It's the absolute worst feeling being stuck in a loop. You know exactly what you want to do. You see the opportunity, but you keep talking yourself out of it. You fall back into the same comfortable, safe patterns. Let's be real about this. It feels like a huge failure of motivation, but it's not. That crushing feeling of being stuck is actually just fear doing its job a little too well. We're going to break down how that fear keeps you trapped and tools you can use right now to interrupt the cycle and finally move forward.
Hi, and welcome to Block Out the Noise, a space to quiet the noise of anxiety, self-doubt, and overthinking. I'm Jessica Davis, licensed therapist, mindset coach, and the creator of the Courage Method. I specialize in helping teens and young adults build confidence and courage. If you want something you can use the moment anxiety shows up, the free anxiety survival toolkit is in the show notes. It gives you clear steps to stay grounded when your thoughts start to race. Also, before we dive in, remember, this podcast is here to support and guide you, but it is not a replacement for talking to someone in real life. If you're struggling with your mental health, please reach out to a therapist. And if you're in crisis, contact emergency services or a local helpline. You don't have to go through it alone.
This is part two of our conversations about fear. Part one focused on how fear grows when you avoid it and how judgment keeps you frozen. Now we are going deeper into the patterns fear creates and what helps you break them. Many of the ideas in this episode build from the interview that I mentioned in part one with Alex Hermozzi. He talked about patterns, habits, and why people stay in the same place even though they want something different. Even though he was talking about business, the behavior patterns he described match what I see in teens in young adults with anxiety every day. So I pulled the parts that matter for your mental health and shape them for what you're going through. If you missed part one, you can listen after this. And if you want the full interview of Alex Hermozzi with Jay Shetty, it is linked in the show notes. Let's start with something
important. Your brain is wired to notice threats before possibilities. It is designed to spot danger quickly, which is helpful in survival situations, but overwhelming when anxiety takes over. When you live with anxiety, this system works overtime. You walk into a situation and your brain jumps straight to the threat. What if they judge me? What if I fail? What if I embarrass myself? What if I regret it? Fear wants the smallest possibility of danger to feel like the biggest truth. This is why we stay stuck. Your brain thinks stillness keeps you safe, but stillness also keeps you in the same place. Here is your first shift. When you notice your mind jump to the worst story, pause and ask, what else could be true? This does not force positivity. It introduces balance. Fear hates balance because balance weakens the story it is telling
you. In episode one, we talked about how fear grows when you avoid it. Now we're gonna go one layer deeper. You repeat behaviors that once protected you. Avoiding things helped you feel safe. Staying quiet kept the peace. Holding back saved you from embarrassment, and not trying protected you from judgment. At one point, those strategies worked. They gave your brain relief. Relief feels like reward. So your brain repeats the pattern. Avoid, freeze, shut down, delay, do nothing. Feel relief, repeat. This is the loop. A loop fear created, a loop your brain learned, a loop your brain thinks is helping you. You are not stuck because something is wrong with you. You are stuck because your brain is following an old instruction manual that no longer serves you.
If it was learned, the good news is it can be unlearned. If it was reinforced, it can be replaced with something new. Fear creates the same outcome because you keep feeding it the same input, same avoidance, same hesitation, same silence and same pattern. When nothing changes, nothing changes. Hermosy said, people repeat the same actions and expect new results. This is exactly what anxiety does. It convinces you to repeat old behaviors while hoping something new will happen. But change needs one thing: a new input, a new action, a new response, not a huge leap, not a whole transformation, just one step that interrupts the pattern. This is where momentum starts. There is another reason you stay stuck in the same loop.
Fear does not only protect you from danger, it protects your identity. Ramosy talked about this in a really powerful way. People avoid change because the action they need to take conflicts with the identity they are used to living in. Think about it this way: you want to be someone who applies for the job, but you also want to avoid judgment. You want to be someone who tries new things, but you also want to stay safe from rejection. You may want to be someone who speaks up, but you also want to avoid disappointing other people. These identities clash and fear steps in to protect the older one, the quieter one, the safer one, the version of you that survived the past. So when fear stops you, it's not only protecting you from danger, it's protecting you from becoming someone new. But growth always requires a small identity shift, right? Not a new personality, not a new version of you, but just a new
belief that says, I am someone who tries, I am someone who learns. I am someone who is moving forward. Hermosy talked about friction in a simple but honestly important way. If an action feels hard to start, your brain is less likely to do it. So the goal is to lower friction and stack small wins. This is how you break the loop. Not by forcing yourself to leap, not by pushing through fear with willpower, but by making the first step so simple, your brain cannot talk you out of it. If applying for jobs feels overwhelming, your first step is not the application. Your first step might be opening your resume. If social situations feel scary, your first step might be sending one message to someone you trust. If starting a project feels too big, your first step might be writing one sentence or setting a two-minute timer. Small wins build momentum. Momentum builds confidence, and confidence creates more action. This is how you shift the loop without repeating the old identity fear is trying to protect. All right, so here's your courageous moment for the week. Name the loop you keep repeating. Name the identity fear is protecting, then lower the friction and choose one small action that breaks that loop. Not making gigantic steps, just the next step. Your brain learns through experience. So give it a new experience.
I really truly hope that this episode helped you and resonated with you. And if it did, please share it with someone who feels stuck in a cycle that they want to break. And I want to remind you, you are not behind, you are not broken. You are learning how to work with your brain instead of fighting it. Thank you for listening. Thank you for choosing growth even when it feels uncomfortable. Until next time, keep moving forward, trust yourself, and never forget you have what it takes to block out the noise.