#55- Charles Hill talks near death experience, giving Matt his first stage time, insane puke stories

Episode #55 of Good Times Noodle Salad brings it full circle with special guest Charles Hill—a comic who didn’t just grind his way into the scene, but helped build it from the ground up.

Charles takes us back to how he first got started in comedy and what inspired him to launch the open mic at One Night Stan’s—creating opportunities for comics who just needed a shot… including Matt, who got his very first stage time thanks to Charles. From that moment to now, the stories come full circle in the best way.

Speaking of stories—Matt goes on an all-time run of puke stories that gets so vivid it actually makes Charles nauseous in real time. It’s disgusting, hilarious, and completely on-brand chaos.

But the episode also takes a serious turn as Charles shares a deeply personal and traumatic experience—nearly suffocating from a bad reaction to medication before surgery. That moment became a turning point in his life, ultimately pushing him toward stand-up comedy and giving him a new perspective that still shapes his material today.

We also get into Charles’ time on the Mic-O-Holics tour, life on the road, and what it really takes to stick with comedy through the highs and lows.

It’s a mix of origin stories, near-death experiences, gross-out comedy, and real-deal perspective—exactly the kind of ride GTNS is built for.

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:40

Back nipples. Fireball out of back nipples?

SPEAKER_07 0:44

Oh hell yeah. That was I don't know why that hit me so hard. I drink fireball like all the time.

SPEAKER_03 0:49

I love how you could call me a pussy for drinking it. Coughing out your fireball over there.

SPEAKER_07 0:56

Sneezing it out of my fucking nose. You're like, oh, I can't drink the elixir of life, but you drink fucking cinnamon flavored beer.

SPEAKER_03 1:03

Cinnamon stings the back of my throat. Oh, dude.

SPEAKER_07 1:10

Fuck yeah. Dude, how long how long have you been doing comedy? Would you say 10 years? Six and a half years. Six and a half years? Yeah right on. Yeah. I don't I don't do it like a full-on interview, but anytime I talk to comics. Yeah. Anytime I talk to comics, I'm like, how did you get started?

SPEAKER_03 1:23

I'm young enough that I'm still adding the half years in there, I guess.

SPEAKER_07 1:27

Like the kids. I'm 11 and a half, and that matters.

SPEAKER_03 1:32

One day I'll learn comedy's not even real.

SPEAKER_07 1:35

Fuck yeah, six and a half years.

SPEAKER_03 1:36

Where'd you start at? I my the punchline was my very first open mic. Where's that? The South in the Southfield. Punchline Comedy Club in Southfield.

SPEAKER_07 1:43

I haven't been there. Oh no.

SPEAKER_03 1:44

Is it still still around? Yeah, they still have open mics on Mondays and Tuesdays. It's an urban club.

unknown 1:50

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:51

I didn't know anything about uh comedy, and I, you know, had to Google where to go and go to an open mic, and the only answers I got were Mark really's comedy castle, which he had to submit to, and Punchline had a uh uh you know you it just show up go up format. I was nervous. I went, I was just gonna watch, but I decided to go up and you know I had a good time.

SPEAKER_07 2:10

Yeah. That was pretty much that was pretty much exactly how I started. Is like I I went to one night stands and like three or four times, and then I was like, all right, let's sign up, let's try to get on.

SPEAKER_03 2:21

Yeah, and then it takes a while to get to talking to anybody for you know to learn about MCN or any of the other pages or groups that you can go to to you know network and and find all those other open mic. I opened mic for like two months, punchline was the only place I went to.

SPEAKER_07 2:33

Yeah. I'm trying to figure out which ones are like worth going to because you like in Metro Detroit, it's like you might drive a hundred miles.

SPEAKER_03 2:42

They're all they're all worth it, especially in the beginning. You know, a lot of people talk about how valuable stage time is, you know. Yeah, in the beginning, any stage time is valuable. Um, I'll admit the old room that I used to run wasn't always a great room, it was hardly ever a great room. You know, and it was way over on the east side, but we we made it fun, you know. We did we we did the best with what we had over there, yeah. Uh I I I hit them all and and and because the more mics you go to, even if you're gonna drive to Lansing, I drove, you know, I was driving to Grand Rapids, Ohio, you know, uh you know, just to open mic early on. I think it's the best way to go about doing it. Just you you network with so many people and then you get more opportunities.

SPEAKER_07 3:21

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The uh so I I did uh home slice for Crumbly and uh like a couple months ago, and I was like, I feel like I was putting so much weight on it because of how far the drive is right here. Yeah, because we like I live like a fucking half mile from the studio, so I'm like so it's a it's a drive. And uh we get there and we got there so early, it was like almost like it started to feel like we were hanging out at a doctor's office. Like, motherfucker, when is this gonna happen? You know? That was funny. And uh it was our own fault. We got there so early.

SPEAKER_09 3:54

And uh their pizza was good.

SPEAKER_07 3:56

Yeah, so like we got to get there some pizza over with it. We and like I'm so fucking I don't know if I don't know what to what ailment to blame it on. Is it ADHD or autism? But like if there's a TV on behind me, uh behind you, like if we were sitting at a table at a restaurant and there's a TV on behind you, I'm not gonna hear a single word you said.

SPEAKER_03 4:12

On the same exact way.

SPEAKER_07 4:14

And so like I watched I read like Independence Day while Paige talked at me for like two hours.

SPEAKER_03 4:21

No, I the the same thing happens to me. If I'm in a bar sometimes where there's TVs and they flash sometimes and and the I I completely space out or I can't I can't focus on what I'm doing sometimes. Yeah. But if if there was the smallest noise going on in the corner of the room, that is all my ears would pick up. And I we wouldn't be able to have a conversation right now.

unknown 4:41

Right.

SPEAKER_07 4:41

Dude, I'm yeah, I'm exactly the same way.

SPEAKER_09 4:43

I'm always listening to other people's conversations at restaurants. I don't try to do it, but I can tell you everything about their dish.

SPEAKER_07 5:01

Common hallway for all the other suites. And once in a while, people would be standing out like behind us, like on the other side of the window, talking. They're just being innocent, talking on the other side of the window, and the rage that would boil up inside me was not proportionate. I should be like, fucking come on! Of all the places to stop, you stop right there, and then my brain is just gonna be like fucking.

SPEAKER_03 5:23

I get that way of dive bars. If somebody's like pulls up their phone and they start watching TikTok videos, and I you can hear the talking. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Or you know, yeah, it's it's I I can't stand it.

SPEAKER_07 5:33

Dude, we were talking about this at work today. We got a little speaker that we pretend that we don't have at work because we're not allowed to. But uh so I have a sp I had a speaker out and I'm playing music or whatever. One of the guys that I used to work with is a control freak about the music, and his taste in music is terrible. It's all like 2004 rap and like exclusively like 50 cent in the game, and like that's fine. But then, like, three months into the job, you're like, dude, can you put on fucking like anything else? Like, I'll listen to Kenny G. We've evolved slightly since then, you know, right. And uh but this motherfucker, uh, I was talking about this today with my apprentice, is he he connects to the radio, he he disconnects my phone from the radio and then connects his phone to the radio, and I'm welding, so I can't like just like walk over there and like undo what he undid, you know? And uh so he connects, he puts on music for like maybe 30 seconds, and then he goes on TikTok and starts scrolling. So the audio of like five seconds of TikTok videos at a time is playing over the speaker. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me right now, dude? And he goes, uh, he's like, Well, your music sucks. I'm like, well, play fucking music. He's like, I'm gonna watch what I want to watch while you're welding. So I took the radio and I fucking threw it as hard as I could, threw it like a hundred feet.

SPEAKER_03 6:48

You do have radio.

SPEAKER_07 6:50

I was like, fuck you. Like, like, go listen to it up there. We are we were in a trench. I'm like, I fucking and that is why my phone. That's why my phone has these black dots on it. Nice because I I put it in my fucking bibs, it's winter time. I put it in my bibs and I was welding, and I melted my screen in my phone case. Uh impressive. Dickhead. Yeah. Fun times. Like I fucking broke a window on a crane recently.

SPEAKER_09 7:22

Out of being mad?

SPEAKER_07 7:23

No. No, no. Out of being uh what's the word I'm not allowed to use that you get real offended if I use it? Like he's out of him being neurodivergent. He uh he was trying to s he was he had a piece of pipe on uh hooked up to a crane and he was trying to swing the end of the pipe around the cab, and he couldn't hold the weight, so the so the pipe just like went into the cab, which could have killed the fucking crane operator. Oh my god. Yeah, that guy's a fucking idiot. Anyway. Fuck you, Mark. Dude, uh so I you know what we were talking about? I was like, I don't know if Charles is from this side of town. I just assume you are, because I see you in Waterford every other week.

SPEAKER_03 8:12

Kind of. I mean, I live in Farmington Hills now.

SPEAKER_07 8:14

Okay, so it's 20 25 minutes or something. Half hour. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 8:18

It's like it's like 12, it's like 12 miles, but it takes a half hour to get here. Yeah, there's no good way to get here. Yeah. Yeah. At one point, I I I was averaging like three miles on or three minutes a mile to get here today. It was fun.

SPEAKER_07 8:32

Yeah, there's no good way to get here.

SPEAKER_03 8:34

Fucking round the lakes, you go. Dude, I know.

SPEAKER_09 8:37

That's why I didn't want to move here because I was like, there is no good way to get around Waterford. You have to go around everything and too much.

SPEAKER_07 8:44

Doesn't it suck having a driver on all these beautiful? It's sweet if I had a boat.

SPEAKER_09 8:47

That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_07 8:48

Like, we don't have a boat. We don't we can get a boat. I'll get you a boat. Okay, I'll hold you to that. I got we have two plastic boats. They count. Right. Yeah. They count. Right? No. I can get you a little fucking drill and then like hook the drill up to like a like a drywall paddle bit, and that's fucking done. Fucking yeah, dude. It's fine. Isn't it a burden to have to drive around all the nice mansions and fucking lakes that we have to to get to the grocery store? Oh, it's such a such a burden. It is. I grew up in Roseville, dude. This place is like fucking a vacation time compared to Roseville. We didn't have like when I'd watch old westerns, I'd be like, we don't like we don't get tumbleweeds in Roseville. We get like tumble Walmart bags that just like float across 12 mile to my mom's house.

SPEAKER_03 9:41

I was uh Hazel Park, so another east side uh hell yeah, scum bags! The white trash that he's dude.

SPEAKER_07 9:49

Fuck yeah. I grew I grew up on 12 and 94. You know what we did? We didn't grow up playing little league. Love your Roseville. I don't. I the only time I go back there is to say hi to my mom. Dude, the uh we didn't play Little League growing up in Roseville. We just took like fucking landscape stones from around the trees and threw them into I-94. That was this that's a that's true. I believe that. That's real. That's why my that's why there's like missing patches of rocks in my mom's landscaping.

SPEAKER_03 10:19

We are so alike because I got brought home in a cop car when I was like 12 because we were shooting uh water balloons on the cars on a nine-mile with one of those shots. We were hiding behind the Dairy Queen, launching them in the cars as they drive by.

SPEAKER_07 10:33

Dude, I love this. Fuck yeah. You get arrested for that? That's just they just drove me home in the cop car.

SPEAKER_03 10:37

This is good, clean fun. I that was like it happened in like May. I spent the entire summer in my bedroom.

SPEAKER_07 10:43

Dude, okay, we are you're you're not even you're we are so alike. This is uncanny. I got arrested at 12 years old because my buddies, I was rollerblading in my backyard, like in my um like up and down my mom's driveway, and my buddies called me on the house phone and said, Hey, come meet us at this like old car dealership that was in the neighborhood of like at 12 and Grashit. And uh so I did, but I can't I put the house phone in my pocket. My mom is convinced that I was like, oh, if she calls, I'll be home. No, I was just a dumbass and I forgot the phone was in my pocket. So I skated down to the old car dealership, and they found a bucket of pears by somebody's house, and they were throwing the pears through the window or through all the like the nine by nine, like glass pane, the glass panes of the old dealership. I showed up and like 15 seconds later I heard sirens. I'm like, oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me. So I start rollerblading away. And smooth. A cop turns down Michigan Street in Roseville and hits me with his car to stop me. Like like barely, but enough to like, I was like 12, so I started crying like immediately.

SPEAKER_10 12:00

Right.

SPEAKER_07 12:00

And he puts me in the back of his cruiser and he's like, Don't step on that coat. He had like a leather Roseville police coat in the back, so I was sitting there rolling on it. Fuck you. So I was like rolling my rollerblades all over his jacket. And uh, and he he they call my mom, they fucking drive me home, and my mom is beating the shit out of me. She had to go get my sister. She puts me in her Mustang and she's like punching me in the fucking chest and throat.

SPEAKER_05 12:27

Jesus! You stupid motherfucker, you're gonna get fucking arrested. I was like, I was there for like two seconds, I didn't even do anything.

SPEAKER_09 12:34

He didn't get arrested, he just brought got home.

SPEAKER_07 12:36

Oh, the other well, the other god, what was there, two or three of them? Those guys got in like legitimate trouble. Like their parents had to like pay for all the damage and stuff. And I I don't know how we got out of it. I that was like the end of it, but I was grounded for the entire summer because of that fucking 15 seconds that I was there, and uh I remember in the like it had to have been like two months into being grounded. I literally like she took my TV away, I wasn't allowed to watch TV, wasn't allowed to like I was confined to my room until she was home, and then I could go with her to do whatever she was doing, which was almost exclusively going to fucking Costco, you know, and but like two months into being grounded, I found a pack of Newports that I hid under my bunk beds, and I was like, yes, I have something to break up the monotony. I could go smoke a newport once in a while.

SPEAKER_03 13:31

Oh yeah, that's rough. I the my punishment they they tacked it on because I we had a two-car uh driveway and it was it was kind of long, and we had a basketball rim on the drive on the garage, and I had just bought a portable hoop to put at the the the end of the driveway to have full court.

SPEAKER_07 13:47

Oh, right on.

SPEAKER_03 13:47

And my parents let all my friends in the neighborhood play in my driveway, and I had to watch them out of my bedroom window.

SPEAKER_07 13:53

Oh, that's fucking brutal. All summer long. It is so brutal. Dude, that's that if your parents are fucking mean people, dude. You will sit here and you won't. At least my mom made it known she didn't like my friends. She's like, You're not welcome here, whether I'm here or not.

SPEAKER_03 14:11

I suppose I deserved it.

SPEAKER_07 14:12

Oh, dude, that's fucking hilarious. Oh my god, that's so rude.

SPEAKER_09 14:16

These are bad kids.

SPEAKER_07 14:18

I was a terrible kid. It's not like uh dude, I I've talked about this before. My mom had two dollar, like a two-dollar bill collection. I think, like, I think, if I remember right, I think she was kind of told like they're stopping making two dollar bills, they're gonna be worth a lot in the future. So she got like a few hundred dollars worth of two dollar bills from the bank, and I stole probably two or three hundred bucks worth of two dollar bills. I was walking around like king shit, just spending money. I was taking my friends to Ramshorn, getting them breakfast. We were skipping school and shit, smoking her Virginia school. Yeah, and like, yeah, dude. I fucking I bought a I bought a BMX bike from Walmart with two dollar bills. It's like Jeffrey money, dude. Uh yeah, I the waitress at Ramshorn thought they were fake. It was hilarious because like she tried to hold us there for a while. Like I bought like me and my three buddies breakfast at Ramshorn. We ate breakfast and we're sitting there smoking Virginia Slims, and I paid with like$20 of$2 bills. And she's like, What is this? Are you fucking serious? Wow.

SPEAKER_09 15:25

They were real.

SPEAKER_07 15:26

They were real, they were real two dollar bills. It's so dumb. That's so dumb to think back to. No wonder my mom fucking fucking hates my guts. She does not hate you anymore. It's gonna cost me a thousand bucks to pay her back for the 200 bucks. I'm gonna pay her back in pennies. These will be worth so much soon. You you can't believe it. Cost more than a penny to make a penny.

SPEAKER_03 15:54

Pay her back in bonds and tell her she's gotta wait.

SPEAKER_07 15:56

35 years. Oh, they're coming to get me.

SPEAKER_09 16:01

Oh, I he admitted it.

SPEAKER_07 16:05

Oh, dude. Fuck yeah. So how do you how'd you get started doing the mic at uh One Night Stands?

SPEAKER_03 16:12

I before I started running the mic, I hung out there all the time. Like it was the first club I got booked at, and then you know they kept booking me. I you know, they I felt comfortable and at home there. Yeah, and uh so I hung out, I hung out there most Thursday nights, even when I'm not running the open mic. And um it was about a a year before I approached Mike about running an open mic in that in in the the lounge in there, and he he was open to it, and for whatever reason I was just so busy, I I couldn't get to it. And then this year I I my room in uh Clinton Township it it was falling apart, and so I I I was quitting that and I knew it was I knew his time was coming to an end. I think those sirens got me. But yeah, no, so I just I I don't know. What I'm trying to say is I don't know. Something happened, my brain just glitched. Basically, you don't get anything you know, you don't get anything you want unless you ask for it. I went and I asked for it. And and Mike was kind enough to let me do it, is basically how it happened.

SPEAKER_09 17:19

Did you start their open mic there?

SPEAKER_03 17:21

Yeah, they hadn't had an open mic there uh since like pre-COVID, and they did it on the main stage on I think I don't know what night of the week, because I had never done it before. Um so yeah, I guess I did I started it there. It's been fun. We started it in June, and uh we're coming up on a year, so it's awesome.

SPEAKER_07 17:37

Dude, I I love doing that room. Like I j I mean, everyone that listens knows that I just started. Like I, you know, I'm like three months in. Right. But doing stands is like a treat. It's awesome. I appreciate it. It's like, oh, I get to do I get to eat cake today. Because like everyone there is there for comedy. Right. Like, you know.

SPEAKER_03 17:54

There's no TVs.

SPEAKER_07 17:55

There's no TV for real. There's no TVs, there's no bar in the room, it's low ceilings, it's dark, it's very intentional. Right.

SPEAKER_03 18:02

You're gonna have 20 people in that room and it it feels like 75 because of how tight and the low ceilings and how tight everybody's in there.

SPEAKER_07 18:09

Right, and everyone's locked into what the comic's talking about. The only lit up thing in the room is the comic, right?

SPEAKER_03 18:13

You know, and then it's nice because sometimes we get 40 people in there.

SPEAKER_07 18:16

Yeah, yeah, and it's fucking dude. The other night when fucking the doctor Bahu that guy sucked wax out of my ear, and then he fucking brings in a thousand people. How's he got so many fans? Fuck, that was awesome. Lots of surgeries. Yeah, that was fucking that was.

SPEAKER_09 18:34

He walked in and I was standing like by the door because I was trying to figure out what was going on because everybody was like moving because it wasn't wasn't in where it usually is because it all got moved to the main stage. And he walked by me, he goes, Hey, and I was like, Hi. Like, I'm like assuming he knows like he's seen clips of the podcast or something. But he's like, You're the bartender, right? And I was like, No. She's like a lot older than me.

SPEAKER_07 19:01

The bartender's a very nice lady, but she does not look alike at all. She's like, Don't guess. I want to guess, but she's a lot older than me. Yeah, she's not 29. Yeah, I was like, when she she came over to the table and told me that that happened, and I was like, Oh, he doesn't think you're the bartender. He's flirting. I was like, I have to. That's what Dylan does. I have to murder my ENT now. I have to fucking, I'm gonna tell him I got some fungus in my ear again, and then I'm gonna fucking Dylan was standing next to me when it happens.

SPEAKER_09 19:31

It happened, and he goes, I think he was flirting with you. I was like, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_07 19:35

I think he was just Dylan was so in his head that day. I I was like trying to talk him off a ledge.

SPEAKER_03 19:41

Like he was very Yeah, and I felt really bad having to cancel the short list that night, but things happened.

SPEAKER_07 19:46

It is what it is, man. It's yeah, like you you text me, and I appreciate you texting me, but like fucking like it's a show up, it was a show-up go-up. Like, or like we were trying to get the fucking, you know, the short whatever the fuck we call it. The uh short list short list. We were trying to get on the short list, and like that's like nobody's you can't go in expecting anything just because you're there. Right. It's you know, it's a lottery list and there's already fucking 15 people on, and then we combined headliner and open mic, so like you know, it was like you came over there.

SPEAKER_03 20:15

There wasn't enough time to go around it then.

SPEAKER_07 20:17

No, yeah. And so I was like, all right, let's just settle in and enjoy it. Fuck. I mean, we get to see Diane do the main stage, get to Mike Bonner, the 15 minutes. Yeah, that was awesome. Yeah, Mike Bonner's fucking hilarious, and then we get to say Garrett got to do the main stage. I was cool as fuck to see him do it. He's a he's a human pot of coffee. It's funny. Yeah, yeah, he is. He's he is the hardest working guy in the in comedy in Metro Detroit, I think.

SPEAKER_09 20:41

I mean that you've talked to.

SPEAKER_07 20:42

That I know anyway. Yeah, I mean like I've known in three months. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, yes, to be fair, yes. But like, I don't know if you've ever seen like the way he does he goes about his writing and everything he does is like it's like akin to like a beautiful mind, but like without the fucking crimes. But like, yeah, I mean he's got this fucking binder and he's got his note cards and he he listens back to his fucking he listens back to his sets and then he he he tallies how many laughs he got per second and then he highlights color-coded in a in a in a way to see like what how this went, how it didn't go, what he was expecting.

SPEAKER_03 21:22

I've never color coded, but I count laughs. I listen to every set. Yeah. Still I love it. You know, it's it's it's a it's a ever I'm just trying to get better all the time. Um you know, so you listening back to your set, if you don't do it, do it because you'll hear like in the you'll be kinda in the moment and come up with a tag that you didn't come up with before. And it it's a way to stay fresh.

SPEAKER_07 21:46

Oh yeah. Yeah, I yeah. In the in the see now I feel insecure because I'm like in my three months. But uh I'm teasing you. No, but uh I'm just not gonna talk about this. Let's talk about. Pipe fitting, you said you're such an expert on everything. No, uh listen, no, for sure for listening back to all the sets that I've recorded. Um the the thing that I found is that like I'll have a my perception of what's happening in the room is never accurate. Like when like I'll do the set and it'll be done, and I'm like, oh okay, so like what I think went well, and like I'll I'll listen back to the set, and I'm like, oh, that like killed the fucking momentum, and I had to like recover from that thing that I think is the funniest joke. Right. Like last night I did that joke about um like thinking Paige's mom was hot, and then I'm like, oh, I found out she was 16 in that album. I've never wanted to Bud Dwyer myself harder. When I listened back to the set, no one laughed at the Bud Dwyer part. I was like, did everyone not see that video of Bud Dwyer blowing his head off? Like, oh my, should I have said Kirk Cobain? Should I not do that joke at all? I didn't know what that meant. I assumed, but I didn't know. Yeah. So I'm like, all right. So I think I think that joke's fucking hysterical.

SPEAKER_03 23:04

It is. It it it's just sometimes you gotta present it to them in a way that's just so obvious.

SPEAKER_07 23:10

Yeah. It's so I'm probably gonna change if I keep I'm gonna try the suicide angle again, but do it with someone like fucking. I've never wanted to Chris Cornell myself more. Right. I've never wanted to Anthony Bourdain myself. I thought the Bud Dwyer was like the biggest, but maybe it's because I saw it when I was like 10. Right. And like it's fucking very etched in my mind. Seeing him like, Bud no!

SPEAKER_03 23:34

That's a rough one.

SPEAKER_07 23:35

It's a fucking brutal one. I don't know who that is. He's a politician that got he was the Pennsylvania? Oh shit, I don't know where he was I don't know where he was from, but he in 87 he was I think he was uh getting charged with some kind of I don't know um corruption and he was I think he was I think he had to report himself to jail in like a couple of days. So he did a he held a press conference and he hands a manila envelope to one person, hands a manila envelope to another person. So he's like handing out like suicide notes, but no one knows that because he's handing them envelopes for his family, for his kids, or whatever, and then he pulls out the last manila envelope and it's got a pistol in it, and all the reporters are like, Bud, no, no, no, no, no. And he goes, Oh, and blows his head off. And you can watch him do it. Yeah, and he falls and then blood pours out of his nose and mouth for a long time. It's fucking I saw that when I was like 10 years old.

SPEAKER_03 24:31

There was that newswoman that did it too.

SPEAKER_07 24:33

A newswoman killed herself?

SPEAKER_03 24:35

Right on the air, yeah. It was like in the 90s.

SPEAKER_07 24:37

Dude, let's watch it. Fuck the podcast. Let's go on rotten.com and just like get sad.

SPEAKER_09 24:44

Why would you want to watch that?

SPEAKER_07 24:46

What do you jerk off to? I'm just kidding. Not answering that. I know my answer. It's your mom. Your mom was out as fuck when she was 16. You gotta leave out that she was 16.

SPEAKER_03 25:03

I know. You might want to just say she was 18.

SPEAKER_07 25:06

No, no, I'm I gotta tell the truth. I gotta tell the truth. Uh, I'm just kidding. A little bit. I this that whole bit is truth. Like that whole thing is real. I fucking uh I was like, we were we were going through her aunt's photo album, and I was like, that's your mom.

unknown 25:28

Damn.

SPEAKER_09 25:29

No, we're walking through the grocery store after we left my aunt's house, and he goes, dude, your mom was hot. I was like, what?

SPEAKER_03 25:37

It was like on his mind hours later.

SPEAKER_07 25:43

I was like, damn, dude. Like, I was like, uh, I was like, uh like I kept like trying to start to tell her, and she's like, what? And I'm like, I I don't want you to fucking say anything, but dude, damn, you know.

SPEAKER_09 25:58

She's like and then she called me later, and he like in the background was like, oh, and Matt said, and Matt said. And I was like, You want me to tell her? Because I'll tell her. Rip the band-aid off.

SPEAKER_07 26:08

I wasn't going to, but I will. You were going to. It just it was a matter of time. And then her mom was like, Yeah, boys were lining up. I was like, I bet they were. You were not as fuck, dude. Oh, fucking hilarious. Um, it's gonna be weird seeing her dad next time. Oh.

SPEAKER_03 26:29

What's the next holiday? Memorial day?

SPEAKER_07 26:31

Yeah, I'm gonna avoid it. Whatever it is, I'm not gonna be there. I'm gonna have some kind of obligation. Oh, I have to work. Oh no. Unacceptable. Oh, dude, whatever. She's like, she was like, you know what? How would you feel if I said your dad was hot and she couldn't even get this sentence out before she drive?

SPEAKER_05 26:53

She was like, what if I said your dad?

SPEAKER_07 26:57

He was not. He was not. He looked like me, so he was. So he was not hot. He was not. That's fucking rude. That's fucking me. That's mean, dude. I'm kidding.

SPEAKER_03 27:09

Tell us how you really feel.

SPEAKER_07 27:10

Oh, I know how she feels. It's fucking hot. Is it hot in here? Am I just saucy? It could be both.

SPEAKER_03 27:16

Oh, eating low blood sugar.

unknown 27:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 27:19

Oh, man. What?

SPEAKER_09 27:21

Did you say low blood sugar?

SPEAKER_07 27:23

Are you diabetic? No. That's riveting radio. You just never know. Let's check your A1C. Actually, whenever we have guests on, we check our, we check their fucking A1Cs. Dude, uh I saw that you and uh Bill Bushart and uh Oh, Ree Lead Better? Lee Redbetter. Those were the wrong order. Lee Redbetter. Yellow lead better is gonna fucking make me cry. You guys have a show coming up. Where are you guys doing that show at?

SPEAKER_03 27:55

Uh it's at uh Shields uh Pizza in Troy on uh May 7th. It's a Thursday night. Um I just locked that venue down. Uh I was really excited about it. I got Bill on it, and everybody knows Bill's awesome. Yeah, Re's one of my good friends. Um and then it we're gonna do a pizza buffet and a comedy show. The pizza buffet pizza buffet is gonna start at like 5 45, go to about 7 o'clock, and then I'll take the stage as the host. And uh, you know, real re'll be the middle, and Bill's gonna close it down. Really excited about it.

SPEAKER_07 28:23

Yeah. I didn't know you, I didn't know you and Bill knew each other. Oh, yeah. It's kind of like a fun crossover, like, oh, this is like a sitcom crossover. I didn't know these guys knew each other. This is awesome. I just did uh I did his one-on-one class. Yeah, it's fucking awesome. It's uh I mean, for what you're paying for, it's value way more valuable than what you pay for.

SPEAKER_03 28:41

I never took Bill's class because I was just open micing for so long, but I did take Joel's class.

SPEAKER_07 28:45

Is that uh Ann Arbor?

SPEAKER_03 28:47

No, Joel's the advanced class at the Comedy Castle.

SPEAKER_07 28:49

Oh, oh, right on. Yeah, yeah. He's starting in like a week, the advance, and I can't do it because we're going on vacation, unfortunately. So I have to wait for the next one. Right. But yeah, dude, Bill's uh Bill's great, man. He had some great advice. We I mean basically in the 101 class, you you you basically just go up and do your sets, and then he will just the most ruthlessly honest heckler. What are you talking about? Why do you have so many words? Why did it take you 400 words to get to the point here? You could this could have just been A and B. You know, and it's it's invaluable. I mean, yeah, I Bill's.

SPEAKER_03 29:24

This is the best advice you can get.

SPEAKER_07 29:26

Yeah, oh yeah, to be efficient and get to the fucking point. I can't tell you how many open micers you see.

SPEAKER_03 29:32

I get bored quick.

SPEAKER_07 29:33

Yeah, yeah. I mean, you gotta land your fucking plane. You're not you're not doing a diatribe. You're you're trying to make people giggle, you know.

SPEAKER_03 29:39

That too, you confuse people when you use so many words because they think other words trigger different thoughts in their brain and they they're not actually listening to what you're talking about. At least that happens to me when people do it.

SPEAKER_07 29:51

Yeah, yeah, yeah. For that's how my I think anyone who's into comedy is kind of fucking stupid, like we like we are. So, yeah, for sure. Like so whenever, yeah, yeah. When when somebody's telling a long, fucking winded bit, my brain starts trailing off of oh, you could have gone, where are you going? Are you gonna go here? Are you gonna go here? And then I'm like, oh, I'm totally missed what they're fucking talking about. But yeah, they uh I mean they say like a perplexed audience is not a laughing audience. So if you got this long ass story where you're not punching it up trying to get them laughing the whole time, it's just gonna be like And the laugh has to be big enough at the end if you're gonna do that. Yeah, which it almost never is when someone does it, you know. I mean you have to be a fucking pro to do it. Well, it's an open mic too. Yeah, right. So if you have five minutes, you're gonna spend your five minutes doing a fucking three-minute dad joke, you know. Right, you're gonna do the you're gonna do the Norm McDonald fucking moth thing, you know, for your full five minutes. No, you're not gonna do that, you know. You try to get a hundred fucking laughs in that five minutes.

SPEAKER_03 30:52

I think I did the same, like one time I did the same 16 words for five minutes. Why? Just to do it.

SPEAKER_07 31:04

Dude, I was like when we walked into the open mic last night, I was like, there's a keyboard and a guitar. I'm like, what the fuck's happening to this club?

SPEAKER_03 31:11

Yeah, no, I think I'd only brought my guitar one time to the open mic because I usually close my sets with it whenever I'm performing. Okay. Uh so I I think I'm gonna bring a theme a theme song to it and and and just do make it different for a little while. Yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_07 31:29

It was dude, it was it was funny. It was funny, the pink pony club. Yeah, so that's funny.

SPEAKER_03 31:33

I wrote that about my old dive bar east side show, that Grashet Pub. And uh I was I didn't know how it would go over it at one night stands, but it it I it was fun.

SPEAKER_07 31:43

Was it where were you doing it at?

SPEAKER_03 31:44

What was it was called or it was called Grashet Pub at the time, and then it they it got sold. Now it's called Jack's Pub.

SPEAKER_07 31:50

Oh, I don't know where that's at.

SPEAKER_03 31:51

I think 14 and a half mile of Grashet.

SPEAKER_07 31:53

See, I th I feel like you told me this before or said something about it before because I thought you were talking about dually's and you just weren't name-dropping it.

SPEAKER_03 31:59

No, no. But I did I was uh I think I I was I hosted a show at Dooleys briefly before they closed down.

SPEAKER_07 32:05

Yeah. Oh yeah, I heard they uh someone got killed there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 32:09

A couple people. A couple people at different times.

SPEAKER_07 32:11

Oh I was like, at once?

unknown 32:13

Holy fuck.

SPEAKER_07 32:14

But the uh the the one that shut it down was that the security guard got killed, right? Yeah, oh that's that place. Yeah, it's insane. That's where I had my channel. We'll leave that alone. I'm gonna leave that alone. Uh that's where I had my 21st birthday, dude. And uh I was drug out of there. Oh I was drug out of there and thrown into the back of an 89 Bronco. And then I woke up and I was mad. I was like, where the fuck is you ever where why am I in here? It was my own car.

SPEAKER_09 32:49

Sounds like a good 21st birthday.

SPEAKER_07 32:50

Dude, yours what what's your uh 20? No, no, that wasn't your 21st birthday, it's your 19th birthday. I want you to tell that story to everybody because it's hilarious.

SPEAKER_09 32:58

I'm not telling that on the air.

SPEAKER_07 33:00

I'm telling I'll tell it for you then.

SPEAKER_09 33:01

No, please don't.

SPEAKER_07 33:03

You've already told it on the air. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_09 33:05

No, I have not.

SPEAKER_07 33:07

Okay, so here's this anonymous person who went to Canada to drink on her 19th birthday. And they were trying to kick her out because she was done, and she's like, I'm just sitting here drinking my water. What the fuck's your problem? Just let me drink my water. And what this random anonymous person didn't know is that she had thrown up into her cup and was drinking her puke.

SPEAKER_03 33:35

I feel bad for that person.

SPEAKER_09 33:37

I don't think she was actually drinking it. I think she just tried to say that she was sitting there drinking her colorful water.

SPEAKER_07 33:46

That stringy fucking toilet water. That's so bad. Oh, dude. Oh, that's so great. I just grossed myself out.

SPEAKER_03 33:54

I think I'm gonna throw up.

SPEAKER_07 33:55

I'm sorry. It's open. Oh, dude, I puked at work for the first time ever. I've lied about puking at work a thousand times. But I but it really happened. I actually puked for the first at work for the first time in my life. What was that last week? Was that last week or two weeks ago?

SPEAKER_09 34:14

Yeah, last week as uh last.

SPEAKER_07 34:16

Yeah, whatever. I guess it doesn't matter. But I was like, never happened before in my life. I was I was just staying, I was bending over a print table, looking at the print, trying to figure out where we're going next, and I was just like, I had just had this like I felt like I had phlegm on my like uvula, you know. That's how I feel right now. Yeah, you're talking too much about puke. So anyway, there I was. Dude, I never I I'd never puked at work, but I don't I can't remember last time I puked sober before that. I can't I can't remember. I I fight it with every ounce of energy in my body.

SPEAKER_03 34:51

I woke up in the middle of the night, like and uh it was a couple like a last month or two months ago, just puking my brains out though, just completely sober. It was lasted 12 12 hours and I was fine. I hate puking.

SPEAKER_07 35:02

Oh dude, I'll I'll fight it with everything I got. I I can't stand it. I can't stand I would rather feel like absolute shit than throw up once. I I can't stand the feeling of it. It's the worst. Oh. I did I did puke sober recently. Your dad's jerky.

SPEAKER_03 35:21

I was really gonna be pissed off. It was too spicy for him. Oh, it was too spicy. Like the fireball?

SPEAKER_06 35:26

No, you my wife's hot. My wife's hot? You can't like you don't like my fruit? You son of a bitch! I I brought your kids into my house.

SPEAKER_09 35:34

My dad makes really good jerky match, just dramatic, but he was eating it and then it got too spicy and he um I don't know. It wasn't the spicy. He threw up.

SPEAKER_03 35:41

It's not a rough puke, the the jerky puke, the nice uh the dry heave almost like it was okay.

SPEAKER_07 35:48

His his jerky, I gotta backpedal. His jerky is really good. And it was not the jerky, it was just I was sick and I didn't know it yet, and I ate some of his jerky and then I screamed it out of me. And what does she say when I come out of the bathroom? Are you alright? What happened? Are you are you not are you not feeling well? No. I walk out of the bathroom, like, oh my god. She's like, You're an inconsiderate puker. It was so loud. Inconsiderate puker. That's the most asinine insult I've ever heard in my life. Be quieter. Oh, I'm sorry. Let me just next next time I need to scream the my innards out, I'll just go and just I can't even brush my teeth without doing that.

SPEAKER_03 36:32

I'm a gagger, man. You just made it move. 5 a.m. the family sleep and I'm heading for work, brushing my teeth, waking them all up.

SPEAKER_07 36:44

Fucking gagging in the mirror because you're brushing your teeth. Oh, dude. Oh man, we're just going down the puke stories. I threw up because I used to brush my teeth in my work truck almost exclusively. I don't I like I never had time in the morning, so I was like, I'll just keep a toothbrush in my work truck. And I was I was on Woodward heading to one of the properties I worked at in Royal Oak, and I was brushing my teeth. What is that? No, I wasn't on Woodward, wherever that fucking McDonald's is and that like Vidock or whatever. I guess that doesn't really matter. But this see, this is about getting efficient with comedy. So there I was where Jessica lost her sweater. But I but I was sitting at a light brushing my teeth, and I was like, oh no. And I opened up my door and threw up out the door, closed the door, and I was like, I wonder what that looks like to everyone around me. Like, there's no way they're thinking I'm brushing my teeth, and I went a little too deep. Right. They're all thinking I'm some fucking scumbag who's like drunk and in in traffic. Yeah. Oh, dude. You got any good puke stories other than you trying to drink your own puke?

SPEAKER_03 37:50

That one tops all of ours.

SPEAKER_09 37:53

I puked after we got through border the border too. We were on the way back from that trip, and I was like sitting there just trying to hold it together so that we could get through the through the border, get back into the States, and they're like asking us all these questions and whatever, and we get through, and I just start throwing up all over my lap. Well, no, I had a bag, but the bag had a hole in it.

SPEAKER_07 38:16

Jeez.

SPEAKER_09 38:17

So it went all over me.

SPEAKER_07 38:20

What was it, a bag of milk from Canada?

SPEAKER_09 38:23

No, it was just like a grocery bag that had a hole in it.

SPEAKER_07 38:28

I'm sorry. My apologies.

SPEAKER_09 38:31

I know.

SPEAKER_03 38:31

No, it was just a great. Now you mentioned milk, I'm really gonna throw up.

SPEAKER_07 38:35

So there it was, puking up milk. And dude, my okay. We can we don't have to do this forever, but why is this the top one?

SPEAKER_09 38:43

Well, it's happened. He's literally unwell.

SPEAKER_07 38:45

Am I making you feel sick? I got okay. Okay. So here I'm gonna Okay, all right. Wrap it up. All right, this is the last one. I swear to God, this is the last one. This is where Charles pukes. This is the word this is the last one. Me and my me and my buddy used to take turns blacking out when we were like 18. We'd be like, oh, it's my turn, and then like one of us gets to be an absolute fucking animal and the other one has to like keep it tame. Which never really worked out. We both just got obliterated, just one would almost die. And uh so I am fucking it was my turn. I was obliterated drunk. And and Devin's driving us home. It was me, Austin, and Devin, I think. And Devin's driving us home, and Devin's driving like he drives, like a fucking douchebag. And I'm like, I'm just gonna go. And it's it had to have been February or something. We were out by Mount Holly, and I stick my head out the window and I just I just let it lose. And he's like, What the fuck, dude? You're gonna get like like we're the only car on the road and we're like teenagers and we're all drunk. Like the fucking puking out of the side of the car is not a good look. We gotta fucking, you know. So he pulls over uh into a gas station and he's like, we gotta just like fucking like reset for a minute, get the shit cleaned off the the car, and you know, because he's like he's scared that we're all gonna get arrested now, because now there's a reason to pull us over. And so I go inside and I'm I'm I'm obliterated, I'm bouncing off the shelves and shit, knocking stuff down. I go to grab like a Gatorade or whatever, and I I buy it and I come out and it's just icicles frozen to the side of it, frozen to the side of his jeep. And he's like, What the fuck, dude? And so I took one, I took one of those fucking the window uh washer things that are always at the gas station, and I'm trying to like I'm trying to like scrape it off, and it's not scraping because it's soft. So I like I'm like, alright, so I turn around and I start slopping it, so now it's just like melting, and like and he's and we're all just like this is the stupidest. But then we found the ice scraper in his car and just you know, and just spraying fucking pukicles all over the ground.

SPEAKER_09 40:55

Are you done?

SPEAKER_07 40:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can move on. I wasn't planning on this. Next topic shit in your pants.

SPEAKER_06 41:02

Yeah you this was gross.

SPEAKER_07 41:04

Haven't done that yet.

SPEAKER_03 41:06

I mean, if you want to talk about that, Matt's got a few of those stories. I got I got one. You have IBS 2?

SPEAKER_07 41:12

I there's two of them. There's like a type two, a one a one that you're born with and then one that you develop by being a piece of shit. Uh do you have any shitting yourself stories? I'm down. I'm down for all the gross.

SPEAKER_09 41:26

Oh, I've never shit myself.

SPEAKER_07 41:28

I have.

SPEAKER_09 41:30

I know.

SPEAKER_07 41:31

Have I told you that story? I gotta keep more secrets. A hundred times. But the funniest part about that story is calling my brother and telling him that it happened. And he goes, You shit yourself in your yard? I go, yeah. He goes, Your yard's right next to your house. Why didn't you just go inside? Couldn't. Couldn't. It was just immediate, and there was no fucking, there was just nothing I could do to stop it. It's like the number one job as an adult is don't shit your pants. And I failed. I failed one day.

SPEAKER_09 42:02

Anyway, what's your day job?

SPEAKER_07 42:07

Oh no, no, no, no, don't tell me. Because this is a game that we play. Okay. This is a game where we play, because we interview we we have a bunch of fucking like small, you know, artists come on, so musicians, comedians, whatever. So we should do it like 20 do it like a 20 questions. I'll try to figure it out. Is it a trade?

SPEAKER_03 42:27

Yes.

SPEAKER_07 42:28

Yes. And you're you you're in Farmington Hills. So you're not, but you used to be an e-sider. Are you a machinist?

SPEAKER_01 42:38

Yes.

SPEAKER_07 42:38

Fuck yeah! It was three. That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_03 42:44

Yeah, it's pretty good.

SPEAKER_07 42:45

Fuck yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:47

So I knew you were gonna get it quick the second it was a trade.

SPEAKER_07 42:52

Hell yeah. Five access or just three.

SPEAKER_03 42:54

Three access? Fucking bum. No, I know I don't care. They pay me. Check clears.

SPEAKER_07 43:00

Fucking there's so many more accesses.

SPEAKER_03 43:02

I I get to program all three too.

SPEAKER_07 43:04

Oh, hell yeah. Well, alright. All right. You don't have to throw it on the table to show me how big it is.

SPEAKER_09 43:10

That's what Chris does, right?

SPEAKER_07 43:12

That is that is what Chris does, yeah. He's a five-axis machinist. But he uh so two more, you know?

SPEAKER_03 43:18

It's a lot more.

SPEAKER_07 43:19

So many more. Yeah 66% more. So are you so okay? So my my brother's a machinist. He's been a machinist for 15 years, but he's a job hopper because he's an emotional bitch. And because of that, he's had to work the fucking graveyard shift for 15 years. That's rough. Have you uh are you are you on the rare day shift guy?

SPEAKER_03 43:44

No, I'm the uh I've always yeah, I guess I've always been on that. I've never had to work afternoons ever. Really? Yeah, I've been pretty lucky like that. Small mom and pop shops that didn't have second shifts mostly.

SPEAKER_07 43:53

Oh, right on.

SPEAKER_03 43:54

So I've I was it's been right easy. Yeah. And most of my time working there, I've been there for 14 years. Years now. And uh most of it's only 40 hours. I don't we don't work overtime. We we service our production uh lines. We have we have uh uh line dies in another build in another building that that we that that run, and when parts need to be replaced, we just service them, repair them.

SPEAKER_07 44:17

I think I might know where you work. I'm gonna write it down. I'm not gonna say it. I'm gonna write it down. You tell me if I'm right. Okay. Just because I'm a pipe fitter, so I get to peek my head behind the curtain of like every place.

SPEAKER_09 44:34

You think he's gonna be able to read that?

SPEAKER_07 44:36

For sure. He knows Dr. Bahu.

SPEAKER_03 44:42

I fucker forgot to write me a prescription before he left. No, no, I don't work there.

SPEAKER_07 44:47

Damn it! All right. Oh, I guess those aren't small mom and pop shops. You fucking okay. Yeah, I'm more on. I'm an idiot. It's fine. Uh yeah, dude, yeah, that is very rare though. Not working overtime and not.

SPEAKER_03 45:05

Monday through Thursday is the perfect comedy job.

SPEAKER_07 45:08

That's fucking we worked four tens last week. I wish I could do that for the rest of my career. It's the perfect shift.

SPEAKER_03 45:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 45:14

Three-day weekend. You still like we worked six to four and last week. We worked six to four, it had three days off. It's fucking perfect.

SPEAKER_03 45:22

The challenge is too often Friday becomes a waste day for me. Oh. Because it's like, I don't have to do shit. Yeah. And then Saturday rolls around and everybody else is home, so you gotta get stuff done. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 45:36

Yeah, but having that data fucking, you know, kids are at school, wife's at work, or whatever, and then you get to, you know, whatever, watch Better Call Saul for a couple hours and just like enjoy yourself.

SPEAKER_03 45:46

Yeah. That's a Red Dead Redemption.

SPEAKER_07 45:48

Hell yeah. Dude, Red Dead Redemption almost well, I ended up we ended up breaking up anyway, but that almost caused a breakup. I was so into that game. I was like skipping dinners and shit.

SPEAKER_03 45:59

I just finished it for the fourth time. I I can't stop it.

SPEAKER_05 46:02

Dude.

SPEAKER_07 46:03

My uh I wonder if you so I wonder if you've done the same thing. The train, if you stop it in the tunnel.

SPEAKER_03 46:10

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. The cops can't find or the marshals can't find you.

SPEAKER_07 46:15

Yeah. We're gonna get real dark, dude. I I used to skip dinners, I wasn't hanging out with my kids. It was a problem. That game is a fucking just a couple of months ago.

SPEAKER_03 46:23

There was a uh there was a new Easter egg that was discovered on it with this like spider on the map. It that it the developers said they they didn't think anyone would ever ever start putting these clues together, but I don't know how far it's gonna go. But it's like crazy that what 10 years later, yeah, people are still finding Easter eggs within the game.

SPEAKER_07 46:43

Dude, that game is so immersive and fun, it's insane. I can't I can't believe how much fun I would have playing that game. I like don't play video games at all anymore because I'm I don't have an off switch with anything that I like. So like if I start getting obsessed with something, it's like you're not gonna see me for a while, you know.

SPEAKER_03 46:58

True. I but then my attention span has changed a lot as I've gotten older too, and I can't sustain like first person shooters for a very long time anymore. It's just too much action. Yeah, and I I get like all over stimulated. Yeah, I'm an old man about it now.

SPEAKER_07 47:16

Dude, I just let me play some golf. I tell you what, literally, yeah, that's like my fucking new thing. But uh I was just having this thought and I wanted to start writing about it because I'm I re-watch shows, but I re-watch them so far apart in years that I it's like I'm watching it from a whole new perspective. Like, you know, I I watched Better Call Soul and it was brand new, but I was like 19 when it was coming out, you know. And I hated it a lot of it because it's so boring and dry, but I didn't understand like all of the things that were being implied. And now that I'm re-watching it as a fucking 32-year-old man, I'm like, this is so d like, oh my god, this is so good. But I it's yeah, I I don't know if I could fucking play half the video games that I used to play because of the way my brain is now. I'm like, I just don't care. Like, I right, you know, I wish I did, but I don't I don't have any fucking time, you know.

SPEAKER_03 48:08

I can't sit down and play Madden for three days straight.

SPEAKER_07 48:11

No, no, fuck no. I dude, I used I mean we have a PlayStation here. I don't know why. We're never gonna turn it on. Maybe if we have the kids up here, we'll turn it on. But like I used to play like the the skateboarding games for like like I'd play like Tony Hawk Underground for ten hours a day for like the entire summer, and I would be mad when I had to go eat because it was like, oh, I should be doing this, you know. You eat yes. I would be mad. Okay, let me repeat.

SPEAKER_03 48:39

I lose weight when I play video games, I just skip meals.

SPEAKER_07 48:42

I I literally used to well, I would gain weight when I played video games though, because I would just like my parents would be like, oh, come, you know, come eat dinner, and I'm like, I don't want to eat chicken and broccoli, I could just eat Doritos and like stay where I'm at, you know. And then so I'd gain a bunch of get all fat and fucking frumpy, just working these guys out.

SPEAKER_03 48:59

You dehydrated because you haven't gotten up to get anything to drink.

SPEAKER_07 49:02

Just been drinking code red for three weeks straight, you know.

SPEAKER_09 49:06

That's where all of your problems have stemmed from.

SPEAKER_07 49:08

From code red?

SPEAKER_09 49:10

From playing video games and getting fat and drinking no water.

SPEAKER_07 49:15

You don't have to get so real.

SPEAKER_03 49:17

I keep bringing up the water on purpose.

SPEAKER_07 49:20

Dude, I've a I I've I have a that you hydrated. Dude, I have the anxiety bit talking about like all of my anxiety issues are because I don't drink any water. And it's real. Like I literally called an ambulance because I thought I was having a hard time.

SPEAKER_03 49:32

It's totally real.

SPEAKER_09 49:33

And it was just because he was dehydrated.

SPEAKER_07 49:34

It was because I was dehydrated. But I was but for a for like a few weeks, my the straw came out. Gross. Uh for a few weeks my my heart rate would be like disproportionate to what I was doing. Like I'd be walking on a flat surface, my heart rate be like 180. I'm like, this is it, like I walk all day every day. I'm a pipe fitter. I walk all day, every day. I should not even I shouldn't even be breaking 100. Right. You know what I mean? And I was driving home with the kids. Uh we lived up in Holly at the time, and the kids are just doing normal kids shit. Hey dad, don't forget this, and dad, don't do this. And like me and my daughter's got speech impediments, we're like working on R words or whatever. And R words. Yeah, she says we taught it. And sorry, she hates that word. Not as much as the other word I say with R and M.

SPEAKER_09 50:32

Turmeric? Turmeric, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 50:35

Yeah, yeah, that's the word. You fucking done you steal my fucking bits. Uh but like, but like it just got to me. Like the kids fucking all kind of coming at me at once, and I was like, all right, enough guys, like just chill out. We got like five minutes left. Fucking just stare out the windows, no more talking. I need a minute. And then it was just like my hands like did this, and I was like, what the fuck? You know, and I'm like, and then I look at my watch, and my watch says like my heart rate's like 215, 217, 220, and it's staying at 220. And I'm like, what the fuck? So I called an ambulance. I thought I was having a heart attack. I scared the shit out of my kids. I'm like, I'm having a heart attack. You know, so they just like start hysterically crying because I'm on I have a pickup truck, so like I I have an Android Auto or whatever, so I called 911 on the radio. So I'm like, I'm having a heart attack, and they're like, okay, the ambulance is on the way. And uh yeah, I spent three days on a cardiology floor. They couldn't find a single thing wrong with me. Like they had me do a stress test, they did uh EKG, they did a uh ultrasound of my heart, like you know, everything is fine, but I'm like, so why the fuck is my heart beating out of my chest like this? And they didn't they couldn't give me an answer. And then we talked about it, and I Googled all my symptoms, and I chat GPT'd all my symptoms, and it was like, all right, if I focus on hydration, let's see if it changes. And it did. So it's like, motherfucker, like all of this because I don't drink water.

SPEAKER_03 52:04

My wife's sick of heard me tell her to drink water. She doesn't drink water, she doesn't, but I it's just my go-to.

SPEAKER_07 52:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_09 52:11

I drink like a gallon a day, at least. Unnecessary.

SPEAKER_03 52:14

I've drinked it not like I don't even know if that's enough.

SPEAKER_09 52:18

Like that's the minimum minimum. I have a gallon a week.

SPEAKER_07 52:21

I drink a gallon a week. There's no way. This one a day. I don't have time to pee all day. Right. It's fucking but then again, my piss comes out this color. So that's that's why I like it so much. Maybe my piss is exclusively fireball. That's the fucking problem.

SPEAKER_03 52:41

Yeah, there's like back pressure when I be it's like dribbles out like a maple tree.

SPEAKER_07 52:52

Oh, dude. I don't know. I need to get better about drinking water. I I have these seasons now that I have like addressed this problem. I like, I'll do really good and then I do fucking terrible. And then I do really good and then do fucking terrible. And I'm like, I'll call her and I'm like, I'm just having a bad day. I'm anxious as fuck. And she's like, Have you drank any water? I'm like, we don't have to talk about that. I'm just sad. I'm gonna go take a bath when I get home.

SPEAKER_03 53:15

I'll soak in the water. Not gonna drink it though. I'm not gonna drink water osmosis.

SPEAKER_07 53:23

Like a sponge, dude. Yeah, that's real. All of that is real.

SPEAKER_09 53:27

I literally will if that worked where you could just take it in through your skin, you'd be the most hydrated person there is.

SPEAKER_07 53:33

Only bathe like once a month, and it's because I'm anxious as fuck. That's a that's another fucking bit that I'm working on.

SPEAKER_03 53:41

Nice hot, relaxing bath. No shame.

SPEAKER_07 53:45

Yeah. The I that's another bit I'm working on. It's like, you know how bad it has to be for like a blue-collar guy, a pipe fitter, to go have a soak because he's scared? It's fucking so stupid. I'm scared. I'm gonna go put on Dave Matthews over my speaker and fucking sit in the water. Maybe I'll turn on the jets and light a candle. Oh no. Maybe she'll catch me ferociously beating it again. Oh, was I not supposed to tell that? Are we liars on this podcast?

SPEAKER_09 54:18

I'm sorry. I don't care what you say.

SPEAKER_07 54:21

But you didn't want me to tell the you drinking puke story. Well, you do care what I say. There's so many things I can say. Like immediately off the top of my head was like, what can I get away with right now? And she said I could say whatever I want. God damn it. They're looking for me.

SPEAKER_09 54:38

You're naughty. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 54:42

Dude, uh I so I always want to, I always anytime we have comics on, I want to pick their brain because I'm new at this, and I'm like I'm trying, like I feel like I'm in an uh an apprenticeship all over again. Which sucks. I like being new at something, but I don't like not having the information yet. The uh so I read the comedy bible.

SPEAKER_03 55:01

Right.

SPEAKER_07 55:02

And it seems like it's excellent, but I feel like there's some shit in there that I like don't necessarily agree with. Like she says, like, thou shalt work clean. I'm like, fuck that. Like some stuff just doesn't work clean, you know.

SPEAKER_03 55:16

No, not not not not everything. Yeah. It it's it and clean is the hard it's hard to write clean. Um I wouldn't stress about it. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 55:25

But she like in in there, she she almost makes it seem like you will not work until you're a unless you become a big name, unless you can work clean.

SPEAKER_03 55:34

And I'm like it's a it's the easier path to work you'll get more work, the you know, being cleaner or not you don't even have to be clean. I think that it's just not vulgar, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_07 55:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 55:46

Not that in my opinion matters, but I I don't know if I can do it.

SPEAKER_07 55:52

I was talking to Kate today about this. I'm like, I don't know if I can ever I can I don't know if I can do it. Like I don't I don't filter myself in front of my grandma. I don't know if I could I don't know if I could get on stage and never say fuck.

SPEAKER_03 56:02

You know? Right, because there's a lot of venues that um not every venue is different. Like I worked so hard at becoming like the c a club level or a club style comedy comedian that every once in a while, like I'd I'd go work a a dive bar. Excuse me, it's a little rowdier than you know, a club or you know, and it is they're all there for comedy, but it's just a different you know, it's just a rowdier crowd. And every once in a while it's just that the comedy style they they wanted a dirtier, more raw experience than what I was giving them. Yeah because I was working that cleaner angle for so long that I was where I I don't know what I'm trying to say. I don't know anything. I don't know anything about comedy. In my mind, you're an authority in it because I'm fucking I'm so new. I don't know anything, man. I'm I'm figuring it out as I go.

SPEAKER_07 56:52

Yeah. I mean that's the fun of it though, right? That's the fucking the side quest that just feels so bad.

SPEAKER_03 56:56

Stupid giving advice. That's like who the fuck am I?

SPEAKER_07 57:02

Yeah. I I dude, I I don't know if I could ever do it. I I just don't know if I could I don't know if I could do it. Like just the premises that I have don't even like they they're I couldn't give my premises to a guy like Nate Bargati and be like, like how do you like how could you go about talking about he's and that's a bad example because he's like one of the greatest right now, but but like a guy who works completely clean, like could you take a premise about like hey, I'm monozempic, but I smoke weed? Make something funny about that, you know, like can you weed is clean. So what is clean then? Because like I'm picturing like TG.

SPEAKER_03 57:40

There's uh watch a show on watch any uh TV show on channel or whatever, like on regular TV, like channel 50 or something, whatever that they run reruns on. Anything they talk about on that, King of Queens, they're they talk about drugs, they talk about sex, they but they do it in a tasteful way, and that's the difference between clean comedy and not clean comedy. Now then there's church clean, which is no drugs, no sex, no violence, yeah, no suicide. Like none of those fun things to talk about.

SPEAKER_07 58:11

That's one joke. That's one of my jokes, right?

SPEAKER_03 58:14

So there's that level, you know, and that's like dry bar comedy level. They don't allow any of that stuff. But there's there's it's all different levels. There's you know, I I I think the wheelhouse if to write in is just write PG 13 and limit your F words. Yeah. And I think that's the best way to go. The intentional ones, you know, make sure they count when you say them. And if you use them overbearingly, they lose it, they lose the flavor, they lose the punch.

SPEAKER_07 58:40

Yeah, Kate was telling me that today. She watched uh don't use them as filler words, yeah. And I have a that is my um, yeah. I'll be like fucking so you know, and uh, but Kate was telling me last night, because she she I I recruit I had my showcase at uh Mark Ridley's and so I sent her the video and she was like, You're talking too fast, you gotta like let people laugh. You're trying to get too much out, and then you know, don't say fuck so much. Right.

SPEAKER_09 59:07

Well, she also gets told that all of my family functions. Yeah, I do but now it's coming from a comedian, and he's like, Oh yeah, maybe I do say it a lot. Yeah, I respect her. No, I'm just kidding.

SPEAKER_07 59:18

I'm kidding. Sorry. I respect her family's all plumbers. Fuck them. Yeah. I'm a pie fitter. No, I'm just kidding. The uh Yeah. I well, even like watching back clips of the podcast, or like I don't I don't watch the full episodes, but when when we when we edit the when we edit the clips and put out the clips, I'm like, god damn, like I really do say fuck constantly, don't I?

SPEAKER_03 59:46

Right. You know, get over it. Yeah, you know. Um like we were talking about like uh clean writing styles, though. The writing is still it's like a muscle just like anything else, you have to work on it. And the more you do it, and the more you like I had this aha moment where I wrote like my first what I consider to be my very first clean joke, and I was like, oh, I did it. Like it was I could take it anywhere, you know. And then I was really excited about it, but like the more you work on that, like if you're gonna talk about your kids or your day-to-day life in in it's just you just have to work it out just like anything else.

SPEAKER_07 1:00:24

Yeah. Yeah, the uh the I I think the most interesting part about doing this is watching back the sets, and you f when you hear it and you're trying to put yourself in the perspective of an audience member, you realize how much of the joke or how much of the writing is actually fluff, like it's completely unnecessary to the point. And it's I'll write something, I'm like, oh, this is fucking good, and then I'll perform it. I'm like, I wasted 45 seconds setting setting up a cheap joke, right?

SPEAKER_03 1:00:55

A cheap joke, and that that was something that hurt early on. Someone had told me to reach out to a comic, uh, to try to, you know, I think this guy will like you. And I I reached out to him and he was like, Can I call you? And uh he was like, That's basically what he said to me. He's like, You spoke for 45 seconds before you got to a pun.

SPEAKER_06 1:01:14

Yeah. Oh, to a pun.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:19

So yeah, you know, it hurts because it was a good joke. Yeah, and and then it was like, you made up that whole story just to fit that pun, which was not true either. There was a totally real story that I shoehorned a pun into.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:33

Yeah. But yeah, I mean, but if you you you're doing five or seven minute sets, you're like, what, you got five of those now? You you have five jokes in your fucking full set that you drove.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:44

Without a laugh leading into it.

SPEAKER_07 1:01:45

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and I mean, and I talked to psychos like Garrett, who's like, I'm trying to get a laugh every 12 seconds. I'm like, how do you do that?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:54

12's an eternity.

unknown 1:01:57

Is it?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:58

No, I I I think Is that a normal thing that aims for? You know, you're getting four or five laughs an hour or a minute at at twelve. That's that's good. Yeah. The greats are getting 10 plus.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:08

Per minute. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:10

I mean, not not the entire hour. Yeah. But when they are hitting and the crowd's laughing, yeah, they're getting a laugh every six seconds.

SPEAKER_07 1:02:16

That's one thing I I don't that's I mean, of course I'm working on fucking everything, but the the the thing that I feel like I'm lacking right now is wringing out a funny premise and just getting everything I can out of it. I'm not I'm not doing that yet. Now and when when I watch back my sets, I'm like, oh, like I had them going, and then I was like, all right, hard left. Now me let me start over with a new premise. And I'm seeing myself like I'm actually cutting off the audience from in laughing, which is the juice. That's the reason we're doing it. And I and I'm stopping them to re-establish a new premise. I'm like, I gotta stop just.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:51

Just give it a few seconds, yeah. Let the laughter die. That that and and embrace that silence because you're gonna have that silence in between jokes, or even if the laugh, even if you don't get the intended big laugh at the end of your joke, just let it hang. Yeah, you might get a late laugh that you didn't, and you stepped on it because you started talking. Yeah, and and once that late laugh comes, it can bring in more late laughs for the people that were uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_10 1:03:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:14

And then and then you let and if you don't get the laugh, all well, you hang out for a few seconds on stage and feel silly for a second. Yeah. And uh and then you then you get into your next joke. And that that time that that happens feels like a fucking eternity when you're up there. It feels like it's like 10, 15 seconds when you're when you're hanging up on something. But then when you go back and and listen to your tape or watch it, it was really like a second and a half.

SPEAKER_07 1:03:35

Isn't that insane? The time, the the way time feels when you're on stage is so different. Yeah. There's when when I watched back my showcase, I felt like I really took my time and I did not. Like I I I slowed down way more than I normally do on stage at the showcase. And there's no, I I have like I it's like I crammed like nine minutes into five minutes, and I'm just like assaulting the crowd with material instead of letting them enjoy it. And when I got off stage, Bill was like, Good job, but dude, you you fucking you let them breathe. Let them laugh with you. And then and then he also told me that I need to work on that. Was like all the Ozempic jokes that I'd I'd done at stands, and uh he's like, You gotta you have to establish that it's okay for people to laugh at you. I don't know why, but he's like, I can see that some people are uncomfortable. Like you need to be you need to do something to make people comfortable with that specific premise and be okay with laughing at you for being a fat ass, you know. But but yeah, I watching back that tape, I'm like, God, I was it's like I was coked up and I was actually drunk.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:43

Well, it's the the the the uh man, I'm losing my words today. Uh it's it's you're excited, that's all it is, yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_07 1:04:52

I mean, and that's the biggest crowd I've done.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:54

That was that was intimidating as shit that stage is the most intimidating stage I go on, so yeah. I every time I park my car, I walk up Troy Street and my knees shake, and I walk up to the door, I grab the wrong one every time I try to go in the right, but you can only go in the left and I feel insecure. Everybody's looking at me, see me do that, you know. So go sign the paper and I I drink my tequila.

SPEAKER_07 1:05:19

Yeah. Dude, that room is fucking. I mean, just I there's also like a weight of that room when you walk from like through the green room down the hallway and you see like all these signatures of like I mean, Dave Smith. I saw his signature.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:33

I'm like, fucking Dave Smith, dude, what that's crazy, right?

SPEAKER_03 1:05:36

Dave Tell and Well, there's a sense of like added pressure too for me, anyway, because you know, you I I work all over the place, and and the first thing anybody who knows me in my real life goes, Oh, when when's the next time you're gonna be at the comedy castle? And it those spots are few and far between. Yeah, and when you get them, they don't come anyway, but they always ask. So it's like in the back of your mind, like you'd like. To be able to tell them I'll be there, but you're not gonna be there, but I'll be there. Yeah, you know, it so it's and and I you know, and and growing up as a kid, everybody knew Mark Ridley's Comedy Castle. Yeah, and I think that was the the place to do comedy. But like so there's you know, you put a emphasis on it, or you put it up on a pedestal almost, you know. And and not that you know, I love working at one night stands, but it's just a different it's different, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:26

Yeah, it's different.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:27

It doesn't like uh what's the one in it's a different appeal to other people because they they don't even know like one night stands really it's a newer club, so they're unfamiliar with it.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:34

I dude, I lived on that city block for 15 years. I had no idea it was there until I mean probably around COVID. I like I went for a run and I was like comedy club? The fuck?

SPEAKER_03 1:06:46

Well that they just put that up there. Yeah. That that that comedy club sign was new this winter.

SPEAKER_07 1:06:51

I was gonna say they just put the yeah, and well, I mean the the fucking the the mark not the not the marquee sign, the or the the you're talking about the the small one up front, yeah, like the regular one.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:00

I thought you were talking about the top the one on top of the building.

SPEAKER_07 1:07:02

No, that I did notice too. That's fucking sweet. But uh no, I mean just the sign that says you know, one night stands comedy club.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:08

Shit, I drove there probably 30 times and passed it up every time.

SPEAKER_07 1:07:12

Yeah. Yeah, I had no idea. And like I'd I had been flirting, so I've been like I'm a lifelong fan of comedy, and I've been flirting with starting comedy for I mean since I was like seven, sixteen, seventeen years old. Like I found an old laptop when I was in my like when I was like 25, I found an old laptop where I had material written on there, like just this cringy ass material from like a like a 17-year-old's brain. I had this dude, I had these super cringy bits about the stages of being drunk. I had never even been drunk when I wrote the bit. It's the stupidest shit ever. I think I'd I and then I saw Chris Delia do like basically the same thing. I was like, did I just fucking straight up steal this and like write my own version of it? Like, I don't I don't remember, but the uh but like to actually start and be like I was on the same city block as a fucking comedy club and had no idea that it was there until I went for a random run. And then I was like, what? Like I lived, I lived across the street from the Pontiac Country Club, so I'm like on the same city block, had no idea. Yeah, yeah, it's it's fucking awesome though. I mean what uh for the for the local club of for me to be that one where doing the mic is like a treat compared to doing some of the bar rooms or some of like the the Legion or whatever, like oh my god. You know, doing doing some like shitty bar in you know fucking Redford or whatever, Lavonia, and no one gives a fuck that there's a comic there. They're watching reruns of some sport. You're like fucking really like you know we we did the I did the Legion in in Berkeley, uh Peggy's Peggy's room, Peggy and Paula's room. And uh I was like, am I compete- I'm competing with reruns of curling? Right? Like, are you fucking serious? Hey.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:06

And their backs are to you watching it.

SPEAKER_07 1:09:07

Yeah, they don't give a fuck. They're like, I'd rather watch people sweep ice than watch this guy try to do fucking five minutes. The only people paying attention were the rest of us. Like there's a handful of comics standing in the dark.

SPEAKER_09 1:09:19

There was one guy that was yelling at everyone. Yeah, that guy was a cunt.

SPEAKER_07 1:09:22

That guy sucked. The uh they did like a they had a a show before the open mic opened up, and so they had this Canadian guy headline. I don't remember his name, he's a tall guy. Uh I don't know, it doesn't matter. But he was having a he was having a rough time sticking with his material because this guy kept being like he would say a key word, like, uh, you know, I'm Canadian, and blah, blah, blah. But then this guy was there. 40 seconds later he'd be like, Right, oh Canada. And like, like, what the fuck? Shut up way after it would have been funny as a heckle.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:57

You can't even do anything with it because it's so weird when it happens.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:00

Yeah. And the guy was he was so like typical Canadian, he was so nice about the guy heckling. And I went up there and I was like, fucking, this is a VFW, isn't it? Like, talk about fucking you know, national relations. We're pissing off a Canadian guy in here. Be nice, you fucking twats. You know.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:19

Not that long ago, I was doing a show and I had my guitar on stage behind me, and there's this drunk guy in the back just going, play a fucking song. Fucking gonna do shit. Hate it. And and it was funny because like I went longer without picking it up just out of spite of that guy. I don't even want to play it now. Fuck you. And the headliner was like, hey, why didn't you pick your guitar up? They were screaming for it. I was like, I didn't because he was screaming for it. Fuck that guy.

SPEAKER_07 1:10:48

Dude, that's so funny. The only instrument I play is drums. Imagine like hugging logging a fucking drum set around. Right.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:53

Okay.

SPEAKER_09 1:10:54

Do you usually like is it are your sets a lot of guitar?

SPEAKER_03 1:10:57

No, if if I'm doing like 15 minutes, it'll be 10 and 5. It's usually about a third of the last third of my set is a is the guitar.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:04

Okay. A couple songs or so.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:06

They're all short. Oh, right. My longest song's a minute and a half.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:09

Oh, okay. Yeah. Right on. Uh Paula's a fucking murderer. Oh, she's awesome. Her songs are hilarious. I've seen a handful of her clips, and then also seeing her at their mic at the Legion in Berkeley was I'm like, dude, this lady is fucking hysterical. I've never heard of her before. Being in this misfit community Detroit, you know? She's fucking hilarious. Dude. Yeah. The uh it's like a stereotype that uh, or at least I've like heard it on all these fucking big comedians' podcasts that they used to hate going up after a mu a musical. Everybody still does. Yeah, because it's like I can't fucking compete with music. Everybody feels the same way. I'm gonna go up there and tell my goofs after I sing a song. That's why he does it.

SPEAKER_06 1:11:54

You you fucking jerk.

SPEAKER_07 1:11:57

Go up there and sing a song, and it's like good luck, fucko.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:00

And then I'll get booked some places, and the booker will tell me I can't bring it.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:05

No, we not we don't allow that.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:07

All right, well, I'm bringing my props. Well, there's headliners that won't, you know, that that'll specifically say no music.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:13

Oh, because it's gonna take the energy out of uh out of them headlining. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I could see that for sure. Dude, we were laughing last night that that lady went long as fuck. We were like, I was like We were watching you flashing. It happens. I looked at the clock, it was like nine minutes. I was like, God dang it.

SPEAKER_03 1:12:32

Well, in fairness, I didn't get a chance to tell her it was only five minutes because she was late. She wasn't around for me to say, hey, thanks for coming out. Five minutes tonight.

SPEAKER_07 1:12:46

Yeah. She's like, did you say 25 minutes? I will absolutely do that. She's funny. I'll give her credit. She's funny. Oh man. I was just like, I saw you like I saw you trying like different methods. Oh yeah. I was laughing harder at you than I was at her bit. Because you're like, you went from like flash and then you like had your finger over the light, and you're like, she's a bro, she's been doing this a long time.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:10

But it's like she like that that she should have picked up on that first one. She's good.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:17

She's funny.

SPEAKER_09 1:13:18

I uh got distracted by the light.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:21

Yeah. I did uh Stephanie and Ophelise.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:24

It's not like I'm not standing right next to the clock either.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:26

Right. Dude. I was cracking up at you trying to get her to trying to get her off. That was fucking that was fucking horrible.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:35

She was about 30 seconds away from me walking up there.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:38

Yeah. Yeah, it was long. I think she went like that.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:42

I could I should have done it two minutes earlier. Yeah. I would have been well within my rights. Yeah. Yeah. But I kept thinking she's okay, she's wrapping it up.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:49

Yeah. And then it's eight and a half minutes on a five minute set. You're like, well, what the fuck? Oh, this was a new bit.

SPEAKER_09 1:13:54

Is that what you do? Just walk up and take the mic. I just start walking.

SPEAKER_07 1:13:58

Congrat give it up for just Yeah, you gotta. You got you gotta you gotta do your fucking time. You gotta do your time. I mean, better to go short. You know? I mean, you don't want to go up there and do one.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:09

One time at the castle, I was just sitting back there beating on the door, waiting for the guy to get off. Oh shit. And then I just had to go out there and tell him he was done.

SPEAKER_07 1:14:16

Yeah, because he wasn't dude. I panic when I get the light. I absolutely, dude, on my showcase, I completely fumbled my closing, my last joke. I panicked because I got the red light and I just everyone's heads. Yeah, I couldn't see anybody, then all of a sudden all these red heads appear, just boom. I'm like, huh.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:32

It's like you can see everybody all of a sudden.

SPEAKER_09 1:14:34

And uh and then he just skipped to his punchline and oh, I didn't even do the punchline.

SPEAKER_07 1:14:38

I said something I've never said before on that bit, and I fucking completely fucked it up.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:42

Have you been to Ann Arbor? I've not done the showcase. The showcase is really strict. Uh like I I honestly like like to your point of what you're saying, like if if you go one second over at the Ann Arbor Showcase, you're like banned for six months or return to yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:00

For real. Is it a one-minute light like that they do at Ridley's though? Like, hey, you got the light, you get a one-minute light. You got one minute light.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:06

And if you if you're over, so I've never done a set there that's longer than like four minutes and twenty five seconds.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:12

Yeah. Just then you know it's gonna be good.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:16

I've noticed myself and other comedians have talked about it to each other. Every time we go there, we talk really fast.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:22

To get everything out.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:23

Yeah. Oh, because everyone's nervous.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:24

Like, I don't want to get banned. Well, no, you just you gotta get it out, and you're five. I think this is gonna get I think I got five minutes to get all this out. That's it, comes out in four and a half minutes.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:34

I mean, better to be short, you know. Fuck it's not how you know, yeah, dude. Especially if they you got the pressure of like you're not gonna be here again if you fuck this up. Yeah, I panic, dude. I had this uh I had this joke about like my my fucking imaginary aunt being on Ozempic and like being hot now. So like the joke ends with like you know, I last year I would have been impressed if you waddled to get your own seconds at Christmas dinner. And this year I'm you know I'm I'm wondering if you're married into the family or if you're available. And then like the tag is like, do you get that? Like if she was married and she's not available, if she's related to me, I could fuck her. You know, it's stupid. But I I skipped all of that because I got the light, and I go, last year I would have been impressed if you waddled to get your own seconds, and this year I'm wondering, are we related?

SPEAKER_09 1:16:22

You didn't even say that. You just said, now I'm wondering if we're related.

SPEAKER_07 1:16:25

And I was like, okay, I'm gonna put this back now. And I just like I literally say, I'm gonna put the stand back now. All right, this is my time. Goodbye. And I was just like, I walked back and I was like, Do you guys have rope? Right. I get some rope. Uh I did okay until then, and now I want to die. I don't want to go back to the green room and just have everyone stare at me like you fucked that up. Dude, that that 101 class that uh that that we did the showcase with, there were so many good comedians in that in that class. I was like, what the fuck? This is supposed to be a bunch of beginners. This is bullshit. I thought someone would suck, everyone did great. I go up there and I'm like looking at my notepad the whole time, like, I gotta get rid of my Binky, dude.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:04

I I just got rid of mine. Yeah. Like if I'm at an open mic, I I'm still gonna have my phone up there, but like I for whatever reason, I I cannot like I couldn't remember my material, and I just had to have it with me. And it I it I'm finally over it. And but I think the mo the biggest part is for so long, my a lot of it was inauthentic. It wasn't really me, it was me trying to be funny about other topics. And now that things are more written about my real life, it's easier to remember. And then uh they're longer form jokes. I used to just do a lot of setup punchline, a lot more just straight setup punchline. Yeah, and when you do that, I think it's a different kind of animal where it's it's a lot harder to remember 150 jokes, right? You know, in a half hour, or not 150. Like if you you know, you if you're telling jokes that are set up punchline, maybe a couple tags, it's hard to remember that many jokes in 30 minutes. Yeah, or 20 minutes, 50, however long you're doing it.

SPEAKER_07 1:18:01

Yeah, non suck non-sequitors are just yeah, I can't I can't fucking. So that it was that what you were doing in the beginning, you're just doing street jokes?

SPEAKER_03 1:18:08

Not street jokes, I was writing my own jokes, yeah, but they were just short.

SPEAKER_07 1:18:11

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that would be I I couldn't do that. I I mean like all of my bits are based in some kind of truth, yeah, and I still have like a very hard time remembering the stuff, you know. And I don't know, like I I started I I started to get the Ozempic five minutes down, and I felt pretty comfortable uh with it. And so the last two times I did it before I did the showcase, I I did it without I did it with a notepad on the on the stool. And then when I went to Ridley's, I just like fucking fall on panic. Yeah, you just see the sea of like candle and you can't see anybody, and it's just like it's like oh my god, fuck, dude. I'm on Ridley's stage. I'm I mean there was like a couple of month period like five or six years ago where I just I looked up Mark Ridley's showcases and I watched every one of them, like from Demetrius, who's probably the biggest guy that came out came up through Mark Ridley's to like guys that aren't doing comedy anymore. Like I watched a thousand of them on YouTube, and then you know, for it to come full circle so many years later, it's just like it all hit me all at once. And also, there's no good spot to go to get quiet, to like go through your bits right before with that many comics on an open mic or a show or showcase like that. Yeah, yeah. Well, you in the green room, everyone's talking. Yep, and then you go into the hallway, there's a speaker in the hallway, so you can hear what's going on on stage. You're like, fuck, there's nowhere quiet where I can get my own thoughts in. Yeah. I was like, I'm gonna go fucking hide in the bathroom, but there's a speaker in the bathroom. Motherfucker, dude. There's nowhere to go. There's nowhere to go to like wrap my head around my own fucking bits. And uh, I don't know. I think I might go into like the dark part of the hallway. Like, that's probably the best spot if I ever do that room again, you know, to go over my bits. But yeah, I got out there and fucking fully panicked. I was like, I know these bits by heart, and I can't remember the order of anything right now. I almost started with my fucking closer bit, and I was like, what am I doing? That's fucking I almost said the wrong thing.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:08

That's where the the the best advice that I ever got too was working on the same five over and over and over comes into play because it part of my challenge is probably because I always ran open mics, and I always felt like I needed to have new material every week for the same people that show up all the time. Yeah, so I didn't really work on an act, I didn't have an act until about maybe two years ago. You know, it and uh be because I was forcing myself to just to write new like topical new material week in and week out, yeah. And and kind of what I'm doing now is is going back and revisiting some of those uh premises and just punching them up, adding tags to them. We were talking about that earlier, just lengthening bits. Yeah. And then my brain that just popped into my brain.

SPEAKER_07 1:21:00

Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, like, yeah, that like I've said, like watching these sets back, and I'm like, man, there's so much more there. Like you get the like I'm ending where the audience just got on my side and is just starting to enjoy that. And then I'm like, all right, so anyway, let's fucking completely change subject. It's like, if we were if that was going like that in a one-on-one conversation, I was making somebody laugh in a conversation, I would not hard left turn and go to something new. I'd be like, oh, okay, let me fucking now I'm energized, let me ring this for as much as I can.

SPEAKER_10 1:21:32

Right.

SPEAKER_07 1:21:33

And you know, watching back the bits, I'm like, dude, there's so much that I fucking just step on by moving on, you know. This fucking uh I also comes with experience, yeah. Yeah, they yeah, doing I I I will say doing the shitty mics that like everyone knows is like this is gonna suck, but at least you get a rep in. I think it helps you realize where your writing sucks. Like there's something about doing a bad room where no one cares anyway, and then you run through the material and you're like because you're really hearing yourself, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, instead of like going, you know, doing a great, you know, doing a great room like One Night Stands, where like everyone is there to laugh. Like, you know, the silver fox and uh and his wife who's there every week. I know I I know they've heard my jokes like three times now or four times, or the jokes that I did last night, I know, or a couple of the jokes I did last night, I know they've heard like three times, and they laughed. And I'm like, Well, you're here to laugh.

SPEAKER_10 1:22:27

Right.

SPEAKER_07 1:22:28

And like I appreciate it, but I want the person who didn't laugh. Like, why would I fucking what could I have done differently to make that person laugh?

SPEAKER_03 1:22:35

You know, some other uh on that note, like uh some someone told me long ago, like when you walk into a room, it doesn't matter how many people in it, a third of the crowd is gonna hate everything that you do, no matter what. A third of the crowd is gonna love everything you do, and you have a chance to win over a third of the crowd. So you already know forget the people that the forget the third of the crowd that is was never gonna be into you in the first place. Yeah, you already have the third, and that that that other third that's into you, if you can get half of them and you have half the audience on your side, you're fucking killing. Yeah, you're getting half of the audience to laugh all the time, you're it's it's a great show. Getting everybody to laugh is special.

SPEAKER_07 1:23:19

Yeah. See, this is where my brain is broken, is that I can make if if I was in a room of 50 people and I got 49 people to laugh, I'd be like, why'd that guy not laugh? Yep. Why that motherfucking laugh?

SPEAKER_03 1:23:28

You see that you see that one guy up in front with his arms crossed, yeah, and that's the only thing you think about on the way home.

SPEAKER_07 1:23:33

Yeah, why'd that motherfucker not laugh? What the fuck's his problem? Fuck him.

SPEAKER_09 1:23:37

They probably are laughing inside.

SPEAKER_07 1:23:39

They just look like somebody tell I don't remember yeah fucking grade A RBF over here. She fucking it's a problem. People are like, does Paige not like me? And I'm like, no, she just is not expressive at all. You should try banging her. It's fucking awful. Okay. I'm just kidding.

SPEAKER_08 1:23:57

Thanks.

SPEAKER_07 1:24:02

Stop! I'm just kidding. Like you've seen it. Exactly. Fuck off. I have tools, I have equipment. You wanted to be a part of this. You did not have to be a little bit. Go home now. You didn't have to be you didn't have to be a part of this. Uh some uh some comic was telling me that I don't remember who it was. But they were telling me that they they were so focused on a guy who was just like that, sitting in the front, arms crossed, like looked pissed off the whole time, and then when they did like a like a walking out the door meet and greet kind of deal, like had a table or whatever at the fucking back, that guy walked up and was like the most complimentary, like, dude, your material is so good. Like, oh my god, you fucking that was you were you were so like why didn't you fucking laugh? Like, I enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:56

It happened. I I just did Big Tommy's a couple months ago, and this guy up front, I was doing crowd work with him, and he it I didn't feel like it was going well, and it, but it I guess it did because he followed me to the back of the room after my set and was like, that was great, and handed me 40 bucks. But I thought he hated me. I thought he was coming to kick my ass and gave me money.

SPEAKER_05 1:25:20

Dude, that's fucking hilarious. You're like, this is gonna hit me.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:24

I I really I really thought I was gonna get hit.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:26

Here's dinner on me.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:28

Or like you just you know, in the hallway, just you know, what the fuck's wrong with you kind of thing? He was a scary looking guy.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:34

He fucking gave you a tip.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:35

Yeah, that's that's what I learned. You gotta pick on the scariest looking guy in the crowd.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:39

Yeah, oh yeah. Dude, what was your uh what was your first paid gig?

SPEAKER_03 1:25:43

Oh, my first paid gig was uh Funny Spot, Mark Bonto.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:46

Right on, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:47

It was Captain not it wasn't the Captain Quarters, it was a show, his room he doesn't have anymore, I don't remember it. But yeah, it was a Mark Bonto show. Right on, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:55

And you opened for him or featured?

SPEAKER_03 1:25:57

No, he he he uh he he runs showcases out there, so it was like I'm trying to think of who was even on the show back then. Maybe me. I know me and Nick Kelly. And I don't remember any of the other comics that were there.

SPEAKER_07 1:26:09

Dude, Nick Kelly's a murderer. He's fucking yeah, he's awesome.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:13

He was I was dude, his fucking I don't want to I don't want to blow up his premises, but he's dark and he's smart as fuck.

SPEAKER_07 1:26:19

Yeah, he was fucking killing his his I don't know if it's new, but it was new to me. I've seen him a few times uh on other mics with him, and his the new stuff that he was doing last night was fucking killing me. Yeah, fucking killing me. He's brilliant, yeah. He is funny as fuck.

SPEAKER_03 1:26:35

I'll I'm gonna be done his roast battle on May 23rd at the indie. Oh, right on be fun.

SPEAKER_07 1:26:39

Yeah. Oh uh is he is that where he's out of normally? Is Planet Ant or whatever?

SPEAKER_03 1:26:44

I think I think he's one of the producers down there. I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_07 1:26:46

Right on. Dude, he is funny as fuck. I like there's a there's a bunch of like good comedians, but there's like three that I think like if anyone's gonna pop out of this fucking scene, he's gonna be one of them. You know, he'll be one of the uh couple of guys that I that I think of. Uh Garrett, I think, will just brute force his way into fucking popping. He is a workhorse, dude. I'm I'm impressed by his work ethic. I fucking every time I met talk to him, he's like, oh, I'm doing fucking four nights or four four spots tonight. I gotta drive from fucking, I'm gonna do one in Fenton and one in Canton and one in Royal Oak, and then I got one in Toledo tonight. I'm like, You fucking psychopath, dude.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:26

It's too much, man.

SPEAKER_07 1:27:27

I'm doing like two a week. Like I I was trying to do the two every Wednesday and then trying to do two on Thursdays, and I I fucking get up at four in the morning, dude. I don't know if I can I like this is the dumbest hobby for a guy in the trades. It is. I should have got into gardening or golf or whatever other things I also do, but I tried woodworking first. That's the fucking smarter one. You can do it whenever you want, dude. I just have a bunch of tools. Same, same same same same. We are the same person, I'm realizing it. Time goes on here. Uh did you did you start that because you were watching a bunch of woodworking YouTubers and you're like, I'm gonna do that too?

SPEAKER_03 1:28:08

No, I went into my buddy, I went I visited my buddy, he lived in Maryland, and he was into it and he was showing me all the stuff shit that he built, and I was like, ah, I want to do that.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:16

Yeah. It's fun. Dude, I I built furniture for like three years because of the colour.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:20

I made a couple of cornhole boards, and that was it. Really? I did a few DIY things around the house, made some cornhole boards as a gift for my in-laws, and that was it. I was like, fuck this. Fuck this. No, I um I had a uh well, I'll just it's my excuses, but I had my second uh next uh dysquectomy or uh fusion in my neck. So it was like I stopped woodworking, I stopped doing all that stuff, and then yeah, just kind of failed.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:44

Every every machinist. Yeah. Well, I stood over.

SPEAKER_03 1:28:49

No, I was I before I ran uh CNC, I was a bridge port operator drilling holes all day. And it was like the the the repetitive motion of my neck being down, like this, looking at oh, watching the tool, watching the tool, no shit. Whoa, I could never prove that that was always happened for workers' comments. Of course not. That's what the doctors told me.

SPEAKER_07 1:29:07

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, repetitive motion. I mean anything, dude. For me, it's uh for me, it's my shoulders. Like if I have to do anything above head, I can't, it's just fucking murders me. I like my hands will go to sleep, and then it's just screaming pain. And uh when I when I went to physical therapy for I had a bicep tendon tear that went into my pec and uh or some kind of injury is what they suspect. It was never proved, but the uh they had like a little shoulder uh model and they showed me why it's the your uh the tendon the tendon for your shoulder that goes like over and in like through like a crevice.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:45

You're talking about thoracic outlet syndrome, is that or no? Usually it's just something to go ahead.

SPEAKER_07 1:29:49

No, it's like it's the well, it's the actual tendon for your shoulder. Well, the tendon, not the vein. All right, all right, go ahead. But so like when you put your arms above your head, that tendon is actually getting pinched by your bones. You're like you're not designed to keep your hands above head. And I thought it was like a chronic thing from injuries from like riding dirt bikes and fucking and pipe fitting, you know. It's like but no, it's I I I don't know, it might be a combination of those things, but every year that goes by, I'm like in a little bit more pain somewhere. I'm like, I gotta get the fuck out of pipe fitting, dude. I make good I make a lot of money though, so it's like it sucks.

SPEAKER_03 1:30:23

It's like ah it's a young man's game though.

SPEAKER_07 1:30:26

Yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_09 1:30:26

It's you got a few more years in you.

SPEAKER_07 1:30:29

Yeah, it's well just because I topped, I just topped out. I just topped out, and you know, so now I'm a big big journeyman, so now I'm just making my apprentice work constantly unless I'm like hey, I'm gonna look at the print. You go ahead and do that thing. I don't know how to. That's fine, you'll figure it out. Ask me questions when you need to. I'm gonna look at the print andor my phone. Yeah, but oh man, having your fucking back is it your neck? Your neck's fused?

SPEAKER_03 1:30:57

Yeah. C5, C6, C6, C7.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:01

Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_03 1:31:02

You're 42? 44. I'll be 44 next.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:05

44. I was young to have a fucking fused neck.

SPEAKER_03 1:31:08

No, it sucks because it was 30 when it happened, and my doctor at the time just was like totally blowing me off to tell me I was too young to have back problems. And I didn't have my first surgery until I was 36 when they finally like started taking me serious.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:21

Hands going numb and shit. Yeah, all the time. Oh my god. Dude, uh, you have bulging discs in your neck from an accident.

SPEAKER_09 1:31:29

Five between my neck and back.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:31

That's terrible.

SPEAKER_09 1:31:32

Yeah, I got hit by a drunk driver.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:34

That sucks. Yeah. And what did she get?

SPEAKER_09 1:31:36

Fucking It was her third DUI, and it was a hit and run, so it should have been two felonies, and she got two years of probation.

SPEAKER_07 1:31:44

Two years of fucking probation.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:46

Damn.

SPEAKER_09 1:31:48

Yeah. I I think her lawyer was like friends with the prosecutor. It's ridiculous. I like even went to her court date and was like spoke because I was like, you fucked my life up. Yeah, right. But yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:32:02

Yeah, and they're more you know, be they were treating her more like a criminal than the fucking criminal because it was like, you know, we're gonna prove that your life was not altered, actually. Right. Oh, it's not a few. Really? This bitch hits me going, you know, how who got who how do you know how fast she was going?

SPEAKER_09 1:32:19

I I would say like 60 miles an hour.

SPEAKER_07 1:32:21

And you were stopped.

SPEAKER_09 1:32:22

I wasn't stopped. I was going probably 40. Okay. So but oh maybe that. You know what I had just as plenty then actually. That's not that big. Probably not 40, because I had just like there was a stop sign. I turned onto a road from a stop sign, so I had like just started to accelerate, so probably not even 40 yet.

SPEAKER_07 1:32:40

Yeah. And she rerun you and she ran through the stop sign. Now you got.

SPEAKER_09 1:32:44

Now I have a back issue for the rest of my life.

SPEAKER_07 1:32:47

Yeah. And the only way to fix it is to cut her throat and pull all the things out of the way to get to her spine from the front of her neck.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:58

I have one on each side. Oh, Zachary. My first one was on the right side, my second one was on the left side. It looks like I just got sliced open and my like I just someone slipped my throat. That's so fucking scary. That's so scary. That's so funny. It's not a bad surgery. Like the second one, I was up and walking around right after I woke up.

SPEAKER_10 1:33:15

Really? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:33:16

They I they make you go to stand up and go walk to the bathroom and everything. And they sent me, they sent me home. Outpatient surgery.

SPEAKER_07 1:33:22

No shit. Wow. Outpatient surgery for a fucking spinal surgery.

SPEAKER_03 1:33:26

It was during COVID. Like right after it was like a month after the shutdown.

SPEAKER_07 1:33:29

Yeah. Dude, I I was like the only patient in the hospital.

SPEAKER_03 1:33:33

It was like outpatient hospital. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:33:35

God, that's gotta be fucking freaky still, though. Just knowing that they're gonna fuck with your spine. It's like the oh, that's so scary to me. Yeah. I had a I had a knee surgery and I wrote a if I die letter in my phone because I was so scared. I swear to God. And then she was being a fucking jerk, so I played it on. I like had a I had my screen reader read it to her.

SPEAKER_06 1:33:54

I was like, You fucking oh, you think I don't care about this?

SPEAKER_07 1:33:58

Do you remember that?

SPEAKER_09 1:34:00

I remember you reading it to me. I don't remember you being upset.

SPEAKER_07 1:34:03

No, we were you were being a jerk, and I was like, you were like saying I didn't fucking like you or something. And I was like, I fucking wrote you a love letter in case I died during my meniscus surgery because I'm a pussy.

SPEAKER_03 1:34:14

Surgery is actually why I started comedy. Really? Yeah, in 2018 I had a uh emergency appendectomy, and they over-sedated me with the uh uh not the Xanax, the other one. No, that's like the one that just the one that calms you down, just the one that just the one that calms you down, and not before they before they gave me the you know the nighttime shit. And it they gave me too much of it, and it uh my throat or my tongue swelled up and it just went numb and hit the back of my throat and I couldn't breathe. And I thought I guess this is how people suffocate when they're having surgery. Yeah, and like they were like trying to strap me down on the t-I was trying to rip myself off, they were strapping me down. It was it was crazy. Holy shit.

SPEAKER_09 1:34:55

Did they not realize that your tongue was messed up?

SPEAKER_03 1:34:58

No, because the anesthesiologist and the nurses were all at the Elton John concert the night before, and they were talking about how awesome the concert was behind me and while I'm laying on the table, and all I could do was slap myself in the face. Oh my god, because my arms are strapped down, it's all I could do was try to get their attention. I it seemed like an eternity.

SPEAKER_07 1:35:18

Holy shit. I was just fishing out on the table, trying to get them attention, like, hey, I'm fucking suffocating here. Yeah, but like eventually something like their your your vitals would have, you know, gone through the roof or whatever, and then then they would have.

SPEAKER_03 1:35:46

I came home from work, you know, just kept the curtains closed for like six, eight months, and just decided I had to figure out a way out of it. And I just figured I'd get it get in the lights and get in front of people and talk on a stage.

SPEAKER_07 1:35:58

Because it fucked with your head so bad that you almost died.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:01

Yeah, I I just became like introverted and I couldn't stand it anymore.

SPEAKER_07 1:36:04

Yeah.

unknown 1:36:05

God, that's fucking stuck.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:06

I still struggle with when I hang up with my speech and stuff, it's kind of like I don't know what happened. I don't know, but like something happened in here where I got kind of maybe it's the bright lights like I'm looking up at the surgery light or something.

SPEAKER_07 1:36:17

Yeah. So you almost have to We can turn it off. No, I'm fine.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:20

I just yeah, I just feel I felt I've been feeling off this whole time. I apologize. Oh really?

SPEAKER_07 1:36:27

We could have changed something. We could have just put the overhead lights on if that was bothering you. Fuck. But that's fine. I mean I gotta get used to it. Those actually might be worse. Right. But do I so you I mean you're traumatized from it. I mean, uh, you know, if it's if it's you know, seeing a light is fucking triggering you and and reminding you of that sensation.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:43

Ever since then, any flashing lights or anything, like it's been it's been it's been tough.

SPEAKER_07 1:36:48

Yeah, yeah. So you get anxiety from it? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Do you have anxiety issues outside of that? Or did you before?

SPEAKER_03 1:36:54

I did, but I didn't care. Like they didn't wasn't a big deal. You know, this just brought everything out like tenfold.

SPEAKER_07 1:37:02

Yeah, yeah. It's like I I have horrific anxiety issues. Like, like the whole like fucking taking baths because I'm scared is real. Like I have I have horrific. But like I I don't know what the trigger is though. Like I I have health anxiety, which is a new thing. I used to make fun of my brother for being a hypochondriac, but like now every time something new happens that I have to cope with or learn how to live around it, like if it really fucks with my head. Like I think like I don't know, maybe maybe getting like into the 30s and 40s is like that age where it's like, oh my god, I have to cope with aging now, and like that's a whole new thing. Yeah, you know, me and my brother talk about this all the time because he's seven years older than me, so like he's starting to see like things that I don't have yet with his body, but like I've uh I have asthma and I had my asthma was basically at bay for like 15-20 years. Like, I like I was like really bad when I was a kid, and then it was fine. And then I got uh I got pneumonia and the flu uh in 2020. In in February of 2020, I had pneumonia and the flu, and I didn't know that pneumonia could go into your blood and kill you. I had no idea that you had COVID. No, I said everyone says this. I did not, I didn't. They couldn't they tested me for it. I didn't have COVID.

SPEAKER_03 1:38:16

They weren't testing for it then.

SPEAKER_07 1:38:18

They were. They were COVID's existed forever. It's just uh They weren't tested. Whatever. They they tested. I'm calling bullshit. I remember them swabbing my brain. That was when they had to go deep. Yeah, the oh, the deep dig. They were fucking, they like poked so hard like one of my eyeballs like went out a little bit. But the uh so I had I had pneumonia and the flu, pneumonia in both lungs and the flu. And anytime I opened my eyes, it felt like I just got off a merry-go-round. So I'd close my eyes and just tried to do that for a week in the hospital. I coughed so hard I shit myself. Back on that again. That's the second, that's the other time I shit myself. Dude, I caught and my nurse was hot as fuck, dude. It's it's such a we weren't together. But I mean, but my nurse, my nurse was this like 22-year-old, just like bombshell, and I'm like coughing so hard that like bile is coming out of my stomach, and then I shit myself, and I'm like, oh my god. And I'm I'm so sick I can't get up and go to the bathroom without help because I'm like I can't breathe. And I'm like holding on, I'm like pulling shit off the walls, trying to get to the bathroom to clean my pants. And uh she comes, like she walks in right when I finish getting shit out of my pants, and she goes, Do you what are you doing? Are you okay? And I'm like, I'm I'm good. And I'm like trying to not show her that I'm rinsing shit out of my pants. And she's like, Are you going to the what are you doing? You you had to go to the bathroom? Like, yeah, just had to pee. And she's like, You gotta call for us. And I'm like, I'm okay. And she's like, Are you sure? I'm like, I'm fine. And she's like, Do you want help getting back in bed? I'm like, no, no, no, I'm okay. Get the fuck out of here. You know, what did you do with the clothes that you rinse? You know, they got the handicap bars around the toilet. I just draped them over the bar to dry.

SPEAKER_09 1:40:07

And you just went commando for the rest?

SPEAKER_07 1:40:08

Yeah, because that's what they wanted me to do anyway. They wanted me to just be in the gown.

SPEAKER_09 1:40:11

So you could shit on the bed instead.

SPEAKER_07 1:40:13

That would have been a real problem. But that was but that was my first taste of like really like facing mortality was was because I was cl like I was close to being dead. Like I was on the I was on the strongest antibiotic that exists, is an IV antibiotic for a week.

SPEAKER_03 1:40:32

And uh it's because they didn't know how to treat your pneumonia.

SPEAKER_05 1:40:38

Dude, it was horrible. It was horrible.

SPEAKER_03 1:40:40

I'll tell you, man, it was like January, early February 2020. My wife got really sick, and they then they were they're like, We think it's pneumonia, but your lungs kind of look like pneumonia, but not quite. And then she had to go back and like it, there's a thing, and then I got sick. And then I was I don't I remember like talking to my mom one day, and I was just like, It's the weirdest thing. I can't taste or smell a goddamn thing. It was here. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Before I before it was supposed to have been here.

SPEAKER_09 1:41:09

Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah. Dude, I I've had COVID like four times I think four times.

SPEAKER_07 1:41:15

Yeah. Dude, the last time we had it was bad. Like the last time we had it was bad.

SPEAKER_09 1:41:21

I was just so tired. We just we just had it December?

SPEAKER_07 1:41:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:41:26

And I think that's the only thing I get from it anymore. I just it's lethargic and I just want to sleep all the time.

SPEAKER_07 1:41:31

It was I had it. Like I was fucking good. He was worse than I was not good. I was fucking we had to go to the hospital because of him. Yeah. I couldn't breathe at all. I could not, like, nothing I did was fixing it. I was doing it. I do. He likes the hospital is his second home. Right. I love it.

SPEAKER_03 1:41:48

Like the food there.

SPEAKER_07 1:41:49

It's all the no, the food sucks. All the hot nerds. No. The it's the only place I have health anxiety.

SPEAKER_09 1:41:55

So he feels very safe.

SPEAKER_07 1:41:57

I feel safe at the hospital. I would fucking get an apartment there if they let me. No, I have ex I have excellent insurance. I pay fucking 25 grand a year for it. Jesus. Fucking ridiculous. It's ridiculous how much we pay out of our package for insurance and what we get out of it. Oh, right. But no, I yeah, I was no matter what I did, the last time we had COVID, I just could not catch my breath. And I was like, I was like, I'm getting scared. Like I can't fucking breathe. And I got a uh I got a boring myself. Um I got a I got a pulse ox and my pulse ox, my, my, my O2 levels were like 94, and I could not get it any higher. 94, maybe 95. And uh, and the worst of it, it went, it had dropped down to 89. And I called my mom, she's a nurse, not because I'm a bitch. It's both, it could be both. Uh I call my mom and I go, uh, hey, my oxygen is 89. And she's like, That's not good. Uh you should she's like, have are you cold? I'm like, I'm not cold. And she's like, try other fingers. And I like I tried my pinky.

SPEAKER_03 1:43:04

It's a weird thing for your mom to say. Try your other fingers.

SPEAKER_07 1:43:08

Try more fingers. Try all of your fingers. That'll work. That always worked on your dad. Uh, but she uh so she's like, well, try a different finger because you maybe it's a finger, like maybe you're not getting a good reading on that finger. So I switch fingers and I'm like, okay, I got like 93 on my pinky, but I'm getting 89 on every other finger. She's like, well, they would go off the highest number, so that's still not good. You should probably go to the hospital. And uh yeah, they didn't do shit, they didn't do fucking anything. I did a breathing treatment there. I'm like, I'm just overdosing on albuterol as well.

SPEAKER_09 1:43:40

But not when we went, no, that was that must have been a different time. Because when we went, I was like, Oh, I probably just have a bad cold. Like the flu was also going around. I work with kids, so I probably oh that was when we were diagnosed.

SPEAKER_07 1:43:52

I went there again because I couldn't breathe.

SPEAKER_09 1:43:54

Oh. Well, but yeah, so I was like, Well, while I'm here, you might as well test me too. And the and and his daughter, and they came back and they were like, You all have COVID. I was like, COVID's something. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:44:07

We have the Kung Flu. This is fuck you. I had the Kung Flu. Dude, uh I think I think my daughter loved it though, because she was like to sleep in the basement. The boys the boys had run of the entire upstairs of like the main level of our house, and our master bedroom is in the basement because we're trashy. And my but and then we have like a basement bar with a big leather couch, so my daughter just got to hang out and who doesn't need a bar in their bedroom? Yeah, dude. We fucking we have like a full-on Irish bar.

SPEAKER_03 1:44:39

There's a door between them. It's a true wet bar.

SPEAKER_07 1:44:43

We have like a full-on Irish bar in our basement. It's like it's fucking dark green. There's just random shit on the walls everywhere, just like there isn't here. It's uh this is this is our basement, except it's green. But she got to hang out in the basement for a for a week or whatever, and just got to watch TV on a fucking 80-inch screen or whatever we have down there. Just enjoying life, not being bothered by the boys at all. I'm like, are you how do you feeling? You feel okay? And she's like literally like dancing, like standing and dancing, watching some YouTuber on a screen that's the size of her entire bed. Right. Oh dude.

SPEAKER_09 1:45:18

Yeah. I just slept the whole week.

SPEAKER_07 1:45:21

I tell you what, like getting sick like this though, is like it's it's like it's it feels like it takes like a little bit of my like resilience away. Every time it happens, I'm like, I get like a little more scared of health stuff every single time.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:35

You get more scared every time instead of being like, oh, I got over it. I think I'll be okay.

SPEAKER_07 1:45:39

Oh that's a yeah, that's not the perspective I have. That's probably not probably the well, you should go about that's probably the mature perspective. I'm just like, see? Every day it's real. I just know I'm gonna get it again. Yeah, I fucking dude. I na I was the guy for all of my twenties. I was the guy that's like, I don't take anything, I just don't, I won't even take a Tylenol. Now I have like four medications I take every single day just to like be okay. I got like a nose spray and a fucking uh steroid for my a pill steroid and an inhaled steroid, and and then I'm still like wake up anxious and I'll go to the bathroom and I grab this fucking tool that I blow into to see what my oxygen liter is. How many liters per minute am I getting? 650, is 650 good? And then we Google it and it's like that's excellent, you fucking idiot. Like go to bed. I'm gonna go take a bath. I don't think I can breathe. I think this machine's wrong. I I don't know. I wish I could just fucking like get hit in the back of the head and like fix it. You know.

SPEAKER_09 1:46:47

I'll hit you.

SPEAKER_07 1:46:49

I know you I know you will. You hit me in the back of the head the other day, you fucking jerk.

SPEAKER_09 1:46:54

You deserved it.

SPEAKER_07 1:46:55

I wrong. What did I do to you?

SPEAKER_09 1:46:58

Sprayed me with water. That's right. So he got smacked in the back of the head and I cried about it for the rest of the day.

SPEAKER_07 1:47:04

It's not justified. Not justified at all. Not a proportionate reaction at all. I have a spray, I have a spray water bottle that I I I have all these seedlings that I'm starting for our garden. So I'm like delicately spraying all my seedlings. And then I started playing with the kids, spraying them with water, and then I was running up and down the hallway trying to get the kids, and then she was there, and I turned and went and sprayed her belly with the fucking water. And then she went like in the back of my head, and I saw stars. I was like, what the fuck? And she's like, I didn't mean to hit you that hard. I'm like, well, you fucking did. It really was an accident. And then I gave her shit for it for like the rest of the week. I saw fucking stars. She slapped me right on the bald spot, the fucking jerk. That's yeah, that's a that's a sensitive area. Right on my fucking built-in yarmulca.

SPEAKER_08 1:47:48

That's why it was so bad because you don't have anything protecting it.

SPEAKER_07 1:47:51

Yeah, you're right. Dude, that was sorry. I don't even remember what like what I was saying to you for the rest of the day. It was just like anytime you made any kind of comment, I was like, I'll twist this into reminding you that you slapped the shit out of me. That's good. That's a good time. No to say a lot. Sorry. Yeah, you're abusive, dude. I pissed in a cup for a year and a half for less than that. Silver lining being I got to hang out with Dylan Larkin's mom. There you go. She was my probation officer. Nice. So six degrees of separation. How many fucking Red Wings do you know? All of them.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:43

I performed with Darren McCarty. Oh, he is a he is a comic now, right?

SPEAKER_07 1:48:48

Is he good? Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:50

Yeah, he's fun. Well, he he'll be the first person to tell you like the slapstick comedy show. He even says it. Like he he brings a comic or two up, they do comedy, and he does like an hour of storytelling with some jokes thrown in there.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:49:02

Yeah. It's a good show.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:04

Right on.

unknown 1:49:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:05

Yeah. He uh it's kind of like so it's almost like um like Kevin Smith like almost does stand-up, but it's more like he's kind of like doing a tour of telling stories about what it's like to be a director. Right. You know? Okay. That's kind of cool.

SPEAKER_03 1:49:20

But he just tells all the stories of the good old days, and when he gets to the claw lume stuff, the place goes nuts.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:26

Yeah. Fuck yeah. Telling stories about beating up the avalanche or whatever. That's fucking beautiful. That's hilarious. I don't know. I don't want to be like a s I don't want to be a snob, so I want to I don't want to be like, that's cool. But like also then like Mark Marin's in the back of my head being like, fucking everybody's back up playing this real tea or comedy. Right. You know?

SPEAKER_03 1:49:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:52

I mean, I'm just glad Corey Feldman's not doing comedy.

SPEAKER_03 1:49:55

He's he will.

SPEAKER_07 1:49:57

I hope not. Just let him fuck. God, I don't know. Have you seen his fucking solos? It's just like, what are you doing? Pretending to dude so he's the comeback king. Oh my god. He should have just it was the wrong Corey, you know?

SPEAKER_03 1:50:17

It's the wrong, the wrong Corey. I don't know. I I when I was a kid, I wanted to be Corey Feldman. Yeah. I thought he was the coolest fucking. He was, you know, he was on all the cool movies. He was fucking Leonardo. I mean, he was the coolest niggas.

SPEAKER_07 1:50:34

He was the coolest guy, and then the coolest guy wanted to be Michael Jackson. So that's like some weird inception. And now he wants to be a guitar player, and the world is letting him, and I don't know why.

SPEAKER_03 1:50:49

It was a strange time for me. I wanted to be just like Corey Feldman and George Michael as a kid.

SPEAKER_01 1:50:54

I'm finding so much out about you right now.

SPEAKER_03 1:50:57

I mean, you think about his videos, you had all the hot chicks in his videos, but like then you know the real George Michael. Like, no, I don't want to be George Michael.

SPEAKER_07 1:51:04

I do not want that life. But yeah, I mean, literally, his music videos were filled with supermodels. Yeah. Like, I'll watch that Christmas song that he has just to see all the beautiful people on a ski trip together. It's the most gorgeous group of people that's ever existed. For real. Oh man, you wanted to be Corey Feldman and George Michael.

SPEAKER_03 1:51:24

I think I nailed it.

SPEAKER_07 1:51:24

And where'd you stand on Boyd George? What other questionable 80s character did you want to be?

SPEAKER_03 1:51:32

I think for like an elder millennial, people born in the early 80s, like the the MTV for us was weird. Like we were too young to understand it, and it like it was it was a weird time to be, you know, six years old and or eight years old, and when MTV was really coming around, it was provocative. Now it's more normal, like it's everything is now, but it was just you know, it was a weird time.

SPEAKER_07 1:51:57

Yeah. I was I'm the so I was born in '94, and my generation was like the tail end of watching TRL and then watching MTV become like skateboarding and pregnant teenagers. And like, and then eventually like Jersey Shore and all that shit. Like we saw the down slope.

SPEAKER_09 1:52:15

We just saw the What do you mean the down slope?

SPEAKER_07 1:52:19

I'm not gonna lie, I love trash TV. I fucking but so I love Jersey Shore, but oh my god. I don't know, like MTV, like MTV should have been like what Palladia was. It was just like exclusively all music, and then it's like, why is this music television? We're watching these fucking pregnant teenagers like talk shit about their baby daddies. It's a great show. It's not, it's fucking not, it's depressing. It's depressing. A bunch of fucking kids.

SPEAKER_03 1:52:49

It's created a whole generation of unwanted babies.

SPEAKER_07 1:52:53

You're hey, let me call my 12-year-old.

SPEAKER_09 1:52:55

You're just mad that you didn't take the opportunity that you had there.

SPEAKER_07 1:52:59

We applied. Hold on. You think I knocked up a moron and we did not apply to be at 16 and pregnant?

SPEAKER_03 1:53:06

Well, they thought they wanted him at 16.

SPEAKER_07 1:53:09

I got a fucking 13-year-old. Yeah, I'm fucking only 32. We had him at 19. It's the dumbest shit of all time. I wouldn't change anything now, but my god, it sucks.

SPEAKER_03 1:53:20

That's a rough time in your 20s.

SPEAKER_07 1:53:21

Oh my god, it sucked. It's it fucking. I was so broke. I smoked cigarettes. I was so broke that I would swipe my card and start the gas pump and then run in to buy my cigarettes with my last like$8 in my bank account so that I could get cigarettes and gas and just overdraw my account by fucking$50.

SPEAKER_03 1:53:41

You gotta make it worth it. Dude, it sucked, dude.

SPEAKER_04 1:53:44

It was fucking brutal.

SPEAKER_03 1:53:46

I used to bowl on Thursday nights, and they they the bowling out the bowling alley would cash up to$150, and I got paid on Friday. So I'd write them a check for$150 every Thursday and go party all night long.

SPEAKER_07 1:54:00

Burn through that$150. Then you walk in on Friday like, here, here's half my check. Oh my god, it was brutal. I had a fucking family, I had a family of five. When was Jamie born? Jamie was born in 2019. So I had a family of five by the time I was 25, and I was an apprentice, a first period apprentice, pipe fitter, making$14 an hour. It was fucking brutal. I was painting apartments and doing loop Uber and Lyft and just doing whatever I could do to fucking survive. It was brutal. Fucking the stupidest way to start a family. Now I feel like if I had just had freedom up until now and then started a family with you where we're like we both make good money, it's like I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 1:54:44

I don't know if I just your personality type have been able to handle that much freedom.

SPEAKER_07 1:54:48

No, I'd probably be dead. I probably would be dead. Oh my god. The amount of shit that me and my buddies got into until you know, just just in like the three months of freedom that I had before I had my kid, between like finishing high school and then having a baby. Oh my god, the amount of shit we did. Fuck no, dude, I'd be dead. I'd be fucking or in jail. Like half all my friends are dead or in jail. And I thought that was just like a a bad punk song. But it's true. Full circle where we bought our house is the neighborhood where one of my buddies that went to prison lived. We see his dad moan his lawn once in a while. We're like, oh yeah, that's fucking he's in actually, he's out. He got out of prison. Armed robbery. He robbed this fucking moron, he robbed the same 7-Eleven twice in one day. Uh-oh.

SPEAKER_03 1:55:41

Went to prison for it was just down the street. Fucking idiot. I think he lived on the same block.

SPEAKER_07 1:55:47

Right. I mean, literally, it's like a mile away from our house.

SPEAKER_03 1:55:50

Frequented there all the time.

SPEAKER_07 1:55:52

Right. They're like, hey, what's going on, dude? The usual pack of newports. They actually should give me all the money. Again? Today? Fucking idiot. The usual?

SPEAKER_03 1:56:02

Yeah, here's all my money.

SPEAKER_07 1:56:04

Oh, scumbag. So stupid.

SPEAKER_10 1:56:07

Alright.

SPEAKER_07 1:56:08

We're kind of tapering down, dude. We're at two hours. We can fucking we can wrap her up. That's fine. It's been fun. Yeah, dude. You got any uh anything coming up? So you got the show with Bill and Yellow Lead Better.

SPEAKER_03 1:56:20

Yeah. Re and then uh Supernatural Monday. I don't know when this will come out, but I run the Supernatural open mic on the second Monday of every month down in Lavonia.

SPEAKER_07 1:56:30

Right on.

SPEAKER_03 1:56:31

We'll keep that going hopefully all summer long. Other than that, I think just the in May. I got some stuff coming up in May, and that's about it. Heck yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_09 1:56:41

What's the m is the Michaelics thing all the time? Aren't you on that?

SPEAKER_03 1:56:46

No, it's he he has a group of like he he has a pretty large pool of comics that Billy Chapman that he that he uh that he that he works with. I was the original member, Michaelics crew member like back five years ago. Um but no, I don't have anything to do with that other than just performing.

SPEAKER_09 1:57:04

We were at Irish Tavern and your face was yeah on our table.

SPEAKER_07 1:57:08

Yeah, I was gonna I was gonna I was gonna message you because there was there was an advertisement right above the urinal and I was like it's really weird to hold on to my dick and stare at you.

SPEAKER_03 1:57:17

Yeah, that was uh that was the very first Michaelic show that they did there was the three of us. So we we ran it back five years later. It was a fun time.

SPEAKER_07 1:57:23

Right on. Yeah, I was seeing I was seeing those advertisements like I I used to live right down the road there, you know, off of Elizabeth. And uh I used to see those advertised all the time. But yeah, that's fucking sweet. I yeah, I've I th I've thought about trying to start another mic somewhere in Waterford just because like I don't want to have to drive to fucking Ferndale or Royal Oak or Detroit or you know what I mean or Ann Arbor if I don't have to. And we talked about it like we should try to do like a late one on Thursdays so that we can take the fucking same group of comics from One Night Stands, and but I was like, I wanna I I value doing one night stands so much that I would not want to step on the toes of it. I'm like, I'm not gonna do that.

SPEAKER_03 1:58:07

But in the reality of it, you know, I don't think it really matters. You know, everyone's out here trying to work our own course and you know, our work our own path and figure things out. You know, like I I ran a show, I ran an open mic, a late open mic for like a year and a half, just a few miles from the comedy castle on Saturday nights. Um I I texted him, you know, I was like, it was Bill. I texted Bill. I was like, hey Bill, is it gonna be a big deal if we do something like this? And he's like, oh you know, yeah. So I don't I don't think it really he just wants to be able to do the mic. Right. Yeah, because that's no, that's a great point because that's why I I I've always run open mics, is because if you want stage time, the best way to get it is to do it yourself. Yeah because you if you want to host the show, you can do 10 minutes up front if you want to. You can you can you can do it however you want to, you can do 10 minutes in the middle. You know, you how you know uh stage time is valuable. And if you're gonna do it on your own, make your own connections and maybe make a couple bucks doing it. I don't see anything wrong with it.

SPEAKER_07 1:59:03

Yeah, yeah. Well, for me it's it's about making connections with people to get them on the podcast too. It's like I like I love doing I love sitting down and learning about people so much, and almost I I hate to I I don't want to say more than comedy, because like comedy is like my fucking my first true love. Like I was watching Insomniac as like a nine-year-old kid. Like I had absolutely no business staying up till midnight watching the shit, uh watching David Tell walk around fucking New York and do comedy sets, but the uh but I I'm like a lifelong comedy fan, and but I value this damn near equal. It's like a it's like 60-40 maybe, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:59:43

No, I can tell you got a passion for it. Yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_07 1:59:46

I love it. I mean I fucking love it.

SPEAKER_03 1:59:47

And if I can it's a gift to be able to talk, yeah, you know, and and and stay on topic. I I can't do it.

SPEAKER_07 1:59:54

It's it it's a skill, dude. It's it's i this is not natural. Like to sit down and uh anymore. I I think fucking uh I think in the modern era where like everyone's watching fucking 15 seconds of TikTok at a time and just like scrolling while they have a TV show playing on their TV in the background. Like to sit down and force someone to like, hey, we're gonna talk for two hours uninterrupted, and we're gonna like not be Googling shit the whole time, and I'm not gonna be showing you YouTube clips while we do it. It's hard.

SPEAKER_03 2:00:24

It's my phone's buzzed like 40 times. I haven't pulled it out yet.

SPEAKER_07 2:00:30

But it's like, I mean, there's there's a couple people that came in here and like had a really hard time. Like, you want to start over? Like, hey, hold on, let's go get a shot and like we'll start over, dude, because you fucking, you know. The first couple I did with my brother, he was like, he couldn't do it. He like, he wore a fucking blazer. I'm like, what are you doing? You fucking homo. Don't put it, don't put take your blazer off. We're we're sitting in my six-year-old's bedroom. You got a fucking blazer on like you're a professor. Go fuck yourself. He's coming on tomorrow. I'm gonna tell him to wear his blazer. That's funny. Not tell him why. Oh, I'm gonna wear a full suit tomorrow. We're doing a we're doing like a midnight podcast tomorrow. I'm gonna wear a full suit and I'm gonna make him wear a blazer, and then we're gonna talk about nothing but malarkey. Just act like professors.

SPEAKER_09 2:01:14

Have fun.

SPEAKER_07 2:01:15

But yeah, I but I do I do want to start a to circle back, I do want to start a mic because I think it'd be valuable for connections. Yeah, you know. Absolutely. You know, and I feel like I'm like figuring out who my like core group of comedy buddies is gonna be. Like me and Garrett like clicked immediately. Me and uh Floyd Jones fucking clicked immediately just because he's an absolute fucking insane person and I love him. And uh and obviously me and you like you gave me my first fucking stage time, so like you know, you're always gonna have a fucking place in my heart, you know. That's how it goes. Yeah, and then and and meeting Bill uh Bushart, which Floyd Jones told me I should open up my showcase by saying that his last name is both Bush and Shark, and that's pretty cool. So I'm not gonna do that to him. But you just said it for the whole world. It was on the podcast, it's not a secret, it's on the but yeah. I mean, like making all these connections Floyd can tell him. Yeah, that's what I told him. Like, you do that. He's like, it's a fun diagram of the fucking Bush and Shark. I'm like, that's your comment. That's not my style at all. That's fucking silly. But yeah, me like figuring out a core group of dudes that I want to have recurring on the on the show to like shoot the shit with. I feel like we're making our own. Oh, Kate, Kate Dore is it Dore or Dore Dora? Doray. Okay, Kate Dora. Everyone says it different. I know. That's that's where I feel insecure saying her last name. But like me and Kate, like are she's like my fucking comedy mom. I like a text her asking for advice like fucking three days a week now. And she loves it. Like she'll t she'll talk my ear off for fucking hours and hours and hours. So she's the best, dude. Her and her uh fiance are the shit, the fucking nicest people on earth. But yeah, I love this.

SPEAKER_03 2:03:07

I we're after the first after after the very first open mic at stands that we did. Uh me, her and Nick went down and did karaoke down in Lavonia. I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_07 2:03:18

Fuck yeah, dude. Uh we're we're building our own little Rogan sphere here. It'll be fun. Without the racism or whatever. Anyway, on that note, dude, let's wrap it up. Fuck yeah. Thanks for coming on, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:03:31

Do it again.

SPEAKER_07 2:03:32

All right.

SPEAKER_08 2:03:33

Peace. Bye.

SPEAKER_07 2:03:34

I never have ultimate purpose. It's not survival. It's it's finding purpose in white.