Joy Inspired Podcast

Season 2: Episode 12- From Breakdown to Breakthrough

• Nikki Cruise • Season 2 • Episode 12

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Episode Summary:

In this powerful episode, Nikki Cruise sits down with Lindsay Stadel, an entrepreneur, multi-business owner, and coach, who shares her courageous journey through mental health struggles, broken relationships, and personal transformation. Lindsay opens up about her experiences with depression, anxiety, suicide attempts, and how her faith became her lifeline. Through her story, she delivers a powerful message: You are enough, and God never writes people off. This episode is a heartfelt reminder that our struggles do not define us—our resilience and purpose do.

Key Takeaways:

  • Joy is not a reward but a strategy to navigate life’s challenges.
  • God never writes people off; He writes them in, even through brokenness.
  • Mental health struggles like depression and anxiety are real and deserve open conversation.
  • Forgiveness, especially self-forgiveness, is a crucial step in healing.
  • Faith can serve as a lifeline during the darkest moments.
  • Surrounding yourself with supportive people can help you survive and thrive.
  • Purpose is revealed through surviving trials and choosing life over despair.

Scriptures Mentioned:

  1. Habakkuk 2:2 – “Write the vision and make it plain.”
  2. Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the plans I have for you.”
  3. Psalm 34:18 – “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.”
  4. Isaiah 41:10 – “Do not fear, for I am with you.”
  5. Philippians 4:13 – “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
  6. Psalm 147:3 – “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

Encouragement for Listeners:

  • Your struggles do not define your worth; you are enough as you are.
  • Faith is not a background character—it can be your lifeline.
  • Reach out for help; you are never too far gone.
  • Forgive yourself to unlock healing and transformation.
  • Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you.
  • Choosing life and hope is a radical act of courage.
  • Even after trauma, God can reveal your purpose.

✍️ Root Check Questions to Reflect On:

  1. Where in my life do I feel broken or overwhelmed, and have I allowed myself to acknowledge it?
  2. How can I practice self-forgiveness today for past mistakes or decisions?
  3. Who are the supportive people in my life that I can lean on during difficult times?
  4. How is my faith helping me navigate current challenges?
  5. What steps can I take to protect my mental, emotional, and spiritual health?
  6. How can I embrace my purpose, even through pain or past failures?

Lindsay’s journey teaches us that acknowledging our pain, forgiving ourselves, and leaning on God can transform despair into hope and action.

Connect with Lindsay Stadel

Social Media: Lindsay Stadel
Email: lindsaystadel@gmail.com

Free Resource for Listeners: From Breaking Point to Breakthrough. A Guide to Protect Your Mind, Strengthen Your Faith, and Find Purpose in the Pain

Click here to download!

Stay Connected with Nikki:

Closing Encouragement:

 “You were created for a unique purpose. When you invite God into your business, you step into a calling that impacts eternity. Remember, alignment doesn’t mean perfection—it’s a journey of trust, surrender, and joy.”

Until next time, stay blessed, stay joyful, and keep walking in your purpose!

SPEAKER_01

Welcome to the Joy-Inspired Podcast. I'm Nikki Cruz, and I'm thrilled to explore with you what it means to walk in a faith-infused business. This is your space to find powerful tools and insights, to build with resilience and to create impact through your unique purpose, discovering a joy that only God can provide. Together, let's embrace a business journey anchored in faith and empowered by joy. Let's jump in. Well, hello there, beautiful people. It's Nikki Cruz, the Joy Junkie for the Joy Inspired Podcast, and I am so excited to be here with you this week. You know, this is the place where we fuse faith, mindset, purpose, and tons of joy into the entrepreneurial journey. I'm your host, and I'm here to remind you that joy isn't what comes at the end. Joy is the strategy that gets you through to the end. And my friends, today's episode is going to blow you away. Buckle up your spiritual seatbelts because we're about to dive in deep with a woman whose story is going to both bless you, shake you, and stretch you and remind you why God never writes people off. You know what he does? So today I have the absolute honor of welcoming this amazing woman. So grab your coffee, grab your pen, your notebook, and take a deep breath. Get ready for it. While I introduce you to the amazing Lindsay Stadle. She's an entrepreneur, multi-business powerhouse, and I do mean multi-business powerhouse, but she's also a coach, a mom, an author of a life-changing message. And she brings so much power forward. And her message is you are enough. Not you will be enough someday, not when you perform better, not when you finally feel worthy, but right now. And she shares that message from God for you. So let's get into this conversation of breakdowns, breakthroughs, faith, courage. Put it all together in this amazing, radical love of God story that hicks up every single time and puts tears in the eyes. Lindsay, my friend, I'm so excited to have you here. Thank you for saying yes to sharing your heart, your story, and joining us on this journey.

SPEAKER_00

Thank you, Nikki. I'm so glad that you invited me here.

SPEAKER_01

I you know, you are an amazing woman. All on its own, and an even more amazing woman when you share your story. You run a business ecosystem. So for those of you entrepreneurs out there who are going, I'm an entrepreneur, I have business. Listen to this lady, she has wisdom. And we all go through that at times. But one thing about Lindsay is she is as humble as anything. You've got four businesses plus a coaching business. My friend, you're running your own ecosystem here at this point with a number of challenges because you've chosen to be resilient and not give up. Tell us about your businesses. Tell us who you serve and what lights you up about the work that you do.

SPEAKER_00

Okay. Well, I am married to a farmer. I never thought that I would be a farm girl, but I absolutely love it. We own and operate four businesses, our saddle farms, where we raise and feed cattle. We have S Harvesting, where we go out into the cornfields with the big John Deere equipment and chop up all the corn into silage for those cattle. We have Flint Hills Transport, which is our over-the-road trucking company where we haul cattle and we also haul commodities like feed for the cattle. And then we also have TLS Logistics where we search for other drivers and keep them on the road. So we have all four of those businesses in the agriculture field. And besides that, I'm, yes, starting my breakthrough coaching business because I believe that what's the saying? If he brings you to it, he will bring you through it. Yep. He brought me to it in a number of ways, and he brought me through it, and that's why I'm here today. And so I'm just starting out with my business, my breakthrough coaching business. But I also have life experience that you might not have ever talked to someone before with the experience that I have. I jumped out of a moving vehicle trying to end my life. And it did work. I was successful. But then I wasn't successful because I'm here today. And I'm here today to share my story of mental health crisis, anxiety, depression, suicide, because I don't want anybody else to go through what I went through. Suicide's not a bad word. It is a scary word, and I will give everybody that, you know, that right to think that it's a scary word, but it's not a bad word. It needs to be talked about as open and as honestly as if you've got the flu or you have a broken bone. So I'll rewind a little bit and tell you exactly what got me to that fateful day. I had been married for 12 years, and the marriage had turned cold and mean. There was a lot of emotional abuse, a lot of hurtful, hurtful words. And he never physically um abused me. But he was in a sense uh narcissistic. Sorry. I have nerve pain, daily nerve pain, all day, every day, because of my decision to jump out of the truck. And I'll I'll get to that here in a little bit. But my, like I said, my marriage turned cold, turned hard. And today we are friends. We're able to co-parent. He has turned a new leaf and he is an amazing father. So I don't want anybody to think bad about him because he is a new man. But back then, you know, things just were not going the way that I thought my life would go. I thought I'd be successful, I thought I'd have an amazing family. I did have and I do have two amazing kids, but it just was not the life that I had envisioned for myself. And I started volunteering at the local fire department, and I absolutely loved it. I I was seen support. I wasn't one of those that went into burning buildings and rescued people. I that was not my cup of tea, but I was seen support. I was there to direct traffic or to keep loved ones from coming up onto an accident or, you know, just that, those kind of things. And like I said, I loved it, absolutely loved it. I did get to go out and fight actually fight fire in a burning pasture. That was amazing. But my husband didn't think that I should be doing that. I was one of two, one of three women on a completely male-dominated fire department, and they became my best friends, my confidants, my protectors. You know, they they were an amazing group of people. And I felt at home and I felt at peace when I was there. And while I was there, I found my best friend. He was my partner um on the force, and we talked about everything. And I told him one day that I was contemplating divorcing my husband, and he told me that if I was gonna divorce him, then he and the fire department would be there to help me move out or to help me just fight the mental, you know, anguish that comes along with it. And so he and I grew close. He too was in a very loveless relationship, and that one had, I mean, he had been married for over 20 years, and he was also starting the divorce process, so we were really there to help each other. And my divorce became final in August of 2016. His divorce came final in September of 2016, and from then, I mean, we both had an amazing, a new outlook on life, and I unfortunately very quickly jumped into a relationship with another man who, again, mentally abusive, emotionally abusive. But he and his daughter were both physically abusive to me, and I didn't think I deserved anything better. My partner on the force told me that I did. All of my fellow firefighters told me that I deserved better, but I didn't believe them because that's what I had grown up with being treated bad. So over the matter of about six months, I my relationship with that man was on again, off again. Okay. And then my best friend and I decided, well, we're so close. We know what each other's gonna say, we know what each other's gonna do at a scene, and we thought, what the heck? Let's give it a shot. So I started dating my partner, and again, on again, off again. We were so much alike that I think it was almost bad or toxic at the time. And so there were two men that I was dating on again, off again, off again. My abuser and my best friend who very quickly turned into my savior. So we're gonna fast forward to September of 2017. His birthday is September 1st. And even though he and I were not talking, my my best friend, he and I were not talking at that time because we both decided we needed a little bit of space. I still went to his house and I just really I broke down. I told him how I needed help, help getting out of that relationship. So we started rebuilding our friendship and rebuilding my mental health. And you know, it just again, we decided we were gonna start dating each other, but I had yet to break it off with the gentleman who was my abuser. And at the time, my best friend's boys did not want he and I to have any relationship at all. And one of his boys on September 24th of 2017, one of his boys saw us together. We were driving around country roads, because we live in a rural community, country roads, drinking, laughing, singing the songs, having a good time, because that's what you do out here, you know. And one of his boys saw us and told him he had to choose, and I did not take that well. I told him that he needed to take me back to my car because I wanted to go home. And pretty much right as after that, my mind went blank. I don't remember the conversation from his house to my car, which was probably about eight miles. I don't remember anything except for reaching for the door handle of his truck, the light in his truck coming on, you know, because cab lights come on when you open the door, and then I remember screaming. We were going about 30 miles an hour down a gravel road, and I decided that I had hadn't had enough. I had put so many people through so much. My kids, I lied, I cheated, I stole anything and everything that I could do just to keep afloat at that time. And I thought that my kids would be better off without me. I thought that the world would be better off without me. So I jumped.

SPEAKER_01

And Lindsay and listeners, can you imagine? And if you can, and if your hearts are breaking at the moment, because you can relate, get the Holy Spirit into that place. Because you're being given permission by God to recognize it. And for others of you, you may be listening and going, but but why? What was so bad? When we come from a place of depression, anxiety, where there is an absence of joy, we take on so much more than what is real. And Lindsay was sitting in this place where this was like the end of the world to her, so much so that instead of wanting to protect herself, she wanted to protect the world from her. And she chose to jump. And I know, Lindsay, and I thank you for sharing your story because that takes a lot of courage. It takes a lot of courage. And hey, can anyone else there relate when you say, you know, I did the relationship wrong, and then I did another one wrong? And then again, like, you know, what was wrong? Why didn't I see it? It must be me. It must be me. No, you are enough. And this is exactly the message that Lindsay has learned. So now that you've all had a chance to grab your tissues, now that you feel the Holy Spirit moving, just take a moment and open your hearts. And Father God, I just pray right now, if there is anybody out there who is feeling this lonely and desperate, that you would come right now, comfort them. Move into the space that they're in right now, and give them the courage to reach out. Not to shut down, but to reach out. Thank you, Father. And folks, there are there are in the description links of people that you can connect to. You can reach out to myself, you can reach out to Lindsay. You are never too far gone. You might feel it, but you are not. So I just wanted to interrupt and say that because you need to hear that before you look at this, because you are hearing the story to this point. But look at this amazing woman that you can see here. But it didn't flip over overnight. And I want to honor your bravery and your openness in talking about and sharing this. And what I know now is that your faith wasn't just a quiet background character, it was your lifeline. So, what happened from that moment, Lindsay, when you chose to jump?

SPEAKER_00

Well, I didn't jump because I wanted to die, I jumped because I wanted others to live without the pain that I was putting them through. And I do not recall anything after that for 24 hours because I was life flighted to a trauma center where I underwent surgery because of the way that I landed. Basically, I landed on my face and it turned my head so severely that skin from my forehead was torn down, and my left arm was limp, and they couldn't figure out why. So when I woke up in the hospital, I was bald. They had to shave my head to do surgery to stitch me back up, and they had me on suicide watch in the hospital. And when I woke up, the very first thing, Nikki, that I thought of was why didn't it work? And then the second thing that I thought of is I realized that my daughter is sitting next to me in the hospital. The second thing I thought of was my kids wouldn't have known why. Why did mom leave? And it was at that point that I realized that I was supposed to be here. You can't die and be brought back to life unless you have a purpose. And so I was in the hospital for a week, and then I went to live with my mom and dad because I was told that, or they were told, that I needed to not be alone. And I lived there for two weeks. Um, and you know, my kids were never in danger because I never thought about hurting myself when I was with my kids. It was when I was alone that I was hurting. And no, I wasn't alone that night, but I felt alone. Yeah. So my family had an intervention, convinced me to self-commit to a mental hospital, which I did. And for the first couple days, I felt like I didn't belong there because here are all these people that you know have are having all of these huge things going on in their lives, and they're here for these reasons. And here I am feeling like I am playing an act, you know, playing a part in a play.

SPEAKER_01

Or I'm here feeling like uh uh that I'm an imposter because I'm trying Can I pause you there because I think this is such an important point, you know, and we see it on the two sides of faith because we see people who don't believe they have a story or a testimony because they didn't have a dramatic enough conversion or offend happen in their life, they weren't healed out of a wheelchair like I was, so they don't actually have a story, or they didn't have something extremely bad happen to them, so they don't have the right to feel the pain they're in, and that's what you're talking about, folks. When you feel the pain, you're feeling it, and it doesn't matter if nobody else can relate or understand it. Jesus does, and that pain is real, and I want to encourage you to recognize that nobody gets to tell you that what you're feeling isn't real, it may not make sense to them, they might may not see that it's justified, you may not even see that it's justified, but until you try and justify it enough and realize that that's not the point, the pain is what you need to deal with. The brokenness is there, it doesn't matter why. And that is something we miss so often because we want to look at the reasons why. And often I think that's done out of our heart of trying to understand people, but it ends up becoming a self-judgment and an other's judgment. If you are feeling pain, your pain is real. You get to own how you feel, and you get to deal with it. You have permission to be who you are. And I just wanted to interrupt Lindsay there because she realized that in that moment. And you think, uh-uh, I don't belong here, not because you think you're the exception to the rule or better than anybody, you almost feel like you're not as bad as everybody else, so you have no right to get the help. That is the lie of the enemy, folks. That is the lie of the enemy. Go ahead, Lindsay.

SPEAKER_00

Thank you. So I remember sitting in group therapy, and we're supposed to write letters to each other or to ourselves. We're supposed to write letters to ourselves, letters to our past self and letters to our future self. And also I did was stare at a blank piece of paper. Because how am I gonna tell my past self to watch out for these signs when I couldn't even see them myself? And how am I gonna tell my future self that it's okay to heal from this when I didn't believe that I had the right to be living? And so my letter was I forgive you. I felt something going through my body at that specific moment. I didn't write, I forgive myself. I didn't write, I'm okay. I didn't write you're lucky to be alive. I wrote, I forgive you. And I think the reason why I wrote that is because he was telling me to, because he was telling me he forgave me. And so that was really the turning point in my recovery. I spent a week at the mental health facility, and when I left there, I went back to my house and decided I need to get out of, get out of the small community I was living in because there were so many rumors, and I'm not gonna be able to heal physically or mentally if I'm hearing people talking about me everywhere I go. So I moved only about 30 minutes away, but far enough away that I could heal. Yeah, I tried to start living my life again, but my left arm was still limp. I couldn't move it. And so I started seeing doctor after doctor after doctor. Ended up being told that I have a brachial plexus injury, which means that my nerves were pulled out of my spinal column, completely torn apart, because of the impact. You know, when I laid it on my face and my head turned so severe, the that tore the nerves in my left arm. And so the pain that I was feeling, it was phantom pain. Because when my nerves, when your nerves aren't attached to each other, you shouldn't be feeling anything. But my brain is sending out pain signals because there's something wrong. Yeah. And I ended up going to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota, being told that I do have post-traumatic brachial plexopathy, brachial plexus injury for short, um, and that there was nothing that they could do. Wow. When your nerves are completely torn apart, you can't just you know stitch them back together. They did tell me that they could attempt to reroute some nerves into my arm by taking a nerve from the back of each of my legs, taking a nerve from my chest wall and rerouting it and laying them in my arm to kind of give a new pathway, but that it wasn't guaranteed. Oh, I decided I needed to try anyways, because if I didn't try, I would always think, what if? And you know, I was told I went through some intense psychiatric therapy, and my therapist gave me an expression that I use to this day. What if equals fear? If I hadn't gone through all the surgeries, I'd have been thinking, what if? What if this went wrong? What if this went wrong? But on the flip side, she says, even if equals faith. Well, even if this goes wrong or this goes wrong or this doesn't heal, then what am I going to do to help myself? So I started some very intense physical therapy as well. I had a total of eight surgeries from September 24th of 2017 through February of 2020. And went through, like I said, some intense psychiatric help, some intense physical therapy. And I do have movement back. I can use my arm to support not much more than 15 pounds, but for short periods. But I do have use of my arm. I can hold things, I can support things. You know, it's funny when you can't use your hand anymore, you start to realize things that you're not going to be able to do for yourself or do easily. I can't put a bra on as like I would, like I used to be able to, you know, with both hands behind my back. I have a hard time buttoning my jeans. I cannot tie my shoes. So all my shoes that I wear have the elastic bands. Um, I cannot type on my computer with two hands. I only have one hand now.

SPEAKER_01

So much that so many people take for granted. And I can relate to that from when I was in my wheelchair and couldn't do things. And you know what? I would encourage you, you folks listening, just to build up your understanding and empathy for people and to elevate your gratitude to God for your ability. Put a sock over one of your hands today, and just see how even that, not having the use of your fingers individually, affects you. And then show God the gratitude for all the ability you do have. Because it doesn't matter what is wrong, we don't live in lack, we live in abundance. So have gratitude for all that you do have. You see Lindsay sitting here now, and we're close to being out of time for today. So I'm gonna invite you to come back next week and listen to the other half of this redemptive story because you've only heard a little bit of the redemption. But ladies and gents, she is sitting here right now, and we are gonna hear the rest of the story. But one of the things you hit on so powerfully, Lindsay, there was that so many people carry shame around their lowest points. And in that shame, we withdraw. It's in that place of shame that God wants you to go to him. You you don't you don't need to hide from him that he wants to be in that place with you so he can comfort you and heal you in it. But Lindsay, we're gonna pick up on next week's episode because you have chosen to carry purpose. And I want us to focus on that, and I want people to see and hear the redemption that has come through your story, not just for you, and the power of that. So just remember, folks, if you're sitting with dry eyes, think hard about what you're protecting yourself from feeling because it means you're not connecting with something that's there. If you've had tears dropping this morning, let Jesus into that vulnerable place. And don't forget to reach out. Ask someone to pray with you. Share where you're at. Do not hide your mental anguish, do not hide your depression, your anxiety, your shame. Don't say I don't deserve to live the dream life God intended for me. Because that's not true. God wants all of us to live in joy. So be sure to check out the show notes below and to get Lindsay's details to go ahead and follow her. And please, if you know somebody that this episode will encourage, please share it with them. And Lindsay, we'll be back next week to hear the second half of your story. But what is one word of encouragement or one scripture you can share with the women out there who might just be feeling dry and lonely and in that place of thinking, I have no reason to complain, but I've lost my joy.

SPEAKER_00

You know, I've done a lot of thinking about what a like a one-line my my drop my mic, you know, statement would be. And it starts it does start with you are enough, but it continues with let's see, you are enough. No more pretending, no more hiding, just unapologetically, you should not have to apologize for being yourself, and you are perfectly and wonderfully made, and you may have made mistakes, you may have made bad choices.

SPEAKER_01

God is not beyond redeeming your life and letting you live in the abundance of his kingdom and having four businesses and a wonderful family and moving forward and using whatever mistakes you had made in the past as a beautiful message to move forward into the future and encourage others, just as Lindsay did. So, folks, tune in next week and in the meantime, stay joyful, stay focused on the Lord, on his words, on what he says about you. And remember, joy isn't just a feeling, it's a strategy that you get to choose. It's not your backup plan, it's your blueprint. I hope that sunk into your head already, folks. And you, yes, you listening, are enough. I'm Nikki Cruz, and I'll see you next week for another joy-filled, faith-filled episode. To finish this conversation, you will not believe what you hear. Blessings all. Lindsay, thank you so much.

SPEAKER_00

Thank you, Nikki.

SPEAKER_01

Thank you so much for joining me on the Joy Inspired Podcast at www.joyinspiredpodcast.com. Make sure you hit that subscribe button so that you can get this and every other episode that comes out. We have lots of great stuff coming, and you don't want to miss it. So make sure to hit that subscribe. I am so grateful for all the reviews and comments, and I look forward to serving you in next week's episode.