Rewire Your Inner Voice

Your body is throwing an emergency brake while you're still trying to climb uphill—that's burnout. And the most alarming part? Most women don't realize they're experiencing burnout until their bodies physically force them to stop.

Burnout isn't a badge of honor or a sign that you're working hard enough. It's a clear signal that your nervous system has been running a marathon without water breaks. 

The good news? Healing from burnout doesn't require adding more to your already overwhelming schedule. Forget the three-hour morning routines and complicated self-care regimens. 

Chapters

• 0:00 Signs Your Body Is Screaming Burnout
• 2:42 The Three E's of Burnout
• 4:00 The Burnout Formula Explained
• 5:03 Rest and Recovery: Your Healing Path
• 8:15 Rewiring Your Inner Voice
• 10:00 Do Less, Do It Better Philosophy

Transcript

Emily Feist: 0:00

Burnout isn't just about being a little tired. It's your body throwing an emergency brake while you're trying to go uphill. And the worst part is most women don't even realize they're in burnout until their body goes. Nope, we're done here, welcome to 'It Starts at Vagus', where we take a nervous system approach to feeling good again.

Emily Feist: 0:20

I'm Emily and I'm your guide to stress relief, without adding more to your to-do list, because we're and I'm your guide to stress relief, without adding more to your to-do list, because we're doing less but we're doing it better.

Emily Feist: 0:30

Today we're going to be talking about something that's not just physical or mental. It's nervous system deep and that's burnout. We're going to decode it, make fun of it a little, because humor is medicine and, most importantly, offer you tools that don't require a three-hour morning routine

Emily Feist: 0:48

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Emily Feist: 0:48

First off, the burnout check-in. Let's start with the signs of burnout. You might be in burnout if you're exhausted, even after eight hours of sleep. The hobbies you used to love now feel like chores. You are just one spilled cup of coffee away from losing your mind, and cynicism is your new love language For me. My alarms go off when I feel numb. It's when I care less about what I am doing in my free time. Free time is pretty rare for me, and when that free time does show up, I want to enjoy it. But when I start wanting to feel numb, to gravitating, to wanting to feel numb, I know that this is a big sign for me to get rejuvenated, that I need to be doing something that makes me feel better, especially since I don't want to be, which sounds ridiculous, but sometimes we're at war with our own self when this happens, when I'm doing things that I usually would like to do, but I just don't enjoy them anymore. This is when I know that I need that vagus nerve exercise reset and I put that in the links below in the description. So if you want to find out how to do that step-by-step, you can go ahead and watch the video. But that is my go-to because once I reset my nervous system, I start feeling like myself again, I start enjoying the things that I used to like, and then I felt numb. Then I do the vagus nerve exercise and then I start feeling myself. I start enjoying those things all over and it is wonderful. It's so night and day and it's so important to support our nerve system so that we can enjoy our day-to-day life.

Emily Feist: 2:42

So there are three E's to burnout. First one is exhaustion, then escape, then edginess. Let's break this down. Exhaustion that is where we are physically and emotionally fatigued, where we just don't feel like we have it inside us to keep going, where we have to force it and we're so tired and it just takes that mental load to get anything accomplished. Then there's escape. This is withdrawing from the things that you've once cared about. Like I just said, I gravitate to wanting to feel numb. I don't want to feel the bad, I don't want to feel the good, I just want to be that numb feeling so that I don't have to feel anything, which is a terrible place to be, because life is enjoyable and we want to do that. The third one, which is edginess that's where you're irritable, frustrated and you might even have that desire to hide away from people. Put yourself in that bathroom and just lock out life.

Emily Feist: 3:48

Those three signs of burnout say it is time to take care of your nervous system because it will help you physically and emotionally, which is a win-win. So what causes burnout? Burnout isn't just working too hard. It can be deeper than that. We have the work-life balance. If that's all off and you're doing too much work and not enough enjoying life. There's also feeling unseen or underappreciated. You could feel like you've got that perfectionism in you and your inner critic is screaming on a microphone and you just can't settle it down and say it's okay not to be perfect. So, in a nutshell, there is kind of like a formula to figuring out if we have burnout, and that is high responsibility with low support minus rest equals burnout. So again, it's high responsibility plus low support, minus rest equals burnout.

Emily Feist: 4:54

All right, so now that we know we have burnout, we realize it, we realize that we're irritable or wanting to hide or numb like I do, let's find our healing path. Because it's not another job I swear it is not it is rest and recovery. Once you get your nervous system settled down or you're still in the process of being kind to your nervous system, that rest and recovery will support it even more. So we're not going to glamorize productivity. We are going to prioritize at least seven, dare I say even nine, hours of sleep, because at night your brain literally cleans itself. It needs that time to take out the trash of the day and rejuvenate. It is very important for your brain to be able to do that.

Emily Feist: 5:43

You can also schedule those guilt-free micro breaks throughout the day. They're just little moments where you can either laugh or take a moment of gratitude, those sparkles of joy that can remind you that today is okay, even if you're having a bad one, or if you're having a stressful day. You can say I'm going to take this micro moment to breathe for a little bit. So do these things that bring you joy. It might feel, quote, unquote, useless, not productive. For example, that would be like taking time to doodle where there's really no point aside from helping you feel better. It's not gonna be part of your to-do list. It is simply there for you to enjoy.

Emily Feist: 6:35

Rest isn't earned by being miserable first. You don't need to suffer to deserve a nap. Remember that, because our body relies on rest. It's how it functions and feels good, and you can have self-compassion over self-criticism for yourself by practicing some mindful techniques, or even by practicing mindful techniques, or even if it's three slow, deep breaths while hiding in your bathroom. Get those micro moments in and you can replace the thought of I should be doing more to what needs to get done right now and can it be done at a different time, because there are some things that need to get done right now and we need to claim those responsibilities.

Emily Feist: 7:25

But sometimes we put things on ourselves that don't and it can be done at a later time or, better yet, can it be delegated. We can also talk to yourself like someone that you love. Sometimes that self-criticism, it just beats us down, even though nobody's saying it to us other than ourselves. But think of yourself as your cheerleader, not a cranky boss. You should be supporting yourself, rooting for yourself, saying yeah, you got this, and take those moments to say I can do this and I am. That's all it is. You are doing it, but with the support of your nervous system regulation.

Emily Feist: 8:08

So let's rewire your inner voice. We're going to recognize, interrupt and validate. So, step one, recognize a negative thought. Step two, interrupt it with truth or curiosity, because, remember, we are curious people. The world is so glamorous and so deep. The human body alone amazes me every single day when I think of what the human body can do and overcome and create. It's amazing. There are endless possibilities.

Emily Feist: 8:44

So if you're a curious person, start getting curious and if you're a person that needs to be grounded in truth, look for things that are true, because when we are criticizing ourself, we tell ourself lies. Often it's really easy to lie to yourself and that is why we need to be grounded in truth and that curiosity to interrupt those negative thoughts. Then you validate yourself with a new, supportive reframe. So you take those truths, you take that curiosity and you mesh them up together and say you know, whenever I do this, I'm going to think that instead, again, be your cheerleader, let's reframe your mindset. Take this one little motto of do less, do it better, Because when we break it down into little, tiny steps, we're able to feel accomplished, we're able to do it easier, we're able to feel like we're doing the little steps to support our nervous system, our physical and mental wellbeing, and get that quick win. We're not overdoing it, we're not adding, we're doing less but doing it well.

Emily Feist: 9:55

For example, folding laundry. Now you could leave it to become a laundry tree, where it's big at the base and smaller on top, and you've got this tree of laundry. Or you could say I'm going to take two songs that I like, or even one song that you like. Fold the laundry while you sing their song. That singing will help your vagus nerve settle down and you'll be getting a project done, more happy. Then you can go ahead and give yourself a high five for getting the laundry done and not making a Christmas tree from laundry.

Emily Feist: 10:34

And remember you're not lazy, you're healing. There's a big difference. Burnout isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign saying that your nervous system has been running a marathon with no water breaks. The world may not slow down, but you can. You must, for your own sake and for the version that's waiting for you on the other side of rest. Thank you for spending some time with me today. May you find your rest before you're forced to, and I hope your body feels less burdened, you breathe more open and your next step is lighter than the last. We'll see you next week. Thanks for listening to. It Starts at Vegas. New episodes are released every Tuesday. If you liked this episode, go ahead and give it a subscribe button so that you get notifications and don't miss out on what's coming next. If you'd like a step-by-step video on how to do a pain-free and easy vagus nerve exercise, grab my free vagus nerve reset video in the show notes. It's what I do when I feel like I just not like myself. Until next time, remember, wellness starts at vagus.