Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo
Welcome to Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo – the no-holds-barred podcast where we dive into the week’s hottest topics with unfiltered opinions, razor-sharp wit, and a healthy dose of dark humor. Nothing is off-limits as we tackle everything from pop culture and current events to life’s absurdities, all while keeping it raw, real, and ridiculously entertaining.
Grab a drink, sit back, and prepare to laugh, cringe, and maybe even question your life choices – we’re here to talk shit, and we’re not holding back.
Talking Shit with Doug, Ryan, and Angelo
Straight Talk: Navigating Identity, Politics, and Modern Life
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EPISODE 18 – “Pizza, Politics, and Puerto Rico”
Get ready to laugh, cringe, and maybe even learn something (but no promises) as Doug, Ryan, Angelo, and special guest Garrett the Pizza Guy dive headfirst into the world’s hottest topics—with zero filter and zero regard for polite society.
It all starts with a wild tale of a Puerto Rican beach escapade, but quickly spirals into debates about immigration policy, gender identity, and why Uncle Sam can’t stop swiping the national credit card. The guys chop up California’s political glow-up, wonder if tomboys are extinct, and ask the real question: is anyone in D.C. actually doing math?
One minute you’re laughing at a pizza joke, the next you’re questioning your entire worldview. But hey, that’s the magic of four friends talking shit—where the takes are hot, the laughs are hotter, and the debt ceiling is somehow still rising.
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Welcome to Talking Shit
Speaker 1Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Talking Shit. This is your host. Don't Know Shit, Doug, and it's a very special night. Besides Angelo and Ryan, we have your favorite pizza guy, Garrett, in the house tonight. Everybody, what's up. What's up.
Speaker 2Hey. We should have had like applause, come in.
Speaker 3when you said that oh, like the cheers yeah.
Speaker 2Like oh, and we all rejoiced it was a very low budget operation.
Speaker 5Our pause, guy was smoking a cigarette. We'll put that in a post. Edit, bring that one back around.
Speaker 2You guys might appreciate it.
Speaker 1No we won't.
Speaker 2Don't expect much out of our budget. Chances are this episode won't even make it.
Speaker 5I'm still waiting for the last episode I was on. I kind of think Doug's got that in his files, he's just beating it.
Speaker 1I have a Rolodex of things in there. I love how. Garrett says this part no actually we had big things happen here in Talking Shit.
Speaker 5Yo, the studio's looking good. You guys are to paint it, fucking one. And a half walls yeah, it's the only walls you need to see, right exactly we painted some things up.
Speaker 1We're moving things around inside the studio itself and then, as far as, like on production side, we did it like a whole bunch of stuff on back end recently. So you're gonna start seeing a lot of things, but yo I swear to God Angelo, you will not make it through brooding season if you keep up this comment.
Speaker 2I don't believe it. Are you going to fucking drown him?
Speaker 5No no, no, no, Drown him.
Speaker 1Drown him will be lucky. I'm chumming water and we're going shark fishing. Oh shit, oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna like, yeah, how far you got to go out for that? Um, within I think it's like six and a half feet of water, and you should be in like shark area.
Speaker 3Six and a half feet of water.
Speaker 1Yes, six and a half feet of water and you're, and you're definitely in sharks area.
Speaker 5I guess that makes sense, because this is a dude who comes into the shark, uh, to the shop, and he's always talking about how he goes, uh, shore fishing for sharks, yeah, and he'll fucking throw out his line and he catches like not Makos, obviously, fucking like the little guys, like a sand shark, oh yeah.
Speaker 1Sand sharks, lemon sharks, things like that that go into the land and they nestle in on like shallow waters.
Speaker 5Yeah, you catch those all day.
Speaker 3You just throw them back right, little sharks, little sharks, if you think about it when.
Speaker 1If you think about it when I say six feet of water you guys are like oh that's pretty shallow, no six feet of water.
Speaker 5I can't fucking stand.
Speaker 1No, exactly.
Speaker 5You can't stand, angelo, definitely can't stand People don't comfortably go out to six feet of water.
Speaker 1But six feet of water is definitely a good, comfortable place.
Speaker 3It's like just over my head.
Speaker 4You don't want to be there.
Speaker 1That's not a comfortable spot for you to be hanging out and chilling.
Speaker 5Maybe if we're in the Bahamas. I'll go out up to my shoulders If I'm going to go out somewhere-.
Speaker 3To like four feet.
Speaker 5Yeah like four feet? Yeah, exactly, but on fucking Long Island and the fucking hypodermic shores of Jones Beach, fuck no.
Speaker 3Okay, you can't see, okay, you can't see how cold it is no, you can't.
Speaker 5If I can't see my feet, oh the second, I go into the fucking water. I don't want anything to do with that shit because I don't know what's lurking under there. And he's telling me there's sharks. Yo you step on fucking rocks, you step on fucking all these crazy things Fucking horseshoe crab.
Speaker 1I am not saying that to put fear into anybody.
Speaker 5No, but I'm not doing that shit.
Speaker 1I'm in the water constantly, all season long.
Speaker 3He was like I am a fish, I'm not going to say the words he's a gay fish.
Speaker 2You're in Cajun out there fucking swimming around.
Speaker 4I love fish sticks.
Speaker 3I went to Puerto Rico.
Speaker 1Doug, do you like fish sticks?
Speaker 4In my mouth. So you're a gay fish.
Speaker 5So I went to Puerto Rico and we went to Flamingo Island, which is supposed to be like one of the most Sounds heterosexual, that's like the fire island of Puerto Rico, right but the non-gay
Speaker 4part, oh yeah.
Speaker 5It's the straight part.
Speaker 1So we went there. Look how we had to reiterate that.
Speaker 4It's not just a non-gay part, it's definitely a straight part.
Speaker 5It's triple straight. They don't even let the gays in.
Speaker 1They have to check your straight card before they let you in the door.
Speaker 3No rainbow flags. Here we went swimming and stuff no rainbow flags here we went swimming and stuff.
Speaker 5It's beautiful the coral reefs. You got the beautiful fish and everything.
Speaker 1Dude, I tell you All, the straight people.
Speaker 5All the straight people.
Speaker 4You can want All the straight cock. That cock was so straight, no curvature.
Speaker 3No curvature, no J dick hair, that's no.
Speaker 5J-dick here, that's what I meant when I said straight no plastic dicks on this part. But the crazy part is yo, there's some fucking local there and he's got a fucking Big dick. I mean he basically he might as well have had a big dick. He's got a fucking spear gun. Swimming through the ocean with a fucking spear gun at like fucking four feet. Everybody else has got fucking goggles on and looking at the fucking coral reefs and stuff, this guy's shooting little fucking fish on this thing and he's pulling them out of the fucking water, and then the fucking cops come like dude Eating them like sushi.
Speaker 2I don't know what he was trying to do with them.
Speaker 5He just beat him right off the spear Because they're like they're fucking minuscule, they're dead, so you can't put them in a fucking, you know, in his tank, at his house. So the cops come and they're like bro, you can't do this. And they had to like escort him off with this fucking like his little spear gun and shit.
Speaker 4He's like shooting fucking little fish and there's little kids swimming around and around and like this isn't safe.
Speaker 1Oh my God, nino, hold on a second. No, no, no, no, hold on a second, though You've got to take me to this moment. So you were there. In which island?
Speaker 5Flamingo Island.
Speaker 1I think that's what it was called, so you're there on Flamingo Island.
Speaker 5They're on vacation and you're there at, like the resort Doug took a little excursion to this island, okay, and it's supposed to be like a big tourist spot or whatever. And then there's the beach that you go to.
Speaker 2Describe the boat.
Speaker 5I mean, there was like sailors everywhere.
Speaker 3Lots of men.
Speaker 2Tons of seamen.
Speaker 1Were they strapping.
Speaker 5Kind of like the one that crashed into the bridge the other day.
Speaker 3Oh really, they were all standing on the mast. Yeah, we were standing on the mast, a little Spanish guy.
Speaker 4A lot of Spanish guys and stuff.
Speaker 5So yeah, so we took the excursion there and then you know it was meant for people to just go and, like you, have your fucking goggles on and your little snorkel and everything.
Speaker 2Did you have to wear?
Speaker 4the goggles on the boat, so you're out.
Speaker 2It's like COVID.
Speaker 5To avoid all the semen. Yes, so hold on. Everybody's got a lot of semen crossing this river.
Speaker 2Gotta get the snorkel too. Make sure you don't get it in your mouth.
Speaker 4You don't want the semen in your mouth. You don't want the snorkel. You don't want the semen in your mouth, you don't want the snorkel in your mouth.
Speaker 5I think I said something about we're going to Flamingo Island, I think they said put the snorkel in your mouth. It's going to get you ready for what's about to come.
Speaker 1Oh, so the reason that I ask you that and I wanted you to bring me back to this moment. So you're hanging out on this beach and you're sitting there and having a good time on the beach. No, I'm swimming in the water?
Speaker 4Okay Well yeah, but that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1You're on the beach having fun with your friends swimming in the water and you're chilling out and all of a sudden, this dude comes out with a spear gun. He was in the water too. He's not shooting big fish, which are easier to shoot. He's actually popping and killing these little fish.
Speaker 5I mean it's fucking super impressive Right.
Speaker 4That's amazing.
Speaker 5That's super impressive, but it's also fucking dangerous because he's shooting little fish and God forbid he's off a little bit and bang. He fucking shoot one of the fucking tourists.
Speaker 3You're 100% correct to be worried about Don't swim in front of me His.
Speaker 5Rambo, like precision Was pretty impressive, but both things can be true.
Speaker 2They're not mutually exclusive, so were you the only one aroused by that guy.
Speaker 5Or was there other boaters in the water? There was a lot of peacocking going on.
Speaker 1You were just upset, you didn't have a gun.
Speaker 5You were not strapping it didn't have a gun.
Speaker 4Yeah, you were not strapping.
Speaker 1It didn't have to be a spear gun.
Speaker 2I want to play with his spear gun. I need an evil gun on said beach.
Speaker 3Was it the kind of spear gun that, like after you shot it, you had to pull it in with a rope? Or was it like just a, like an arrow?
Speaker 1I don't know, he's like A little ass fish with a big ass rope.
Speaker 3He's just out there ass fish with a big ass rope.
Speaker 2He's just out there crossbowing fish.
Speaker 5I think it was automatic. I think it was automatic, not like Automatic.
Speaker 2Yeah, fucking Gatling gun.
Speaker 3So the spear destroyed the fish he was actually looking for Moby.
Speaker 2Dick.
Speaker 5Yeah, he sprayed that fucking fuse spray and he was like I'll get one of yous A little.
Speaker 2Tommy got in the water huh.
Speaker 3So the locals are the ones who took him in One of the cops.
Speaker 5The cops like fucking escorted him off the beach and shit, really.
Speaker 4Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, they fucking got him.
Speaker 2They took him away like Snicky.
Speaker 5I mean, I don't know what they did with them.
Speaker 2He was like where's the beach.
Speaker 4They probably just let him go. Where's the beach?
Speaker 1What are they going to do with them? They probably know him.
Speaker 4They're like Jim, I told you stop shooting at this beach.
Speaker 1You can't do that here. The tourists hate you when you come over here and start shooting off your little gun.
Speaker 3Kill all the fish. We're not going. I can't even like what's that bohemian name?
Speaker 1There's like 32 beaches the tourists don't know about.
Speaker 3No, it's Puerto Rico. Oh, it's Puerto Rican Puerto Rico.
Speaker 5Wow, jose Jose Jose, what the fuck are you doing?
Speaker 2again.
Speaker 4Fuck man that fucking.
Speaker 2Jose is the autistic kid.
Speaker 4Ah, reyes Reyes, why are?
Speaker 2you shooting up the fishes, juan.
Speaker 4I believe the kids, kids call them acoustic, acoustic.
Speaker 2Playing the acoustic guitar. Why?
Speaker 4can't this kid just go in? The bathroom and count dicks. Why is he going to be out?
Speaker 1here shooting fish Can't be a normal autistic. Hey, you're not a dick counter.
Speaker 3Yeah, and there's this.
Speaker 1Oh yeah, deported, Deported, oh damn.
Speaker 5Love it. Damn. I did not expect that I like it.
Speaker 1Oh, wow. So yeah, let's talk about that Big elephant in the room. Aye, aye, aye, yeah, I mean the situation. The situation is crazy. We're here to talk about situations.
Speaker 5Tell me how you feel about it, Garrett. Tell me how you feel about it. How do I feel about it Before I just lay in with my Stupidity.
Speaker 4So because we don't got, wait do you have illegals With the with the surclaws, yeah, no.
Speaker 1Uh, so here's here's wow, Look at him scramble from that. He just dodged that pizza.
Speaker 5guy was like so in my Ice ice baby.
Speaker 1Let's bring in some other people's employees first.
Speaker 5So, in my opinion, like, whatever it might be unpopular amongst you guys or whatever amongst the listeners or whoever. So when this whole thing was, I guess, brought to the forefront by Trump, it was always about murderers, rapists, drug dealers, the criminals, the bad guys. And he was always saying we're not going to go into the church, we're not going to go into the, and like, all of a sudden it's like if we suspect it, then you might have to worry about it. If you're in the wrong place at the wrong time, you might have to worry about it. You're in the wrong place at the wrong time, you might have to worry about it. And listen, you can say all these things like, oh, they're here illegally, they have to go, that's fine and I get it. Whatever like and that's like on the the broadest surface of the entire spectrum of things. And I'm not one way or the other because honestly, I, I personally think that both sides are fucked up, shit and you can't get the truth at all. Like. You won't get the truth because if you listen to one side, there's fucking war going on in la. If you listen to the other side, it's fucking manufactured. It's crazy.
Speaker 5So, in my opinion, there are probably people that are here illegally, and are they bad people? Are they better people than a lot of people that are American, probably, and are they working hard? Yeah, so should they get deported? I don't think those people should. I think there should be like a fine or a penalty, and then they should have the option where it's like, if you want to stay here, pay to stay. Basically, pay the taxes, pay the taxes, pay the things, make sure you do things, and then you can not like work it off where it's like the cartel, kind of like gracias um, not like the fucking cartel, or like the coyotes, where they're gonna like run people over, you know, like run, like smuggle people across and like you have to pay thousands, of thousands of dollars to get out of the fucking situation, but more like just bring the whole if you can fucking prove that you're, uh, law-abiding, that you're willing to pay the taxes, that you're already paying taxes.
Speaker 1Let me ask you real quick and what's the fucking problem? That's my opinion well, let's break down just that one particular subject that you just said. You said you need to prove you're law-abiding. Now, in our country you are innocent until proven guilty, so you're automatically law-abiding until you're proven to be a criminal.
Speaker 1Now, with what you just, said another part, part of what you said, and I do appreciate what you said and I'm not going to say that hard-working people that came to our country that want to do it the right way, that for some reason haven't been able to find that outlet to do it the right way, haven't been successful. But you also have to look at it like this when I shows up for those criminals that you talked about in that first segment the ones that we do want removed from our streets, when they show up and all of a sudden there's four guys that are exactly on their list that fit that agenda, and then there's 200 other people surrounding him that don't fit the criminal agenda but are illegal immigrants, they can't turn a blind eye. They can't sit there and say, oh no, we don't see these 200 people that are with these six guys that are criminals that are killers, but sometimes that's the outlier and it's not the norm.
Speaker 5You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 1so like, if it's an outlier, then all right, maybe it happens you get caught up in this in the dragnet and I get it but like.
Speaker 1So here's the issue currently is the fact that that that that because I said we, we will not go into these establishments those establishments had felt that they now have the ability and right to go ahead and harvest and protect them like churches and things like that. And now it's like oh, because these churches and you saw it when it came down to trump himself, when he went in for his inauguration, the lady sit there and bad mouth him in the middle of his own inauguration to become president, and that was not her place to say all that bullshit. And that's my own church that got up there to say that and I I was ashamed. I was like shut up, lady, that's not your job. Your job is to just sit there and put him into his place. You are there as a figurehead of a position not to say your opinion. This is supposed to be like yeah, so I know I'm gonna. Mr.
Speaker 3Producer's gonna tell you to shut the fuck up.
Speaker 1I know I'm gonna jabber on a little bit About this one Wrap it up.
Speaker 4Wrap it up. I know I go on my rants we just lost nine listeners. We only had four starting out.
Speaker 2I don't understand. How do we lose more than we get?
Speaker 3Yeah, but no man, I agree with you. I think that, yeah, the criminals they should go after first and, like you know, anybody else who happens to just be there. It's unfortunate for them, but they should prioritize the guys who are bad Now let's look at Mr Newsome, though Okay.
Speaker 1So Mr Newsome, though Okay. So Mr Newsome is on a whole new level of like.
Speaker 2Newsome.
Speaker 1A whole new level of like how do you not know how to do your job? Like you got hired for a position. For what?
Speaker 5That guy hasn't known how to do his job since he's been hired.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, I was looking at it this week. I think that's a political pro quo.
Speaker 4It's like you know what you're doing.
Speaker 1No, you're in, you're in, kid you got it. I mean, just follow my lead, he's abandoned pretty much every service that is supposed to be working underneath of him. The fire department has no idea where to put out fires. The police department is not allowed to do their job because the rioters are allowed to do whatever they want.
Speaker 2They can't kill blacks.
Speaker 3California is rioters are allowed to do whatever they want. They can't kill blacks. California's a shithole man. They want to fucking make it their own country and shit like that To do what with? And you know, they got problems. Problems, oh, they've had problems forever.
Speaker 1But, like, my main thing is it's pretty bad when Mexico's not going to want to invade you.
Speaker 2I was watching this thing where they're going to want to skip over to California and go straight into uh illegal immigrant aids through various programs health care who's that giving them aids? They just had charlie sheen.
Speaker 1Fuck them all and then they spent three3 billion on homeless veteran.
Speaker 2Yeah, and I, like you know, then there was something where, like, they were trying to get like $16 million for like a homeless veterans program and I, like you know, the lady was like you know, it was like a Senate hearing and they're like wait how much on homeless veterans. Like 60. They spent $3 billion total in a year on homeless veterans $3 billion, and then they spent $66 billion total in a year on homeless veterans $3 billion. And then they spent $66 billion on illegal immigrant aid.
Speaker 1Don't you think with $3 billion you could give each homeless veteran a home, and then they wouldn't have homeless veterans? Oh, easily yeah.
Speaker 5That's the problem.
Speaker 2You see, these numbers, they're so fucking inflated, but the majority of it is to it goes to its paying people, it's paying people, it goes to pay people.
Speaker 5It goes to fucking set up a building so that these people could potentially supposedly do their job, so it cost them three billion dollars, but they built a fucking 20 million dollar, fucking state-of-the-art bullshit, ass fucking office for these fucking people.
Speaker 2People sit at, so homeless people can come wait outside and be like can I get aid? And they're like well, we're out of money.
Speaker 5Yeah, we spent all the money.
Speaker 2We're out of money, but come back next year.
Speaker 5So that's the fucking problem. The money doesn't trickle down to the right places.
Speaker 1No, it doesn't, and that's where Doge was supposed to step in, but everybody made a big stink about it because people were losing their fundage when it came down to it Like the. Democratic people were losing their fundage, they were getting all butthurt and then they were trying to fight the fact that I mean Doge came in and I mean I know they wanted a trillion.
Speaker 3Big balls right, big balls, big balls, and they were able to cut I think it was like $167 billion.
Speaker 1Now I know if you're looking at a trillion and you only got $167 billion of savings out of it. Yeah, you didn't hit your mark, but as an average guy like myself and I'm looking at $167 billion I would never see that in 50 of my lifetimes.
Speaker 5No, but you know what's crazy? Because they're saying we got to cut a trillion dollars, which means that there's more than a trillion dollars of probably other waste or other stuff.
Speaker 1So America, here you go. Here's where we're at right now. So America makes or sells $5 billion worth of product a year. We buy.
Speaker 3Can't be right. Yeah, GDP got to be high in a net $5 billion is pretty low. We're like basically Mexico.
Speaker 4I was going to say that too, I was going to say because is it $500 billion?
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 4It's got to be in the trillions.
Speaker 2No, it's not in the trillions.
Speaker 1Our GDP is got to be in the trillions. No, it's not in the trillions, no, no, no, because we're only Our deficit, is it? It's $30.5 trillion.
Speaker 3Oh it's trillion, so it's a trillion.
Speaker 1Millions, it's $5 billion.
Speaker 4It's $5 billion, so we sell $5 trillion worth billion.
Speaker 1So we sell $5 trillion worth of goods, and we are, and we.
Speaker 5No $35 trillion right.
Speaker 3It was $30 trillion as of today.
Speaker 1And we're in $30 trillion.
Speaker 3So it's probably higher than that.
Speaker 1We're in a deficit of $2 trillion a year and that's what they were trying to cut back on. Is that deficit? So that we weren't going to continue the deficit going forward?
Speaker 2Why Elon Musk got so mad about the whole bill is because pre-COVID the deficit was like half a trillion dollars a year or some shit. And then during COVID, everything bumped up because of all the aid and all the bullshit that they were spending the money on Masks, vaccines, ppp programs, fucking small business aid, all the bullshit, right yeah.
Speaker 2So the deficit every year it jumped up to like $2 billion. So Elon Musk was mad because this new bill that they just know it didn't actually cut the deficit back down. You know, like it's still like a trillion something dollar fucking deficit bill and he's like how is all this needed?
Speaker 4How is?
Speaker 2all this needed. If we were at half a trillion dollars before the pandemic, why can't we get to half a trillion dollars now? You know, why are we so over that?
Speaker 1yeah, so right.
Speaker 2So we need to get back to making sure that we're not spending yeah, we're not, way more, we're not spending more than we're making so I think it's this year that we actually our debt balance gets so high that our interest payment is more than we collect in taxes each month.
Speaker 3Well, it's also the money, so we owe all these other countries money.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3And it's at interest rates that are crazy high too, Yep, and then making those payments every month must be like ugh.
Speaker 1And the crazy part is we got put into this trap because of people that can't can't balance their own books if you look at all the if you look at all the politicians that are in office right now, most of them can't get a credit card fucking guy. Most people can't get credit cards no, no, most politicians can't get credit cards why, uh, because they drove their interest rates up too high and they actually like overexpended. So they actually have other people to like use their credit as yeah, no, there's this big thing about it.
Speaker 1Yeah, most of them have over overspent their credit. Most of them have like got dwis, the whole nine it's.
Speaker 3It's insane what they've picked up what's crazy is that a 700 credit score is like higher than 90 of the people who they report on. What's crazy is that a 700 credit score is like higher than 90% of the people who they report on. Yeah, that's crazy, yeah, and then, but you know what it is. It also makes sense. I mean, you guys ever listen to the radio in the morning, if you? You know you hear that guy that comes on and he's like you don't need any credit. God couldn't give you a car.
Speaker 1We will. Good credit, bad credit, no credit. We got you a car.
Speaker 5If you live, you drive $350 a month for 30 months.
Speaker 3That's how the fucking it's like what.
Speaker 5The housing bubble happened. They were giving out fucking mortgages Everybody.
Speaker 2Come on down. No income check, no background check. No money down, no, give a fuck.
Speaker 4You want to buy a fucking $2 million house? Give us an address, sign your name.
Speaker 5We'll give you your fucking money. No paycheck, everybody. Everybody got a house, you get a house, you get a house. You get a Everybody, and then they couldn't sustain.
Speaker 1Yeah, built it South America that decided to bring her dead uncle into the bank to side for a loan.
Speaker 2You know she was fucking him right. Wait when he was dead. Yeah, when she was dead.
Speaker 3Yeah, doing it right there, Listen. I mean there's people that walk in the bank. They got caught. Yeah.
Speaker 2I got one last night off.
Speaker 3Everybody knows that's a rig of mortis dick if I've ever seen one. It never goes soft.
Speaker 2It's ready when I am Fifteen. Last time it was hard like that.
Speaker 4Crazy dude Crazy.
Speaker 5Oh, my god People.
Speaker 2Yeah, that lady was crazy. How do they, how do you I?
Speaker 5guess she's. You just aren't thinking. How do you?
Speaker 1She was thinking on overtime. To be able to pull that off to put the person into your car to drive him down the block.
Speaker 5It's not like fucking Weekend at Bernie's.
Speaker 1That's exactly what it was. That's exactly what it was. That's exactly what it was. I'm going to put this music on.
Speaker 5You're going to sign this document and I'm going to get a fucking loan and stuff, Right, oh?
Speaker 1no, no, he's good, don't worry. Yeah, no, no, I got this. Let me help him sign it. And she put the pen in the videos and stuff. Oh yeah, it's so fucking creepy.
Speaker 3Oh, it was awesome and you know he's dead. He's like hanging sideways.
Speaker 2He's like grabbing his head.
Speaker 1His head's like oh my goodness and and to honestly like look at the bank teller and just be like what are you thinking, buddy? He's like fuck it.
Speaker 3I don't get paid enough for this shit yeah.
Speaker 1Where you want a $20,000? We'll give you a $30,000. Just get the fuck out of here.
Speaker 2It's got to be worth my commission. All right, We'll give you $80,000. Get the fuck out of here. What do you?
Speaker 5plan to do with this money. Honestly, I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 2I'm trying to bring a boat, drive them out of the ocean, throw them in there.
Discussing Gender Identity and Sexuality
Speaker 1I'll tell you what. Borrow mine on the weekend. Take the plane and the ticket and get the fuck off my island.
Speaker 3Shit's fucked up Crazy.
Speaker 1Yeah, this world is filled with weirdos, man.
Speaker 5Weirdos, all right.
Speaker 1What do you got for us, Garrett?
Speaker 5Speaking of weirdos.
Speaker 1Got me a hot thing, bring it to me.
Speaker 5So do you think lesbians like ladyboys?
Speaker 1No, yeah, no no, I don't why.
Speaker 5Why? Why don't you think they like ladyboys?
Speaker 1Because, they want the piece, the bait and tackle is wrong.
Speaker 2It don't matter, that's not what they care about.
Speaker 5If you think about it on the top, that's what they want. They want to be seen as a lady, right.
Speaker 1From the waist up. I'm not going to tell you that right now.
Speaker 5When they're in the bed. They want to get railed out by that fucking by the cock.
Speaker 2By that cock right.
Speaker 3So they want a fucking lady in the streets and a dick in the bed and that's what they get with a lady I will tell you this I want the plastic dick that there's.
Speaker 1I will tell you this as, as I preach today, for and I was witness with my own eyes there are multiple levels to the female bodies there's multiple levels that a lesbian thing, but most lesbians that I know.
Speaker 2this is the reason why they're a lesbian, why they're not claim rubbers. After they get fucked, the girl hangs out and talks with them. Otherwise, when they fuck a dude, the dude's just like you know he's like sleeping playing Xbox, whatever the fuck you know. It's like like, yeah, he's like sleeping playing Xbox, whatever the fuck you know like it's. Like you know it's typical shit. But, like you know, the girl wants to be like cuddled and fucking talk to and tell those bullshit and like wants to call up and have four hour conversations.
Speaker 5But you guys just ain't into that. But do you think a lady boy is still on the level of a regular boy?
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 1He's, you know, like all the other parts. I mean, yeah, so you think he would be like you think he?
Speaker 3would fuck and then fall asleep. Yes, yeah, probably. Well, I guess that's why trans fuck trans or ladyboys, do they yeah? So all right here's my other rule T on T baby Gross when we were.
Speaker 1I Gross when we were Gross. I like how he put that out there. He's like Yo, just for the record, yo.
Speaker 2Whether they play like Fucking, like Transformers, like ones with Decepticon.
Speaker 3On the fucking. I'm gonna spit my beer out. I'm turned toward yeah.
Speaker 2They fucking go at it. But I knew some lesbians. I told you Kobe, optimus Prime.
Speaker 3I told you I'm in disguise, nah, so, like I know lesbians, whatever you know, along the way in life I've met a few, and ones that were couples and everything like that, and there's always the stud.
Speaker 5Oh for sure. Yeah the dude. Yeah the pornos where there's Two fucking smoking hot lesbians, like scissoring and shit that's like fantasy. Yeah, that's. They're paid, that's made I'll take it there's.
Speaker 2There's very few.
Speaker 5They got my fantasy I'm buying a ticket for sure, but um, but in actuality, yeah, like ryan said, like most of them are fucking yeah most of them are fucking.
Speaker 2Yeah, most of them are bull dykes in there. Call me Tony.
Speaker 5There's usually a hottie, like levels of the hottiness, but the one is usually butch and you're like she's definitely doing the fucking and she's definitely getting the fucked. But, here's my question.
Speaker 1Wait, wait, wait. Can you tell that same exact environment in a pegging situation?
Speaker 5You know it's really crazy.
Speaker 1But dude, you say well, yeah, you know who's getting pegged, what's if you saw a dude, like if you saw a chick and a dude and you're just is definitely pegging that dude?
Speaker 5I think that would surprise me. I get the vibe that that dude takes it up the ass by that chick. I think that would surprise you. Who likes to get pegged?
Speaker 1Oh, garrett, is there something you would like to admit to the audience? Not me personally, but I'm just saying I think that would surprise you.
Speaker 2Now's the night to know, I came up with the idea for the sausage roll.
Speaker 1Okay. So now that intrigues me, that you're just like wow, you've never know well, why is it?
Speaker 5why would you never know?
Speaker 1I mean, I don't know why is there a lot of?
Speaker 5people he's like, is that?
Speaker 2why I don't get pegged. What do I have to do?
Speaker 1brown eye that wants anything to go the opposite way. You know like, yeah, but I'm. But I'm just curious about the comment that you made Garrett that you were like oh yeah, nothing surprises you, right? True, I guess in the porn world, the way you said it, like I felt there was like six people in your neighborhood You're like yo, hey you wouldn't, even know, but there's six fucking child molesters in your neighborhood.
Speaker 5You don't know what the fuck's happening, bro, and you can look those guys up and you can look them up. So if you want to go get molested, Mr Fucking Dog, you can go find one. I don't have to shave his beard.
Speaker 2I don't think they want to molest me. I don't think there's a shave.
Speaker 4I think the molesting days are gone.
Speaker 1Shave that shit off man. The exhausting days are gone. Shave that shit off man, I think if I showed up at the door. They're like please don't hurt me. It'd be like well, what was that? How to Catch a Predator? Oh yeah, I knock on their door. I'm like they already caught me. I'm good. I'm good. You know what's crazy.
Speaker 5I'm sorry. The first episode of how to Catch a. Predator was shot in Beth they let you that you had them rented right to borrow for the episode okay. So when we were younger, we always used to know somebody that was like a tomboy, right like a chick, that just like super fucking manly, just dressed like with good, with man yeah, I miss my, I miss my right, which was nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 1They were the cool fucking people, right so now, oh no, I found them hot as shit, like that was like like, is that why that's where?
Speaker 5so you were gay since middle school, yeah so ladyboys are cool with you, yeah I mean from afar, like thailand.
Speaker 1They can be over there in thailand.
Speaker 5I'm totally cool with that you ever see some of those ladyboys in thailand, bro, that you wouldn't know? Yo, I have, if you look, I have corn hub. Yes, I've seen them straight on man, without the side view of the adams apple, you know.
Speaker 1Yeah, you don't see the adams apple, then you don't know no right they pull you off the street see, here's the issue, like when people go to that one mile radius of la right now and they go down there to peaceful protest and then get pegged in the face by a fucking rubber bullet well, they went there, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, okay, just stay
Speaker 5with me protesting. I shot okay, okay, you're like my mom. Everything goes back to fucking politics. We're talking about the fucking Hold on hold on.
Speaker 4It's relevant, it's relevant, it's relevant. Shut up. Let me get back on it okay, calm down.
Speaker 2All right, get back on it like a ladyboy.
Speaker 1So you know what I'm saying, like you go Like a transgender protest.
Speaker 2Go back up on it.
Speaker 1So if you go to Thailand to look around for chicks, most likely you're going to run into ladyboys. It's just like the situation at hand Probably wouldn't go shopping in Thailand, that's what they're known for.
Speaker 5So what you're saying is so how far do you have to go with a ladyboy before you're gay?
Speaker 2Wait.
Speaker 5Like.
Speaker 3Oh yeah, like what, if you like got her. You think the whole time it's a chick.
Speaker 5What if you just titty fuck?
Speaker 2oh, no, no, no, bro, bro, just fuck the girl parts. Huh, but is the? Butthole a girl part, or a boy part.
Speaker 4It's a gray area, that's the gray area, unless you paint it white.
Speaker 1Honestly, honestly pass the social media jive in in the like street way with them where you're like, hey, sexy, I can do it, and then like they get you on camera and you do the whole yada, yadas After that. If you do anything with that lady boy, like taking her to a restaurant First of all, I wouldn't do that whole first part Even taking her to a restaurant.
Speaker 3I wouldn't go down a random alley in Thailand. I wouldn't do the whole first part with a camera and shit, meet me. You do the whole first part bad camera and shit Like yo like meet me at the hotel.
Speaker 2Hey boy fucking, I don't want nobody seeing me Sneaking through the back. How is this?
Speaker 5Wait, here's the keys in the room.
Speaker 2Don't tell nobody what room you're going to. Here's the key.
Speaker 5Shut the fuck up. I'm staying in room 206. I'm going to break into that motherfucker.
Speaker 1You're a man, I can beat you up.
Speaker 5You go through the door, I'll go through the window. But, Doug, why is taking a ladyboy on a fucking date to a bar? Why is that gay? Why is?
Speaker 4that gay Yo how is buying a ladyboy a?
Speaker 1few drinks and playing with his dick. Gay, I don't understand. How is the question not gay?
Speaker 3Well, if you feel him up first, like his chest or her chest whatever.
Speaker 5But you don't grin. That's what I'm saying. You've got to be on the table.
Speaker 1So if I don't grab dick At first, at first.
Speaker 2You're going to get a handful of it later.
Speaker 3We're assuming that you had a few drinks. You're feeling good, you think it's a woman.
Speaker 2And then you're like Damn bro.
Speaker 1So this is like a three course meal.
Speaker 3First I get titties, then I get like. That's a strange labia.
Speaker 2Why do you have a large clitoris?
Speaker 5So maybe that's. Better for the orgasm sweetie has any of you guys ever hooked up with a chick that's got fake tits? Yes, so isn't that half a lady boy? No Kind of.
Speaker 2Kind of why Because?
Speaker 5it's a full woman.
Speaker 2Why? Because her ovaries are on the inside. They both got sex tits. Hold on, no, no, no.
Speaker 1Hold on, there's a big difference between that, because that before she got the tits was 100% a woman Started off that way, right yeah.
Speaker 2You're talking about somebody that was 100% a woman, yeah, but that's not true, though, if you like, cover her face and cover her bottom half, and you just saw her chest, and if you're only, it might look like a young boy.
Speaker 5If you don't know and if you're only titty fucking, I swear to god, you could cover a woman From her, and I will. I will call her a spit.
Speaker 4A little titty fuck spit.
Speaker 5All I have to do is see her legs. I don't see anything wrong with that. All I have to. I can see your legs.
Speaker 1Okay, you can shave the legs, bro. What chest.
Speaker 2Just chest.
Speaker 1Just chest.
Speaker 2That's it, Just chest. I would tell, With no fake titties. You'd be like that's a little boy.
Speaker 1I can tell that's a little boy, I can tell from the chest cavity and the way that the ribs fold in.
Speaker 3What if it was like a skirt pulled up past the nuts? Why? Because they didn't?
Speaker 5Doug's going to be over there counting ribs and shit. I've been fooled before.
Speaker 1If it's just an asshole, if it spreads their butt cheeks, and it's just the asshole could you tell? Just the hole.
Speaker 3What if the taint is not horrible? If the taint's too small, you're not going to know Yo, I once met this guy right.
Speaker 5Trust me.
Speaker 1I really feel like no matter what, no matter what, there's that like inner conscience, like that little grasshopper on your shoulder, that no matter what it's going to be like.
Speaker 3That's right, they call that the Kinsey scale my friend, you're 13 walkies deep. That's a chick, go for it. The scale of gayness.
Speaker 2Who cares?
Speaker 3An asshole's an asshole come in it.
Speaker 2You are so gay.
Speaker 1You won't remember any of this in the morning.
Speaker 3You're like a 9 Out of 10, you're like a 9.
Speaker 1On the scale, on the scale, yep.
Speaker 2My subconscious was just telling me you're going to have to drink a lot more tomorrow to forget this. We're going in. So what did you?
Speaker 5guys talk about yesterday Alcohol, a lot of it.
Speaker 1So what were you saying, garrett? You were about to pull us off on a different swing, so before we went on this one, let's go Okay, so the fucking tomboys right.
Speaker 5Yeah, so tomboys, right. So we all knew tomboys, right. And back in the day, a chick felt like she was a man and she just dressed like a man and there was no problem. It was like all right, she plays basketball and football.
Speaker 2Well, wasn't that she thought she was a man? No, just not Like boys clothes, yeah, I guess, maybe not she thought she was a man, so maybe that was a misspoke she likes sports, whatever.
Speaker 1She liked to go out and hang out with the dudes. She liked to jokes.
Speaker 5So now fast forward to now, right, these women that want to transition to men, right? It makes no fucking sense to me because, alright, they don't have the money to chop their tits off, right? So maybe they take some hormones or whatever, so they kind of go away Duct tape, or they duct tape them down.
Speaker 2I think they should give the tits to like needy men, Wait, wait hold on, put the guys to play with them.
Speaker 1No, no, I just have to reflect on the last situation, because you said that, like Every dude could just pop out with magical fake titties, but for some reason Does it cost more to get your titties chopped off?
Speaker 5I mean, I guess you can get a vasectomy, you can get double vasectomies and stuff, but I don't like Is that cheaper?
Speaker 2I mean, because I think men don't, I guess men can get, I don't know, I guess men can get.
Speaker 5I don't know.
Speaker 1I guess men can get there. Hold on right Pause for one second. This is why Doug doesn't know shit.
Speaker 2So, how's? That roast beef being again.
Speaker 5But that's the thing.
Speaker 2Even if they.
Speaker 4Tighten it up, Doug.
Speaker 2Tighten it up. I feel like I'm throwing Tic Tacs down the whole way, even if they did. Tighten it up, Doc. Tighten it up.
Speaker 5I feel like I'm throwing Tic Tacs down the whole way, so like fucking Ace Ventura, right when he fucking he's like you can get those removed in a week. You can get those added in a week or whatever, but you can't hide, captain Winky, right. So a woman is. It's very expensive for a woman to get a dick grafted right, so most likely they're just gonna settle for just dressing as a man. So why do they have to go through this whole entire thing? Why can't they just be fucking?
Speaker 5tomboys just be a tomboy, and just move on with it. Why do?
Speaker 2you have to go. Well, the other thing with the whole, like you don't have like a sensation, what?
Speaker 1about the opposite of that. If you feel like you're a chick, why don't you just dress like it and why do you have to go through the full operations of putting fake titties in you and the whole that?
Speaker 5You should. That's what you should do.
Speaker 2Yeah, so honestly, well, at this point, If you feel like a chick, just start putting objects inside yourself.
Speaker 3What was that Adam Sandler movie? No, no, it was a girl. He wanted a boy, if you're talking about.
Speaker 1if you're over the age of 18, do whatever the fuck you want to do. You're a grown ass adult Like. Go off and enjoy your life the way you want to enjoy it. But they'll leave kids alone and let them be kids.
Speaker 2Santa Claus, I kind of feel a little different, right, like with the whole trans thing.
Speaker 1Yeah, we know you like the trans.
Speaker 2I mean yo watching training board just means there's more titties. Yeah, I know you love the training. There's dick in all porn, except they're at lesbian hot stuff. But besides that, in training porn there's a dick, but there's fucking extra tits.
Speaker 3I know you like there's also an extra set of dick.
Speaker 5I mean, if you've watched gangbang scenes, there's a lot of dick in that.
Speaker 1There's a lot of dick. You got a dick in the front, dick in the back. There's dick flopping around.
California Politics and Border Issues
Speaker 5Would you rather get the best blowjob You've ever had From a dude or the worst blowjob you've ever had from a dude, or the worst blowjob?
Speaker 2you've ever had from a chick. That's not an option. Are we scraping? Is she scraping teeth? Is she scraping teeth?
Speaker 1Are we?
Speaker 2talking, scraping teeth.
Speaker 5Some people are into teeth, so maybe that's on them, I mean is this, whatever your version of the worst blowjob is.
Speaker 1Is this something where I'm like tied to an electric bed?
Speaker 2in Russia, where, if I don't, answer the question.
Speaker 1I get goulashed.
Speaker 2You don't want to answer it because you know, you want to take it. I'm not afraid to say it, I'll take the dude. How good is he? He's got a deep throat.
Speaker 1He's got no teeth, no gag reflex.
Speaker 4Long enough for me to grab. Three and a half grams of cocaine.
Speaker 2This guy's ready to go. You don't want his jaw moving so much.
Speaker 1Oh, you got a new method, so your preference.
Speaker 3Rakin.
Speaker 2Yeah, you don't want that rakin, the black and dark peck of record. You don't want that.
Speaker 1I need a burr. Yeah, you don't want that, reagan. The Black and Decker Peck record.
Speaker 5You don't want that. I need a burr. Got this man a beer, go get it.
Speaker 3Yo, man, bring the cooler in here Put it right there, right there, can you do that? Are you enclosed in?
Speaker 5here, he's in his favorite position between two men. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3He's stuck between two men, so now on a new episode of Between Two Men.
Speaker 2Yeah, that's next week.
Speaker 4Is that a Between Two Men? We got Doug on the couch tonight.
Speaker 1Between.
Speaker 2Two Men Again. Tonight it's Doug between Ryan and Angelo again.
Speaker 1Smooshed in between the couches. What's?
Speaker 2up boys. Who's taking the bait?
Speaker 1Are you guys ready tonight? Hey, we have Sebastian on the bass.
Speaker 4All right.
Speaker 1So, gamit, are you ready to have a sensational night tonight?
Speaker 2Yeah, we should play like Viagra roulette.
Speaker 1You can shut your mouth.
Speaker 2Viagra and somebody's drink and fucking like you know, Nobody knows who's? Getting Viagra.
Speaker 4Somebody's looking at me.
Speaker 5Yo, did you hear about that guy? He fucking I forgot where he was from. He was put in Viagra and he would go on dates and he was put in Viagra and he would drink fucking drinks to make sure they weren't dudes, really, because he was fucking that's awesome. He was worried about ladyboys and shit.
Speaker 1What does it do to?
Speaker 5chicks Nothing. He was worried that they were going to get a fucking heart on if it was a dude, bro Right.
Speaker 1But I'm asking what does Viagra do to girls?
Speaker 5I don't know. That's the point.
Speaker 1Nothing Well does it, or is there something that's going to fuck with the chemical?
Speaker 3compound that cleans out the heart. It does. It works on the soft tissue of the heart.
Speaker 5That's what.
Speaker 3Viagra was meant for.
Speaker 1Fair enough. I just want to make sure that he didn't just do some life detriment. Could you imagine though?
Speaker 5Because that's what a boner needs. It needs blood flow.
Speaker 1But could you imagine like you're looking for boners but at the same time you're doing life detriment like damage?
Speaker 5to females Say you're in a bar, right.
Speaker 1They die within three years later, because you gave them that pill, because you wanted to check for boners and they're like oh my God, now I don't have a family and I'm dying alone.
Speaker 2Yeah, who cares. Well, that's why it's kids who cares, only ass whores. Whores don't have families.
Speaker 5I'm guessing that's why you got arrested, I mean if you're a ladyboy, right and you got your dick right.
Speaker 1I got my dick. I was a ladyboy. I'm putting myself in the moment Dick with my ladyboy.
Speaker 5Slips the blue pill in your drink, and now you're fucking just hard as a rock Sitting there rocked up.
Speaker 2You're like can we go home, Right? You want a nightcap at my place? No, I'm comfortable.
Speaker 5Try to tuck that shit inside your fucking line and stuff. I got to get rid of this one, you know you try and tuck it up and stuff.
Speaker 2You can't even see a border.
Speaker 1Yeah, so you try to put it up in your like belt, but you're wearing a dress as a lady girl, so you don't have a real belt.
Speaker 5So you don't have a real belt. So, you don't really have a belt line, so it just keeps like yeah, your boner just keeps like stretching this fat neck, you flopping out like you're Michelle Obama.
Speaker 2Oh my God.
Speaker 1Yo Right there on the line.
Speaker 5I don't know if it was a fucking AI fake or whatever, but I was listening to an interview of Brittany Griner or whatever. The fucking basketball dude chick, or whatever.
Speaker 4Yeah, yeah, the one that was in Russia, the one that was in Russia.
Speaker 3Yeah, Bro the marijuana girl Dude.
Speaker 5Yeah, she sounds so manly. And again, I don't know if it was a fucking AI, fucking dub over or whatever but if that's her real voice, dude. It is scary because there's no way. That's a chick. There's no fucking way. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1That's like the boxer. Let's talk about it, let's put it out there.
Speaker 4Ryan, let's talk about it, put it out there, Ryan.
Speaker 3Take my cock up out your mouth and you can talk about it. No more, jake Dixon.
Speaker 4That was an Eminem reference.
Speaker 3Yeah, I saw that one. He was talking about Machine Gun Kelly.
Speaker 1So well, I guess Ryan doesn't want to hit this one, so I will.
Speaker 3When it comes down to it. Oh, you want me to just go for it? Yeah Well, I forgot her name, the Russian fighter Some Olympic bitch who got kicked out or guy, whatever it was.
Speaker 5Yeah, the Algerian chick right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3And then the Indian doctor was like, yeah, that's a man.
Speaker 5But you know, no, no, it just came out recently that she is actually like. They did blood test on her. Yeah, because she had like the extra chromosome or something.
Speaker 1And the whole Democratic Party was like no.
Speaker 5It's not proven. It's not proven.
Speaker 1It's like no, she has a dick Like XX is girls.
Speaker 2It's so fucking crazy because when this whole shit happened, I was like I was reading up on like the whole thing and I couldn't come up with a definitive answer, because, like everything, else Our science department is out on the XXXY, so hit me.
Speaker 5Gary. So I mean, there were so many different things from like like this rare genetic disorder, and it was like x y male, I know, my host. Yeah, um, we're totally fucking up gareth's life but, everywhere you looked, one person was like this is why she's actually a female, and everybody you know. Then there was other people like this is why she's actually a female, and nobody could agree on anything.
Speaker 2Nobody just pulled their pants down like look at her ding dong, that's a Pepe right there.
Speaker 5Anybody see that, pepe.
Speaker 3Now what if it's like one of them, chicks with the big ass, little penis, the?
Speaker 2large clitoris, yeah, yeah, it's just a small penis.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2Hold that shit with a chopstick.
Speaker 5What's the biggest and largest clit you're cool with? I?
Speaker 2don't know, as long as it's smaller than my large clit, do you?
Speaker 3want curtains.
Speaker 4Do we have a large?
Speaker 2clit with interior ovaries or exterior ovaries.
Speaker 3Do you want something you can suck on, or do want something that you know you're just licking?
Speaker 1Angelo's fan mail is going to be filled with small penis men. That means I'm in as long as my dick's smaller than yours.
Speaker 2That's a lot of you out there.
Speaker 4Angelo's hung like a horse, by the way, he's like.
Speaker 1Yo everybody just send him dick mail Spam it.
Speaker 4I don't even care Send it in, spam it all.
Speaker 2Show me those roosters.
Speaker 5He's gonna use some of the good ones.
Speaker 1That's how he wakes up in the morning.
Speaker 5He's gonna use some. I'm gonna brush my teeth watching these.
Speaker 2I'm gonna brush my teeth watching these.
Speaker 3I'm going to brush my teeth watching these Can't wait, so can we talk. I know, hit me the political stuff yeah let's get it, let's go, I just want to go back there for a second.
Speaker 5Let's talk about the Jews. Wait, what Well? We can talk about them next, but right now I just want to talk about this.
Speaker 4We can talk about them next, but right now I just want to talk about this.
Speaker 1I'm going to play this clip, let me think no Kings protests planned across the country on Saturday as well. What are your thoughts on those? What are they going?
Speaker 3No Kings, no Kings.
Speaker 4I don't feel like a King. I have to go through hell to get stuff approved. A King would say I'm not going to get this. A King would have never had the California mandate to even be talking to him. He wouldn't have to call up Mike Johnson and Thune and say fellas, you gotta pull this off.
Speaker 3And after years we gotta Sorry about the gay-ass music.
Speaker 1No, no, we're not a king. Love the music.
Speaker 3Yeah, so like what? Love the guy there's no kings bullshit, there's no kings. Yeah, it's so stupid. Yeah, what king?
Speaker 4How retarded do you think I am?
Speaker 2The thing is the liberal is like, if you're a liberal, if you're a liberal mom, you get to celebrate no kings day two days in a row no kings day, and Juneteenth is coming up. Yeah, juneteenth, another classic no kings day a classic fatherless day.
Speaker 5That's fucked up that's why father's day came before Juneteenth they get their present. You know how I love to drop little. That's why Father's Day came before they get their presents. So you know how.
Speaker 1I love to drop little like fucked up. Yeah, like fucked up historical hints along the way yeah.
Speaker 3And most times You'd be good on what's that history? Drunk history whatever. Drunk history exactly.
Speaker 1That's my little jam right there, oh bullshit. So here's my little pop-up for the week. Okay, Just like gay history, Joe. So here's my little pop-up for the week. Shut the fuck up, okay. You little asshole, Get over there, Okay so.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 1So here's my little snippet for the week. Okay, Snippet. This is what pissed me off. I heard about this what grinds your gears? Yeah?
Speaker 2Yeah, what grinds your gears?
Speaker 1So Nancy Reagan.
Speaker 2Okay, nancy Reagan.
Speaker 1She's the bitch of the week.
Speaker 2Yeah, she had a nice vagina.
Speaker 1Well, I mean, you didn't hate it, but who's that?
Speaker 3like Reagan's wife? Don't know her, never seen her, reagan was Alright.
Speaker 1Let me get into the meat and potatoes.
Speaker 2He knew Reagan Shut the fuck up. Oh yeah, yeah, actually you know what?
Speaker 3I got it. Reagan was Alright. Let me get into the meat and potatoes. He knew Reagan. Oh yeah, yeah, actually, you know what I got it?
Speaker 2Yeah, he got it. Get into the Reagan, Shut the fuck up guys, god damn you.
Speaker 1Alright. So Do you know why California is goddamn Democrat today, Do we?
Speaker 2know why. Why Nancy Pelosi?
Speaker 5It's easier.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's easier. No, I wish it was.
Speaker 1That's a pretty good question.
Speaker 2I wish it was no it's not easier Because they like the color blue. It's not easier, it's harder. It's not.
Speaker 1So no, check it out the reason that California turned Democrat.
Speaker 2Lady voice is because of 1980s, nancy Reagan.
Speaker 1All the illegal immigrants at the time were in California and she, as a Democrat, pushed for them to make all of them legal citizens. When she did that, that was the first time in history California switched from Republican to Democrat and forever stayed the same. Watch your borders and watch what happens. American gentlemen and ladies. What happens in this country is a real fucking epidemic.
Speaker 5Wouldn't it be strange so that's what the whole thought process was around the Biden administration allowing all these immigrants to come in.
Speaker 1Hold on, hold on, sorry, sorry, sorry. What administration? It wasn't Biden's administration. Biden was three sheets to the wind with cancer meds. It was someone else's administration, I mean whatever.
Speaker 5He was the puppet.
Speaker 1I mean whatever. Yeah, I mean, just like whoever, that is it's question mark, it's asterisk.
Speaker 5It'll have an asterisk. I mean, we don't know who was pulling the strings, who was signing anything. It doesn't seem like it was him from all reports, because now it seems like you even see that his fucking press secretary came out with a book that chicken.
Speaker 2She's trying so hard to be like look guys, I was like put there, you know like I didn't even apply for that job.
Speaker 4the whole time I was actually put there, I didn't even apply for that job.
Speaker 2You guys ever hear that I was actually doing a tour of the White House and they just picked me the fuck out of there.
Speaker 5You guys ever hear Stockholm Syndrome while I had it?
Speaker 3Biden basically came out and was like I'm picking a black woman. He was like what the fuck?
Speaker 2A black woman of lesbian color.
Speaker 1Biden was like I need a lot of black women. I need a black woman president, I need a black woman vice president.
Speaker 3Mr President, you are president, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1Then let me get a press secretary.
Speaker 4Can I get a press secretary that's black? Okay, we'll fill that one in, we'll find one for you.
Speaker 1Can I get a swimming pool full with children?
Speaker 3Is that around here? Do you want black ones or white ones?
Speaker 1I want them all I want them to look at my hairs while I talk about cockroaches.
Speaker 2I want them to touch my hair.
Speaker 5When you go back into a lot of these things, even like the welfare and everything. They say that that was because the poor people were supposed to push towards the votes to people that got the welfare.
Speaker 4It happens. That's how it goes down.
Speaker 1That's what the Biden administration was See. Here's the crazy part is, once you actually get into America and you start making money and then you start rolling down your own path, you start switching sides. When you started off, you were Democrat and then you started making money and actually started making good good decisions, paying taxes, and then you're like trying to buy stuff, yeah, then you're like wait, hold on a second. I don't like. I don't like the way this is.
Speaker 1I really want to go, I really want to go republican like I like republican side now that I'm actually making wealth and wanting to make a better country and I want a safe neighborhood for my family and I don't want men in my women's bathrooms and like.
Speaker 3Well, I don't agree with that yeah, I want men in women's bathrooms, for sure, I definitely want women in men's bathrooms.
Final Thoughts and Sign-off
Speaker 4I like the option, maybe not men in women's bathrooms, but women in men's bathrooms is perfectly fine.
Speaker 3Well, one thing that definitely happened was we have bisexual bathrooms which is nice, yeah, I guess I guess I could piss anywhere now.
Speaker 2Don't matter guys. Yeah, I like those old gender bathrooms, you're like room with the toilet, yeah, like fuck it.
Speaker 1To be honest with you, I can't fight that logic. I will vote to have women allowed to option in men's bathrooms. If they want to take going there, then more power to them. But I'm just going to do a man thing in the man's bathroom. Yo, you're going to be privy to it.
Speaker 3That was on last night with South Park. Cartman got his own bathroom.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, he's whipping his toilet. He's like you're going to take it. You're going to take it. No one's in here to stop me.
Speaker 3It's like I'm at home. He said I love it. Look at Mothid here. Look at him flying around.
Speaker 5Yeah you see that Mothid appeared from Doug's hand when he fucking came.
Speaker 2He's like ah moth that appeared from Doug's hand when he fucking came.
Speaker 4He came out of his beard.
Speaker 1The old gray bush we just got a bush, yeah well you know, get off the gray. And then there was something, the brown, and he was like the old dirty wizard. I'm like yeah, I guess I'm the old dirty wizard. It's boat season. We're about to get out there.
Speaker 5You're definitely going to look like the fucking Gordon's Fisherman.
Speaker 1I hope so. I hope I can live up to that kind of title Just fucking wear a red coat all the time.
Speaker 4I mean, wasn't the Gordon's Fisherman?
Speaker 2the best time on the islanders.
Speaker 1Oh yeah.
Speaker 5Yeah, I fucking thought Jersey.
Speaker 1Yeah, the Gordon's Fisherman was the best time for them.
Speaker 2Yeah, dougie Douchebeard, that would be a pirate name.
Speaker 1Dougie.
Speaker 2Douchebeard.
Speaker 5Arr Sail the seven seas. Arr Dougie Douchebeard.
Speaker 2Oh my God, Tell us a tale there, Dougie Doucheberry. Oh my God, Tell us a tale there, Dougie Doucheberry.
Speaker 1I don't even know how to bring that one in or not. All right, you motherfuckers.
Speaker 3When I was sailing in the inlets.
Speaker 2I was sailing down under the Kiwis.
Speaker 4Our sails faced the other way. Down there, you assholes.
Speaker 2Alright.
Speaker 1As always, we love you. We appreciate you. Thanks for coming and hanging out with us. This one's coming out within the week or two, so we appreciate you. I know.
Speaker 2This was recorded in. What is it? June, I guess, just for all you guys, we're gonna put it in. Doug's treasure. Next week it's not January.
Speaker 1We love you guys. Fuck these guys. Peace out Fuck.