A Kiss and a Cupcake for LA

The wildfires in Los Angeles - particularly in the Pacific Palisades - have significantly impacted the girls' loved ones, family members, and friends. In this episode, they navigate every day life while the biggest fire in L.A.’s history is taking ruin on the city they love. After being evacuated, Sage hunkers down with Emily in Venice.  They keep busy drooling over the conquering efforts of firefighters, debating whether or not to respond to the online dates and other random men coming out of the woodwork, and venturing out for an extra special trip to In-N-Out Burger with extra "animal".  

Transcript

Emily (00:00):

Hey Watch Me Do It, friends. This is your co-host, Emily. Before we get into this episode, Sage and I need to acknowledge the horrific events that are happening as we record this episode in the Pacific Palisades, Altadena, Pasadena, Sylmar, Malibu, Hollywood Hills, Studio City, and now Woodland Hills and Calabasas areas over January 7th, 8th, 9th, maybe even longer. We are hopeful that by the time this episode drops on Tuesday, this will all be behind us. We know many of you are new listeners to Watch Me Do It, and we're happy you’re here and we welcome you to the show. But you may not know that we live on the Westside of Los Angeles, right next to the largest fire, the Palisades Fire.

Sage (00:47):

Yes, it has been very heavy hearted here and just in the realm of, it's unbelievable. I've never seen anything like this in the 24 years that I've lived in Santa Monica on the border of the Palisades. In fact, we're recording this episode on the floor of Emily's Venice studio since our producer has also been evacuated like myself, and he does not have power in his studio where we typically record.  The same, actually, studio that Emily's had as an Airbnb when she first moved here, which marks about one year ago to the day.

Emily (01:32):

It's tomorrow - marks my one year anniversary living in Los Angeles, literally to the day. And the city welcomed me with a warm, big bear hug last year. And as you all know, if you've been following along, it's been an incredible year for me, just so jam packed, and I wish I could just now hug the city back. There's really no words to describe the scary, helpless, completely devastating feeling of watching Los Angeles just burn out of control wildfires. And yeah, it is like nothing before for sure. And Sage has called the Westside of Los Angeles her home for 24 years, and you are deeply rooted in the Pacific Palisades neighborhood. Even me, I'm new to the city and I have dear friends who live there who have lost their homes. They've lost everything. The community is gone. They're wondering how to rebuild, as is Altadena.

(02:32):

They're not alone. And so we've had a lot of downtime the past few days. It's felt like an eternity. And I'd say one of the things that I've been reflecting on this week is just take this as a reminder just to take nothing for granted, nothing. I have this bucket list of things I still want to do in Los Angeles, and I never hiked Runyon Canyon. This sounds so silly now, but I never hiked Runyon Canyon and it burnt last night and it's not there. And Malibu is completely off the map, and I'm just so grateful that I got to drive the PCH before it burnt to the ground. So never kick the can down the road. Carpe Diem friends, go to that place. Take that trip. Support your small businesses. Please hug that person extra hard. Enjoy your home. No matter how big or small or messy your home may be, have the dinner party, buy the new couch because you truly never know when it could be gone forever. And this is unfortunately not going to be the last of a natural disaster of this devastation that we see.

(03:43):

Sage and I know that we're a comedy show, and so this is obviously a very different tone, but it is where we're at. We often roast Los Angeles in our show, if you know, because how can you not? I mean, this city is vibrant. It's funny, it's utterly dynamic. It is full of chaotic layers. It's perfect for storytelling. It is perfect for dream making. You guys know, I came out here not really knowing what the hell I was doing, and she taught me to dream again. And she is our home. She's our community. We love her. Los Angeles is a stunningly beautiful, sophisticated lady who is now deeply scarred and she's smudged, but she will heal. She will heal as we all do.  As we have personally, Sage and I, healed with time and of course a small dose of humor.

Sage (04:39):

So we decided whether or not to follow our regular content roadmap, so to speak, or to address what's happening here in Los Angeles. But while our podcast is typically comedy, talk about sex and dating and relationships…

Emily (04:58):

Which can be apocalyptic in its own way, so…

Sage (05:00):

Totally.

Emily (05:01):

But our podcast is about our real lives in Los Angeles and all the crazy shit that's happening to us no matter what it is. And this has been the stuff that we've been up to for the last week. Like Santa Monica is still evacuated. We don't know. We both have a go bag packed. This is the first time I've ever had to do that. And it might be extreme because Venice is not in harm's way, and it would be so unlikely for it to come here, knock on wood. But you really never know with these extreme weather events. And so I just think, you know, that's one of the weird experiences I'd say over the last couple days is what do you put in this go bag? And as I'm looking at it now, it's like I packed four pairs of jeans, but no tops at all. I was looking at my closet and I'm just standing there and I'm looking at all these clothes, and most of these clothes are new because when I came to LA I didn't plan to be here for a year or forever. So I bought all these new clothes and they're all hanging in my closet. And I just thought, nah, I don't need that. And I was planning to leave it all.

Sage (06:14):

Yeah, it's.. all of it's materialistic in my opinion. If the couch burns down and the TV burns down and my clothes burned, it's replaceable.

(06:28):

So I literally came with a basket of a pair of jeans, pajamas, like three shirts and a sweater, and I've been wearing the same shit.  Again, here I am staying in Venice with Emily in her studio. And I am already packed to go because I've been a refugee since August. When mold… 

Emily:

Your apartment hates you.  It’s like go away.

Sage:

Yes. My apartment doesn't want me there. It's like since August of 2024. First it's mold - had to move to Venice next door to the studio where Emily resides. Then hopefully by December, get the chance to get back into my own place in Santa Monica. Well, now it's like Happy New Year 2025. Now I'm evacuated because of a fire. Venice is calling my name and my place in Santa Monica is like, bitch, get out of here.

Emily (07:21):

Although we are not that far away because I could see the beginning of the Palisades fire from my kitchen window and we obviously can smell it. And then today there were ashes dropping all over my car, parked outside.

Sage (07:33):

Oh, everyone's car.

Emily (07:35):

And on my dog. And I'm looking at him like, what are all these flakes? These little flakes? It's like he had dandruff and it was ashes falling out of the sky. And so we're really, really not that far away. And I was walking to the gym on Tuesday and I could see it and I sent pictures to my parents and was like, wow, this is a big bad wildfire in Santa Monica today. I thought it was Santa Monica because it looked so close. And I just had no idea. You have no idea what's about to unfold.

Sage (08:04):

Guess I've just been on the go for so long that I'm like, ah, fuck it. I haven't even been to my place since August really, except for a couple of weeks here and there. I mean, at this point I feel like my daughter and I are roommates. She literally called me for New Year's Eve and was like, do you want to come over? And I'm like, do I want to come over to the house that I pay rent at that I'm never at? Like what? And so I don't know, when they were like, you're evacuated and just pick up your shit and leave. And I was like, that bag's already packed. No problem. And I'm like, Emily, I'm coming back to Venice. And she's like, okay, here we go again. But we've had a lot of good downtime together to talk about our podcast, get some work done.

Emily (08:45):

Well, I mean.

Sage (08:45):

And try to focus.

Emily (08:46):

You have. I have not. I've been glued to the TV.  I would say this is one of the other weird things about this, everybody, is you can watch it happening live on TV.  Like Paris Hilton, this is going all over the internet, watched her house burn to the ground and is sobbing. It's just like, when does that, that is so bizarre to me. But it's also information. I will give, I think it's CBS local news, huge shout out because they have been on 24/7 and actually they're doing their jobs. They're giving us information and they're doing news as it's supposed to be. This is what news people are supposed to do is to be informing you and updating you and giving you proper warnings. And I've just been addicted to it almost. It's like you can't take your eyes off of it except for when our other neighbor here peeled me away and forced me to take my dog to the park for a short period, which was probably not smart because the air quality is so bad. And then today when we went on a little adventure, which was actually so therapeutic, we went to In-N-Out Burger and ate in the car in Westwood,

Sage (09:54):

Our emotions

Emily (09:54):

Next to UCLA, I had to eat my feelings.

Sage (09:56):

Our emotions got the best of us, yes.

Emily (09:58):

And what better way to do it than with In-N-Out.

Sage:

Absolutely. 

Emily:

Iconic LA, actually really good. You got to have that burger. We had milkshakes. I did learn a really fun fact about In-N-Out today, thanks to Sage's 14-year-old son who accompanied us on this little adventure over to Westwood. They have a Neapolitan milkshake. And for those of you I had to ask,

Sage (10:23):

Describe what that is.

Emily (10:24):

I had to ask.

Sage (10:25):

Yeah.

Emily (10:25):

Is the Neapolitan, because I know Neapolitan ice cream, we had it a lot in Ohio growing up. It's the chocolate, vanilla, strawberry all in one milkshake. And I missed out because I didn't know what to order because I was all flustered and I just said, whatever Sage is getting, I'll get that too. And we got chocolate, which was still delicious. But your son nailed it. And I had to ask if it was layered?

Sage (10:48):

Or if it's already mixed?

Emily:

Or if it’s swirled.

Emily (10:49):

I don't remember. 

Sage:

And we did not find out. 

Emily:

Did we not find out? 

Sage:

No, he wasn't sure. 

Emily:

Oh, and then we forgot to ask him because we were too happy eating our cheeseburgers.

Sage (10:58):

Eating our cheeseburgers and fries with shakes.

Emily (11:01):

I totally forgot. 

Sage:

Yes. 

Emily:

To follow up on if it's swirled or layered.

Sage (11:06):

What's funny is that our adventure to In-N-Out was actually due to the fact that my daughter had In-N-Out with her friends on her way to Carmel.

Emily (11:15):

And you were FaceTiming her and I was like, that is therapy right there.

Sage (11:20):

Right there. That's the answer.

Emily (11:21):

Everybody in LA needs to go get In-N-Out Burger stat with the animal sauce.

Sage (11:25):

There you go.

Emily (11:26):

And the Neapolitan shake

Sage (11:27):

And the caramelized onions. Oh, and animal style. Don't forget the special dressing.

Emily (11:31):

Special dressing. Just use the word animal if you go to In-N-Out.

Sage (11:36):

Animal everything.

Emily (11:36):

Animal everything.

Sage (11:37):

Yeah.

Emily (11:37):

Covered in animal. And I did feel better. I did feel a lot, lot better after driving around the city and being away from the television and doing something like sitting in the line at In-N-Out, which is normally such a pain in the ass. You're like, oh, this is going to take forever. Because the lines at the In-N-Outs in California, everybody, are just insane. They're so mobbed no matter which one you go to. But I was just so grateful to be like, and you were like, oh, let's just go inside. It'll be faster. And I was like, no, no. We are going to sit in the drive through line no matter how long it takes, and we have nowhere else to be. Might as well spend it at the In-N-Out.

Sage (12:16):

I mean eating away at your emotions, it helps. It's therapeutic for me anyways.

Emily (12:22):

And I haven't eaten in days. I haven't been able to. So in a way, I lost all my holiday pounds. I guess that's a silver lining. I probably shed all that weight I gained over the holidays. And so that In-N-Out Burger was probably the first thing I've eaten since Tuesday. Literally I haven't been able to eat.  It’s just…

Sage (12:39):

I've been eating more because yeah, it helps me cope.

Emily (12:41):

Yeah, you've been stress eating and I've been the opposite on the, what I like to call the “depot diet” because we had a friend that was going through a deposition and she couldn't eat because she was so stressed out. So that was me. I was on the Depot Diet this week.

Sage (12:57):

Totally. It's been pushing me away from my cigarette smoking. I'll say that.

Emily (13:01):

Oh, well that's a silver lining too. Look at that. I lose weight. You stopped smoking. Wins!

Sage (13:05):

Right.

Emily (13:05):

Wins. 

Sage:

Small wins.

Emily:

You got to have the small wins. We've also been hearing from these randos, this has been another one of my observations about the apocalypse is people come out of the woodwork, but then what's interesting is some people don't. So it's like who you hear from and who you don't hear from, I feel like is very telling.

Sage (13:26):

Sure.

Emily (13:27):

Because there's people I haven't talked to in years that are reaching out to me on Instagram. I've been posting a lot on Instagram just because it's easy. This is one of the things where social media is actually a very good thing, I think.  Because this week I've gotten so much information from social media.  I've been able to update all of my people in one kind of post that I am safe. This is what's happening. Rather than having to call individual people. It's really powerful and really positive. And normally social media is not, you know? And so I've had people being able to contact me through social media who I haven't, I mean, these were acquaintances that I have not heard from for years. And then some that someone that just came and visited me a few months ago, good friend, never ends up… all right, my little dog has something to say on this podcast, guys. It's just like Covid where you're like, oops, there's my dog. There's my cat.

Sage:

We’re at home.  Hunkering down. 

Emily:

That's my thing. So anyway, apparently when you're in the middle of the apocalypse, you hear from the people you don't want to hear from or it's very telling. And then the people that you don't hear from that you do expect to hear from. And I think that's just almost like sociopathic, you know?

Sage:

Yeah.

Emily (14:47):

So one of our ex friends who we will talk about in a future episode eventually when we discuss girlfriend breakups because those are almost as bad, actually they're probably worse than regular breakups. 

Sage:

Yeah, they can be.

Emily:

And then there's no like, hi, I am a human being. That used to be your bestie. It's like sociopath.

Sage (15:04):

Totally.

Emily (15:05):

Like, fuck you bitch.

Sage (15:06):

Yes, yes. Instead, you get these just like, well, actually, I've had a lot of sweetness about my Michigan girls and my Oregon friends.

Emily (15:15):

Well, of course, but you also had…

Sage (15:18):

I had this one. 

Emily:

Yeah, last night she gets…

Sage:

Yeah, rando text from, we've talked about this in other episode.

Emily (15:27):

Yes. If we all want to go back to this horrible double date that Sage dragged me on. I don't even remember what episode we talked about this.

Sage:

Oh, it was about the guy who…

Emily:

The cuffing season, I think. We were like, oh, how do you meet people? And I was like, oh, well, don't ever go on a double date with Sage. Because if you guys remember the guy with the tats all over him, the silver cap teeth.

Sage:

And he's like 6’4’, 6’5’

Emily:

And he had open heart surgery. Anyway, the Sage’s guy, not boyfriend, but whatever guy she dated who hooked that whole thing up, gives her a little text last night in the middle of Wildfire Mania. And he goes, can you please, what did he say? Can you give me a call when you have a free moment?

Sage (16:09):

Yeah. How are you doing? And oh, I just want to check on you. And I’m like….

Emily (16:13):

No. But the thing that pissed me off was like, can you give me a call when you have a free moment? And I'm like, okay, this is some dude we haven't talked to or even thought about in six months.

Sage (16:21):

Totally.

Emily (16:22):

You're - a free moment. Hello. LA is literally burning around you. It's like Pompeii or Ancient Rome, London's burning. And the guy's like, when you have a free moment, give me a call. And she's like, should I? Oh my God. And I was like, no. Fuck no. Why would…? Of all the people on the planet, why would you call that guy.

Sage (16:41):

No, you call to inquire what the fuck do you want after six months to ask me? 

Emily:

You were very curious. You were curious. 

Sage:

Yeah. To ask me in the midst of fires, how are you? Oh, do you really care? Shut the fuck up.

Emily (16:53):

No, it's worse than cuffing season. I think people are like, they're desperate now. They're like, oh my God, I could die. I could get swept away by fire. I need to have that person. And I'm lonely and I'm scared all by myself, so I'm going to go through my Rolodex and dig out…

Sage (17:06):

Whomever.

Emily (17:07):

Whomever. And you got the lucky call. 

Sage:

Sure.

Emily:

And so she does call him back against all of my warnings. I said, no.

Sage (17:17):

It lasts a full 3 to 5 minutes.

Emily (17:18):

I said, no. But he immediately picked a fight with you too, which I was like, oh my God, nothing changes. It's like, this is why you guys didn't ever keep a friendship or…

Sage (17:28):

There's nothing there.  Zero.

Emily (17:29):

Because immediately they start bickering right off the bat. I was like, what is this? I'm sorry. We have enough chaos going on right now, and now you're going to bicker at each other. Hang up the fucking phone.

Sage (17:40):

At this point, he's blocked. There's nothing there. There was no sincerity of how are you doing? It was just his annoying self.

Emily:

No. He was lonely.

Sage:

He was, and still is.

Emily (17:51):

He was scared and lonely and probably none of the other girls responded. But Sage is like, oh, hey, whatever. But yeah, I would say, so as you all know, I re-downloaded the apps. I don't know, this is a while ago now, and I've had nothing. I haven't been on them. No one's hit me up. In the last 36 hours, I've gotten so many likes. I'm like, what the hell? So apparently, people, when you're in the middle of an apocalypse, you go online dating? Is this just people are just extra bored or…

Sage (18:24):

No, I think it's, you find who really cares about you at this time and who doesn't. I mean to reach out to you and you haven't heard from them in six months or eight months, whatever it may be.

Emily (18:36):

These are complete strangers though. These are people that are looking at my photo and being like, hi, I want to talk to you. And I'm like right now?  

Sage:

Yeah, they must be really lonely.

Emily:

It’s just really inappropriate.

Sage (18:44):

Well, because the restaurants and bars are basically closed or they're closing early. So what other way to get a hookup?

Emily (18:50):

Can't go to the gym.

Sage (18:51):

Right? The gym's closing early by two.

Emily (18:54):

Yeah but who’s going to go through a wildfire to hook up with a rando online app guy?

Sage (18:58):

You have a friend, a guy friend.

Emily (18:59):

I do.

Sage (19:00):

That is so down to hookup

Emily:

Who shall remain nameless.

Sage:

Whether it's Christmas Day, New Year's Eve, there's a raging fire. 

Emily:

Wildfire apocalypse.

Sage:

Yes. You have a friend that's a man who is down as shit.

Emily (19:12):

I mean, come on Sage, penis first, wildfire second.  Come on.

Sage (19:15):

Ok.

Emily (19:16):

Property. Who cares? It's like you got to take care of the dick first.  My god.

Sage (19:19):

No, no. You got to take care of the vagina first, not the dick first.

Emily (19:23):

Not us. We've been going to bed at 7:00 PM.

Sage (19:26):

I know. We're lame as shit right now.

Emily (19:27):

Now, even though I have to say I have not really slept at all because - this is a pro tip, that there is an app called Watch Duty.

Sage (19:36):

It’s awesome.

Emily (19:37):

Which is phenomenal. But it causes me not to sleep because it gives you these little alerts. Well, right now it's all the time because there's fires all the time. And I'm paranoid that we have to evacuate Venice, but it's the same one that the firefighters use. So you're getting all this behind the scenes info. There's cameras that you can look at, and then they're requesting choppers. And I do have to say that if you are not in Los Angeles, you have to immediately go to the internet and check out some of these videos of the pilots nailing these fires with their drops. 

Sage:

They are so fucking hot. 

Emily:

They're so fucking rad. 

Sage:

They're heroes. 

Emily:

They're like going over Top Gun style

Sage (20:20):

Yes.

Emily (20:21):

And they drop this big water and it's just like, bam. And there's all these memes going around with music in the background and cheers in the background because we are enamored. It's kind of like a video game, which is sad and sick, because it’s all kind of like a movie, but it's amazing.

Sage (20:37):

It is Hollywood after all.  Right?

Emily (20:38):

Well, yeah. It's like we're showing up all the directors and producers over here. It's the real thing.

Sage (20:42):

Totally.

Emily (20:43):

But it's so heroic and it's so sexy that these people are just like, oh yeah, no problem. And you see either a helicopter or a little plane or even those big planes and just all of a sudden they just shoot and they score and you're like, ah,

Sage (20:58):

Yes, they drop water

Emily (21:00):

Like done.

Sage (21:00):

And if that fires out, and I'm like, he's so hot. That just turned me on. Oh my God. Between the helicopter guys and the firefighters.

Emily (21:10):

Sage is like, Sage is going nuts over here.

Sage (21:10):

My heart is beating so fast, not about my place burning down, but about these guys and all of their heroic efforts and I'm just like, show me more. Tell me more.

Emily (21:19):

We had to burst her bubble because she was all about going to give them food. And she was like, they just need a kiss and a cupcake. And I was like, bitch, you think they're just sitting around waiting for you to feed them lasagna? They're out there and then they're exhausted and they're dirty and red rimmed, and you have little Sage being like, here's my kiss and a cupcake. And I was like, you know that there's going to be some big sergeant dude that's like, leave it over there with all the others, or it'll be some woman that'll be like, oh my God, thank you so much.

Sage (21:47):

Exactly. My daughter was the one. 

Emily (21:51):

That's the reality check you needed.

Sage (21:51):

Yes. My daughter's also obsessed with firemen, and she was like, you need to go check on them, bring them some food and cookies. And I was like, why should I bother? They're not going to be there. They're all very busy right now. Or they're sleeping. And she's like, but it's just the right thing to do when they get back to the fire department.

Emily (22:10):

It was very sweet.

Sage (22:11):

It is.

Emily (22:12):

It was very sweet for her to think that.

Sage (22:13):

But I need eye candy. I'm not going to go there with bells and whistles in my hands and not get my eye candy.

Emily (22:19):

Well, but also, every restaurant in Los Angeles is giving all the firefighters free food. So you literally would be like, they'd be like, go to the back of the line, ma’am. What are you doing here?

Sage (22:29):

I'll be like, what time does your guys wake up after the midnight shift?

Emily (22:34):

My god. The poor things. But seriously, these people are so amazing. 

Sage:

They are. 

Emily:

And we cannot express enough of our gratitude or our respect. And it is amazing how beautiful they are. They were interviewing this one female firefighter. I was just, earlier today I turned.. 

Sage:

No, I know, not the female. That guy.

Emily:

No, but she was gorgeous. She was gorgeous!  I was like, why is everyone a firefighter just has to be gorgeous. It's part of their resume.

Sage:

I think so.

Emily:

That you have to look amazing.

Sage:

This guy,

Emily:

And then shoot this stuff out of your plane and it just nails these fires. It's very exciting.

Sage (23:07):

This firefighter was heading the town hall of the Pacific Palisades. 

Emily:

For the Palisades, yeah. 

Sage:

And he was to die for.

Emily (23:15):

He was, I agree, he was so cute.

Sage (23:16):

He was probably what? 26? 28?

Emily:

Not even. 

Sage:

Oh my God. And he was so smart. He was so spot on.

Emily (23:23):

He was your type. He actually was very, very smart and very knowledgeable.

Sage (23:26):

Yes.

Emily:

I liked that. 

Sage:

And he was so manly, and I was like,

Emily:

He has a little twang accent that she likes. 

Sage:

Emily was like, come watch him. And I'm smiling and grinning ear to ear.

Emily (23:35):

Yeah. She had this little look on her face.

Sage (23:37):

And then as soon as I see his ring and I was like, oh, he is married. Well, of course he would be.

Emily (23:43):

That's what I said to you.

Sage:

There’s all these good things about him. 

Emily:

I mean, I was like, how would a hot firefighter in the Pacific Palisades be single? Like, come on. If you are new listeners who just discovered us on Apple Podcast, again, welcome to the show. And we hope that today you were able to get a little glimpse of our lives here in Los Angeles no matter what is happening. But if you do want some more crazy stories and laugh along stuff, please do go back and refer to all of our episodes.  They’re all up there.

Sage (24:21):

Checkout season one, episodes one through 10.

Emily (24:25):

Yeah, we will be back next Tuesday, hopefully back in Santa Monica in our normal recording spot and with some more of that lighthearted laugh along stories. But in the meantime, we did want to say, if you have the means and the wherewithal, please, please, please help Los Angeles. GoFundMe has a list of verified organizations. They're accepting donations of all kinds. LA Times and LA Magazine have really good lists to refer to as well. We can also post some resources to our Instagram account, which you should check out anyway - it's @watchmedoitpodcast. And just remember, most people have nothing, so anything you give, toiletries, shoes, clothing, anything, your time, foster a pet. The shelters in Los Angeles we're 150% over capacity with homeless pets, and now there's so many more. So there's so much we can do in the days ahead and so much that we are going to do as we rebuild. And we're in this together. And again, we're just so grateful and thankful for those first responders. They're working around the clock, saving our city and our homes. And it's not just the LAFD, but people came from Arizona, Nevada, Utah, even Canada. 

Sage:

Oregon.

Emily:

The support is truly humbling and we just wanted to recognize you all and give you that shout out. And in the meantime, we will see you all next week. 

Sage:

Cheers.