Mystical Misfits with Courtney and Phil
Welcome to The Mystical Misfits, a journey into the heart of mysticism, self-discovery, and spiritual connection. Here, we believe that everyone has the power to be their own mystic, as they begin to trust their intuition, embrace their own unique path, and recognize that we are all divinely connected to each other and to the universe.
In each episode, we explore the deeper layers of spiritual life, from the transitting sky above, energy work, and human experience. Our goal is to help you feel loved, supported, and seen by the cosmos, as we all align with the rhythms of the planets and the wisdom of your own soul.
Whether you're new to mysticism or a seasoned seeker, The Mystical Misfits invites you to tune in, relax, and connect with a community of kindred spirits. Let's decode the stars, tap into our highest selves, and embrace the magic that’s always around us.
Come as you are, and let's make sense of the mystical world together.
Mystical Misfits with Courtney and Phil
The Healing Power of Connection
It's a beautiful time to pause and reflect. Join Courtney and Phil as they navigate the whirl of festivities, sharing their personal stories and humorous anecdotes that capture the spirit of this special time. It's a season of joy, peace, and the unexpected comforts that guide us through life's dissonances.
In our exploration of connections, we delve into the emotional bond between humans and their pets, offering insights into the safety and solace they provide. We journey through the poignant themes of Matthew Perry's autobiography, contemplating the intertwined paths of fame, addiction, and the quest for self-forgiveness. Perry's legacy serves as a poignant reminder of our universal struggles with love and acceptance, while his portrayal on "Friends" continues to resonate, offering enduring lessons in connection and courage. Unpack this rich tapestry of stories and reflections with us, and find inspiration in the shared human experience.
hi bill, it's so nice to see you hi, courtney. Yes, it's great to see you too we're coming to the end of the year yes, it comes up fast, doesn't it? I think what I think so interesting is how many, how much more the holidays came up quicker, I think, because thanksgiving was so late that, like all of a sudden it's christmas or hanukkah and the new year and it's out of nowhere.
Speaker 2:That's right, and it's you know, it's Hanukkah and Christmas occurring at the same time, which is unusual, right? I think it's once every 20 years that that occurs about about every 20 years.
Speaker 1:I was. I actually was wondering how, was wondering how often that was. Is it in a 20-year cycle? I guess it depends on the moons right.
Speaker 2:Right, exactly, the Hebrew calendar is moon-based and the Western calendar is solar, so they eventually catch up to each other every 20 years, just like any synodic cycle, right? So that's the way I think of it.
Speaker 1:I like that. Well, actually I'm really excited for this year, this New Year's, because this will be the first New Year's that I can remember, since I followed the moon, where it's going to be a new moon for New Year's. New Year's so how much. Usually you know, if you started a habit or a new goal, it doesn't really work every year. So just I'm like this doesn't make any sense. But this year I'm like, okay, this is actually going to be really good.
Speaker 2:If I wanted to start something new, a new habit or a new goal, I think it would be very helpful on this New Year's to do that yeah, if there is ever an ideal time to set intentions, the stars it's, it's all aligned to to empower you to do that, because I think, because of the particular alignment, your intentions will have more impact, they will manifest.
Speaker 1:Yes, which usually I think they don't, because it doesn't synchronize very well, but I do think that our intentions will. Yeah, what are you going to do for your intention? Have you thought about it yet?
Speaker 2:I do think about it a lot and I wait till just a couple of days beforehand, till after the Christmas craziness, to really. That's when I really start reflecting and thinking about what I would like to see and do for the next year and what I hope for what I would like to see and do for the next year and what I hope for.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think it's what I hope for. I always say a lot of people don't know what they want until you know what you don't want, and so I think it is an interesting idea. It's like what don't I want? I want peace, and I find a lot of people want peace right now. It's just, I want a little, I want to feel calm.
Speaker 2:I want to feel good in my relationships. Yeah, that in itself is something to be grateful for if that's what you're experiencing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, right.
Speaker 2:Because I see and hear so much and I have nothing but admiration for people who are, let's say, going through it, whatever it may be, how they overcome these challenges. That I'm, you know, I'm in awe of, of what they are doing, and when I'm in it I'm not feeling that way about myself, but at the end of the year I can reflect back and sit, tell myself you know, when this year started, I had all these concerns and goals and anxieties and things that were really playing at the forefront of my mind, and they're not there anymore. They're only going to be replaced with new things, and that's the way it's going to be. So that idea does give me some strength and some solace.
Speaker 1:I think it's interesting. You said that. You see, I appreciate that. You said you see so much strength in other people and I think that probably why you see so much strength in other people, is because you're pretty strong, right, I think we see what in others what we need to see about ourselves.
Speaker 1:Good and bad, good and bad. I think that's the like. How much I keep on asking that, like when I have any kind of issues with anybody, or if I'm thinking about something, or something bothers me, I'm like, okay, there's something about this within me that I need to understand about myself, or or if it's that I see something beautiful in somebody else, there's something in me that is also beautiful, and so I think I think, phil, that you have a lot of strength and it's it's nice. It's nice that you have so much strength and you have so much clarity and you're stronger than you even know. But I think you know that, but I think that there's something so beautiful about that.
Speaker 2:I do like to root for people. I, you know, I do like to do that, you know, and I find myself on YouTube just surfing things and looking at animal rescue videos and feeling the same way you know I want I'm rooting for them all.
Speaker 1:Oh, I think it's I was talking to my daughters about. Like one of my daughters thought this I think when you can root for somebody else such a beautiful thing, right when you really can wish someone well, and I think when we're happy and content in our own life, it is actually easier to wish somebody else well and want someone else to do well. And when we yeah, so it's amen to you, especially those animals, right, there's something. So humans, you know, they, they, they talk, they have stuff. That's actually a very funny story.
Speaker 1:So my mother at one time I was young and I actually said to my I must've said something back to my mother and we ended up getting this is a long time ago, this is must be 30, over 30 years ago and so we got into like I guess we got into an argument and she didn't talk to me for a couple of days and she went out and bought a dog and she says you know what the best part of this dog is? The dog doesn't talk back. Meanwhile, I, I have to say something. I really don't talk back like I, I still don't talk back so much. I'm very like, I'm very respectful and I love her and we have. We have a good, really really really good relationship.
Speaker 1:So anyway she gets this dog but in a couple years we go back to talking everything and a couple years later the dog bites her. I said I guess the dog talks back. She didn't keep the dog and the dog actually like attack, I mean literally attacked her, and I thought you had to be careful what you say. She's had so many dogs. They've never attacked her before. But it was an interesting thing because the dog talked back yes, you're dead isn't that funny.
Speaker 1:It's a very. Yes, I think that's a very funny story. I was like be careful what you say, because those angels. They're watching. Even when you say the positive, they don't talk back. Maybe they'll be talking back to you. Animals are kind. I mean, we're actually getting a dog, so so we're in the process of figuring out what to name the dog, and it's been a very. I was telling you that before, yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm excited about your new dog that's. I'm going to have lots of fun.
Speaker 1:I know you forget. How did you ever have a? Did you have dogs when you were growing up?
Speaker 2:Oh man, yeah, they just the best, best pals, you know always, you know up for a game of, you know catching the ball or whatever it was. Oh, yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we never had a dog that actually caught the ball, like we never had a dog where they would actually catch the ball and then come back never. Maybe this dog will. We've never had that kind of dog. But I will say, unconditional love is what I appreciate about animals usually, except for that story about my mother. But she, she was probably doing something that that affected the dog and the dog got scared.
Speaker 2:So like you. It's interesting, though, that they have you get to know their personality. It's, don't you find that amazing? You just think of them as a cat or a dog, but after you get to know them, that doesn't describe them at all. You know, it's they. They have a first name and that first name means a whole bunch of things you know because you associate it with the personality and their behavior and their. You know what they, why do they prefer some things over others? And it's just fascinating to me that and you get to, you get to shorthand all of this with them. You know, they just, they just know what your next move is, and you know it's. And they surprise you too, because they, you know, they remind, they remind me that they, they ground me that's the best way to say it you know yeah, I think I that's an.
Speaker 1:I never. I've never actually thought about an animal, but that is what they do. They ground you, they, they remind you to love you. Also, they open your heart. I always think that's an interesting thing, which is very grounding in itself and they're easy to love. But they do, they have. I was thinking that because our dog had passed a couple months ago and it's been really hard, but they do, they have. I was thinking that because our dog had passed a couple of months ago and it's been really hard, but they can't replace your other dog because your other dog, like someone's, like you have to get another dog and I'm like I don't know, I'm very mixed feelings about it, because you have this one dog that you fall in love with, with their personality, and there's going to be no one like that dog and yet, except another dog, however they're, yeah, they do have very different personalities yep, but then I think how lucky I am to have gotten to know that personality and that personality knows me so well.
Speaker 2:Like we're, we were just like this in a ways that some ways deeper and closer than you would have with another human.
Speaker 1:I think it's easier. I mean I, I, I do think it's easier, like my mom said, to let a dog in than a person, because a person can hurt you and animals don't tend to. But humans hurt people. I mean right here and I always go back hurt people hurt people, so it's not personal. I try to tell everyone that it's it's. If someone hurts you, it really is not personal, it's it's the person's hurt's. So hard for me to think that way.
Speaker 2:And I completely agree. And I know, you're right, a hundred percent, that it it's them. And you know, if they're behaving in ways that hurt other people, you know, I know that they're, you know, I know that they're signaling something into the situation. And you know, tell myself again, how, how is it that they're coping with all this stuff? I'm, you know, I'm reading the uh auto, the autobiography of matthew perry, which is, you know, really. You know, considering how things ended for him. It's much more weighted than it was when the book came out because, by all appearances, he seemed to have licked his demons, but that wasn't the case. And you know the idea that he died alone, in his pool, you know, overlooking los angeles and being so well loved and renowned and wealthy, and having it all and very, very alone, alone, alone, alone was like, okay, everybody should read this book.
Speaker 1:No one will do drugs, like she thought like I don't know, I didn't read it, but she was like if, if you don't want to do drugs, all you do is read this book.
Speaker 1:Because it is like don't do drugs. I don't know if you're feeling the same way, but it was like such a clear. And what I thought was interesting is is is that I don't know if she read it. I think she must have read it after he died, because she was like a very big friends she loves friends and and what she said was was how much he wasn't really able to forgive, like he was still in his. So I don't know, are you, do you feel that way when you're reading the book? Like she felt like he even in the book it was very he wasn't. He was still very much talking about his past and very much about his story and and it was bothering her a lot and she's just like this guy is like very much still in his story or his past and he can't seem to forgive. And I think one of the biggest things about being clean or Is forgiveness, right? I mean, that is one of the steps of AA, I believe, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think your daughter was spot on about that because, yeah, I found that he was still, as I'm getting to the part about his recovery, still focused on the drugs, talking about the drugs, how many drugs, where the drugs were, how like he was a drug expert and, at the same time, trying not to be, which is just you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I have like mixed feelings because I I don't like. I, you know, I think they're suing the doctors and the people. But I was thinking about this right, if you've ever known an addict or people, people do what they want to do and if you're his, you know his, his assistant. If the assistant didn't get him drugs, he's going to fire the assistant and then you're you're going to lose your job and so at some point right, if you're going to, if someone's going to do something to themselves, there's only so much you can do for them. And if you want to keep your job and make that kind of money, it's like the but did you? Actually there was. I don't know if that was in the book, but I read somewhere that he said if I could become, if I could get famous and get a show, you could do whatever you want to me, did you? Was that in the book or did I just?
Speaker 2:have to yeah, that was the deal he made with God.
Speaker 1:Well, I'll say that's the deal he made with the devil.
Speaker 2:Right Because.
Speaker 1:God doesn't make deals like that right. Yeah is that-.
Speaker 2:He wanted fame that much and he deserved it. He was talented and he was really you know he said he was so talented.
Speaker 1:They actually I think the people on the show said he is one of the most talented people there was, like, I think, in People Magazine. So funny that you're reading the book, because in People Magazine they just had his or they just had his family, or maybe it was on like the Today Show or something and I saw a clip on YouTube. And I was on like the Today Show or something and I saw a clip on YouTube and I was thinking like I guess it could be really hard, right, they both, both parents got remarried, then they had these big families and he did not have that same kind of feeling.
Speaker 2:That's right, and so he probably he really that was his big wound and he was very explicit about it and that was it was the theme throughout his book and it's it's, you know, it's damaging and and it's terrible that he wasn't able to overcome it kept thinking to myself, man, he and I would be friends if we knew each other. He just had this vibe of you know he was funny and, you know, had this sarcastic edge and you know he's he definitely seemed like fun person to be around, like very vital uh, and you just watch him being taken down yeah, drugs are um, I'll say, just say no yes, just say no, I, I go back to like I, I I've been like, I think a lot about you.
Speaker 1:know, we talk a lot about the 12th house and Pisces and energy, and I think there is a correlation with addicts that are really looking for the divine right and in the moment, maybe you think you connect to God, but it is never the way and it is never the way. And I do think there is something about the brightest lights have the darkest darks. Right about the brightest lights have the darkest darks right, and so he.
Speaker 2:I wish he had found, I had found his peace right and he he's he was. He said that as well.
Speaker 1:He was searching for god and he, you know, he, he wanted yes oh yes, did he absolutely in the book that, the book that you're going along with. Do you think that he talked about finding God throughout at all during any of his sobriety experiences, through the experiences of sobriety, versus when he was doing drugs?
Speaker 2:It was almost like God was finding him, because he would have these epiphanies, these periods where he would, you know, get sober and really want to do well and really want to help others, and that was motivated by God. According to him, he was pretty much you know, I'm powerless, powerless, and you know, there there's a higher power, he's so he, he, yeah, he yeah, I I'm having like such an issue.
Speaker 1:It's actually interesting because I try to be very open-minded and I try to not have too many opinions, but I keep on thinking about how so many people are using drugs to find god right, even, yeah, even, I know PTSD stuff, ketamine, and so I get, I get that it helps at some point, right, but then where does where's across the line and how do you? And I, I think, if you, yeah, I'm having, I've had some mixed feelings and I know a lot of people are finding spirituality through doing, you know, things outside themselves and I, I just I was hoping, especially like going into the next year, how important it is to not be doing that, how important it is to be very clean, almost.
Speaker 2:All right, I so. I I'm on the fence about ayahuasca, you know, the taking the herbs and going through the ceremony and being transported. I'm just not, you know, and I'm not judging anybody, but for me that's just not how I want to get there. I just and I hear from people how wonderful it is and I envy them Honestly I do, but I also think there's Don't envy them.
Speaker 1:I think you go to Ram Dass, right, and he he says, like you you would have, like he was one of those people that really was advocating for it, you really thought that it could help, but then the low, when you get off of it, it's too hard. In between is, I think though I think you may be understand it or kind of know a higher consciousness, but I do think there's too much of a separation from where you are here and that place, and then so you're always looking for that high where you're getting it daily.
Speaker 2:I, yes, I'm feel like I am connected that way when I do my yoga practice in the morning. So I mean and it's not as intense as you know, seeing things, but I know how I feel. I know that I'm feeling like I'm being embraced. I know that for sure and it's.
Speaker 1:I think that's what makes me so sad about Matthew Perry is that he didn't let people love him. Maybe, yes, right, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know, but he didn't feel embraced, that, he didn't feel that love that we all are searching for. Did he say that?
Speaker 2:Absolutely, he said. As soon as anyone got close, I bolted. He didn't want to be the one to be rejected, so he would reject them first. He was quite open about it and it had to do with his feelings of abandonment from his childhood.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I it's, it's, it goes back to the dog. But it is interesting how hard it is for us to open our heart. I really do believe that we can. I think we can love everybody, but then when we love somebody, we we take a chance of getting hurt.
Speaker 2:Right, it requires a lot of courage, you know, I think, and that courage is a an amazing quality to have, I think, you know, because if and especially if the courage is coming from your heart, right then it's, it's like can I think you can take all the hits and still get up and keep going because you're, because you're brave? That's I think, that's that's what life calls us all to do, I think, and that's our challenge.
Speaker 1:Is our challenge and I think our and our, our and usually people's biggest challenges are the relationships they're in, because that's our daily and that's how we learn, right. So, yeah, it's an. He's an interesting, I will. I'll say I think he got what he wanted in some ways, if you think about it right, because he did die and someone as rich as him and as famous as him can have so much pain, right, it reminds us that we're all very similar and that you know, within a moment's time, our life is so precious and so maybe he helped a lot of people get clean after all, not the way we want it to happen, but maybe, maybe he did.
Speaker 2:That's so interesting that you say that, because he did say in the book I would. It would be nice to be remembered for friends, you know, but I really wanted to be remembered as a guy who helped others, you know, especially get through their addictions, and so that's what he really wanted, and you know and and he got that.
Speaker 1:I mean he really got it right. He got two years I think it was two years before he wrote the book went on a publicity tour. You know, people read the book and now people are reading the book and I think you're right from a whole important perspective that you know if you do drugs there's a good chance that you won't survive. And even drugs that are given to you by a doctor, I mean it kind of is like profound in a way. I'll say, who knows, maybe he's in here chatting with us.
Speaker 2:Sure, but that yeah, well, that would be great. Hopefully he is, and you know he's, he's. He's hearing us speak with love and admiration.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, he really. I mean, have you watched? You watch, Friends, I mean it's really.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, brilliant, have you watched?
Speaker 1:it. It's such a brilliant so the kids always have this show on and I was like this show is so brilliant. I mean the communication between them, the relationships between them, the fact that they had the show for however many years.
Speaker 2:And I think it was 10 years.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and each person's personality grew up on the show and each person became who they were meant to be, became who they were meant to be and, and I don't know, it's a. It's really an amazing. It's amazing piece of art, which I think is so rare today that a show can be so good and years and years later. How many years ago is that? 20 years ago.
Speaker 2:It ended about more than 20 years ago now, I think.
Speaker 1:Wait, really.
Speaker 2:I yeah, so it was 2003 or something like that.
Speaker 1:That's amazing.
Speaker 2:The thing that I think distinguished that sitcom and I like sitcoms, I like comedy writing, I like comedy but what distinguished that show from all the others for me was that I actually wanted to hang out with these characters. I wanted to be their friends, you know, and that's the way I felt. I just felt like I was spending quality time with these really great people, you know. So other shows can be really funny and raunchy and bawdy and extreme and slapstick and that's great. I love that. But these guys I wanted to be friends with. I know that sounds corny but that's how I went.
Speaker 1:I think they felt like your friends. Somebody could identify with each person on the show. I mean, it was kind of amazing, right, you could be their friend, even if that was. Yeah, that's interesting. I think they felt like my friends too.
Speaker 2:And I remember when it was first on the air it really was appointment television. Everybody watched the show on Thursday night and talked about it on Friday. Everybody did that.
Speaker 1:You had to watch it. I mean, that's what's like. I think we're missing on TV now. Like you, if you want to watch a show, you have to watch.
Speaker 2:Right, you have to watch it. Well. Well, now you can watch a show at any time, anywhere, and things like that, and so it's not the same like you have to tune in at eight o'clock on thursday to catch it, you know, and that's what was made it even, it made it more exciting yeah.
Speaker 1:I always said wait, yeah, yeah, you come in. There's is my daughter. Say hello Hi. Look Ben down, say hi Hi.
Speaker 2:Is that Claire?
Speaker 1:That's Charlie.
Speaker 2:This is my baby, hi Nice to meet you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's tall. No, now, whoever, if we put this up, they'll meet. Charlie, that's my little ones. I have three daughters. That's my youngest daughter, who's 19. Oh, she's tall, is she? Tall, she looks like she's five, seven, I think, five so. But I'm like, so I, I sit on the ground and so oh, I see hello everybody. Yeah, no, but I do. I think they feel like our friends.
Speaker 1:And I actually think that there I always said that I'm so blessed that I am not raised now. Oh my God, I would never be able to stop watching TV If I was raised where there was TV like Netflix, where it was consistently and I oh my God, I think that I just would wouldn't get anything. I mean, I probably got anything done when I was younger anyway, but I I think it would have been like a real addiction yeah, same here.
Speaker 2:I mean, I can remember when there was just three major networks and pbs and that was pretty much it and everyone you know. We had one television. So now you've got several devices personally to watch shows on. So it was definitely. The viewing experience has changed considerably.
Speaker 1:I do think that's an interesting thing. It's like around the water cooler you would have something to talk about. Where I think there is that we don't have that as much anymore. I think that's why people probably talk a that as much anymore. I think that's why people probably talk a lot more about politics.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Right. I mean, if you think about it Right, what do people all talk about? They talk about politics.
Speaker 2:Right, and even then when they're, when they're talking about politics, it all depends on where they're getting their information from Right. So it's not even you know. It's much different from when there were just a small number of networks and everyone was receiving the same news in the same way. That's gone now. So it's all depends on perceptions and how, how the information is portrayed and communicated.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and how? Yeah, and it is very interesting on how we perceive things and how we believe things, based on on what we choose to listen to or who we choose to spend our time with. You know, I used to take a class and the guy was like what you put in your hopper is so important what you put in your mind.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. It's absolutely true. So that's I. You know, I feel like I'm when I do yoga in the morning. It's like um mental and spiritual hygiene. You know, I'm cleaning stuff out and refreshing everything, um so that I don't get that buildup of stuff from media, from people I interact with, whatever it may be. I need to flush it out and refresh my system.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think and we've talked about this before but how important it is really to be doing that and how important it is to be careful with our thoughts and our mind and what information we're putting in and receiving and what we believe, and I think that's an interesting. It's interesting. Well, I'm glad you're reading the book. I hope to find out how you liked it at the end of it and see what you got out of it, so maybe what you can tell us next week how, how it, how but I thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 2:I think it's a it's an important conversation to have yeah, I, I'm almost finished and I don't think I would have read it had he not had the unfortunate end that he had, but it definitely as much weightier as a read than he probably ever intended it to be because of what happened to him.
Speaker 1:Well, it's funny because he wrote half the book in notes, like in his iPhone, like he literally sat like this and texted and put in notes, and that's how I write everything in notes. And so after I heard that, I was like, look, if he could write a book on notes, I could do all my writing in notes. But I think it was really from him, I think he really was telling his story, because it seemed as if he was. I think he used to sit in the hot tub and write the book and when you're in the hot tub or when you're in bathtubs or when you're, you are connected to a higher, higher way. So maybe he was connected the whole time he was writing.
Speaker 2:He was bearing his soul for. For whatever you might think of his behavior or his thought patterns or whatever it might be, he definitely put it out there and I have to commend him for that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it takes a lot of courage to to share your truth, you know, and to share your story. It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:So, so nice to talk to you. I, I really love speaking to you. It's always such a such a beautiful blessing to share time with you and just get to know you better and get to know everything. It's nice I always.
Speaker 2:I enjoy this so much, so thank you thank you and we're so.
Speaker 1:We're so grateful for everybody that's listening. It's um. I hope you feel like we're your friends. Yes.
Speaker 2:Yes, that would be so nice right. Yeah, make us appointment viewing if you would like to hear more from us. I think that would be great.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because you are our friends. You know, if you're willing to spend time with us and share time with us, you're our friends. So I'll see you next week.
Speaker 2:Thanks, courtney, bye, bye.