Demystifying Child's Play | Play Schemas

014 Play Schemas & The Love Language of Physical Touch | Understanding Your Child’s Needs

Ruth Vercoe Episode 14

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Did you know that something as simple as a hug, a high-five, or a game of tag could be the key to your child feeling deeply loved and secure? In this episode, we’re exploring Physical Touch as a love language—how it shapes your child’s emotional development, why some kids crave it more than others, and how you can easily incorporate it into everyday moments of play.

For many parents, physical touch comes naturally in the early years—rocking, holding, carrying—but as children grow, affectionate touch often fades into the background. And if your love language isn’t physical touch, you might find yourself wondering: “Am I giving my child what they need to feel truly loved?”

💡 Here’s the good news: You don’t need to be a “cuddly” parent to make this love language work. Physical touch isn’t just about hugs—it can be playful, fun, and part of your daily routines!

Let’s start by addresing something important: body safety and consent. In a world where we’re constantly teaching our kids about personal space and “safe touch,” how do we also make sure they’re getting enough loving, appropriate, and secure physical connection? That’s why I’ve partnered with Victoria Barendsen from The Safe Kids Project, a registered psychologist specialising in childhood trauma and body safety. If you want to feel empowered in teaching your child about safe boundaries, check out her ‘Foundations of Body Safety’ course—and get a special discount just for listeners at https://thesafekidsproject.com/ and use the code playschemas10 at checkout for a 10% discount.


🎧 What You'll Learn in This Episode:

✔️ Why Physical Touch Matters – The emotional and developmental benefits of affectionate touch
✔️ How Play Naturally Encourages Physical Connection – Simple ways to build touch into your child’s day
✔️ Age-Appropriate Ways to Use Physical Touch – From toddlers to tweens, what works best?
✔️ Respecting Boundaries – Teaching consent without withdrawing affection
✔️ Easy, Everyday Play Ideas for Connection – No extra effort required!


🤹‍♀️ Using Play to Connect Through Touch
Physical touch doesn’t have to feel forced—it’s naturally woven into so many types of play! In this episode, I share:
🎯 Rough-and-Tumble Games – Chase, tag, tickling, piggyback rides
🎨 Sensory Play – Messy play with dough, mud, and textures
🎵 Rhythmic Clapping & Hand Games – Fun ways to include gentle touch
🎠 Swinging & Spinning – Playful movement that strengthens connection
💡 Building Together – Snuggle in a fort, sit closely while crafting, or create hand-linked towers


👉 Want a FREE Play Schema Guide? Grab yours at playschemas.com/free!


📲 Follow along on Instagram: @play_schemas for daily parenting tips!
💬 Join the conversation: What’s your child’s favourite physical play activity? Comment below or DM me!

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