EP #1: Navigating Divorce with Confidence with host Cary Jacobson, Attorney & Mediator

Cary Jacobson, attorney and mediator, introduces Divorce Diaries, a podcast aimed at transforming the conversation around divorce. With an emphasis on clarity, community, and practical advice, the show seeks to provide insights and support for those navigating the complexities of divorce.

Visit JacobsonFamilyLaw.com or call 443-726-4912 for support and guidance.

Visit jacobsonworkshop.com to learn more.

Transcript

Intro/Close speaker: 0:02

welcome to divorce diaries, where Cary Jacobson brings you real stories, hard truths and practical advice on navigating divorce and family law. Whether you're going through it, considering it or just curious, this is your place for clarity, confidence and resilience.

Charlie McDermott: 0:24

Well, welcome audience. And yes, I am Cary Jacobson, thank goodness. I'm actually the producer of the show and, Cary, I'm excited for you. I know this is a project that has been on your list for quite some time and really I'm honored to bring this out to your audience. It's obviously something that you're passionate about and the public at large can use your advice and your knowledge. So again, congratulations, Cary.

Cary Jacobson: 0:52

Thank you so much.

Charlie McDermott: 0:53

And for those of you wondering who this guy is, by the way, I am part-time co-host today and then I'm back behind the scenes. I actually produce the show. But let's start, Cary. Let's start this. Your first episode with you have an audience already, I know, but there are folks who, maybe for the first time, are just getting to know you. Why don't you share your background?

Cary Jacobson: 1:19

Absolutely. Thanks for hosting, and I Cary Jacobson. I'm a family law attorney and mediator located in Maryland. I have my own practice, Jacobson Family Law, and we are a virtual practice serving clients all across Maryland, and I really just have a passion for helping people navigate the divorce process in a less adversarial way and hoping to guide people along that process.

Charlie McDermott: 1:55

Yeah, yeah. Well, I call this episode the why episode, because I really think it's important. Whether you own a business or you're passionate about something, there's usually something driving you. You know that inspiration. We'll call it what. What is it, Cary, that has inspired you to start Divorce Diaries?

Cary Jacobson: 2:15

Well, you know, even though we have educational content already out there, I think this is just another format to educate people, and I know that divorce can be super overwhelming. But I want to create a space to share stories from professionals and practical advice so that people know how to handle their own situation with as much confidence, as clarity as possible, know how to handle their own situation with as much confidence, as clarity as possible, and know that divorce doesn't have to be, you know, super confrontational, conflictual. There are ways to make it more amicable.

Charlie McDermott: 3:00

Yeah, yeah, that's a great message to get out there. Yeah, yeah, that's a great message to get out there and, I'm sure, kind of eases the feelings of many who are thinking about it. And I know my perspective. Before I, it always seemed like this you know headbutting, you know I'm going to get you type of a you know situation which, in that case, I'm sure you'll be the first one to say no one wins Right.

Cary Jacobson: 3:49

And it's yeah. So how about your, your personal or professional experience? How has that shaped your perspective on divorce and relationships? Yeah, so I started out my career in family law in the typical litigation space. You know where we did see how much of a toll litigation took on families. Just you know the parties themselves, which then trickles down to the kids who are involved in the process and realizing how toxic it really truly is. And then it doesn't have to be that way and so, yeah, you know really being in it. You know not even being a party to the process, but also you know representing people in the divorce.

Cary Jacobson: 4:38

I felt the anxiety of the frustration and the conflict, so I can only imagine what my clients were feeling, having to go through it personally. Right, like I'm the professional doing this and I'm having these feelings. So they must be having these feelings, and I have been mediation trained for a long time and just realized that that's where I wanted to focus our practice. I wanted to work with those clients who wanted a better resolution, and so that's what we have been doing now for five or six years.

Charlie McDermott: 5:18

You make a good point. We've all been in rooms where there's a certain dynamic and I'm just going to say a negative dynamic that just infects you. And I'm just going to say a negative dynamic that just infects you. Right, it's. It's got to be challenging to to be in a situation where one or two parties are very in many cases, rightly so, you know negative.

Cary Jacobson: 5:50

And you got to bring that home with you, right, I mean, or carry it, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not to mention, you know, from the professional side also having to deal with opposing counsel and how negative that often felt. And so, for lifestyle reasons, but also because I really want to help those clients reach amicable resolutions and do it in the most efficient way possible, that's really why we have tailored our practice the way we have. Yeah.

Charlie McDermott: 6:18

Love it, love it. How about your main goal or mission of Divorce Diaries?

Cary Jacobson: 6:23

Yeah. So what I really want to do with this podcast is to provide listeners with actual insights and real life lessons from professionals and maybe those who have potentially gone through a divorce, so that they can navigate their own divorce while minimizing the drama and fostering healthier outcomes for everybody involved, both themselves as well as their families.

Charlie McDermott: 6:46

So then, Cary, who, would you say then, is your target audience? I mean, who are you speaking to?

Cary Jacobson: 6:53

So I would say it's primarily for those who are going through a divorce or separation, those who may be contemplating it, but it also is going to be for those professionals who are working with people in the divorce world. You know those financial planners, coaches, therapists, the divorce world. You know those financial planners, coaches, therapists, so that they know how to direct their clients on the best, you know, approaches.

Charlie McDermott: 7:19

About topics. What can listeners expect to hear about and learn about in future episodes?

Cary Jacobson: 7:27

Yeah, so we're going to cover things like co-parenting challenges, dealing with financial planning both during and post-divorce, how to be emotionally resilient, real life stories about what works and what doesn't, so things that may have gone better if they had done it a different way.

Charlie McDermott: 7:51

Yeah, you know it's interesting. You mentioned that I was privy to an episode before this, because we're kind of. You know, it's like Hollywood here we're filming out of sequence and we're actually doing the first episode after we've done other episodes. But, you know, one of the one of you I won't, you know, reveal anything here, but what really resonated with me was she was talking about situations where someone was already divorced and kind of settled or gave in and then, years down the road, that individual looked back and was like holy cow, what was I thinking at the time? You know, financially, I guess he or she was not in a great place. So I think those are valuable lessons to hear as you're maybe making a decision and making the right decision. All right, I'm going to. I'm going to refocus before I give give away future episodes here. I'm going to refocus before I give away future episodes here, jeez, before you send me back to producing here. So what do you think makes this podcast unique compared to other resources that are out there about divorce?

Cary Jacobson: 9:02

Yeah, it's going to bring together both those professionals and those real life stories things that we have, you know, seen when representing clients throughout the process not just to highlight the problems but also focus on some of the solutions. You know, it's going to be grounded in honesty and the belief that every challenge presents an opportunity to grow from it, and we hope that clients will, or listeners will, take those lessons and address them in their particular situation.

Charlie McDermott: 9:41

Yeah, but you make a good point. I mean whether they're listeners, clients, potential clients. You know, and I know you're focused in the state of Maryland, but I'm sure there are individuals from outside of the state that will pick up some great tips and information and I'm sure there are other wonderful attorneys outside of Maryland, maybe not quite as good as you, but you know that can help.

Cary Jacobson: 10:06

How about?

Charlie McDermott: 10:07

is there a particular moment or story in your life that you know that made you realize this podcast was something that you needed to do?

Cary Jacobson: 10:17

again is just a different mode of educational content, but really what set it for me was that clients once shared how a simple shift in their communication with their co-parent saved years of litigation. So you know, just a different way of communicating helped prevent years of litigation and that really reinforced my belief in the power of education and storytelling that's going to transform how people approach the divorce process.

Charlie McDermott: 10:56

Yeah, yeah. So your listeners, you're doing something a bit unique here in that you're looking for engagement, obviously and I know this podcast is going to appear a lot of different platforms you know the obvious Apple and Amazon and Spotify and social media but you also have a text number I'll call it where your listeners can engage. They might have questions, they might have other topic ideas that they would love to hear you maybe expand upon, maybe they have guest suggestions. So I'm going to share that number with everyone real quick and then we'll make sure we include this number, you know, in in all the show notes and so forth. So the area code is 443-726-4912, that's 443-726-4912, and you can text that number and you will hear back, uh, Cary and and her, and we can even, you know, have a special section in future podcasts Cary, if you're cool with that where you can actually give credit if that individual wants credit for bringing up a topic or has a specific question. So, with that, what are you most excited about?

Cary Jacobson: 12:18

you know, as this journey begins here, I am so excited to build a community of support where listeners can feel heard, they can gain practical knowledge and hopefully leave inspired to approach their challenge with more courage and grace. Through you know, throughout this process, yeah, yeah.

Charlie McDermott: 12:40

And it is this process, yeah, yeah, and it is a process, I would imagine. So, for someone tuning in now, whether it's a few months from now, a few years from now what piece of advice would you give them that maybe could help them through this tough time that they're going through?

Cary Jacobson: 13:03

I think, first and foremost is simply knowing that you're not alone and that choosing to go through a divorce or having to go through a divorce because even if you weren't the one to make that choice doesn't define who you are and it's really just something that has to happen. It doesn't have to define your future. So just take it one step at a time. Focus on what you can control yourself and then lean into those resources that can really support you through that process.

Charlie McDermott: 13:38

Awesome, Awesome. How about listeners who want to connect, want to learn more? What's the best way for them to do so?

Cary Jacobson: 13:44

Yeah, so they can go to the website, which is jacobsonfamilylawcom, or they can find us on pretty much any social media channel and or text with any suggestions for topics, anything anybody would like us to cover.

Charlie McDermott: 14:02

Awesome. And again that number is 443-726-4912. Harry, final thought, Anything else you'd like to share as we kick off Divorce Diaries?

Cary Jacobson: 14:16

Really just that. Divorce is a journey. It's not a specific destination. I hope that Divorce Diaries becomes a trusted companion along the way and that we offer encouragement and wisdom, and thank you all for tuning in.

Charlie McDermott: 14:35

Well, thank you, Cary, congratulations and looking forward to what you're creating here.

Cary Jacobson: 14:41

Thank you, Cary, congratulations and looking forward to what you're creating here.

Intro/Close speaker: 14:43

Thank you so much. Thanks for joining us today on this episode of Divorce Diaries. Remember, every journey is unique, but you don't have to navigate it alone. Visit JacobsonFamilyLawcom or call 443-726-4912 for support and guidance.