EP 61: Eric Barber on Fitness After 40 + Why Accountability Changes Everything

What if the best years of your health, strength, and purpose are still ahead of you?

In this episode, Cathy Meehan sits down with Eric Barber, founder of Barberic Training, to talk about why fitness, weight loss, recovery, and motivation can feel harder as we age — and why that does not mean change is impossible. Eric brings decades of coaching experience, along with his own deeply personal story of rebuilding his health after a painful season of depression, weight gain, and loss of direction.

Together, Cathy and Eric discuss the power of getting back to the basics: clean nutrition, progressive workouts, strength training, realistic goals, and consistent accountability. They also explore how faith, purpose, hormones, stress, and mindset all play a role in helping people in their 40s, 50s, 60s, and beyond feel stronger, more energized, and more capable of living the life God has called them to live.

This conversation covers:

• Why fitness and weight loss often become harder with age
• How hormones, stress, recovery, and metabolism change over time
• Why accountability can be the missing piece in long-term health transformation
• The importance of strength training, protein, hydration, and clean nutrition
• How to cut through online fitness noise and return to the basics
• Eric’s personal journey through depression, weight gain, and rebuilding his health
• Why stacking small wins can create lasting momentum
• When lab work, hormones, and medical support may need to be part of the conversation

If you or someone you love feels tired, stuck, or discouraged about starting over, this episode is a reminder that your best years are not over. Share this conversation with someone who needs encouragement to take the next faithful step toward better health, renewed energy, and a stronger sense of purpose.

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Transcript

0:00

There's something that people begin to notice when they're in their 40s and 50s and 60s that hey, what we did in our 20s and 30s just doesn't seem to work anymore. We are facing energy changes, recovery changes, our hormone shift, our life just gets so much busier, and we also handle stress differently. On today's Mehan Mission podcast, I'm joined by Eric Barber, the founder of Barbaric Training. I love this episode because he really brings it down to the basics and especially accountability. Not only that, but Eric lets us into his personal journey of where he was five, six years ago at the heaviest he'd ever been. He had stopped working out and he was just spiraling into depression. And it's very important for people to realize that the best years of your life are not over. And sometimes it just takes that little nudge into getting physically in shape, whether it's by, you know, working out and, you know, dialing in on nutrition. And I will say that I personally went through this journey after Jim's passing. And it has transformed my life and it is giving me more energy so that I can carry on my purpose and Jim's legacy. So please share this episode if there's people that you know that might be in this same boat because I promise you that the best years of your life are yet to come. So please let's welcome Eric to the show. Hello, everyone. It is another edition of the Mehan Mission Podcast, and I have my friend Eric Barber, the founder of Barbaric Training. Eric, how have you been? I'm good. I'm good. It's been a little while, right? That's barbarous. It has been a little while. So it's time to get you back on, definitely. Yeah, well, because you know, I get all kinds of questions when it comes to fitness and health and wellness, and especially from this audience of people who are aging, me included, you know, we're talking about people in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s. And, you know, we just don't train or lose weight or build muscle like we did when we were 25. So I thought, who better to bring on than Eric Barber? So we can talk about, you know, why fitness is getting so much harder as we age. So uh what's going on? Yeah. Um everything changes as we get in the 40s, 50s, 60s. And um I used to, I used to really fight that idea. I used to tell people when I was young, when I was in my 20s and 30s, and older folks would tell me that as I was coaching them, I told them that they were wrong and come to find out I was wrong, you know. Um things definitely slow down. Um, I heard or or read that um when you get to the age of 35, I think it is, you stop going up and you start cresting and then you start coming down. Uh, meaning that things are on just on a constant growth. They stabilize and then they start to decline. So um that shows up in so many areas, of course, recovering from workouts, recovering from injuries, um, all kinds of things. So, yeah, this is a this is a very important subject and something that I deal with all the time, since most of my clients are in their 40s, 50s, and 60s. Well, I, you know, I can I'm gonna admit to everyone that when I was in high school, my diet, oh gosh, people, it was Doritos and Snickers and Diet Dr. Pepper and shakes and pizza and hamburgers. And um, I don't go anywhere close to those now. So I know that it there's definitely an effect on my body as far as like, you know, changes and nutritional requirements. Um, absolutely for sure. So um, where do you start when you are actually um trying to help someone that is aging? And how do you start a whole new workout program? What do we do? The first thing I always do is I just ask a series of questions to try to find out what their situation is. You know, everybody, you can't just lump everybody up in the same category, right? So the first thing I do is I try to get people talking about themselves and I ask pinpoint questions on, you know, how um what their medical situation is like. Are they do they have any injuries, either lifelong injuries, chronic injuries, or even just recent injuries, that kind of thing? Uh, medications, you know, illnesses, sickness, all kinds of stuff. I just try to get them to open up and talk. I'm taking a flurry of notes and uh and just hearing where each individual person is at. You know, everybody's got their somebody might be struggling with arthritis, and another person might be struggling with depression, um, food addictions, alcohol addictions, all kinds of stuff. I mean, it is true that when we were young, when we were on that growth cycle, we could eat whatever we wanted and and not be affected like how we are now. Absolutely. Um, I was in the same boat. I could never get enough calories. I was uh I was an extreme ectomorph, meaning I was very tall, very skinny, and um I very much wanted to be a muscular man, young man, and um I just couldn't get enough calories in. And so things like pizza and cake, and I mean anything that was leftovers, I was just like a human garbage disposal. I can't even, I can't even think about eating that stuff now. You know, the body just doesn't that stuff catches up when your body starts to go into the the decline phase. You can't get by with eating an entire pizza every night before you go to bed, you know, without waking up the next morning and paying a price for it. So yeah, absolutely. Um that's where that's where I start with people. I I start with what's going on right now and what their history is. Well, that's really a great place to start because you are going to get that information out of them because I like how you say that, you know, no two people are alike. And so everybody has different circumstances. And the more information you can gather, the more you can create that plan. And then going back to that, you know, curve that you talked about when you hit that plateau and then you start to go down, we have to realize people, as we age, our hormones decline. And not only do they naturally decline, but you have to you have to consider all of the like endocrine disruptors that are out there in our environment. I mean, there's soy, which you know can mess up with your hormones, and there's the BPA and cash register receipts and the lining in bottles. And it's like we just can't, and the microplastics, all of these things. We can't live in a bubble. I've said that before, but what we can do is try to, you know, reduce some of these environmental toxins. Um, and then also, you know, there is a time where you actually need to seek medical care for those things, which you know, we can help with those, but really a big factor of it is your nutrition and your workout. Yeah, that's really a huge part of the whole thing. Yeah, if you focus on those things, you're actually going to improve your hormone output right there, just with nutrition and exercise. So it's always important to, you know, really start there. Yeah. On that. But um, yep. I uh I when I ask people these questions, every once in a while, you know, what they're dealing with is out of my out of my league, out of my parameters, you know. Um, and I'll be like, hey, you you do need to go see a doctor about that, you know. Um if somebody has a uh you know a shoulder that has um been dislocated or and it just never set right or or needs a complete shoulder replacement, you know, things in there have been cut in half and you know what I mean, they don't work anymore. Or if a person's struggling with suicide and things like that, I believe that that nutrition and exercise can heal a lot of what we struggle with and deal with on a regular basis. But there's some things where where I'm like, hey, listen, we we need to you need to go, I would recommend going a different route on this. And and yeah, most definitely. Yep. Yeah, you can only fix so much. So, but um, so I do have a question. Like, as you work with people or just even the population in general, it seems like a lot of people, they really kind of like get stuck in their habits and they don't want to change, or they're not motivated. I mean, how do you approach those people? Yeah, aging, aging kind of changes the rules, doesn't it? It your recovery slows down. Um like you said, your hormones shift. Um, stress seems to hit much harder as we get older, I would say, than it did when we were younger. Um, you know, sleep and recovery matters much more. And um, you know, we it's the the slowing down of the metabolism and the ability to put on body fat, as well as losing muscle if you don't use it, right? If you if you don't use it, you lose it. And it just it's amazing how it just snowballs and gets out of control. So um what worked when we were 25 doesn't work when we're 45, 55, 65. You know, we just have to I tell my clients all the time that you know people ask me, they're like, How do you how do you still keep going? How do you still look so fit? And how do you, you know, all these, and I'm just like, I have to train smarter and eat smarter than I ever have in my life, you know? And I'm not gonna give up. I I've got I've got too many people um that and I I don't say this weird, I you know, they look up to me, they're like, hey, this guy is living the life. I want to hear what he has to say. So I know I've got eyeballs on me, and that helps a lot, you know, that helps me a lot. Uh but also just my own goals. I just, you know, I I'm gonna be a grandpa one day, and I want to be that grandpa that gets on the floor and and wrestles with my grandkids, you know, and and uh gives gives my kids a break, and grandpa's gonna take them out for a while to the playground and things like that. I want to be that guy, you know. So I've got my own goals as well. As well as um, you know, I'm I'm uh what I'm 56 now, and I still in a weird way, and and again, I don't these are just stepping into Eric's big little brain here, but um I don't ever want to look like a victim. I want to walk around and still have that look like this guy can handle situations and let's not mess with him or or hey, this guy can be, he looks like he can be counted on. I want to be that guy, and that's how I live my lifestyle. I always think no, that's really good. I don't want to give that up. And you have a purpose, you know, you have this purpose, and and that's a lot of the times, you know, our focus when we're working with clients and patients is to make them as healthy as possible so that they can fulfill their purpose. Because if you're fatigued or you're tired, you're so stressed out, and you don't feel like even getting up in the morning, then, you know, it's just this horrible cycle that just spins downward. And so, and you know, truthfully, I reached out to you um back last fall because I was overworked, I was stressed, I was gaining weight, and I knew that I needed to change, I needed to do something. And um, you know, it was it was, you know, oh Facebook, there's an online trainer. And so I reach out and um and you know, you gave me the accountability to literally change my life. I mean, and but what's so great is that with that accountability that coaching provides is, you know, I didn't want to get up every day in the beginning. I just did because I had that accountability to you. But once you work that into your lifestyle, then you start to like, I'll say you get addicted, or it's like you like, you know, you can miss one day, but don't miss two. I don't think I ever missed a day. But it was just, you know, the accountability changing my lifestyle. And then when your body starts to feel better, right, that spiral goes upward to where you have more purpose and you want to do that. So I thank you for that. I thank you for that. Um, but you know, one of the things that I want to talk about was there's is so much information online and there's just like all of these things, these like fast workouts, and there's like all these trends, and you see these like 25-year-olds just you know, shredded and all that other stuff, but um and people that just want to compare themselves to other people. What do you do to help like make that noise go down? So it's not so much fitness noise, if you want to call it that. Yeah, that's hard. You know, I'm in the in the health and fitness world on social media, and I have I'm in a sense, I I don't look at it, I don't I don't look at it as competing, but in in a sense it is competitive, you know. Um, I've got young people taking off their shirts and talking to the camera and saying things as if they're truth in all situations, and it's like, you know, you you kind of haven't really lived long enough on earth to really know what you're talking about. Um, you're still 25 years old, and kind of like what I said, how I just didn't believe and I didn't understand what it was like to be older and have things not working the way that they do when you're bulletproof and in your 20s. I mean, so yeah, we we live, you know, I remember, I just I remember there were times when I was like, I just don't know what to believe, you know, like um I'm so confused, I don't know what to do. Um, in the in the 80s and 90s and 2000s, it's like, man, you know, I just couldn't get enough information. Now it's like in it's like we're not lacking inner information anymore. Now we have too much. Anybody can get online and and say things black and white, and it comes across the truth, and all of a sudden they're qualified to say these things. No, they're not. You know, it's just we have too much information coming at us now. It's like, do we do keto? Do we do fasting? Do we do uh intermittent fasting, carnivore diet, uh supplements, peptides, hormones, influencers are telling me this, you know, conflicting advice. Now we've got AI. How many times have I been on AI and I've had to correct it halfway through a conversation? Right? I'm like, well, wait a minute, you know, you just sit told me this, and I correct them on it, and they're like, Oh, yeah, yeah, you're totally right. And it's just like, man, I, you know, it's just so much we're getting hit with it. So I guess in answer to your question, I go back to the basics, you know, I go back to the basics, right? Um, especially as we get older, we need a warm-up before we start lifting heavy weights, right? And we do need to lift heavy weights, we need to lift heavy weights for what we consider heavy, right? That is a smart thing to do. That's how you build muscle, right? So the smart thing to do would be go back to the basics, start with light weights and progressively work yourself up to heavier weights, and then you move on to the next exercise and you do a warm-up set. You warm up those muscles and those joints, and you progressively get heavier. And then when you've done your sets on that, then you move on. You know, that to me is common sense, you know. Uh, millions and millions of it's pretty basic. Yeah, it's literally basic, you know. Basic. When it comes to nutrition, you've got protein, carbohydrates, and fats, you've got vitamins, you've got minerals, and then you've got water. Like these things have not changed. So I go back to a lot of the basics, and there's a lot of cool stuff coming out now about hormones, as you know. Uh, peptides, very, very cool. But hold on, like, if you don't have a base, why are you trying to work intricate wiring in that house when you haven't built the foundation of that house first? Oh, you know, good way to put it. Yeah, like people are just tripping out on all kinds of things that I would consider, like if you look at the human body or rebuilding your body as building a house or rebuilding a house or remodeling a house, I should say, right? Why are you tripping off into what to do with the tiles and the wiring? You know, is just no, no, no. Let's go back to the basics and let's start at the base and make sure that the foundation is good. Well, do you think that they're reaching for those, like and and yeah, I peptides are great, absolutely. You know, we prescribe them and all that, but do you think they think that those are quick fixes? Oh, absolutely. I gotta tell you, when you go back to the basics, people back to the basics means patience and time and consistency and discipline. That's what going back to the basics really entails. And, you know, it it took me months. Um, why you have that 90-day challenge? I mean, it takes 90 days to, and that's just the start, you know, to really set your body in motion and your mindset in motion. So I I feel like, you know, people are looking for these, you know, they think a peptide is a quick fix or a supplement or something like that. When you're right, you gotta you gotta start with the basics. I love your analogy of the house. Yeah, I like peptides. As a matter of fact, I like them a lot. The more I research on them, the more I'm like, okay, this is, you know, because I having been in this business now for gosh, I've been a personal trainer for 36 years, but I've also been working out before that, right, all the sports that I did. So 40 years, right, of health and fitness. And I've seen everything come down the pipe, you know. I remember back in the in the 80s, liver pills, like all the big guys at the gym were like, Eric, you got to get on liver pills. And I'm like, okay, you know what I mean? So um I've seen everything come down the pipe, like um multi-level marketing uh packages and and all the I don't want to name the names, but you guys know what they are, and um, you know, just just ridiculous diets and all these different things. And so now I have the ability and the and the benefit of sitting back and just kind of crossing my arms to say, okay, let's watch this new fad. Let's let's see how this is five years from now. And 90% of the time they disappear. Like that, what do you call the asai berry? Do you remember that whole movement? The asai berry, yes. It's very good for you. I mean, it's healthy, but it's not what they claimed it would be, you know. Yeah, it kind of disappeared. Very good for you, very good, but but it's not a quick fix. They were toting that as the as the answer to everything, and a lot of people were making a lot of money off that. And then when that fad wore off, it just kind of disappeared. Doesn't mean that it's not still healthy, but yeah, so I don't know. I when I when I started researching peptides, I was like, oh, okay, like they're they're basically you know synthetic forms of amino acids. Now we're talking like yeah, so my concern is with peptides is people will get on it and abuse it, you know. Oh, I I I can lose weight on this, I don't have to work out. Oh, sweet. And then they get on it and they overdo it, and then you know, they lose weight, but then all these other problems come in because yeah, they haven't and the weight comes back when you stop. So yeah, absolutely. And that's why we're seeing now, I don't know, I've I've seen some pretty alarming pictures of some Hollywood profiles who look like skeletons now. And what I've been researching is when you take certain kinds of peptides, like maybe just like a GLP one or something like that, and lose a bunch of weight, when you go to get off it, your body quickly puts on weight again. So these people are staying on it. And you've lost muscle mass. And they've lost a ton of muscle mass, and and the cameras are always on them, and they have this unbelievable amount of pressure to look skinny, and it's just like, wow, it you know, things will always be abused. If something is healthy for us, there's always going to be people that that abuse it and take it too far. So I'm very excited. To see where hormone uh replacement therapy goes and peptides go and all that kind of thing. But we're, you know, I also know that with that we're gonna see a lot of abuse on that, sadly. Yeah. Because there is no quick fix, you've got to rebuild your foundation, you know. Yeah, and going back to that, so that brings us into accountability because it was accountability, Eric Barber, that changed my life and that really, you know, helped me. Um, in it, and I'm just gonna give the example. I went to Arkansas with my daughter Tori over the weekend and we went to a burn boot camp. Okay. It was so fun. I have not done one of those in a long time. But when we were finished, Tori and I were talking about how we were like, there is no way we would have done that entire one hour, you know, routine if we didn't have somebody yelling in a microphone telling us to do it and with all the steps, because you know, we were like, we probably would have done 30 minutes and then been like, hey, let's go get a coffee. You know, so accountability is accountability is key because I don't know enough people that are disciplined enough to start a problem or even know what they need to do. So um let's talk about really why it is important to find somebody to make you accountable. Yeah. So as we get older, as you know, as I know, we get set in our ways, right? I I mean, yes, we get set in our ways. We know what kind of foods we like, we know what kind of mattress that we like to sleep. We we know, you know, we've been around long enough. We we know what we like and what we don't like. So uh habits harden, right? Um comfort zones, you know, are pretty addictive, you know. Um excuses become normal. Um, you start you you you stop believing that change is even possible, right? Because you've been this way for so long. And yeah, it's like you avoid things, yeah. Yeah, the more you just don't change. Yeah, the older we get, the more these uh habits just become automatic. So a lot of times I'll talk to people and they'll be like, you know what, I'm just gonna do it on my own. And I'm like, okay, all right. And I'm thinking to myself, I'm gonna check in on you in three months or six months and see how that's going. Um, just because from the conversation, I can tell that they don't have the self-discipline or the knowledge or the awareness to to go through a body transformation um or even just positive life changes. And um yeah, so you know, they'll without the accountability, um, it's really hard to change those habits unless you really know what you're doing, you know. Um, I, as an adult, I've had to hire mentors and coaches to help get me past certain hurdles, you know. You can only hit your so you hit your head against the wall for so long before finally, you know, I just don't know how to do this, or I don't have the motivation or the discipline to do this. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's really key that you point that out, that you even as a professional seek professional help or guidance, or I mean, and that's also how we learn. Yeah, you know, because there might be something you don't know about. Yeah, yeah. That's another secret of mine, is I just I try to never stop learning. If if I see a little kid do something that I can't that I can't do, I will, I will get down on the ground, look them eye to eye, and ask them if they can teach me that. I have no, you know what I mean? Like I don't care. I'm just yes, I'm a sponge. If somebody does something better than me, um, I don't struggle with ego in that way. I will I will listen to what a person tells me if I feel like I can learn from them. So um, when it comes to accountability, I think a lot of times that's just the missing piece. You know, if I would have given you uh the meal plan that I gave you and all of the workouts and handed it to you, you know, the exact same thing you did in 90 days, handed it to you without the accountability, and just been like, hey, here you go. I know this is gonna work for you. Good luck. I'll check in on you in 90 days. Probably and I would have probably started it on day 89. Be like, oh, I need to do that. Or on day four, you'd have been like, you know what? I kind of miss my habits, I kind of miss my comfort, my comfort foods and this and that. Yeah. So accountability, um, it just provides structure, perspective, consistency, um, support, course correction. You know, accountability is is awesome. To me, you know, I can I can show people how to eat right, I can teach them how to work out, but the the icing on the cake, for lack of a better term, would be the accountability. So I have weekly accountable, sometimes daily accountability with some of my clients through texts and things like that. Um yeah, I I just people know that they've got to talk to Eric each week, you know, on the phone for half an hour, half an hour of me grilling them. Hey, how was this past week? Yeah, talk about the victories that you've had. Let's talk about any challenges. How let's talk about and do we need to make any modifications to your meal plan or to your workout? Yeah, the food journals. Yeah, the food journal. I remember doing the food journal. Yeah, yeah. So that was key. Yeah, I've I've made quite a few changes since even just training you back in uh back in the fall. You know, I'm constantly making this better because I learned from everybody. And I just my my 12-week program better and better and better, you know, make it more and more customizable per person. So, and finding a way where I can do that without me pulling my hair out, trying to remember everybody's different things and everything, you know. So I have a good tracking system now of how to keep track of my clients and that kind of thing. So when your child gets sick, the hardest part is often knowing what to do next. At Mindset Kids, we help you prepare ahead of time with trusted guidance, practical tools, and education that helps you care for your child at home with confidence. We provide you the tools in a handy home kit and natural health guide. Now you can assess symptoms, understand your next steps, and know whether to treat at home or contact us for more advanced care with one of our pediatric providers. Join today at mindset-kids.com. So, what do you find is a key factor in people who are successful with your program or any other training program? The power of the human body, uh, the when people start exercising and eating clean, it goes beyond anything that I can do. Because then the power of feeling better and sleeping better and people going, You look amazing. What are you doing? You know, it's that the power of, you know, all I am is I'm just I steer people, you know. I'm I'm like a rudder, I just steer people, right? Right. And when they start going off, I just steer them back on. Bring them back, you know, a lot of encouragement and a lot of holding accountable and and these kinds of things. But the power of the human body, when it starts to get healthy again, is so addictive, as you know, you don't want to go back, you know. So I can't even take credit for that. I just get people moving in the right direction. And I would say the results are what causes so much success. The results build upon each other, just like negativity can build upon itself, positivity can build upon itself. You know, uh, what is that uh compounding interest? If it's in the form of negative debt, it will compound and grow out of control. If it's in the form of um a savings account and it makes money each month or something like that, and you see it growing, that it's just absolutely powerful. So yeah, I would say that's what I've noticed in the people that are hugely successful is they they just stack wins, you know. I saw that happen with you in the very beginning with you. Um, you know, I don't think we saw a lot of change in the first two or three weeks, but then you started noticing codes spitting differently, and you're like, Eric, my energy. I had a lady tell me recently, she's like, Eric, my energy level is so out of control now, I don't know what to do. And I was like, is that a bad thing? She's like, No, I'm just used to laying around, but now I just I can't, I want stuff. He needs to move. Yeah, I want to move. And and I thought that was pretty cool. We took it, uh I took it as a compliment. Yeah, that is. So then she needs to take that and put that energy to whatever her purpose is gonna be. And that might be, you know, right volunteering or playing with her kids or grandkids or something like that. Yeah, so take that and move it that way. I think that's great. No, it changed mine. Okay, so uh uh couple of questions to throw out. So you've got people that say, you know, I have tried to lose weight and tried to lose weight, and I just can't lose weight. Um, because I hear that a lot. I really hear that a lot. Where does a person start from from there if they just can't lose weight? Well, obviously obviously hire me because that's what I do for a living. I help people do it. I do it through um positive reinforcement, I do it through healthy, whole, clean foods, and I do it through progressive workouts. I start them off easy, almost too easy, and then build upon it month number two, build upon it month number three. So that at the end of three months, whether they continue on with me or they're just like, man, I'm good to go. Like, thank you, Eric, for helping me get back up in the saddle. I got it from here, you know? So, yeah. Hiring somebody like myself, I think is a no-brainer. Somebody who's been doing it a long time, has a level approach, wants to take a healthy, whole approach to it rather than let's get you on this and let's get you on that. And you know what I mean? I think I think that would be one thing is find you a really good coach, a really good trainer, whether that be in person or online. If people don't want to do that and they want to do it on their own, they have to, they're gonna have to set goals. I'm a huge believer in setting goals. You sit down with a cup of coffee on a Sunday, and you just set you take a big look at your life and you think, okay, what are my goals? Nothing's gonna really happen until you sit down and you envision the change that you want. You can't just say, I want to lose weight, right? No, it's gotta be like, I want to lose a hundred pounds, or I want to lose 20 pounds, or you know what I mean? You have to start with concrete goals, period. Nothing's gonna happen until you sit down. You don't just change without goals, right? Yeah, yeah. Um, you take a look at the foods in your fridge and you're like, I know that's bad for me, I know that's bad, I know that's good. Question mark on that one, and then you start educating yourself. Like this is for people that don't hire somebody that are trying to do it all on their own. And when you come up with question marks that you can't figure out or you can't look, you go to Chat GPT and you you do a deep dive on that, right? So you start off with goals, you know. I I do go I do goal setting all the time. Whenever I reach my goals, I sit down and it's time to make new goals, you know. Very smart. Yeah, and then um from there, um, you have to take a look at okay, what is available around me? You know, what kind of gym do I have available around me? Well, I've got my apartment complex gym over here that's free, or I've got the YMCA two miles away, or I've got a planet fitness three miles away, or if I really want to make a drive, I've got that Gold's gym, you know, 10 miles out, or you know what I mean? You take a look at what you have available to you. Do I want to do indoor workouts? Do I want to do outdoor workouts? My buddy Joe has a garage gym, and he's been bugging me to train with him for the past five years. You know what I mean? So take a look at what's available to you. So after you set your goals, you look at your your eating habits and you figure out where you're going right, where you're going wrong, what you can make change, and then you take a look at what you've got available for exercise and and uh fitness and workouts, right? After doing all that, you're gonna have to somehow find yourself you're gonna have to, then this goes right back to the whole thing we've been talking about this whole time. You're gonna have to find a way for accountability. That is the key word. Again, that that's the icing on the cake is you're gonna have to talk to a friend and or or somebody who's in the field or something, and whether it be a workout partner or somebody who just believes in you or whatever, and you say, These are my goals, and I need you to be, I need to be accountable to you. Will you can can you be that person for me? You know, I think that that would be if you don't, let's say the person has not a friend on earth, right? Not one person that and it's all on them. And this is where this is where I was at six years ago. It's not that I didn't have friends, it's that I went through a divorce, I was hurting bad, and um my testosterone went from a high normal, right? Naturally, from working out my whole life, and it just tanked into the 200s, and I couldn't even form thoughts, and I lost everything, you know. It it felt like I I lost my gym, I lost my home, I lost, you know, all these different things, and and hit a level of depression that I had never experienced before. And also a lot of guilt because I was in everybody's eyes, I was a lifelong health and fitness guy. Yeah, that's really hard to maintain that image. So who could I reach out to when so many people looked up to me? So after about eight months, nine months of this, maybe longer, um, I looked in the mirror and I was 245 pounds, you know, which I have never been that heavy before. I wasn't working out. Um, I was eating whatever I could survive, I whatever I could get my hands on. And at the time, it was whatever was cheapest, you know. I was just eating for survival, and uh, I was angry at God, and I was um gosh, I man, it's hard to even go back there without getting choked up. Um the the memories are still so real and so vivid, you know. But I got to the point where I realized, and I don't mean to go all spiritual on this, but I I'll just tell you what happened to me. I got to the point where I realized that nobody was coming to the rescue. Even God. God wasn't gonna come to my rescue if I prayed to him and asked him for help, of course, right? But who has to still do the hard work? God's not gonna do the healthy foods, he's not gonna force you to work out, right? So I realized nobody's coming to save me. Like, you're a big boy, Eric, you're 50 years old. This is the reality of the situation that you're in now, and this is what happens when you don't work out. Something that I never knew. Like, I I was in new ground. Yeah, I bet that was foreign to me. I didn't know what it was like to be out of shape and overweight and depressed and eating junk food all the time. But that's what it just kind of merged into, you know? And so after overcoming this anger at God and realizing that he was for me and not against me, I started praying for help. Um, but I felt like he was telling me, Hey, I can't do the hard work for you. I'm I can't come to the rescue and do it all for you. You're gonna have to do it, and I'll help you along the way. Yeah. And so I was like, okay, what are my goals? I've got to get this weight off. I've got to start eating healthy again. I feel like garbage. I didn't know about testosterone back then. I mean, of course I know about testosterone, but I didn't know mine had dropped. I didn't, I didn't, it wasn't like I was going to the doctor or anything back then. A lot of people have no idea, which is why it's very important. I was very confused. And so I made some very rudimentary goals and I started going to the gym, and I man, again, I I hope I don't get all choked up saying this, but I remember there were times when I went to the gym, and um the first time I went, I made it to the parking lot, and I sat in my car and I couldn't stop crying. And then I went home. And I went home, and after thinking about it, I considered it a win. Because I got up and I went to the gym. You took the step. Yeah, yeah. And I remember the next time I made it to the gym and I made it in the doors, and I I um I looked around the gym and I'm like, okay, and I walked over to the cardio equipment. My goal was to just start doing just maybe five minutes of cardio just to kind of wake my body up. And I climbed up onto that cardio machine and I did two minutes and I started crying. My body felt like it was betraying me. And I I got back in the car, I drove home, and that was what I could do that day. And I considered it a win, you know? Yeah, and then I just kept that up, and I was able to look back on a weekend and be like, man, I made it to the gym five times this week. And then the next week I struggled through a couple of exercises and I had no energy, and I had I couldn't I couldn't focus and this and that. I had written some workouts out over the weekend. I was kind of getting excited mentally over the weekend, but then when I showed up at the gym, I couldn't get my body to do what it had done for the past 30 years, you know. But I left the gym going, at least I got my hands on some steel, you know. At least, at least I got I got some weights in my hand. And and that's how I built, and nobody came to the rescue. It was just me versus me. And uh every morning I woke up and I felt like I had an angel on one shoulder speaking. You know, you've got this, Eric. Don't give up, you've got this. And of course, I had that devil on the other shoulder going, You suck. You are so you are pathetic, man. You used to coach, you've coached thousands of people. Look at you, man. You can't even go to the gym, like the pain, and so it was just every morning I would wake up and I would get these uh thoughts. And so that's why when I created the the barbaric challenge, I originally made it for divorced men. Originally, you know, yeah, but what I found out early is that divorced men don't know how to ask for help. And even when you've got somebody that's wanting saying, Hey, I've been there, I climbed out of it, I'm here to help you. If you're in that mode, you can't really, it's hard to make sense of anything. It you don't want another person stepping into your life, and you know what I mean? It's it's hard. And so then I just opened it up to just men, you know? And then last October, I opened it up to women because when I was praying about it one day, I I just was like, Lord, I feel like this barbaric challenge, this 12-week challenge is for everyone. Like I've coached everyone from little kids to elderly, like males, females, thousands of people over the years, you know. And so I opened it up to women, and it was one of the best decisions I ever made, you know, because healthy I think so. Healthy, clean eating and and working out and accountability works for everybody, you know. It does, it works for everybody. I could I didn't feel right about opening it up to kids or to 20 somethings or 30 somethings. I my heart is with the 40s, 50s, and 60s. People here sitting here going, what what happened to my life? Like, you know, what's going on? And are my best years over? And I'm over here going, no, they're not. You know, no, no, no, no. Trust me, um, if you want to go it on your own, it is possible. I'm living proof. If you want to go it alone, it is possible. But I also had the benefit of 30 years of knowing what I was doing to to to not give up and just believe in the process and keep going. Um, so I don't know. I I don't know how much time we had. I probably went way over our talk. No, got no, that was just so I mean, but it's it was so real. Eric, because there are so many people that find themselves in that same boat, whether it's post-divorce, post-job loss, post, you know, death of a spouse. I mean, that's what spiraled me. And um and things happen to us as we get older. And, you know, just going back to what you had said, we have this little saying in my family, and it's a quote that I heard back in college that um, you know, you pray like it depends on God, and you work like it depends on you. Because, you know, it takes both to sometimes, you know, God will give you resources and direction and things like that, but you got to get up out of bed every day and take that step and move forward. And, you know, well, and that goes all the way back to Genesis, you know, where God said, Here's your garden, work it. God wasn't like, I'm gonna do the work for you. Like, yeah, part of the part of being a human is you've got to work. Yeah, absolutely. So, so and he rewards work, right? All throughout the Bible, he talks about a rewarder of good work, those that work diligently, right? And if you you lay around and you're you're lazy and you don't put in any work, don't don't expect a lot of of help. So kind of going back to what I was saying earlier in our conversation about stacking wins, you know, my first couple weeks going to the gym, they were they were mini wins. Like yeah, I made it to the gym. I drove foam. But I started stacking, I started stacking those wins. And after a month, I was like, whoa, why I lost five pounds and I've got some energy back, you know what I mean? And and then I just started stacking those wins. Um, I think a year, year and a half, I still didn't feel like myself, even after after leaning out and getting my physique back. I still didn't feel right, but I still didn't feel like how I used to feel. And that's when I went and got my blood work done, and they're like, Yeah, your testosterone has dropped. And I was like, Well, I can understand that, but I've been getting back into shape and working out, and they're like, Hormones are a little bit of a different thing here, like, you know, yes, yeah. It's not like you can start eating healthy and working out, and all of a sudden they're right back up to where they should be. It's like, okay, all right, and that's what started my whole introduction to testosterone replacement therapy and that kind of thing. And so, as you know, I'm on a I've been a lifelong natural athlete and proud of that. And for me to hear that my testosterone was low, was that low, and that health, fitness, nutrition wouldn't just jack it right back up, and then I had to take a strong, hard look at getting on on testosterone replacement to bring it up to what would be considered normal for my age. That was a big step for me. I thought that, oh, I don't want to get on druids, I don't want to be that guy. And then when finally I realized like this is a hormone of your body. This isn't like the guys that are taking massive, massive amounts of it, right? Using it, trying to get huge. All I'm doing is taking a little bit to get it up to what's considered a normal level. Yeah. You know, we should probably do an episode on uh hormones, how they naturally decline, and how we can naturally get them up. And then at some point, sometimes you do need hormone replacement therapy, but you know, we always want to try the natural approach first or even supplement diet, exercise, all of those things. Um, but we can definitely touch on that because it is very important that if you cannot figure out why you're so tired, why you're so exhausted, to get a full lab panel done and you know get that checked out because that's very important. So 100%. Oh, Eric, what a what an episode. Thank you. Yeah, sorry for getting all choked up there. I didn't mean to no, it was really great because I think that you really um let people know that you know you've gone through that boat, I've gone through that boat, and there is success on the other side, and that's you know, healing and just a whole new outlook on life and energy, and and you just want to share it with people, literally. You want to share it? It's funny, right? Before you did my challenge, um, you know, you of course had had lost your husband, right? And life was looking a certain way for you. That was your reality. But then after going through what you went through, now your your vision life looks totally different now, right? For me, how I was looking at life back then is nothing like how I'm living my life right now. It's amazing how health and fitness and nutrition and a positive mindset and goal setting and all these different things can really radically change a person's life. You know, you don't know what you don't know. You know. So true. So true. I also tell, you know, tell the young'uns, my kids, I was like, you you think you know everything in your 20s, you think you know everything in your 30s, you think you know everything in your 40s, but I'm like, you get to your 50s, and then you realize there's a lot that I don't know. For sure. It's always easy to learn. Hey, so let's let's wrap this up. And how do we find you, Eric? If somebody's like, I love Eric, I need to reach out to him, yeah. Where do they go? I've I've got a website, it's barbaric barbaric training.com. Um, barbar barbaric is misspelled on purpose. It's my name backwards, barbar Eric Barbaric with an E. Um, but I'm not proud of that website. You know what? I really need to, I really need to fix that thing. Um, you know what? You just need a contact. That's what you need. You just need a way to get to you. Okay, well, they can go to barbarictraining.com. Um, what most people do is they get on Instagram or Facebook and look me up on there. Same thing, barbaric training. And uh and I try to post on there a couple times a week. I I put out um a lot of testimonials, you know. I'm constantly putting out testimonials from my clients, and I'm trying to put out uh just good knowledge, you know, good, just just solid knowledge. I'm not trying to, you know, and and every once in a while I'll put uh videos of me working out, you know, just so that people know, oh, this guy actually lives the lifestyle, like he's not just you know, yeah, very important. That's very key. Yeah, that was great. Eric, it was great. I look forward to another episode with you. Always fun talking. Yeah, everybody, uh share this with people that you know have been thinking about working out, or you know, they're just a little tired and they need a new outlook on life. Then this is something to enlighten them. And of course, please subscribe and like all those fun things. And peace, everybody. Thanks, Eric. Bye, thank you.