A Year of The Podcast. What Happens Now...?

A birthday for Luna and a birthday for the pod should feel simple—cake, joy, gratitude—but sometimes milestones flip a light on in the corners you’ve been avoiding. I share how a scrappy pandemic rescue became my anchor through breakups, state lines, and long walks, then admit something harder: the show is a year old, we hit real milestones, and I’m still not as fulfilled as I want to be.

We trace where that feeling comes from. I talk openly about the energy shift when there’s another voice in the room, why the episode with a guest lit me up, and how solo episodes can turn into me vs. the timeline. Editing fatigue is real; long hours of cutting myself talking drains the spark I need for better research and sharper storytelling. I explore options on-air—recurring guests for richer conversations, a possible co-host, seasonal arcs, bringing on an editor, and reviving my personal YouTube channel for vlogs that scratch the visual-creative itch. The goal isn’t louder content; it’s clearer content that feels alive.

If you’ve ever hit a milestone and felt… off, this one will resonate. You’ll hear the tension between growth metrics and meaning, the case for building in public, and the power of formats that fit your creative DNA. I’m keeping the promise of transparency: I don’t have all the answers, but I’m committed to elevating the work and inviting you into the process—gear recs, guest ideas, topics you want deep-dived, all welcome. If you’re here for honest creative evolution, pull up a chair, scratch Luna’s ears, and help shape what comes next.

Subscribe, share with a friend who’s rethinking their creative path, and leave a review with one idea you want to hear us explore next. Your notes guide the next chapter.

Transcript

Intro

Speaker 0:02

Hello, hello. Uh-oh. Another yapper with the mic.

Luna’s Birthday And Origin Story

Growing Together Through Breakups And Moves

On Aging Pets, Gratitude, And Mortality

The Pod Turns One And Mixed Emotions

Seeking Fulfillment: Co‑Host Or Guests

Creators’ Block: Editing, Boredom, And Format

Considering YouTube, Vlogging, And An Editor

Transparency, Uncertainty, And Next Steps

Outro

Speaker 1 0:15

Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Napkin in between podcast. I am your host, Daijne. Jones. I hope everyone's having a good day except for that orange chick lady. Of course. Y'all, it is your second favorite Sagittarius's. Of course, I'm your first favorite Sagittarius. But it's your second favorite Sagittarius's birthday month and birthday week. And of course, I'm talking about my sweet angel baby dog Luna. Her birthday was this past week. She's looking at me right now because I said her name. Do you want to come up? Do you want to come say hi? Come on. Come on. It's the birthday girl. It's the birthday girl. It was my baby dog Luna's birthday this past week. Okay, I think your butt's like in the camera. Sit down. Sit down. Good girl. It was her birthday last week, and I've just been like thinking about this sounds like hella dramatic, but I've just been thinking about our lives together because she turned six and I got her when she was six months. Um at a very pivotal, pivotable, what am I saying? At a very pivotal time of my life, and I'm just like, it just feels like we really grew up together. Like, this is my baby. Like, I used to really side-eye white people when they would be like, Oh my god, my dog, like she's a part of the family, and da da da. I'm like, bitch, it's a fucking dog. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? I will say now white people are not right about a lot, okay? But even a broken clock is right twice a day. This is my daughter, like, this is my literal daughter. I literally gave birth to her. Like, I'll show you the ultrasounds and the sonograms. If you like, this is my daughter, like, this is literally my child. And so I've just been thinking about like our lives together and how I got her. Like, I've talked about it a little bit, so I won't get like super into it, but it was the height of COVID. It was July of 2020. I was actually looking back at pictures of of her, like when I first got her this past week because it was her birthday. She was so little, my little baby. But it was July 2020, and there was this man in the neighborhood that I lived in, and he's like knocking, going door to door, knocking on all my neighbors' doors, just being like, I have this dog, and if nobody takes her, like I'm gonna take her to a shelter. And I was like, like, let's relax, like, let's talk about this, like what like what's going on? Like, can I see her? What kind of dog is it? Blah blah blah blah. And so, you know, he showed me pictures of her, told me that she was six months old, and blah blah blah. And I was like, I'll take her. Like immediately when I saw photos of Luna, I was like, She's not going to a shelter, like I will take her. And he was just like, Okay, give me a hundred dollars, and I have the dog, I have her crate, and like dog food or something, and like a couple of toys, I think, and like a did she have a collar? She may have had a yeah, she had a collar too. Um, and so I gave him a hundred dollars and he gave me Luna and like all this stuff for her. And when I first got her, like I didn't realize like she was so tiny, like she was a puppy, she was six months, so she was like tiny in that way, but she was so fucking skinny, like you could see her bones like sticking out, or not her bones, but her ribs-oh, ribs are bones, so you could see her ribs like sticking out on her sides, and she was like bad as fuck, like bouncing off the walls. Whenever she got too excited, she would just pee, like it was it was crazy. But it like I said, it was the height of COVID. I was working from home, so I had the time to train her, and so it's really just been her and I for the past five and a half years. Like, technically, I got her when I was in a relationship with my ex, but we broke up like shortly after she's like, pet me, pet me, okay, baby, I'll pet you. Um, we broke up shortly after, like, we got her, maybe like maybe like six, seven months. No, maybe like a mmm, I don't know, it doesn't really matter. But we broke up a little bit after we got her, and it was like no question, like Luna was coming with me. Like, she's always been my dog, she's always gravitated towards me. I was one who trained her, like it was just no fucking question. And so, come in, baby. Um, I've just been looking back at our life together because like like I said, I got her at a very pivotal time of my life. I I keep wanting to say pivotable, that's not a word. I got her at a very pivotal time of my life where I was like starting to unpack my own anti-blackness and internalize racism, and like I said, like me and my ex had broken up, and you know, he had proposed to me and then cheated on me a month later. That's why we broke up conversation for another day. But like, through all the craziness, like we've been through two relationships, an engagement, uh, an ending of an engagement, three states, thousands of miles, and it's just like been me and her. And I just love that for us because that's my daughter. Like, of course, I love spending time with my daughter. So this has been the peak of my week, it's just like looking back on Luna's life, and it's crazy. I was on a walk with her the other day, and so this guy like stopped us, and he was like, Oh, she's so pretty, like she's beautiful, code, blah blah blah. Like, how old is she? Whatever, whatever. And I was telling him, like, oh, she's five, but like she'll be six in a couple of days. And he was like, Oh, you know, when a dog turns six, like that they're a senior, and I was like, Shut up, like Nuna. Sorry for the visual um watchers. I'm so sorry if you just got like a flash. Um, but I was like, shut up, like why men ruin everything. Why would you tell me that? Like, she's not a senior, she's my puppy little baby, and she's gonna be here forever, and she's not getting older. But it's so funny, like, I don't know if you guys can see for the visual people, but like her elbows are starting to get like gray, and I'm just like, oh my god. Oh, there's there's very few things that should be and are immortal to me, but the two things that are are my dog and my mom, like those are two things that are just never gonna ever like I'm always gonna have them, like they're never gonna do that D word, you know what I'm talking about. But like this is just my baby, and I'm so grateful for her. And uh having a dog is it's it's an amazing uh experience, but it's also like it's a lot of work, it truly is. But I I wouldn't change it for the world because this is my baby, and I just love her so much, and she just wants her belly wabbed. Oh she's perfect! So that has just been a peak of my week is just like reminiscing on our life together because it's just beautiful and I love it, and we've been through so much together, and you know, like I said, three states, two breakups, one engagement breakup, um thousands of miles, and it's just always been us, and I just love that for me. So that has been the peak of my week. Please tell me the peak of your week, something that made you song, kept you grounded, kept you sane, and the chaos of the world. Speaking of birthdays, it is also the pod's first birthday. How fucking crazy is that? Like a year ago, on the 20th, what was it, the 29th, December 29th, 2024 was the first day that I uploaded a podcast episode, and it was actually kind of crazy. Like, I've always wanted a podcast, I've always said that. And then one day I was just like, you know what? I'm just gonna get the equipment and I'm gonna just start a podcast. And and I started recording and started uploading, and you guys started finding me, and here we are a year later into the pod, and it's just like it's a really weird place, I feel like that I'm in right now, and I've been trying to like process how I feel, and like put a label on it. I feel like that's how I can really process things and really understand things. I'm a very logical person, and I need things to make sense in order for me to be like, okay, this is how we process that thing, but I feel like the only thing that I can say, or the only way that I can describe how I feel right now in regards to the pod and its first birthday, is I don't know. I genuinely like I I don't know how I feel because like I said, I've always wanted a podcast and I've always wanted this, you know what I mean? Just to like be able to share my thoughts and have a space where I can just talk about whatever I want to talk about, and you know, I love that you guys tune in every week, you guys tell me how much you've learned from the pod, and I'm learning things too just from like reading your guys' comments and things like that in the comment section of the podcast and everything. However, at the same time, I feel like I'm trying to like I've been looking at the past year and like where the pod goes from here and and you know everything like that, and I just I don't know. I I I don't know. I just all I can say is I don't know because I feel like while the pod is very fulfilling for me and while I I love it and you know I this is something that I again I've always wanted, I feel as though it's not as fulfilling as I feel like I want it to be, or like and I don't know if that's because like I need to do something different with the pod. I don't know if it's because I need to do something different entirely and and not do the pod anymore. I just don't know, like I I feel like I thought that I would feel more fulfilled with the podcast than I do, and that's not to say that I don't feel fulfilled, of course. I I definitely feel fulfilled like and I I love the pod, but I just feel like I want it to be different, and and then again, like I don't know if it's like I want the pod to be different or if I just want to do something, something else other than the pod. And I'm in a very weird place in my content creation journey right now because like I feel like I want to be doing more, but I just don't know what that more is. Like, part of me feels like, and I said this when I first started the pod. Like, when I whenever I thought about having a pod, because again, this is something that I've always wanted, I thought that I would have a co-host, you know what I mean? And I thought that I would have someone to like bounce these conversations off of, and that would be something that I had, and I've talked about this a little bit before, so I'm not gonna get too into it, but like there were a couple people who you know I was like, okay, you'll do it with me, like we'll be co-hosts, or and it didn't work out for whatever reason. And so I don't know if I just feel like I I would prefer a co-host. I feel like it would like make the episodes better. Like, I've only had one person on the pod before, Sam, who actually helped me start the podcast. She like sent me recommendations for the sound and all like the the audio thing. I don't even know what the fuck it's called, but it's the thing that makes the audio sound better. Like she helped me get all that stuff together. And like that was probably my favorite episode that I had filmed of the pod all year. Like, I loved having her on, and I loved being able to for us to have a conversation about you know her her ideas and my ideas and everything like that. And so I'm like, do I want a co-host? But then I'm like, I don't really know that I want a co-host because no shade, but like, uh, like I don't people, you know, like people, like I love of course everyone in my life, but it's like when you get to the point where you're like working with someone, like, oh, it makes it a little bit trickier. So I'm like, I don't know if like that's really what I want, or if I just want, you know, more people to come on as guests on the pod and you know, me be able to interview people, which I feel like would be really, really fulfilling as well. I don't know. Like, I just I just don't know. And then I also think like maybe I just want to go back to my personal YouTube channel and do vlogs. Like I've been looking at vlogging cameras, and maybe that's what I want to do, and it's just like you guessed it. I don't know. I don't know. I just feel like I want to be doing something different because I feel like I'm not doing like I I just feel like I'm not creating to my full potential. I think that's how I feel right now, and it's it's really frustrating to me, and it's giving me a lot of like anxiety, and I I don't know what I want to do. And I've one thing that I always known about any of my content is that I always want to be fully transparent and I f I want to tell y'all like what's going on up here for the audio listeners I'm I'm putting to my brain because it's freaking weird in there sometimes, like shit, like there's just too much going on, and I I think about too many things at once, and then I I I don't know, like I just get very confused and I get anxious, and I'm like, I feel like I want to be doing more, but I don't know what that more is. I don't know if it's with the pod, I don't know if it's with my personal YouTube channel, like I just I don't know, and I feel like another reason that I feel very just like what the fuck, like what what am I doing? Is like I hit a milestone on the pod. Like I of course I I told you guys about my Spotify rap, like I'm your bitch is international, you know what I mean? Like, which is crazy to me. But I also just became a YouTube partner, like I monetized on YouTube for the podcast, and that's low-key fucking me up too because it's like that's major, you know what I mean? Like, and and that's like it blew it's blowing my mind, like in less than a year I monetized my podcast, but now I'm just like I don't know, like I feel like I should feel happier with the pod, and I just don't, and I don't know if it's just because like I want to do something different with it or if I want to just end it, or I don't know. I also like my personal YouTube channel, like that was fun for me. I'm not saying the pod isn't fun, but like making those videos and adding my my special edits and different things like that on my personal channel, like that was fun. I loved doing that, and I feel like maybe that's why I feel this way about the pod, because like not only is it like it's just me yapping, which I know y'all don't mind, and I don't mind too, but I again I do wish that there was someone here that I could bounce these ideas off of, but also I just feel like it's boring, like I and no one has ever told me that the pod is boring, but like I'm just sitting here talking into a microphone in a camera, like oh my god, it's so boring. Like on my personal YouTube channel, I can add special effects, and you know, I add like funny memes or whatever, you know what I'm saying? And like with the pod, I don't do that, which is like obviously like who's doing that on a podcast? Like, this is this is what a podcast is, but I just feel like I'm bored. I think that's what it is. Like, I'm starting to feel bored with the podcast because I'm just sitting here by myself talking it into a microphone, and I I do wish that obviously, like, I'm not gonna start adding special effects and weird shit to the podcast because I don't feel like that's like the vibe of a podcast, you know what I mean? But I do wish that you know, because that's not really an option, or it feels like not an option to me, like I wish that there was someone here that was like co-hosting with me, or like I had people to interview or something like that. Maybe that's just what I need, you know what I mean? Maybe I just need to like invite people on the pod and and talk to people and interview them, and and I was supposed to have oh, I was supposed to have my friend, she was gonna come on the pod last week, but then I I wasn't feeling well, and you uh your girl was fucking oof, I was like really, really sick this past week, and so we ended up canceling because I didn't want to get her sick, of course, like with the holidays and traveling. I didn't want to get anybody else sick, so she didn't end up coming. But I was looking forward to that so much. Maybe that's just what I need to do. Maybe I just need to start trying to see if I can invite people on the pod and and interview them. But I don't know, I feel like I'm just not as fulfilled or as like I just it's it's not like I'm just bored. I feel like I'm bored, and and maybe it's all in my head, maybe it's just ang anxiety because the pod is a year old, so I'm thinking about it and thinking about like what we've done so far and what we could do in the future, and I'm just like damn, like I just want to do more, and I don't know if the more is with the podcast or if I go back to my personal YouTube channel and start making videos there. But I have been looking at vlog can vlogging cameras and and looking more into that because I do whether or not the pod continues, I do want to post on my personal YouTube channel as well. Um, because again, like that was really fun for me. Like I've found in the past specifically in the past year, because like I feel like whenever I post on TikTok or Instagram or whatever, like I there's not much editing with those videos. Like I kind of just talk to the camera and you know what I mean, like it's like a two to three minute video, whatever. But when it comes to like the podcast on my personal YouTube channel, like it's a lot more editing, and I have found that I fucking hate editing. I hate editing, and so I I like for it to be more fun, and so when I'm editing my personal YouTube channel videos, like those are fun to edit because I'm adding these special effects, and you know I'm saying, like, it's it's just a a funner, a more fun process. I don't know if funner is a word, I don't think it is. Um whereas when I'm editing the pod, I'm just like watching myself talk, and maybe that's what it is too, like maybe it's just that I need to find an editor. I don't know. Oh I don't know. I just feel like I wanna do something different. I I feel like this is boring and I don't like it. And the thing with my content is like again, none of you have ever said to me, like, oh, this is boring, but like my content, nobody like I feel like I make my content for me more than anyone else. And if I don't like it, then I'm just not gonna make it, regardless of if like a million people could be telling me, like, oh my god, we love this thing, but if like I don't like it myself, then I just I don't want to do it, I want to change it, I want to do something different. So I say all this to say this is like the craziest episode. Like, usually when people are like, Oh, it's the first birthday, they're like happier. That's what I feel like. I feel like, and maybe that's wrong too. Like, I shouldn't be comparing where I am or what I'm thinking to other people, but I just feel like this is a milestone, and I've hit this milestone along with other milestones in the past year, and I just don't feel how I want to feel so I want. To change it, but I don't know how or what to change, or I don't know. I I don't know, but I wanted to just in the spirit of full transparency, that is one thing that you will always get with any of my content. Like, I'm just trying to figure out what I want to do, and so I don't know what this means for the future of the pod. If if episodes are going to go up as frequently as they have been, if if they're not going to go up as frequently as they have been, I don't know. I really don't know. But when I know, I'll let y'all know. Um, I just wanted to let y'all know that I don't know what I'm doing, and I don't know what the future of all of this is, but I just don't feel the way that I want to feel, and I want to do something different. So yeah. I don't know if like this is like the craziest way to explain this, but I don't have the words because I don't know. I don't know, and I hate feeling this way. I hate I hate that I don't know, but I don't. And I just have to figure it out, and you guys are gonna come along with me on on my journey to figure it out. Like, I I can't, I'm not the type of person to like figure things out myself and then show y'all the final product, the final product. What am I saying? Um, I just want to be as transparent as possible. Like, something, I'm I'm missing something, and I don't know what that thing is, but I'm gonna figure it out and we're gonna figure it out together. And in the meantime, I am looking at vlogging cameras for my personal YouTube channel. So if anybody has any recommendations, please do leave those. That would be very, very helpful. Um, I don't know. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm excited for it. I'm a little bit uh scared, if I'm being completely honest, because I just I don't know, and I hate feeling like I don't know, but I I don't know. And I don't I don't know. I don't know. I feel like take a shot every time I said I don't know. Please don't you'll be at the hospital getting your stomach pumped. Through everything, I am very, very grateful that you guys are all here and tuning in and and along this ride with me. I feel like I just I want to change something and I gotta figure out what it is. And talking out loud helps me to like calm these thoughts in my head. I need I just needed to get them out and just let y'all know that there might be changes coming. I don't know what they are, but when I do know, I will let you know. Um if you would like to go subscribe to my personal YouTube channel because I do plan on, like I said, whether or not the pod continues and or whether or not like the schedule just changes or whatever it is, I do want to post more on my personal YouTube channel. So um, yes, be on the lookout for more content there. I just feel like I want to elevate, like I feel like my brand is very stagnant right now, and I feel like I'm I'm not doing bad, but I'm not doing as well as I could be in terms of like my content and creating my content and the content that I'm putting out. So I feel like I just need to do more, or I want to do not necessarily more, but like better. I just want to elevate, you know what I mean? And so that's that's what we're we're in right now. We're in this process of elevating and and seeing where we're going. So in any event, thank you guys all for being here. Not guys, I hate saying thank you, guys. Like, ew, why would a man be there? Thank you everyone for being here and just being along this ride with me. I don't know where we're going, but I promise I'll figure it out. And once I figure it out, I just feel like I want to do something else. Like, and again, I don't know if that means something else entirely of like not having the pod anymore, if it means something else, like something different with the pod. I don't know. But we're gonna figure it out, we're gonna figure it out, and I appreciate you guys all being here. Thank you so much for for just being here. Like the pod being one year old is fucking crazy to me. And I just like oh my god, like I love it, but I wanna love it more. Like I want I want to feel more fulfilled than I do. So yeah, change is coming soon. I hope it's soon. I don't know. I just feel like I'm I'm jumbled right now. But thank you guys all for being here. Happy first birthday to the pod. This is like the worst birthday party fucking ever because mama doesn't know what the fuck she's doing, but mama's gonna figure it out. Happy sixth birthday to Luna. She had a great birthday trust. She like we had so much fun. She had like a little cake and her her party hat, which she fucking hated. Ugh, Luna hates like wearing clothes or any sort of like hat with any like she just doesn't like it, but she she puts up with it for me. We'll take a couple pictures, and then she's immediately like ripping that shit off. But she had a great birthday. And um, again, thank you guys all for being here. I understand that this episode was kind of just like, bitch, what the fuck? But that's what's in my brain right now. Like, bitch, what the fuck? We just need to do more, we need to do something different, and I gotta figure out what that is. So thank you guys so much for tuning in to today's episode. I will figure it out, I promise. Um, I hope everyone's having a good week, except for that orange tank lady, and I will talk to you in the next episode. Peace in love. Talk to you later.

Speaker 26:07

The napkin in between, hosted by Daijne Jones, produced by Daiijne Jones, post-production by Daijne Jones, music by Sam Champagne, and graphics by Isma Vidal. Don't forget to like and subscribe. See you next episode.