Choose Kindness Over Contention In the wake of Charlie Kirk's Death Ep. 84

This episode is a heartfelt call to spread positivity, compassion, and love in times of chaos and division. In this poignant episode of the Walking with the Savior Podcast, the host reflects on the recent tragic death of Charlie Kirk and urges listeners to choose kindness over contention. Drawing from personal experiences, religious insights, and inspirational quotes, this episode is a heartfelt call to spread positivity, compassion, and love in times of chaos and division.

00:00 Introduction

00:38 Reflecting on the Tragedy of Charlie Kirk's Death

02:13 The Negative Impact of Contention

02:42 Christ's Call to Be Lights in the World

05:48 Quotes on Kindness and Compassion

15:29 Brian Hansen's Unoffendable Insights

19:49 Personal Reflections on Kindness

24:40 The 10x Challenge

27:59 Positive Impact Stories

30:11 Call to Action

35:40 Conclusion: Choosing Positivity and Kindness

Listen to us on your favorite platform:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414656



Email John: walkingwiththeSaviorpodcast@gmail.com

#bibleverses #bible #spiritualawakening #jesuschrist #jesus

#jesuschrist #spiritualawakening #bible #selfimprovement #jesus

Transcript

0:00

Welcome everybody to this week's episode of Walking with the Savior Podcast. I've got a special deviation from my normal programming. This week is, I'm recording on a Sunday morning after the tragic slain of Charlie Kirk. I felt like I needed to share a message and share some thoughts on this topic and to discuss some challenges that I have for you too. Hopefully transform your life in this time of uncertainty and chaos and confusion and criticisms of words that we hear so readily on social media. First of all, I was absolutely devastated at the assassination of Charlie Kirk. Kirk, not because I am a huge fan of his, I never had heard, even heard of Charlie Kirk before. I've tried to distance myself in recent months from the news and from, some of the political arenas because it became so contentious and, and I get so much negativity from the news that I wanted to, distance myself from it. And so I, I haven't heard of Charlie Kirk until this week, and I. Admire a lot of the things he's said and, don't agree with everything. But I really value that he is willing to have a discussion with people and conversation and hopefully promoting that. What I'm struggling with right now, first of all is this has just been day of his stating, uh, for me personally, as I've seen friends and I had a sister who was at the event. I've, uh, run into former students who were at the event. My heart breaks for them, and obviously Charlie's family. I'm just devastated by it. I'm devastated by the negativity on social media, one side blaming the other side and that side blaming the other side. Much contention has arisen on social media because of this, and for that, I'm saddened. I've seen some hateful comments. I've heard of family group chats blowing up into major disagreements over the death of a man who maybe lives hundreds or thousands of miles away from them. It, it has caused great trauma to see the contention, to see the hate, and I wanted to share some thoughts. The Savior has called us to be lights in the world as disciples of Christ. Darkness cannot contain light. The only way to overcome darkness is to add a light, light in the form of love, kindness and compassion, positivity and encouragement go much farther than the criticism, complaining, categorizing, and judging and condemning that we're starting to see on social media. It has caused me great pain to see the blaming hateful words, the hateful speech coming from each side of the argument. At this time, there's a great need to listen, to show up with compassion, to show up with caring and kindness. For example, if, if someone hated Charlie, one might say. I'm, I'm so sorry. You know, I sense that there's some deep hurt. Help me to understand what that hurt is. I just wanna sit with you, be with you, and understand your pain. Like when people have hate for somebody, there's some pain there. And if we could just choose to sit with somebody in their pain that. Can lead to healing and compassion, and the only way to heal sometimes from our pain is to feel love from somebody that allows us to let go of that pain. Perhaps on the other side, you come across somebody who is a big fan and follower of Charlie and they're hurting, and maybe you don't feel the same way, but if we could choose to be compassionate in that moment. And say, I'm so sorry. This was a horrendous event to witness something like this. And though there were 3000 people there who witnessed this event, millions more have witnessed this event because of video on social media and whether they, we believe it or not, that watching that violent of an act. Of a real person. No acting involved here causes serious pain and hurt. And so if we can show up in people's lives and say, how are you doing, man, that was so painful, such a painful week. But what, what I matter most right now in this instance is, how are you doing, my friend? How are you doing? And then perhaps reaching out with, you know, Hey, can I give you a hug and just listening, sitting in that place and say, yeah, your pa, your pain and your feelings are valid. I am gonna share some quotes that I've been ruminating over, and that could be really helpful in this situation. Maryanne Williamson said, everything we do is either an act of love or a cry for help. And I see that in this situation. I feel desperately sad, deeply sad for the family of this young man who was the killer. I don't blame them. I don't blame. I, I think they were great parents. I think a young man was crying for help and nobody saw it. And I don't blame anybody. But we've also gotta do better helping young men deal with disagreement, deal with pain, deal with mental health, deal with hurt, deal with sorrow, inappropriate ways. So the acts like this are less likely to come out. For centuries, we, and, or, or maybe, maybe not centuries, maybe decades, but we, in American society, society to men, we say, toughen up, deal with it. You know, hide your pain. Don't show your weakness and don't cry. And that's what that mentality must go away. Those mentalities lead to violent acts. We need compassion. The Dalai Lama said, compassion is core. You don't need religion to practice, love, kindness, and service to others. Peace begins with more compassionate, ethical world, starts with individual's choosing wisdom and care. Moment by moment, Ralph Waldo Emerson said there can be no access to love. Leo bus. Too often we underestimate the power of a, of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. I think about that the, the smallest act of caring. A smile, a kind word, a listening ear, have the potential to turn a life around. A little later on, I'm gonna give you a challenge that implements that quote, quote, and I promise, not only will it change your life, it will change other people's lives. Wayne Dyer Kindness extended, received or observed beneficially impacts the physical health and feelings of everyone involved. Imagine this. Observing kindness boosts serotonin levels in the brain, making everyone feel more peaceful and blissful. Now, I don't have the opposite quote, but I'm thinking the opposite is exactly the same. Let me create the opposite. Hatred and mean acts extended, received or observed negatively impacts the physical health and feelings of everyone involved. Imagine this, even just observing physical acts of, of hate, anger, and bitterness reduces serotonin levels in the brain, making everyone feel more anxious and sorrowful. I think that's what we're seeing and we're spewing out more negativity by talking meanly and create and negatively to people, which just leads to the opposite of what we want. So President Russell M. Nelson, the president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, just turned 101 by the way, and he says this anger never persuades. Hostility builds no one period Contention never leads to inspired solutions as disciples of Jesus Christ. We are to be examples of how to interact with others, especially when we have differences of opinion, of opinion. One of the easiest ways to identify true follower of Jesus Christ is how compassionately that person treats the other people. I wanna be known, uh, as somebody who treats people kindly. Not just because I want to be known, but because it feels so good to treat people with kindness. That's the point we're missing here is like I do and say mean things and I feel mean dirty and hateful inside. And it's like chewing and swallowing tar. It's not gonna get any better as it goes down. Wow. On the other hand, when I do kind, I say kind and I smile at people and I encourage them. I feel so good inside and I want to do even more of it and find more ways to get that feeling because it is the best feeling, and I'm gonna give you an idea of how to do that a little later. Russell M. Nelson, the Savior's message is clear. His true disciples build up, lift up, encourage, persuade, and inspire. No matter how difficult the situation true disciples of Jesus Christ or our peacemakers, one of the best ways we can honor the savior is to become a peacemaker. The Savior's atonement made it possible for us to overcome all evil, including contention. Christ is the answer in the moment of this pain, this moment of anger in the world. And that's me. The Russell Nelson quoted at in it, at Overcome All evil, including contention. And I added that's what this world needs, that we. We can't be. We. We need Christ and to choose to act like Christ in these moments, and when we do, we feel good. President Nelson continues Contention drives away the spirit. Every time. Contention reinforces the false notion that confrontation is a way to resolve differences, but it never is. Contention is a choice. Peacemaking is a choice. You have your agency to choose contention or reconciliation. I urge you to choose to be a peacemaker now and always. True disciples of Jesus Christ are willing to stand out, speak up, and be different from people of the world. If there's anything virtuous, lovely or of good report or praiseworthy that we can say about another person, whether to his face or behind her back, that should be our standard of communication. End of the quotes by President Nelson, Brian Johnson. One of my heroic coaches sits Smile more often. Act with more warmth. Act with more kindness to your family and colleagues and random people you meet during the day. And notice how they respond. And I would add, notice how it feels. Kindness isn't just a virtue, it's a superpower that uplifts everyone. It touches what small acts of kindness can you do today? To make it happen. So here's my challenges. My challenge number one is choose to be un offendable. I read a book by Brant Hansen, a Christian man, and let's just look at this scripture before I go to that book and share some quotes. This quote, by Jesus I say, you love your enemies. Bless them to curse you. Do good to them to hate you. Pray for them. Which Spitefully use you and persecute you? Do you hate Charlie Kirk? Jesus would say love him. Do you hate Charlie Kirk? Christ would say, bless him. Do good to him. Pray for him. Is there somebody out there that has caused you hate because of Charlie Kirk's word? Christ would say, love that person. Just love. Just choose to love them. Bless them. Be a blessing to them. Show them some kindness. Do good to them in the face of their negativity in your life. Now, of course we're talking. We're not talking about abuse. If somebody's abusing, the first thing is make sure you are safe. Get out right. But now Jesus Christ is saying, if we can in a safe place, just love them. Bless them. Do good to them, pray for them. Now I wanna share some quotes from Un Offendable by Brent Hansen, and I love this book. It was fantastic read. He's a great storyteller and I wanna read some quotes from his book. He says, choosing to be un offendable or relinquishing my right to anger does not mean accepting injustice. It means actively seeking justice and loving mercy while walking humbly with God. And that means remembering I'm not him. What a relief. The thing that you think makes you anger. Excuse me. The thing that you think makes your anger righteous is the very thing you are called to forgive. Grace isn't for the deserving. Forgiving means surrendering your claim to resentment and letting go of anger. Perhaps part of being less offendable is seeing that human heart for what it is, untrustworthy. Unfaithful prone to selfishness. Got it. Now we don't have to be shocked. We, I love that one. Now we don't have to be shocked. Next quote from Bran Hansen. Real humility lies in self forgetfulness. Few want to hear this, but it's true and it can't be enormously helpful in life. Excuse me. Sorry. Lemme start that one over. Real humility lies in self forgetfulness if you wanna hear this, but it's true and it can be enormously helpful in life. If you are constantly being hurt, offended, or angered, you should honestly evaluate your inflamed ego. Oh, that one stung me. Anger is extraordinarily easy. It's our default setting. Love is very difficult. Love is a miracle. Being offended is a tiring business. Letting things go gives you energy. Choosing to be un offendable out of love for others is ministry. Quit trying to parent the whole world. I see this right now on social media. I'll continue the quote. Quit trying to parent the whole world. Quit offering advice when exactly zero people ask you for it. Quit being shocked when people don't share your morality. Quit serving as judge and jury in your own mind of that person who just cut you off in traffic. And I would add. Or that person who just posted something about Charlie Kirk on social media. Quit thinking you need to discern what others' motives are and quit rehearsing in your mind what that other person did to you. Yes, the world is broken, but don't be offended by it. Instead, thank God that he's intervened in it. He's going to restore it to everything it was meant to be. His kingdom is breaking through. Bit by bit recognizing and wonder at it. Last quote, by Brandt Hansen, we should forfeit our right to be offended. That means forfeiting our right to hold onto anger. When we do this, we'll be making we a sacrifice that's very pleasing to God. It strikes at our very pride. It forces us not only to think about humility, but to actually be humble. Now this choice to be un offendable, I read this book, I've read this book now three times. I grew up in Southern California and everything was about offendable. Everything was about taking offense. Everything is about what you looking at man, and, and contention and anger filled the streets of my neighborhood and I've had to work to give up. Taking offense and I still have to work at it, but let me tell you, life is so much easier by laying a fence on the side of the road. Life is so much better by letting go and choosing not to get offended at everything because that's the way I was with ER and when, when I was younger. And life is so much more peaceful by choosing to not take offense. And I'll tell you another thing, a decision I made this year, I'm not gonna give space in my heart to not like somebody. There is no room in my heart to not like somebody because no matter how bad a person is, if we get to connect with them. We can find much good in every soul, and I'm trying to live a life and I'm not perfect. I'm still working so hard at this, but I wanna be there for people. I want to care for people. I wanna be a hero in somebody's life, not to get recognition, but because people are so valuable, I like to think of it like the firemen. You know, the firemen, I've heard stories. The firemen show up to the, you know, the fire and some, or, or, or a place where somebody's hurt and injured. And sometimes they get to a scene and, and there's somebody in the house, you know, that's got a gun and, and they're shooting at the firemen and the policemen and the firemen and the police are hiding. And then something will go down and the, the, the man inside with a gun will get injured. And what do the firemen do? They will run in and care. For the man who was just shooting guns at them. The fireman's job is not to be liked. They, they don't have a place to like, they can't choose to like, oh, I'm gonna not like you. I'm gonna not care for you because you were shooting a gun at me. No, my job is to care for you regardless. And I feel like that is a true Christian to care for all people regardless. And I know what some of you're like, well, yeah, but what about murderers? I know that sounds scary, but I've actually been in prison, not myself personally, but I, I used to go into prisons and teach during the summer, teach, uh, Bible studies and things like that, and I actually had the opportunity to teach on several occasion people who are child abusers and murderers. And what I can tell you is this, in those moments where we opened up and got real and talked about Jesus Christ, the message I got from the Savior almost every time was let these people know that I, their savior, Jesus Christ, loves them, still loves them, and have never stopped loving them. These people are still lovable. And so are all the people that you disagree with on social media. We can find ways to hear them, to show up with compassion. I see you. We could say something like this. I see you hate Charlie Kirk. What not. Not to change their mind, but to sit with them in their pain. I sense there's some pain there. Can you tell me about it? Help me to understand your pain and to sit with people in their pain and to let them feel and that let them feel our love and our care for them, and that they are more important than the issue of whether or not they like Charlie Clark now. Choosing to be un offendable has changed me as a teacher. Choosing to not have space in my heart to not like a student, has changed my heart as a teacher. It's given me more freedom. It's like before I'd be like, oh, I don't want that kid to come today. I know that sounds really rude as a teacher, but teachers know what I'm talking about. There are classes that go better when sometimes when a kid doesn't come. But because I don't have room in my heart to not like that kid now, now it's, it's fine. If he comes, I'm fine. You're here. I love you. I want you here. And it's so much, so liberating. Now here's my second challenge and my second challenge is the 10 x challenge. It's a challenge. I came up with my giving away shirts that say You're awesome. I now give them away with. A note that says, um, congratulations, you got a 10 x shirt. I'll read it to you. I'll read the note, let me see if I can find it. And I came up with the 10 x challenge because this year, because of a dear friend of mine, I was able to get 500 t-shirts to give away to teenagers at football games or um, or just out and about. I give away t-shirts and I came up with, I decided to come up with a T challenge for my ninth graders, and that's the 10 x challenge. So here's the 10 X challenge on the note that I give away with my t-shirts. So I roll up my t-shirts and I attach this note and then I throw'em out at football games and the student section says, you got it. You're awesome T-shirt, simply because you are awesome. Now for the 10 x challenge. On the day you wear this shirt, tell 10 or more people that they are awesome. You can say it. You can say You're awesome, you're amazing, you're fantastic. You're gold, you're incredible. You got this. You are fantabulous, or any other positive message. Now, here's the promise as you send out positive messages. Watch, as others say, positive messages to you. The more you send out positive energy, the more positive energy will come back to you. That is the power of your awesome t-shirt. Give it a try. It feels great. Now I know I don't have t-shirts to give all my listeners. I wish I did. And if you would love to donate money to the your awesome t-shirt campaign, feel free to message me at um, walking with the Savior podcast@gmail.com. We can work something out. Okay. I'm not looking for sponsorships. I'm just looking for, hey. If you're le ready to, you know, help me with some t-shirts and change the world one t-shirt at a time, let's do it. But this is what happened the other day. Uh, so I began this journey, uh, with t-shirts a year, a year ago, but with the signs, with the messages, the first home game was last Friday, not um, let's see, Friday, the Friday before Charlie Kirk was slang, and I feel so grateful. That I did it before because I feel like this is what the world needs. Um, and then that Monday before is when I challenged my students, my ninth grade students. I have a hundred and a hundred ninth grade students, and I gave them the challenge to change the school. And for the ninth grade students, they have to earn the t-shirt. And the way they earn it is by telling 10 people a day for 10 days that they are awesome. Now let me share some stories. Just the other day I had this high school senior coming to class and he was wearing the Your Awesome T-shirt. And I was like, Hey, you're awesome. And I said, how's it been going? Because he got a T-shirt with the note. I said, have you been doing it? He said, yes. And then he said, you're awesome Brother Kirkman. And then I said, and he said, and that's 25. He had told 25 people. That they were awesome. And I said, and how's it been? And he said, smiled huge smile. And he said, it's been fantastic. And I said, how much positivity? How many people told you that you were awesome? He's like, I don't even know. So many people told me that. You're awesome. This other kid comes in the other day, this ninth grader brother carpenter. I've told 14 people that they're awesome. I'm like, how's it feeling? This kid was on fire. He is like, man, it's awesome. I wanna keep going. That's the power of your awesome, and it comes back to you. And what's interesting is I grew up in this community where everybody was trying to be better than somebody by telling others they suck. I literally remember having conversations with people on the, on the PE yard in junior high, people saying, you suck white boy. Sorry for the racist point, but that's what they would say to me. You suck. And it was almost like they were trying to put themselves up by making me feel worse and putting me down. But what I've found with the, you're awesome. Telling people you're awesome is that it works the opposite way. I say to people, you're awesome, and they say, no, you are awesome. I say, you're more awesome. And they say, no, you're more awesome. I'm like, what? In other words, we keep building people up and pushing them up above us. It's fantabulous. It's fantastic. Try it. Now, here's a simple way I've found to do it because I've tried and experimented with this a lot. I could walk up to somebody and just say, Hey, you're fantastic, and they look at me and go, oh, that's kind of out of the blue, but here's another way you can ask them a question. So I just did this in the grocery store yesterday. I would ask somebody for help on finding something. Now, it honestly was an excuse just to ask somebody a question. I asked this lady, Hey, do you know where the chips are? She looks around. She looks up and down the store aisles. Oh, they're right there on aisle 30. Thank you so much. And then I looked her in the eye and I said, Hey, you are awesome. She looked at me, tilted her head and say, thank you. Yeah. It feels so good people. It feels so good. Well, you join the 10 X challenge, pick your phrase. Hey, you're gold, you're amazing. And last here is do one small kind. Act today. Do one small kind, act today. It looks like this as I was checking out of the grocery store yesterday. You don't have to do the same call out, but here's an idea. It's so simple. It's so cheap, and it feels good. I said to the. Checkout lady. Um, well, I was checking out with my groceries and I turned around and there was a lady checker behind me in the other aisle, and she didn't have any customers. So she had turned around and I looked at her and I said, Hey, you're awesome. And she goes, hi. And we, we reconnected. Come to find out, she had been a friend of my daughter's about 8, 9, 10 years ago. And I said, uh. Hey, I'm, I'm looking over the candy and I'm just, I'm not sure which one I need today. What, what's your favorite candy? She said, oh, she pointed one out. I love these. She said, I said, great. I'm gonna grab one of those. And then as I checked out, I paid for it, and I turned around and I gave it to her and said, Hey, I bought these for you. I want you to know I appreciate you, and you're awesome. A little act of kindness. It's worth two bucks every time I go to the grocery store, it's so awesome. And on top of that, multiple times, my son has seen me do that. I remember that quote earlier by Wayne Di. When people just see X of kindness, it raises serotonin, that love drug that's inside of us, the happy drug and. It boosts happiness, and that's what I want my kids to see. I'm not doing it to get glory. I'm not doing it to get praise. I do it first of all, because I care about people and then I'll just be honest. It feels so good to do kindness and to do service. So here's the reality. Why have we all been so down? This past week, whether you like Charlie Kirk or not, it's because we've seen awful acts that honestly are satanic. Satan inspired these acts. We've seen a murder, people running for fear, and then we've seen people on the internet saying horrible, mean things all over the place. And it just spreads pain and hurt. But if we can respond with kindness, be un offendable and choose the 10 x challenge of positivity, we spread Christ. The world cannot contain our light. When he said, you are the light of the world, what he meant is you are the kindness. You are the love. You are the caring. You are the compassionate. You are the friendly. You are the listener. You are the one that shows up. My heart was so hurt this week. It was so painful. To watch America Crack. Not only was there the Charlie Kirk, there was this shooting school shooting. There was on and on the memorial for nine 11 I, but I asked you to join me by flipping the switch and choosing positivity. Kindness has become. My happy drug with no negative consequences. I hope you'll join me, my friends. I want you to know you're loved, you're valuable, I hear you. Will you please share this episode with somebody who needs it, and let's walk more like the savior by choosing to be more kind. And if you mess up. No big deal. No big deal. Choose the next day to show up as a hero of kindness. I love you guys. I love all of you. I love everyone. And if I were here, I'd give you a big hug. You are truly a friend. You are truly valuable. You are needed in this world, and I care for you. You are awesome. Thank you for joining me this week on Walking with the Savior Podcast. And may you have a great walk this week with the savior. Have a great day everyone. Thank.