Beyond Daas - Drinking in a Perspective of Oneness (Purim!)

*Link to my Parsha WhatsApp chat mentioned in this episode - click here to join.

In this episode we are going to get into the meaning of the Gemara that says that a person is supposed to drink on Purim to the point of not being able to tell the difference between the cursedness of Haman and the blessedness of Mordechai. Why would this be something to strive for on such a holy day? And where are we really meant to get to internally through this process, whether we drink wine on Purim or not? We will get into all of that and so much more in this episode!  

If you want to follow along in the text, it is Nesiovs Shalom booklet on Purim on page nun zayin (57). You can find a pdf of the piece here.

This week's episode is anonymously sponsored for the refuah sheleimah of Binyamin Baer ben Chana and for the zechus that all Jews in the world should find meaning in the 613 mitzvot. Thank you so much to this week's generous sponsor!

If you would like to sponsor an episode of the podcast, please email Rabbi Charnoff at rabbicharnoff@gmail.com.

Transcript

Rabbi Charnoff: 0:02

Hello everyone! This is Rabbi Robby Charnoff and you are listening to the Hasidus for Life podcast. The podcast where we learn a deep Hasidic insight every single week and explore how it can lead us to a more meaningful. Vibrant and spiritually uplifted life. In this episode, we are going to dive into the holiday of Purim. Whether practically speaking, you drink on Purim or not. The Gemara tells us that we're required to drink on Purim until we can no longer tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai. Why would this be something to strive for on such a holy day? And what are we really meant to get to internally through this process, whether we drink wine or not? We'll get into that and so much more on Purim in today's episode. If you want to follow along inside, you can open up the Nesivo Shalom booklet on Purim to page Nun Zayin and the piece entitled B'Puraya Adi Lo Yada, or simply go to the show notes for a link to a PDF. But feel free to just sit back, listen, and enjoy the ride. Most people do. This week's episode is sponsored anonymously for the Refua Shalema of Binyamin Be'er Ben Chana, and for the schutz that all Jews in the world should find meaning in the 613 mitzvot. Thank you so much for sponsoring this week's episode. Your sponsorships are what make this podcast happen. If you would like to sponsor an episode of the podcast, please email rabbicharnoff at gmail. com or see the show notes for more details. All right, with that, let's jump into the Tzevo Shalom on Purim. Purim is coming. We are in Cevo Shalom. In the pamphlet on Purim, we are on page Nun Zion and the peace entitled Por De the Famous G. A big topic of discussion in the context of Purim that a person is obligated to get drunk on Purim to the state of AD Ada. Says the, the gamar states that a person is required to get drunk on Purim, to the point where they are not able to, distinguish between the curd of Hamman and the blessedness of Morde. Now, before even getting into how he's going to discuss this topic, I wanna say two things. Number one is we're gonna be talking about this. On a philosophical level, meaning at the end of the day, the Gemara says this line, at the end of the day, this line exists in the context of the Gemara. So what is the concept of? What's the concept of getting drunk on Purim, regardless of the halachic ramifications? And number two is, it's not so clear what the halach ha lameisa necessarily should be. There's a story that follows this line in the Gemara. which some interpret to mean that it is a terrible idea to drink on Purim and others interpret to mean that it is a good idea to drink on Purim. There's a discussion in the Shulchan Aruch, in the Raman, the Mishnah Bura, in terms of whether or not a person really should drink or shouldn't drink, to what extent they should drink, in what circumstances they should drink and shouldn't drink. That's a complicated and nuanced discussion and it applies to everybody differently. And even then, to quote my Rebbe, who is In his own way, very strongly pro drinking on Purim. that he believes that it should only be in the right context, with the right place, with the right people, in the right environment. it depends on you and where you are inside. When the wine comes in, the sode, the secret comes out. And to do a gut check, and what is the secret that's inside of you? And is something which should be shared with the world? Or if There's stuff inside that you shouldn't be shared and isn't appropriate to share. there's a lot of layers to this discussion. We're really focusing not on the act of drinking itself, but we're gonna be focusing on conceptually. How does the Gemara tell us? The line exists! What does it mean? How is it possible that we have a holiday where the Gemara states that a person is chayim to drink in the context of that holiday? How do we understand that philosophically? regardless of the psach that each one of us gets. about how to relate halachically to this concept in a practical way. With that out of the way, let's get into it. So, the Nesim HaShalom says, he says, He says, this concept it's an astonishing concept in the context of Purim. Purim is a tremendous day, is a holy day. The Har, there are so many holy aspects to this day. it's like Yom Kipper. Famously, the Rizal says that Yom Kipper the holiest day of the year. Yom Kippur, where the holiest person, the Kohen Gadol, on the holiest day, Yom Kippur, Shabbat, Shabbaton, goes into the holiest place, the Kodesh Kaddashim, that's Yom HaKippurim. And says the Arizal, Yom HaKippurim is Kippurim. It's like Purim. And as other Mepharshim then point out, the Gemara notes elsewhere, that when you say that something is Ki, something else, Like something else, the thing that's likened to something else is always on a lower level. So if Yom HaKippurim is only Kippurim, the implication is it's on a lower level than Purim. Can you imagine as a person comes to shul at the night of Yom Kippur on Kol Nidre, everybody's dressed in white, white yarmulke, white talis, white kittel, white shoes, white tie, white shirt, everything's in white, and a guy comes in plastered out of his mind? Like, can you imagine such a thing? It's insanity. It's insane. It's crazy that a person would do such a thing. And yet we're saying you're Chai Avinash It's holier than Yom Kippur. It's greater than Yom Kippur. Chai Avinash L'Besumim. There's even a conceptual idea to be drunk in such a time of holiness. How do we possibly understand that? The Yom Kippur Torah, it's like Yom Kippur, Megillat Esther, we went and we re accepted the Torah. On Purim. At Harsinai, we accepted the Torah, but we accepted it under duress. HaKadosh Baruch Hu held the mountain over our head and forced us, so to speak, to accept the Torah. And we accepted it! But we came back and re accepted the Torah from a place of avvah, from an even deeper place, a higher place, on Purim. How can we be drunk? Hainu that it's even on a higher level of Kabbalah Satorah. How could you say Chai, finish the b'sumeh. V'gam eit mechayat ha maleik. It's the time of mechayat ha maleik. There's this, we're fulfilling the tremendous mitzvah of wiping out ha maleik, and I'm sure that we'll get into it, but the depth of what wiping out ha maleik means, ha maleik begimatria is suffix, very famously. Ha maleik shares the same numerical value as the word suffix, doubt. We're wiping out the evil of ha maleik. We're wiping out all inner doubt. Doubt in ourselves, in our own capabilities. Doubt in our connections with the Kodesh Baruch Hu. Doubt in the existence of a Kodesh Baruch Hu. We're wiping out all of that doubt. How can we be drunk? And we have the Purim, the My Purim, that whenever anybody puts out their hand on Purim, you give them. That's the idea on Purim that normally on a regular day of the earth, somebody comes and asks you for takah, you have every right. To do your due diligence and double check is the person really an Ani? Is the person really a poor person? I set aside my hard earned money and I set aside part of it to give to Tzedakah I want to make sure that it's really going to an Ani. It's really going to Tzedakah So you're allowed to investigate who you give that money to. Not on Purim. Purim's not a hired place. It's a hired thing Somebody puts out their hand and says I need you don't ask any questions here. I'm giving you money here I'm giving you that's it and the Shulchan Aruch brings down the Milah of doing that and even says that it one of The reasons why we do that is because we're saying to a Qadosh Baruch Hu just like I'm not asking any questions Somebody puts their hand out to me on Purim I give to them. So to you a Qadosh Baruch Hu When I put my hand out to you today and daven to you today, whatever I ask you for, you don't do any checks. You just give me what I ask for. Midah keneged midah. That's why Purim is such a deep day of tefillah. There are many people who don't daven v'tikin the entire year, but dafgan Purim, they go and daven v'tikin. It's a tremendous day of tefillah, a tremendous day of prayer. notnim lo. Just like I'm giving to anybody who puts out their hand on Kadesh Baruch, while I'm putting out my hand to you in tefillah, I'm asking you for what I need in my life. Don't ask any questions. Just please give me what I'm asking for. How can we be drunk? The same question. L'lech ora darush lechol zeh harbei harbei yishuv ha'dat. And it would seem all of these things would require a tremendous amount of yeshuv ha'das. A tremendous amount of clarity. We need clarity to understand how to wipe out Amalek. We need clarity to be Maccabal of the Torah. We need the clarity like we have on Yom Kippur to daven properly. We need tremendous clarity on Purim, it would seem. V'er zeh mit yashevim achiyu v'le b'sumim pevorayah How do you make that work with this Statement that you should be drunk on Purim. How do we understand that? V'alderach ha'avodah. And in terms of our Avodas Hashem, Yesh le'avin. Sh'memurmaz b'lashon ha'mamar, Chayav inesh le'b'sumi b'Puraya, Dlo'amnu le'b'sumi b'yayin ele b'Puraya. Pssst. Sh'yiztaker me'ha Purim, Atzmo b'vchinat shichut v'lo miyayin, Ki mikol ha'giluyim el yiskavim shal Purim, Shehem b'chinat achat pashanah. Wow. So he says very beautifully, and this already in and of itself answers the question, what if I don't drink on Purim? What if somebody listening says, I don't drink on Purim, which is totally understandable, totally fine. It certainly has backing in the Postkin. What if I don't drink on Purim? He says, how do we when it says in the Gemara, that a Jew is required, is obligated to drink on Purim. It doesn't say like you would expect it to say a Jew is required to drink wine on Purim. It says a person is chayav on this special holy day to get drunk. On Purim, to drink in Purim, to bring Purim inside of me, to take all of these tremendous lofty heights that are embedded in this special and holy day and bring them inside of me, regardless of the act of drinking itself. And to be clear, this is definitely not apologizing for those who are not drinking on Purim. this is the slonim Rebbe, talking to a bunch of chassidim who are very likely drinking on a regular Tuesday. Purim was not an exception to the rule, Purim was the rule. He's turning around to his male has and saying that when it says pariah, in addition to the physical drinking, if that's what you do, that there's a requirement. And this is the inner world of the drinking in and of itself anyway. And that's why anybody and everybody is lib pariah. Even if you don't drink pariah of to drink in Purim. The depth of this day, the holiness of this day, that we're gonna get into a day that's beyond Yom Kipper, the highest day of the year. You have to drink it in regardless of what you drink. I'll say even relating to what we talked about in the last episode, a person is not to drink, say. In fact, there's seemingly no ch'yuv to get drunk, per se. Definitely not to get drunk in the way some people get drunk in a disgusting way. That would be l'hishtak er b'puraya. Chai v'nish l'b'sume b'puraya. B'sume m'lashon b'samim. To breathe in Purim. To smell in Purim. Coming back to what we talked about at the end of the last episode. The depth of the sense of smell, and how deep smell is, that it's going all the way back to Gan Eden. It's the only sense. That Chava didn't sin within Gan Eden, she touched the fruit, she heard the snake, she tasted the fruit, she saw the tree that it was good for eating, but she never smelled And so it goes all the way back, the sense of smell can take us back to Gan Eden, before Gan Eden, before the question of Hamin Ha'et, before Haman comes about. Back to a place of tikun. The sense of smell is so deep. the ket at the end of the previous parsha is so deep. We talked about it a little bit last time, and those who were in the WhatsApp chat that we have on the Hummish Shi, which I'll bi link this week in the show notes as well, if you'd like to join the idea of smell. we had a sheer on that in the WhatsApp chat just the sense of smell and relationship to Purim. But a person needs to drink in Purim to breathe in Purim. even if a person doesn't drink, to get these tremendous heights. And so he's asking a question. What is the nature of the heights of Purim that I'm supposed to be drinking in? That I'm supposed to be breathing in? that's getting me to a place where I'm able to wipe out Amalek, where it's Kabbalah, Satorah, Be'ahavah, where I'm able to, be on a higher level than Yom Kippur. That I'm able to just look at every Jew and kol haposhi, give what, any Jew asks me something, I give to them. totally in the same place as them, whatever they need. How do I breathe in Perim, drink in per in away where I'm living it to this depth. So he says, we're in the last two lines of the first page. Based on this we can explain the concept of what does it mean to not know the difference between the curses of Hamman who was so evil and the blessedness of Mordecai? was one of the greatest II you've ever lived. I'm supposed to get to a place where I can't even tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai. that's a very far place. So what does it mean? Sh'u kashor l'chol mitzvot ha'yom shel Purim. So he's claiming here that this concept that a person needs to get to a place where they can't tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai that relates to all of the aspects of Purim. I have to not be able to tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai in the context of, top of the next page, Kriyas HaMegillah, the reading of the Megillah. I have to not be able to tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai in the context of Mishloach Manos. In the context of giving gifts to my friends. I have to not be able to tell the difference between haman and mordechai within the context of wiping out a malik and mihiyas a malik. And also, kabbalas ha Torah ba Ratzon and receiving the Torah out of love. Shekimu aleihem v'al zar'am. That we receive the Torah ba'av. He continues on and says Deinei inyanei hapurim mitchalkim legimol chalakim, k'neged gimol chalkei ha'shleimut ba'avodas HaShem. The idea of Purim, the concept of Purim, he says, is divided into three aspects that are k'neged, the three aspects of our having a complete avodas HaShem. Kemo shekatuva ma'aral, as the ma'aral says. Deshlemut avodat Hashem, that a full and complete reality of avodat Hashem, kolelet shalemim bor'o, shalemim chaveiro, v'shalemim atzmo. Right, there's three levels of relationship in a person's life. There's bin adam lemakom, between myself and HaKadosh Baruch Hu, bin adam lechaveiro, between myself and my friend, and bin adam leatzmo, between me and myself. And a person only has a Shlemos in Avodas Hashem, when there's Sholem in all three of these levels. Between myself and HaKadosh Baruch Hu, myself and my friend, and myself and me. U'vi and what he's claiming here is, U'vi kolam yesh bechinat, in each one of these, there's a level of B and a level of A, which I assume is going to explain that a person is high of to get drunk on Purim, to get drunk on the DU of the day. Again, the wine is a means to an end for those who use it. A person is chah is everyone is chayiv. To get drunk on the essence of the day, the kedushah of the day. Adilo yad zavin arrahaman levarech mordechai. To the point where they can't tell the difference between the cursedness of Haman and the blessedness of Mordechai. Let's maybe give a little bit of background or open up Purim a little bit here before we get into each one of these levels, which I think will help explain how he's relating these three levels to the concept of not knowing the difference between the blessedness of Mordecai and the cursedness of Haman. Let's come to it from a different angle, an unexpected angle from the unexpected day. Every single month has a different. Astrological sign. In a previous episode when we talked about Shfat a few weeks ago, we talked about how it's the sign of the d'li, of the bucket, it's drawing forth new waters, new realities of Torah. the astrological sign of Purim is the dag, the fish. Why the fish? What's going on with the fish? On one level, there's something very pure about the fish. In the flood, everything was wiped out in the flood, except for the fish. And it's not because the flood was with water. The water was boiling, it killed everything else that was in the water. but Dafka the fish survived because they were so pure. So what's going on with the fish? One aspect of the fish is the dog. Is that what the dog does is, is it lives In one reality, it lives in the reality of the water, and that's what it knows. That's what it relates to. That's its status quo. But the fish can do something amazing. Every once in a while, the fish has the capacity to swim all the way to the top of the water. and jump up and out of the water into a higher level of reality to touch the air beyond the water and see a reality above and beyond its normal status quo and then come back down inside. And the fish is the only thing that can do such a thing. That's a little bit of what we're trying to experience on Purim. For 364 days of the year we live within the context of a certain reality. We live in a reality! We live in a reality that's It's post Eitz HaDa'at Tov Vara, where we ate from the tree. We live in a post Tov and Ra reality where we're struggling with Tov and Ra and we're supposed to. And one day a year we jump beyond that. We jump and touch a kedush of a reality that's beyond our own. so if we live in a Tov and Ra reality, what do we need in order to navigate a Tov and Ra reality? We need Da'at. DA is the ability to discern what we're supposed to do and what we're not supposed to do. And a person needs to, if a person's DA is broken, that person's a very dangerous person. A person who doesn't know how to distinguish between right and wrong, between good and evil, that's very dangerous. To live in a world in such a way, they're gonna get to a lot of sins, a lot of kam, a lot of trouble, So we need da'as in order to distinguish. But if you think for a second in Shmona Esrei, the first of the main brachos of chol of Shmona Esrei is da'at. If you were to go one higher, one above, one before the bracha of da'at, what's the bracha before the bracha of da'at? The everything is kado. We live in a reality of Torah. We're required to distinguish in Torah, and the only healthy and normal way to live in reality is to know Torah. Distinguish between it, embrace the tove, and reject the rah. But one day a year, we're like the fish. One day a year, we jump above. We jump beyond. That reality of that da'at, and we jump to a level of Kiddusha, and in the world of Kiddusha, there's no distinguishing. I leave all of my da'at behind, and I see with clarity that it's all Kaddosh, it's all HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Everything is coming from HaKadosh Baruch Hu. I see that oneness, I see with clarity that they're on a certain level, on a Purimdicka level, on a Kadosh level, I see it's all one. there's no difference in how blessed Mordechai is now and how Mekul HaHaman is. It's all the same. If you think about it, who's necessary for the Purim story? You need Esther. Without Esther, the Jews don't get saved. You need Mordecai. Without Mordecai, there's no story of Purim Mechlam. But you know who else you need? You need Haman. If there's no Haman, there's no Purim. And for one day to embrace that reality, if there's no Haman, there's no Purim. It's a crazy concept. Again, it's not a normal or healthy way to live for the other 364 days, but one day you're to touch that reality, that it's Kulo Meis Hashem, that it's all from HaKadosh Baruch Hu. He's bringing it all about. And we get into every single aspect of the day. And I assume this is what he's going to get into in the piece. And we'll see as we go forward and we'll unpack it the way he wants to unpack it. You get into every aspect of what Purim is about. And you no longer distinguish anymore. You remove da'as. Ad dilo yada. It's a day where you leave da'as behind. And you don't see arur haman. You don't see Baruch Mordechai. I just see HaKadosh Baruch Hu. That's the goal. I just see HaKadosh Baruch Hu. I look at my friends and it doesn't matter who he is. I just see a Goresh Baruch, I go to a seudah, and let's say a person does get drunk, I go and I get drunk, and I sing and dance with the people who I chose to have my seudah with, and then I go and I veer off and I walk into 186th Street and the Heights, by YU, and I find somebody in a costume, head to toe, and I have no idea who he is, but it's Purim and he's in costume, and I grab his hands and I sing and dance with him, why? It's Kulo HaKadosh Baruch Hu. And then I go and I see a lamppost. And I go and I sing and dance with the lamppost. Because it's Kulo HaKadosh Baruch Hu. And that might be based on a true story. Right? that's the reality of what Purim should be. All I see is HaKadosh Baruch Hu. It's all the same. It's all the revelation of that oneness. Because that's the truth of it. The truth of reality is, is that all there is is a Q ado. There's only a, and I live one day of a reality of a odo. All I see is him. All there is is him. All of the distinctions fall away. All of the distractions fall away. It's a day where we read. Esther. Megillah means a scroll, but it also means ligalot. It's a revelation. What is Megillah et Esther a revelation of? Megillah et Esther, of Esther Amalka, but Esther Milashon Hester. It's a revelation of God is hidden here the entire time. It's a revelation of the fact that HaKadosh Baruch Hu is hidden underneath every second of my life, every breath that I take. He is there. It's all Him under the surface. My friend in the In the Ani in everything. So how can there be? It's a day where there's no doubt, it's a day where it's ko. It's a day where I breathe in and I drink in the cadu of the day to let all of those distinctions fall away. And I just see, I just see it's all the oneness of Kbo. And I assume that that's gonna be, the backdrop of what he's saying here, that there's the reality of ve. That I no longer make distinctions between good people and bad people, as I subjectively relate to it. No distinctions. We'll see how he relates to that. I don't see any good or bad within myself. I just see the wonders of HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Let's see how he brings it out in the context of these halachas of the day, and in the context of the peace. Next paragraph. Creata Megillah, he says. The reading of the Megillah? That's relating to my relationship with HaKadosh Baruch Hu. There are times where HaKadosh Baruch Hu helps a Jew, that my mind and my heart are completely open to feel close to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. B'vchinat Baruch Mordechai, that's a Baruch Mordechai dikatayim. When my heart and my mind are open to HaKadosh Baruch Hu, I feel that clarity, I see him, he's in my life. Ve'yishnam zmanim chashukhim biyotem. And Nebach, there are times in life that are very dark. Sheh margish ki nitrachik me'od mehasham yiparach. There are times when I feel very distant from HaKadosh Sha, where there's a Hester, there's a hiddenness of a kku, both in a physical way and a spiritual way. I feel distant. I can't find him. I don't experience him in the physical world. I don't feel him in a rookie way in my life. I feel so distant and dark. That it feels, and it's subjective, but it feels to me like I've been thrown out of the courtyard of HaKadosh Baruch Hu. And I just feel my whole life is like Arrahman. I feel like I'm in a state of Arrahman. We've talked to him many times in the past, and I'm sure we're going to talk about it in the future. He brings this up a lot. It's a very important topic. We're not going to get into it in depth here. But that's the worst, the most difficult state for a Jew to be in, is when a person feels like he's thrown off from a Kadesh Baruch, like he's been kicked out by a Kadesh Baruch. That darkness of Arur Haman in that level of life. cause as long as I feel close to, I can withstand anything. If I feel close to and I can get through, whatever does throws in me, if I'm being tested in my life. If things are difficult, if a person is going through difficulty with a child is going through no, a sickness or an illness in the family by themselves with somebody else, is going through the challenges that we've gone through over the last few years, challenges emotionally or physically in the conscious of Corona challenges, emotionally or physically, if they're even literally on the battle front, in the war, whatever the case may be, if first feels like they're in darkness, if a person is in a difficult test, if they feel they're close to. They can get through anything. If I'm able to hold on to that clarity that HaKadosh Baruch Hu is with me, I can make it through anything. But what's more worse, but what's worse and ra and bitter? In a person's life, when it seems to them subjectively, like they're thrown off from Makarash Baruch Hu. K'ha Mitzrayim. Like those who have been thrown out and exiled to Ashur, to Mitzrayim. Achim b'purim baran purim? A person is required to breathe in Purim, to drink in Purim, that they can't tell the difference between the curs of Hamman and the blessedness of Morde. Summa that I draw forth from Perim a deep that I feel no difference in the times where I'm close to and I'm far from. Yes, subjectively, I know that there are times when I feel elation and joy and closeness, and yes, I know that there are times where I subjectively feel distant and dark and closed off. But on Purim, I transcend that, and I know it's all in my mind. I'm always close to a Keresh Baruch Hu. There may be an emotional feeling of distance or closeness, but I'm standing there next to him, and he's holding my hand, no matter what situation I'm in. I'm beyond the subjectivity of this world. I'm beyond the Eitz HaDas Tov Vara. I'm living in a world of Kedusha, in a world of clarity. That even when it's dark, I don't care, I'm holding a Qadosh Baruch Hu's hand. And it's the same hand that I'm holding from the same distance as when I feel close to him. There's no difference between Arahaman and Baruch Mordechai. That we hold like Rabbi Meir who says it doesn't matter whether you're on the highest of highs, or whether you've done tremendous sins. It doesn't matter, we're always called Banim. We're always the children of a Qadosh Baruch Hu. We've said this in the past, and we'll say it again, I'm sure, in the future. that any other relationship you can break. We so often, in our learning together, we compare the relationship between God and the Jewish people, between God and myself, like that of a husband and a wife. But Nebach, a husband and a wife, can get divorced. HaKadosh Baruch Hu goes out of his way and says, No, you're Bonham, you're my children. No matter what happens, no matter how hard I throw you out of the house, And I could destroy that house, the Besa Mikdash. Or no matter how far you try to run from the house, You can never destroy the genetic bond between a child and a parent. And he calls us his children. Because no matter what, we are always going to be his children. In the good times, we're his children. In the bad times, we're his children. In the good times and the bad times, we're the same genetic relationship. You can't change that based on your actions. You're always close to me. That's the MS. You can be Aror as Haman. You could be as Baruch as Mordechai. You're as close to me in the same way. There's, there may be a difference in the dynamic of our relationship, but we're always close. There's no difference in how close we are, even if they don't have tremendous height. And even if they sin, they're still. he said this was told over one of the rabbis in the time of the Holocaust. It doesn't matter what's going on, and it could be the Holocaust. It could be a time of tremendous darkness and pain. Nothing can change the fact that even if you are a prince in captivity, even if you're a prince in a concentration camp, nobody can change the fact that you're a prince. Nobody can change the fact that you're a princess. Nobody can change that you were born to the king. They can treat you wrong, and I can be in darkness, and I can be in pain. But I always remain the son of the king. I always remain the daughter of the king, even when he is angry at me, even when he runs me out of the house. Even when he's giving me tremendous pain and suffering for the sins that I've committed. I'm always his child that never gets broken shots. It's rif. That's the reality that a Jew needs to feel even in the darkest and most challenging of times. sh'becho melech. That no matter what situation I'm in, I'm always the son of the king. I'm always the daughter of the king. U'bepurim and anpurim, tzarich lehagia l'shleimut im bor'o. Back to what we started with. I have to get to a place of shleimus, of completion, of wholeness, in my relationship to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. That I can't tell the difference between Aman and Boak Morde that I feel that there's no difference no matter what situation I'm in. Shahar, the only differences in how I feel, it's my subjective feeling that's different. But the objective reality is I'm always as close no matter how I feel, top of the next column, although, but I always remain. The child of the king. V'zeh inyan mitzvahet mikram megillah. And that's what mikram megillah is all about. megillah moreh inyan zeh. That the megillah teaches us this. Yisrael be'matzav ha'shafal biyoter be'gashmiyut ve'ruchaniyut. That even when Kaal Yisrael was in the lowest place, physically, spiritually, they were such a low place in the megillah. V'ayu kvar kimushlachim lagamim lifnei Hashem. It's like they were totally thrown off from HaKadosh Baruch Hu. That the g, the decree was already sealed with the signe ring of the king that we were gonna be destroyed. That was, says it's signed, it's sealed, it's delivered, it's usually gonna be destroyed. Fine. I don't care. I love you beyond that, and I'm overthrowing the decree. Because that's how much I love you, and I'm never going to let you go. I love you no matter what situation you're in. I don't care how many times you went to the king's party. I don't care what you did. I don't care how low you brought yourself. I don't care what's going on. I love you, and I'm close to you, and I'm going to save you, even from the decree of the king. And on that level, we need to get to a place of being drunk on the reality of Purim, to have that Shlemus with the Kadesh Baruch. No matter how dark, no matter how challenging, to recognize that Akkadosh Baruch was always with me. And that's, I mean, that is what the story of Purim is about. We also had this on a different share that I think I posted last week on the other chat as well. Again, I'll put the link in the show notes. But the, you go through the timeline of Purim, it's insane. it totally changed my understanding of the Megillah when I went through the timeline one year and it became a whole sheer for me. You recognize the fact, the majority of the events that take place in the Megillah happen over the course of 24 hours. Just to play it out very quickly, I know we all know the story, but to play it out very quickly to realize, when you hear Megillah this year, play the timeline out in your head. What happens? Mordecai tells Esther to go and to speak to the king. She fasts for three days. She says, okay, fine. I'm going to go and talk to the king. She goes to the king and he says, whatever the queen wants, I'll give you up to half of the malchus. I'll give you whatever you want. She says, I have one thing to ask you, please, you and Haman come to a party that same day. So that same day, the three of them go to a party, and the king says, Listen, we're at this party, up to half the kingdom, I'll give you whatever you want. She says, I'll tell you what I want, one thing I ask of you. In a day from now, 24 hours from now, I want you to come to another party. Givaldik. So they all go out, and on his way out, Haman, sees Mordecai. And Haman's infuriated. He gets invited to this amazing banquet with just him and the king and the queen, but he hates the Jews so much. He can't get it out of his mind. And he goes home and he tells his wife and he can't stop thinking about it. She says, you know what? Build a tree, build the gallows to hang Mordecai on. So that same day as that first party, He goes and he builds the gallows. And he wants to hang him the next day, but he's Haman. And he hates the Jews. He's Amalek. Amalek hates the Jews with such an extreme nature to them that he can't sleep. So he goes and starts pacing outside of the palace. And wouldn't you know it, somebody else can't sleep. That's the same night that the king can't sleep. And so he goes and asks to read from the book. And in the book they read of The time that Mordecai had saved him. And he says, is there anybody around who can help me figure out what to do for Mordecai? And lo and behold, Haman's outside because he wants to hang Mordecai. So he's pacing outside. And then he gets called in and the king says, what do we do for the person the king loves? And he says, oh, go and put him on a horse and parade him around and tell him how wonderful he is. And this is how much the king loves the people who he's close to. And so he says, great. You, Haman, are going to do that for Mordecai when he was there to get him hung. So he has to go and take him around the next day. He goes and he walks around Mordecai in this beautiful way and then comes back home. And now he's twice as depressed. And his wife says to him, listen, if you're going against the Jews, there's almost no hope for you. And after he says that sentence, what happens? He gets whisked away to the second party. This is all in this 24 hours. He comes to the second party and what happens? That's what Esther says. He, that guy, Haman, wants to destroy me and all of my family and all of my people. And on that day, he says, go and take Haman and hang him on the gallows. That he was going to hang Mordecai. The whole thing happens in a day. That's V'naafochu. It's not like, yes, there's other elements to it, and the beauty that HaKadosh Baruch Hu planted the seeds for all of this, all the way back years before, when Vashti was executed and Esther was taken to be queen. And that's a whole other level of the V'naafochu, and how we understand what a story is, and the structure of a story, and how HaKadosh Baruch Hu guides the world. But just to look at those 24 hours, It goes from the gallows being made to Haman hanging from them. From the Jews being at the brink of destruction and Mordecai being on the brink of death, to the Jews being in power, Mordecai being second to the king, writing a decree to save the Jews, and Haman's hanging from that same gallows. Why? Because it doesn't matter. Whether we're in a situation where it feels like the whole world is going to end, where it feels like the Jews are going to be wiped out, where it feels like there's no hope. That was the state of the Jews. There was a decree from the king that they were all going to get wiped out on the 13th of Adar. That was where they were. And 24 hours later, the person who wrote that decree was dead on the gallows he made for the guy who was risen up to be second to the king, who was a Jew, who wrote the counter decree to save them because the Kadesh Baruch who was with us. On the day before, and HaKadosh Baruch Hu will be with us on the day after. There's no difference in HaKadosh Baruch Hu in my life, between Or Raham except for my subjective experience of how I feel. Do I feel close to HaKadosh Baruch Hu, or do I feel distant from HaKadosh Baruch Hu? But HaKadosh Baruch Hu is always right there, always guiding my life. Beautiful, loving, guiding hand is bringing me always to the good, no matter what is going on. And in the moments where there's a decree of death on me, I need to realize that. And in the moments of great elation, when we overcome our enemies, I need to see that as well. It's all God. And He's guiding me through every step of the way, and He's with me just as close, whether it's Baruch Mordechai or whether it's Araham. Next paragraph. so too on a level of me being shale on a level of me and my friend, there's a level of Aman and there's a level of Akhai Mar Libo. There are people that a person feels, I Amish field, this person is so close to my heart. And they're on a level of Burak morde, the people who I when I'm in, in a difficult situation and I feel down and I feel I need help, people who I turn to, the people who, when I have tremendous sims in my life. I'm able to turn to and share that joy with them. People who I'm able to share the deepest steps of my heart with. They're my Burak Morde people. And there are those where ne a person looks at them and they see that person as a. Whether that person is never in a low place and they seem like they're not. Maybe they're doing all kinds of sins or they're getting in all kinds of trouble, or they're doing things that are inappropriate. Or it could be that no, objectively they are doing things that are wrong. It's not even that. It appears to me that they're doing some things that are wrong. They're objectively doing things that are wrong, will be Purim. But when it comes to Purim. A person's required to drink in and smell and breathe in Purim, and that's the whole concept of mic, of giving gifts to one's friends that's coming out in the reality of that mitzvah. To increase the love and closest in connection with my fellow Jew says, of loving ones fellow like oneself. A person, a Jewish is obligated to love everyone in Israel like themselves. This is such a lofty level. To love every other June matter what situation they're in. It's very hard, kadeshi, that the true way to be makadesh oneself. Peter kol, reshit kol, what's the first thing you do? What's the opening way to get to true kiddusha? Peter rechem. Peter means the beginning of, the first of. What's the first thing you do? Rechem, meaning l'rachem, to have rachamim on everyone. The beginning of Kadu is pet to start off, to have the beginning of everything. Be rah to love every Jew. It doesn't matter whether the person's an Adam Madre or the person's ma ham or the person acts like an animal. It doesn't matter to me. I love them. I have, I'm connected to them. You have to love. Would you like yourself? That's coming out through the midst of the day of mic because the beginning of what broke down in the times of Mor and Esther was what Hamman said. What Hamman said to was correct. He said they're a nation who's all spread out. They're all disparate. What does that mean? They're not connected to each other. When we're not connected to each other, when we're not one people and we don't love every other Jew, then everything falls apart. Comes from us being one when sad gathered together. it's for them, but also not for the entire world. When Jews are truly bound together, there's a tremendous AK that we have that's not even close when we're not linked together to each other. In the times of Purim who we were separate from one another, we were disparate. When we're spread out, we're distant. When a person's scattered in their mind, when a person's unclear on things in their life. They feel distant from everything around them. they see issues and everything around them. this is the tikun for this is top of the next page. Shal shaleim imcha ve'ro, B'purim ho'yadei mishloach manot leharbot hareut v'yididut imkol achad ve'achad. The reason why we have this totally unique mitzvah on Purim, of giving gifts to our friends! It's a totally strange thing. Why is a giving gift to my friend, what does it do with Purim, what does it do with Ganesh Baruch Hu? The answer is it does! Because on Purim I have to see that everything is a oneness. And I have to become one with all of Klaal Yisrael. It's interesting, there's a machloket regards to the Manot. Should you give Mishloach Manot specifically to your best friend? To emphasize the depth of connection and love that you have with that person. Or daf gago, and you give me shlok monad to somebody who you are distant from, or have issues with, to actually be moderators with them. And to me, I think it's so beautiful, the answer is, both! The answer is, on Purim, you can have both of those opinions because It doesn't matter, because the person you love and the person you hate on Purim It's all the same. Haman and Mordechai is all the same. You see somebody and you think they're a Mordechai? Okay. You see somebody and you think they're a Haman? No! They're all There's no difference between them Purim. They're all the same. And so whether you give to somebody who you don't love so much and you want to love more, or whether you love a lot and want to emphasize that love that you have for them, it's all the same mitzvah, because they're a chelak elok ha'imau. They're part of khalal Yisrael. That's the beauty of Mishloach Manot. That's the beauty of seeing the oneness in each other, the oneness in every Jew that's coming out. Ad lo yada. I don't see the negative side of my friend anymore. I don't see the negative side of the other person anymore. That's what I'm trying to bring out. We have on a level of, on the level of. So what's left? Shalem was between me and myself. So where is that coming out? He says, Then there's a level of Purim of being Shalem with myself. The Hadar kiblu ha'baratzon ba'asei tov That there is an element On Purim, of wiping out Amalek on a level of surmeirah, so we can totally receive the Torah, the Asetov. And about this also, it says that you should get drunk on Purim in a way where you tell the difference between the curses of Hamman and the blessedness of Mordecai. When a person's not shalim with themselves, complete, whole with themselves. As the Pasuk says, Ain shalom be'atzmi. The Holy Prophet says in Tehillim, that I don't have shalom in myself. As ve'osko betzorah v'avodah hu b'vchinah baruch mortachai. Then such a person who's not shulling with himself, when they're learning Torah, and they're engaged in avodah Hashem, Then they're, yeah, they're on a level of Barak morde, but ne, that same person, the second they walk out of the base, me and the second they get into the physical world and they're lost in the tavas and the desires of the physical world, they're on a level of It's not showing with myself, I'm not showing with myself. I'm flying in the base, mad rush, but I'm falling flat on my face in the physical world. Says, what does it mean, Revo, when there is strife in your gates? So it's talking about when the strife in a city, but it's saying no. What does it mean on a deeper level? When you have inner strife, there's strife within your innermost gates between you and yourself. Ha'ivarim ha'chomrim, m'shukaim bet'avot ha'gashmiyut, v'ilu ha'nishamah alkah. That a person's just enmeshed in physicality, but their chelak elok mimal, their nishamah, is totally distraught about this. Purim. But when it comes to Purim on Purim one last time, we need to drink in Purim on a way where we don't see the difference between the ness of Hamman and the blessedness of Morain. That when it comes to Purim, I get to a place where there's no difference. I'm learning Torah and I'm ish, I'm in the sub, or I'm in the piece of cas or I'm in the past or whatever it is, and I'm flying. I'm, and I get into the meat that's on the table and the wine that's on the table, and I get into the food that I'm giving to my friend, And it's Kulu HaKadosh Baruch Hu also. It's all HaKadosh Baruch Hu. There's no difference. I'm flying in the spiritual and I'm flying in Ruch Nias, in the physical. Because there's no difference between Baruch Mordechai in the Talmud Torah, in the Ruch Nias side and the Araham All one on Purim. I'm flying in the GMI side. He gives this sport over many times in the sea. Sha, it's so beautiful. What is, it means the whole world belongs to the says no. The world is full of what? ways to acquire you. The whole world is full of physical things and through all of those physical things at Q Burle, I can acquire you. I can elevate every aspect of the physical world to be a means through which I can acquire you. I don't need to only sit in front of a safer to acquire you a Q Burle. I don't only need to sit in front of a safer to connect to you and understand you and be and be spiritual and be flying. I connect to you and acquire your relationship with you and connect to you through the physical also. Mal'ah Ha'aretz Kinanecha Kimo Sheh Afshar Liknoto Al Yidey Torah V'Avoda Just like I can acquire a relationship with the Kaddish Baruch Hu Through learning Torah and Avodas Hashem B'Nanim HaGashmi'im So too when I'm in the physical world, enmeshed in physicality Um, and I understand that everything was created for who's covered Every physical thing around me sha that a person then has within themselves. I'm not living two lives. There's no cognitive dissonance. There's no, the me that's in the base med rush, the me that's in has the me that's in shul. That's not one separate person. Then there's the me that goes out and parties at night. Then the me that goes and does this when I go out to this place. And me that eats this uncultured food when I go to that place. There's no two me's. I'm Shalem with myself. There's no cognitive dissonance. There's no dissonance in my actions. There's no dissonance in who I am. I'm Shalem. I'm someone who mamesh is flying. I'm flying in chesed. I'm flying in tefillah. I'm flying in Talmud Torah. And I'm flying in the physical world because it's all avodah Hashem. U'purim hu hayom ha mesugal lekach. This is the day. Purim is the day. That's specially attuned to this. L'cholel biyoudi mahapecha klalit. Where a Jew can, Mamesh, overturn, v'na'afochu, upturn their entire inner world. B'vchinat hadar kibluah beratzon. To Mamesh, m'kabal the Torah in every aspect of my life, beratzon. Sheh ha'he'arot ha'gvohot ha'ele yordot midei shana b'shana. That these tremendously lofty lights of Purim come down every single year. And if kippur it requires me to bring about a change, I go to shul and I dove in my heart out to change things from down here and make the change happen up there. That I do all the work down here to draw down the light on Yom Kippur. When it comes to Purim, That's HaKadosh Baruch Hu shining the light down on His own. We're not doing anything. Even if we didn't prepare, and Baruch Hashem we're preparing now together. But even if, Nebach, we didn't prepare, doesn't matter, on Purim the light comes down. On Purim the gates open up. On Purim HaKadosh Baruch Hu is just hugging us. On Purim we're one with HaKadosh On Yom Kippur, it's a beautiful, I don't remember where I heard this, but it's a beautiful concept. On Yom Kippur, the holiest person, the Kohen Gadol, On the holiest day, Yom Kippur, goes into the holiest place, the Kodesh HaKadoshim. On Purim, it's much bigger than that. We have to prepare for this. On Purim, it's bigger because, inside of me, in these parasha, we're building the mishkan. Inside of me, inside of me is a mishkan, and in my inner mishkan is the Kodesh Kadashim. Purim is the day where every single one of us goes into the Kodesh HaKadashim. Not just the Kohen Gadol, in the Beis Hamikdash, on that day. On Purim, all of us, every single one of us, go into our own inner Kodesh HaKadashim. We become one with the Kadesh Baruch Hu, we bond with the Kadesh Baruch Hu, And the only way that that can happen is, I'm Shalem with myself. If I have faith in myself, if I wipe out Amalek, I wipe out all the sfeikos, wipe out all the sfeikos about HaKadosh Baruch Hu, does he exist? Of course he exists. Is he in my life? Of course he's in my life. Do I deserve to be connected with him? And that's the real question. Am I really connected to him? Can I really live a life of vodash Hashem when I'm a lowly physical being and I have all these taivas and all these issues and all these things that I'm struggling with and all these things that I'm not good at? I'm not good enough. I have all of this self doubt that's sfechos and on Purim we stand up and we drink in Purim and breathe in Purim to say No, it's all sfechos. It's all amalek and shtuyot. I'm shelling because the Kodesh Baruch was in me and I dance I dance into my Kodesh HaKadoshim inside And become one with the Kadesh Baruch, Shleimos within myself, wiping out Amalek. atzmo, I can be shalim with myself on Purim. V'al yidei zeh yashalim im chavirav, and through that I can be shalim with my friend. V'yigia and I can also be shalim with the Kadesh Baruch. Purim is the holiest day of the year. On the outside, Purim looks like the least holy day of the year. It's a day where we read a sefer of Tanach. Where God's name isn't mentioned. We give gifts to our friends. Kadesh Baruch was not part of the picture. We give gifts to the poor. We're supporting society. A Kadesh Baruch was not in the picture. I make a huge meal. Kadesh Baruch, there's no mitzvah at the meal except to drink wine, which doesn't sound so firm in and of itself. It's a day where there's no Akadosh Baruch Hu, because it's a day where everything is Akadosh Baruch Hu. Where everything is Akadosh Baruch Hu to the point where I am able to dig so deep that there is no Baruch Mordechai, there's no Arahaman. I look at this day and I'm involved only in things that seem to not be Akadosh Baruch Hu all day, that seem to be Arahaman all day long, but they're not. It's all Baruch Mordechai. It's all Rahaman. It's all Baruch Mordechai. Because it's irrelevant. It's beyond the Reh. It's going up a level. It's the fish jumping up and touching a higher level. Touching a higher reality. It's touching that Kedusha. Living in a Kedusha. Living in a space of a pre Eitz HaDas Tovah reality, where I'm just living Eitz HaChaim. I'm alive with the life of a Kadesh Baruch Hu and everything is a Kadesh Baruch Hu. And I see everything for the truth it is. I see a Kadesh Baruch Hu. And with this thought, I heard from Rav Judah Mishel said so beautifully how could it be that on Purim that Yerushalayim celebrates after everybody else? Yerushalayim always has to come first! How could it be that the whole world celebrates on the 14th and then Yerushalayim celebrates on the 15th? how could that be? he says no, that's not what's happening. What's happening? the first day of Purim is Shush on Purim is Purim. Purim is the 15th. That's Purim. And then he says, The whole rest of the year is Chol Hamoid Purim. And the second day of Purim, Yom Tov Sheni of Purim, which fills it out, that's Yud Dalet at the end of the next year. I don't claim to understand what Rav Judah Mishael is saying, and I certainly don't claim to fully understand it without being drunk on Purim, But something that I take out of it from it is, To recognize, we can't live in Purim all year round. It's not healthy, it's not normal, it's not a good thing. But we should be living in Chol Hamoed Purim all year round. That we should be doing. And there's so much of beautiful avodah to do on Purim, so much to internalize, to take out, to bring into myself on Purim. And if I do, then it should stay with me. That clarity! If I'm able to bring it inside of myself into my life, it should stay with me for the whole year, when I descend back down into the water, when I descend back down into reality, and into the physicality, and into a reality of a post etadas to our world, that I'm able to hold on to a taste of Purim, that gets me through the whole year. That gets me through all of that Cholmoed Purim and all the way back to Yedalot. Which will be Zohet to be able to breathe in Purim, to drink in Purim, to be able internally, regardless of how we get there, to get to a place of Adel Oyada, beyond Daas, to touch that oneness and the beauty of HaKadosh all levels, to be Shalom HaKadosh Baruch Hu in myself, in Him, in the world, with my friends, in all ways, and through that be able to live. Live like a Purim Jew all year round. That is Rath Hashem. Chag Sameach, everybody. Thank you so much for tuning into this week's episode. If you enjoyed the episode, please rate the podcast and hit the follow button. And join us every Wednesday for a new episode on the Parsha. Once again, thank you so much to this week's sponsor. And a reminder that you too can sponsor an episode of the podcast. Email rabbicharnoff at gmail. com for more info or to share any thoughts, comments, or feedback on this week's episode. See you in the next one.