Jest Out of Jurisdiction
Law Enforcement / First Responder stories and experiences with a focus on comedic blunders, events, and the lighter side of stressful jobs. Stories are firsthand accounts told by the hosts Flash and T-Dot with accompanying guest interviews.
Jest Out of Jurisdiction
Jump Street
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Step into the world of 1980s policing through the eyes of Mark Reiber, a former Cincinnati officer whose career reads like a Hollywood script. From posing as a high school student to bust drug dealers to chasing suspects featured on America's Most Wanted, Mark's stories transport us to an era of policing that simply doesn't exist anymore.
Episode Introduction
Speaker 2Music underneath it , the , the awning just getting out of the weather , so that creek is over there . Mill street right there , that it was it Street right there . It was rolling , it was getting after it and we look over the neighbors there that called it in . I said where's he at ? And I looked he was on his back skiing , holding on to a pipe that went across for plumbing and just clapping on top of it .
Speaker 2I've never seen anything like that in my life , not a stitch . And they couldn't keep on him . Ah , he was drunk , probably on meth , but this guy was just drunk and he was . I mean , he was , it was just he was bouncing that water like he was skiing , like a top water jig . I looked at Eric . I was like , oh my gosh , look at that . And Darrell and him came over . You know they jumped the creek trying to get to him . I was like , no , let him go , he's having too much fun .
Speaker 2I think he'd end up at Laurel Lake . That's a good possibility . They got him out of there . I was like gosh , he's still naked . They would take him up to PD . He'd cut his head just jumping in . We had him bandaged up and we didn't have clothes on him yet and one of the deputies came in . He's like oh gosh . And his woman was his dispatcher . She said get him covered up before she sees that she don't want to come home with me . I was like yeah . I'm home with me tonight .
Speaker 2I was like , yeah , but that's kind of the stuff here that we try to keep it lighthearted . I know some of our podcasts we get into some serious stuff , but we'll just go wherever you want to go .
Speaker 5It's fun . Yeah , just ask me anything . You're free to ask me anything . I'll just tell you no if I can't answer . That's fine , just make something up alright , you guys ready .
Speaker 4Alright , welcome back . We've got another episode for you . We're putting them out regularly again . It's kind of nice . I hope everybody's enjoying them . So far We've got me and T-Dots here . Doug's back with us again .
Speaker 2He's a fixture . He's a fixture now .
Speaker 4He's on the payroll , the non-existent payroll . The man of the hour
Mark's Early Police Career
Speaker 4is Mark Ryber . I hope I said that right . You did , nailed it .
Speaker 2Nailed it . Nailed it he practiced that all day .
Speaker 4Yeah , and Ryber , you're from Ohio .
Speaker 5Correct . Yeah , cincinnati I work . If anybody knows like going northbound , southbound 75 , it's exit 12 , but where between the walls are . If you've ever been stuck between those walls on 75 south , just past GE , that's the area where I lived and worked .
Speaker 4Okay .
Speaker 2Is that Hamilton , hamilton County ?
Speaker 5Yeah , Hamilton County . It's the first city outside of Cincinnati .
Speaker 2Everybody from this area knows Hamilton , so many people moved up .
Speaker 4Yeah , Doug sent me your resume . He said it was a boring resume . Mark sent it .
Speaker 3Oh you sent it .
Speaker 4So he just copied and pasted it .
Speaker 2I was like , yeah , that's definitely not a boring resume .
Speaker 4But so is law enforcement . All you've done , you started in law enforcement .
Speaker 5All you've done , you started in law enforcement yeah , I started when I think I was the name in the youngest Ohio I had at the time , because I found a law that before they wouldn't let you take the test , he were 21 . And then I pointed out , like you know , you can take the test but you can't be certified higher to your 21 . So I was able to get in before that .
Speaker 4So , yeah , I was pretty much got into this young man . That's a good , that's a good loophole wish I'd have been able to do that now .
Speaker 3Now mark the way , the , the way you get . Uh , you know , far as your certification in ohio goes , it's a little bit different in Kentucky , I think . I mean you can go ahead and like go to academy before you're ever hired with the agency , is that right ?
Speaker 5You're correct . Yeah , and I did that . In fact , I went to a place called Scarlet Oaks Academy , but they actually were able to do that in high school , but once again , you couldn't get hired until you were 21 , but they wouldn't even take , like you , take the test to your 21 . Yeah , so , but I , but I took the uh , uh , the . I got to the academy when I was , when I was 21 , like january . No , maybe I was , I don't know , 20 has been so long ago . I graduated january . I turned 21 in march , or maybe I turned 22 , I don't know . Whatever it was , but anyway , I was able to get in early and so , yeah , I think I started 82 82 .
Speaker 2I got just to go to academy .
Speaker 5So I went and did that and that's it .
Speaker 4Left college I got you so you got your Academy and your certification before you ever got with an agency .
Speaker 5Yes , well , you had to get somebody to back you , which is like I think they call the word sponsor . You had to sponsor you . So I found some little department that they made me come in on the weekends on occasion and dispatch , with no training , no , nothing . I'd answer the phone , go on the radio and tell somebody where to go . It was like really no training whatsoever .
Speaker 4That's a job that I would never want to do .
Speaker 5There's no way I'd want to do this and we worked out of a trailer . They just started , but they worked out of a trailer , oh wow .
Speaker 2Like a double wide or single wide type . It was single wide , it was trailer oh wow , like a double wide or single wide type . It was single wide , single wide , but yeah , I never heard of that one . But a new agency . I guess they're trying to get one started up , or or did y'all burn down or something oh , maybe I was under construction .
Speaker 5I wasn't there that long , but yeah , it was definitely out of a trailer that's pretty awesome wow so uh .
Speaker 4So what got you started ? What ? What started the itch to get into law enforcement ?
Speaker 5uh , well , you know it's funny . Uh , I was in high school senior year and some guy came back who was from my , my school , and he had had a nice career in the fbi and I was always a numbers guy . So I was like when I talked to well , you know , you need to hire more accountants than they do . They do detectives . That's what he told me back then and I said okay . So I thought , well , you got to do four years in college before you get the FBI . So that's why I started college . But then I started riding around with a , with a , a guy I knew from alington High School's department , a neighboring community , and he used to let me ride around on third shift with him and I just kind of caught the bug doing that .
Speaker 4Awesome .
Speaker 3That's the way most of us are , yeah .
Speaker 4Just takes one ride along .
Speaker 2I had no idea if I liked it or not rode with Daryl's aunt . Fell in love , fell in love . Now I got a little car sick , but still I was like , yeah , I could do this . Yeah , it was this guy too .
Speaker 5He also , he , uh , had a community of I don't know maybe a thousand people . I mean , the whole town wasn't more than half mile wide and long and it wasn't even that wide . Um , and but he , he , they called him , uh , what was it ? Five , something . I forget what the numbers were . Basically , anywhere there was anything in the county , he would go to it , he would run everywhere . He didn't care about jurisdiction . He got a call somewhere Because his little town had Just out of jurisdiction .
Speaker 2Yeah , all of New .
Speaker 3Heights was a pretty calm little town , best I can remember .
Speaker 5Yes , I mean I think they had four red lights . Yeah , I , I mean it was the they . I think they had , uh , four red lights . Yeah , I mean it was like mayberry really and they were all on one street , so outside of that they didn't have any red lights , that's awesome , it really was mayberry yeah yeah , yeah .
Speaker 5So I wrote with him and kind of got the bug out after that and I said I was already in in college for it anyway . But then I had to go to the academy and the rest is history , I guess how many , how many years total did you , did you do ?
Speaker 2are you still doing it ?
Speaker 5no , I've been gone a long time . Uh gosh , I've been almost on this 30 years , 28 years , I don't even know . Yeah , 20 . I guess it is going on 28 years , yeah , but well , fun story though . I'll tell you this though , I wound up getting fired and won my job back . Oh yeah , no , that's good . And I won my job back , and they pretty much paid me the last eight years not to work .
Speaker 4Yeah , you can't beat that . No , you can't , I need that gig .
Speaker 5True story . They fired me and I wanted my job back and then that day before I had the police chief arrested , I had that in my pocket and on some custom office charges and had him arrested . So then I go in the meeting next day and say where's the chief ? And he's like don't start that shit .
Speaker 2I'm sorry . Sorry about that . No , you're good . You're good . We're rated .
Speaker 5M or whatever I usually mark explicit on most of our stuff just to CYA , you're good , yeah . So they pretty much came back out and said , okay , I gave them a number and they said and all I did was the math like okay , I was only making about $30,000 a year . I had eight years to go .
Undercover High School Operations
Speaker 5I figured $10,000 to pay my attorney and I was like , okay , give me $250,000 and I quit .
Speaker 4They said okay , that's a good deal yeah .
Speaker 2Okay , that's why can't that happen ?
Speaker 4yeah , I don't know you wouldn't love it , you don't ?
Speaker 5have enough time to go on the whole story of that thing sounds complicated yeah , I'd like to hear it at some point in time .
Speaker 2It sounds yeah , that's a good story me and dylan just looked at each other like there's , there is a big story with behind . I'm like my whole ADHD brain came . I'm like this is what happened . This is what happened . I've thought of 15 things since you said that I was like man , I'm just going to let it go .
Speaker 5Well , the short story is basically you saw some of my crazy cop stories on Facebook and I pretty much got the word out . I was going to lock up every one of them , and every one of their councilman's kids too , and they knew I wouldn't take any prisoners . They knew that I had to write somebody for going 26 and 25 . I didn't care .
Speaker 4That's awesome , that's awesome . So it was the . Hamilton County Sheriff's Office that you started with .
Speaker 5Yes , they went to Lachlan .
Speaker 4Okay , and then Lachlan , let's see .
Speaker 2Yeah , tell us about some of them , but somewhere in there .
Speaker 5I don't know how , because I was terrible in high school but I was really good at taking those police civil service tests and I was like a free agent . After I left the Sheriff's Department I could have went to four different places . I finished first on a bunch of tests but I chose Locker because that was my hometown and they were also the third highest paying in Hemerick County at that time .
Speaker 4Well , you know , I've worked with some highly educated officers , and the ones that are not as book smart but are more common sense usually turn out to be better officers .
Speaker 2Oh 100% book smart , but are more common sense , usually turn out to be better officers . So that's oh 100 . Yes , so something doesn't um book smart always . It didn't always relate to the to what we deal with every day .
Speaker 4No , common sense and street smarts helps you a whole lot better out there . Oh , that wins every time . So once , once you were with the hamilton county sheriff's office . How long was it before you started doing detective work , or when you went to lachlan , I guess ?
Speaker 5well , let's get back to county real quick . So I in my resume I sent you , I called I did 30 days , okay , and back then you had to do like five years in the jail before you even you had a chance to get on the road .
Speaker 4Wow .
Speaker 5So that's where they started .
Speaker 4You're kind of like starting out as a bailiff , but they started you out in corrections , okay .
Speaker 5Yeah , correct , you had to do your five years in there and they would only hire from the jail , so they wouldn't hire from anybody from another community . That was the only way to go through and it was a long , long wait . This , that was the only way to go through and it was a long , long wait . And this is kind of funny . So I'm moving one day and been here 30 days and oh what , even 30 days and and I get a call where I've got some friends helping me move and the guy says , yeah , this is captain hinky , my home county sheriff's department . I'm gonna come up here to the county and talk to me about a special assignment . And I'm like , yeah , screw you , I'm moving . I ain't got time for that crap Because I thought it was one of the guys from jail messing with me and I hung up on him .
Speaker 5Phone rings back . He goes listen , listen , I know , I know I get it . Those guys are full pranks all the time . But listen , it's Saturday and I'm here at the headquarters and he gave me a number and said call that number , ask for me , and I'm working today and I never work on Saturday . I said okay . So I called the number and the guy answered the phone , I said , yes , captain Hinky , and they said , no , he doesn't work on Hold on a second . I think he is here today . And then that same voice picked up . I like , oh my gosh , I just told the captain , you know , blow off . Yeah , that's the way I started out that interview process . And so he called me up and said they're starting this special thing .
Speaker 5I don't know if you guys ever seen the movie 21 jumps 3 . Oh , yeah , well , I actually did that back in 82 . That was 20 . I was 22 at the time and they sent me to Taft High School in downtown Cincinnati . So you were having to pose as a high school student . Yeah , well , yeah , I mean I do anything . Get out of jail . I mean I like do something , yeah , but I've only been there 30 days already , hated it , but how can you think about it ? You're choosing to live in jail . Yeah , yeah , so , anyway , so , uh , uh , anyway , I interviewed with a couple other people and and , uh , they put me in this unit and I went back to that task . Now this is another story . So so it was , san Francisco was probably 90% black and I was the only person in one of my classes and for the senior class . I mean , they all thought I was a cop and uh , they actually voted me sergeant of arms for the damn senior class .
Speaker 2Did you pass ? Did you ? Did you walk the line ?
Speaker 5no , no , no . So I was like this ain't working out very well . And there was another area that supplied the school there . That was a white section that Pete Rose was from , down by Sedano Park . So I was trying to get with those guys . But I was stuck on this other side and I need to do something here because this ain't working out . I don't want to go back to the jail .
Speaker 5So I played on quarterback in high school . So I went there and this staff they didn't even have a home football field . They played all their way games Well , I think , quarterback high school . So I'm out there tossing the ball on the coast of Salas's hey , you go score here . I'm like , yeah , he said you won't play us . I don't know . I said my last time I played a coach was an asshole , you could talk like that there too . And the next thing I'm out there practicing with him and then find out a week later the coach there , the sergeant , calls me and says did you join the football team ? I'm like , yeah , I'm not going to play . And he goes what are you doing ? I'm like , well , I need to get in . But it's funny because they called me the white senator because I was the only white guy on the football team and they gave me a jersey . Once everybody saw me at school with the jersey I was in . And so then they said what are you going to do ? I said , well , sergeant , let's do this Because we had a back story .
Speaker 5I had to go to another city and learn all about a place called Beaver Creek , ohio . I knew some of the teachers' names , the principal , where all the kids hung out , the radio station Just in case you meet somebody , you've got to know your back story . And so we got up there because we had a fake report card , I guess you call it . So they put down that I failed the fourth quarter of the year before , so I wasn't eligible to play Smooth . But I still go to a game . And the coach they hadn't won a game in seven years and he brought my stuff . He's like we don't care if we forfeit or we form , we want to win a game . Well , I took the bus to the game and he had me out there pre-game taking snaps . I'm like I can't do this , I'm gonna get arrested or something out of this no , I'm not .
Speaker 4I'm not doing that you get them disqualified completely from competing at all .
Speaker 5I'm not doing that yeah , so anyway , so , uh , anyway . After that , though , I was going , because everyone , because everyone thought , yeah , that's the right guy , he's got a gun , you know an arm , and everybody in the community thought I was on the football team , but I never played a game , I only went to practice for two and a half weeks I've seen a movie , I think it's called Never Been Kissed . No 21 Jump Street .
Speaker 2Oh I know , but they also Never Been Kissed . Kissed it was Drew Barrymore and somebody , and that guy really did go out and play baseball . He was like 30 . Pretended to be , a high school kid Glory days .
Speaker 4In that operation . So what were you all trying to uncover , Was it ?
Speaker 5marijuana sales . Yeah , uncover was it . Was it marijuana sales ? Yeah , yeah , back then it was mostly marijuana sales . Uh , it was , you know , just trying to get the actually adults who were selling the kids and we wound up . I think I wound up arresting 45 50 the first year , wow so was it the teachers were selling to students , or was it ? No , no , no , no , no , no . But you know , the kids know everything . If you're a kid , you're like , hey , if I want to get some pot work somebody will take you okay and you wind up buying from adults .
Speaker 5Usually you know um , but uh yeah , we did that . In the second year I went to colerain high school and that was pretty much an all-white community and there I knocked out about 50 something arrested . But then we were buying cocaine and LSD there too .
Speaker 4Wow , they had the harder stuff over there . Yeah yeah , it was just a year different .
Speaker 5Koi loads , koi loads .
Speaker 3The loads , yeah , loads was big back in the day yeah . Man .
Speaker 2And you were how old when you you did this the second time I did . I was 23 years old and I passed as a junior so you I read this right you were a senior first and then
Working Third Shift in a Small Town
Speaker 2that's awesome and then , like , well , and during that time I well , actually the first day of school , the first year , my first daughter was born .
Speaker 5I think it was that morning and I think I went right from the high school , right , or right from the hospital , to the school . You're talking about feeling old , no kidding .
Speaker 4Yeah .
Speaker 5And then in the second year my second daughter was born and I needed some time off , so I went and grabbed the fire extinguisher , squirted it all over the place and I got suspended on purpose for something .
Speaker 4So was it an actual suspension ? Did they actually rot you one out , or is it ?
Speaker 5No , the guy who suspended me didn't know the principal didn't even know . The superintendent knew . Was that the only ?
Speaker 3ones privy to that information was just the superintendent , and then the agency itself .
Speaker 5Well , the first one , the principal knew . The second one , the superintendent knew .
Speaker 2Okay , that's awesome .
Speaker 4That suspended . And then the second one . The superintendent knew Okay , that's awesome , you got suspended .
Speaker 5And then the second one . I actually got busted because there was a counselor , because I switched from a vocational park because I ran too early kids there , so I went to the actual high school park . They were connected , though , and what was it ? One of the prosecutor's dad that's what it was was , uh , the counselor there and he did some checking . He goes , he called me , he goes . I don't know what's going on , but you don't say where you say you live and what are you talking about ? Because I checked on it , you don't live there . And I was like , right , give me the phone . I had to call my sergeant . I said you need to make a phone call , and then the superintendent calls back to that counselor's office and said okay , let it go .
Speaker 4Is that the only time that your cover got blown ? Yeah ?
Speaker 5that was it . That was it . That's awesome , although you know back in the day . I hope my kids never listen to this podcast . But you know at your undercover you're allowed to smoke pot . I mean , there was cases like you know , like I don't know if you heard actually down in Miami , I understand there was a case where somebody come in and say , hey , you're not a cop , you'll snort this cocaine Right , and so it was life or death situation so you're allowed to .
Speaker 5So , uh , I'm out one night with this guy . He goes hey , we're gonna buy this hawaiian sensimedia gold . I'm like , man , that's the reagent , that's gotta be pretty good stuff and we go by it . So I would fake it all the time . You know you'd fake , you know , yeah , and pass it back to him . And that guy was looking at me . He said you didn't hit that . Like what are you talking about ? He goes you didn't hit that . I was like , uh , oh , I'm caught . Then he called me a derogatory female name , yeah , and I said give it to me . And this stuff was the best stuff I've ever seen . I dropped him off . I had to call my partner Come pick me up at Wendy's . I had two singles , two fries , oh my goodness .
Speaker 2That's awesome .
Speaker 5Stop by the store and eat some Doritos and some bunions . Oh , I seriously I couldn't drive . I mean it made me need it's almost like it was just , I mean it was floating stuff gotta do what you gotta do went and got him a crave case white castle when you went home , I said man , we need to test this stuff . It's the best stuff I ever had well , when you went home , did , donna ?
Speaker 3I remember telling him . I said man , we need to test this stuff .
Speaker 5This is the best stuff I ever had . Well , when you went home , did Donna notice anything different about you ?
Speaker 5Oh it's forever ago , because he had to take me back to our undercover headquarters . I had to log me in because every night was overtime . Yeah , in fact , at one point they called me and told me to start taking comp time because I was going to make more than the sheriff . Because you know you're a kid , you're out there , I'm working . I'll tell you , seven days a week , 15 hours a day . You know you're out , you go to school , I'm driving a half hour through school and then you got through school and then you go out and party with the kids .
Speaker 2Plus you got football practice .
Speaker 5Yeah , party with the kids . Plus , you got football practice , yeah right . And then you got to go back to your undercover place and log the evidence in , write the report and get them to go home until midnight .
Speaker 4So how did it work with school work and assignments and things ? Did the teachers not start catching on when you weren't turning things in , or was it ?
Speaker 5No , I put overtime in for doing homework .
Speaker 3That's awesome , that's commitment . Yeah , that is .
Speaker 4That is commitment .
Speaker 2Did your wife get in , because you know she was the one doing it .
Speaker 5Yeah , she would have got too good a grade because you had to miss a bunch of task . You had to miss a bunch of , but it's funny though , I did learn how to type my second time too , because I didn't know how to type when I finished high school .
Speaker 2What grade are you in ? 14th , that is awesome . Should have went to Votek while you were in there welding or something .
Speaker 5I forgot what I was supposed to say . The one I was taking perineum in the second time . The first time I don't remember what I was taking . I was like I started out vocational and then they switched me over . So you get to know both kids , but vocational kids were always in more trouble than the regular kids . That's just life . Then they switched me over . So you get to know both kids , but vocational kids , usually we're always in more trouble than the regular kids .
Speaker 4That's just life that's fun I don't think they do operations like that . I try .
Speaker 2Well , I set up
America's Most Wanted Cases
Speaker 2a scene anymore because all the social media .
Speaker 5If you don't have a past , then what's gonna believe who you are ?
Speaker 2well , that's true , you would have to really fabricate some , some social media background and the closest I ever got to any 21 jump street stuff was me and joe that we had a horrible time with some pot sales in the school . I was working and he was like this kid . I got him and busted him a little bit . I said man , I called the detective . I said I can get more here at school . We got to stop this . He said all right . He said there's enough cameras in them schools . Just make sure he doesn't go in a bathroom or somewhere off camera that we can do this . So I prepped this kid . I was like just meet in the hallway , do a quick exchange and go straight in the bathroom . But that's what you get when you I'm done yeah .
Speaker 2so we made the bus and I didn't charge the kid , I just went and said hey , I know what you did , don't do it no more . So it was I swung and missed . There you go what do you ?
Speaker 5do they hardly ever go as planned ? No , not at all .
Speaker 2Especially with the clientele I was dealing with . You can't go to the special classes and do that stuff .
Speaker 4They don't follow directions as well . No , it was fun After your 21 Jump Street . What did you get into after that ?
Speaker 5I went back to my little hometown of Lackland back then that was like 84 , end of 84 . And just started doing regular patrol work .
Speaker 2I bet that was kind of hard to go from detective work starting off to back on the road a little bit . I mean adjustment .
Speaker 5Well , for me it wasn't back on the road . I went from the jail to the tech , so being on the road was new for me . I like it , it was fun . I always thought it was good when you work in your hometown . It was for me starting out because I knew literally everyone . I knew most of people's parents and grandparents . Half a lot was from Mount Vernon , that's true .
Speaker 3That's right .
Speaker 5Yeah , I mean we had Sterns and Fosters there and they brought so many people up there for jobs .
Speaker 2Yeah , they went up there for P&G Right .
Speaker 5P&G , sterns and Fosters . Ge had just started . Ge . Yep , and there was also a place called Philip Carey that made shingles , and Fox Paper Company and other . They made the playing cards .
Speaker 4Yes .
Speaker 5And that little town had , let's see , 5,000 people and 15,000 jobs . I mean , there was jobs everywhere there .
Speaker 2Yep . That was a ghost town , by the way , there is so many people from right here in this area of Kentucky that went there . Yeah , and then some , you know , some of them come back and it was weird . Yeah , my grandpa , you know , went back to Union College down here . Good friend of mine he's like yeah , my , my papa was from Knox County , right here in Barberville . I came back to Union College played baseball . So they come back .
Speaker 3Yeah , they do come back .
Speaker 5Yeah , a lot of that , but anyway . So I knew everybody in the town and I was an athlete in high school , so I knew everybody in all Because Lachlan we had a working class , everybody worked the factory . Then we had a north end where it was the , the proctor , gamble and ge stern foster executives , and then we had our west lakland side , so we had like a little triangle of different people and and I don't know cult , I want to say cultures , but I guess it was because you had the appellations . You had , uh , I don't know where the North Lackaw people were from actually , and then we had our black community . So it was like three different towns there .
Speaker 3So a lot of interesting things went on there , I'm sure .
Speaker 2Oh yeah , what's the population when you were patrolling ? How many people lived out there then ?
Speaker 5I think it was like 5,000 . And now it's under . I think it's under three now . It's a ghost town Wow .
Speaker 3Well , all the factories have gone .
Speaker 5Yeah , yeah , all the business is gone , because only the other business were there , because the factory was there , so they're gone . It really is like a ghost town .
Speaker 2Yeah , how close are you to the IKEA that we have to go to all the time ? About miles up ?
Speaker 5yeah , I've been right there when you come south and you go between those walls . That's where Lachlan is ah , I gotcha right next to rating yes , correct .
Speaker 2Yeah , I've been to Colerain some , I had a friend that lived up there and hmm . But I don't know the greater Cincinnati area that good besides , like Boone County and Florence and stuff .
Speaker 5Yeah , it was pretty much , which is just the first 12 miles of Cincinnati . And then you hit four different like Loughlin , evenedale , sharonville and then Westchester , and then the other way to go is 71 . Yeah , wow . And then you hit four different like Lachlan , evandale , sharonville and then Westchester , and then the other way to go is 71 .
Speaker 2Yeah , wow .
Speaker 5Hmm , anyway . So yeah , I was there and did my time as patrolman and then you know the little town there . When you used to catch a case , it was your case . You worked it from start to finish . Yeah , I mean , it was then later . If you had difficulty , it was like a , uh , somebody who would be assigned detective . I wound up getting that , getting that later , uh , but a lot of times I you get your case , you just work it that's how a lot of our cases we get to work from start to finish .
Speaker 4But if it's something big I mean like a big burglary , big monetary value of stabbing or shooting or something it's one of those you do the initial and then hand it off .
Speaker 3But but how many officers were on the street at that time mark when you were there ?
Speaker 5oh , we , uh .
Speaker 2well , I think we only had 17 guys when I started , so it's 5,000 people , but they were policing probably all the people coming to the factories that lived at their places . Right , Is that how that ?
Speaker 5kind of went . Yeah , for the most part we had . Well , the chief was there in the daytime all the time , but most days we would have two on the road , but then probably two or three times a week we'd have three , you know , depending on vacations and how the ship was working , whatever , but for the most part it was two guys . Well , you know , unlike being in Kentucky where you have the , you know , you guys call them counties down there we call them cities , but you know , ratty and Wyoming , they're literally a minute and two minutes away . They're literally a minute and two minutes away . So , even though we had our own little community to serve , the other police departments were so close . It wasn't like we couldn't handle it .
Speaker 3If you needed help , they'd come and do whatever , like a mutual aid thing .
Speaker 5Oh yeah , correct . Sometimes the mutual aid guy would get there before your guy would get there , yep .
Speaker 4Was there a high call volume or high call volume there ?
Speaker 5well listen so we were one of the smallest communities , actually , because we went down to a village and we later on , because we used to have our own dispatchers and so they were on there during the daytime too . But and it was a full policeman who answered the phone in case somebody came on station , and it was always the older guys that got to do that , or I should say , had to do that . Yeah , yeah , I never got to answer the phone .
Speaker 4Yeah .
Speaker 5But then we switched over to the Haymore County Communication Center when the 911 system came out and we wound up getting the most calls of anybody they had . I mean , there were townships that were five times our size and we would get more calls . That's interesting . But you know , I said we had i-75 going right too , so you had the accidents that could match a lot of people , you know . And we had , uh , like I said before , the phone , even though our little town was 80 percent locked . It was 80% . White Lincoln Heights was the biggest all-black community in the United States back then , and so we had people traveling back and forth from Cincinnati and so we always had calls . We were busy all the time .
Speaker 3Did Lincoln Heights have their own police department ?
Speaker 5Yes , now they're patrolled by the Hamilton County Sheriff's Department now , but they disbanded . But yes , they had their own , okay , and they only had two guys on too , most of the time .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 5And , like I said , because of Mutual Aid , we would back them up a lot . Yeah .
Speaker 2So you went to . How long did you do ? Were you there before you went to the county ?
Speaker 5no , I was in the county first okay , I got and then I went there yeah , for the in 84 to 96 , 97 , somewhere in there , when I won , when I won my job back and then and then retired that's still .
Speaker 4That's . That's . That's amazing .
Speaker 5Yeah , that's awesome and , by the way , the official thing was I retired .
Speaker 2Yeah , man , it's a good feeling to retire , isn't it , doug ? It is yes . I'll let y'all know in about 30 years .
Speaker 3If you can put up with it that long . If I can put up with it that long .
Speaker 4If it don't keep changing man with it that long , if it don't keep changing . Man , so I've been . I've tried to read through some of your crazy cop stories that you put on Facebook . Did most of those happen in Laughlin .
Speaker 5Or surrounding , yes , okay , well , I think some of them . You saw chases I would chase somebody into Lincoln Heights , or I think two of them I've already posted were actually in Arnican Heights , which is next door . The house fire one and , if you remember , the pizza one , those were both Arnican Heights , next door to me .
Speaker 2You care to share some of the stories with us on this , so we can promote that on your Facebook too . So let's hear some of them well , the , the , the fire one .
Speaker 5So we get a daytime call to a fire and we get there and it was in the other town next to me and we pretty much got there at the same time and this house was fully engulfed and there's some lady on the second floor yelling out a window I need help , I need help . And she had to wait 275 , 300 , easy . And so in those little towns they had their own fire departments , which is great at night because everybody's home , but daytime they're not , everybody's not there . So you could be a while for a daytime fire . Uh , because there was no full-time firefighters . I think it's working or something . Yep .
Speaker 5And so we get there and , and I don't know , I read I'm looking around the back door to try and see , and that's on fire too . I happen to see a ladder on a neighbor's house , so I just grab it right around the front . We both climb up the top . We're trying to help us . Yeah , she goes . I'm not going without my cat . I'm like get out here , come on , it's going . I'm not leaving without my cat . I'm like , oh my god . So I said get out of the way . So I jump in , I'm crawling because there's this smoke's rolling out and it's one of those things . And there was , one door was open and one was closed . I wasn't going to open another one because I was afraid of a flashover . We call them a back draft yeah , yeah , I was worried about that .
Speaker 5So luckily I found that cat and I went out the window to the other policeman and then this lady . She was so big , I'm telling you , she almost couldn't fit through the window and there was no way . So he's grabbing her on her shoulders and I'm stuck with her fat ass , no way . So he's trying to . He's grabbing her on her shoulders and I'm stuck with her fat ass pushing her , trying to push her out the window .
Speaker 2I got I got the .
Speaker 4I got the bad end of that deal that's one of those days when you really start to rethink your career .
Speaker 5Why did I go in ? Where was the other guys down here that could have went in ? She was my wife . I had to go through her to get out .
Speaker 5So I mean we wind up pushing her out to get her out on the roof . And I'll be honest with you , I had lunch with the guy I'm sorry , drinks with the guy about three weeks ago when we were talking about this story and he's like , oh yeah , I remember that and we're talking about the cat and everything and she wouldn't leave . And I remember I said how did you know , I think when we got done , how the fire department just showed up and we're sitting on the roof but there was no way we're getting . She's going down that ladder and the house is seriously and I mean there's flames coming out of the windows , not smoke flames , and we're sitting on that roof . So I'm like fire department was up and I get down and I said do you know how they got her off their roof ? Because I think I left and he don't remember he kind of thinks a running department came over with a fire bucket and got her out because the other two didn't lock it on it and didn't have one of those buckets .
Speaker 4I don't think I never didn't know how to get off that roof and he didn't remember it either but she got out evidently oh yeah , yeah , she did , and so did her damn cat you don't see yeah you don't think about that , though , but you know heavier set people , there's some logistical issues on on if you've got to get out of the house quick and I think it's one of the things she she was so big , she lived on the second floor .
Speaker 5I think she had an enabler , because I don't think she even got out of the house . I mean , there's no way that lady was going up and down those steps every day you end up with a what's eaten Gilbert Grape type of situation . Yeah , there's no way she was going up and down those steps every day . She had to be . Somebody had to be bringing her food . That was somebody's sugar mama .
Speaker 4What's another one we got I ?
Speaker 5was telling you about so we're watching this house for a while and people used to just call me random because I grew up in the area like , hey , this guy is selling weed whatever he was selling by the pound , though we're watching . For a while we did a trash job on him , which means you go through the garbage and find some pie . But we're like , wait until he's got something . After watching him , so we start throwing him one day and he's got a little baby . He's got like I don't know five or six year old or something , and we start following and he keeps goes this other little town and he keeps getting out of the car , running through the house with a diaper bag , but even the kids in the car , and I'm like , oh my god , we're watching him make all these deliveries . I'm like , oh my God , we're watching him make all these deliveries . He was dropping off the pot or we're following him .
Speaker 5We're like , okay , so go get a search warrant . He goes back home . We go in Okay , do the search warrant , go in , it's non-violent , he's got two kids there . We get in there , we find $4,000 or $5,000 in cash and a couple pounds of pot and we're sitting there . Well , the guy is wife work , second shift so he was always ordering food in . So the pizza guy comes in and we all this money on this table and he's living the pizza . He goes hey , you know , my wife's still at work , you care if I feed my kids , I got to pay for the pizza . I'm like , yeah , sure , go ahead . He grabs a $100 bill and hands it to the pizza guy and says keep the change . He said I ain't getting that money back . That little 17-year-old boy couldn't have been more happy .
Speaker 3He was like , yeah , heck yeah , get the liver here more often , no joke .
Speaker 2When you get out buddy .
Speaker 5I said you know what you can keep it , that's worth the story . That's classic , but you know , like I said , every policeman that has 100 stories like that . They're all out there . I'm just stupid enough to put them on there . And like I , told Doug , they're the best ones . We can't even tell .
Speaker 4That's a lot of it . We've always before a lot of these with our guests , especially guys that we've worked with .
Speaker 5They sit down and say say well , what stories can we tell that you know ain't gonna get us indicted later and the statute of limitations ran out on mine , but I still got some friends who are working , so I can't , still can't do it yeah , you gotta watch for that too .
Speaker 4You don't want to incriminate them .
Speaker 2I've had several , I'm not going on there , I ain't going to prison for that . I was like come on , man , either tell them or I'm going to tell them , you get on here you start talking about it , you realize they're not as bad as what you think .
Speaker 3I'd say a lot of the stuff we've done . It wouldn't you ?
Speaker 4operate in the gray .
Speaker 2Yeah , it wouldn't . I think through it all , through this podcast and stuff and hearing some of these stories , it's been therapy , but it's also , you know , it's just good for to shed a light on the human side of policing . We didn't put ourselves in it . Somebody put us in this position to have to deal with your shenanigans and your stupidity . We're just the ones that answered the call .
Speaker 5Yeah , you show up where you're told , and all of a sudden stupid stuff happens it always amazes me .
Speaker 4You know the cops that think outside the box on stuff , on how to handle stuff . They'd be like , well , I wouldn't have thought of that . They solved the problem in a way that I would have never thought .
Speaker 2Everybody's got their own way .
Speaker 5That was one of my stories . Well , this had to do with pizza too . That was one of my stories . Well , this had to do with pizza too . So I had some connection because I worked in the county . I knew a lot of people . I quarterbacked
From Police Work to Entrepreneurship
Speaker 5a football team . I knew a lot of people in the city and the county and so I had a connection at Cincinnati Bell and this is days before the age of myself , here before caller ID and all that stuff you got nowadays . So , anyway , they're working on this homicide case before caller ID and all that stuff you got nowadays . So anyway , they're working on this homicide case .
Speaker 5And one of the guys working on our department I didn't like too much and I was actually ordered not to work on this case actually , but anyway , there was a BCI , which is Bureau of Criminal Investigation , here in Ohio . He was also working on the case because it was a homicide and the detective that was working on our department asked me hey , I know you got this connection that says St Bill . They had his phone number that was supposed to help solve his homicide . And he said can you call your connection and get this address for us ? I like , nah , I don't want , I don't want to wake them up , it's just , it's it's after midnight . Um , now , and then the other guy I like to be ci investigator . He came in smart , can you , can you get this number for us ? I go okay , let me see what I can do .
Speaker 5So I really didn't want to because I had the person I had to call I had to didn't have to call in and get the number and then get called back . And you know , I didn't want to because the person I had to call didn't have to call in and get the number and get called back and I didn't want to go through all that stuff . So I'm sitting there and I'm like , okay , and it just popped in my mind because I'm thinking outside the box . So I pick up the phone and in Cincinnati there's a place called La Rosa's Pizza . They always advertise 347-111 pizza .
Speaker 5So I call there's a place called La Rosa's Pizza and they always advertise 347-111-14-PIZZA . So I call , I got the phone , the guy gives me the phone number , I pick up , he walks into the other room and I walk in and I call the pizza . I said hey , I want to order a pizza . He said what's your phone number ? I gave it to him . He said okay , just know what I moved , what address do you have ? And they gave me the address , that's awesome , that is awesome .
Speaker 4That is definitely thinking outside the box .
Speaker 5So I literally went back in to that BCI guy and in one minute he gave him that address . He goes hey , Mark , I'm sitting back here . What did you do ? I back here , what'd you do ? I said what do you mean ? He said you didn't have time . No one had time to you called somebody . They didn't have time to call and have somebody else get that number and call you back . How'd you do that ? I said I can't get away with my sources , man , laughter a magician never reveals his tricks .
Speaker 4That's right , that's awesome . So you had two cases that ended up on America's Most Wanted , or two perks , well , two perks .
Speaker 5The one guy I'm just waiting to say this Well , yeah , I think one's dead . He got killed after they aired it that night . Oh wow , he was driving from . I always forget . I think he was driving from Lexington to Louisville or Louisville to Lexington . He had a shootout with a policeman . Well , the official .
Speaker 5The official story was he did himself , but I think it was just protection because he was a uh big wig and a motorcycle gang and uh , yeah , a couple , couple running , because you know those motorcycle guys always have their main , they call them the main squeeze . Their girlfriend was from our town . You know most of the guys always have their main . They call them the main squeeze .
Speaker 5Their girlfriend was from our town and a couple of thirds of his guys . So one day I got information and he was actually on there for attempted murder of a Sharonville policeman . He got in a fight , took his gun away , tried to shoot him and luckily it didn't fire .
Speaker 1And he got put in jail and they made a mistake and he got out .
Speaker 5So he was out running around and we knew his main girlfriend was in our town . So one night this will be a quick one I set up . I said , okay , here's where he's at . It's a one-way street in my neighborhood . I'm seriously behind my house where I grew up and down three doors . I know this neighborhood . There's a dead-end street . So I'm sitting back there in the back and I got another officer coming up because he could only go down the dead end street and make a left because the other two were dead in . I said , well , when you only lover will have him cornered . I'm sitting there thinking like this is the worst plan ever , because when , when the other guy pulls in front of him , please pulls the front he's getting his gun out . And this guy's coming out with a gun and they're both pointing to me and I said this , this is not , this is not good at all . And so I said okay , stay here , just in case this comes out , I'll circle back around . And I made a phone call and then I wound up that the guy somehow he got information that we were there and he wound up backing back out the one-way street . That's how he got away that night . That was a good thing .
Speaker 5And then another one . So I get information from somebody and says , hey , this guy is , he's on the FBIS-1 list but he's got fake ID and everything and he's on an airplane down to New Orleans to meet with the sons of somebody down in , our sons of whatever it is down New Orleans . Uh , blacker gang , down there he's with the president , the vice president . They're wearing their colors , he's wearing a suit . He doesn't have his gun on him . I'm like , okay , so I'm just locking a little small town community . I called down to New Orleans and talked to some guy . Hey , look , this guy is on his plane and he's wearing colors . He's not wearing colors . The other two guys are wearing colors . I said just catch him when he gets off the plane . Well , this sergeant I talked to down there stops the plane on the tarmac , gets everybody off , but the two guys in colors . So he walked out , he got away . The chief calls me on Monday and says Mark , did you have an airplane stopped in New Orleans ? I said I said he goes , what are ?
Speaker 5you doing ? I said he goes . What are you doing ? I said , listen , he's the most wanted guy in the country right now and I had information that he was there and I can prove it and luckily I was able to verify that my information was correct and he was on the plane . But still to get called in by the chief like what are you doing ? You're a policeman , I'm stopping an airplane to do our leave . What are you doing ? You're a policeman , I'm stopping airplanes in .
Speaker 4New Orleans . You got to do what you got to do .
Speaker 5Yeah , yeah . And the other guy was oh , this is Chris . Guys , so I'm making a drug arrest and , besides being the 21 Jump Street , I rarely arrested juveniles . It was too much paperwork . I didn't like going to juvenile court . They most times didn't plead out . I didn't like to arrest juveniles .
Speaker 5It's still a giant pain in the butt , yeah , and so I usually didn't . I'd take them home , warn them , whatever . So I'm arrested this morning about maybe 14 , 13 . He was selling crack and some of the little kids had to be six , seven , eight and he knew I was . First of all , he should know who I was . But he did .
Speaker 5And he comes up , grandma's crush , telling me what to do and tossing at me . I'm like , get away from me . Who are you ? He says I know who you are , you can do this . And I'm like , god , what is this kid ? And so I got his name and I remember he stopped it and gave the other kids like , hey , man , here's a dollar . I heard he won't give you bus fare when I let you out . I'm like , what are you talking about ? So I'm like , okay , I don't know what this kid is , but I guess it was . That was the prototype . Huh , yeah , so .
Speaker 5So I go to school the next day and a guy I graduated , which was a , I think , assistant principal there or something . I said , hey , you have the antichrist coming up , because what I'm telling you this kid is I . And I've arrested his mom too because she had a crack house and I went in there one time and she didn't have a power on with this baby , shouldn't have the baby , but anyway , um , it goes years . I don't see him again . I don't know where he went to . He must have left lakland anyway .
Speaker 5So I'm driving down the street one day in lincoln heights and all of a sudden somebody else left the police and I about locked my car up , throwing it , throwing in park to get out . And I and and this was Jackson street , lincoln Heights , which was crack capital back then , I mean it was one of the biggest places anywhere in Ohio , probably anywhere by crack they were just lined up and I jump out and I said , hey , who wants to F me ? And it was like it was like the movie Meatballs Everybody backed up except this one guy . I looked around and backed up and he just stood there and I walked to him . I said , hey , you want to know he goes ? No , I said what's your name ?
Speaker 5And he told me I said yeah , I locked your mom up too . I remember you now and I kind of told him I kind of unjustly I unjustly meant a lot more than I should have , honestly but I was training a guy that day and this guy was a big guy , about a 6'8 guy , and I remember him saying
The Human Side of Policing
Speaker 5that is the coolest thing I've ever seen . We all just took a step back and just four kids standing there . And then so , last word , a couple more years I'm watching TV . We all just took a step back and just four kids standing there . And then so , after a couple more years I'm watching TV like sure enough , he's wanted for three different murders , one in Ohio , one in Illinois and he came back to Ohio and murdered somebody else wow , wow that was a happening town up there sounds like oh yeah , like I said , we were the most , we were the busiest in Hanwell County .
Speaker 5That's crazy , that is unbelievable .
Speaker 3And by the way .
Speaker 5I worked there because I had kids and I liked coaching my kids and being with my kids so I would trade all my first . We had rotating shifts but I traded all my first and seconds for the third shift so I could be off and coach the kids and be there Second shift . You can't make any games First shift . You miss all the school stuff . So , yeah , I worked permanent third by choice , but that's where all the action was .
Speaker 3Yeah , that third shift is a hard shift , though .
Speaker 5Oh yeah , it takes two on your body .
Speaker 2It does . Me and Doug worked plenty of night shifts together . We did , yes , had a ball we did .
Speaker 5Yeah , that's the best thing about career on thirds yeah , that's the best thing there's no supervisors either no , and you just have brass and just having to be good friends with the supervisor . That's right the plus yeah we well , you know , most of the time time later in my career not even later , even younger I was usually one in charge , because all the old guys liked to work the dispatcher and then the other old guys liked to trade off for a shift . So most of the time I was the OIC .
Speaker 2Yeah , I remember going back to the F the police . I remember one time this juvenile up at the school I was working he had a tattoo . For some reason he decided to put F the cop . So I knew it was for me . I had to deal with him a bunch and he came out there and I guess the assistant principal said , hey , he's got a new tattoo that's got your name all over it . And I was like , oh , I looked at it and sure enough he did F the cop right above his mom Mom .
Speaker 2I love mom tattoo . Is that serious ?
Speaker 4Choices were made . They weren't good ones , but choices were made .
Speaker 2I was like , wow , I've rated higher than mom on that one . I was like I guess the regrets . Now I hope you got it covered .
Speaker 4We just arrested a guy the other day that has F the police tattooed down his spine . Wow Of course they took pictures why ?
Speaker 5would you know , I wonder if his boyfriend in prison put that on him .
Speaker 4He's definitely holding somebody's pocket right now .
Speaker 3It's funny , so do you miss it mark uh , yeah , I mean it was .
Speaker 5I say this and unfortunately for my brother office , today , they , they can't have the fun that we used to oh no no , no , I mean I'd have my own TV show or be in jail myself .
Speaker 4No , we've talked about that many times . I started in 2016 and it's changed so much just from then , let alone from what it used to be prior to that . It's not the same job anymore .
Speaker 5No , not even close , and back then we had pretty much full support and Kentucky's still strong , but Cincinnati's a disaster right now .
Speaker 4Oh yeah , yeah , I couldn't imagine . Yeah , we've been pretty lucky , pretty blessed to be . I mean you've got a lot . You know you're a loud minority , but the majority is still pretty well .
Speaker 2I heard a protest today while I was working . They were out . The elderly bunch were protesting the new Big , beautiful Beagle . It was all in their 70s and 80s out there holding a coffin up . What are they protesting it for ? I guess they think they're going to lose their Social Security .
Speaker 4They protest all the time up there I was just like , wow , that's 78 hauling a coffin around .
Speaker 2I was like , well , they don't quite get ready to have to use that thing . I hope it's a good one .
Speaker 4It's like the old couple that I dealt with the other day . They're like 75 , both of them they're fighting and feuding , wanting a divorce . Wanting , I mean domestication .
Speaker 3I was like if y'all just wait a couple years , you won't have to worry about none of this . Just let nature take its course .
Speaker 4Yeah , you go to your room , you go to yours .
Speaker 2So what year did you retire in then ?
Speaker 596 . So what year did you retire in ? Then uh , 96 , but I , uh , I had a year off , where then I won my job back in 97 , and then that's when I started but then you , uh , then you kind of went into your own business , is that right ? Yeah , I created a little sports uh morning goods item . I did pretty well on .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 5So what's so ? Whenever girls play sports , they always roll their t-shirt sleeves up . Oh yeah , I got a patent little Basically . It's a Velcro strap that wraps around and holds the sleeves up , and we put soccer balls on them , softballs on them .
Speaker 4Wow , that's awesome . I never thought of that , but I mean , that's how you make money .
Speaker 2Thinking of something somebody needs .
Speaker 5I think we sold like 8 million of them . Oh my gosh Geez , dumb cop gets lucky .
Speaker 2I would . I'm dumber , I'm going to make billions . I wouldn't say that's gotta be a way . I'm gonna make billions . I wouldn't say that's too dumb created a product that sold millions .
Speaker 5Well , congratulations yeah , it was fun , right . What's my wife doing with me the whole time ? I don't know how she put up with it , but she did she's a good and I love her to death yep you got some good youngins too .
Speaker 3I love them today well , I'm on .
Speaker 5Jury's still out on them for me you get to be .
Speaker 3I mean , I heard you're getting ready to be a new grandpa yeah , I am now .
Speaker 4The grandkids are awesome I love them oh my gosh well , would you go back and do it all over again ?
Speaker 3if the situation was different .
Speaker 4The kid part no the police policing I don't know if we want you to answer the kid part .
Speaker 2They may listen to this podcast .
Speaker 5Yeah , the police thing . Yeah , it was fun and it was entertainment and it was always doing something .
Speaker 4Front row seat to the greatest show in the world .
Speaker 5Yep , you know it's funny because I got to the point and Nala can get on me if she listens to this because she's egotistical . Sometimes I am , but sometimes I felt like I was putting on a show for those residents here . I was like I was always chasing people and just doing stupid stuff , like I'd go down the street , one-way street , the wrong way a lot , because the dope boys were always looking the other way . That's right , used it to your advantage . Did I pull up and I just stand there with them ? They didn't know what they like . They can't make no money . I sit there like , well , I'm either gonna pull away and then I'm gonna get called here . I'm just gonna stand here and make them leave .
Speaker 4That's awesome .
Speaker 2It's fun stuff .
Speaker 3Did you ever have any problems , any fights with anybody or anything like that ?
Speaker 5Oh my gosh , yeah , a lot . I put one on the one . On the one on the crazy cop thing . I put that one on there For some reason , I don't know why , I chased a lot of people . I'm talking the one on the crazy cop thing . I put that one on there . But yeah , if for some reason , I don't know why , I chased a lot of people , I'm talking , you know if , if a policeman , I would guess most places , if you're in a real full pursuit , I know what people , what do you ? What do you think somebody does a career 10 or 15 . Yeah , yeah , I , I well above 50 , 50 to 75 .
Speaker 3Wow , I was chasing people .
Speaker 5And same with car chases . I mean , I mean real car chases where you're going , well , you can't do any more , like 100 miles an hour or flying through . You know , back then you could go , you could run through , I mean with caution , stop signs and red lights and stuff , you know , with your sirens and lights on . But I was in . We also had 75 going right down there , so I had a bunch of those involved , but I was always in . I don't know . Just because we're working third shift .
Speaker 3Yeah , third shift was a . That's when that criminal element is most active .
Speaker 4And if you were a proactive officer , then that's I mean that plays the most part of it . If you're out there looking for it , you're going to find it .
Speaker 5It is yes , oh , yeah , yeah , and then , when you weren't looking for it , it'd find you .
Speaker 4That's exactly right . When you're trying to take a break , it falls in your lap .
Speaker 2No rest for the wicked Episode two with me and Doug .
Speaker 5Go ahead , I'm listening , oh , go ahead . No , go ahead . I'm listening , oh , go ahead no , go ahead , go ahead .
Speaker 2No , you need to go back and listen to episode two with me and doug and dylan , where we've gotten a car chase just accidentally it's .
Speaker 3It's pretty classic okay , I'll do that , so I'll tell you what ?
Speaker 5I'll tell you one of my fights . So this younger officer in the police department next door I'm not gonna say his name , um , anyway , he's asking me how are you getting all these chases ? All the time You're always running chasing somebody and foot chasing and stuff . I said I'm just out there , man . If you're out there , you know a lot of guys sit in the station . I'm out there , I get bored , I can't just sit in here all day .
Speaker 5And so finally , about a week or two later , he first ever car chase and he's screaming on the radio like he'd never heard anything before . You know , I would be like finding a 31 in pursuit . I'd find a bunch of location , I'd say South by Wayne Avenue , approaching whatever car it was , and just keep calm about it . He's yelling and screaming like oh my God , you can't even tell him where I was . Well , I figure like okay , I know where this is going to wind up at , screaming like oh my god , you came . I couldn't even tell him where I was . Well , I figured like okay , I know , we're just gonna wind up at .
Speaker 5So I go up that area , I'm sitting there here . It comes , he goes by me so he didn't know I'm there and they , they jump out and let the car roll , which you know . You gotta stay with the car and make sure it doesn't hit anybody else , for another car , whatever . So he had a little gap in there , so those guys take off running through these woods . So no one knows . I'm still there . I'm like a ninja , I'm , I'm following , I catch the first and the guys don't know I'm chasing them either . I catch the first guy , throw him over and I handcuff him to a fence and go after second guy . Don't even tell anybody I've done it yet , because he's still screaming on the damn radio , and so finally he's yelling down 5-11-31, . I'm in pursuit of male block and I got him to gunpoint and he's handcuffed to a fence .
Speaker 3You'd already caught the guy .
Speaker 5I already caught the guy handcuffed . Then he told me I was there and was on after the next guy and he switches over to channel two and starts cussing me out because channel two only goes like a half mile radius and channel one goes county wide Because he knew I was down Because his disappointment in that radio . I wish I had somehow got that back in the day .
Speaker 5And he's got him a gun before he's already handcuffed to a fence . So so the other guy , the other guy gets over that fence and , uh , it's late , it's 4 , 35 o'clock in the morning and it was a rumor . I said , hey , you guys go tell them where I was . Then I said set up a mirror . Hey , we're going to call in a dog . I'm like I'm not waiting on no damn talk . I mean , they come from Forest Park and they set up and it just takes forever . I'm like I ain't got time for this . It's not even my town anymore . It already started . It went through lock and end up in Lincoln Heights . I ain't , I ain't part of this , except I arrested that guy . So I'm like and you get here , you get here , and what are you gonna do ? I said watch this . I yell , release the dog . I go . Guy gets up and takes off to the gate asking to get out , before the dog got there . Oh my gosh .
Speaker 2Fun stuff .
Speaker 5That's great . Like I said , if you want a quick solution to something , find the laziest guy , because I just wasn't waiting . That's exactly right .
Speaker 4That reminds me we talked about juveniles , dealing with them . Not want to deal with them , but I just thought of this story . We , uh , we had a problem with juveniles running off from was it sunrise , sun , sunlight , whatever it was . They'd run off all the time . They had this group there and they was . Every time we deal with them . They was the mouthiest . I mean , they just knew that we couldn't do anything with them and and you can't . And then so we get in foot pursuit of them and they run across how rogers parkway and they run down in the woods . Well , we'd been down in the woods and we , so we jumped the guardrail and they're running down down that way . We just stop because there's a string of barbed wire fence about chest high that they didn't see . And we do a pat , we just stop . Clothes lining , clothes lining . And they're yelling F you pigs . All this stuff you'll never catch them .
Speaker 2Good for them , that's funny you'll ever catch some of them , good for them . Oh , that's funny . Well , this has been a fun podcast . I really appreciate it .
Speaker 5Oh , no problem , I'd love to bring up some of the old memories . Oh yeah , well , that's what it's all about .
Speaker 4That's what I mean . We got into this to tell these old stories . When I started , everybody told me said you need to write down , and kind of diary , these stories and encounters . And I would say that for everybody anybody starting out or anything to write these things down Because , you're right , every cop has a million of these stories and it's hard to remember them all . But when you do finally sit down and start talking with other cops or friends and bring them all up , I mean you can go on for hours and it's they're always funny and always , always fun to listen to that's what I started doing .
Speaker 5My crazy cop stories was like I said I need to put some of this stuff down somewhere my grandkids are reading on or something .
Speaker 4Yes , yeah yeah , that's uh that's what we can . We can do with this podcast A lot of our , I mean . If nothing else , it's at least a record of all these stories that we can go back and listen to and people can pass on and not be forgotten .
Speaker 5Any officers listening ? I wouldn't suggest writing it all down , because you'd wind up getting indicted too .
Speaker 4Well , that's true . Yeah , you've got to be selective . Some stuff that only you and Jesus need to know about that's funny .
Speaker 3Later on in the academy , I think they kind of wanted you to keep a journal . Yeah , and I know Jason Van Hook , he'd write everything down .
Speaker 4Yeah , he had notebooks full of stuff , of funny stuff . Yeah , we'd . We'd always joked around at the pd of of making a a bathroom book and it was just each . Each story is just exactly one poop long of all our police stories , Long stories .
Speaker 2your legs go numb yeah . Oh my gosh .
Speaker 4Well , Mark , we've enjoyed it . I've thoroughly enjoyed it .
Speaker 5Your stories are hilarious Thanks for having me on . If you ever need a follow-up , give me a call ?
Speaker 4Absolutely yeah , we'll call you back . If you think of some more , we'll reload and restart again .
Speaker 3Might even make a road trip .
Speaker 2Yeah , we'll come up .
Speaker 5Oh , that would be fun , or you could come down here either one . Oh , you know what I could do , that maybe .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 4You're not in Mount Vernon .
Speaker 3Yeah , just uh you just about 20 minutes . Yes , we're not far
Closing Thoughts and Reflections
Speaker 3from that . You was here once before . What did you come down when dad passed away ?
Speaker 5no , I think Donna did . I don't know if I was out of town . Donna did no , you were at the funeral home , I believe was I yeah , I believe so yes , I remember them , damn cop stories , but I can't remember the rest of my life .
Speaker 3Well , I can't remember what I had for lunch today so , oh my gosh , that's the way it goes . When you was talking about I can't find that text I said I think it was a response on one of your stories and then you said oh yeah , that's right , I'm old , it's funny .
Speaker 5I'll tell you this quick . I did a concrete job on my sidewalk last week , and a buddy of mine same age as me , we're out there . It took us five hours work combined , but we wasted probably I don't know a good 30 minutes each . We'd put something down a pencil or a hammer or a damn tape measure and we'd spend half the time looking around for stuff that was right there .
Speaker 3That's when you know .
Speaker 2Either you know it , it or you hire it it got done .
Speaker 4You don't have to worry about the journey , it's about the destination okay well , guys , thanks again for having me yeah , that was fun .
Speaker 3Thank you so much yeah , mark , come down and see us sometime , alright see you , be safe guys .
Speaker 5Alright guys , hope you all enjoyed that down soon I'll keep doing that , all right , see you . See you , mark . Take care , be safe guys . You too .
Speaker 4All right guys . Hope you all enjoyed that . We'll catch you on the next one . I took the pretty side .