The Napkin In Between

A Sunday Afternoon Rant...

• Daijné Jones • Season 1 • Episode 36

Share episode

Moving apartments shouldn't feel like a fight to the death, yet that's exactly what it's become in New York City. Picture this: you're balanced on a pedestal, unable to step off too early (landlords won't show you apartments a month before your move date), forced to wait until the perfect moment when you must sprint against countless others toward the same limited housing options. This absurd reality perfectly captures how we've complicated the most basic human needs.

Why do landlords insist on showing apartments only two weeks before availability? Why do employers require multiple interviews for straightforward positions? The pattern is clear - those in positions of power create unnecessary obstacles, turning life's essentials into exhausting competitions. During my recent apartment hunt, every interaction with male landlords and agents reminded me how much harder they make these processes than necessary.

This manufactured difficulty extends beyond housing into our broader social fabric. We're witnessing a culture where violent rhetoric is defended as "opinion" until it manifests as physical violence, at which point everyone expresses shock while refusing accountability. The recent controversy surrounding Jimmy Kimmel's show being pulled after his comments about political violence highlights this hypocrisy. Those claiming to champion free speech are often the first to silence opposing viewpoints.

America's complicated relationship with violence deserves honest examination. While I'm not condoning violence, it's ahistorical to claim it "never solves anything" in a country literally founded through violent revolution. The deeper issue is why people who claim to dislike others can't simply leave them alone - instead, they actively work to make life harder for those with different identities or perspectives.

We live on a floating rock in space where none of these complications are inherently necessary. Life could be so much simpler if we chose respect and coexistence over obstruction and hostility. This isn't just wishful thinking - it's a reminder that the systems making our lives difficult were created by people and can be changed by people. The question is: when will we decide that life doesn't have to be this hard?

Daijné:

Is this thing on? Hello, hello, uh-oh, another yapper with a mic. Hello everyone, and welcome back to the napkin in Between podcast. I am your host, Daijné Jones. I hope everyone's been having a good week, except for that orange drink, lady, of course.

Daijné:

Oy, you guys, it has been a crazy couple of weeks for me. I, my head is spinning. Today we're not. I know y'all come here for education and I love to keep y'all informed and educated, but, girl, we ain't reading and writing today. Today we are ranting because I, these past couple weeks, have been absolutely insane and it is all because I am doing the top one worst adult activities. I know, I'm not talking about going to a JLo concert, I'm talking about moving. I hate moving. Me and my roommate are currently well, not anymore. We finally finalized everything, but these last couple of weeks we have been moving. Me and my roommate are currently well, not anymore. We finally finalized everything, but these last couple of weeks we have been moving.

Daijné:

And so last week I missed you guys on the podcast. I honestly it slipped my mind because we've been looking at apartments and trying to, like you know, budget, like, figure everything out, and so it slipped my mind to record an episode and so I think it was like late Friday night maybe like early Saturday, like at after midnight on Friday I filmed an episode and then I woke up Saturday super early like did all of the editing blah, blah, blah go to export the episode and it disappeared, poof, into thin fucking air. And I was like hello, like where did it go? So I'm like looking through my laptop, I turned my laptop off and back on. I did like a restoring thing quite literally disappeared into thin fucking air. So I was like okay, um, I guess we won't have a podcast episode this week, which I fucking hate. I hate missing weeks because I love I really do love filming the pod and editing and uploading it and seeing your guys' responses to it. Like it's literally like one of the best parts of my week is just like putting the pod out, because I like this has always been my dream. I've always wanted a podcast. I've actually wanted a talk show. I would love to have a talk show where, like I have guests come on, we interview them and talk. That's like well, like y'all who are here with me just sitting in my bed, once we get there, we're gonna look back to this and be like holy shit, like zam, that's crazy anyway. So that was last week and then again again.

Daijné:

On top of all of that, me and my roommate are trying to move and something I've learned about moving, especially in New York City, is that landlords make the process so much harder. If I had to compare moving in New York City to anything in the world, I would probably compare it to the Hunger Games day one, like when if you've seen the Hunger Games, they have to stand on these like pedestals and then the cornucopia is in the middle with like all these weapons and like um resources and backpacks and different shit like that. If I had to compare moving in New York City to anything, it would absolutely be that because the pedestal represents your move date, okay, and you can't. In the book and in the movies you know that they say like if you step off the pedestal before the horn goes, where all the kids run to the cornucopia, if you step off of it before, it will like blow you up, right, right. That's kind of like what it is trying to move close to your move-in date because the way landlords are in the city is you can go to them like a month or so before you want to move.

Daijné:

Right, like for us, we wanted to move October 1st. So we started looking September 1st for apartments Seems seems reasonable, right, like a month before you know what I'm saying. We go to landlords and we're like, hey, we're interested in your apartment, we'd like to move October 1st. Can we see your apartment? And they're like, like, oh, that move-in date is kind of far, mind you, less than a month away, right? Or like once we started looking September 1st, like we would need to move by the end of the month. Our lease is up on September 30th.

Daijné:

But the way the landlords in the city work is they want someone to start their lease as soon as possible. So if you start looking on September 1st, they want you to. The latest that they said that they could sign us was September 15th. Mind you, again, our lease isn't up until September 30th, so we're not really looking for any overlap. We'd like to move from one place to the next.

Daijné:

So we're like, no, that doesn't really work for us. Like, do you have any? You know flexibility? And they're like, no, we want someone who can start the lease September 15th. So we keep running into this problem because again, we're standing in on our pedestal Like the cornucopia is the apartment right and then the pedestal is your start date, that you want to move into the apartment. So we we now have to stand there until like two weeks before, because the second we try to step off our pedestal they're like nope, nope, your date is too far. So we kept reaching out to landlords or whatever, trying to see if anyone had any flexibility. They did not, which I don't even understand.

Daijné:

Because if I'm telling you like hey, I'm interested in your apartment, I want to sign this year-long lease, what's the difference from me starting the year-long lease october 1st versus someone else who's going to start a year-long lease September 15th? They're both a year long. It's not like you're getting extra money, like it just doesn't make sense. And even if you are, I guess in some instances it can be like extra because they'll prorate the rent. So you pay half the month and then start the first full month in October, full month in October. But like you really need that little half month's rent, that bad. Where I'm telling you, hey, I'm interested in your apartment, I have all my documents, my credit's good, here's all my shit. But instead of accepting that, because you don't get that one little half month's rent. You'll go to the next Joe Schmo who can give you that half month's rent, Like, do you really need money? That bad, get your fucking money up. You broke ass bitches, anyway.

Daijné:

So we can't move from our pedestal until like two weeks before our move date, right? So mid-month, september 15th, around. We start like people are starting to be like okay, yeah, october 1st is a fine moving date, whatever, whatever. But remind you, we're looking to move in two weeks, right, october 1st, but so are like at least five other people at the very same time. So once you find an apartment that's like the air horn for to run towards the cornucopia, which is the apartment, right, so you have to beat everybody else to the cornucopia, get all of your documents in, have everything ready, whatever, whatever.

Daijné:

Literally, it feels like you're fighting for your life. Quite literally you are. You're trying to find a place to live, right, so you have to essentially fight for your life against all these people who are also trying to move in two weeks that you're trying to move in and hope for the best, hope that you come out as the lone victor. I don't know if that analogy just made sense. Again, my head is fucking spinning because of all of the shit we've had to do these past couple of weeks. But that is like genuinely to me. If I had to describe what it is like to move in New York City, that's how I would describe it. You have to stand on your pedestal. If you try to move any earlier, they're gonna blow your fucking head off and then, like two weeks a week out my honestly, a week out. I'm saying two weeks, but we're literally we signed our lease yesterday and we move in a week, so a week out. You find the apartment that you like and you have to run to it quicker than everybody else, submit all of your documents and hope that the landlord will pick you over the 10 other people who are also applying for your apartment.

Daijné:

And I just feel like things are difficult enough, right, like trying to keep a job and have an apartment and like balance work life, personal life, like it's all already so fucking difficult and it just feels like sometimes people make things more difficult than they need to be and I I feel like it happens a lot with like things that we need to survive, like um, job applications or like applying for a house, like I feel like they they just make it harder than it has to be. Like for jobs you'll have, they have these like a thousand page applications and then they, they want you to do one interview and then you want to. They want you to come in for a follow-up interview. Like three fucking interviews. Like do y'all want somebody to work? Or fucking not. Like same thing with housing. It's like y'all make this so much more stressful than it needs to be.

Daijné:

And then they like there's so many apartments, especially in New York City, where I've lived in a couple different places, I feel like New York City, in my experience, has been by far the worst. They'll have pictures of the apartment and then you'll go see the apartment and you're like this is not the apartment that y'all had in them. Fucking pictures like it's. It's literally like catfishing. They know how to like hold their camera so that the rooms and everything looks so much nicer or bigger than it actually is. And then you go see it in person and it's like a little fucking tiny box of an apartment and you're like, and that's kind of how new york city apartments are anyway, they are smaller because there's has to be so many, because so many people live here, but it's like y'all play, like y'all, y'all be, y'all play, y'all play, because y'all knew there was no way that I could fit my fucking shit in here.

Daijné:

Then they want to charge you a fucking arm and a leg again. I understand because it's in new york city, but it's like everything's just getting fucking out of hand. Everything's so fucking expensive it's, and New York City, but it's like everything's just getting fucking out of hand. Everything's so fucking expensive it's. And not only is it expensive, but it's fucking.

Daijné:

They make it so much harder than it has to be. Like do you want someone to live here or not? Do you want someone to work here or not? But then they'll turn around and be like oh, nobody wants to work these days, nobody wants to this, nobody. And it's like we do. Y'all just make it incredibly fucking hard with these long ass job applications and processes or these short ass windows to find an apartment. Like life does not have to be this hard.

Daijné:

I don't understand why people make things so much harder than they have to be. And it's like if I was a landlord, I already know I would try to make this the smoothest process in the world, because moving is already incredibly stressful. You're trying to find somewhere to live that's in your budget but also close to work, but also has amenities and things that you want, but is also in a neighborhood that you like but also like, is close to like a place, to a grocery shop, and there's just all of these moving parts. When it comes to moving that, all this added stress of oh, you're looking too early or oh, you know, we have all these applications, but submit yours as well, like it is literally like a fight to the death. It feels like sometimes to do all this shit like and it doesn't have to be this hard.

Daijné:

I genuinely don't understand why people make things so much harder than they have to make them and honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, I don't even know if it's really people who make the world harder. It's just men. Like I've had to speak to so many men these past couple of weeks because there's so many men in real estate and so many male landlords, and I'm just like in real estate and so many male landlords and I'm just like, please, like, put a woman on the phone. Like I. I genuinely I just hate having to interact in any way with men in any way. I hate speaking with them, I hate walking past them on the street. I I just hate whenever they're in my space and like when I like I'm I'm dead ass right now. Like it's getting to the point where I'm like I should probably talk to somebody about this and it's it might be an issue, but I just literally, like anytime like I've had to talk to so many landlords, like on the phone or over text, and anytime they pick up the phone and it's a man, my heart immediately drops and I'm just like, oh God, I don't want to speak to men ever in my fucking life because they genuinely just make everything so much harder. Like the way that they explain things doesn't make sense. The way that they operate doesn't make sense. They're just so, they're so draining, like mentally they're I. I genuinely like I I don't ever want to speak to a man ever in my entire life like I. I want them to all go back to jupiter. There's no way they can get any more stupider. But I need them to all go back to jupiter and and leave us the fuck alone. Like literally, just leave. Leave us the fuck alone. Like, literally, just leave. Leave us the fuck alone.

Daijné:

It's just been a very interesting couple of weeks. My brain is all fucking scrambled again because I'm moving and there's just so many like moving parts and having to hire movers, like, oh, it's just been, it's just been incredibly a lot. And then also there's just a lot going on in the fucking world. Jimmy Kimmel show was just pulled from air and definitely because of remarks he made about charlie kirk. I say in quotes, because he didn't say anything about charlie kirk. He said when, from the clips that I've seen, what he said was that maga is trying to blame the alleged shooter on the left and say that he is this crazy left lunatic or whatever. But everything about the alleged shooter is crafted and from the right. He's allegedly a part of this group called Groypers I think is how you say it. I had never heard about this until last week when it came out that he was allegedly a part of this group and this group is a crazy, crazy alt-right group and they actually believe that Charlie Kirk is not right enough.

Daijné:

Like yo, what? Like there's just so much hate and violence and chaos in the world right now and it's all like I truly I blame Donald Trump and MAGA because they spew so much hate into the world Like there's just so much hate and violence and racism and all of this, and then they're surprised when all of that turns around and people are hateful and violent and like I'm just, like I, I don't understand it and then they'll. They'll do anything, anything but take accountability right wingers versus accountability. They're losing every fucking time. They're losing every fucking time. They'll never take accountability. They'll never own up to the literal, literal hate that they are spewing, and not even just hate, but violence.

Daijné:

Like they don't realize that the things that they're saying and doing are violent, or I don't know if it's that they don't realize that it's violence or if they don't care. I think it's more just that they don't care. They don't care about the violence until the violence starts to affect them, like this racist, hateful rhetoric that they spew is violence, it incites violence and it is violence. But they don't realize the violence unless someone's like shooting them in the neck for lack of better example. But it's like the words that you say. They matter and they're violent and they lead to more violence. Like they, I just don't understand how people don't understand that when you, when you say things that are hateful and violent, that is, that is the start of the violence.

Daijné:

We get to these major things, to this huge violence of shootings and things like that from the words that we say, from the ideologies and the beliefs that we spew to people like, how, how is it not clocking that when you, when you speak violence so much that violence is going to build into bigger acts of violence? Hello it just, it just blows my mind, it blows my mind and I just I can't. I'm not surprised by any of it, because I mean, this country was literally built off of violence and racism. That's another thing. I'm like seeing people being like, oh, violence is not the answer. Violence doesn't solve anything. I need us to be, I need us to be serious, I need y'all to be for real violence. Unfortunately, I'm not condoning this, I'm not saying that I agree with it. Violence has solved a lot. We live in america. We live in america. That violence has is literally threaded into the fucking american flag.

Daijné:

This country started from fucking violence. When christopher columbus came over here, he brought the violence fucking with him. It was immediate violence. Once they got here, like what are we talking about? And then, when they wanted independence from britain, hello the american revolution. Like they had to fight for that physically, when black people wanted to free ourselves from slavery, we had to fight for that like violence, unfortunately, has solved a lot of things, because people will not just leave other people the fuck alone.

Daijné:

I and I wish people would. I wish we would all just go to our respective corners. If you don't like me, cool, don't, don't bother me. But the way racism and and misogyny and homophobia and all of that works, y'all claim like Y'all don't like us, but you won't just leave us the fuck alone. You have to, like, try and make our lives harder, because you don't even truly, you don't even feel like we have the right to exist or that our lives matter or that we're like actual people who just want to live our fucking lives. So instead of just leaving us the fuck alone, you want to make our lives harder and then we have to literally fight for our fucking lives, like everything in the world just feels like a fight for our fucking lives and I'm just fucking tired of it. Are y'all not tired of it like? Oh, my god, I just wish everyone would just leave us the fuck alone. Just leave us alone. If you don't like me, cool, I, I could not give a fuck less, but then just leave me alone. Let me be like you don't like me to the point where you have to make my life miserable. And the reality is your life is fucking miserable and you hate yourself, but you're projecting that onto other people who are just trying to live their fucking lives because you won't just go talk to that lady and unpack. Why the fuck you're so fucking miserable, like I'm just fucking. I'm so tired. I'm so fucking tired of this shit show of a country.

Daijné:

Like they want to scream and cry about oh, free speech. And was that not jimmy kimmel's free speech? To call out the fact that this alleged shooter is a product of the right, like was that not him sharing his opinion? Mind you, they want to say things like racism, homophobia, misogyny, transphobia, xenophobia. All of that is just an opinion, and charlie kirk was just sharing his opinions and he was gunned down for sharing his opinion. But when it comes to people like Jimmy Kimmel speaking his opinion on the alleged shooter, now his show's been pulled from the air indefinitely. There was a literal website that was created by people who were doxing people who were, they said, were celebrating Charlie Kirk's death. They're uploading their personal information, like their jobs and their phone numbers and their addresses, to this website to hold them accountable and dox them like. This country is a fucking joke, bro. Everything's a fucking joke.

Daijné:

We live on a fucking floating rock and everyone, like people, are just making other people's lives harder just for the sake of making their lives harder, and I just I, like life does not have to be this fucking hard. Life does not have to be this hard, and I don't understand why people want to make it so hard. Like, just like, let me be. If you don't like me, cool, let me be. If you have an apartment for rent, great, let me have it. If you have an opening for a job, cool. When can I start? Like the world could be so much simpler.

Daijné:

But people just make it hard and I it's just so infuriating like life can already be so stressful trying to balance work life and your personal life and friendships and working out, and like all of it is already so incredibly stressful. But with this added stress of, like, trying to find an apartment, trying to find a job, then you got to worry about racism and homophobia, misogyny, like, oh, my god, mind you, we live on a fucking floating rock in the middle of space and none of it's real. All of it's. All of it is made up. All of it is made up literally just to make people's lives harder. I don't get it. I don't get it, and it's stressful and it's annoying and I just wish that everyone would shut the fuck up and leave everybody alone and just like, let people live anyway. That's my rant for today. I feel like this episode is probably all over the place. Life is all over the place right now and I just, I just wish people would just leave other people alone and like life could just be so much simpler. Life really could just be simpler and we, as people, make it harder and it just doesn't have to be. It doesn't have to be this hard life. Life could be simpler.

Daijné:

So I'm gonna stop ranting for today. Now I'm gonna go. Oh my god, I have to pack. Ranting for today now I'm gonna go. Oh my god, I have to pack. I hate packing. I wish my mom could come help me. Every apartment that I've ever packed up, my mom has helped me pack it up. This is the first time. Well, this yeah, this is this will be the first time that I don't have my mom helping me pack and, uh, I'm really sad about it. I hate packing and she's just so good at it, like mom's just no. I don't know how that happens, but mom's just no anyway. But I have to pack up everything, which is gonna be a pain in the ass, but we're all good, I say through a smile and a thumbs up when everything is in fact not good.

Daijné:

Thank you guys. So much for tuning in today to my rant. I hope everyone's having a good week, except for that orange drink, lady, and I will talk to you in the next episode. Peace and love. Talk to you later. The napkin in between, hosted by Daijné Jones, produced by Daijné Jones, post-production by Daijné Jones, music by Sam Champagne and graphics by Isma Vidal. Don't forget to like and subscribe. See you next episode.