Welcome to Chapter Blue!

In this first episode of Chapter Blue, host, Tyra Valeriano, introduces listeners to her vision for the podcast and shares her personal journey from law enforcement to becoming a mental health and wellness coach for first responders. Tyra candidly discusses the challenges and triumphs of balancing life as a parent and police officer, her reasons for stepping away from active duty, and the importance of setting boundaries to achieve work-life balance. This episode sets the tone for future discussions, offering insights for current, aspiring, and retired law enforcement professionals for all around the world. Listeners are invited to join Tyra as she continues to discuss the raw realities and pivotal moments that define life behind the badge.

Chapters

• 0:39 Who am I, and why this podcast?
• 2:41 Am I Really Retired?
• 4:03 What to Expect from Chapter Blue Podcast
• 6:08 How to be a Guest
• 6:37 What do I do Now?
• 8:18 Can you be Successful in LE and as a parent?
• 15:25 Where did I leave off in LE?
• 16:50 What does Chapter Blue mean?
• 18:10 Instagram handles and links to be a guest

Transcript

Welcome to chapter blue the podcast where we discuss the world of law enforcement through an honest conversation on tough or controversial topic real stories perspectives and experience from officers all around the world whether you're here for insights on Mental Health self-care work-life balance getting into law enforcement getting out of law enforcement or just trying to learn about personal and professional challenges officer space every day you've come to the right place I'm your host Tyra valeriano and whether I'm going solo or speaking with a guest each episode will discuss different aspects of Life Behind the badge let's turn the page and step into chapter blue.

I am Tyra Valeriano and thank you for joining me for my first episode of my long anticipated and overdue podcast that I have been talking about for well over a year I'm excited to now finally be starting something that has been in the works for quite a while I have a lot of really good guests lined up for future episodes and if you don't already know me I am a former law enforcement officer of 11 years I started my law enforcement career in 2011 where I was a correctional officer for a prison in Sierra Blanca and in 2012 almost a year later I took a job with a law enforcement agency in New Mexico and I served my career in New Mexico until 2022 where I took an early retirement and moved abroad with my family and now I am a law enforcement coach for mental health and wellness and am currently creating a course for mental health and wellness to help agencies develop a wellness program for their First Responders that will benefit them in their home and work life. I'm very much involved in law enforcement till this day I don't think that I will ever be able to escape law enforcement completely but during my time out of law enforcement I have really learned a lot about myself and I've learned a lot about what we need to work on and change in the field and this is kind of where I landed so here we are with our first podcast I do not have a guest today I wanted to use my first episode to allow my listeners to get to know me a little better to know what the podcast is going to be about and what to expect in future episodes and I do have a couple topics that I want to address if you follow me on social media you might have an idea of what those topics are but nonetheless let's get started.

So I get a lot of heat for saying I retired in 2022 and it's something that I've actually wanted to talk about because in a way it kind of irritates me because I don't know it just irritates me and now that I've been out of law enforcement for almost two and a half years it doesn't bother me so much but I do want to tell you that I I call it a retirement because I did pull my retirement out and most people will say well she had to pay taxes and a penalty on her retirement meaning that it's not a real retirement but I actually didn't have to pay any of those things and I was able to actually retire with my retirement money so I do like to call it an early retirement I did not serve 20-25 plus years so I definitely would never take away from those of you who retired at your term or longer in fact thank you for your service to your communities because it is a tough job.

At the end of the day that was what I did and I have a great life and I'm happy with the decision that I made if I were to ever go back to law enforcement I would rather say that I don't want to go back if I don't have to but if I had to I would so that's where I sat on that. For the podcast I have a lot of Visions about topics to discuss. But ultimately this is just really for law enforcement to let loose you know this is just a conversation we have all done the job if you are looking to join law enforcement this is a really good place to come and listen to stories experiences. Maybe even get some helpful advice if you just decide that this is what you want to do for your career and for those of you who are in law enforcement maybe you might hear something that appeals to you that might help you in your career or your home life and really I just wanted to be fun and allow officers to be themselves.

As a former police officer I know that there are certain things that we can't talk about I was really pensive about being on a podcast on the left starting my own podcast because you have this fear that's kind of instilled in you about what you can and cannot save because it can be used against you in court right so there's just a lot of things that I had to conquer before starting my own podcast and feeling comfortable talking about anything law enforcement. I have been on a couple of podcasts in the past after I left law enforcement and there were a couple things that I said that I thought that I was ready to talk about and when I went back and listened to it I I realized I wasn't ready to talk on a podcast I just it didn't come out the way I wanted it to it sounded way different than what I had imagined it sound in my head and I took a long break from doing any podcasts in fact I just most recently did a podcast I want to say in August I did a podcast and it took almost two years for me to decide to do another one and I just recently did one a couple weeks ago so I am feeling a lot more comfortable talking about law enforcement my experience is and I'm hoping that I can do the same for other law enforcement officers out there.

Whether you're retired you decided to take on another career you're currently in law enforcement or you plan to join law enforcement I would love to have you as a guest so if you follow me on social media I do have a link in my bio where you can sign up I have a calendar there if some of those hours don't work for you let me know we can work something out but as of right now those are the hours that I have available because I do have clients for law enforcement coaching which is another thing that I want to talk about so now that I am out of law enforcement
I started a business for law enforcement coaching and when I first started it I was very out of my comfort zone and I knew that people that I worked with were probably going to be talking shit making fun because that's what they do and they did heard it I saw it I got the responses on my website and in all honesty I don't know how it really made me feel I know I felt a little bit upset and let down because I wanted support from the people that I thought I had friendships with but at the end of the day I don't need validation from anybody and I decided to move forward with that business and I am currently still law enforcement coach I do feel that it is very helpful to law enforcement with his cliche and taboo is it sounds I probably wouldn't have done it in my career if it was barely coming out because I had that mentality that I don't need that that's dumb that doesn't even sound like it's worth it or whatever you know I had that same mentality. 

But now that I'm from the outside in it's it's very helpful and the clients that I have helped throughout this journey it's it's been pretty cool it's and not to not to say that it's worked for everyone but for about 90% of my clients I have seen a huge turnaround in their personal and professional life so I am definitely happy with the choices that I have made as far as what I've decided to do with my career and experience and how it can help others in law enforcement.

One of the topics that I really wanted to talk about today that I mentioned in my social media is I get asked a lot if it's possible to be a parent and a police officer and be successful in both and I get this more obviously from women who are wanting to join law enforcement but I've gotten a handful of these messages also from men and it does apply to both because obviously mom dad you're you know you both can be police officers and we played different roles at home so it does have its challenges but I really wanted to touch on this topic because
and there's a realistic version and there is an image version and the image that I have put out there while I was in law enforcement is yes it's possible you know yeah girl join law enforcement you know you can be a mom and a cop at the same time and you can but there are things that you need to have in line to make sure that you can be successful in your career and your home life especially if you have little ones at home you have to have a support system if you do not have a support system it is going to be very very challenging to maintain your career and your home life by yourself. 

If you have little kids that cannot take care of themselves and you do not have a support system the truth is is that law enforcement isn't for you because it is going to be very very difficult to work around your children and the crazy schedule that you will have in law enforcement it's going to be very difficult to do now I was looking up to work at an agency that valued family and I don't mean that they value family in the sense of I was able to go to all birthday parties and you know shows and you know events that my kids were in no that's not what I mean but what I mean is that if my kid was sick and I was at work and I had a tall my supervisor hey I got to go my kid is sick I gotta take him to the doctor there was really no and there was no pressure to say Hey you gonna have to find somebody else to do that I mean they worked with me they worked with a lot of the officers that worked there and I for that I'm actually very lucky because not every agency is like that so if you work at a smaller agency I feel like it's it's probably more likely that you will have that support from your agency.

But I mean I know more agencies do not do that I was very fortunate to have an agency that did that so back to the question is yes you can be successful in both but without that support even from your agency it's very difficult to do and I join law enforcement as a single mom I had recently gotten divorced and it is actually what prompted me to become a police officer and I wanted to be a role model for my kids I wanted to make enough money to support me and my kids and make a life for us and my intentions were 100% well thought out and they were with a good heart but I will say a huge Factor was the financial aspect I was getting paid pennies as a correctional officer and I wanted to do something that was going to be more respectable and better for me and my kids but you know this is something that nobody really talks about and when I get asked this question I don't know how to answer without sounding negative but I want to be honest and if I would have known what I know now I think that maybe I would have approached going into law enforcement slightly different than what it what I did
 I don't regret anything obviously because my life everything that I went through in my life has led me to where I'm at now.

You know I wouldn't have had the help that I needed on the crazy schedule that I had you know I was working days and nights 12-13 hour shifts. you are going to get called in for everything and on top of that if there is over time that nobody wants we'll gets what it's gonna be yours you're the new officer you need the experience and you really just lose a lot of time with your kids so even if you have the support at home to be able to do the job you have to decide where you're going to set your boundaries and you know if you work for an agency that's not willing to work with that then you may not be able to do this career I lost a lot of time with my two older kids and you know this is where the brutally honest side of law enforcement is for you has to be a decision that you make because at the end of the day the realistic side is that you are going to miss out on your children's lives.

you're going to miss out on a lot of time with them you are going to miss out on the birthdays the special events you know the Christmas parties whatever you are going to miss out on those things you're going to be working night shift and get home in the morning and just be completely drained ready to go to bed and sleep your day away while your kid is either home or at school gets home from school and they want to spend time with you you know there's gonna be a lot of times where you just have no patience to want to deal with your family or the questions or the laundry or the things that need to be done at home because you are just burnt out.

so to answer the question that I get so often is it possible to be successful
 in law enforcement as a parent or to be successful in your home and work life yes but you have to consider the challenges you have to be prepared and this is why I decided to start this podcast is because I would want officers to know what I didn't know when I joined right for their future for their families for whatever interests they have for their career and to have the opportunity to work on the things that they can to make it the best possible life that they can without losing their family without losing the connection to their kids.

I would want them to have an advantage to set the road professionally and successfully set boundaries but if you go in and you are set on how you want your life and you stick to that I am pretty sure that you are going to have a successful home life and a successful career I did end my career as a patrol Sergeant which I do think is the best position to have in law enforcement I'm sure there's some people out there who disagree with me but I think it's the best position to have and it's I don't know if I ever had to go back to law enforcement I think I would work towards being a patrol sergeant again but with that being said I think that it is a really great position to be in when it comes to your ability to set boundaries because not only are you going to set boundaries for yourself but you're going to be an example for your shift or you know the people that work underneath you on how you want them to be in their life.

so if you want that for your life then you're gonna want that for the life of you of the people that are working for you and sometimes that means going up against the grain you know you're gonna have a supervisors that are not okay with what you're doing or they don't agree with the decisions that you're making and you're gonna have to go up against that you're going to lose some of your battles you may lose them all you may lose a shit ton more than you will win but at the end of the day if you go in fighting for what you feel is right for the morale and the benefit of your shift and officers the people who are on the front lines and they're out there doing this job then with that being said it's just a little bit of the many discussions I plan on us having during the chapter blue podcast.

The reason why I chose this name is obviously because there is a chapter in my life that is dedicated to Blue and that is being in law enforcement I have so much to share with you guys I have a lot of perspective that I've gained since being out of law enforcement and there's a lot of things that I feel are relative to Law Enforcement Officers today that I would really like to share with you guys so that you can work on it and have a good retirement and to not suffer to be able to get out of law enforcement and not feel the need to want to go back because there's nothing else to do or if you decide that you know hey I want to get out of this career but there's nothing else I can do I want you to be aware of the things that you're going to go through and what you're going to experience getting out of
 by all means you're in the right you're in the right place so law enforcement and the Temptation you're going to have to want to go back it's it's crazy but
you know I'm excited to share these things with you and I appreciate you guys listening to me for my first episode.

I know it's not much but I just want to give you a little bit of insight of what it is that I want for this podcast if you are interested in being a guest I did mention that you can find a link on my bio on my Instagram and you can sign up there with the calendar that is provided if you do not follow me on social media my Instagram is T dot val underscore official so T dot v a l underscore official I hope you guys are going to join me for my second episode if you have any feedback any suggestions or anything you'd like to hear talked about by all means I'm open to everything and anything and I look forward to seeing you in episode 2 you guys have a good day.

thank you for joining me on chapter blue if you enjoyed today's episode be sure to follow and tag me on social media and share with your friends and fellow officers if you're interested in joining an episode I'd love for you to be a part of the conversation until next time stay safe take care of yourself and remember you're never alone this journey