EP 14: Feminine Freedom Kick-Off - From Burned out to Bold

You're not stuck - you were just given the wrong rules. 

Welcome to the kickoff of my 4-part podcast series Feminine Freedom, where I share the raw, real story behind my wake-up call—from doing everything “right” (and burning out in the process) to redefining success on my own terms.

We’re in a moment where more women are starting businesses, climbing the ladder, and stepping into leadership—but at what cost? Society still expects us to “do it all,” and it’s driving us straight into exhaustion.

This episode explores what happens when we stop grinding and start flowing. I’ll walk you through how I went from achievement-addicted and chronically stressed to reclaiming my health, stepping out of default domestic roles, reprogramming my beliefs around money, and finally… finding a deeper sense of freedom and joy.

Whether you're a high-achiever, a recovering perfectionist, or a woman craving a different way—this series is for you.

We’ll explore:

• Why burnout hits women harder (and why it’s not your fault)
• How I unknowingly brought my hustle home
• The moment I made a 5-figure investment in myself with no job (and why it changed everything)
• Why the old rules of success don’t work—and what to do instead

This is more than a podcast. It’s a permission slip. A new manual for success, designed by women—for women.

Upcoming episodes will dive into:
 → Health (your body isn’t a machine)
 → Home (ditch the domestic default)
 → Wealth (bold self-investment & feminine money)
 → Happiness (joy as a metric of success)

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Connect with Carly Schade HERE

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Transcript

0:00:00 Carly: Foreign. Welcome to Coffee with Carly, your weekly wake up call to a happier, healthier life. I’m your host, Carly Schade, and I’m here to uncover how good life can get. All right, Good morning, everyone. So. So today is a really special episode. It’s a kickoff to a new four part series that has been on my heart for a while and I’m so excited to finally see this come into fruition. But it’s a four part series that I’m calling Feminine Freedom.

0:00:42 Carly: So this one is for the woman who’s tired of doing it all. This is for the one who grinds and hustles and adds but never lets go. This is for the one who looks like she’s thriving on paper, but feels like she’s barely holding on on the inside. This is for the woman who’s tired of pushing and forcing and competing just to get ahead, or has maybe ever thought, if I want something done right, I’ll have to just do it myself.

0:01:11 Carly: So you know what I mean, Right? Like the moment when you’re loading the dishwasher, answering a work email, thinking about what make, what to make for dinner all at the same time, and then you still feel like you’re somehow dropping the ball. This is for you. And if you’re a man listening, don’t exit just yet, okay? We could all learn a thing or two from this series and you might even want to learn how to better support your woman.

0:01:36 Carly: Because the reality is that so many women are burned out, disconnected from their selves, trying to do it all. Okay? According to the American Medical association, it’s actually 55% of women are feeling burned out, which Is compared to 42% of men. Now, both of those numbers are problematic, don’t get me wrong. But we’re focusing on the ladies for today. And so while more and more women are becoming CEOs and launching businesses and breaking glass ceilings, which is amazing.

0:02:07 Carly: The cost, it’s often us, because we’re told that as our careers grow, our ability to stay present at home has to shrink. That we have to choose to be the man and the woman to do it all, to hold it all. So there was an article that BBC wrote interviewing a woman who was recently, like, really focusing on her career, but also being a new mom. And she said that her life, most days she just feels like she’s trying not to fall off of an accelerating treadmill, that her life is just about getting through the week and just trying to stay sane.

0:02:48 Carly: Is that really what we are all doing here? Okay. Is just Staying sane, really, the life that we’re working so hard for. And that is a rhetorical question, because if you’re here, I already know that you want more. And I know you desire change. You’re just maybe looking for the tools to help you do that. And that’s awesome. So also sit here and celebrate yourself for that. But as we pointed out, as women become more successful, our plates only get more full.

0:03:16 Carly: So where, where is the release valve? Like, where do we have room left for this flow, for this creativity, for this pleasure? Or where is this freedom that we thought success would bring? Because burnout is not just a workplace problem. It is a societal issue. It’s a nervous system issue. It’s a whole body, whole life issue. And in case you can’t tell by now, I am all about a holistic approach. So the truth of the matter is, though, we have been as women, chasing success the wrong way, because women were actually never meant to succeed the way that men do.

0:03:58 Carly: And these rules that work for men, they don’t work for us. But this is actually a good thing, you guys, because this means that we get to define success on our own terms. We get to go after our goals and our dreams our own way, even if it seems risky, crazy, or unusual because you’re not playing the wrong game. You were just handed the wrong manual. And so this series, Feminine Freedom, is your new one.

0:04:32 Carly: So it’s four episodes and they’re structured in what I believe is a very nice, real order of reclaiming your freedom. And it’s based on my own story of how I went from burned out to bold. So if you’ve been here from the beginning, you’ve probably heard my piece, a piece of my story in episode one, my lobster moment. But for this series, here’s a little bit more of what you need to know about me. So I spent the first 30 years of my life doing everything right.

0:05:05 Carly: Straight A’s, internships, certifications. I grinded, I pushed, I achieved, and I won. And honestly, it wasn’t all bad. I actually landed my dream job guiding travelers in Southeast Asia, living and working in this tiny village, one road in, one road out, yet know getting to meet people that were so different but so similar from me seeing kids and college kids lives transform from just one trip. I mean, honestly, it was what I call my early days of coaching, and it was incredible.

0:05:35 Carly: But when that chapter ended, I didn’t know how to stop achieving. So I kept pushing at work and at home. And I wore that whole strong, independent woman badge like it Was my entire identity. Because it was. And I became so obsessed with simply achieving that I forgot to ask, is this even important to me anymore? And so I lived that way for years. On autopilot, Stressed, disconnected, drained, perfect trifecta, of course, you know, and the only thing that was feeding my fulfillment was the very act of achievement I was searching for. Just a continuous stream of external validation, validating that I was smart and capable and successful.

0:06:19 Carly: Well, fortunately, our bodies are always fighting for us. And while they put up with a lot, they won’t stay silent forever. So years later, my body finally tapped out. Enter again, burnout, overwhelm, frustration, creative exhaustion, hormone issues. My body was finally forcing me to listen. It was finally screaming loud enough that I had to pay attention. And the only move that I knew how to make at that point, because I tried everything else, was to quit.

0:06:50 Carly: So I did. No backup plan, no job. Just in knowing that I could not keep living that way. And it eventually led to a vow to never again let my work destroy my health. But here’s what I didn’t know at the time. Until you regulate your nervous system and rewrite your subconscious patterns, you will keep repeating the same cycle. So that’s exactly what I did. I brought the hustle home with me, you know, and all of a sudden I started thinking, well, I’m home more so doesn’t that mean I guess I should just do all the cooking and I should do all the cleaning and I should do all the planning.

0:07:25 Carly: And without even realizing it, I just slid into this domestic default setting. Like I didn’t consciously choose that. There was just some subconscious programming that took over. And yet again though, it left me feeling frustrated and misaligned and overwhelmed. So thankfully, my body was showing up again. My body was telling me to pay attention. And I did. And that’s when I realized, well, I didn’t quit to become a housewife.

0:07:53 Carly: I quit to rest. I quit to heal. I quit to figure out who I was underneath all that achieving. And so thankfully, with the right tools and the support, I started coming back to life. And that’s when something wild happened. So I finally found the opportunity I had been looking for. I was craving a mentor, a community and a different way of doing things. And I found wasn’t just another 12 step plan with a money back guarantee. And it wasn’t another course on ad funnels and automations.

0:08:23 Carly: It was a group of badass multi six, seven and eight figure women doing business their way. Creative and intuitive and fucking unapologetic. And of course it was a five figure investment. And I thought to myself, I don’t have a job. This doesn’t make sense. There are no tangible outcomes, just talk of transformation. How am I going to explain this to everyone? What if it’s a total scam? What if I look like a fool?

0:08:52 Carly: It did not make sense. And I did not have a job. But you know what I did have? A savings and a choice. I could choose to keep playing small, gripping so tightly to what I had. I mean, truly, this, this money was giving me a false sense of success, honestly. Or I could bet on the life that I wanted. So with literal tears streaming down my face and my favorite dance song blasting in the background. And we do this because when we make these big purchases or we do these big risky leaps and these big scary moves, we actually want to create a positive experience around it so our nervous system gets used to it. But with tears, that’s a story for another day. Tears coming down my eyes. My favorite song blasting. I’m dancing it out. With my credit card in hand, I clicked submit.

0:09:39 Carly: And in that moment, everything changed. Truly, because money is a frequency. It responds to your energy. So when I showed the universe that I trusted myself, that I believed in what I wanted, even without proof, things started to open up. But from a young age, we’re taught that women aren’t good with money. Through media, through movies, you see it everywhere. That we should save, we should skip again on the fucking five dollar latte and be careful with our funds.

0:10:11 Carly: But meanwhile, men are taught to invest and take risks and play big. But I chose to believe something different. Money is also a mindset. Okay? I chose to believe that one. There are no wrong choices. I’m going to just make the decision right. But if I did make the wrong choice, I could get that money back. Because I’m the source of my success. Not a job, not a partner, not a plan. So why this series?

0:10:38 Carly: Because choosing to prioritize my health, reject the outdated norms around home and invest boldly in my wealth, I received the one thing that I was always chasing. My happiness. The kind that doesn’t need to be earned. The kind that comes from nowhere except within yourself. And the kind that returns when you start living life on your own terms. So this is what feminine freedom is all about. And over the next four episodes, we’re gonna dive into one.

0:11:13 Carly: Your health, your body is not a machine. We’re going to talk all about 28 day rhythms and not 24 hour ones. We’re going to talk about the home, how to ditch this domestic default and embrace the power of who not how. We’re going to talk about wealth and how to rewire scarcity and step into bold, unapologetic self investment. And then of course, we’re going to talk about happiness. Because joy is not frivolous. It’s necessary.

0:11:42 Carly: So you’ve heard my story and I’m so excited to dive into yours. Each episode is going to mainly focus on research, right? Bringing some awareness statistics to these topics. And then it’s also going to include mindset shifts, real tools and practical action that you can take right now. Because you’re not here to do it all. You’re here to let it flow. You’re here to start writing a rule book that actually makes sense for you and to not have a life that is just about staying sane. Oh my God, we’re here for so much more and this series is going to be the first step in that direction.

0:12:25 Carly: So Part one is going to drop next week. Of course, every week, every Wednesday is when my episodes drop. Be sure to subscribe, follow along if you have not already. But if you also want to get reminders about when the episodes drop or some summaries on what they’re about, join the Weekly Brew, which is my weekly email the link to join that is in the show notes. It should be in the footer. And then it’s also on my Instagram page. So just click the link in my bio and you will find there.

0:12:55 Carly: Yeah, I’m so excited. This has again been something I’ve been wanting to talk about for a while now, so I’m so excited to see it come into fruition. I promise it’s going to be good. So stick around and as always, stay bold, stay balanced and I will see you all next week.