When Closed Doors Lead to Your Purpose: Stephanie Matthews' Journey

What if the doors that never opened for you were actually protecting you from a path that wasn't truly yours? Stephanie Matthews spent 22 years as a photographer, constantly pushing against barriers that wouldn't budge despite her talent and connections. It wasn't until she founded A Tribe for Jazz that she realized those decades weren't wasted—they were divine preparation.

Stephanie's story begins with a trumpet, played in middle school bands where she discovered her natural gift for collaboration. Years later, as her father faced illness, she picked up a camera to document and understand him. His parting words—"go live your dream"—launched her into photography, a career that took her from New York fashion studios to dance halls across America. Despite her success, something was missing. Those closed doors weren't failures; they were redirections.

The pandemic forced a reckoning that revealed her true purpose. Through A Tribe for Jazz, Stephanie has created something revolutionary—using jazz not just for entertainment but as a catalyst for transformation, education, and healing. "I've accomplished more impact in these four years than I did in 22," she shares, highlighting how perfectly her past prepared her for this present.

What makes this conversation so powerful is Stephanie's insight about recognizing when seasons end. "You have to know when the forces are telling you it's time to move on," she cautions. "It can be dangerous mentally when you overstay a season." Her wisdom about giving ourselves grace in whatever season we find ourselves offers profound comfort to anyone questioning their journey.

Ready to reframe your seeming detours as divine preparation? Listen now, and discover how your past might be perfectly preparing you for a purpose beyond what you've imagined. Then share your own story of unexpected preparation with us—we'd love to hear how closed doors led you to open windows.

Transcript

Introduction to Stephanie Matthews

Speaker 2 0:16

Welcome to the SheSweet Society, a community where women from all backgrounds come together to share their stories, support one another and reveal the unfiltered reality of your lives. I'm your host and Empower Mercerpa Delia, and this podcast exists to give voice and space to women whose experiences might otherwise go unheard. Today, I'm joined by Stephanie Matthews, a founder of A Tribe for Jazz, whose story beautifully illustrates that sometimes what feels like preparation is actually your purpose unfolding in its own time. Stephanie's journey from trumpet player to photographer, to arts leader spans decades of what she now recognizes as divine preparation for the work she was meant to do.

Speaker 2 0:57

What makes Stephanie's story so compelling is her honesty about pushing against doors that wouldn't open during her 22-year photography career and her eventual revelation that those years weren't wasted. They were preparation. As someone who picked up a camera to document her father during his illness and received his permission to go live your dream, stephanie embodies the courage it takes to pivot when life forces a shift. Through A Tribe for jazz, she's created something revolutionary, using jazz not just for entertainment but as a catalyst for transformation, community building and healing. Whether you're someone pushing against closed doors, wondering if your path makes sense or trying to understand how loss can become purpose. Stephanie's journey offers wisdom about trusting the process and giving yourself grace.

Speaker 1 1:46

I did some research on you. I took a deep dive on you. You started a tribe for jazz, but you're a photographer and you're just everywhere. So you're a powerful woman in the scene of music and in the scene of art and I'm beyond honored to be to know you and to have you on the podcast.

Speaker 3 2:10

Stop, I don't even see it that way. Oh my gosh, you're very kind. Thank you for those warm words. I appreciate you. Thank you, dahlia, so excited to learn.

Speaker 1 2:18

Sure I'm happy to share. How did you get to find your love of music?

Speaker 3 2:24

Well, I think it started. So I picked up the trumpet back in oh gosh, this was middle school. So I think it started maybe then being at my grandmother's house after school, taking the bus down there, and there was always jazz playing and we listened to all types of music. You know, music is such an important part, I think, of everyone's lives and we all have our soundtrack to our lives. And I started playing an instrument because I love Louis Armstrong, I love the trumpet and so, and then my brother picked it up too, but anyway, I carried it all the way through high school and I didn't do anything with it afterwards.

Speaker 3 2:56

But the thing that was the biggest takeaway for me from being in marching band and ensemble and all those things was the collaboration, and that's what helped forge who I am now. I tell everybody I'm a natural collaborator. It is literally baked into who I am and what I do, and I think that's why it makes it a lot easier for me to form partnerships, because we're building community, we're building community, we're collaborating, let's work together, let's figure out what that looks like, and I think that's harder for some people to do, but for me it just kind of always came naturally because that's what I took out of the music piece. So a little bit different than maybe what you were expecting in terms of an answer, but that's.

Speaker 1 3:35

I wasn't expecting anything. That's very, very cool. Did you grow up around here?

Speaker 3 3:40

Where did you grow up? Columbus? Yeah, so I was born in Houston. We moved here in 79 and a group on the East side lived in Berwick, went to Eastmore, went to Johnson park, went to Eastmore, uh, left and went to the university of Toledo. Thought I was going to study business. Couldn't get past statistics, oh my.

Speaker 1 3:59

God.

Speaker 3 4:00

And they were like, um, maybe you might want to make a change. So I thought I was going to be this international business woman and it's so funny. But I moved over to arts and sciences and communications and so I actually got a degree in radio and television broadcasting Wow, yes, and I love public speaking and I loved all of that. So it's funny because I get to use all those skills now.

Speaker 1 4:18

You do. It always comes full circle, like once you go to school there's always a class or two or a professor that'll put you off the path, but then you end up in that industry anyway, somehow Yep, or using those skills, 100% Nothing's wasted.

Speaker 3 4:32

Nothing's wasted. Wait a minute.

Speaker 1 4:33

Public speaking Cause. I did also see that too. You do keynote speeches, you do. You do that kind of everywhere, Um and every month.

Speaker 3 4:41

I've seen you were a panelist last month I was a panelist for Columbus Chamber. That was the inclusion series and that was around workplace wellness and well-being. It's funny I haven't done as many public speaking engagements as I would like and I think this is the year where it's going to start picking up and into 26. I did kick off the year doing a keynote down at Ohio University, which was an honor. I had never done a closing keynote and it was great. It was a really wonderful moment and I got to share my story. But it was all about creative resilience and so I did talk about my life moving from an entrepreneur owning our family's business to being a photographer, to moving into arts leadership and how.

Speaker 3 5:22

Again that idea of we do these things, our paths, look weird or different to us. You know what I mean and we're wondering sometimes are other people's paths kind of like? You know a little bit here, a little bit there, but it all connects. I like to view it as an interconnected web and again, when you think spiritually, nothing truly is wasted. You may not know when you're going to use it, but it always comes back up.

Speaker 1 5:44

At least that's been my experience Same here, you just never, and it's kind of beautiful how it happens. It really life, really is art in so many ways. Do you have siblings?

Finding Purpose Through Music

Speaker 3 5:57

Yes, two brothers I'm in the middle. My older brother passed away four years ago. My younger brother happily married children, beautiful family. And yeah, so I'm a baby girl and I was born on Father's Day, which was a daddy's girl too, but I love my role as a daughter.

Speaker 1 6:15

And you're very close with your family.

Speaker 3 6:17

I am, dad, passed away in 05. But my mother, god bless her. She just turned 79 last month and well, she's my twin. If you ever saw us together, people get us confused and I'm like, but there's this massive age gap, but she looks so good, flawless, and I'm like that's where I'm headed, so it's good, but she's my girl, my favorite girl. So are you close to your parents too?

Speaker 1 6:39

Both of my dad passed. Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, it's okay, it's part of you talk about resilience.

Speaker 3 6:47

And for me that was the most pivotal moment.

Speaker 1 6:48

I've had two kids and they're my reason, but I found the rock in myself from losing mine, and so my mom was my rock, was my person, and so losing her was, for me, that most pivotal moment in my life, where choices are going to be made now, because you've got one life to live and, to your point, you don't want to waste it living a path that you think you should be living. You need to go find your path that you're supposed to be living, based on you, and none of that looks the same, and I think a lot of people get sucked into following what everybody else is telling them they should be doing instead of pursuing their own. What you've done and what you've cultivated with the Tribe for Jazz, with your photography, with your speaking, you literally are embodying and living that soul purpose, that life's purpose. How beautiful that is. I just want to know how did you have a moment like that, where it was like choices are going to be made, you're going to have to pivot now?

Speaker 3 7:49

Talia, you're going to make me cry. I can't believe this. I love that. What a natural and wonderful segue.

Speaker 3 7:54

So my dad died in 05, right, and before he passed, because I was his caregiver. Before he passed, he said Stephanie, it's time, go and live your dream. That was the permission I needed, right? But let me back up a little bit. A couple of years before, when he was first diagnosed, I picked up the camera and that was the first time I took to the camera. I knew a number of documentary photographers. We're still talking about film now. We're still talking about the film age.

Speaker 3 8:18

We had not made a transition into full digital and I wanted to document my father as a way of understanding him as a man and as a person. And I was looking for something and I don't know what it was and sometimes I question whether or not I found it, but I do know it pushed me into my purpose. It was the start. That question whether or not I found it, but I do know it pushed me into my purpose. It was the start. And so I had started shooting just everybody and everything, and I did this photo exhibit before he died and I self-financed it, and one of the things. He said. It was called Simply Beautiful a portrait essay of women. So I photographed and black and white photos of all these women that I knew, different age ranges, cultures, everything, and they did these little short stories about themselves, moments in their lives and poetry, and had everything framed up and done up and did a show.

Speaker 3 9:02

And my dad's walking around and we're standing there and he's looking at one of the pieces, because he was a very analytical mind Chemical engineering came from that background and he says I don't understand it, but I like it. That was it. That's all I needed. He didn't know because he wasn't wired creatively like that, but he was like I like it. And so then, when he gave me permission to go and live my dream, I was off to the races. I lived in New York for a while at the beginning of my career and when I was there I was doing an internship. I was a 33 year old intern working for a celebrity fashion photographer. It was wild.

Speaker 3 9:37

Oh Running around running around the city. Yes, it wasn't quite, devil Wears Prada, but it was it feels it's giving.

Speaker 1 9:44

Devil Wears Prada. That's what it's giving. Was it kind of? Is that what you used?

Speaker 3 9:49

to do A 33-year-old intern. No, it's funny because you already have ideas and opinions. You know what I mean. It wasn't like you know. I need to know what the I knew anyway. It's a long story, but long story short. When I was there I first started. I pushed away from fashion because I didn't want to step into that world. I was interested in beauty, I was interested in portraiture, I was interested in dance, and so photographing dancers all over the country actually was a very healing experience for me, and I did a series called the Every Woman Series, the Red Thread, and then there was another one called Life Cycle and Movements, which both were gallery shows.

Speaker 1 10:25

How do you come up with these names in these the?

Speaker 3 10:29

work shows.

Speaker 1 10:29

Yeah, I know, I was scrolling through some of it and it was just so beautiful. I'm like how the Red Thread that really speaks to me. Can you talk a little bit about that?

Speaker 3 10:39

Yeah, so at that time I was, I had always been close to the Lord and had always been in church and a very spiritual person. But the red thread for me, I was looking for that through line to other people, that connective tissue, and we are all interconnected and I don't know it has something to do with that and just, you know, seeking true community, trying to understand people more. You know, when you're living in New York you're surrounded by millions of people but it can be very lonely and you know it gives you a lot of time to think about who you are in the midst of all of that. And then I was searching for all of that and then also, too, who was my identities? My dad was gone.

Speaker 1 11:20

So you know, Was he your rock then yeah, daddy was yeah. In a lot of ways.

Speaker 3 11:25

In a lot of ways, absolutely, absolutely.

Speaker 1 11:28

Oh, it shakes you. It does, because it's almost like actually being born again. It actually feels that way, trying to understand who you are without that pillar being there, and who are you to the world, who were you to them, and what's it's so beautiful about. For me, anyway, the concept of love is, whether they're here or not, that love is real and that love is still here and you are still you. If you're anything like me which possibly you are, maybe I don't know You're amazing.

Speaker 1 11:58

We'll see, well, thank you. What it forced me to do was lean more into that, more into. They loved me so hard. That means I need to love myself just that same way. Who am I to put up with X, y, z? That's external. They don't love me that way I I need to be. Is that what you did too?

Speaker 3 12:17

you know what it's. I think that's a great point. It took me a while to get there. Um, which I don't know, it sounds like with you you had kind of like that, really immediate understanding and no, no, no bottom okay, oh no, I went to some dark places and music is great.

Speaker 3 12:32

We have that connection, then we definitely are the same. Yeah, um, that's that. I love the way you phrased that. I had never quite thought of it that way. But I will say, after losing dad, being in New York, coming back home and looking at my career here and just traveling as I needed to, I started doing a lot of deep work, and so I did start to uncover a lot within that time and I you know now that I think of it. There were some moments I do think were rock bottom, where I just was not taking good care of myself. You know my mind and my spirit and just all of it. But yeah, their love carries us through. It's that's I got to spend some time with that.

Speaker 1 13:11

That's good. Their love is what helps, because you'll get to have some moments where you have of course we do. We're all human. We have the self-doubt what are we doing here, what am I doing with whatever it is For me possibly this podcast and the speaking and everything else that I do and you just wonder and what I have found is sitting in that love is what keeps me going regardless.

Speaker 2 13:36

It's nothing though.

Photography as Divine Preparation

Speaker 1 13:37

You can do whatever it is that you want, because you are love, you are them, you are and you are still here, and the least you can do is live that way for you and for them, because they wouldn't want you to do anything different. Well said, well said. That's how it is and unfortunately I feel, like the club of us, I have lost the rocks. You can almost spot them in public. You can spot them very easily. How is that? I don't even know if it plays. It probably doesn't. Maybe Plays into your connectivity. When you're going out, you do connect so well. I saw like you have so many people that want to support your cause. You, everything that you do connect so well. I saw like you have so many people that want to support your cause, you, everything that you do. But I mean, it's obvious, people meet you. It's pretty obvious. Do you find that that feeds into it, onto how you connect with people?

Speaker 3 14:29

I think so. How could it not? How could it not? You know, I think it's part of you know, just part of my foundation, it's part of who we are. You know, in think it's part of you know, just part of my foundation, it's part of who we are, you know, in our connective tissue and so you know, for me, this, this idea, you know, in business and in in in the world, there's so much transactional, there's so much transaction based stuff. You know, and I'm like let's, let's. I love building the relationships and I may get pushed back from people who are like board members and things like that. You know, like you know because you know, but I'm like no, I the. The relationships that I'm building are deep and firm and they're rock solid.

Speaker 3 15:04

And I've built a network in the last four years through a tribe for jazz that I mean I had a. I had a wonderful network of of collaborators and creatives and clients when I was a full-time photographer. This is on a whole different level, building community. It is completely different and I love it. I love it. I want to tell you something. I feel like this is a wonderful space to share this, so I do a lot of sitting on my back patio, especially when the weather's cool, like it was like the last couple of weeks, and I do journaling and I'm talking to the Lord and just kind of working through some different things.

Speaker 3 15:40

And I had these questions about my life, the 22 years that I was in photography, and I found the revelation that came was is that it was a time for me to play and to explore and to create, and I had this amazing grace over my life and I feel like I always have, and I'm so, I'm so, very thankful and I got to travel everywhere and meet all of these wonderful people and it was, it was fun, it was, it was wonderful, right, yeah, but it was also preparation. Because I'm going to tell you something, no matter how hard I tried and I did, I was guilty of striving, you know, to some degree when I was working in photography, to get to that next level. Those doors wouldn't open and I mean, people could call, people at the top could call you know, and make a real time, you know, say, hey, I'm sending so-and-so over, and that happened and those stores still were not open, and so it took years being out of it, right, and just most recently to realize that whole cycle, that whole time of my life, was preparation. It was all preparation for what I stepped into when I came into Tribe for Jazz. All of it, I get to use all of it. It was all the readying, the resilience building it was. You know.

Speaker 3 17:05

Some people might say, okay, well you know, it was just, you were developing, it was business development. Nope, it was something more.

Speaker 3 17:10

It was something more, because everything that's happened in these last four years, I've done more. Let me say this I've done more and been able to accomplish more in terms of impact in these four years than I did in 22. And that's the reality. And that's the reality. Crazy, but it's good, though it's good, so good.

Speaker 1 17:30

No, I love that you said that, because there's so many people, myself included, that keep just trying to bulldoze through things and they just what? Are they made of steel? Like the doors just don't open and you think you start to think there's something wrong with you, like what is it about me? That is not allowed. Like you have the talent, you have the network, you have the content, but it just won't work because it wasn't supposed to. It wasn't supposed to. Because it wasn't supposed to.

Speaker 3 17:54

it wasn't supposed to this wasn't supposed to, and you know what? Because I'm like, oh and when? I, when I had that revelation of that part right there that it wasn't supposed to, you talking about, like you know, you're talking about perfect peace and like inner peace. So you're like, oh, okay, and then I'm like, yep, but wow, what an experience. Though. And and what's crazy is because it, because it was 22 years, yeah and um, for me, I, you know, I I think the Lord is funny because I'm like you, let me dabble off and do all this stuff in two years.

Speaker 3 18:31

I'm out there and I'm doing, you know, and people are like they thinking you know, you're in New York all the time, or I'm overseas, or whatever you know. And and at some point it actually became work and that wasn't fun, and when the joy started leaving it. And there's something very interesting. I've tried to tell people you have to be very careful about overstaying a season in your job, in your profession, in whatever you're doing. You have to know when the forces are telling you it's time to move on. It can be very dangerous mentally, psychologically, because that's when it's almost like the grace isn't over that part anymore. And that started happening where I was like okay, yeah, and then the pandemic happened, and then that was the shift.

Speaker 1 19:15

For you. Okay, it was the pandemic that forced you. That's the thing. If you don't listen I'm a terrible listener in my own signs I'm going to keep going. What do you mean? I got to stop. It takes a pandemic to shut everything down. It will force you to shift, it'll force you to look at things a different way and then get creative. Because what do you do when your whole I don't want to say your whole identity, but a good chunk of your identity and standing of work, was in one career path, yep, and you no longer can pursue. Well, you still do it, I'm sure, but you can no longer pursue that fold, do you?

Speaker 3 19:56

still Not, really, not, really.

Speaker 1 19:58

I don't.

Speaker 3 19:59

Yeah, Okay, I've got a client. I've got one client coming up, but I don't advertise. I don't push that anymore because and this will likely be one of my last shoots that I do because I just it's not there anymore for me. I've moved on. I did that.

Speaker 1 20:16

I did that, yeah, and now you're, you're just, you're doing so, you're doing so much with that and you're right. You're so right A lot of the times, all those things it's preparing you for. But so interesting, those people look at it so differently. You're the first person I heard that said what I thought. But you know, we always have that really evil person in the back of our head saying, well, it wasn't preparing, you were just, you didn't know, just weren't good enough, like whatever. Tell that girl to shut up and keep moving. Tell her to shut up.

Speaker 3 20:45

Cause I'm telling you, cause a lot of times it was, it was wild. It was to the degree where I look back on it now and I'm like it's so obvious, it's so obvious. Looking back on it, I'm like, oh, stephanie, you were just a knucklehead pushing forward, just bulldozing, trying to bulldoze it forward, and I'm like, but there were clear signs, there were clear signs and so, yeah, yeah, and if we leave when we're supposed to, we weren't even supposed to experience some of those pains. That's true. That's why you got to know when to go.

The Power of Divine Timing

Speaker 1 21:16

You do got to know when to go and if you overstay, though, I think you still learn things 100%. I don't think that any move you make, I think everything you do in your life is literally preparing you for something, but it will force you out, and you're not wrong on that. It will force you to move. It still hurts, it's still painful when you make the shift, because I don't know anybody that has change happen and it's just glorious like literally everything's like birth. Every birth is painful but beautiful. It's a new thing, right, pain but beauty. Beauty and pain pretty, pretty synonymous. We'll talk about just a little bit about what you're doing with with the jazz efforts, because Z there's a residency here. Is that right?

Speaker 3 22:02

Are you talking about? What are you talking about which post? We do do a residency, yeah, we do. Well, when we're in season with our concert season, yeah, last year we had a residency. We had Tyrone Allen from Brooklyn and then George Delancey, two bassists. This year is going to look a little bit different, but we have our Columbus International Jazz Series. We have Jazz Lab, which is in the education space. There's Exploration, which is around emotional wellness. We've got the new NAP concert coming up and that's something that we're stepping into. That space we like to use music.

Speaker 3 22:35

Music is an incredible catalyst and jazz most certainly because of its properties. Let me say it this way I don't want to get caught up in the neuroscience. I do want to talk about the neuroscience, but jazz as a genre is the original American art form, absolutely incredible. Birth from, you know, slaves, enslaved people in Freeman and the Caribbean, and all of that coming together down in New Orleans, and the history is incredible. And jazz means a lot of different things to different people. You ask somebody from New York or somebody from South Side, chicago or New Orleans, you're going to get you know different, you know ideas or definitions of it, but what I love about it is. There is that inclusion and community and resilience, and there's all of that in the music, and there's these jazz musicians who are innovators, and there's just an incredible art form that's endured, and so we use it as a catalyst for transformation. How do you bring more people together? How do you create greater access to the arts? We do free concerts, we put on music that isn't normally played here in this market. You know it's different from you, know Jazz and Rip Fest or what other organizations might be offering, and these younger up and coming. They've got a different style, different voice.

Speaker 3 23:47

How do you use jazz to impact education outside of just music education? Well, for me, it was, then, looking at the neuroscience of it. What's happening in the body, in the brain and in here when you're listening to this music? Well, I can tell you, the science can tell you too. It's activating creativity and innovation. It can help with things reduce anxiety, unlock memories, reduce blood pressure, help people with Alzheimer's and dementia.

Speaker 3 24:11

I'm interested in all of that, but I'm also interested in, you know, it being a gateway to bring children into the work, because our mission is preserving the legacy and it's advancing the future. Advancing the future is the youth and we do it a little bit. We just do it a little bit differently, you know. And then with like exploration, exploration is around, you know improvisational jazz, mindfulness, collaborative arts and discussion, and it's this beautiful half-day workshop, half or full-day workshop, and through it it's a capacity builder, because when it's unlocking those emotions and then you get into those really intimate conversations with your teammates or whatever, you're getting greater team cohesion because people are being authentic. And so there's this really wonderful power of the music, not only just for entertainment. But I always knew it had to be more than just entertainment and that's what I wanted to explore through A Tribe for Jazz Present the work, present the artists and their stories and all of those wonderful things and use that as a catalyst to create all this other programming.

Speaker 1 25:18

That's amazing, thank you. It is a twist, but it's, I think, more of an exposure, and how you're using it is just so brilliant. Do these artists find you? Oh we find them, we find them.

Speaker 3 25:33

Building community, building community. So yeah, it's interesting because all the young, I mean these young, hot, up-and-coming musicians, I mean they're, they're the ones, they're the future of the genre. And it's funny because you know how, like it's six degrees of separation, but in Columbus it's really three, maybe two and two. In the jazz world it's probably like two or one. Everybody knows, everybody, knows everybody, or can you can get to other people through, you know.

Speaker 3 25:58

So we just started building a network and, and it's all about character, though we're very specific about who we're working with, because it's about the character of the person. And you know, more than just being like-minded, you know, we're looking, we're doing that deep dive into them too, just as much as it's got to be, more than just like, oh, I'm booking talent, right, you know what I mean. We're building community, yeah, you know. And so when, when they come, I mean I mean we treat our artists like kings and queens. You get the full service. You get the full service, you know, and often the takeaway for them is they'll tell us they're like that's. They're like that's the best I've ever been treated. I mean, from the time they arrive at the airport and the car comes to the time they leave, we're hands on. It's just about showing the love Nice.

Speaker 1 26:45

Out of curiosity and I don't know why it just popped in my head. One of the things I talk a lot about when I do my speaking engagements is about removing the titles and the labels given to you, because that is what I think gets in the way. Do you give yourself labels now in this healed and I think healing is always a journey that we're just going to live with forever Yep, do you give yourself labels now? Do you find people doing that with you now? Because something tells me no.

Speaker 3 27:15

That's a great question, if I'm hearing you right. Okay, so my answer is people are still trying to figure out where to put us, so they've not labeled us. Yeah. They've not labeled us, yeah, us as an organization, or just me as me myself? You.

Speaker 1 27:29

Not talking about your organization. You are more than your organization.

Speaker 3 27:34

I'll share this. I find labels to be hard for me, right, but one of the things that has come out through doing this work is I did realize that I was seeing myself too small, and I was seeing myself too small, and so the journey the Lord has had me going through actually has been how do I see myself as he sees me? And so sometimes we do have to use the worldly labels that we understand right, but I don't. I've never been using those labels myself. I, you know. I mean people say stuff like it's kind of embarrassing, though sometimes whatever, I don't know, you know, they'll say visionary and things like that or whatever. And I'm like that's cool, I am living, I am executing a vision, a vision that's been given to me. You know what I mean, and so if that is, by definition, what it is, then that's fine, but I don't, I don't buy into stuff like that.

Speaker 1 28:34

Right, you don't assign them to you and however people see you is their problem, not yours.

Speaker 3 28:41

Yeah, yeah, or not a problem at all. It's not a problem. It's their decision, their decision, 100%, 100%. But I will tell you, though, we do have to, we do have to see ourselves in a very big way. It's important because, I'm telling you, when I said, I thought of myself in a very small way, you know. But when you're moving on to other levels and you know you're trying to take something statewide, and then nationwide and globally, or whatever, you have to start looking, you have to zoom out a little bit. Yeah, and I don't know if label's the right word. What other word can we find? Dahlia?

Speaker 1 29:18

I know I don't that word. I hate the word because I hate what it represents. But it's yeah, it's not a label. I don't have to think on that one yeah, but it's something, though it's something yeah, I going to write that down, because I'm going to follow up that with you. Like, I am going to follow up.

Speaker 3 29:37

Do you still play the trumpet? No, I picked up my nephew's trumpet a couple of months ago. I don't have the chops for it and I couldn't even remember how to read music. I was like, oh it's definitely. Those days are long gone, but it's somewhere in there.

Jazz as a Catalyst for Transformation

Speaker 3 29:50

It may be maybe, but if I could put instruments in the hands of a million kids I certainly would. And music and education, music education extremely important. But even if they didn't become professional musicians, just the opportunity to unlock that mathematics and scientific side of their brains which happens through music, playing music and even engaging in it.

Speaker 1 30:16

So yeah, I like to end every episode, even though the whole episode is exactly advice. I like to end it with if you could give listeners any advice on anything, what?

Speaker 3 30:28

would it be? So it may seem very obvious, dahlia, yeah, but we have to learn to give ourselves more grace with where we are in, whatever season we find ourselves. The pushing, the striving, the hustling, all of those things is not the way. It's the silence and the quiet and the thinking and finding time to hear the strategy from within or from however you feel like you receive it. You know for me, I know where, I know my source and I know where it all comes from, and however people receive that, but it's and the reason I'm saying grace is because I'm 52, right, and there is.

Giving Yourself Grace

Speaker 3 31:15

I could have looked at those 22 years as lost. I could have chosen to say it was all a waste. What was this? If that wasn't the you know whatever? No, no, it's grace to allow yourself understanding that that was preparation. For me, it was preparation, and now I'm into my work, work, my purposed work, and I don't know if I gave you the full answer. I hope I said something there that's useful. Oh my gosh. But it does have to do with the grace, though. It has to do with grace.

Speaker 1 31:48

You're absolutely right about giving yourself grace. What's interesting about that is every year I come up with a word and that's what I try to embody. That year and the year that I've been through a lot of change was in 22. That year my word was grace and it meant no matter what I encountered, I was going to forgive myself left and right for being human. But then, once you know better, you do better.

Speaker 1 32:16

So, it's a combination of it all, which to me equals grace, and so I love that. You said that it's good, and I'm so thankful you joined today and talked about everything. It's just so empowering. Your entire story is so empowering, and I can't thank you enough for sharing that today. Thank you for having me.

Speaker 2 32:40

What moves me most about Stephanie's story is her understanding that nothing in life is wasted. Every experience, even the painful ones, become preparation for what's next. Her revelation that her 22 years in photography were preparing her for the impact she's making now through a tribe for jazz speaks to something so many of us struggle with Trusting that our seemingly disconnected experiences will eventually make sense. Stephanie's advice to give ourselves grace resonates deeply because it acknowledges that we often judge our journeys harshly when we should be honoring the preparation process. Her reminder that we need to know when seasons are ending before the joy leaves, is wisdom. Many of us learn too late, myself included. I'm particularly struck by how she's transformed personal loss into community building. The way she's using jazz as a catalyst for healing, education and connection shows what's possible when we stop pushing against closed doors and start walking through the ones that open.

Speaker 2 33:38

Naturally, for those of you sitting with experiences that feel disconnected or wondering if you've wasted time on the wrong path, maybe Stephanie's story is permission to see your journey as preparation rather than detour. Sometimes the greatest gift we can give ourselves is grace for where we are and trust for where we're going. If today's conversation inspired you to reconsider your own journey with more compassion. Share it with someone who needs to hear it. Remember SheSweet Society exists to amplify women's voices from all walks of life. Proving that purpose often emerges from the most unexpected places. Until next time, this is your host, dahlia, reminding you that your life is your message to the world. Why not make it extraordinary?

Speaker 1 34:20

Thank you.