#209 - Joby Martin // Loving Your Wife Starts With Loving Jesus

We call men to start where Scripture starts: submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, then love your wife as Christ loved the church. Marriage changes when the husband abides in Jesus and the Spirit grows real fruit, not quick fixes.

• sword of the Spirit as our daily weapon
• week-long focus on being a godly husband
• Ephesians 5 call to sacrificial, sanctifying love
• biggest decisions: who is Lord, who is wife
• abiding in Christ as the non-negotiable source
• fruit of the Spirit over tips and tricks
• moving toward Jesus before moving toward your wife
• practical repentance, presence, nourishment and cherishing

Before you go, if you want to help equip other men for the fight, share this podcast around and leave us a five star rating and review

Chapters

• 0:01 Framing The Fight And Focus
• 0:22 A Week On Godly Husbandry
• 0:50 Ephesians 5: Husbands And Christlike Love
• 1:52 The Two Biggest Life Decisions
• 3:20 Abide In Christ Or Achieve Nothing
• 4:19 Fruit Of The Spirit Over Tips
• 4:46 Move Toward Jesus, Then Your Wife
• 5:04 Closing And Call To Action

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:01

Welcome to the Daily Blade. The word of God is described as the sword of the Spirit, the primary spiritual weapon in the Christian's armor against the forces of evil. Your hosts are Joby Martin and Kyle Thompson, and they stand ready to equip men for the fight. Let's sharpen up.

SPEAKER_01: 0:20

Welcome back to the Daily Blade. We're going to spend all week on what it means to be a godly husband. We're going to be rooted in Ephesians chapter 5, beginning with verse 21. The Bible says, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Verse 22 says, Wives. Now, there's a couple of more verses after this, but honestly, fellas, this is not for you, that's for her. And if you'd spend less time on how she should act and more time on where you need to tighten up, trust me, your marriage would be better. By the time you get to verse 25, the Bible says, Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of the water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one has ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. All right, boys. Who you marry will be the second biggest decision that you ever make in your entire life. That's right. The girl that you decide to marry will be the second biggest decision that you ever make in your life. The first biggest decision that you will ever make in your life is who is your Lord. And so the number one decision is talked about here in chapter 5, verse 21. It says, Submit to one another. That's talking about your marriage. So the way that you are going to be able to submit to one another as a husband and wife is this, out of reverence for Christ. So let me ask you, boys, do you revere Christ? If you don't revere Christ, if you don't know Jesus, if you don't love Jesus, if you have not submitted and surrendered your life to the Lordship of Jesus Christ, then I do not know how to tell you how to be a husband. I mean, at that point, it's just a crapshoot. Hopefully you chose wisely and your personalities match up, okay? But if you don't know Jesus, I don't know how to tell you to be a husband because the Bible's going to tell us that we are to love our wives like Christ loved us. And what you are going to need in order to be the husband that God has called you to be is you are going to need the power of the Spirit of God working in and through you to pull this off. Tips and tricks will not be enough. Communication styles will not be enough. A book of love languages will not be enough. You need the power of God working through you. And the good news is if you have surrendered your life to Christ, then anything is possible for you. John chapter 15, verse 4, Jesus says this: Abide in me and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine, you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit. Apart from me, you can do nothing. In other words, do you know what you can do apart from Christ to improve your marriage? The answer is nothing. But what you need to do in order to improve your marriage is draw closer and closer to Jesus, to lean into his word, to abide in his word, to cultivate the things that stir your affections for the Lord, to cut out the sin that is hindering your relationship with the Lord. And Jesus says that as you abide in him and he abides in you, then he through you will produce or bear much fruit. And what is the fruit that Jesus produces in the life of the believer? Well, we don't have to guess. Galatians 5 22 says, But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law. So this week we're not talking about tips and tricks. We are talking about fruit that is produced by the Spirit in you. And this is what you are going to need to be the husband that God has called you to be. So before you even start moving towards your wife for the sake of your marriage and the sake of your own joy and the sake of your children, first start moving towards Jesus so that you can be the man that God has called you to be. Come back tomorrow and we'll keep digging in.

SPEAKER_00: 5:04

Thank you for listening to today's episode. Before you go, if you want to help equip other men for the fight, share this podcast around and leave us a five star rating and review. Stay sharp.