Teacher-Mum life with Melita

What happens when a passionate primary teacher returns to the classroom after time off to raise her kids? Melita, a dedicated educator with 15 years' experience, shares how motherhood gave her a fresh, empathetic lens on teaching. 

She opens up about how parenting deepened her understanding of students and their families—how knowing what happens at home can shape more compassionate teaching. "I have a new perspective from the family side," she says, seeing students as whole individuals, not just learners. 

Melita also reflects on why she loves the variety in primary teaching, from Maths to PE to Art, and how different strengths shine through: "They're all just so unique, and they are a marvel." 

We also talk about challenges—new curriculum changes, structured literacy, and the rising demands on teachers. For mums thinking of returning to the classroom, Melita suggests trying relief teaching and finding "a kura where you feel valued." Her top advice? "Be kind to yourself. You're juggling a lot." 

Keen to hear how one teacher balances teaching and being a mum? Tune in and join fellow educators navigating the beautiful chaos of teaching and life. 

Hosted by Debbie Ross
Find us on Instagram & Facebook: @nurturingeducators

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or to chat, please email: nurturingeducators@gmail.com or visit  www.nurturingeducators.co.nz

Thanks for listening! 

Transcript

Introduction to Melita's Teaching Journey

Debbie 0:14

Music . Welcome to Nuturing Educators , the podcast that shares inspiring and insightful conversations with passionate teachers dedicated to education and well-being . I'm your host , debbie Ross , and each episode we will explore the personal stories , challenges and successes of educators from all walks of life . You'll hear practical tips and strategies to help them thrive both in the classroom and beyond . To help them thrive both in the classroom and beyond . Welcome to today's episode . I'm chatting with my good friend , melita . We've known each other since our uni days and shared plenty of adventures along the way as part of our awesome girls crew . Melita's not only a fantastic friend , but a dedicated primary school teacher who took time off to be a mum and is now back in the classroom . We're going to dive into the joys and challenges of teaching in primary and what it's like stepping back into the classroom after a break . Let's get started . Welcome , Melita .

Melita 1:19

Hi , how are you ?

Debbie 1:20

Good . Hey , before we get started , would you like to tell us a little bit about yourself ?

Melita 1:26

Well , I'm Melita and I've been teaching since 2004 . I now have a wee family . I have a boy , Malakai , and a little girl , Mila , and my husband , Chris , who is a physio .

Melita 1:40

Yeah , we're a very adventurous family . We're always in the outdoors , so enjoying life

Debbie 1:47

And, um, what inspired you to become a primary school teacher ?

Melita 1:51

I think initially I just knew I always had a really good rapport with children and I was also very sporty , so I kind of went down the lines of thinking I'll be a PE teacher . But then I thought , well , actually I don't want to just be in one curriculum area because I enjoyed like art and music and other different things , and so I kind of channeled it and thought , well , actually primary school teaching would be a great vocation because this kind of gives me variety during the day . And yeah , I thought that would be . You know , have holidays with the children .

Debbie 2:28

Yeah , I love that . So what would be ? You did say holidays , but what would be some other rewarding things about the job ?

Melita 2:36

I think the most rewarding is seeing the strides in the kids' education , and I've worked a lot in the junior school area and I've seen , you know , just from the beginning of the year to the end of the year , like there's a massive progress . So I think that's that's really rewarding and to feel like you've been a part of that .

Melita 2:58

It's just amazing and you've made a difference , you know , in that child's life and I love the thought of with especially young children and all children that you've been a part of their five-year-old self or their six-year-old self you know .

Debbie 3:11

Yeah that's really cute .

Debbie 3:12

Yeah , can you share a standout moment where you felt like you

Rewarding Aspects of Primary Teaching

Debbie 3:17

truly made a difference in some students life ?

Melita 3:21

Yeah , I mean , I do remember there was a boy in my class who had quite major behavioural issues and I felt like , as a teacher , I could be a and like , have my own viewpoint and not feel like I've got these preconceived ideas and he thinks that I'm going to treat him in a certain way . So , yeah , I think that I did have a positive influence in his life and , you know , he did feel like cared for under my teaching .

Debbie 4:02

That's good . How has becoming a parent changed the way you approach teaching ?

Melita 4:10

I think it's helped me have an even more holistic approach to teaching . So I have a new perspective from the family side and you kind of have a bit more empathy . I mean , I always had empathy , but even probably more empathy for children to realise there's just a range of things that happen in their day , and not even just their day . Even if you just put it down to just their morning , like what you know , they could have had a tough morning . So , yeah , just more understanding of their life , I guess , because I have children of my own and I know what it can be like .

Melita 4:47

Yeah , so I think that kind of helps in your teaching to just have more rounded approach instead of just seeing like a kid as your client and you're teaching him maths and reading and things like that . Yeah more rounded .

Debbie 5:02

I like that , yeah , so what's the favourite part of your school day ?

Melita 5:08

I just love that as a primary teacher , you have a variety throughout the day , which I mentioned earlier , instead of say , if I was in secondary , you're usually just concentrated in one area , like a history teacher , and that , I don't know know to me could feel a bit monotonous . But I just love that . You just have variety during the day and things switch up and change all the time and I love getting outside

Parenting's Impact on Teaching Approach

Melita 5:34

and doing sport with the kids and I love doing art with kids . I love seeing their creativity . I think there's nothing better than kids Art like you could never recreate what they create yeah .

Debbie 5:45

Do you find that you get a more holistic approach , I guess , to seeing students and seeing their strengths , because you know someone's good at math but then not so good at PE , but someone else is good at PE ? Is that something that you've liked from primary school teaching , that you get to teach the same kids in a variety of subjects and so , yeah , different strengths come out at different

Melita 6:10

Different strengths come out and then those strengths can help other students . So you're not just a teacher , you're a learner , but those students become almost teachers to other students . So , for example , if someone's really mathematically minded and just gifted in that area and they can problem solve really well , then , say , perhaps in group work they can help some of those who are finding it a bit more difficult , or have conversations with one another to understand strategies and how they come up to answers and things like that . So , yes , it's awesome seeing the giftings and children and they're all just so unique and I remember at one school they had on a wall . You know that children are a marvel and I just thought that was really neat because they are all just so different and they are a marvel . It's good to see them as unique and they've all got different gifts and abilities .

Debbie 7:08

o do you build strong connections with your students and their families ?

Melita 7:13

That's a good question . Well , I'm naturally a really relational sort of person and enjoying getting to know people . So I think it's important to be personable and greet parents and listen to what they want to share about their child , especially at the beginning of the year , but even throughout the year , as education should be home in school and you want to partner with them on that , yeah so , and they know their child really well , which can help with your perspective of them and how to teach them and grow them and , I think , with the students again , be relational . Like you know , I like to be real with my students , let them know a little bit about me , but , you know , be firm but fair .

Melita 7:58

But sometimes I like to show a bit of character , you know , and hold the duster in my hand and I'll sing something or you know , just pretend to sing something and they have a crack up you know they see a lighter side of me instead of just that person or authority . Building relationship is key and I learned from a school it's about relationship , relationship , relationship . That comes first before any learning .

Melita 8:23

Yes , I think that's really important

Debbie 8:26

Mm , very good . So teaching in New Zealand . What do you reckon is something unique about teaching here that might be different from overseas ?

Melita 8:38

Well , I haven't had this experience myself , but when I did live closer to the beach , there were schools over the coastline and they used to take the kids surfing oh wow , and I thought that was awesome .

Melita 8:52

I was like what a cool extracurricular , how fun um activity for the children to do , which is like obviously a passion area for them that they get to do outside of all the other curriculum areas that they do , and it's yeah , I think that's just amazing and I don't think you get that everywhere , certain areas , but I thought that was unique .

Debbie 9:15

Yeah , that's cool , I like that . So what was it like stepping away from teaching to be a mum ?

Melita 9:20

Well , I had been probably teaching about 15 years before I stepped away and I was

Building Relationships in Education

Melita 9:26

ready for that break and yeah , so I loved it .

Melita 9:32

I was ready for the break break . I thoroughly enjoyed becoming a mum and inputting into my own children and I love inputting into children in general , but just having your own children was just very special to me . So I just I loved it , enjoyed the break . I dabbled still here and there with a bit of relieving , but not too intense . I just wanted to bring up my children .

Debbie 9:53

So kind of enough to keep up the teaching . But still enjoying family .

Melita 9:58

And enough to know what schools are still doing and have a bit of PD in different areas .

Debbie 10:04

Yeah , that's quite a smart way of doing it , yeah , so what do you think were some of the biggest challenges that you have had to face in returning to the classroom after having time away ?

Melita 10:18

Well , I guess you know , as I said , having a break from teaching , it really refreshed me and I felt ready to get . Once it came to time for me to get back into the classroom , I was like ready to get back into it and , yeah , I felt refreshed and revitalized and I was felt energized , where I felt like that energy kind of dissipated towards the end of 15 years , I guess , and I think that's just like a really important thing, to not be squashed . And so I think the biggest challenge for me has been to secure a permanent teaching position . Coming back into teaching , but that could be to do with the region that I live in .

Melita 10:59

I think people just stay in their positions for years and years because , yeah , a great place to be . So you sort of feel like a bit of a hamster in a wheel with all these other fixed termers trying to get a permanent . So that can be difficult . Because you just want to feel secure in a position and valued , yeah , just get back into it . When you're ready , you're ready .

Debbie 11:24

I get that . Has education changed at all since you taught last time and then had a break ?

Melita 11:32

Well , there's the whole New Zealand curriculum that's been implemented . So I think everyone's trying to get their head around that . And schools have adopted the structured literacy approach and even a structured maths approach through maths programs such as Maths no Problem and Oxford Maths , which are trying to foster a deep understanding and fluency in mathematics . So , yeah , a DP that I respect once said to me not to get caught up in the book programs that schools are using . But you know , good pedagogy and curriculum knowledge is key . Yeah , so you know , I've been having professional development with a structured literacy approach and then had practice with it while teaching in the last year and a half and that's been really good just to develop my skills . Yeah , but I thought that was really cool what she said .

Debbie 12:23

Yeah , that's good advice .

Melita 12:24

Yeah because there's so much being implemented at the moment and everyone's different in different schools .

Debbie 12:32

So obviously when we go into something new can often feel a little bit daunting . How did you overcome the hurdle of the unknown or stepping back into teaching after having that time off ?

Melita 12:46

Stepping back into teaching felt like second nature because I had already taught for so many years . But it's always the colleagues around you that lift you up and help you along the way . So if you think you have any questions like , they're there to help . So I think it is a great career because for the most part , people are very encouraging and you know , if you're unsure of something , they're like that's okay , I can help you with that , which I like to do with my colleagues too , like share my ideas or whatever have you .

Returning to Teaching After Motherhood

Melita 13:15

But I think it's important to have a growth mindset and know that you don't know everything , and be a learner and ask questions .

Melita 13:22

And if you're unsure of something , example the new curriculum or how to implement a certain program . Just ask .

Debbie 13:29

Yeah , absolutely .

Melita 13:30

Yeah .

Debbie 13:31

Being a mum now and a teacher . How do you balance that ?

Melita 13:36

It's definitely a balancing act and it's something that you know . I'm still trying to juggle , I guess , but it becomes your new normal to juggle both as you do life with your kids and you love also stepping back into the classroom and working in your chosen career . Logistically , it's easier to teach at the school where your children are . And I still probably don't have the perfect balance- Life as a teacher , mum , wife , doing fitness , having time for myself , but I do try to enjoy all aspects of my life .

Debbie 14:09

Yeah and there's always little things we can do to allow ourselves to have a more balanced lifestyle , isn't there ?

Melita 14:18

Definitely , and that's why I think it is more of a juggling act when you're a mother than when I was single . I mean , you know , I always had things lined up socially and you know , if I wanted to go off surfing , I could go surfing or snowboarding , just take off to the mountain , but it's just different yeah it's just different life , but it becomes your new normal because you just love your family and love getting back into teaching . So you just juggle it .

Melita 14:43

Yeah , somehow

Debbie 14:43

It just happens , yeah .

Melita 14:46

Yeah so kudos to all the mothers out there yeah , because you're doing an amazing job and you need to hear that .

Debbie 14:53

So true ! Just a few more questions, with regards to primary school teachers these days , because obviously I've done quite a few interviews with high school teachers but not so many with primary . What are some of the bigger challenges that you'll face ?

Melita 15:10

Um , I think that teachers are facing a heavy load at the moment . Not only is there the new curriculum and implementing new programs into the classroom , in which you're having to have lots of PD around to become knowledgeable and effective in your own teaching , but there's like extra testing that's come through the government because they're wanting to collect data , and so these have been implemented on top of new programs that have been implemented as well as the curriculum , and there's just a lot going on . It sounds like this year is like almost like they've been the toughest year for teachers At the moment I'm

Debbie 15:51

Do they give you any release time for that ?

Melita 15:54

Yeah , they do . I think they always try and give you some release time to try and get everything done .

Debbie 16:01

But there's never enough , is there yeah ?

Melita 16:04

I mean thankfully , at the moment I'm relieving so I'm not having to deal so hard with all those issues , which is probably a blessing in disguise , but it's also given me some time with my daughter , Mila , before she hits school , so I'm enjoying that exciting yeah , but it sounds like it's pretty a pretty heavy , heavy load

Debbie 16:24

With primary school teaching and relief work do you teach the lessons that the relievers set out or do you do them yourself ?

Melita 16:34

Uh , I often have left something okay , which is great professional practice , to be honest , I think I've always left something for a reliever , just in my own professional practice . That's just how I've been taught , but with ease to um , you know if I was like well , if you don't want to do a mass activity , um , you can just do what you want .

Melita 16:57

But for the most part things are left and usually someone will go through it with you if it's another colleague , a team leader

Challenges in Today's Teaching Environment

Melita 17:06

or the DP might just go through it with you of the day and even the times , because every school is different yeah , sure with timings like intervals and lunch times and things like that . But yeah , I enjoy that because I can just get on with the program if it's left but if it's not , I also have my own material that I will bring just in case and ideas locked up here , because I've had so many years of teaching

Debbie 17:30

Yeah, lots of good little games ?

Melita 17:32

Yeah , lots of cool games like I love to have fun with the kids .

Debbie 17:37

And I bet they love that too . In your role as a reliever , what do you do to manage student behaviour ? You know what you said about having fun but also making sure that the kids are in line and get on with their work as well .

Melita 17:57

Fortunately , I think , because I've had so many years' experience , I'm pretty confident when I go in as a teacher , like I don't see myself as a relief teacher .

Melita 18:08

I just go in and I be myself , but I think I always set up the day with being relational and like building a relationship with them , even if it's just for the day . They might not see you again , or they might see you again somewhere in some other classroom , but I do like to introduce myself . Tell them a little bit about me , tell them some of my hobbies , ask them if they have any questions .

Melita 18:31

And then I've always been very firm but fair with children in my class and I think it's important to have those clear expectations and routines from the beginning , to have those clear expectations and routines from the beginning , because later on you kind of can ease up and show a bit more of your character and have a bit of fun with them that they already have your respect .

Debbie 18:51

Yes , yeah . I think that's a good tip for new teachers , that it's really important to start off with very set guidelines and rules and then they can slack off a little bit once they actually get to know the kids .

Melita 19:06

It's probably helpful if you've spoken to the teacher . I do know your teacher , yeah , but I've always generally um got on really well for and had a good day .

Debbie 19:16

And just maybe one last little question to finish off: what advice would you give to mums returning to teaching ?

Finding Your Teaching Home

Melita 19:27

I would suggest relieve for a while , if you can , just to feel out the different schools , because every school is different and some you'll jive with and some you'll not , and you instinctively will know if you're in a school you would like to work in more permanently . And also , I think it's important to be in a kura where you feel valued and uplifted , because there's nothing worse than being in a place where you feel undervalued that is , you know , quite a red flag to move on to somewhere new where you can grow professionally and be around positive , uplifting people .

Melita 20:04

So get yourself out there , get to know different schools and just find your home .

Debbie 20:09

Find your home .

Melita 20:13

I think a good piece of advice for mums returning to teaching is just to be kind to yourself , because you are juggling many balls . You're going to have good days , you're going to have bad days , um , but you know you'll make those good days memorable . So you just be kind to yourself and let others love on you too

Debbie 20:36

That's great .

Debbie 20:37

Oh well , thank you so much for taking the time today , Melita , to come in and have a chat with us .

Melita 20:43

You're so welcome .

Debbie 20:44

Very entertaining . I've loved hearing a little bit about your life and teaching and mumming . So , yeah , thanks so much .

Melita 20:52

Yes , Thats okay .

Debbie 20:54

Take care . Thank you so much for listening . If you enjoyed today's episode , don't forget to hit the subscribe button , leave a review and share it with your fellow educators . Let's keep these important conversations going . For more information , follow us at nurturing educators on facebook and time . . Until next time .