The Law of Self-Preservation: Understanding and Realignment

In this episode, we’re diving into the Law of Self-Preservation—what it really means, how to recognize when you’re out of alignment, and practical ways to reclaim your energy and peace. You’ll learn how to set boundaries, prioritize rest, and make choices that honor your well-being. Tune in to shift from survival mode to thriving with intention.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Understanding the Law of Self-Preservation
• 3:00 Recognizing Healthy vs. Unhealthy Self-Protection
• 5:45 Strategies for Reclaiming Self-Preservation
• 8:53 Building a Support Ecosystem for Well-Being

Transcript

Welcome back, shapeshifters. Today's episode is all about the law of self-preservation, what it really means, how to understand it, how to reclaim it to create more energy and peace in your life. You are going to learn how to set boundaries, prioritize rest, and make choices that are really going to support your own well-being. So first off, what is this law of self-preservation? What is it?come from, what does it mean? So if you listen to my Afro-Indigenous cosmologies episode, and if not, I would recommend you go back and do it. You will learn that there are universal laws. These are the laws of the universe. For example, as above, so below. The law of like attracting like. These are things that the ancients in studying the universe and studying the cosmos and the way that the universe works, we're able to deduce what they call universal laws that are undisputed. are adopted by science. They are also adopted by certain spiritual traditions. And so today we're going to talk about one of them, the law of self-preservation.

And what is the law of self-preservation? Self-preservation is the innate instinct that everything alive has to protect its physical, emotional, and psychological well-being. That there is an innate instinct within all of us to protect ourselves. And so that you can go off out into the savanna and not have prey that want to hurt you or want to eat you. It's just not something that we see in nature. And we know that nature is our teacher. So how do we then apply that to our day-to-day lived experience? So the first thing is to be able to recognize healthy self-preservation from unhealthy self-protection. Healthy self-preservation is going to allow you to mitigate any threats to your physical, emotional, and psychological body through healthy choices that are gonna allow you to thrive. Unhealthy self-protection really comes more from fight or flight. It's when we get locked into a level of fear and that fear becomes a cage that limits our ability to make expansive choices. It also limits our ability to grow and creates this illusion of safety. So we don't want to create an illusion of safety. We want to be able to mitigate and protect ourselves spiritually, psychological, and emotionally in a way that's going to allow us to thrive. So the first thing is how do we recognize where we're at? How do we recognize if we're in a place of unhealthy self-protection versus healthy self-preservation. So some signs that you're out of alignment with self-preservation. Physically, are you prone to illness? Are you having difficulty sleeping? Are you having chronic fatigue? You're always tired. Also, emotional indicators. Do you have a lot of nervousness, a lot of physical anxiety, a lot of fear of the future. When you think about the world, do you always go to a place of worst case scenario or best case scenario? What are your behavioral patterns? Do you find yourself in a place of people pleasing? Do you view others as threats or do you view them as opportunities? Do you have an inability to even set boundaries for yourself? Also looking at what some of the cognitive signs, what's going on in your head, how do you talk to yourself? Do you have constant negative self-talk, negative self-doubt? As a big one is finding the catastrophe in everything that your brain literally goes, it can't maintain a place of neutrality. You go to an extreme of what could happen, a catastrophe happening rather than going to an opportunity. What are your relationship markers? Do you find yourself in a lot of codependent relationships? Do you find yourself in toxic relationships? Do you find yourself in patterns of relationships where even though it's a different person, you're still learning the same pattern over and over. It's almost like you keep attracting the same type of people into your life. These may be signs that you are out of alignment with your own ability to maintain self-preservation. So let's talk about some ways to get back into alignment. So tip one is establishing clear boundaries. You have to be willing to say no.

And as one of my sisters said, this is my say no era. Say no to what does not work for you. But you only know what does not work for you if you have a level of self-awareness over what's going on in your body, what's going on in your mind. Comes back to that emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is going to allow you to set boundaries. It's going to allow you to say no. It's going to allow you to have difficult conversations with other people and not feel regret or shame or like you did something wrong. It's gonna allow you to listen to the pushback of others, but stay firmly grounded in what you need. Also creating your radical self care plan. And I use the word radical because often we think of self care, it's like, you know, getting a massage or getting a mani-pedi and those things are not bad, but I mean a real radical self care plan. So for example, when you find yourself in heated times, when you find yourself under tension, what do you go to? What are those things that you know are going to anchor you back that are going to help you regulate your nervous system? Being able to know them, being able to call upon them. Maybe there's a playlist of music that you know is going to ground you. Maybe there's some stones. Maybe you need to take a few breaths. Maybe you need to take time off between high impact times in your life, maybe the day before or the day after, building in those rituals to your daily, monthly, seasonal practices that you know that you can go to when you have anxiety. If there's certain things that make you feel nervous, don't walk into them willy-nilly. Protect yourself. Buoy up. Pray yourself up. Put on that certain color. Play that song and get that dance and that energy out. Role play with a girlfriend before you go to that interview so you can get it all out. And also knowing that sometimes we need different interventions for different seasons and different times in our life. You are the grand architect of your life. Design it. Also recalibrating your own inner compass. Making choices that are going to be leveraging. As I say, the domino hits the next domino that hits the next domino things that are going to empower you and that are going to be supportive, releasing obligations that don't serve you. Sometimes that recalibration process means you need to take a break. Sometimes that recalibration process means you need to be very, very diligent for 30 days or 60 days or 90 days, knowing that part of the recalibration is trying new things and knowing that sometimes things are temporary. What's going to work for you for one season and be part of your plan or your recalibration may not work all year long. So being able to have the awareness in the moment and to be able to then manage around that need. Also creating a support ecosystem. Being able to know these types of relationships are draining and these types of relationships are optimal getting support through counseling, life coaches, support groups, affinity groups, other people who are maybe challenged with similar things. None of us are able to be successful alone. And so we have to learn how to ask for help without shame. We have to be able to call in others and call upon others who really can be a value add in our life. So if you have people that are draining your energy and then you're going to them to ask for help, they've already shown you who they are. Find the people in your life that are truly going to support you. And if that means professional help, don't be ashamed. And again, if we look at nature as our teacher, we see that even in nature, even the plants, the animal kingdom, we all are in a co-creative relationship with the environment. So that's what I have for you today, Shapeshifters, understanding the importance of self-preservation, that the first thing that you have to do is put the oxygen mask on yourself to fill your cup first. And all the work that you're doing in community, in your family, in your home, in your relationships is going to be from a place of the overflow. We were not put here to be eaten, to be beaten, to be taken advantage of we are here to protect ourselves and we don't have to feel guilty about that. No one gets to impose their guilt upon you because you are only going to show up as your highest self when you are giving and preserving to yourself to know that all the other laws of nature start with that one law. And so this idea that we are supposed to be human doings, giving our own powerful energetic currency out to everyone around us and leaving nothing for ourselves is not the way of the ancients and not the way of the universe. So your homework today is to take a moment and take some time to think about one small step that you can take to enhance and optimize your own self-preservation. Until next time, keep shifting.