Sherlock Holmes Alone
Even the world's greatest detective has to retire at some point. Sherlock Holmes has done just that. He has decided to wind down and settle down in a cozy and somewhat lonely villa in Sussex near the village of Fulworth. He has given up entirely to that soothing life of Nature for which he had so often yearned during the long years spent amid the gloom of London. Holmes, his housekeeper and his bees have the estate all to themselves.
Yes, the super sleuth has become a bee keeper! He spends his days caring for his buzzing charges, walking along the chalk cliffs, or exploring the admirable beaches with their splendid swimming pools that are filled afresh with each tide.
It is a peaceful and calm life for a man who has lived so much adventure and danger. But sometime Holmes does long for the old days. The heady days of investigation and intrigue. At this point in his life his friend and partner John Watson has passed almost beyond his keen having married and settled down in his own right. So where does Holmes turn? With whom will he share his stories and memories? He will share them with you!
Alone in his great book filled garret Holmes will dig deep into his personal records and the notes made by Dr. Watson to share his own view on his famous cases. It may be surprising to find out just how close Holmes own recollections mirror Watson's. Holmes will recount to you his most memorable cases and his most fierce opponents. Join us as we explore one of the greatest minds of all time here on SHERLOCK HOLMES ALONE.
Sherlock Holmes Alone
Episode II - Alone With the Woman: A Scandal In Bohemia
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What happens when the world's greatest detective meets his intellectual match? Join us as we unravel the captivating tale of Sherlock Holmes and Irene Adler, the woman who managed to outsmart him and earn his profound respect. This episode promises to reveal the depths of Holmes's admiration for Adler, a woman who defies his perception of logic and emotion, becoming an enigma in his otherwise calculated world. Discover the intricacies of their relationship, set against the backdrop of Holmes's solitary life at Baker Street amidst a vibrant tapestry woven with tales of mystery and deductive brilliance.
Step into the suspenseful world of Holmes's latest challenge as we explore the Bohemian nobleman's cryptic case. Witness Holmes's extraordinary powers of deduction, from deciphering Watson's recent escapades to unraveling foreign correspondences linked to nobility and intrigue. With an unexpected visitor on the horizon, suspense builds, promising revelations that could alter the course of the investigation. As Holmes prepares to meet the visitor, his strategic brilliance shines through, setting the stage for a thrilling chase.
Experience the cunning and strategy behind the infamous Briony Lodge incident. Holmes's mastery of disguise and Watson's unwavering support lead to a gripping narrative filled with unexpected twists and strategic brilliance. Holmes's clever orchestration of a house fire deception ultimately leads to a surprising outcome, as Irene Adler's wit and cunning turn the tables on Holmes. This episode beautifully captures the interplay of intellect and respect between Holmes and Adler, ending with a testament to the power of human ingenuity and intelligence.
Sherlock Holmes Alone, episode 2. Alone with the Woman. A Scandal in Bohemia Brought to you by Credanthe Audio Theatre. To me she will always be the woman In my eyes. She eclipses and predominates the whole of her sex. It was not that I felt any emotion akin to love for Irina Adler. No, no. All emotions, and that one particularly, are abhorrent to what some may refer to as my cold, precise and at times at least balanced mind.
Speaker 1My good friend Watson once said that I am the most perfect reasoning and observing machine that the world has ever seen. I can neither confirm nor deny such a title, but I do try to approach things as the logician that I am, and so as a lover I would place myself in a false position. No, no, I tend to speak of those softer passions with a jib and a sneer. They are admirable things of the observer, excellent for drawing the veil from men's motives and actions. But for a trained reasoner such as myself, to admit such intrusions into my own delicate and finely adjusted temperament is to introduce a distracting factor which might throw a doubt upon my mental results. Is to introduce a distracting factor which might throw a doubt upon my mental results, grit in a sensitive instrument or a crack in one of my own high-powered lenses would not be more disturbing than a strong emotion in a nature such as mine. And yet I will admit that there is but one woman to me, and that woman is Irina Adler.
Speaker 1I had seen little of Watson lately. His marriage had drifted us apart from each other. His own complete happiness and the home-centred interests which rise up around the man who first finds himself master of his own establishment were sufficient to absorb all of his attention, while I, who loathe every form of society, with my entire bohemian soul, remained in our lodgings in Baker Street, buried among my old books and alternating from week to week between cocaine and ambition, using the former as a means to stimulate the latter. That being said, I had had rather a busy time of it. I had been summoned to Odessa in the case of the Trepoff murder, I cleared up the singular tragedy of the Atkinson brothers at Trimcomalee, and I had accomplished successful completion of a delicate mission for the reigning family of Holland. I was at a pause in activity, hence the cocaine versus ambition struggle. Of course, cocaine can become one's ambition if one is not careful.
Speaker 1One night it was on the 20th of March 1888, I was pacing the room rather swiftly and eagerly. My head sunk upon my chest and my hands clasped behind me. I had abstained from the needle and I was feeling a little restless. But fortunately I was feeling a little restless, but fortunately I was at work again. I had risen out of my drug-created mania and was hot upon the scent of a new problem. I heard the doorbell ring, the sound of familiar footfalls on the stairs, and moments later Watson strode into the apartment.
The Bohemian Nobleman Mystery
Speaker 1Good evening, my dear Holmes. I was passing and I was seized with a keen desire to see you again. I noticed from the street that your rooms were rather brilliantly lit and as I looked up I saw your tall spare figure pass twice in dark silhouette against the blind. Do you have time for a little company? Always a pleasure to see you, my dear Watson. Please take the armchair by the fire. Cigar, whiskey yes to both. Please. Wedlock suits you. Watson.
Speaker 1I think that you have put on seven and a half pounds since I saw you last, only seven, indeed. I should have thought a little more, just a trifle more. I fancy, watson, and in practice, again, you did not tell me you intended to go into harness. Then how do you know, I see it, I deduce it. How do I know that you have been getting yourself very wet lately and that you have a most clumsy and careless servant girl? My dear Holmes, this is too much. You would certainly have been burned had you lived. A most clumsy and careless servant girl, my dear Holmes, this is too much. You would certainly have been burned had you lived a few centuries ago.
Speaker 1It is true that I had a country walk on Thursday and came home in a dreadful mess, but as I have changed my clothes, I can't imagine how you deduce it. And as to Mary Jane, she is incorrigible and my wife has given a notice. But there again, I fail to see how you work it out. It is simplicity itself, watson. My eyes tell me that on the inside of your left shoe, just where the firelight strikes it, the leather is scored by six almost parallel cuts. Obviously they have been caused by someone who has very carelessly scraped round the edges of the soul in order to remove crusted mud from it. Hence you see my double deduction that you've been out in vile weather and that you have a particularly malignant boot-slitting specimen of the London Slavey.
Speaker 1As to your practice, if a gentleman walks into my room smelling of eidophone, with a black mark of nitrate of silver upon his right forefinger and a bulge on the right side of his top hat to show where he has secreted his stethoscope, I must be dull indeed if I do not pronounce him to be an active member of the medical profession. When I hear you give your reasons, the thing always appears to me to be so ridiculously simple that I could easily do it myself, though at each successive instance of your reasoning I'm baffled until you explain your process. And yet I believe my eyes are as good as yours. Quite so, watson, you see, but you do not observe. The distinction is clear. For example, you have frequently seen the steps which lead up from the hall to this room. Yes, frequently, how often? Well, some hundreds of times. Very good, watson. Then how many are there? How many, I don't know. Quite so you have not observed. And yet you have seen. That is just my point. Now I know that there are seventeen steps, because I have both seen and observed. By the way, since you are interested in these little problems, you may be interested in this.
Speaker 1I threw over a sheet of thick, pink-tinted notepaper which had been lying open upon the table. It came by the last post. The note is undated and without either signature or address. Read it aloud if you'd be so kind. Watson, there will call upon you tonight, at a quarter to eight o'clock, a gentleman who desires to consult you upon a matter of the very deepest moment. Your recent services to one of the royal houses of Europe have shown that you are one who may safely be trusted with matters which are of an importance which can hardly be exaggerated. This account of you we have, from all quarters, received. Be in your chamber, then, at that hour, and do not take it amiss if your visitor wears a mask. Well, this is indeed a mystery, holmes. What do you imagine that it means? I have no data yet. It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Insensibly, one begins to twist facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts. But the note itself. What do you deduce from it? The man who wrote it was presumably well-to-do.
Speaker 1Such paper could not be bought for under half a crown a packet. It is peculiarly strong and stiff. Peculiar, that is the very word. It is not English paper at all. Hold it up to the light. I see a large E with a small G a P and a large G with a small T woven into the texture of the paper.
Speaker 1What do you make of that? The name of the maker, perhaps? Or his monogram, rather? "'the name of the maker, perhaps, or his monogram, rather' "'Very good, watson, very good. "'the G with a small T stands for Gesellschaft, "'which is the German for company. "'it is a customary contraction, like our own C-O. "'p, of course, is for papier. "'now for the E-G. "'let us glance at our continental gazetteer'. "'i took down a heavy brown volume from my shelves EEG. Let us glance at our continental gazetteer. I took down a heavy brown volume from my shelves Eglo, eglonitz. Ah, here we are.
Speaker 1Egria, it is a German-speaking country in Bohemia, known for its numerous glass factories and paper mills. Ha, ha. Now, what do you make of that, my boy? The paper was made in Bohemia, precisely, and the man who wrote this note is a German. Do you note the peculiar construction of the sentence? This account of you we have from all quarters received. A Frenchman or Russian could not have written that it is the German who is so uncourteous to his verbs. It only remains, therefore, to discover what is wanted by this German who writes upon bohemian paper and prefers wearing a mask to showing his face. And here he comes, if I am not mistaken, to resolve all of our doubts.
Speaker 1As I spoke, there was a sharp sound of horses' hooves and grating wheels against the curb. There was a sharp sound of horses' hooves and grating wheels against the curb, followed by a sharp pull at the bell. I glanced out the window A pair by the sound, watson. Yes, a nice little brogham and a pair of beautiful horses. A hundred and fifty guineas apiece those. There's money in this case, watson.
Speaker 1If there's nothing else, I think that I had better go, holmes, not a bit. Doctor. Stay where you are. I am lost without my Boswell, and this promises to be interesting. It would be a pity to miss it. And besides, I may well need your assistance. But your client Holmes, he seems so secretive. Never mind him. As I say, I may need your help and so may he. Here he comes now. Sit down on the armchair, doctor, and give us your best attention' "'A slow and heavy step which had been heard upon the stairs and in the passage, paused immediately outside the door.
Speaker 1Then there was a loud and authoritative tap "'Come in' coat, while the deep blue cloak which was thrown over his shoulders, was lined with flame-coloured silk and secured at the neck with a brooch which consisted of a single flaming burl. Boots which extended halfway up his calves and which were trimmed at the tops with rich brown fur completed the impression of barbaric opulence which was suggested by his whole appearance. He carried a broad-brimmed hat in his hand, while he wore across the upper part of his face, extending down past his cheekbones, a black visard mask which he had apparently adjusted that very moment, for his hand was still raised to it. As he entered. From the lower part of his face, he appeared to be a man of strong character, with a thick hanging lip and a long, straight chin. Suggestive of resolution pushed to the length of obstinacy. You had my note, mr Holmes. Pray, take a seat.
Speaker 1This is my friend and colleague, dr Watson, who is occasionally good enough to help me in my cases. Whom have I the honour to address? You may address me as the Count von Kram, a bohemian nobleman. I understand that this gentleman, your friend, is a man of honour and discretion whom I may trust with a matter of the most extreme importance. If not, I should much prefer to communicate with you alone. Watson rose to go, but I caught him by the wrist and pushed him back into his chair. It is both or none. You may say before this gentleman. Anything you may say to me, then I must begin by binding you both to absolute secrecy for two years. At the end of that time, the matter will be of no importance. At present, it is not too much to say that it is of such weight that it may have an influence upon European history. I promise, and I of course, you will excuse this mask.
Speaker 1The august person who employs me wishes his agent to be unknown to you, and I must confess at once that the title by which I have just called myself is not exactly my own. I was aware of it. The circumstances are of great delicacy and every precaution has to be taken to quench what might grow into an immense scandal and seriously compromise one of the reigning families of Europe. To speak plainly, the matter implicates the great House of Ormstein, hereditary kings of Bohemia. I was also aware of that. If your Majesty would condescend to state your case, I should be better able to advise you.
Speaker 1The man sprang from his chair and paced up and down the room in uncontrollable agitation. Then, with a gesture of desperation, he tore the mask from his face and hurled it upon the ground. You are right, I am the king. Why should I try to conceal it? Why, indeed, your Majesty had not spoken before? I was aware that I was addressing Wilhelm Gossfried Sigismund von Ormstein, grand Duke of Castle Felstein and Hereditary King of Bohemia. You can understand that I am not accustomed to doing such business in my own person. Yet the matter was so delicate that I could not conf to doing such business in my own person. Yet the matter was so delicate that I could not confide to an agent without putting myself in his power. I have come incognito from Prague for the purpose of consulting you. Then pray, consult. The facts are briefly these Some five years ago, during a lengthy visit to Warsaw, I made the acquaintance of the well-known adventuress Irina Adler.
Speaker 1The name is no doubt familiar to you. Kindly look her up in my index, Watson. I believe her biography is sandwiched in between that of a Hebrew rabbi and that of a staff commander who has written a monograph upon the deep-sea fishes. Let me see, born in New Jersey in the year 1858. Contralto, la Scala, prima Donna, imperial Opera of Warsaw. Yes, retired from the operatic stage. Living in London Does occasional concert appearances. Quite so, a very prestigious musical career, holmes, yes, indeed, watson.
Speaker 1So your Majesty, as I understand, you became entangled with this young lady, wrote her some compromising letters and now you are desirous of getting those letters back. Precisely so. But how could you know? It is my occupation to know. Now tell me, your Majesty, was there a secret marriage? None, no legal papers or certificates? None. Then I fail to follow your Majesty. If this young lady were to produce your papers for blackmailing or other purposes, how was she to prove their authenticity? There is my writing Forgery, my private notepaper Stolen, my own seal Imitated, my photograph Bought.
Speaker 1We were both in that photograph. Oh dear, that is very bad. Your Majesty has indeed committed an indiscretion. I was mad, insane. You have compromised yourself seriously. I was only crown prince then. I was young, I am but thirty. Now it must be recovered. We have tried and failed. Your Majesty must pay, it must be bought. She will not sell Stolen. Then Five attempts have been made. Twice burglars in my pay ransacked her house Once we diverted her luggage when she travelled. Twice she has been waylaid. There has been no result. No sign of it, absolutely none. It is quite a little problem, your majesty, but a very serious one to me. Yes, yes, of course, your majesty, very serious indeed.
Speaker 1Tell me, what does she plan to do with the photograph? To ruin me? But how? Your majesty? I am about to be married, so I have heard To Clotilde Lothman von Saxman-Innegan, second daughter of the king of Scandinavia. You may know the strict principles of her family. She herself is the very soul of delicacy. A shadow of a doubt as to my conduct would bring the matter to an end, and Irina Adler Threatened to send them the photograph, and she will do it. I know that she will do it. You do not know her, but she has a soul of steel. She has the face of the most beautiful woman and the mind of the most resolute of men. Rather than I should marry another woman, there are no lengths to which she would not go, none, you are sure. She has not sent it yet. I am sure, and why? Because she has said that she will send it on the day when the betrothal was publicly proclaimed. That will be next Monday. Ah, then we have three days yet. That is very fortunate, as I have one or two matters of importance to look into just now.
Speaker 1Your Majesty will of course stay in London for the present. Certainly, you will find me at the Langham Hotel under the name of Count von Kram. Then I shall drop you a line to let you know how we progress. Pray, do so. I shall be all anxiety Then. As to money, you have carte blanche, absolutely, I tell you. I would give one of the provinces of my kingdom to have that photograph'.
Speaker 1"'and for present expenses'. The king took a heavy chamois leather bag from under his cloak and laid it upon the table. "'there are three hundred pounds in gold and seven hundred in notes'. I scribbled out a receipt on a page of my notebook and handed it to the king' "'And your Majesty Mademoiselle's address'. "'it is Bryony Lodge, serpentine Avenue, st John's Wood'. "'one other question Was the photograph a cabinet roughly four by six in dimension'? "'yes, it was'. "'then good night, your Majesty, and I trust that we shall have some good news for you soon'. "'this may prove to be a very interesting case indeed, holmes. Oh, but for now I must hurry home, for I am running terribly late. Good night Holmes, good night Watson. If you will be good enough to call tomorrow afternoon at three o'clock, I should like to chat this little matter over with you. Ah yes, very good, holmes, I shall see you then.
Speaker 1It was close upon four the next day before I opened the door of my apartment and found Watson sitting by the fire smoking a cigar. I was dressed as a drunken horse-groom, ill-kempt and side-whiskered, with an inflamed face and disreputable clothes. Watson was accustomed to my powers in the use of disguises, but he still had to look three times before he was certain that it was indeed me of disguises, but he still had to look three times before he was certain that it was indeed me. With a nod, I vanished into my bedroom, whence I emerged in five minutes, tweed-suited and respectable as of old Ha ha ha indeed, oh, watson. What is it, holmes? It is quite too funny. I'm sure you could never guess how I employed my morning or what I ended up doing'. "'i can't imagine, holmes. "'i suppose that you have been watching the habits, "'and perhaps the house of Miss Irina Adler'. "'quite so, watson, quite so, "'but the sequel was rather unusual. "'i left the house a little after eight o'clock this morning, "'in the character of a groom out of work. There is a wonderful sympathy and freemasonry among horsey men. Be one of them, and you will know all that there is to know.
Speaker 1I soon found Briony Lodge. It is a bijou villa with a garden at the back but built out in front, right up to the road. Two stories Chub locked to the door, large sitting room on the right side, well furnished with long windows almost to the floor, with those preposterous English window-fasteners which a child could open. Behind there was nothing remarkable save that the passage-window could be reached from the top of the coach-house. I walked round it and examined it closely from every point of view, but without noting anything of interest. I then lounged down the street and found, as I expected, that there was a muse in a lane which runs down by one of the walls of the garden. I lent the Ostlers a hand in rubbing down their horses and received in exchange two pence, a glass of half-and-half and two fills of shag tobacco and as much information as I could desire about Miss Irina Adler, to say nothing of half a dozen other people in the neighborhood in whom I was not the least interested but whose biographies I was compelled to listen to.
Speaker 1And what of Irina Adler Holmes? Oh, my dear Watson, she has turned all the men's heads down in that part. She is the daintiest thing under a bonnet on this planet. So says a serpentine muse to a man. She lives quietly, sings at concerts, drives out at five every day and returns at seven sharp for dinner. Seldom goes out at other times except when she sings. Only has one male visitor, but sees a good deal of him. He is dark, handsome and dashing, never calls less than once a day and often twice. He is a Mr Godfrey Norton of the Inner Temple. See the advantages of a cabman as a confidant. They had driven him home a dozen times from Serpentine Mews and all knew him well.
Speaker 1When I had listened to all they had to tell, I began to walk up and down near Briony Lodge once more and to think over my plan of campaign. This Godfrey Norton was evidently an important factor in the matter. He was a lawyer. That sounded ominous. What was the relation between them and what was the object of his repeated visits? Was she his client, his friend or his mistress? If the former, she had probably transferred the photograph into his keeping. If the former, she had probably transferred the photograph into his keeping. If the latter, it was less likely. On the issue of this question depended whether I should continue my work at Briony Lodge, or turn my attention to the gentleman's chamber in the temple. It was a delicate point and it widened the field of my inquiry. I fear that I bore you with these details, but I have to let you see my little difficulties if you are to understand the situation. Watson, yes, yes, of course, holmes, I am following you very closely.
Speaker 1I was still balancing the matter in my mind when a handsome cab drove up to Briony Lodge and a gentleman sprang out. He was a remarkably handsome man, dark, aquiline and moustached, evidently the man of whom I had heard, godfrey Norton. He appeared to be in a great hurry, shouted to the cabman to wait and brushed past the maid who opened the door with an air of a man who was thoroughly at home. He was in the house about half an hour. I could catch glimpses of him in the windows of the sitting room, pacing up and down, talking excitedly and waving his arms. Of her I could see nothing. Presently he emerged looking even more flurried than before. As he stepped up to the cab, he pulled out a gold watch from his pocket and looked at it earnestly and then shouted to the cab driver Drive like the devil, first to Grass and Hankies and Reason Street and then to the Church of St Monica and Edgewood Road Half a guinea if you do it in twenty minutes.
Speaker 1Away they went, and I was just wondering whether I should not do well to follow them when up the lane came a neat little Landau, the coachman, with his coat only half-buttoned and his tie under his ear, while all the tags of his harnesses were sticking out of their buckles. It hadn't pulled up before Irina Adler shot out of the hall door and into it. I only caught a glimpse of her at the moment, but she was a lovely woman with a face that a man might die for, a face a man might die for. Really, holmes, an observation, watson, a detail, nothing more. Anyway, she shouted to her coachman the Church of St Monica, john, and half a sovereign if you reach it in twenty minutes. This was quite too good to lose, watson. I was just balancing whether I should run for it or whether I should perch behind her landau when a cab came through the street. The driver looked twice at such a shabby fare, but I jumped in before he could object as I shouted the Church of St Monica and half a sovereign if you can reach it in twenty minutes. It was twenty-five minutes to twelve and of course it was clear enough what was in the wind. My cabbie drove fast I don't think I've ever driven faster in a cab but the others were there before us. The cab and the Landau with their steaming horses were in front of the door.
Speaker 1When I arrived, I paid the man and hurried into the church. There was not a soul there, save the two whom I had followed and a supplies curgiman who seemed to be expostulating with them. They were all three standing in a knot in front of the altar. I lounged up the side aisle like any other idler who has dropped into a church. Suddenly, to my surprise, the three at the altar faced round to me and Godfrey Norton came running as hard as he could towards me. You there? Yes you, thank God, you're here, you'll do. Come, come. I answered, of course in character. What's that sir? What's that governor? Come, man, come, come to the altar. Only three minutes or it won't be legal.
Speaker 1I was half dragged up to the altar and before I knew where I was, I found myself mumbling responses which were whispered in my ear and vouching for things of which I knew nothing, and generally assisting in the secure tying up of Adler and Godfrey Norton. It was all done in an instant and there was the gentleman thanking me on the one side and the lady on the other, while the clergyman beamed on in front of me. It was the most preposterous position in which I have ever found myself in my life, and it was the thought of it that started me laughing just now. It seems that there had been some informality about their license, that the clergyman absolutely refused to marry them without a witness of some sort, and that my lucky appearance saved the bridegroom from having to sally out into the streets in search of a best man. The bride gave me a sovereign and I intend to wear it upon my watch chain in memory of the occasion. Sovereign, and I intend to wear it upon my watch-chain in memory of the occasion.
Speaker 1What a very unexpected turn of affairs. At what then Holmes? Well, I found my plans very seriously menaced. It looked as if the pair might make an immediate departure and so necessitate very prompt and energetic measures upon my part. At the church door, however, they separated, he driving back to the temple and she to her own home. I shall drive out in the park at five, as usual, godfrey. Very good, my darling, you have made me the happiest man in the world.
Speaker 1I heard no more. They drove away in different directions and I went off to make my own arrangements. And what exactly are your arrangements, holmes? Some cold beef and a glass of beer'. "'i rang the bell to call Mrs Hudson, the landlady. "'i've been too busy to think of food, watson. "'and I'm likely to be busier this evening. "'by the way, doctor, I shall want your cooperation if you're willing' "'I shall be delighted'. "'you don't mind breaking the law'? "'not in the least' "' Nor running a chance of arrest. Not in a good cause. No, oh, the cause is excellent. Then I am your man, holmes. Ha, I was sure that I might rely on you, watson. But what is it exactly you wish, holmes? I will make that clear to you. Please forgive me. I must discuss it while I eat, for I have not much time.
Speaker 1It is nearly five now. In two hours we must be on the scene of action. Miss Irina, or Madam Irina rather, returns from her drive. At seven we must be at Briony Lodge to meet her. And what then, holmes? You must leave that to me. I have already arranged what is to occur. There is only one point on which I must insist. You must not interfere, come what may. Do you understand? I am to be neutral, to do nothing whatever. There will probably be some small unpleasantness. Do not join in it. It will end in my being conveyed into the house.
Speaker 1Four or five minutes afterwards, the sitting-room window will open. You are to station yourself close to that open window. Yes, all right, holmes, you are to watch for me, for I will be visible to you. Very good, yes. And when I raise my hand, you will throw into the room what I give you to throw and will at the same time raise the cry of fire. You quite follow me Entirely, holmes. It's nothing very formidable.
Speaker 1I took a long, cigar-shaped roll from my pocket. It is an ordinary plumber's smoke rocket fitted with a cap at either end to make itself lighting. Ah, yes, they release smoke into pipes in order to locate cracks and holes. Precisely, watson, your task is confined to throwing in the plumber's rocket and raising the alarm for fire. When you raise your cry of fire, it will be taken up by quite a number of people. You may then walk to the end of the street and I will rejoin you in ten minutes. This is all very clear. Yes, I am to remain neutral, to get near the window to watch for you and, at the signal, throw in the smoke bomb, then to raise a cry of fire and to wait for you at the corner of the street. That is excellent, watson. I think perhaps it is almost time that I prepare for the new role I have to play.
Speaker 1I disappeared into my bedroom and returned in a few minutes in the character of an amiable and simple-minded, non-conformist clergyman. I wore a broad black hat, baggy trousers, white tie, a sympathetic smile and general look of peering and benevolent curiosity. It was a quarter past six when we left Baker Street and still it was ten minutes to the hour. When we found ourselves in Serpentine Avenue, it was already dusk and the lamps were just being lighted. As we paced up and down in front of Briony Lodge waiting for the arrival of its occupant, the locality of the house was less private than it would normally have been due to my arrangements. The small, normally quiet street was quite animated. There was a group of shabbily dressed men smoking and laughing, a scissor grinder with his wheel, two guardsmen who were flirting with a young lady and several well-dressed young men who were lounging up and down with cigars in their mouths.
Speaker 1Watson and I continued our vigil awaiting the arrival of Irina Norton. You see, watson, this marriage rather simplifies matters. The photograph becomes a double-edged weapon. Now the chances are that she would be as versed to its being seen by Mr Godfrey Norton as her client is to it coming to the eyes of his princess. Now the question is where are we to find the photograph, holmes? Where, indeed, it is most unlikely that she carries it about with her. It is cabinet-sized, too large for easy concealment about a woman's dress.
Speaker 1"'she knows that the king is capable of having a waylaid and searched. "'two attempts of this sort have already been made. "'we may take it, then, that she does not carry it about with her' "'But where then, would she hide it' "'Her banker, her lawyer? There is that double possibility' "'But I am inclined to think neither'. "'she will have to be secretive, "'and she will probably like to do her own secreting. "'why should she hand it over to anyone else? "'she could trust her own guardianship, "'but she could not tell what indirect or political influence "'might be brought to bear upon a businessman. "'besides, remember that she has resolved to use it within a few days. "'it must be where she can lay her hands upon it. "'it must be in her own house.
Speaker 1But, holmes, her house has been burgled twice For sure, watson. They did not know how to look. But how will you look? I will not look. Well, what then, holmes? She will show me. But that's ridiculous, holmes, she will refuse. Ah, my dear boy, she will not be able to refuse. But I hear the rumble of wheels. It is her carriage. Now, carry out my orders to the letter, watson.
Speaker 1As I spoke, the gleam of the side lights of a carriage came round the curve of the avenue. It was a smart little landau which rattled up to the door of Bryony Lodge. As it pulled up, one of the loafing men at the corner dashed forward to open the door in the hope of owning a copper, but was elbowed away by another loafer who had rushed up with the same intention. A fierce quarrel broke out, which was increased by the two guardsmen who took sides with one of the loungers and by the scissor-grinder who was equally hot upon the other side. A blow was struck and in an instant the lady who had stepped from her carriage was the centre of a little knot of flushed and struggling men who struck savagely at each other with their fists and sticks. Remember my instructions, watson. You may rely upon me. Holmes, I dashed forward into the crowd to protect the lady and just as I reached her, I gave a cry and dropped to the ground with blood running freely down my face. At my fall, the guardsmen took to their heels in one direction and the loungers in the other, while a number of the better-dressed people, who had watched the scuffle without taking part in it, crowded in to help the lady and to attend to me.
Speaker 1An injured clergyman, irina Adler, or should I say Irina Norton, had hurried up the steps, but she stood at the top with her superb figure, outlined against the lights of the hall, looking back into the street. Is the poor gentleman hurt? He looks dead to me. Oh no, there's life in him. He's a brave fellow. They would have had the lady's purse and watch if it hadn't been for him. They were a gang, a rough one too. And he, oh, oh, oh, he's breathing now. Well, he can't lie in a street. May we bring him in, ma'am, surely. Bring him into the sitting room. There's a comfortable sofa this way. They can't lie in a street. May we bring him in, ma'am, surely. Bring him into the sitting room. There's a comfortable sofa. This way, please. So far, everything was going as planned. I or should I say the injured clergyman had gotten Irina Adler's attention.
Speaker 1All of my carefully made plans were now bearing fruit and slowly and solemnly, I was borne into Bryiony Lodge and laid out in the principal room, while Watson still observed the proceedings from his post by the window. I do not know whether I was seized with a compunction at that moment for the part I was playing, but I know that I never felt more heartily ashamed of myself in my life than when I saw the beautiful creature against whom I was compromising up close, or the grace and kindness with which she waited upon me, whom she believed to be an injured man. I hardened my heart. After all, we were not injuring her, we were but preventing her from injuring another. I sat up on the couch and I motioned like a man who was in need of air. A maid rushed across and threw open the window. At the same time, I raised my hand and at the signal, watson tossed in the plumber's rocket and began to raise the alarm of fire. And began to raise the alarm of fire. Fire, I say fire. The word was no sooner out of Watson's mouth than the whole crowd of spectators. Well-dressed and ill gentlemen, ostlers and servant maids joined in a general shriek of fire, as was my plan. Thick clouds of smoke curled through the room and out the open window. A moment later I cried False alarm in which, as prearranged, the crowd joined wholeheartedly. This was Watson's cue to slip through the shouting crowd and make his way to the corner of the street where, in ten minutes, I joined him and we hurried away from the scene of the uproar. We walked swiftly and in silence for some few minutes until we had turned down one of the quietroar. We walked swiftly and in silence for some few minutes until we had turned down one of the quiet streets which leads towards Edgeware Road.
Speaker 1You did it very nicely, doctor. Nothing could have been better. It was perfect. Ah, very good, holmes, very good, you have the photograph then. No, not yet, but I know where it is. And how did you find out, holmes? She showed me, watson, as I told you she would. I'm afraid I'm still in the dark, holmes, I do not wish to make it a mystery. The matter was perfectly simple. You, of course, saw that everyone in the street was an accomplice. They were all engaged for the evening. Yes, of course I guess that much.
Speaker 1Then, when the row broke out, I had a little moist red paint on the palm of my hand. I rushed forward, fell down, clapped my hand to my face and became a piteous spectacle. It is an old trick that I could also fathom. Then they carried me in she was bound to have me in, what else could she do? And into a sitting room which was the very room which I suspected it lay between that and her bedroom, and I was determined to see which, they laid me out on a couch. I motioned for air and they were compelled to open the window.
Speaker 1And you had your chance. And how did that help you, holmes? It was of the utmost importance. When someone thinks their house is on fire, their instinct is at once to rush to the thing that they value most. It is a perfectly overpowering impulse and I have more than once taken advantage of it. In the case of the Darlington substitution scandal. It was of use to me, and also in that business at Arnsworth Castle. Now, for instance, a married woman may run for her baby if she thinks her house is on fire. Another may reach for her jewel box.
Speaker 1Now it was clear to me that our lady of to-day had nothing in the house more precious to her than what we are in quest of. She would rush to secure it. The alarm of fire was admirably done. The smoke and shouting were enough to shake nerves of steel. She responded beautifully. The photograph is in a recess behind a sliding panel just above the right bell pole. She was there an instant and I caught a glimpse of it as she half drew it out. When I cried out that it was a false alarm, she replaced it, glanced at the plumber's rocket and then rushed from the room. I have not seen her since.
Speaker 1I rose and, making my excuses, escaped from the house. I hesitated whether to attempt to secure the photograph at once, but the coachman had come in and he was watching me narrowly. It seemed safer to wait. Over-precipitation on my part could easily ruin all. And what do you propose we do now? Well, watson, our quest is practically finished. I shall call with the king tomorrow and with you, if you care to come with us. We will be shown into the sitting-room to wait for the lady, but it is probable that when she comes she may find neither us nor the photograph. It might be a satisfaction to His Majesty to regain the photograph with his own hands. And when will you call Holmes? At eight in the morning she will not be up, so that we shall have a clear field. Besides, we must be prompt, for this marriage may mean a complete change in her life and habits. I must wire to the King without delay.
Speaker 1We had reached Baker Street and had stopped at the door. I was searching my pockets for the key when someone passed and we heard a voice Good night, mr Sherlock Holmes. There were several people on the pavement at the time, but the greeting appeared to come from a slim youth in an ulster who had hurried by Watson. I've heard that voice before Now. I wonder who the deuce that could have been. Watson slept at Baker Street that night, and we were engaged upon our toast and coffee in the morning when the King of Bohemia rushed into the room. You have really got the photograph, mr Holmes.
Speaker 1The King grasped me by either shoulder and looked eagerly into my eyes. Not quite, your Majesty, not quite yet, but you have hopes. Yes, your Majesty, the situation looks very hopeful indeed. Then come, I am all impatience to be gone. Then we must have a cab. There is no need. My Brogham is waiting.
Speaker 1We descended and started off at once for Briony Lodge In the carriage. I thought I should bring the King up to date on matters. Your Majesty, irina Adler is married, married, that's impossible. When she was married yesterday, your Majesty, but to whom? To an English lawyer named Norton. But she could not love him. I am in the hopes that she does love him. And why in such hopes? Because it would spare your Majesty all fear of future annoyance. If the lady loves her husband, then she does not love your majesty. If she does not love your majesty, there is no reason why she should interfere with your majesty's plan for marriage. It is true, and yet, well, I wish she had been of my own station. What a queen she would have made.
Speaker 1The king relapsed into a moody silence which was not broken until we drew up in Serpentine Avenue. The door of Briony Lodge was open and an elderly woman stood upon the steps. She watched us with a sardonic eye as we stepped from the carriage. Mr Sherlock Holmes, I believe I am. Mr Holmes. Yes, indeed, my mistress told me that you were likely to call. She left this morning with her husband by the 5.15 train from Charing Cross for the Continent. What Is this true? I staggered back, white, with chagrin and surprise. Do you mean that she has left England Never to return? And the photograph mean that she has left England Never to return? And the photograph? All is lost. Mr Holmes, we shall see. Your Majesty Come along, watson.
Speaker 1We pushed past the servant and rushed into the drawing-room, followed by the King. The furniture was scattered about in every direction, with dismantled shelves and open drawers, as if the Lady had hurriedly ransacked them before her flight. "'i rushed at the bell-pull, tore back a small sliding shutter "'and, plunging in my hand, pulled out a photograph and a letter. "'the photograph was of Irina Adler, herself in evening dress "'and the letter was superscribed to me. "'sherlock Holmes, esquire to be left till called for "'I tore it open and we all three read it together. It was dated at midnight of the preceding night and ran as follows my dear Sherlock Holmes, you really did it very well. You took me in completely.
Speaker 1Until after the alarm of fire, I had not a suspicion, but then, when I found how I had betrayed myself, I began to think. I had been warned against you months ago. I had been told that if the king employed an agent? It would certainly be you, and your address had been given to me. Yet with all this, you made me reveal what you wanted to know. Even after I became suspicious, I found it hard to think evil of such a dear, kind old clergyman. But you know, I have been trained as an actress myself.
Speaker 1Male costume is nothing new to me. I often take advantage of the freedom which it gives. I sent John the coachman to watch you. I ran upstairs, got into my walking clothes, as I call them, and came down just as you departed. Well, I followed you to your door and so made sure that I really was an object of interest to the celebrated Mr Sherlock Holmes. And then I, rather imprudently, wished you good night and started off for the temple to see my husband. Both Godfrey and I thought the best resource was flight when pursued by so formidable an antagonist. So you will find the nest empty when you call tomorrow.
Speaker 1As to the photograph, your client may rest in peace. I love and am loved by a better man than he. The king may do what he will without hindrance from one who he has cruelly wronged. I keep the photograph only to safeguard myself and to preserve a weapon which will always secure me from any steps which he might take in the future. I leave another photograph which he might care to possess, and I remain dear Mr Sherlock Holmes, very truly yours, dear Mr Sherlock Holmes, very truly yours.
Speaker 1Irina Norton N Adler. What a woman, oh, what a woman. Did I not tell you how quick and resolute she was? Would she not have made an admirable queen? Is it not a pity that she was not on my level? From what I have seen of the lady, she seems indeed to be on a very different level to your Majesty. I am sorry that I have not been able to bring your majesty's business to a more successful conclusion. On the contrary, my dear sir, nothing could be more successful. I know that her word is inviolate.
Speaker 1The photograph is now as safe as if it were in the fire. I am very glad to hear your majesty say so. I am immensely indebted to you. Pray, tell me in what way I can reward you this ring. He slipped an emerald snake ring from his finger and held it out upon the palm of his hand.
Speaker 1Your majesty has something which I should value even more highly. You have but to name it this photograph. The king stared at me in amazement. Irina's photograph, certainly, if you wish it. I thank your majesty. There is no more to be done in the matter. I have the honor to wish you a very good morning. I bowed and turning away without observing the hand which the king had stretched out to me. Watson and I set off for Baker Street, and that was how a great scandal threatened to affect the kingdom of Bohemia and how my plans were beaten by a woman's wit. I often used to make merry over the cleverness of women, but I have not done it since my encounter with Irina Adler. To me, she will always hold the title of the Woman. Sherlock Holmes Alone, produced by Agnes McVie, recorded by Lester P, adapted and performed by JP Winslow, based on the original writings of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. ©. Transcript Emily Beynon. Thank you.