Hey mama, welcome to the inside out mama's podcast. I'm Brittany Turley, mom of six, and I know what it's like to feel stuck and overwhelmed trying to be the perfect mom. But everything changed for me when I learned that small changes on the inside can bring big results on the outside. Each week, I will share simple yet powerful inside shifts or outside tips that can transform your approach to mothering, helping you thrive from the inside out. Ready to ditch the mom guilt and enjoy this season of life? You're in the right place.

So what makes someone an expert? When I looked on the internet for definitions of an expert, what I found was an expert is someone who has a high level of knowledge, skill, or or experience in a particular subject or field. We take our kids to the doctor when they're sick because they are an expert on health. We take our kids to the dentist because they are an expert on teeth. It is likely that you've talked to many experts on different subjects to get their expertise to help with different subjects or problems with your kids or family or yourself. But have you ever considered the idea that you are an expert on your kids? If you think about the definition that I found, that an expert is someone with a high level of knowledge, skill, or experience in a particular subject, I think that applies very much to mothers. We have a lot of knowledge, a lot of skill, and lots of experience with our children. For example, have you ever had an experience with your kids where you just know them so well that you know how they're going to react in a certain situation, and you're able to have things ready to help them through it, or plan ahead of time so that If something happens, they have the tools they need. Also, when I was looking up about an expert, I found online that generally it's considered to require around 10, 000 hours of deliberate practice to be considered an expert in a field. So if you were someone who was actually working 24 hours a day with no breaks, no sleep, which sometimes is what mothering feels like, then. You would be an expert in 417 days. That's a little over a year. Let's say that you're actually getting around six hours of sleep a night, and that we're not counting while you're sleeping, even though our brain does work at night, organizing and filing away all the information we gained during the day. Then it would take One and a half years to become an expert on your child. So, at the very least, by the time the kid is two, you are an expert on them. Another cool phenomenon that I Discovered is something called microchimerism. During pregnancy, fetal cells pass through the placenta and then get into the mother's tissue, including the bloodstream, the brain, the heart, and other organs. And these cells can continue on in the mother's body for decades after birth. So, we're literally carrying part of our children with us long after they're born. Making us even better experts on them? Because we have their cells inside of our body. But if we put all the facts aside and just think about how would it change how you feel and act to believe that you are an expert on your kids? How would you feel around the experts that you use to help you while raising your kids like doctors and dentists? Would it give you more confidence? Would it help you feel more confident in your decision making? Have you ever been in a situation with an expert where they are telling you something and they have a lot of data to prove that it's best for your kid, but Inside, you just feel like that is not the best choice for your kid. I've had many types of those situations. While I acknowledge that doctors and dentists and teachers, they have professional expertise but they see our children in specific contexts. As a mom, we can see our child across all contexts and all situations. This is true not only for our kids, but also for us as a mom and as a family unit. For example, A few years ago, I was researching what are the screen time recommendations for kids. I was wanting to see what the experts said about screen time recommendations for different age levels and just to make sure I was being realistic with my kids. I read lots of articles on lots of topics and looked in lots of different websites. In multiple places, I read advice from experts that screen time for kids should be had with an adult right there with them, watching alongside them. This brought lots of, uh, guilt for me. I was feeling bad because I I don't give my kids a lot of screen time, but when I do, I use that time to get a lot of things done. Then as I read a little further, and I read the bios on these experts, I realized that they didn't have any children of their own. Then I was able to process their advice differently. I could see the logic in this advice that if you're going to let your kid have screen time that you watch it with them so you know what they're consuming and so you could be there to answer questions and have conversations around whatever they're watching. But then I could also see how this advice wouldn't work for me and my kids unless I had the funds to hire help to do all of the cooking and the cleaning and the house management that also comes along with raising kids. These experts knew a lot about how kids grow and how they develop and what would be best for them, but having never been a parent themselves, They didn't understand the part of being a mom that involves the cooking and the cleaning and the house management and how much time that takes and to be with your child every moment is just not possible. So owning that I'm the expert on my kids and on my mothering, I don't give my kids much screen time, but when I do, I don't usually sit there with them. I go get things done. I also believe that moms have intuition that no expert can have. They can sense what is best for their kids. And sometimes that is right in line with what the expert's saying. And sometimes it goes against it. But having confidence in knowing that You know your kid best can make all the difference Now just because you're an expert doesn't mean that you're always gonna know the right answer and that you're always gonna get it right. But what I'm trying to get at is holding on to the thought that you are the expert on your kids can give you the confidence that you need when you're in situations and experts are telling you something that just doesn't seem right for your child. That just doesn't feel right. As a mom. You will get lots of advice and ideas from experts and non experts. My experience is that much of it will be so helpful to you and to your kids as you're raising them. But sometimes it can seem so overwhelming like everybody knows what's best for your kid but you. It's those times when it will be most helpful to remember that you are the expert on your kids. You know what is best for them because you can see the whole child. You know more about them. Now, because I believe small changes on the inside bring big results on the outside, each week on my podcast I'm going to give you a small changes challenge. Something small that you could do throughout the week if you choose, that could end up bringing big results to your life. So, the small change challenge for this week is just to try out the thought that you are the expert on your kids. And when you're in situations where people are giving you advice or you're not sure what to do, remember that thought. And see how it helps you gain the confidence you need to move forward. Remember, small changes on the inside bring big results on the outside. Thank you for joining me for another episode of Inside Out Mamas. My hope is that our time together inspires more feelings of peace, confidence, and joy in your mama journey. Be sure to subscribe so you never miss a show. And if you're ready to take these insights even deeper, head over to brittanyturleycoaching. com to check out my digital workshop designed to help you reduce daily mom overwhelm without adding to your to do list. Thanks for listening, and remember, Small changes on the inside bring big results on the outside.