Decoding Yourself

With my years of learning and growing personally and professionally I figured out why I struggled with implementing it. 

I love learning, I just didn't realize I learn a different way then how it is presented. I needed more time to fully absorb it and implement it they way that they did it themselves. 

It wasn't until I understood personality styles that I understood how I think and process new information. Last year when I created my podcast Decoding your Clients that I put into detail the Personality Code. This has been my decoder ring of myself and others. It all starts with knowing myself and how to relate to others.

Then I realized it is the foundation, or should be the foundation on how we learn and grow personally. I struggled so long because I thought I needed to recreate myself into that image. I really needed to know myself and how I could make myself better by their example. 

I was able to relax the reins and learn and implement in my pace, not what was in the book or training period.  

I want to help you decode yourself so you can learn how to become a better stronger you. In what ever area you want to start in first.

Thank you for listening/watching this episode. Share this episode with a friend that you think would enjoy it.

I would love it if you took the time to leave a rating or review for the show.

Want me to go more in-depth about anything? Let me know.

Send an email with questions to skahrhoff@live.com.

Or you can go to the website to send a message-https://www.buzzsprout.com/2418860

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi, I'm Shannon Carroff. I love learning. And I've been a part of leadership development business. I love self-help books. I love ways of improving everything. I am not a genius where I can look at something and create brand new from scratch. I am one of these people who likes to learn things, break it down, understand it, and then I create something that works for me. It's taken time, and it's just because I could never figure out why what was in this book and what they're teaching here didn't quite work for me. And it was making me angry, quite honestly. Why didn't it work for me? What was my failure? What was my problem? Why could I not succeed in the simple black and white information laid out here? It wasn't until last year when I was creating the podcast for hairstylists on how to be more relatable to clients and how to understand them and be more efficient with explaining things to them. I finally realized the reason that all of this information didn't work as quickly and as thoroughly as I expected it was because I wasn't the personality that the writer of the book and the programs were. They were all very direct. They were in your face, they have no fear, they just have a mission and they just go for it and do it. That's not the whole world. And I was beating myself up trying to become that person. Well, here's the light bulb moment for me. I'm not trying to become them. And I was for so many years. I thought I had to become them, live out their habits and their checkpoints to be able to become successful like them. The reality is I can't become them because I'm me. I just need to be a better version of myself. And that's okay. And I have through every book I've read, every process that I've tried to master and figure out and become better. I took an extension class years ago, and this education was actually what led me here today, because it relit the fire in me of becoming better. It stepped me back into leadership information of becoming a better person, understanding how to motivate yourself, do your dreams, become more, and to expect more from you. By taking that hair extension class, it led me to take more classes with them, which eventually led me to realizing I have something I can teach. Who knew hair extension class would lead me to this path? I went very far into the education and I sat there in a class and I was like, no, this isn't right for me. This is not feeling right. The class was fantastic, information's fantastic. I'm watching so many stylists thrive right now with the information that they are teaching them. It just wasn't right for me. Because I feel like I was meant to do this podcast to help understand that you can be anything you want if you figure out a few basic steps. I want the results they have. And the results are different for me because we all have different personalities. I've realized that my personality is totally different than the people who wrote the books and created the programs and stuff like that. I have to process things a little bit slower. Set me a one month deadline to get everything accomplished. I can do it. Don't get me wrong, I will bust my butt and get it done, but the effect will not last because it's not how I process things. I have to baby step into things, I have to understand it, process it, and figure out the process that works for me. Because I don't think the way they do. And if you realize it, most educational formats all come from the main leaders in self-help, in business mindset, and the right habits. They all have the same starting point, and so they have the same fundamentals. And a lot of it doesn't mesh with me. The whole getting up at five o'clock in the morning so you can exercise, you can read your book, you can go through all of your list of things that you have to accomplish for the day. That's not me. I'm a night owl, I'm not a morning person. And I failed already because you're not gonna wake me up at five o'clock in the morning and actually function. Because my brain works better from three o'clock in the afternoon until who knows when in the morning. That's just how I thrive. I've tried reprogramming myself, I've started work early, and I still you can't, I don't believe you can change your internal clock of when your brain likes to process. You have to figure out what works best for you. I wanted to become the best version of me. I didn't want to become them because I tried. I have tried so many times to be them, to wake up early before I had to get up my daughter, and to read the book, and to do whatever steps they suggested, depending on what I was improving and trying to create a new habit. Great information. But because of who I am, I've had to switch things. And it took me years to understand how I was working and why I wasn't a failure. Because they didn't give you any understanding of who you are, how you're hardwired, how you need to process things, how you need to goal plan, how you personally flow the best. And once you figure that out, you can go do anything because you can take the information and you'll be able to understand the fundamentals of what he's teaching you, and you can switch it into the format that works for you. You're not changing the main process of what he wants you to do to become to create these habits. You're just morphing it into the information and the steps that work for you, like me, night owl. I will sit down and prioritize and read my book and figure out the steps I need to do for the next day. I can't get up in the morning and function. I actually homeschooled my daughter from kindergarten up to high school. Whenever you homeschool, you're supposed to figure out your child. You're supposed to figure out their learning style, the behavior style, what kind of interest they have. It is very much an individualized lesson plan. This is how I prioritize my daughter. I wanted to find the best way to teach her so learning can be fun, so it could become a lifelong habit for her and not feel like a punishment. Just like how I figured my daughter out, you have to figure out yourself out. You have to figure out what time of day works best for you, the best way that you need to organize your life and figure out your priorities in your life. And once you figure out your priorities, things will become easier to categorize into your life. These are the basics of figuring out a lot of stuff. So instead of me feeling like a failure with everything that I've done for most of my life, I'm finally figuring out what needs to change in the habit-wise, just in the steps to get it to become easy for me. So it's one bite at a time to make it achievable. And I took a podcasting class, and she was pretty amazing because I took one podcasting short class, like an intro, and she was all about precision and making it perfect and understanding every little detail how to be just right before you started, because you don't want to screw up. That was the old me. That was me who was so scared of making a mistake and ruining everything and blowing up all my chances. And then I found this other person who I actually invested the class in, and she was a suggestion from a friend who had been through it. She had a podcast of her own, and I liked her flow. She suggested this person, she was doing uh a week-long introduction into the information of how she presents things. And her whole suggestion was be a C student, just start. It doesn't have to be perfect. You can figure it out as you go. It doesn't have to be exact. Life is messy, just start. There's the whole trick. And so I did. And thank God I did, because it taught me so much with everything. It took the pressure off of me to just start. And with this process, I eventually learned that I don't have to do it at her pace. It's okay. It's not like she's checking my homework. Now she was probably checking in on the podcast and stuff like that as I created them and realized I wasn't doing everything she wanted, and she didn't say anything. It's okay. But this was my permission slip to create something of my own in my own time, in my own pace. And it was amazing. But I also learned more while I created the podcast. It was eye-opening, and this is where I'm at right now. I don't want you to become me. I don't want you to become John Maxwell. I want you the results of John Maxwell because he is phenomenal. He has proven that he knows his stuff, and he has taught so many people along the way of how to get big results. And that's the key. He has the results to follow in. But missing the mark on how to teach people how to do it uniquely, them, how to master exactly who you are and how you want to do it. And this is where I want to help guide you because you need to be the best version of you. And only you can do that by understanding who you are, what you value, how your mind works, what priorities you want, and how much time a day you actually have to put towards it. Now I will tell you, it's probably a little bit more than you're thinking because I was thinking everything has to be calm and quiet and perfect. And that's not reality. You can fit in little bits and pieces on in the middle of your crazy day. Like you're driving home from work and your mind's rolling, and all of a sudden this thought pops into your head and you're like, oh, okay. You can hit the voice memo and record it down and set it aside for later. When you're sitting down, you have the time and the patience to process things. It's okay. You figure it out as you go once you start messy. So who knows what is going to click with you? It could be something simple like personality breakdowns like me. Now I'll be honest. I have learned so many different personality breakdowns that don't really click. I love little bits and pieces here, little bits and pieces there, because I like systems. I like categories. That's how my mind processes things. I need to understand where to categorize different things. And none of them really sunk in. I didn't even realize over time I had created my own. I didn't have names for them. I didn't have like anything written down structure. It was all in the head. It was how I understood my clients. When they sat down, I could watch them walk in the room and figure out oh, that's who they are. That's the personality. Okay, let's check out the next thing. And we'll see how they carry in their drink and keys and phone and purse and bag, and that's telling also. And it's it's crazy after you understand what it is. I can watch someone and how they talk to me, I can understand how they want to be spoken back. I can tell if someone wants me to break down every detail of how I'm going to apply color to their hair, how I'm going to mix it, the tone, the depth, everything. Or I can just say, Do you trust me? Okay, let's go. And that's how I've learned through all these years of implementing the personalities that I've created. And I broke it down in my first two seasons of the podcast. So it's all there. I'll run through it again. But it's a lot of the individual things that you have to understand to figure out who you are. I think this is the starting point that everyone needs to be on. They need to figure out who you are. And you need to figure out what makes you thrive and makes you grind and what your number one priority is. It might not be what you think it is. So if this interests you, come back. We'll figure some things out. I'll break it down to you step by step as it works for me. If you have any questions along the way, please drop them. Email to me. I would love to have questions that I could answer if anything doesn't compute. I mean, it it took me years to get to this point. Getting down to the basics of who you are is mind-blowing. Whenever you have never looked that close at you before, it's just pushing through and figuring out what task you need to do. What do they want from me? What do I need to do to make them happy? The small things. And it it's crazy. It is actually so fun when you actually figure out why you think the way you think. And if you've always wondered, why do you do that? Why do I do that? I don't understand. This might actually help you because I know it opened me up big time. Like, oh, that's why I can be so organized here and I can be a whole mess over here. It's okay. It's part of the game of figuring out who you are. So if this sounds interesting, great. I'll see you next time.