Walking with the Savior - Testimonies of Jesus Christ in Christian Lives
Christian guests share their stories, testimonies, and journey with the Savior Jesus Christ. Also on Youtube: bit.ly/44Pm0Ug Testimonies range from lifetime believers to inmates transformed by the power of Jesus Christ. Come join us as real life, everyday saints, share their modern day testimony of the Savior.
Walking with the Savior - Testimonies of Jesus Christ in Christian Lives
God Did the IMPOSSIBLE for Me in My Darkest Hour. Trevor Heninger Testimony of Jesus
From suicidal thoughts to a life transformed by Christ's love, Trevor Heninger shares his powerful journey of redemption. Raised in a Christian home, Trevor struggled with perfectionism, pornography addiction, and feelings of worthlessness. At his lowest point, a timely text message prevented him from taking his own life, sparking a transformative journey to understand his purpose and masculinity. Through books, men's retreats, and allowing Christ's unconditional love to heal his broken heart, Trevor overcame his addiction and found new purpose. Now, he helps other men through his organization Rise Undaunted, offering programs and retreats to guide men towards confidence, purpose, and a deeper connection with God. Discover how Trevor's story of faith and redemption can inspire your own spiritual journey and relationship with Jesus Christ. Watch on YouTube
Listen as Trevor shares:
• His struggles with perfectionism and addiction
• The moment that saved his life
• How he learned to love himself through Christ's love
Book links
Wilde at Heart: https://amzn.to/420AG3G
Atomic Habits: https://amzn.to/3DL48Az
For more info on Trevor and his Retreat: https://riseundaunted.com/
00:00 Trevor Heninger
01:01 Trevor's Early Life and Family Background
02:52 Struggles with Perfectionism and Addiction
03:44 Revelation and Turning Point
06:23 Hitting Rock Bottom
07:33 A Lifesaving Message
11:49 Rediscovering Purpose and Masculinity
14:58 Embracing God's Love
18:46 Healing and Overcoming Addiction
22:16 Understanding Unconditional Love
23:26 Personal Reflections on Faith
23:58 The Power of Helping Others
27:57 Balancing Service and Self-Care
32:24 The Importance of Brotherhood
35:53 Rise Undaunted: A Community for Men
41:12 Upcoming Retreat Details
43:48 Final Thoughts on Faith and Brotherhood
Welcome everybody to this week's episode of walking with the Savior podcast. You're awesome, and I'm John Merrill Kirkman, and I'm your host Under this podcast we talk of Christ We preach of Christ and we podcast of Christ so that we can all be inspired to come unto Christ In this episode, Trevor Henniger shares his life journey, highlighting his struggles with perfectionism and pornography addiction. Raised in a Christian home, but experiencing significant and abuse Developed a need for perfection to feel loved. This pressure led to hiding his addiction and eventually contemplating suicide. A timely text message from a friend prevented him from ending his life, sparking a transformative journey. Trevor delved into understanding his purpose, masculinity, and spirituality through books and men's retreats. By allowing Christ's unconditional love to heal his broken heart, Trevor overcame his addiction and found new purpose, helping other men through his organization called Rise Undaunted. Let's jump in with Trevor.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Trevor, why don't you start off by telling us some of the mess you got yourself into in your younger years?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, geez. Um, well, I mean, I, I guess, uh, that's a, that's a good question.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:let's just jump right to the nitty gritty.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:so I mean, I guess I could say I was, I was raised in a very Christian home. Um, we did all the things, you know, like daily scripture study and prayer and all this stuff, right. And that was amazing. Um, the, the thing though, that really affected me, I think was that there was a lot of, uh, I guess the best word would be trauma in my house growing up. mostly from my older brothers, unfortunately they were really, uh, scoundrels.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Wow.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:and, uh, there was some stuff that just, you know, really kind of with my head, but, uh, but anyways, uh, that kind of that culture growing up in a home where there was a lot of, uh, I guess abuse or trauma, whatever. That kind of set the tone for my life in the sense that I felt like I needed to be perfect in order to be loved.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Wow
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Um, that's not what my parents taught me, you know, like they constantly told me they loved me. Um, but some, some, for some reason I had that and a lot of guys that I work with have that same problem. call it perfectionism, um, or we're just constantly expecting ourselves to be perfect. And when we mess up, we're really hard on ourselves. That's probably not you. Right.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:I've been there brother
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I was going to say, that's pretty common. I think so. Um, anyway, uh, I grew up heavily Christian, um, got married at age 21. Um, and did everything I thought I was supposed to be doing.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm hmm
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I struggled with a lot of things, this perfectionism thing. I struggled with a pornography addiction for, a long, long time. Um, the real, the real issue I think, um, came about 2016. Uh, I had, uh, because of this. thing that I was struggling with. I didn't tell my wife about the pornography addiction
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:that was on me. Right. I didn't tell her about it cause I was afraid that she was going to leave as soon as she learned about it. And, uh, and so I finally revealed it to her about around that 2016 time period. And
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:How long have you been married?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:at that point, uh, let's see, we were married in 99. So whatever the math, like,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:1617 years. Okay.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:yeah. Yeah, long, pretty long time. Um, I, uh, I was struggling as a man. I was unemployed I felt like it was my responsibility to provide for my family and I wasn't doing a very good job. We ended up, we were living in a 200 square foot travel trailer,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, man. So you have three kids.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, my wife and I had three kids and, uh, that was just, um, we'll just say that was really hard. I was really hard on myself I'd probably say that point I didn't love myself.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And, um, and so I wasn't feeling love from anybody else either. You know, I wasn't
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:That's hard.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:that love in.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm hmm So your wife was loving you, but you weren't your kids probably too, but you weren't you weren't allowing that in
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:it. Yeah. I wasn't
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, that's that's really interesting insight.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I think I wasn't even letting God love me.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:in a lot of ways, like I was resenting God
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I felt like I've done all these things. I've, I say the scriptures, I go to church every, every week, you know, I pray and I prayed for help with this pornography addiction, right. And I couldn't. Um, I couldn't it. I couldn't conquer it. You know what I mean? I felt like I'm, why am I, I'm all doing all these things and you're not taking this from me, you're not helping me with this. And so in a sense, I, that created some resentment and I don't know if you've ever experienced resentment, I imagine you have, it's another pretty common issue with a lot of people. Um, but what resentment does is it puts a wedge between you and the one you resent.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And, uh, I think I put a wedge between me and everyone.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, so it started with God and then it just flowed out to everyone. Is that how you would say?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. I put a wedge. I resented my wife.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, wow.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I resented all kinds of people. And it just, this was, um, I think that was really a big part of what I was going through and I got to the point where I. Decided I needed to take my own life because nobody cares. Nobody loves me. And it wasn't true. That was just my own belief. And I also have a belief and understand now that the devil was the one in my head telling me these things, like, you're not good enough. You're not a good enough dad. You're not a good enough husband. You're not a good enough provider. You know, um, I felt worthless and unloved and, uh, it's pretty hard to continue on when you've. When you've believed that lie. And so I had, I was like my, my wife, my wife and kids were going to be gone at a specific time to church meetings and stuff, youth groups, you know, so I was like, I'm going to just gonna, I'm going to end it on that, that evening when they're all gone, you know, and, uh, and I went to, to, they were all gone. I was going to do it. Then I got this text. I've got a text message I looked at it. It says what's wrong and I was like, whoa Right. I mean it really it doesn't matter who that text was from the fact of the matter is that Someone cared
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:whether that was the person who sent the text or whether God was telling them to send the text I don't really know I received that message And I'll say it's from God, it was from God, you know. to believe that he's always aware of us and he's trying to communicate with us. Sometimes we turn the radio station to the wrong frequency. And we don't hear him anymore, so maybe he has to communicate with us through someone else. But, uh, but
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Was this, was this a friend? Was it
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:a friend.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:friend just reached out to you in that moment? Does he know about this?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:It was actually a woman. actually a female friend. She reached out about, she, nobody knew what was going on with me. Um, cause I was, I was very secretive. I didn't want anybody to, to know I was struggling. I'm a man, right? Why am I going to ask for help?
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:That's the, that's the, that's the,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, that's the
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:that's, that's the problem, right? Like we men are like, I got this. And like, no, it's okay to say we don't.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:totally, totally. It is totally okay. But our, for some reason, the culture I grew up in, it was not okay ask for help, and I think that culture still exists a lot today.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, absolutely.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:we are battling it, but it's, it's a long, hard battle. But, um, anyway, so I didn't go through with, it obviously. Um,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:you. Thank you.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I'm glad now.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Thank you.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Um, but yeah, I don't know if that answers your question or not.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Well, okay. So you, your life, you know, hit this rock bottom and. This amazing text, which it just goes, man, I want to be that person. I want, I want to be that person that gets that message from God and says, send this person a text right now. You know what I mean? I'm like, man, I want to be that person. I need to dial that in because one of my passions, and this is why I wear these shirts a lot. You're awesome. I, uh, is, I just don't know who It's thinking about hurting themselves today. And if, if I walk by you in a grocery store, if I walk by you at the, whatever the mall, whatever, and I, maybe, maybe this could be like that magical text, but I, I love the idea of, well, I just want to, I want to seek that inspiration. I've heard stories like that. People that magically send that text. I w and we know it's God inspired by God. Right. And I just want to be that. I want to get to the point where I can hear God that clearly. in that moment of need that I'm his nine one, one that he can know he can call on John Kirkman. That's, and I'm still working on that brother, but man, that inspires me. That story inspires me,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I tell you what, John, I bet you you've already been that man. You probably just don't know it
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:man.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:because your heart's in the right place and that's all it really matters because even if you didn't receive that prompting per se. You probably can sense when other people are struggling. And I bet you you've sent texts similar to that, like thinking of you, how you doing? It doesn't have to be what's wrong, you know, anything like that. And, um, you know, that's, that's all because people aren't necessarily going to tell you what happened,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So true.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:So,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:I work with teenagers and they're a little more, you know, you know, closed to revealing those types of things. But where does the rest of your story continue and and Maybe the redemption side. How did, how did you pull yourself out of that from that point?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm. Great question. Um, so. really know what to do. I, I would just, cause I was, it's kind of like starting all over again, you know, no house, no, like I was just, we're living in travel trailer, you know? So like, yeah, I'm like,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:That is so hard.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:yeah. So I was like, well, I guess we're gonna, I'm just going to keep going. I'm just going to keep trucking. I'm going to start. Looking and, and, and seeing what we can figure out. Right. And, and, uh, just some miracles happened. Uh, we were able within a short period of time, we were able to get into a house, even though I didn't have any job, didn't have any security deposit. How does that happen? Never, you know, like it doesn't happen, but it happened for us. So we got into a house within a few months. Um, and I started searching, like, am I missing? I didn't know what I was missing. Let's just go with that. You know, I,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I didn't know exactly what I was missing. I didn't, I'll tell you what I was missing. I didn't understand what my purpose was. That's one of the things I was missing. I didn't have any passion in my life. Um, and I didn't understand, what my, I didn't truly understand what my role was. Like I didn't understand masculinity. Those are some three serious pieces that I was missing in my life. And so I found that out obviously after doing a
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So your role, your purpose, your masculinity. Okay.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:masculinity. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:masculinity.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Right. Right. And, um, the way I found those was, was I started digging into books like crazy. I started digging into men's, um, retreats and things like that. And after a few different retreats, I realized what I was missing. So that's why. I learned those things. Um, and, uh, so it took a few years actually to discover all that. It's about 2019 was when I really started to get the picture as to what I was missing. And, uh, and so then I just, after that, after I discovered those things, And started working on those things. My life started to truly change with my wife, got way better. My addictions, you know, able to conquer that sort of thing. You know what I mean? Instead of just floundering and constantly up and down all the time. Right. Um, uh, and, uh, and so, yeah, I don't know if, I don't know if that answers your question on that. On that part, where do you want me to continue
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Well, Let me ask you this. What role did the Savior play in your journey to overcoming your addiction, for example, and strengthening your marriage?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Um, that's a great question. So I would have to say love. Uh, you've probably heard the phrase. God is love, right? It's a scripture. And as I shared with you earlier, I didn't really love myself
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:didn't really allow, I wasn't allowing other people to love me.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:hmm. Mm
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And so that I had that resentment with God and, that resentment and, um, digging into having a more personal relationship with God, um, and allowing him to truly love me, I like to refer to what the scriptures call like the atonement of Jesus Christ, where Where Jesus Christ went to the Garden of Gethsemane and he suffered. He suffered so much that he bled from every pore. I can't imagine what that would be like. Cause I went through some pretty bad suffering, but it wasn't nearly enough to cause me to bleed. Helping me to understand,, what he went through, helped me to feel how much he actually cared about me as an individual, necessarily as humankind, but, but how did he care about me? Um, I believe that he would have done that for me. If I was the only one on earth and I believe that he would have done it for any one of us if we were the only ones here, that's how much he loves us. It's completely unconditional love. And that love that he has is extremely healing. If we're allowed, if we will allow that love to come into our hearts.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:hmm. So what was it that finally opened you up to his love? Was it just studying Jesus Christ atonement more for you and and and pondering that or was it? Something else.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I think it was actually, specifically reading a book, written by John Eldridge. written, he's an amazing author, a Christian, he's a Christian minister also a therapist. And he was saying in one of his books about talking about how our heart, it, uh, breaks time we, uh, like every time we experienced, if you want to say trauma or. Or something like that. It's like our heart gets a crack in it each
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Life's full of those. Life's full of those, right? I mean, it's like, if you ever dated you, you got a billion cracks.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Exactly. Exactly. That's my, that's my
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:If you,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:you went through junior high, your, your heart is shattered.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:exactly. My
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:If you ever apply, if you ever went through the process of looking for jobs,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:on and on, right?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Exactly. And so I read that book and I started to truly understand how my heart had been broken over and over and over again, and then it just was like, Hey, just Christ to come into your heart and heal that because Like he can do it, right? Problem is we just usually keep him at arm's distance. You know what I mean?
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. Oh yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And we don't
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Totally.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:that deep, right? We don't let him in to our actual heart to heal those cracks because he has the power to do that And so so I did and that that was very very healing for me.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:What was the process like for you to do that? You give us some tips or some ideas, suggestions. I
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:methods and I've, I've coached a lot of guys through that same thing. And, um, one of the ways that, uh, a lot of the time it's verbal verbalizing it is very important. Like just being able to say it out loud, getting into a place where you're all by yourself and inviting Christ to come into your heart or even Asking him to take your pain from you, you know, and like even physically handing it to him. were visualizing that he was there with you There's there's lots of different methods over the years that i've learned from other people's experiences. That's
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:love that.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:very healing Um, a lot of the time, what's really helpful. And this was one of the things that, I think it was John Eldridge as well, but there's so many books I've read. I kind of get them
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Sure, I get it
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:but like visualizing yourself as a child. Um, because the child we're, we're very innocent as children. Right. And, being able to just, rewind back to that childhood and, envisioning how, how would. How would you love that child? Like when, when, when you're, when you have your baby born, how do you feel about that baby? It's unconditional love, right? We never have a baby. And then we were like, Oh, I can't believe you're just sitting there pooping. Like you need to do something. That's not the way it works. Right. We just have unconditional
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:We oh look he smiled
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. It's, it's all about unconditional love. We have unconditional love for these children because they're innocent. It's not because they do something right. How often do we have conditional love for someone because we expect something from them. And when, when it doesn't happen, we don't give the love that's conditional, right? God has unconditional love. It doesn't matter what we do or don't do. His love never changes. It's a hundred percent unconditional the same way we have for that newborn baby. And so we can imagine that love that we have that newborn baby and being Uh, realize that that's the same love that God has for us. Very powerful, but also turning that around and loving ourselves that same way that we love that newborn baby. It's very healing.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:beautiful man, so how did this help you with your pornography addiction
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Oh, um, because I needed to learn to love bad parts of me.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Explain that that's a big concept
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. So I was only loving myself when I was doing what was right.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:The good the good trevor.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:exactly. I was only loving the good Trevor. I was only loving the perfect Trevor Right, which is impossible
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:perfect. Right and and so what that wasn't much love there, right? So So yeah, like when we when we love we need to love unconditionally The good, the bad, and the ugly. That's what true love really is. It's that unconditional love, no matter what happens. If I was to go kill somebody right now, God's love's not gonna change. He's going to love me the same, no matter what I do. for us to fathom. I think, cause it's probably not the way we were raised.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, absolutely.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Obviously I wouldn't do that, but you know, just an example.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So where are you at right now? With with God loving yourself and things like that, and how is Jesus show up for your life now?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Um, I tell you what, I always feel like I'm never, uh, feel like I'm never doing enough, unfortunately, but that, I think that's on that's me and my own expectations, right? Cause he gave me, he gave me everything. And so it's like, how can I give that? How can I possibly fulfill my end of the bargain? Right. If that makes sense. uh, the way that he's really helped me over the last few years. Other than the healing part is helping me to basically, he said, I need you to help men the way I helped you. Um, and it's not that I'm healing, it's not that I'm helping them or healing them or anything like that. Right. It's just guiding them through that process. one of the things I learned that was very powerful is I can't give something I don't have. So I don't have that unconditional love. For me, it's very difficult for me to give that unconditional love you, right? Sometimes God, he gives us love through other people because we aren't necessarily open to getting the love from him. You might've closed off, like whether it's that resentment or whatever, we might've closed off that communication. And so sometimes you have to start with that love from someone else. Before we can feel the love from God, it's going to be different for everyone. Right. But that's one thing that I've found is makes a difference. If I can give someone unconditional love can open up their heart.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:so what I'm hearing you say is kind of like we can't give more love than what we have and And maybe we you know somebody might come to us. I'm thinking as teenagers you know they come to us as a prickly prayer a prickly pear kind of this is an analogy right and And And maybe they've, they're prickly not just towards me and, and likely if they're prickly towards me, you know, they're probably prickly towards God.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:probably.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:But if I, But if I can come to him with kindness and love, despite the prickliness, then maybe it can open him up to God.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:totally.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:I don't know, that's, I'm just kind of like, internalizing this for myself, you know, and what I'm hearing you say and, you know, learning to love him. Myself to a greater degree feel that love of the savior and then reflect that on people who are Sometimes prickly when we help them when we try to help the injured right the wounded They're not always going to be the nicest because they're hurting
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:and they're struggling one thing I also was thinking about that I never really pieced together that part of the healing process is helping other people Heal
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. It's very powerful.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:because it sounds like that was gave you the purpose You And, you know, when God gave you this, this message, Hey, I want you to go help other people the way I helped you. Now all of a sudden you have purpose and it's almost like you're feeling greater redemption through helping others find redemption. Am I putting words in your mind for, or is that's not like,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:you're totally right. Yes, for sure. And that, that creates the passion in life too. Right. Like I didn't mention, I served. As I, when I was younger, I served a mission and was able and through my church and was able to really dig into that, like helping others and really like preaching about Christ and sharing the message that he has. Right. And that was very healing for me. But then once I got done with that, like just kind of, you know, slowly over years and years,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:passionate about it anymore. Right. Because I was too busy with everyday life. Stresses work and all the rest, you know?
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So when the savior is like commanding us to love one another and serve others. Sometimes we were like, I don't have anything more to give
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:that might be the answer that we need To find more healing in our own life and to experience more love in our own life Is that making sense? Like sometimes we think we think oh, I gotta go, you know Check out my neighbor because that's what caring people do, you know, or whatever, right? whatever you want to call the program and But but in reality, maybe the Lord's like I want you to go check on your neighbor You So you think a little less about yourself and can feel a purpose and feel healing through serving other people.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:you definitely can what i've noticed though and this is a
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Okay.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I think That I I wanted to point this out just because it's one of those details that we often miss That this happened to me and it's happened to a lot of other men is we get So caught up In serving
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:it's not necessarily what you're saying. Like I know like you're, you're, what you're talking about is very holy serving. Right. We get so caught up in. In serving, meaning I'm constantly working support, I'm constantly doing things for others and we kind of get into almost like a people pleasing type of serving
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:where we're always doing stuff for other people
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:to make them happy. If that makes sense.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:With wives, especially and stuff like that, we're trying to do these things. We want them to be happy, what happens is we kind of hit a point of burnout or overwhelm.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm. See you in a right second. Mm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:we really have a hard time actually serving for the right reasons when that happens
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm. Mm
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:because it's like, it's like you've flown on an airplane, I'm sure. Right. And they always tell you, what do they say when the mass fall out of the ceiling,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:before you try to help anybody else. Right? Because if you help someone else, then you pass out and die. You're no good to anybody. Right? So if you stop care of yourself, loving yourself, Taking care of your needs, your spiritual, spiritual needs, you're gonna be, you're not gonna be much good to anybody else.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And I think that's a true statement across the board, whether that's physically, mentally, spiritually, or whatever. And so I, I'm not, what you're saying is totally correct, but I just wanted to interject that one piece that we need to make sure that we're taking care of ourselves. Because when we're not, that's when we end up falling into the depths of despair and
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:suicide and things like that's when that comes into play. It's because we're out there serving everybody else and we're not taking care of ourselves.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:If you think of the commandment, what is the number one, top two commandments that Christ gave
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Mm, Mm,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:of God, right? With all thy heart, might, mind, and strength, I think is what it says.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah,
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:then love thy neighbor. As what?
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Myself.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:As thyself. So it's actually three commandments. Love God, love thy neighbor, and love thyself. And how often do we forget to love ourselves? We only love God and our neighbor. If we forget to love ourselves, we end up falling into the depths of despair and Satan knows it. And he takes advantage of it. And you look at the suicide rate for men. It is extremely high everyone. I mean, it's the highest it's ever been in the world.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, this is just crazy.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:But men are constantly serving and putting everyone else's needs before their own. And then they end up getting lower and lower and lower until they reach that point where they just can't go any further.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So that leads us into what you do now. And I mean, you, you had your own redemption story and you talked about it a little bit. Go help other men like you do. Tell us a little bit about what you do now.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Okay. Yeah. Thank you. Um, so I put it on my art to, to help lead men to, to, through that same process that I went through. Right. If you were 10 years ago, If I was going to be someone to lead men or coach men, I would have laughed at you and said, no way, I hate men are just a bunch of jerks. I don't want anything to do with men. Um, and, uh, but God changed my heart by going through my experience. He showed me that that's what other men are struggling with.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And it gave me an insight as to what a huge portion of men are struggling with. Um, and so I could have empathy for what they're going through
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:and I can have insights as to how they're feeling, which allows me to understand that and better be able to connect with them. And, so God led me through creating programs that help men overcome to get, not just for those men who are having suicidal ideations. Like every, almost every man out there struggling with something and just having someone to talk to is extremely powerful
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:does the Christian man do? What are the scriptures tell him to do? They tell him to leave his parents and cleave unto his wife, right? Well, sometimes he cleaves a little too hard, meaning he rejects, he just drops all his other relationships just Only has one relationship and that's with his wife
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:unhealthy
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:there needs to be a place, a point where he can, he needs to be able to go with other men who are strong, who are masculine, who are working on themselves and trying to be better versus themselves. If he's associating with them, then when he's struggling with something, he can share that with them. get the point of view and the help from them who are also been through that type of experience, right? Um, doesn't know because, I mean, it's not to say that she doesn't know, but she doesn't have the same experience because she's not a man. Right? So she has her own experiences of struggle that come from, from a woman. Like, I wouldn't have a clue what it's like to give birth. And I wouldn't even try to imagine what that was like. And so there's certain things that men and women have different things that they struggle with. Um, and so to have men that you can go to that are, aren't going to make fun of you when
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:actually struggling, actually just going to give you the unconditional love and support no matter what. That's extremely powerful and very healing. They're passing that love onto you.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm. So tell us a little bit about what your organization does. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Sure.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:What's your organization offers?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Sure. So rise on Daunted is just a community of men. Um, and at first I thought, I'm going to make this a free community because I want everybody to be able to participate. And it didn't work because there's a lot of men who just wanted to talk about the sports game on Sunday. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with socializing and having fun. Right. But this is a group of men who actually want results in their life.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:on Sunday, isn't going to bring that, you
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:And so, um, so we, uh, started charging, uh, we have two programs. is 25 a month, and that is, gives, uh, men, uh, meeting once a week where they can online or in person, depending on where they live. We have groups in different areas where they can connect in person or online. if they don't have a local group and, uh, this meeting, if you will, this gathering an opportunity for men to be able to connect, get unconditional love and support, learn together. We have, um, audio books that we're listening to together so that we can level up. Right. I've heard, I don't know who said this originally, but you'll get 1 percent better every day.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah, I love that. James Clear, Atomic Habits.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:right. There's a lot of people who have said it. And even if it was just 1 percent better a week, you know, it doesn't have to be every day, you know what I mean? Um, what a difference that makes because what tends to happen with most men is they, they get married. They, I hate to say it, but they end up becoming complacent with their life. They're not really driven or pursuing anything that they're passionate about or trying to get better. They just kind of like, Hey, things are good. I don't have to. You don't have to do any of that stuff, you know, like, and so the problem with that is that our wives don't like that guy. Our wives don't like the complacent guy. They like the guy who has a purpose, who has a passion,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:right? That. And so if men are struggling in a marriage, that's a, probably a very big reason why
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm. That's interesting.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:pretty passionate when they first got married, you know, like they were pursuing a degree in something they were pursuing a career in and they were pushing and And with all their might, right, to, to get certain things and then what happens, we lose that passion because we achieve, we've got it and now we're done, you know?
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Um, and so that's one of the things we help men do is help, help, we help them become more confident. We help them discover their passion. We help them discover purpose. Um, and, uh, anyways, uh, the other program we have is called create your life. And we literally help men to create the life that they want.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm. I like that.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:yeah, it's, it's a pretty amazing program. We have several coaches in rise undaunted. So that way we can handle a lot of growth and a lot of men. And, um, each morning, weekday morning, we have a few minutes where each man can kind of pick the time that works best for him within a range. You can pop on a. meeting a call or whatever we call it a check in and, uh, they can check in with other men who are also doing the same thing they have, they're, they're looking, they're either looking for or found their purpose, their passion, they're pursuing it and they're, and they're helping each other do that. And it doesn't take long. It's not like we're sitting there on a call for an hour every morning. It's just that quick little check in. And sometimes we need a little bit of an accountability, like say, I
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:lose 10 pounds of fat in the next, you know, three months, I need you guys to keep me accountable because I'm going to be exercising every day. And so each morning I'm going to check in and be like, Hey, right. I didn't exercise yesterday. You know, it's like, okay, give me 10 right now. But whatever that accountably looks like, it's going to be, it's going to be different for each guy because everybody has different goals. Right. But the fact of the matter is how much easier is it to hit your goals and dreams when you have other people that are supporting you, loving you unconditionally and keeping you accountable. So what you're working towards, like night and day difference, you live your
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:I love it.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:intentionally. morning you wake up with intention. What am I going to do today? Instead of just, I'm getting up, drink my coffee, go to work, come home, watch TV, go to bed. There's no intention in that. It's just surviving. It's just surviving. That's all it is. Live, you know,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:So tell us about your upcoming retreat that you're doing for men. And, uh, let's tell us about that opportunity because I think it's a phenomenal opportunity. When you were telling me about it, I was blown away.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:yeah, no problem. Um, thank you. A wild at heart. Um, John Eldridge is the, uh, one of the founders, I guess he's the main founder of wild at heart. He wrote a book called wild at heart. He's got retreats called wild at heart. And, um, so we're spot we have, we have lots of retreats that we do. This is the first time we've ever done a wild at heart retreat in rise undaunted. Um, and we're super excited because while the heart is a non denominational Christian organization, um, where, and we've got an Airbnb in the Richfield, Utah area. We're providing all meals, so you don't have to worry, you just show up, you got a bed, you got meals, um, provided for, and, uh, John Eldridge and his team, um, are gonna be speaking online, so they can learn from their experience, to better be, uh, Be able to step into their true masculinity, to learn more about connecting with God,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:Hmm.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:those cracks in your heart, those, those breaks. Right. Um, and, uh, it's a very powerful retreat. I've some of the best relationships I have in my life were formed at these retreats. and, uh, it's, it's nothing like I've ever experienced. I've been to three of them myself. So this is the first time I've ever hosted one. Um, but I'm just super excited about it.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:And when is this and how much is it?
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:Yeah. So, uh, it's, it's starts the evening of Thursday, January 23rd, 2025. it ends Sunday, the 26th in the afternoon after lunch, and it's$450. But yeah. So that's, that's what's
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:And I don't know if any of you've ever done one of these conferences. This, this four 50s, like a steal. Like I just looked up an overnight conference the other day. Uh, actually just today I looked up an overnight conference and it was 350. So four 50 for three days, I'm like, uh, yeah, it's. And it's just going to be like
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:barely just covering the cost of the Airbnb. I mean, the Airbnb is you, they were ridiculously expensive. but,
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:20 guys and 20 guys, uh, learning together to, to grow and improve and connect with God and heal our hearts. I mean, that just sounds amazing. Let's, let's end with this, uh, Trevor, who have you come to see the savior as if you, as you look through your journey, your life journey, the, uh, and, and our relationship with the savior evolves and, and ebbs and flows. And right. You, you had a wedge in your relationship with God at one point in your life and, uh, who's he come to be for you now in your life? Yeah.
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:I would say he is a brother, like, which is hard for me because my brothers didn't set the greatest example, but he's more of like the brothers I have now in Rise Undaunted, the relationships that I have with these brothers. Would do, they would do anything for me. They would, they would die for me. And I, I, for them, the relationship I have with my saver. And it's so much better than it ever has been, you know, because of that, being able to understand more fully who he is and how much he cares, uh, just like truly having an older brother that would do anything and give anything free for me. Is life changing.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:And to personally feel that connection is, is where it's at. We can, we can talk about it. in the mind, right? But when we come to feel that for ourselves and allow the savior into our hearts and into our lives to to transform and to heal that heart and the wounds we've been through. And I kind of feel like We have to go through that brokenness so that we can truly experience the healing power of Jesus Christ and know him and love him at a different level. Like if we went through this life just and skated through and never once had a single problem and never had a broken heart, which we know is impossible. We would never reach out for him who desperately wants to have that relationship with us. And he would never be able to heal our heart the way he can with a broken heart. So
squadcaster-c6ci_1_12-30-2024_200154:agree.
john_1_12-30-2024_200154:thank you so much for the work you're doing, Trevor, to, uh, help men heal their hearts by coming to Christ and connecting with him and, and, uh, becoming better men, right? Gaining passion in life. I love the work you're doing and I, I just, I support what you're doing because I know it aligns with that. My mission, which is to talk of Christ, preach of Christ so that we can all come unto Christ. And thank you so much for coming on today. And I want to thank all our listeners for joining us. And Hey, if you haven't hit that subscribe button, hit that subscribe button, join us every Sunday for episodes of where we interview people about their journey with Jesus Christ. Have a great week, everybody.