Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo
Welcome to Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo – the no-holds-barred podcast where we dive into the week’s hottest topics with unfiltered opinions, razor-sharp wit, and a healthy dose of dark humor. Nothing is off-limits as we tackle everything from pop culture and current events to life’s absurdities, all while keeping it raw, real, and ridiculously entertaining.
Grab a drink, sit back, and prepare to laugh, cringe, and maybe even question your life choices – we’re here to talk shit, and we’re not holding back.
Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo
From Tesla Ethics to Zombie Apocalypse Strategies: A Rambling Journey
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Two friends relaxing on the couches take you on a wild conversational journey that defies categorization. With Angelo absent, Doug and Ryan explore the fascinating implications of Elon Musk's political pivot and how it might affect Tesla's customer base. They thoughtfully analyze how vehicle preferences often align with political identities—conservatives gravitating toward traditional American trucks while Tesla's futuristic aesthetic appeals to a different demographic.
The conversation flows organically into nostalgic territory as they reminisce about car culture's evolution through iconic film franchises. From the original Fast and Furious to classics like Dukes of Hazzard and Smokey and the Bandit, they trace how automotive entertainment has shaped generations of enthusiasts. This leads to a critical examination of dangerous modern trends like street takeovers and subway surfing, balancing humor with genuine concern about thrill-seeking behaviors.
Perhaps the most entertaining segment emerges when they debate zombie apocalypse survival strategies. Their unexpectedly detailed plan involving securing ports and assembling a fleet of boats demonstrates creative problem-solving skills that are both absurd and strangely practical. The hosts' natural chemistry shines through their rapid transitions between topics—from the Marx Brothers' comedy legacy to the frustrating business model of Tesla selling cars with artificially disabled features that require additional payment to activate.
Throughout this rambling yet engaging episode, Doug and Ryan showcase their ability to find humor and insight in unlikely places. Their authentic, unfiltered conversation style creates an intimate listening experience that feels like joining friends for an evening of thought-provoking banter. Whether debating the ethics of subscription-based services or pondering hypothetical fight scenarios, they maintain a conversational warmth that keeps you invested in even the most outlandish discussions. Ready to join this unpredictable conversation? Hit play and see where these wandering minds take you next.
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Welcome Back to the Couches
Speaker 1Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to the couches. As always, this is your host. Don't Know Shit, doug. I'm hanging out on the couch tonight with Ryan. Angelo decided to take the week off because he's a lazy son of a bitch. May you burn in hell, angelo. Whole day, yep, yep, whole day. Whole week. He's gone. He's gone. Yeah, he left us. Left us on the couch. Yeah, hosting alone. Nah, we miss you, buddy. Yeah, you can still burn in hell, though, wow, torture him so, ry, how are you, buddy? How was your week?
Speaker 2My week was pretty good, not too bad. Anything eventful happen, not really it rained.
Speaker 1Yeah, eventful happen, not really it rained.
Speaker 2No, yeah, yeah you didn't have a protest in your front yard or anything like that. No, no, no, no. I was driving around and I saw a uh, I saw a tesla with a sticker on it that said I bought this before elon went crazy oh well, ouch yeah I'm sorry, I don't think I don't think elon went crazy.
Speaker 1I think everybody just turned their back on him.
Speaker 2Oh, for sure no. I don't believe the sticker, but I believe that it was a liberal driving.
Speaker 1Oh well he's driving a Tesla. I was talking to my dad about this earlier today and I'm like unfortunately. I do appreciate the fact that Elon made the major sacrifice by kind of walking away from his business to go and push for what he believes in politically and unfortunately, going against the liberal party was going against his like major consumer base yeah elon, elon, you don't deserve this.
Speaker 1no, you don't, buddy, no you don't, and sorry, I mean your truck. Uh, as cool as, like people say, it is, anybody on the conservative side, they're going to buy a Ford, they're going to buy a Chevy, they're going to buy your atypical American backbone truck. Yeah.
Speaker 2Savage trucks? Not for me.
Speaker 1Not for me either.
Speaker 2No.
Speaker 1Yeah, I like Elon man. I was never into the cyberpunk scene like that futuristic thing was never my jam. No, Nah, no, no, no. I only like neon for like a short period of my life. Oh, a neon, yeah, like the neon colors.
Speaker 2Oh, I thought you meant like the Dodge neon.
Speaker 1No, no, no, I'm actually not too familiar with that car. Was it a decent car?
Speaker 2No, it was a piece of shit, all right, I didn't know.
Speaker 1There's people out there who love them, I'm sure. Yeah, probably Fans of that shit. I feel like I've still got mine from 12th grade. Yeah, still going strong.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's a terrible car.
Speaker 1Is it still on the market?
Speaker 2No, no, they no longer sell that model. No, there's people that they like souped it up or whatever. You know. They sold parts for it, I think, but wasn't my cup of tea.
Speaker 1Is this like a honda, where you can just go down to the like the store and buy like?
Speaker 2it might.
Speaker 1It might have been like uh, yeah, an answer to honda you know, yeah, you pay a hundred dollars worth of parts and you can get like another 20 horsepower.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, yeah, you gotta know what you're doing, I guess but um well, with honda, no, you just.
Speaker 1I mean, it's cheap, you just run it until the thing pops. And then you just get new parts. They're like 20 bucks. Go down, put the thing back in.
Speaker 2Economically, yeah, the vehicle is pretty good Honda that is, in terms of like longevity and, yeah, the cost of parts typically were cheaper. I don't know how that is now.
Speaker 1Well, don't get me wrong. I mean, Honda makes one hell of a dirt bike. I mean, Honda's four-stroke is a beast. They're making Formula One racing engines now, which are absolutely incredible.
Speaker 2Really.
Speaker 1Oh yeah, no. So I mean, they definitely have their hand in a lot of different areas, but when it comes down to, let's say, our neck of the woods, the people that are riding around in hondas are buying them because they can buy cheap parts for them and they can soup them up and make them look like fast and furious cars yeah, yeah, well, that was an era for sure.
Speaker 2You know, the uh fast and the furious definitely helped that era of people who wanted to modify their vehicles and uh, do you think that era is over? Or for most, I think it's done. But uh, there are those guys out there who are like still enthusiasts and are still working on them, those cars you know to this day, and what's funny is like the vast majority of them have problems with police stopping them with their loud cars and stuff. So like, uh, yeah, it was a fad.
Speaker 1I'm sure there's a list there. I think there's like domestic disputes and like like strong armed robberies up that alley, like yeah I mean I've been.
Tesla, Elon Musk, and Car Culture
Speaker 2I wasn't really part of that scene, but I mean, you know, I did drive around a lot as a, you know, a teenager or whatever yo I I saw fast and furious, they'll steal your safe.
Speaker 1Yeah and drive it down the road and bring a tank with them, okay, so you gotta watch out for those type of people.
Speaker 2Yeah, I think that was it. That wasn't, that wasn't uh. That movie was uh italian job. Which one the mini coopers when they pull the safe right, isn't that it?
Speaker 1uh, they do that through the sewers, but I believe in one of the fastest later. Fast and furious oh, no I think I think it was. Yeah, there was like a double cable that was one.
Speaker 2Oh, that was. That was with the uh, yeah, with the rock, right uh yeah, that one had the rock in it.
Speaker 1He was in a couple of them and then john cena came oh then it was it right.
Speaker 2Well, no, I mean they're coming up with a new one, right?
Speaker 1well, probably why not? I mean, the franchise still makes money even though it's absolutely terrible. The newest one was at garbage. I mean it was dog shit, but I sat through it. I watched the whole thing, yeah, and like I was still rooting for the like dog shit movie. I enjoyed the first one, oh yeah, the first one, I mean.
Speaker 1Most first movies, most introductory movies are the best I mean that's like where you start your journey with these people and like, unfortunately, it's the second and third movie, whether it was written part of like a chronicle, where the author actually sat down and like thought it all the way through. Or the first one made a shit ton of money, so they're like, ah, we better make a second one so we can make a shit more. Like shit, more money. And that's how everyone's the franchise is. When, like they, there is no actual direction going from the first one into the second one, it's just a cash grab. They're like we need more money. This thing made us a shit ton of money. Let's get all our writers to go ahead and work on this thing. And it's never as good as the authentic thing that was created out of someone's hardship or someone's happiness.
Speaker 2I mean, the story did go on, so I don't Listen. I watched it and I've seen quite a few of them. I'm not a super fan or anything like that, but watching it know. Uh, yeah, there was consistency from the first one to the second one. There was still the same, as long as I guess they included some of the same members. The plot was kind of different, right, but, like you know, some members were still there. I don't remember the specifics, but I do remember there is some. The story continued, right, so it wasn't like it was completely out of the water. Weird surprise things kind of were supposed to happen. Did they happen? I don't remember, but it was one of those franchises.
Speaker 1Hell of a storyteller. Let me tell you If you ever need someone to come to your campfire and keep you riveted.
Speaker 2Are you on the edge of your seat? Don't invite me, because I ain't going to have a good story.
Speaker 1You guys will go to sleep early that night. I'm all over the fucking place.
Speaker 2I remember the first one. That's all I really cared about. I think that there was some cohesiveness between the first, second, third. What was that girl's name? Lottie or whatever? What was that? His girlfriend or his sister, or somebody like came back from like the dead or some shit? The problem is that I don't remember the story and so I'm like, ah man, I know that it was, it kind of followed, you know. But anyway, I didn't even want to talk about Honda's or any of that stuff.
Speaker 1I wanted to get into how strange elon musk was. What? What? Hold on, okay, I'm sorry we drifted, we did. Oh well, I liked how you used that. You used the car term yeah, we drifted around that corner, look at you, go all right, um, okay, we can roll back to not that tokyo drift I mean, yeah, um another, another fast and furious reference, all right yeah, all day we're just gonna keep throwing them out all night I'm just gonna read, though, like something else, we're gonna bring one out, nah, man but, um, so yeah, no, um, the fast and furious franchises were.
Speaker 1We're decent for what they were. I mean, they progressively got worse and worse and then they had to bring on larger and larger actors to keep the boat afloat. And that's where we're at right now. I mean guys like explosions, aliens and tits and aliens with big, exploding tits. So I mean you give them a movie that's in that movie. No, I was like I'm trying to dig it out, like I don't remember Men in Black. I was like I'm trying to dig it out.
Speaker 2I don't remember Men in Black. I'm all confused right now.
Speaker 1Oh, you missed the fifth one.
Speaker 2I guess so.
Speaker 1That's when shit got weird. They're like oh, chargers in space, baby.
Speaker 2What's with that man? What's with all these movie things going into space?
Speaker 1Well, they kind of take it to space. Space is the final frontier, I guess.
Speaker 2So I mean, what was it like Jason versus Freddie in space, or something like that?
Speaker 1Oh, no, no, no, Jason versus Freddie was back here, like at Camp Crystal Lake. They started off in what was it? On Elm Street and from Elm Street they were led back to Camp Crystal Lake and that's where you had the big fight, which wasn't that big of a fight. I think they should have, like, really drawn that out a bit bigger. But that's from a big horror fan. So, yeah, they never went to space, but Jason did. Jason, actually, jason's like a children's novel. Yeah, jason goes to summer camp. Jason goes to New York. Jason goes to. Yeah, jason goes to wherever. Jason's on a new adventure. Where's jason going today? Jason brought his machete and he's off to see the camp. Oh, jason brought his machete, he's off to see new york city. And, like, we're on another adventure with jason vorhees, so pack your bags and, ladies and gentlemen, we're off to see jason war, he's on another adventure yeah, man.
Speaker 2Um, we're just all over the place. Oh, I'm sorry, yeah, but uh, yeah. So no, as far as like the.
Speaker 2So the reason we talked about the cars in the first place was about you know honda right and the elan was, but the honda thing was that there was an error right, and I believe that fierce and the furious made it happen, or me, brought some more attention to it, which is the uh, you know, auto enthusiast hobby of like, uh, modifying and racing cars, right, um, but yeah, so like, uh, well, as far as um that goes today, I don't really think it's all that really there that much. I mean, there's a big euro thing, um, more so than I think, than the foreign in terms of like hondas so do you think for us?
Speaker 1and the furious like killed a generation, like that was the end of it, because, if you think about it, there was tons and tons of different movies about racing cars up until that point. So I mean, you had the what was it? Um, the good old boys, we just some good old boys. Um, duke's a hazard. Yeah, they were about driving fast cars and pushing moonshine. And then you went from that to, uh, smoky and the bandit dude got a trans. Am, sexy shit like that was awesome. Burt reynolds doing his thing, yeah, like, yeah. And so you had all that going on up until fast and furious and did fast and furious kill it. For, like, the next generation was. They were like oh, I don't want to be a car enthusiast if that's what a car enthusiast looks like um, maybe to an extent, but I don't really think so.
Speaker 2I think that, um, I think that it definitely just, you know, uh, glorified it a little bit and uh, people, you know it opened up more doors, so to speak, to people who you know they gained interest in enticed people. Oh hey, check out this whole thing that's happening here. Is it real? You know most people when they see it and it's funny, like you see it in the movies you're like, nah, that's not real, you know, but it is. Nitrous oxide is real.
Speaker 1Speaking of that, yeah, what is that little sport that the Utes of the inner city are doing these days, where they do like donuts in the middle of the intersection?
Speaker 2Oh, that's so stupid. Yeah, yeah, so does that have a name?
Speaker 1Yeah, intersection. Oh, that's so stupid. Yeah, yeah, so does that have a name? Yeah, it's called street takeover, street take wait. No, that sounds like a dance-off.
Speaker 2No, it's called a street takeover. So yeah, they've been doing it. It's dangerous what they're doing. I mean listen, now there's a time and a place for like doing donuts right, you know what I'm saying yeah, I used to do them. I ain't gonna lie, did them. You know, everybody tried it. You know what I'm saying. Of course, a parking lot. Yeah, nobody around.
Speaker 1Go to jones beach didn't want to really like.
Speaker 2I wasn't trying to show off with my with my donut, though you know I wasn't like maybe a couple, maybe it was a handful of people like in other cars, not a crowd. Let me do fucking donuts. Uh, uncontrollable donuts. I mean, come on, man, and you're like running over the crowd. Oh, smacking them with society.
Fast and Furious Franchise Discussion
Speaker 1Smacking them with society, hurting people, and then you have idiots hanging outside the car, oh and they're falling off of it and then getting ran over by the same vehicle. Oh, it's brutal. It's just like is that Gen Z? Yeah, I guess. I guess that's the new motor scene. Instead of actually driving your vehicle, you just go around in circles a lot.
Speaker 2Just act like a total tard and just go hardcore, run each other over oh, I've seen so many pieces get smacked off.
Speaker 2The vehicle like it goes around in circles, hits a light, light post, back fender, breaks off and you're like dude, my thing is like yeah, the people that get hurt, man, and like the, the car flips over and it falls on the fucking people who are hanging outside the window. And you know, luckily there's people there who try to help the people, but there's people, I'm sure, who were affected to this day permanently, like maybe disabled and or dead. So, it's like why, why, why?
Speaker 1If you were to put an urban Olympics together, do you think we should make this part of the urban Olympics?
Speaker 2An urban Olympics.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, so I'm thinking like the milk crate game. Yeah, so we do the milk crate game that was the hood olympics yeah, the hood, oh hood, olympics okay, so they did it in the hood, so do you think this should be an event as well?
Speaker 2you know, we'll put the car out there I mean it's kind of like a bull and it's like who can get out of the ring without I mean, it's one of the dumb things that people or I should say younger people are doing, and I don't know why.
Speaker 1Well, I mean in the subways. I honestly have heard the announcements as you're going through the subways and they're like please do not climb on top of the subways and surf the subways. It's moronic, you can get killed. And I'm killed and I was like, okay, and I've heard these for a while, but it wasn't until I took the, I think the r. You saw somebody do it. Yeah, I'm like, hey, I look, I look at the kids and the kids come out and get in between the two carts and like they're starting to climb up the chain and I'm looking at them. Now, mind you, I've I like to live on a little extreme in my life. I like to do a lot of crazy things, I mean okay, it's not on the edge.
Speaker 1Yeah, If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space. I don't know who said that. It's not my quote, but yeah it's a good quote.
Speaker 1So yeah, I'm. I'm looking at these two kids walking out and all of a sudden they start climbing on the chain. Think to myself, I'm like, oh man, like half of me, like the kid in me, wants to go join them so I can understand where the drive is, and the like excitement and the exhilaration of being able to like get up and like face your fears. But then, at the same time, I'm like there's a bunch of man-made shit that can just decapitate me instantly up there, like I mean thinking about the odds and yeah, you waited Right.
Speaker 1You were like, hmm, the risk versus the thrill, yeah, the risk or reward. I think the risk is way higher.
Speaker 2It is yeah, you're like ah, death or dismemberment or some thrill oh no, it could be Like, really think about the situation.
Speaker 1It could be way worse than that, because those tunnels I mean personally I don't walk those tunnels, so I don't know how many times those tunnels are walked. When it comes down to like professionals going through the subways after the fact, yeah, so you could actually like fall off into the subways and be like sitting there like with a broken hip not being able to get up. You're oh yeah you're pretty much like in the dark, in the in the dark in the fucking train coming in the nastiness in the slime.
Speaker 1No, no, no with the rats you'd want at this point in time you'd kind of want to be close enough to the train that it could take you out oh now you're like right, you're just like a little blob, you're a gimp off the side of the train, like honestly, there's too many things in those sewer systems that would like to eat you. You know like a horde of rats comes through your dead meat, a horde of cockroaches. You want to be dead meat. Like you, you'd want to be eaten by the rats.
Speaker 2at that point, let me ask you a question. Yeah, you ever seen Wile E Coyote?
Speaker 1I have several times I have.
Speaker 2You ever seen it when they go on top of the train and then fucking get hit by the tunnel? Yes, what Exactly? I mean, I would never want that.
Speaker 1You know what I'm saying, right?
Speaker 2Exactly Like oh, I'm on top of a train, I'm chasing a roadrunner. Oh, wait a minute, I'm not going to fucking fit shuttle boom, he hits the mountain, you know well.
Speaker 1Yeah, come on guys you've seen so many of the movies throughout time where they decided to fight on top of the train and it never worked out for the bad guy oh yeah, he always didn't look up in time to see the thing, the like obscure thing in his way that took him off. I mean, like the wolverine movie and like what was it? The trains, not train spotting, but the the train movie where they're going through and they're eating the bugs and the candy bars.
Speaker 2I don't know about that one. Oh yeah, I don't know that one.
Speaker 1All the rich people live in the front of the train and all the poor people live in the back of the train. No, I don't know that, and they're traveling over the frozen earth, frozen tundra, oh interesting.
Speaker 2Yeah, not seen that one. No.
Speaker 1That's definitely a rainy day movie.
Speaker 2I can never think of the name of it. So you guys find out. You guys can write in let us know what that is.
Speaker 1I know you guys know it, you're gonna be like dog. You're such an asshole. You don't know shit. Yeah, don't know.
Speaker 2Don't know shit, doug yeah yeah, I mean, you know there's a lot of thrill seekers out there. You know I'm saying, and like people are always gonna be doing crazy shit, whether it's fucking climbing on top of trains, surfing or fucking scaling the side of buildings with, just like you know, regular like rock climbing gear and like tape on their fingers- yeah, but I appreciate that guy yeah, yeah. Well, you like the sport right so I'm big into rock climbing.
Speaker 1I love rock climbing like I've seen some videos.
Speaker 2The other day the guy was like his hand was shaking. He's like oh, I'm tired, I need to rest. He's like a french guy.
Speaker 1French guy. Was that your French accent? It tried.
Speaker 2I like it.
Speaker 1We should go to a French restaurant this weekend. You can order everything. No, I'm good, anyway.
Speaker 2Yeah, so he's like panting and everything and I'm like why? I mean you know, and you know what's crazy he's like? He don't just go to the top, he scale back down.
Speaker 1Wait, he climbed down.
Speaker 2They go up and they go down.
Speaker 1That's not a very smart idea.
Speaker 2I don't know. It's a proof of skill. They have a statement that they're making. Part of me thinks that the statement I don't know what the statement is exactly.
Speaker 1Don't eat meat.
Speaker 2That might be part of it, that may be part of that may be one of the statements, but I think the most the main statement I think is that, like you know, the world used to be what it was before there was buildings. It was like mountains and trees and everything else Right. And so now animals use monkeys and everything else. Whatever he's able to climb things, now they can't. They can't climb the skyscraper, you know.
Speaker 1Right, you'll fucking in like a chimpanzee, just fucking bolt out the woods and start climbing up the fucking skyscraper. You don't see that well, I mean like in concept. Yeah, when it comes down to like some of these post-apocalyptic movies, you see how like new york city has been, like retained by mother nature, and plants are growing all over, true all oh, when it takes over, yeah. Which would happen if we allowed it to.
Speaker 2It's like seven days or like eight days after life stops on Earth or whatever, and they show you what it would look like.
Speaker 1The overgrowth.
Speaker 2I'm like damn, seven days, that's it. What the hell? No, no, no. They're working hard to keep that grass back.
Speaker 1Exactly.
Speaker 2Better not get rid of those illegal immigrants. I'm just thinking, I like the fucking chia pet if it grows green, you know when you put the seeds on it.
Speaker 1Yeah, that shit doesn't grow that big in a week. It takes like 28 days to get like big and puffy you know, speaking of 28 days later, you know what's crazy. Hold on a second, you know what's crazy what when you go to the like, the health food stores where all the richy-rich girls go in to buy the smoothie shakes and whatnot. Okay, yeah, you know chia seeds. Yes, yeah, it's the same shit.
Speaker 2Well, yay, yeah, ch-ch-ch-chia, I guess they just grow yeah. Yeah so you yeah, yeah, Well, I guess I don't know. I mean, maybe they roast them or something and they're just non-functional. But if you could literally just take them and not have to like just throw them in the ground and to grow, then spread them on your chia thing, Then that's amazing.
Speaker 1Right, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, oh man, I forgot what talking about before that though.
Speaker 1Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. I don't want to be that guy.
Speaker 2Yeah, I totally blasted it. That thought is gone.
Speaker 1Oh my bad. Well, you know what guys you can eat chia seeds.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, 28 days later came right back in there. Another thing, speaking about memory, real quick. Did you know, supposedly, if you would have been like no-transcript, it doesn't, I guess it hurts your brain or something. Like if somebody corrects you like, let's say, you can't recall it yourself, you like lose the ability to like your recollection. Oh my God, your ability to recall like you lost some of it. Oh, it's like an exercise or something yeah, wow. Yeah, I mean listen, this is what I was told.
Speaker 1Is it kind of like when, like someone knows you're about to sneeze and they say bless you before you sneeze, and then it stops the sneeze from coming? Yeah, and you're like ugh yeah, but your body still wants to sneeze.
Speaker 2Your face hurts. Yeah, you're like, I hate everything about you.
Speaker 1You're not welcome to my house anymore.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's like that. It's deep in the mind. You're like ugh. But anyway, you stole my thunder. I was supposed to remember that fact. They came out with uh 28 years later. I believe is the name of the new movie yeah, but is it going to be good? I mean, it's about zombies, right and like the blood well, I mean, there's been some good zombie like the germs or whatever the virus.
Speaker 1Some great zombie movies and there's been some shit zombie movies.
Speaker 2So I don't remember how the last one ended. The 28 days, yeah, um, I know some like guy was sitting in like a crow like was eating some shit and the blood went in the dude's eye and he's like he became like the zombie shit oh yeah, I remember that.
Speaker 1My favorite part about that, I have to say, was the gentleman that went and collected all the shopping carts what? Yeah, I remember that oh, it was in the um skyscraper. It was towards the beginning of the movie. I'll check it out. So he went to the skyscraper and this guy decided to go around and grab all the shopping carts and he filled up the hallway in the stairwell with shopping carts and it stopped the zombies from climbing to get through? Yeah, because that's a very complicated climb to get through. It's very like yeah fucking all bent up chart.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, exactly. So when I saw that I was like, wow, that was, that's very impressive. Like I'm taking notes. Yeah, exactly, yeah, all right I still don't think I would ever bottle myself up inside of a apartment building. Yeah, I don't think that would be smart business. I mean, in a zombie apocalypse Camp out on the roof, we all have our different. No, no way, man. I think that's. I think you're stinking yourself on an island to die.
Street Takeovers and Urban Thrill-Seeking
Speaker 2Well, if they're zombies, they'll be trying to climb up, and if you do the wagon thing, it won't be so bad. Bad. Or if you put some other kind of traps, maybe not so bad, but assuming that they did make it to the roof my dude, have you ever been you? Might have a better chance to just like you know, fighting them a little bit and like pushing them off the roof I'm not just worried about zombies, man.
Speaker 1You got to think about the full aspect of everything well, you do have people, but then at the same time, right there where you put yourself. Yeah, my first problem would be the tar roof I'm standing on, depending on what time of year.
Speaker 2Worry about cooking. Yeah, it could be 110 degrees up on that roof. I don't have to worry about that.
Speaker 1I'm going to be dehydrated and dying on the roof all by myself. And I don't get the ability to pop up and start running around eating people. I mean, you know, I'm just going to be a crisp corpse on top of a building that got dehydrated. So you got to think about like, where are you going to be strategically? I think for me personally yeah it'd be fleet of boat style.
Speaker 1I would go around and collect an armada of boats and like that's, that's how I think we'd travel is by boat, because ports have a lot of things in them and they're easily accessible and you can get a majority of your things from robbing ports and not robbing, but, you know, accumulating because nobody's living on the planet anymore, so it's not like you're actually taking your facility, but going around to the different port sections and going through the different boxes and stuff. I think you would stay alive for, for and actually live pretty well by collecting things that are coming and going out of a country, um, for, for a good while, because that most people think about going to stores and stuff like that. Uh, you know, stop it as it comes in and as long as you guys have a nice structured way of addressing, uh, going into these different sections, you guys can make sure that your flanks are and everything's well protected.
Speaker 1As you're going in, you're accumulating all your equipment yeah, and then, once you get it, you get back out on the boats. You get a large enough boat, you keep acquiring bigger boats until the point where you have enough people that you've saved and accumulated. And then you have a nice little fleet, including a couple cruise lines, and then, yeah, you get floating cities. Fuck it. You know what? Let the zombies have the land.
Speaker 2So there's a video game out there. It's for the PC, it's called Armor, I think it's for the pc. It's called armor. I think it's like armor 2 or armor 3. Okay they came out with a years ago. They made like a daisy mod and you could play. It was zombies, essentially. Okay, daisy, you know yeah, I know, daisy and, uh, you want.
Speaker 2You played as a survivor and it was based on real time and, like your character, was your character for the world. So, like you entered the world, you had to find a place to stay, you had to forage and find things and then, like you could talk, there was other people in the game. You had to watch out for other people in the game because they want to kill you and take your stuff, yeah.
Speaker 2But yeah, and it was based on the game didn't have like a safe point Like you would. You'd have to like sleep or hide somewhere and the next day you were still in that place. And every day you progress, you try to progress and survive. It's pretty sick.
Speaker 1I've played a couple of those games. They are, but once again those things give me anxiety.
Speaker 2Yeah, give me anxiety. Yeah, I'm telling you like sleeping. You know you wake up in the morning like damn, I wonder if my guy died. Yeah, somebody come hunt me in the night, or maybe a zombie, you know well, here we go, you turn it on. It's like you died. Fuck, yeah, like what the fuck? Who killed?
Speaker 1me, you don't even know you have no idea like right before you went to sleep under that bush, you got like the most cool, like helmet or something. You're like sleep under that bush, you got like the most cool, like helmet or something. You're like accumulated something awesome and you're like I can't wait to get back on there and like use this item. Come to find out.
Speaker 2Somebody came by and like snuffed you out while you were sleeping what was cool about arma was that it was based on uh the time zone that the server you were logged in on. So if you logged in on a server that was in the, you know uh, eastern standard time, it would be the same, you know. So when it's daylight, real daylight, it's daylight in the game, and when it's nighttime.
Speaker 1It's nighttime in the game that's what you meant by that. See, I thought when you you, I thought you said armor was based on like time and so, like, if you're in the japanese time period of one o'clock, then you like, get a kimono and you get like you thought it was like, yeah, that'd be era like yeah, exactly like 1920s zombies. What would it be like get six shooters and like get to walk around like wild bill? That's awesome, I dig that. Yeah, yeah, somebody make that for me.
Speaker 2Yeah, we want to have an era, we want to visit a certain time period like 1950s. That's been done, probably right yeah no, no.
Speaker 1We need different eras. We need to take this back. We need Jesus zombies. Okay, I want to be Paul at the Last Supper and then pick up like something at the last supper to fight off the zombie horde that's coming through the garden of yosemite. Okay, that's what I want, yeah, yeah, okay, I want to go back to the greek mythology of like the battle of troy and like, as the battle of troy and the two armies are coming and he's coming up to the wall all of a sudden, just like a weird zombie, like pops out and just starts eating the whore, like eating one person and the whore just keeps going throughout the entire like the entire field and just yeah.
Speaker 1Bring me like, bring me to like amazing historical locations, and then add a zombie hoard. Yeah, zombies. The middle of Rome, awesome gladiator event about to happen. All the kings and queens are moving in to see this giant event, yeah, and then all of a sudden, like a zombie horde breaks out in the middle of, like ancient.
Speaker 2Rome. You know what's funny? There's guys out there who do that stuff and I've seen it online already where I don't know why it was Harry Potter versus Kermit the Frog, my money's on. Kermit all day. Yeah, but it was like an army of Kermit the Frogs. Oh, like a million something Kermit the Frogs versus like six Harry Potters.
Speaker 1Who won?
Speaker 2Kermit the Frog. Kermit the Frog versus like six Harry Potters.
Speaker 1Who won Kermit the Frog the fuck he did.
Speaker 2Yes, he did. I mean, they battled pretty good. You know, there was like bodies, there was so many dead bodies of Kermit the Frog, there was a mountain and they were fighting on the mountain of dead bodies of Kermit the Frog still, which is pretty crazy. But yeah, it makes you wonder like, uh, well, anybody could build, you know games. Now, you know, you just download the engine and well, that's a tutorial, and that's it.
Speaker 1I'm in that's like how many, how many? What was it? How many 12 year olds do you think you could beat up if I was to send you into a room and like, let's, let's say hypothetically speaking legit 12 year old legit 12 year olds. If I was to send you into a room and be like, you have to be able to knock out this many 12-year-olds, otherwise you lose Right. How many 12-year-olds do you think you could actually legitimately fight and knock out before the horde overrides you and just completely swarms you?
Speaker 2Well, so in this sense, we're talking about Kermit the Frog, who is of certain stature. Yes, and the entirety of the army of Kermit the Frog are the same. So the question is will these 12-year-olds all be the same stature?
Speaker 1Roughly Roughly. We're going to make sure that they stay Roughly Roughly.
Speaker 2We're going to make sure that they stay Roughly.
Speaker 1Yeah, we're going to make sure they stay within like a 20-pound, so they're like 100 pounds, maybe, maybe, maybe, how? Many they're scraping. That depends on you. That depends on your number. You have to be the one to like. Set that bar.
Speaker 2Yeah. You have to be like I I think no weapons, just hands. Um, if it's like no weapons and hands, and well, what are we talking about?
Speaker 1like 100 kit, I mean that's okay, you can't bring weapons with you. You can't bring like tonkas or something like that, yeah, to knock these kids out right.
Speaker 2How many kids though we started with?
Speaker 1I mean, oh, you mean in the pit at the same time. Yeah, you mean like all at once we're coming up with like these hypotheticals.
Speaker 2I mean, you know, we got to at least set the bar.
Speaker 1We'll do it. Set the stage. We'll do it Royal Rumble style.
Speaker 2okay, oh they're going to be coming in.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2We're going to be setting them in like every two minutes. We'll set a new one in. Oh man, I think I'd get gas pretty early.
Speaker 1But if we were doing Royal Rumble style, I don't know man, Maybe 20. And then I'll be fucking tired after that.
Speaker 2You have to knock them out. Oh, knock them out.
Speaker 1Yeah, knock them out. You can't just punch them in the face and be like, oh, I got a couple tags in on that kid.
Speaker 2I mean, I don't know how the chin is on these children we're talking about. Talking about, you know, getting a little crazy right now. First of all, I never want to attack any child, oh this is hypothetical.
Speaker 1I said that in the beginning, hypothetically speaking. Yeah, no children were harmed in the making of this show.
Speaker 2No, I mean you. You know if you had to fend it off, you know you had to do what you had to do.
Speaker 1I mean oh no, you can do either style. You can do a defend off if you want to like back into a corner feel better about it. Yeah, make sure that they swing first before you swing. Okay, it was funny if that makes you feel good or you can go to like total conan barbarian style. But as far as weapons are concerned, I think like we're going to put it in a average like area, we're not going to put in a written boxing ring yeah and you can use like the elements of the room.
Speaker 1Okay, so like, if there's a television in the room, if you want to smack a child with television, you have the ability to okay, if you want to like, take a dresser and tip it over on them.
Speaker 2You got that ability I mean so well, what I can say is I recently saw a video of a 16-year-old kid knocked the crap out of a guy that was like 40. So we can just tell you right off the bat. I can tell you the age don't matter, size doesn't necessarily matter either, and the reason why I know that is because the kid wasn't that. First of all, the kid was way more agile than the older guy.
Speaker 1I put these little guys at 12, okay, they don't have testosterone running through them. They haven't really built up anything.
Speaker 2They haven't started that yet. Right, exactly, yeah, I mean.
Speaker 1They're just big enough to, like you know, put their head at your like normal arm-swinging range.
Speaker 2Yeah, but the problem is once you get.
Zombie Movies and Apocalypse Plans
Speaker 1I think that once you get more than five of them, you're gonna have a tough time if they're all working together, because because I mean okay- so now my question is where are you gonna find three 12 year olds that are gonna get along enough that they're gonna actually make it like what you're just?
Speaker 2like. So you just talk about, hypothetically speaking, about some kids hanging out in a room and you just walk in like what's up, you just like, and then some of them are like don't touch me, you just beat their ass.
Speaker 1Like what are you?
Speaker 2talking about. I don't want no part of this and he's like trying to run out. You're like, come here to.
Speaker 1It's KO time.
Speaker 2You're going to sleep. What the hell? You got some crazy imagination.
Speaker 1I got to say I'm not the first person to bring that up. Okay, so that question is oh, okay.
Speaker 2Yeah, that question is this is next, right? This question is rolling around on the internet. Who brought it up?
Speaker 1I forgot the first person. Oh yeah, in fact I probably don't know the first person, but I know I've seen the question roll around on the internet quite a few times, so I decided to throw it in your direction and see how you felt about it.
Speaker 2I have no desire to hurt children or be in a fight with them, All right what if they were grown men that were the size of 12-year-olds? If that makes you feel better about this situation, Now I don't want to hurt on the dwarf population, little people, whatever you call them.
Speaker 1You don't want to hurt on them like Snow White did. Oh, that's messed up Seven careers down the drain. No man.
Speaker 2No, I say that with a big heart, Honestly, a lot of times I say it I do, I say things that are just I say them because a big heart Honestly a lot of times I say it.
Speaker 1I do I say things that are just like. I say them because they're raw and funny. To be honest with you. No, that's fucked up. What they did, like Disney did. I mean they took like seven awesome careers plus seven backup actors plus stuntmen, so you're talking like 15, 20 little people that could have had awesome jobs. What?
Speaker 2Little people. Are fish appraised things? Oh dwarves, I don't think they like dwarves either.
Speaker 1It's in the fucking name of the movie, bro. What am I supposed to do with that? Okay?
Speaker 2Snow White and the seven small people.
Speaker 1Yeah, fuck that. They're dwarves, and you say it to make it sound even like more more viking say with an english accent dwarves the dwarven kind. Yeah, so all right um yeah, but like honestly, that was like several amazing careers that were thrown into the trash because they didn't even know what to help the hell to do with their movie no first they made like snow white and the seven weird magical things and then, like the public was like yeah, we're not accepting anything to do with that.
Speaker 1And they're like, oh no, oh, we didn't mean seven magical people, we meant seven dwarves originally like like we had the original movie and then they went off and made these weird ai abominations so are you telling me there was an actual cast before the ai stuff? Uh no, it was first ai stuff and then turned into second ai stuff. So first of all, oh okay there was seven magical creatures that weren't dwarves, nor were male. So let me ask you a question yes, the guys who voiced them.
Speaker 2yes, were they dwarves? No, they were not dwarves. No, they were not dwarves as well, right. Well, if I was part of the dwarf union, I would be fucking suing the pants office.
Speaker 1Oh me too. I mean, I'm an uproar.
Speaker 2How dare you not include us in your movie? I wish I was short enough to be involved. I'd get out there and protest, but I doesn't.
Speaker 1It doesn't have the same punch when you're six foot two yeah you know right, it'd be much more of like an impact if I was I don't know three foot two three foot two yeah, then I'd be coming in with that dwarfism badassness doing that mini me. Yeah, no, no, dude, no, not, not mini me at all. No, I come, come in straight up like one of the dudes from Lord of the Rings, yeah, yeah, with the big badass battle axe on my back and the whole nine singing Misty Mountains.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1Yeah, you know.
Speaker 2I'd be bringing in.
Speaker 1Yeah, oh, real different. Like no, I'll be coming in with a statement Tough, of course, what do you want me to be part of the Lollipop Guild? Of course, what do you want me to be part of the lollipop guild? Fuck, a bunch of that noise, yeah.
Speaker 2I want you to be the lollipop kids. We would like to welcome you.
Speaker 1No, hell. No, I wouldn't be the, I couldn't go that Well, I mean it really, I guess, comes down to the body you're given as a dwarf. Do you look more like a lollipop kid Do?
Speaker 2you look more like a. I think I would just say, yeah, first of all, lollipop kids man, crazy looking hair and shit. But munchkins, yeah, in munchkin land. Right, they weren't pissed about that.
Speaker 1That was the 50s bro.
Speaker 2They were actually happy.
Speaker 1That was one of the most high paying jobs of the time for actors.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, jobs at the time for actors? Yeah, yeah, dangerous, dangerous too. They didn't give a fuck. If you got like poisoning cancer, dot whatever, hung yourself in a tree in the background, they didn't give a fuck they didn't know man, it wasn't like they knew they, they would just be like yo.
Speaker 1We got this cool paint.
Speaker 2It looks like metal we're gonna slap over your body.
Speaker 1Jim, you look like you're dying bro it's like why are you throwing up buddy? Exactly spray this guy with oil are you are you sure you got all the paint off. He looks pretty red.
Speaker 1Yeah, oh man that's crazy, dude, it's crazy oh yeah, with that aluminum paint was god awful. That freaking lion suit made the dude sweat to death. Yeah, like there was a lot of like horrific things. And that's not the only movie like that was just like hollywood as a whole. You want to be on the big screen. You're gonna get hurt, boy.
Speaker 2Yeah, oh man I saw something recently about the fucking uh, the wizard of oz. I forgot what it was, though oh, another thing.
Speaker 1Yeah, I gotta say, man, like, when it comes down to that movie, there's so much shit that's wrapped around it and so many things that people look for. I mean, between the gay things and between the pink floyd things and between the dude hanging himself in the background and all the other craziness that went on for that movie. Honestly, I think it's one of the best movies for the hype. You know what I mean. There's just so much stuff that people have made up over the years because, honestly, that's one of the oldest movies and everybody's seen him because it's a children's movie. Yeah, and I I'll be straight up honest with you, dude, that shit scared the shit out of me as a child.
Speaker 2Yeah. Yeah, I know some kids that were scared of the monkeys.
Speaker 1No, I didn't mind the monkeys Flying monkeys. I didn't like the imagery.
Speaker 2What are you? What like Dorothy I mean 95% of it is Dorothy in the beginning.
Speaker 1Then you see the weird fucking bubble witch. No, as soon as it went into dollar tree store coloring.
Speaker 2That's when I was just like oh, with the green and the yellow I didn't like the. I didn't like the imagery I want to go back to the black and white, please exactly, please, color.
Speaker 1Can we go back to like a decent movie where, like, the imagery looked fine? I understand you were trying to sell colored televisions like hardcore back in the day, yeah, but I don't want to be I, I and I was born much further in the future than that, but I don't want to be involved in that like I understand what it was and now it's like I don't. The gay society yeah.
Speaker 2But once again.
Speaker 1I don't want to be wrapped in that. I don't want to watch that. That's not for me. There's a lot of things that are for me and they're really fucked up, most of them. They're really fucked up. Oh yeah, dude, I really enjoy weird off the off the wall, not ordinary things. Yeah, I do appreciate that. I love obscure humor.
Speaker 2I mean, yeah, I like all kinds of young men Don't matter to me. I mean I don't get crazy about it.
Speaker 1Oh, I hate dad jokes. Man, you don't like the dad jokes? No, I can't. I can never let them come from my lips. Really yeah it's just not in me. I'm like, yeah, I just don't like it, like what?
Speaker 2Let's hear one of them dad jokes that Doug has.
Speaker 1I hate puns Like oh, why can't you hear a pterodactyl? Go to the bathroom.
Speaker 2I don't know why.
Speaker 1Because the P is silent. Okay, oh yeah, that's a dad joke. That's a dad joke. Yeah, yeah, it's a dad joke. That's a dad joke. Yeah, yeah, it's a spelling joke. You know, it's like one of those things that you're like I guess it's funny. I mean, if I really have to think about it, yeah, I guess I appreciate that in some kind of weird, obscure way yeah, yeah, all right.
Speaker 2So, um, yeah, man, I don't know. Oh yeah, you're right. Right, there's, like you know, why don't skeletons fight each other?
Speaker 1but they don't have the guts yeah yeah, right, right.
Speaker 2I told my wife she should. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug dude, stop please.
Speaker 1I fucking hate these things. These are brutal. Why don't?
Speaker 2eggs. Chill jokes Because they might crack up Shut up Swear to God dude. I fucking despise this, Although I got five going, so I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I'll let you know which one comes first.
Speaker 1On this note, I'm going to let you run your jokes.
Movies, Comedy, and Dad Jokes
Speaker 2The last one is what did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt, I don't get that one. Oh, I guess, because it's a zero with a twist in it to make it an eight. Yeah, that must be what it is. Yeah, dad jokes, they are pretty terrible, I wouldn't mess with them. I'm not going to mess with them what it is. Yeah, dad jokes, they are pretty terrible, I wouldn't mess with them. I'm not going to mess with them. Let's see, hold on a second here. Let me see if I can run us some stuff. Bleh, okay, nah, there's nothing good here. This is all ridiculous. I like to welcome you. Yeah, man, you left me hanging here by myself here.
Speaker 1Sorry, you lit it up with those whole dad joke things. I decided to use that as a good time to go take a piss. I'm just holding it. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, I had to step out for a second while he went on that piss. I'm just holding it. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, I had to step out for a second while he went on that rant. That's not my jam. Yeah, man, yeah, I had to go on the rant. I like the like I said obscure, weird, out of the ordinary, honestly Terrible I know I am. I am very bad, nothing makes me. I'll be watching a movie and the most obscure, like punch to the face, happens and I burst out laughing in the most serious of the movies. And just because I mean honestly, if you were in that situation and you saw that happen and you were standing out in front of a bar, that'd be funny. Or if you're standing out in front of a coffee shop, one dude just like punches the other dude in the mouth, like oh that that's hilarious.
Speaker 1At least I feel so, yeah but you like the slapstick slapstick no, no, no, no, no, it's not. I don't like slapstick. For slapstick it has to be like a serious thing for me to be like oh, that's fun, that's obscure, that's weird, yeah.
Speaker 2That's obscure.
Speaker 1That's weird, yeah yeah, not not like an intentional like um, oh, who are those guys back in the day, the three stooges? No, I despise that. Nah, they weren't my. I wasn't a fan of that either, but I like marks on the marks brothers in my jam. You know, no, um, you don't remember the gentleman with the big mustache and big eyebrows with the cigar. Oh yeah, that's Groucho.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1Yeah, that was a big one. A lot of people like would use him in their comedy skits.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, Even Bugs Bunny did that. Of course he did. I mean, Groucho is a fucking legend. Yeah, Horse Feathers the whole nine Guys. I really know my shit when it comes down to this, so I don't want to say anything in the comments. He's not really a Marks fan, Shit. I know my shit.
Speaker 1He dreams about him a nut. Honestly, chico, the most Harpo was your major slapstick kind of comedy guy, charlie Chaplin. Each brother had their own aspect of what they did for their comedy team and brought together this full aspect of different comedies all wrapped into one movie which was brilliant, and you never see that kind of shit again. And unfortunately they only had a budget that was so big to be able to produce the movies that they did. If they had the budgets of today, with their comedy of yesteryear dude, oh my God, those things would be priceless.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, they'd be epic. Epic yeah, man I hear that, but it's the things I hold on to. It's the little things.
Speaker 2Yeah, hold on to those little things, doug.
Speaker 1Exactly.
Speaker 2We hold on to a little thing every night. We know that. Every half hour or so when you get a piss. You're holding on to a little thing.
Speaker 1Wow, bro, you and Angelo Always talking about my dick. Hey man, I wish it was as small as you guys said it was.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, dribbling on your balls.
Speaker 1I wouldn't have to buy an extra seat when I flew on planes? Yeah, right.
Speaker 2I have to get the extra space, guys. It's not fun. Exactly, I got to pay more. You know what it's like I can't cross my legs.
Speaker 1I cannot cross my legs.
Speaker 2Yeah, I am incapable of doing those things. Oh man, you know what's crazy? Man, I can hear that thing.
Speaker 1The buzz, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2Sucking it yeah, getting your puff on your fruity puff, honestly yeah, it is what it is.
Speaker 1Yeah, I am a creature of my crutches and I know this. Okay, and I've comfortably got well, I become comfortable with those skeletons in my closet. Yeah, yeah, I've accepted who I am. Exactly. What could change me? Oh, what's the serenity prayer? God, give me the strength to accept me for who I am.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah, I don't know. I better remember it. I didn't do AA though.
Speaker 1That was good enough for me. It worked.
Speaker 2The audience got it.
Speaker 1They understood what I was talking about. Yeah, he did that one guy. We appreciate you, man. This one goes out to you. This Michelob, michelob, ultraob Ocho. Yeah, man, strangers in the night.
Speaker 2It's a superior light beer Only 95 calories.
Speaker 1Yeah, you know what? Do you see the oil show? No, landman, no, oh, landman, landman, Nope, oh, that is a show, is it? It's a really good one. Nope, oh, that is a show, is it? It's a really good one. You got to watch that one. I don't know what is it on. It is on Peacock. Oh, don't have that. Oh shit, too many subscriptions, can't have that one.
Speaker 2Actually I might be able to get that one, though I think actually I do have that one.
Speaker 1Oh, do have that one oh it's definitely worth it.
Speaker 2I think I got that over somebody else. It's one of those things you know. No, he pays full price for it. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, full price. Hey, man, listen, you know it's crazy, right? So, like netflix, all these things, you know people shared them, they know that it's happening, and then they, like you know, they threaten and be like, ah, we're gonna stop it. And I have to say, out of everybody, I think the only one that really did was Netflix. They actually shut that shit down. No, they didn't. If you want to share it and it's not a family plan, yeah, when you're in the same household, it's a little different. No, no.
Speaker 1They started charging for extra accounts. They're like oh, we see that another account's on your like watching this, and you've reached your max viewing account. So if you want to expand your viewing account, you must pay this amount. Yeah, right, right. So it's not that they got rid of your subscription, they're just demanding you pay for what you're using.
Speaker 2No, no, they don't cancel you, but yeah, exactly Like you and your four buddies want to watch Netflix.
Speaker 1Not a problem, we're just going to roll that into your monthly sum.
Speaker 2Yeah, exactly, and it's crazy too. So, like Disney, oh no, not Disney, maybe it is Disney. Well, actually, maybe even Amazon. So Amazon advertises shows or whatever. And I think now Amazon does a thing with paramount and then paramount has a has a showtime under it, so like, if you want to watch showtime, you need a subscription to showtime, but you also need a subscription to paramount. Yes, what the hell. And then if you it's like what you know, and I think amazon's thing was just like we're gonna advertise with them or whatever. But yeah, it was kind of crazy, man.
Speaker 1Well, it actually comes down to the fact that you can either buy or use your subscription. So they're like yeah, we got this thing and if you don't have the subscription, you can go ahead and buy it from us over here, right, but if you do have the subscription, we'll go ahead and pop you over your application that you do have it on and you can go ahead and watch it from there, yeah, since you're already paying your monthly fees for that.
Speaker 2It's funny. I used to have cable and I think I had basic fucking cable. I didn't even have HBO or any of that shit and I was paying in 2006, with Token $130 a month. Oh yeah, and I got internet. So I'm like wondering, like now you know I pay for Sling, that's 60 bucks. I pay for Netflix, that's another like $15.99. So that's like $16 or whatever, $17 with tax or whatever. Yeah, uh, then you know you got HBO Max. Then you know you got HBO Max, that's $15.99 and then what's your phone subscription?
Speaker 1my phone Verizon. Call up Verizon, you get one of those guys for free.
Speaker 2You've not been I haven't been in the loop yeah, you gotta haggle with your.
Speaker 1I'm throwing this out to all you guys, every single one of you. Anyone listening to me right now? I haven't been in the loop.
Speaker 2Yeah, you got to haggle with your hey guys.
Speaker 1I'm throwing this out to all you guys, every single one of you, Anyone listening to me right now call up your phone company and tell them to give you whatever freebie they have for the month, because you've been a loyal subscriber for a long time and you're giving out freebies to the new people that came along that are fucking yeah, we're mad as heck and we're not going to take it anymore.
Speaker 1Well, no, I did it all the time. I've done it my entire life. I've always renegotiated my contract with my phone company and I've called them up and I'm like, hey, I see, you have a new commercial right now we're giving away this type of phone. So you're giving away a $1,500 phone to the new guy and I'm over here as a little customer and you ain't giving me shit. So, yeah, and honestly, every time I fucking try to play hardball with him, they're like oh well, sir, please come off the ledge, you don't need to go to our uh, like our competitor. Please stay with us.
Speaker 1We appreciate you here, you can have it too.
Speaker 2You know what's crazy, what's up? So talking about cell phones, stuff like that. So I got two lines with Verizon and I was on some plan that they don't have them anymore, so they just continue to plan. It was a pretty good plan. I liked it because I got the hotspot for free, unlimited everything. It was $60 a line back in the day I kept it and I held on to that shit.
Speaker 2But yo, they out of nowhere. My phone like stops working. Right, try to make a call, nothing. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Happened on the same exact weird shit Happened on both lines. I call up Verizon. I'm like, yo, what's going on, man, the fucking phone stopped working. Oh, I don't see anything wrong here. Oh, sir, you're being de-authorized. I'm like what? Yeah, you're being uh, deprioritized. I'm like I'm not prioritized. What are you talking about? He's like oh well, if you pay more on this plan, then you have a better priority. So like we won't knock off your phone call. So I'm like, are you kidding me? Like, no, in high congestion areas, the bills that the people who are paying more have for the higher ultra wide band or whatever get priority over the ones who don't. And I'm like, oh, wow, that's crazy.
Speaker 1Anyway, I had to talk to her for a few minutes. Where are you located right now? I would like to go and talk to you about this face-to-face you bring out the urge that we need to have an immediate discussion.
Speaker 2But after speaking to him for like a few minutes or whatever, it came out that they squeezed me for $2 a month and I'm like, alright, and then I got everything. I upgraded the plan, I was able to get prioritized, all the problems on my phone went away.
Speaker 1Wait, they squeezed you for $2? $2. $2 a month, yeah.
Speaker 2After everything, taxes, fees, all that it was only $2 because the plan that I had $24 a year. Yeah.
Speaker 1Oh man.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1So I was like you know, whatever, I don't care, I'd be so angry, I'd be so angry. Yeah, you made me so hostile and angry over such a situation for $2. And you're a huge company. Why don't you just eat that shit? Yeah, why don't you just eat that shit? Why don't you eat the $24?
Speaker 2You know what I mean.
Speaker 1You might actually make me want to leave your patience.
Speaker 2I guess the moral of the story is that, listen, at some point your plan May become defunct. It's old. You used to be able to grandfather it. You used to be able to just keep it forever and it would work great. Now they're turning screws on that shit and your phone works like shit.
Speaker 1We'll see here's okay, all right, here we go for 360. We're coming all the way back to the beginning. This is my problem with teslas. Okay, fucking tesla. Wow, if I buy a car, yeah, and it's got a gadget or gizmo in it, yeah, it better fucking work why?
Technology Subscriptions and Tesla Ethics
Speaker 2because I bought that car and that car came with that gizmo gotcha yeah, I mean it came along with it with it.
Speaker 1Yeah, if I, if I buy, like, let's say, a hair trimmer, and it comes with a bunch of gadgets to be able to do different parts of mine, like my beard and whatnot, I want them all to work you know right I don't want to have like three of them sitting on the shelf and be like, oh, you have to pay extra to get that right.
Speaker 2So what's with the tesla? What do you with your beef?
Speaker 1so with tesla yeah, you buy the car. The car comes to your house yes, it does and you can turn on and off functions. You can turn on and off the heated seat. You can be like, oh, I'll pay more to have a heated seat, yes, and they'll go. Oh, okay, we just turned your heater seats on, you can enjoy those now. Yeah it's like no wait. So that means there was heated seats in my car right when I bought the fucker right, yeah there's all they were turned off right all these gadgets, yeah, you buy, are already in the fucking car.
Speaker 1So you're not. When you purchase that car, you're not purchasing it for like the value it's max value. You're purchasing it for whatever the car is, to basically rent past that point.
Speaker 2You know what's crazy about tesla, what's up?
Speaker 2so I get your point and yes, I had a friend who bought a tesla and it was like that. And he they there was this whole thing. You know, if you tweet at, you know at, and it was like that and there was this whole thing. If you tweet at at the time, it was Twitter. If you tweet on Elon Musk, hey, what's going on with the car? Everybody should get free audio, whatever. And then he would do it. He would do weird things. Oh, yeah, we'll turn the audio on. And then all of a sudden, everybody who bought the Model 3 had the premium sound or something like that. Um, so yeah, those are like software features so they could turn them on and turn them off, and all the cars are all built the same. And I was like, yeah, it made it easier for them to sell cars with different ranges, to just turn them on and turn them off based upon the software updates you want so I mean it's like a flat rate cost for the car.
Speaker 2It doesn't mean it's not included, right? So you got a fixed rate on the car, so it made sense for them. Manufacturer wise. It makes sense to me, it's a car for a service you know, but what's crazy is that it's actually not a car, so he got it defined as so. Tesla is not a dealership, tesla does not. Tesla does not fall under like the automotive dealership rules at all.
Speaker 2What, oh wow so like it's almost like you're buying a cell phone, like I'm not even kidding, so like you know how. Like there's this whole Right to Repair Act and all that stuff Doesn't matter nothing about Tesla, at least from what I remember. But yeah, tesla is not really an automotive, so that's why there's no other dealerships that sell Tesla. Only Tesla sells Tesla. For instance, if you have a Kia dealership, they might sell a Hyundai. They might sell Kia, they might sell other cars.
Speaker 1Right, because they're bringing them in. They're bringing in like you can't, but you can't buy.
Speaker 2You can't open up a dealership and be like I'm going to be a Tesla dealership because it doesn't exist. Tesla's not a dealer, that's their thing. And somehow they, they fucking work the rule, work the, the, the laws in such a way that it's like you know, it's like a premium cell phone.
Speaker 1Well, you can't hate the guy for like reading the rules that were already there.
Speaker 2Oh, I'm not mad about it. I'm just like that's amazing. You know that he was able to do that and, um, you know my all means, know they want to control it. But what's crazy is that like, so these cars, after they're done with they, go to Tesla, they go to like auction and then at the auction, you know they sell them for whatever they want at the auction and then after that somebody else gets it. If they have a problem, they can't bring it to a mechanic. If it's like suspension work maybe, but the vast majority of the work that needs to be done is software. So they have to take it back to Tesla. And a lot of times there's times when Tesla's like oh, this car's done. Now, what do you mean? The car's done, yeah, it don't work, you can't have it. They take it away from you, like it's weird, like that. Or they charge. They want exuberance amounts of money in order to cover the car. It's no longer under warranty. You know like they want like the battery. Oh, battery's dead, that's it. Now you gotta buy a whole new, whole new battery. You know when it's like. You know you could really just change like a cell or two.
Speaker 2There's a lot of weird stuff about it. There's guys out there that do like, um, they hack them, you know. And there's guys that like they'll program the car for you. But that's the whole point of like uh, the right to repair act and uh stuff like that is that you know, manufacturers, they shield information from third-party repair. So like, wow, they don't want you to know how to like interface with the car to fix it or any of that stuff. But the Rights to Repair Act for automotive, it's supposed to open those doors and it does to an extent. But even like Ford and like, well, maybe not necessarily Ford, but like other dealers, like GM for instance, you can't. So if you have a GM, you have a global A right which means that all of the components in your car electrically are protected. They call it protected.
Closing Thoughts and Sign-Off
Speaker 2And if let's say, for whatever reason, you door switch, oh fuck, my window won't go down, I need a new switch. You go to the junkyard, you put it in there, don't work. And also you could brick the car, Don't start Really? Yeah, Well, because their excuses a lot of auto theft and people stripping down cars enable the secondary market to sell stolen parts.
Speaker 1No right. Fuck you, you're just stopping all the pick-apart guys from being able to go in.
Speaker 2Nope, it's got to be VIN coded. It has to match the VIN number.
Speaker 1That is some bullshit.
Speaker 2So there's guys out there that they program their job. Recode it, just recode it. Take your VIN, put it on there.
Speaker 1Well, I mean, God bless those guys Vehicle hackers.
Speaker 1Yeah, I mean, hey, you know what it's industry. And yeah, just wait, dude, I was thinking about like talking to uh my dad today about this, because we were going on about like elon musk and being able to get score a medical or a military contract from uh america. And my dad's like, well, why, why would they need uh teslas? That doesn't make any sense. I'm like, well, dad, you gotta think about it. Like elon musk is wrapped into way more than tesla's. He's got his robotics industry up and running. He's also got the spacex. Oh well, not spacex so much. I mean, spacex is what it is, but I mean that's more for exploration than actually needing to be like a military, like great weaponry. No, you never heard, never heard about the Space Force. Oh no, space Force is an American. Yeah, trump did that.
Speaker 2Yeah, Trump did that and SpaceX is helping with that.
Speaker 1And SpaceX's main thing is Starlink.
Speaker 2Do you know what Starlink is? Yeah, that's what I yes, and that's part of SpaceFab.
Speaker 1Yes, starlink's, where the money is, so to be able to go ahead and run satellites over an area and blanket them in an area. Space war, it's land war. It's the fact that all of your guys.
Speaker 2Command and control Right.
Speaker 1All their headphones, all of their walkie talkies, everything are working, working perfectly and they're going to be able to communicate. Well, yeah, on top of that, we have the robots coming out, and then Neurolex.
Speaker 2Neuralink, neuralink yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, that particular company Control computers with my mind. No, control robots with your mind. You could do that too. Right, he's building the robots.
Speaker 2I just want to be the best at Call of Duty. Just look at the screen like world champion.
Speaker 1No, I want to get 700 kills under my belt.
Speaker 2In real life.
Speaker 1As an 80-year-old man in his bed with Neuralink.
Speaker 2Isn't there a movie about that?
Speaker 1My robot's just out there killing for days.
Speaker 2I feel like there's a movie about that, where there's real-life war going on but there's kids that are playing video games. Yes, there is they don't even know or care that it's real war, but they're just playing their video game, killing people.
Speaker 1Just murder. Yeah, yeah, like ah, yeah, but it's real. That's the angle I kind of want to go with yeah, nice, get in the neural link, just sit in my bed, piss myself and just go slaughter.
Speaker 1Speaking of that, let's do that. With that said, ladies and gentlemen, we appreciate you, as always. Thank you for coming. Thanks for hanging out with us on the couches. God bless you. Please like, subscribe and all that other garbage that we need to do to try to rise up, be part of the communities, as everybody else. You know, we appreciate you guys. Keep being conservative and doing your thing and, as always, fuck off.