Shabana's Inspiring Story: From India to Identity and Pickleball

In this episode of the Pickleball and Partnership podcast, host Charlotte Jukes converses with Shabana, who shares her deeply moving story of resilience and identity. Shabana recounts her journey from being found at a train station in India, being adopted, to discovering her roots and visiting her orphanage. The episode also reveals the incredible synchronicities Shabana experienced, including determining her chosen birthday with the help of newfound friends and human design. Shabana's story emphasizes the importance of choice, healing, and being present. The connection to pickleball as a fun and unifying activity adds a metaphor for life's playfulness and the importance of enjoying and connecting with others.

00:00 Welcome to the Pickleball and Partnership Podcast

00:41 Listener Shoutouts and Reviews

01:45 Introducing Today's Special Guest: Shabana

02:19 Shabana's Early Life and Adoption Story

05:47 Returning to India: A Journey of Rediscovery

06:35 Emotional Reunion at the Orphanage

15:04 A New Birthday: The Bloom Retreat Experience

18:04 Discovering Human Design and Embracing a New Identity

23:11 A Serendipitous Jewelry Purchase

24:19 The Significance of April 22nd

25:00 The Meaning Behind Shabana's Name

26:29 Embracing Morning Stillness

34:47 The Joy of Pickleball

38:17 Words of Wisdom and Connection

41:41 Podcast Conclusion and Next Steps

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Thanks to Purple Planet Music for Pickleball & Partnership Intro and Outro music Purple Planet Music is a collection of music written and performed by Chris Martyn and Geoff Harvey.

Transcript

 This the pickleball and partnership podcast, the place to talk. Talk about building better connections with your partner. Learning how to communicate with each other and how to inject fun. Into your relationship all through the game of pickleball. If that sounds like your cup of tea. Pull up a chair grab your paddle and join me. 
Your host, Charlotte Jukes. For pickleball and Partnership. 

Before we get properly stuck in today's episode, I just want to give a massive shout out to a few absolute legends who left reviews on Apple podcasts. First up, Catherine from Boston. You are an absolute star. Your lovely review had me smiling like I just won Wimbledon, or at least my local pickleball league.

Thank you so much. And Cindy and Vern from Calgary, I see you tuning in every single week. You are honestly part of the furniture at this point in the best way possible.  Thank you for being such brilliant supporters. I love that you're along for the ride.

If you haven't left a review yet and you're enjoying the show, it would mean the world. If you took a minute to do that, leave a review, take a screenshot, share it on Facebook or Instagram and tag me. Not only does it help others find the podcast, but I truly love hearing from you. And you might even get a shout out on a future episode. Alright, let's get into today's conversation. 

Today is such a special day on Pickleball and Partnership podcast because not only are we diving into a powerful story of resilience. Identity and connection, but it's also my guest's birthday and not just any birthday. This is the first one that she's celebrating on her chosen birth date.
Just let that sink in.  So after a life journey that began at a train station in India and eventually being adopted today marks a moment of full circle recognition, a moment of reclaiming identity, truth, and self. I honestly can't think of a more meaningful time to sit down and have this conversation.
So just before we dive into everything, let me just say Happy Birthday, Shabana.  Thank you.  I won't sing for you because my singing not that great. I'm so excited and I am so honoured that you are here today. On your very first podcast interview, so it's a first for so many different reasons, and it's your chosen birth date and you have chosen  to spend this hour with us, so thank you for that.

 Well, thank you so much for having me. That's such an honor. 

 We have so much to dive into, so much to unpack. I am so intrigued, and I know our listeners are curious. Oh my gosh, where do we start? Do we start with pickleball? Because obviously you play pickleball or you have played pickleball, so I want to hear about that. I also take us back to that train station in India, if you will. 

Yes, I will. Okay.   So story has it that my brother and I were found at a train station at a very young age.  I was two and he was four. And we look around and we are separated from our parents thankfully a police officer found us and could not locate any family so he put us in an orphanage and from that eventually we get adopted and we come to the United States and we got to stay in the same family. So that was amazing. And we grew up on the East Coast, 

Oh my gosh. Can I just,  take a moment there, because wow, that's a lot.

That's incredible.  Can I ask, do you remember that day? 

 I don't have any memory. it was just  what the police officer had gathered from the situation that he had told the orphanage, and that is our beginning story.  I remember like bits and pieces, like from the orphanage, but really, , I just turned 40,  it was so long ago.

 And I was the younger one at the time, so , I don't, , I take it as I. That is a story that was told and here we are, 

mm-hmm. Yeah. Wow. That's incredible.  Do you know how long you stayed at the orphanage?

Records show about like a year, year and a half. So that was like in 1986. Fall time. 'cause when we got to the orphanage, they just gave us birthdays 'cause we didn't know our birthdays. And then obviously they look at like our dental records and  our body and our shapes and stuff. And they kind of just said, Hey, this is how old you are, this is the year you're born, here's your birthday kind of thing.

So you just accept what adults say at that age and  on all like legal documents, my birthday is September 22nd,  1984. 

Do you recall being in the orphanage at all or was it after that time? 

Back in, I think it was like 2016, a movie came out called Lion and it was about a boy that was at a train station and got separated from his brother and then ends up finding his way to an orphanage  that's based on a true story. But basically when I saw that movie, it reminded me of my story   I feel like I've been so busy in my life. I've never taken the time to go back to India and like discover my roots. And then so that triggered all my thoughts back in 2016. And then just this past February I ended up going to India and going on like this amazing like tour.

And then at the end we saw the orphanage and we got to see  all of it and just sit there and be with.  The executive director there, and it was such a full circle moment of like, oh my gosh, I have been so loved and so held and so cared for for all these years.  And it was just so many tears for me for at the orphanage and stuff.

    When you saw the orphanage, when you went back to India earlier this year. And saw the orphanage  where you were taken to describe that for us. 

I like, I feel like I said, like no wor words there, even though I did talk a lot because they asked questions like, how is your upbringing?

 How is your family? What do you do? Like  the lady cared so much about me and I asked a lot of questions and it was just, it was so powerful. And amazing and just so many tears of joy and like gratitude and thankfulness that these people took the time to care for me and my brother and other people.

Obviously we weren't the only ones there.  In such like, horrible situations. And they took the time to love us and care for us. And a lot of the work they do  at this,  orphanage is they have a bunch of social workers and  they try so hard to reunite kids with their parents. And  they talked a lot about that when we were there.

 And then eventually you get qualified to go be adopted.  If  they don't get the results  I've always felt like I've been like protected, loved, cared for.  Our story could have gone a thousand other directions. , like I will never know the name of the guy  the police officer that found us.

But like, I'm so thankful and we grew up in an amazing household. Like our parents are so loving.  They gave us the world. They literally did. Just being at the orphanage, , it just brought everything together, that full circle moment of gratitude and love. 

That must,  not only have been incredible for you, but  like you say, incredible for the people that work there also, because they probably don't hear back from  too many children after they've been adopted.

 Yeah. Agreed. 

   Did you go to India with your family or was this a trip that you took on your own? 

No,    David and I have been married for almost 18 years, and we have three kids, and they're all school age,  sixth grade, eighth grade, and 10th grade. So realistically I was like, Hmm, no, I'm doing this by myself.

Also, my husband has like a lot of like food allergies and stuff, and so it just, it wouldn't work. So. Thankfully, one of my really good friends, Karen, she came with me and so we were roommates on this trip and then we had family friends that came with us, , Brenda and Rob, and they were amazing. So it was like the four of us.

And then the tour group itself was a total of like 10 people, including the tour guide.  But like at the end of the trip when the tour was over,  the four of us. Went from like New Delhi down to Pune, saw the orphanage and stuff, and then flew outta Mumbai and came home. I'm not like super good with logistics and stuff, but Brenda really just, she was amazing.

She figured out our hotel and our rides and everything so we could see the orphanage and do all the things. So like I just, I owe her so much to like make this a reality kind of thing. 

 It sounds as though you really were held through this journey as well through this time of going back to India, going back to the orphanage, so that you could absolutely 100% focus on you , because that must have been such an emotional trip for you.

Yes. It, it was, it was so amazing like.  Just to be there and like see all the people around you and they look like you and you're not like the odd person out   and then to think like, oh my gosh, my life could be completely different. India is such a beautiful place and culture and people, and.

Just everything. And I was like, all these little things would come up and I'd be like, oh my gosh. Like  one example is we went to, , a temple and we,  watched like the worship and stuff and I'm in there and I'm like, bawling  and then afterwards someone's like, Hey, are you okay? I'm like. That music I have heard before and it like touched my soul, like I was like, because I've never really heard it before, but I did.

Like I just knew, I knew that this was like so important to who I was and am. . I had so many moments like that in India where I would just would like look at something and it would like just be in my DNA and I'm like, holy crap.  It was amazing.  I, yeah. 

Wow, what an experience.  And I do remember that movie Lion coming out and oh my gosh, I remember crying.

It was such an emotional movie. So I can't even imagine what that was like for you to watch that  and know that your journey was quite similar to that. 

Yeah,  it was intense. It was really intense. And at that time,  my kids were younger ages, so it really like, oh my gosh, like I. I just wanna know more of who I am and where I come from, and that was a big part of sparking my trip back  to India and seeing everything, so.

  Yeah. And do you mind me asking about,  how you feel  about your birth parents. 

I have done a lot of work on myself, and honestly, that's how I feel like I, I am the way that I am because I've done , a lot of inner work healing, and I know there's always more to do.

 I just, obviously, I don't know them. I've never like have found them or anything like that, but like I love them so much and I know that they were just dealt a really crappy hand. It is what it is and I forgive them.  My life turned out amazing. So  I got a great deal.

I got a great deal out of the deal. But , I know if they're out there, I. I have like this sense that my mom is still out there. I'm not sure about my dad, but I know that like my mom is still out there and I know like sometimes I'll just  close my eyes and  connect with her and send her love.

 I have a sense of peace. I think whatever happened, I don't think she was aware of it. I think it was something like somebody, whether it was. A father figure or an uncle or something. I think it was one of those,  it just happened and then she was just like, wait, what? Like, I, that's how I choose to interpret the story.

, but nope, I'm not angry. I'm not mad.  People make poor choices when they're in hard situations and I know I come from complete poverty. I think of like dirt floors and huts and like dogs running around. I think of  just like the worst of the worst.  But we all have to start somewhere and  it's all a choice.

So , I choose to believe that.  I love them. 

 And you've been given,  really, truly, they gave you such a gift. You mentioned that, and you bring up a,  a different perspective, an intriguing angle that actually your parents may not have been aware of.  The situation, it may have been out of their control.

 But it's interesting you have a sense of what happened and that you feel that connection to your mom.  I can relate to that. From my perspective, because my mom passed a long, long time ago, but I still feel that connection. And I think, , I feel like as women, we do have that connection with   our birth mom, who, whoever gave birth to us, whatever the situation, whatever the circumstances, I mean, she gave us life, 

 yeah, that's beautiful what you said. . Thank you.  Yeah.  So Shabana, I met you actually just a few weeks ago and got to hear little bits of your amazing story and  I was so attracted to your energy.   You just exude  this energetic, this light. You really light up a room and you really shine.

 When we met, we were actually at, Cathy Heller Bloom retreat and .  Something quite extraordinary happened to you while we were at the retreat. Do you want to share that? Yes, of 

course.

Okay.  As we started this podcast, we're talking about how today is my chosen birthday.  Today is April 22nd.  And during the retreat  on the first day we were there, we were on the second exercise that we did, it was called,  I see the Mystic in you and 

, Cathy, had given us like 10 different things to say and we were supposed to find a partner, look into their eyes and say what was on the paper? And I just felt in my spirit, I was like, I'm gonna ask Cathy, why not? And so me being me, I like in my head, I was like, she's gonna reject me and say no, and that's okay.

But the point is that I tried. So she's like, okay, go ahead find a partner and I want you to find a partner that you have not worked with before. So then I was like, I'm gonna ask Cathy. So I get up and I walk over to the stage where she's sitting and I was like, Hey, do you wanna do this exercise with me?

And she is like, no, I think you should find somebody else. And I said, okay, well if you change your mind, I'm here. And she's like, okay, f it just come up on the stage. So I was like, okay, so you sit down. And I was like, nervous of course. And like, she's like my celebrity crush or whatever. But,  she's like, okay, I'll go first.

So she went first , and then I went and  she's like, you don't have to look at your paper like f the notes. Just speak from your heart. And I just spoke what was on my heart and what I saw in her. , and we're like, we're both crying and stuff.

And then at the end her first question is, when is your birthday? And I'm like, uh, uh. I was like, it's kind of a long story. Okay. I'll tell you. I was like, my birthday is September 22nd. It's the birthday I was given at the orphanage. And,  then I ended up telling her just real quick, left under train station was found by a police officer, put in an orphanage, get adopted, grow up on the east coast kind of thing.

Now I live in Washington. I'm married and I have three kids kind of thing. So,  I got to share that story with her and then at the end of that conversation, she basically said, um, it would be so neat if you found an oracle and they could just tell you like when your birthday is. So I was like, oh, maybe, maybe that will happen.

 I'm open to possibilities at all times. , so the next day,  Alexandria Cole came in and talked about human design. And so of course I'm like, okay. So I asked her, I'm like, I don't have a birthday, so what do I do?  And she's like, just listen to the different groups. And decide which group like resonates the most with you.

 So I'm like sitting at the table by myself in this crowded room of all these empty tables and everybody's like popping and  going into  the four different categories that we had, um, shown for human design. , and then eventually I was drawn to one group. But then when we were doing the descriptions and learning more about human design, I resonated more with the manifesting generators.

I.  So I felt during that time I had received what my, new birthday was, or my chosen birthday, and I just kept it in my heart. I didn't wanna tell anyone.  And then that evening when we were done, one of the other ladies that I didn't know, I. Uh, very well was like, Hey, do you wanna like go out to dinner just like you and me?

Something like low key. I was like, yeah, that sounds amazing. I was like, but I have to invite my roommate. So it was the three of us and the three of us just chat from like 6:00 PM to like 1130 and towards the end  the three of us had gone back up to her room 'cause , the restaurant was closing.

 So we, , went to her room and, , she pulled cards for us, so she was pulling us cards and stuff and then I'm like, wait, are you in Oracle? And then she's like, yes. I'm like, okay, tell me my birthday. And she's like, I think you already know. I was like, okay, but I wanna hear someone else say it because I still hadn't told anybody 

the date I had decided. And so she says April 22nd, I'm like, oh my gosh. She has April 22nd. And then,  my other friend that was in the room, Natalie, she's like, that's what I was thinking too, but I didn't wanna say it. And so we just decided together that. April 22nd would be my chosen birthday. And how fun is that?

 I get to celebrate two times. I should be celebrating all year long, but 9 22 and 4 22 are the days I'm recognizing, for my chosen birthday. 

 The synchronicities are just unbelievable, aren't they?   We honestly have no idea.

And if anybody has listened to my episode from a couple of weeks ago, I actually referenced the Bloom retreat there and Human Design and Alexandra Cole and what came up for me during that time as well. But we honestly just have no idea what. In store for us. And I just, I love this. I think,  the universe is just so playful  and just reveals so much to us if we are open.

But the fact that you were on this retreat and  you met up with this lady, an Oracle who gave you your birth date, but you say this was a date that you had in your mind anyway. Tell us about that. 

The only reason I had that in my mind is because when we were doing human design work, it's just something that was like, oh wait, I could have a new birthday.

Like it was just one of those things. So it popped into my head and then, , the cool part is that after I had put in like my September 22nd birthday in human design,  the answer wasn't like, resonating with me. And then I put in the new birthday and I realized that the year is off. So it would be April 22nd, 1985.

And when I put those dates in, it gave me a six one. Which in human design, it's a number thing, and then it also gave me manifesting generator. So I got my numbers and my like title thing. I putting in my new birthday, and so I was like, I'm keeping it. It's mine. This is mine.  

That is incredible.

Yes, and I'm a manifesting generator too. Totally. And I know. Yes.  It was. So interesting, and I think I mentioned this before on the past episode, but I thought that was such an amazing exercise to do because we are split up into those four different groups and I literally made my way to my group.

And then looked around at the people in my group and I was like, of course you're in my group. Of course it was my friend, you know, Kate was there and Lex was there, and you know, it was just everybody that I had connected with on a deeper level, and you just got this real sense of, yes, these are my people.

Yeah. So that's incredible that you felt that too, that. Yeah, that September the 22nd was not quite jiving with you. Mm-hmm. You put the new date in, which gave you a new year as well, and that just felt so much more aligned for you. . Gives me chills, honestly. Wow. 

 And  the next like, crazy thing with all of this is, um, back when we were, when I was in India back in February, March,  we went to a fancy jewelry store and I was like, I'm not gonna buy anything.

Like, I don't need to spend more money on stuff. Um, but then I decided that I was gonna get a ring  our tour guide, was able to like talk down the price and I was like, all right, fine, I'm gonna do it. So I splurged and I bought a ring and this ring is gorgeous. That's besides the point, but it is.

I 

can contest to that because I 

can see it. 

It's 

so pretty. I love it. Anyway, so it's a circle. So  like that full circle moment. But after I've made a decision on the birthday part, there's 22 diamonds on the outside. And April's birth stone is diamonds. So it basically is saying April 22nd, but in, in stone form.

Um, and the middle part, one of December's birth stones is a blue topaz, and that's what's in the middle of this ring. And David and I were married on December 1st, and there's one of them in the middle. So it's just like. Mind blowing. The other thing great about April 22nd, which I didn't realize until afterwards, is that, April 22nd is Earth Day and like, hello.

  It makes me so happy. I love spring. I love taking my walks and getting back in shape in the springtime, like I live in Washington state, so it rains a ton, but soon as spring hits. It's gorgeous here and the weather's warming up, so I'm like, yep, I'm celebrating this. This is a good day.

 We are celebrating Shabana's 40th chosen birthday today and Earth Day. . And your first podcast interview. Wow. The energy is just incredible here. .   

 I'm just curious, is shabana your birth name or was that given to you later on?  Have you ever looked up your name?  I love the meaning of names.

There's so much around them 

I'm such a name person. 

 That's a great question.  It is my birth name and I love that. So when we were at the orphanage, one of the questions I had asked. , so is Shabana likE my name? Or did you guys gimme that name?

And they're like, Nope.  You came here , and you were proud and you were just like, Shabana shabana, like you knew your name.   And we wrote it down.  So yes, that is my birth name given I assumed by my mom. 

That's so special that,  your parents gave you that name  yes. That's incredible. Okay, so I just had this image of you at the age of two pointing to yourself and Shabana, Shabana, you were just so proud. 



  15 years ago, a lady at church like Googled my name and  she put my name as,  Queen of Virtues.  So there's that. And then just last night I was looking it up because realizing after being in India, I don't know why I didn't.

It took so long to correlate it, but my name is a Muslim name, so Shabana in Muslim means like Lady of the Night.  And then my last name is Knight.  And I, I think  the crazy part, even  I think it's a Bible verse, but it says like, the light shines brightest in the darkness.

 And just like recently I'm learning more of like  just taking time for myself and that's when we get filled up so we can pour out. Like I've always known this and there's been different seasons of ebbs and flows and stuff, but really spending  those first hour just in stillness. That's, that's where all  the ideas and everything manifest is when we take the time to slow down and from that become love and light wherever we go to the people we're around.

 I do a lot of volunteer work at my kids' schools and stuff like that, and there is always some kid  to love on and just like, Hey, how's it going?  They're amazing people.

But anyway, I get to share that love and light through that, and then I. Also do like cleaning and organizing and  it just brings peace and light to people's houses. Like I really feel like sometimes I'm just like cleaning the dirt away and then people come home and they're like, oh, thank you so much.

This is amazing. , just a little bit more about me. 

 I can totally see that.  You just shine your light everywhere you go. And  I already said it. Your energy is amazing and,  thank you.  I also love that first hour or so of the morning before the house has come alive, before everyone else is doing their thing.

 My. husband is still lying there snoring next to me. Yeah. And I know Cathy Heller, she also talks about this,  that sacred hour, and I take that time every morning. To really connect to myself and to connect to the divine, the universe, to connect to that energy.  I love it. It's a really nourishing time for me to be able to,  connect with myself, but I also love the analogy of thinking of myself as a candle because when a candle lights other candles, the original candle does not diminish in any way. Yes. And I think,  as a nurse for 37 years mm-hmm. I've. Felt as though giving to other people took a little bit of me.

But in actual fact,  when we are really nourishing ourselves and we are really connecting to who we are, and that's why I love that sacred time every morning.  The energy,  is infinite.  We have so much to give and I really see that in you. I know  we are over Zoom. I know we are not in the same, place, but I really feel like we are, your energy is really so giving and I bet the kids just love you to pieces.



 They do. It's so fun. 

Yes. , I'm curious because you touched on this a little bit. Mm-hmm. And I think,  people, maybe your story is really resonating with them.  And you mentioned that you have done a lot of work on yourself. What helped you heal, or,  not that you were broken, but what helped you really create that strong sense of self? 

 Honestly, I think it just, it comes back to being placed in such a loving household. Like my adopted parents are amazing.

They, like I said, they gave us the world. They didn't spoil us, but they taught us and they loved us, and they accept us exactly who we were, and they've always been so supportive with. Anything and everything. And I mean, I really feel like , it was the environment, that shaped us to be who we are today.

 And I also think I don't know where I get it from, but I've always been that like, happy go lucky.  My cup is overflowing type of person. And granted, I've had my dark seasons, we've had hard times in our marriage and  we've had so much. But , I just choose that everything is gonna work out and  I just trust, I trust myself.

I trust the universe. I trust God,  that no matter what it's gonna be okay. And I've always had that and I always. Just  choose to see the light in any situation. hope that 

answers your question,  yeah, absolutely it does. I think, you know, I think that trust is huge.

  I love that you said,  cup overflowing because I think when we can really see those moments in our life, and there are so many of them,  even from the fact that I woke up this morning and I woke up in my bed, which is Yes, comfortable, and  I woke up warm and I woke up next to somebody who I love dearly, who dearly loves me, you know?

Yeah. All around us. And I think when you can really tap into that, that you have no choice but to see what's just amazing and what the universe provides for us , on a constant basis. 

 Absolutely.  I think it always just comes down to like just choice. Like knowing that we get to choose, like I am an adult.

I can choose to celebrate any day I want to for my birthday, or I can choose. To wake up and spend time alone and get my cup filled. Or I can, like, I've had moments where I've been like angry and I've dealt with anxiety and depression and stress, like, hello, that's just life sometimes. But, um, what really helps me is just having my, like, my quiet time and also like getting out in nature and taking walks and  listening to amazing podcasts.

 I'm just like, okay, I'm out of alignment. How do I get back into alignment? This is what I need to do and it works for me kind of thing.   I just started again, waking up early and spending time alone. It's only been like a week.  Prior to this I would always have like bad dreams and nightmares and I'd just like wake up and be anxious and be running out the door and I'm like, my life is crazy.

What am I doing with myself kind of thing. Just lots of disorganization.  But then I just decided, I was like, the people that are successful,  like Mel Robbins and Cathy Heller and all these amazing people, I. They choose to find time in their day to get still and get quiet, get the download and take action.

And I was like, I can take lots of actions and sometimes I get downloads, but I need to get still and the only time I can get still is first thing in the morning at like 5:00 AM Um, so I just told myself like, body, if you want to spend time with me, you have to wake me up. I am not gonna set an alarm.

And so the first day I wake up at like four 40, and the next day it's like four 30. The next day it's like 4 45. And I'm like, okay, I'm doing this. And then it was actually just on Sunday. We stayed up late Saturday night and then Sunday was Easter and I was like, oh, I really hope my body like lets me sleep in.

Nope. It woke me up at like four 50 and I'm like, Ugh. And then I was like, then I had like fear of like missing out, so I was like, I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna spend time with myself and it's gonna be a great day. And it was, so if my body decides not to wake me up, then I'm just gonna be like, okay, then I'll just wake up later.

You know?  For the past seven, eight days, it's waking me up and  I'm doing the thing and I'm just so happy. It's just like I have so much more energy and  I have no more bad dreams and I have less anxiety, and it's just like, oh,  this is what works.  

What an empowering practice You've inspired me.  And I love that you said to your body, okay.

 Make this happen and it's happening for you and here you are now having that quiet space. You've inspired me  to get up when I wake up at four, whatever it is in the morning.  There's a message for me to actually Yes. Get up at that time. I love that  before we go, we have to touch on pickleball, and I know I could talk to you, oh my gosh.

Shabana all day. But you have birthday celebrations to go to. I know you have so much more to do than talk to us on your birthday, but just briefly, how did you. Pickleball, what drew you to the sport? Tell us that story. 

Oh, I love it. So it was like Christmas 2022. Um, grandma had given our family,  a set of pickleball and like the net and the balls and everything.

 But I had heard about pickleball, so I'm definitely more recent to the game. And I remember just  the five of us going to the court and just playing and stuff and just how like fun and free it was. And it just reminds me of just that metaphor of life.  Life is a game and you're meant to have fun and you're meant to enjoy it, and it doesn't have to be stressful and rigor and who's winning and who's doing this.

It's like just enjoying being more present and being off of our phones and connecting with the people around us and. It's a great sport. I didn't, I just learned this last night. It's a combination of tennis, badminton and I think like ping pong or something. I grew up playing  those things like with our family and stuff.

So it only makes sense that, of course I like pickleball. Duh. So yes, it is really, really great. And I have one other thing to share if that's okay. Of course. Okay.  So last week the kids decided that they wanted to do Easter baskets and do an egg hunt. And I'm like, okay, great. Now I have to figure this out.

'cause originally it was like, okay, here's 20 bucks, here's some candy.  So I went shopping on Friday and got everything, but I was like, oh, I'm gonna buy myself a birthday shirt. So I bought this shirt.  For those who can't see it, it's like light blue and it has these beautiful,  pink flowers on it.

It is gorgeous. Can I? 



Thank you. And then,  I didn't like take the tags off. I just like, kind of like put it in my closet and then I grabbed it. So I pull it out the other day to take the tags off to try it on and make sure I liked my outfit for today. And on the tag, , there's a lion. 



Yes. 

And so I find it interesting that the shirt I pick out the tag is Lion and it's from the Movie Lion. Yes, that my new birthday shirt already has a symbol.  Of just my life. 

Oh my gosh. Chills again. Wow. The signs are all there. If we are just open to it, honestly, all we have to do, like Cathy says, is follow the breadcrumbs, right?

Yes, yes, yes. Exactly. 

 That's incredible.  You have shared so much. , it was just, oh, like I say, you have to come back on again because I feel like we have more to talk about.   📍 More pickleball to talk about. I love that you play with your children. I keep saying this, pickleball is for everyone.

Absolutely. If there's anybody listening who's like, well, shall I play, or shan't I don't know if the children, the kids would like it. Just go try it. It is so much fun and I love that you said life is, it should be about play. It should be about fun. I don't think we do enough of it. Just leave us Shabana, if you will, with some words of wisdom.

If  there is somebody out there who's listening, who perhaps really resonates with your story in some way. They're going through some kind of journey themselves of maybe disconnection or unknown identity,  what would you say to them? 

 I would say lots of things, but  I think it comes down to, I'll read this and see what resonates, but it says,  just know that you are amazing.

You've got this, you heal people with your words. Yes, it's a powerful story, but you never are stuck in your story. You always have choice. And I think it comes down to like, regardless of what life has been given to you, you always have a choice to rise above. You don't need to stay stuck in your story. I mean, for years I did stay stuck in my story of being like abandoned, left alone, unwanted, like all the things.

And sometimes I get triggered and I fall back. But it's a choice to get up and move forward and say, I. No, that happened and this is how I'm moving forward and this is how I can show somebody love. I've always been a person that if I see, if we're in a group of people and there's somebody like standing by themselves or they look like, oh, I don't belong, I always go up to them and say, Hey, do you wanna sit with us?

Hey, I have an extra seat. 'cause I don't want people to feel alone and. It breaks my heart when I see people and kids alone.  And 'cause I have felt alone a lot of my life.  But at the same time, because I know the feeling, I can relate to people and, and bring them in and connect them.

I love connecting people.  And then also find time during your day, even if it's five minutes, just to be alone so you can feel good.  We weren't meant here to be on this earth just to feel like crap all the time. Like as mothers and wives and humans all together, like all the things like spend time alone and go play pickleball and have fun.

   On, last week's episode, I think it was , I interviewed, , the head coach of a new pickleball facility here  in Calgary, which was amazing. And he said,  loneliness is huge. I think there are so many people out there who do feel lonely and they feel like they are alone.

And Sumit said. I have never had so many friends. And it's true. You go and play pickleball. Yes. You're having fun. You are not sitting on the couch feeling sorry for yourself. You are active and you're connecting with people. So yeah. What more is there shaban? Exactly. So, so much. You are an amazing person. You have so many amazing stories. , 

I feel so honored to have shared part of your chosen birthday with you. It's an honor to have met you and I would love to,  extend the invitation. Please do come back on the podcast at some point. I would love, love to chat with you some more. 

 Awesome. Let me know when you have a spot.

I'll be there. Thank you so much. 

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