gonna hit about four, maybe five, but this is gonna be a 50, 50, and I'm letting you know that yeah right, I ain't going to every one of them. I can tell you that out the gate. Yes, I'm not going to everyone. Yeah.
Speaker 2And then, and then like, and then go to these events and then I have a good time and like you know you don't have to say yes to everyone.
Speaker 3Well, you know, and guess what, you can do it too, when it is like, OK, this ain't the, I'm not feeling the vibe, well, we're going to go ahead and cut it short, you short. Yeah, how many times people like man, we gonna stay, at least look here, why you? Gotta have that. Why you gotta put that stipulation on it? Because you worried about what other people say.
Speaker 2Look here man, my look, man and I. This might sound come off as selfish, but it's the truth. I had this conversation with my mom. She's like you know, my mom. She's like she called me. She needed me to take her a few places so you know I'm a planner.
Speaker 2I planned to the team bro, so I picked her up and I went to the spots that we were. We had planned to go. And then my mom what she usually does, like oh what? Says we all, can we go do this? And this night, and I was like wait, I said you didn't say that when I was on the phone right, you coming out of a different bag and this is something she usually does, and so I always, oh I always bite back on it.
Speaker 3Man like right, why are?
Speaker 2you doing it. Then she said this is how I am. Well, you know how I am. I'm a planner. But I said, mom, I would have left home earlier, if I know you right, I would have adjusted this and things you know, because, uh, I have to be at the house between five and six, so I give my dog her medicine, you know sure epileptic so she has to have that medicine.
Speaker 2So I told her I was like, look, now you, now you're coming into my time where I need to be home, get my dog and medicine. I said had you said you need to go to these other spots?
Speaker 3And I said I would have made different.
Speaker 2People I saw came earlier and I say you know, I think every example I said that's just like you say, so I need, I need $100. And then I come home. By the way, I need about three.
Speaker 1Right.
Speaker 2That's not comparable. I say yes, it is because my time is money Right, right, it matters right. I know, absolutely yes.
Speaker 1That's just how I am. I thought this is how I am.
Speaker 2You know I'm a planner Like can we? I'm like I'm just asking for a compromise Right? I'm?
Speaker 3not going to tell you? No, absolutely. That's so funny when you said that, because I remember I used to do that with my dad Because I had to learn my father. Do we realize that we have to learn people? People got to learn you, we got to learn them and we deal with each other according to knowledge, what we learn about each other. So I used to tell my dad all the time like dad, can I get ten dollars and he'll pull out a lot of money, go past 20s and all this other stuff and to get to the 10 and hand me the 10 I'm like bruh, I'm like dad, can I?
Speaker 3this is how you gonna give me $10?. He's like that's what you asked for With that, because I see he got much more than that. I feel like he should automatically just give me more than that.
Speaker 1I'm like why should you?
Speaker 3Why should you? You know, you asked for $10 and that's what I gave you. I'm like well, dad, can I get 20?
Speaker 3He's like no, no, not this time you know, and then he pulled his money back up and he put in his pocket. But here's the thing, bro, and I had to learn that people come just because, like you said, I come, pick you up and we going out, what can we run here? You have not even stopped to consider, have not even stopped to consider that I've, I've adjusted my schedule to what you said. Right, just because we out together don't mean all of a sudden, let's do this. Wifey was good for that with me.
Speaker 3Man, I want you to come and go to the store with me and I'm thinking, okay, what's, though, we going to? We going, and I know, based on what she say, how long we gonna be at that store. So she's like we just gonna, we gonna do this, and then we get out there. You do this because this got done a little bit faster. Well, let's run by here and do this. Wait a minute. You said let's go to the store because I already know what's happening here, even though we got here done a little faster. Let's go to this store Cause I already know what's happening here, even though we got here done a little faster. When we go to this other spot, it's going to take us.
Speaker 3We're going to now breach the timeline of what I allotted and thought we would be there when you thought we would be here for this long, but now you're going to add a spot on and we're going to be much longer. So you know it. It's like we can't get change back.
Healing Power of Fruit and Watermelon
Speaker 3You know, you gotta owe me something you know what I mean, right right I mean, you know like we like that it's great that we didn't take as long. Now I could get back to doing. I was doing, or you know what, or people want to ask, well, what you got to do. Even if it's nothing, it's still something, because it's what I want to do.
Speaker 2Thank you and my, my, nothing is intentional bro my nothing is something to me.
Speaker 3You know what I mean there's nothing to you, almost a vacation this past week.
Speaker 2Wife at work and she hit me up like what you doing.
Speaker 3I'm chilling right, so you ain't doing nothing this is why don't you go do this, bro. You gotta get to the point when you ever have. You know you got so much that you gotta tell people please don't tell them I'm off today. Oh, because you know people will, will plan your day for you, thank you my wife just did that.
Speaker 2She had a brief man, she had three-day bereavement man and she told no one that she was at the crib dude, sometimes that's how it's got to be, bro.
Speaker 3Yeah man, look it's got to be that way what's your?
Speaker 2she said what's your plans? All right, I tell you my plans. You know, uh, where I kill my dog man he wakes you up. He wakes you up about five o'clock, so feed the dogs around between 5 36 and then I might uh do some laundry, and then I say laundry, laundry, laundry is at eight and then nine is chilling, 10 is chilling, lemon is chilling.
Speaker 3Absolutely. It's substantial. It matters though.
Speaker 2Do days in the wrong, like what you doing, because I did have some days set aside because I was off. I had some doctor's appointments and appointments I need to. Yeah, they're mad and for fail, but Besides that it was all.
Speaker 3There's a reason why they used to say chilling like a villain, because people think it's criminal for you. Just, I mean you ain't doing nothing, especially when they know they got to be working or whatever you could have at least. At least did what I was.
Speaker 2Oh, and you had to heat a company with that. Oh man, oh yeah.
Speaker 3Oh man, oh man.
Speaker 2See, I was.
Speaker 3Oh, here's the thing I might do, and your event is outside. No, no, no.
Speaker 2Well, we got to know I'm straight man, I'm not yeah, I've been wanting to say that, talk, talk about boundaries, man.
Speaker 3Gotta settle man and everybody's a different bro.
Speaker 3And this is why it's called respect the boundaries. We all have to respect one another's boundaries, and it doesn't mean that they're not still walls or doors. It's not like it can't be altered or you don't have access, but I determined that. I determined when to relax my boundaries or if I'm going to or willing to expand them. That's up to me, you know. Thank you, if you know, like, why don't you try and do this and be like you know what I probably should, but not today. I'm not gonna do it today, and then you be all right with that. You know what I'm saying. You'll be all right with that.
Speaker 3And and vice versa, man is my bro. Boundaries are huge, and I mean man. The scriptures are even clear. It says you know, guard your heart with all diligence, because out of it flows the issues of life, and that word issues mean the boundaries, the borders, if you don't from your heart. That's what precedes the boundaries, bro, and this is why people are so brokenhearted and so, uh, hurt so many times because they didn't set them, or if they, or if they did set them, they were not diligent to keep them she also threw at me.
Speaker 2Hey, because I'm man, you know you, you know me all my life and my house on on beach was the spot. It was the spot. It was always people there and that house was made. What nine 800, 850, 900 square foot house? Yeah, right and we had, uh, my aunt I don't even remember my aunt, mario's mom and and my cousin stayed with us. Man, it was, man we was, it was eight, deep in the house, man.
Speaker 1Yeah, right, right.
Speaker 2I was eight deep in that house at one time, and so living with a lot of people, man, it's just not my. I just don't find it peaceful. And then now I'm at the point where my house is my peace. And my wife was like you don't like company, like I mean, especially if it's's, if it's unannounced man, right, right, like, give me, give me an opportunity to prepare I need to prepare and it's not even just making sure your house is yeah, right, is, is is prepared.
Speaker 3I have to prepare, yeah my man mentally yes prepare for it especially, and it really depends on who the people are.
Speaker 2Yeah, oh, I'm not prepared for this. I'm at your party. So, yeah, I'm calculated and absolutely. And I want to find a sign maker, because one thing I want to put on my door leave your drama and your cuss words in the car and and why you do that when you take off your shoes, and that's what.
Speaker 3I'm talking about Bruh. What's wrong with that?
Speaker 2Those are the rules of this house all the time. Then the rules it's like no smoking.
Speaker 3Don't bring that into my atmosphere.
Speaker 2I got, I combat that.
Speaker 3Uh, you know uh that's just part of my vocab. I'm just keeping it real and that's just who I am, okay, well then, alter your personality, yes, to come into my house, like, come on, you asking me to do it, to come into yours, because I don't cuss, I don't do all this other stuff, but if I come to something you throwing, that's all that's going to be happening. So you're asking me to alter my personality to come to your stuff, but you ain't willing to alter yours to come into myself man, my rules have not changed since we've been inside excuse me a lot more 11 years rules have never changed.
Speaker 2Why? You shoot why you got your shoes on the carpet like what's up with that?
Speaker 3and uh, are you still on that? You're still on that. That's who. That's the rules. That's what makes them rules.
Speaker 1They don't change bro, no, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Right now yeah yeah.
Speaker 3Right.
Speaker 2Let's get to the health tip. Let's go to the health. Oh man, that group. I sent you to that watermelon class group man that group has blessed me tremendously.
Speaker 1Mm, hmm.
Speaker 2The man that tremendously man, the man that the things, the stories that I read, and, um, man, the stories I read, man, so, many.
Speaker 1It's so much healing in fruit.
Speaker 2Yeah, and I see a lot of people coming, all these testimonies, brother, uh, people having these illnesses, and doctors say you got this much time to live and so a lot of these people fasting, just fasting on watermelon juice man. Watermelon juice man and watermelon is very magical and I've seen people heal themselves just by drinking watermelon juice or he's just eating watermelon for a long at the time. So these people in this group go anywhere from three days to to two months. Bro and um go to the doctor and the doctor's like what happened? Like I just I wouldn't, I just went wrong. You know, you can look at his two examples for celebrities that that could testify to that. You look at Lenny Kravitz man. He, just he's incredible. He looks like I was. Yeah, yeah, he's a lot of raw.
Speaker 2And the other one is Woody Harrelson. If you look at like man what what he what he been up man what what he been on tv since the 80s.
Speaker 3Man like yeah, right, right, right. I mean he looks old man, yeah what do you do that?
Speaker 2you look like that and had an energy. He's he raw, he's much raw as he had he can yeah, and what?
Speaker 3and your boy, terrence tritt howard, I heard him say that when he got remarried, man, you know, his woman affected his, you know. Start telling him the stuff he need to stop eating and put him on to the, to the rod and the fruits and some other things, man and this dude look great man. And he still smoke and he still smoke yeah he still smokes man. But just the other stuff or the other lifestyle changes, just yeah, like I said, man, I do got a question for you.
Speaker 3Because what? Because it's called watermelon. So and I heard, I hear a lot of people say that you should eat your water more so than drink it, because drinking your water flushes out and away a lot of the nutrients, whereas if you're eating your water, you're getting the full impact of the hydration.
Speaker 2Yeah, because it goes to your stomach and it breaks it down. It goes to your bloodstream. Absolutely, absolutely, brother. So, matt, that brings me to one of the things that I've eaten. I've come across this recipe for you. Ever heard of cucumber pineapple salad? Not only is it good for you, it's good for bloating and constipation, but it's very refreshing, bro. I had two bowls of this yesterday. You get your one ripe pineapple and dice it up. You get two large cucumbers. I like those smaller cucumbers because they got a strong taste to them. They're more flavorful. But then you get a fourth of a red onion. Chop it up, get cilantro. You can either use cilantro or parsley, whatever you like. Some people don't like cilantro. I tend to like parsley, more so.
Speaker 2I chop that up, get about a fourth cup of that, and then you get a. Get you one jalapeno. You know, you know, take the seeds out and chop that up and you get your lime lime, maybe one, two limes, and squirt it over there. But also, what I also do is add olive oil to it and I add tomatoes to it and I use vinegar white lime vinegar.
Speaker 3I was just about to say, man, what about the vinegar boy?
Speaker 2Man, I'm going to tell you. So I've been eating it, I've eaten it like that. So then something told me like man, maybe add some, um, like some type of pasta or rice to it. So you know, I stopped eating rice, but I found this yeah yeah, chickpea rice. So you know, when you look on the back of the box, it just says chickpea flour. That's the only one that you're in there, brother one ingredient brother, just one ingredient.
Speaker 3What it is, yeah man, I added that to that salad, my gosh.
Show Closing and Farewell
Speaker 2So refreshing so I'm gonna have that. That makes your wifey here. There's at least this part of the body and it's so good bro and I'm, I'm gonna eat that all summer and, wow, my diet has definitely gonna eat that all summer and wow my diet has definitely I've yeah, I saw your pictures, man anywhere from like 55 to 60 percent of my diet is fruit.
Speaker 2My god, nice fruit and um I keep gotta get there, bro, pray for me, lift me up in prayer. Most definitely, I keep. I keep cucumbers around if I want to snack on them. I keep a bowl of watermelon. I even juice so I have like, I have a jar of watermelon juice, I have a bowl of watermelon, I got grapes, I got blueberries, I got oranges, apples, bro.
Speaker 3That's what's up and I'm and.
Speaker 2I'm just constantly snacking on that man.
Speaker 3And those are the natural sugars too, man. Yeah, you know that's satisfying that sugar craving, you know.
Speaker 2And I'm not naming the high fruit, the high sugar fruit either, you know like mango and all that. Because you can eat too much of that. Of course, absolutely, but these pineapples with the cucumbers and that salad is so delicious man, my wife gonna go crazy over that too yeah, that jalapeno put that kick to it, bro, like I think I'm gonna just pick it up.
Speaker 3I'm just gonna hook it up for before I let her listen to this. Yeah, give me some points, give points, give me some love points on that, bro. Yeah, that's what's up, man. I love that dude, that's what.
Speaker 2I mean you put salt and pepper to taste Some people like to add Italian dressing to theirs. Whatever you get down with, but, definitely the olive oil and the lime juice that's what's up.
Speaker 3Man, definitely you know you had me with the vinegar boy okay, yeah, I love vinegar dude I could? I could just drink vinegar by itself there you go, man.
Speaker 2It goes well with it, because I had it without the vinegar and then with it yeah, yeah, no dope, dope yeah, dude man can't wait to get into that bro yeah, man hydrate yourself by eating it.
Speaker 3Uh, summer still got a couple of months, so yeah, and they say they're gonna be hot ones, bro, yes, all the way through people's acs yeah they keep going dude, because mine been on for two weeks straight, bro. Yes, sir, well, man bless that man. And great and great topic, man uh appreciate that man appreciate that, yeah, we gotta talk to the people, man.
Speaker 2Man, you know, we hear about, we about liberty, bro, you know, uh for sure, for sure that's why christ came.
Speaker 3Man says for freedom. That's why christ came to set us free.
Speaker 2Galatians 5 1 bro yeah, we got to understand that. You know I was going, I was willing, I was going to talk about the secular music again, but we'll do it another time.
Speaker 3We'll get that on another time.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3All right, people of God, we love you. People of God, we love you Peace.
Speaker 1Peace. Remember to like, subscribe and share.