Jennipod
It's ya girl Jennifer, ya know, from Fairfield.
Jennipod
Jennipod Episode 16: My Sinuses Are Stuffed But My Stories Aren't
• Nashville's hot chicken comes with a warning: plan your next day around bathroom access
• Dog-sitting a female Lab has revealed why Bob Barker's spay/neuter message remains relevant
• Movie quotes from The Hangover, Big Daddy, and The Notebook have become household language
• Brief encounters with celebrities including Mary Lou Retton and Connie Britton in Nashville
• Poor peripheral vision potentially linked to gymnastics training affects everyday activities
• Scientists have genetically engineered Dire wolves back after 13,000 years but still no dinosaurs
• Cedar Point's roller coaster technology has evolved dramatically in 20 years with magnetic hyper coasters
• The Top Thrill 2 strata coaster represents a level of thrill that might exceed personal limits
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What's up everyone. Welcome to episode 16 of JennaPod. Today is Saturday, april 19th. If my voice sounds horrendous, it's because I've been rocking a sinus infection since Wednesday rocking a sinus infection since Wednesday. I could have waited a week or delayed the podcast, but listen, I am here for the fans. I haven't had a sinus infection in maybe 9 to 10 years. I had one every year of my life and then they stopped. I'm just using Yield Sudafed and rinsing out my sinuses hot. I googled the best states for allergy sufferers and they are Utah, nevada, wyoming, arizona and Colorado. So catch me out west where the cars aren't yellow with pollen as I organize my notes for this podcast and write this up.
Speaker 1:I decided to come to a coffee shop near my home in Nolensville, tennessee. Small town vibes growing really fast. This place is a madhouse. I didn't even know if I was going to have somewhere to sit and shout out to the guy who got a cup of coffee and sat down next to me and was just reading a hardbound book, not even a Kindle. This place sounds like a Metallica concert, but sure, let's read.
Speaker 1:I got a blueberry muffin as a little treat-to, and why? Because it's just crumbling everywhere and spiking my blood sugar. Please, jesus, don't give me the diabetes. I doubt I will get the diabetes because the only sweets I keep in my home are Dove Dark chocolates and they are kept in the freezer. I actually just redid my pantry and decided to not keep any shelf-stable food in my house because we never use it. So now I'm really not prepared for the zombie apocalypse. We're going to have to pray that there's power and we can use the air fryer. Now I am keeping my guilty pleasure, and that is a four pack of shin spicy noodle soup, aka ramen, aka college food. I maybe eat two a month and I fucking love it. Zero nutritional value, so that is also why it's a little treat-o for Matami. Now, I love spicy food.
Speaker 1:Nashville is known for hot chicken. Everyone wants to come to Nashville for the hot chicken, but many don't realize hot chicken equals next day hot chicken poops where you have to plan your life around it. I've eaten hot chicken, and I mean where you are sweating and need milk, but I ensure I will be at home at my home-based toilet after enjoying such activities. I've eaten hot chicken on a Friday and then showed up to the gym Saturday morning to work out. Never again. Lesson learned I can poop anywhere. Zero poop fear here. But you don't want the hot chicken poops with your gym buddies, that feeling of 1,000 needles poking your colon. Doesn't scream, let's do a burpee. Okay, enough, doo-doo talk, hashtag, take your fiber.
Speaker 1:I left the house because we are dog-sitting an extra black lab named Lila. We have watched Lila many times, all good experiences. However, it's chaos. I already have one black dog, velcro to me, so adding a second thick girl to the batch wasn't adding to a creative space. Now let's bring up my puppy's balls again, for like the 10th time the German short-haired pointer turned one last a week, so it's just about time to snippy, snip the balls. But I wanted to wait until after Miss Lila went home, because we don't want open wounds in WWE wrestling. But let's just say the pub isn't used to having a lady in the home and he and his little pickle are enjoying all opportunities to hump any part of her body available. Miss Lila is fixed, but this is why Bob Barker educated us at the end of every episode of the Price is Right.
Speaker 1:I am personally not being the grandmother to 10 accidental GSPs. Not up in here. If you ever randomly yell not up in here. That is because of the movie the Hangover. We recently popped that movie on and I love that. I say popped because I'm referencing popping a VHS into a VHS player. So we watched the Hangover and damn, it's still as funny as when it came out in 2009. In my home, the movies the Hangover, old School and Wedding Crashers are constantly spoken and have become a part of our nomenclature. See, there's that sexy word again. One other line from a movie I constantly say is from Big Daddy with Adam Sandler, and that's you're not proposing, are you? This can be in any scenario, anywhere.
Speaker 1:I also do the part from the notebook where Noah Calhoun, aka baby daddy Ryan Gosling, asks Rachel McAdams what do you want? I play both parts in this scene. She said it's not that simple and he says God damn it. What do you want? Now? This can be a question like what do you want for dinner tonight? And then I turn on the scene. If Ryan Gosling is listening, I swear I will act normal when I meet you, psych.
Speaker 1:Does anyone have a good story of meeting their celebrity crush? I have only met a handful of famous people. I got out of school in either third or fourth grade to go meet decorated Olympic gymnast Mary Lou Retton. I've met Bella Caroli and Amanda Borden, also from the gymnastics world. When I first moved to Nashville, I was at the Juice Bar in Brantwood and actress Connie Britton walked in with her kid and I was the only other person there and this was right when the show Nashville came out. So I was like, okay, this is wicked cool. Didn't get pictures, didn't say hi, no autograph, but I was like I'm in Nashville, I've made it.
Speaker 1:One of my biggest celebrity sports regrets was being in Kansas City in 2009 to watch the Reds play, and the morning we were leaving, the Reds were staying in our hotel. Brandon Phillips was in the lobby dressed way too fancy and I was too nervous to go say hi. Now, when I cheered for the Titans, there were a couple famous people or groups singing the national anthem, but I can't recall who because game days were insane and then it was normally a quick picture with them after the song was over. But there are so many famous people now you can't keep up. Someone in this coffee shop could have 10 million YouTube subscribers. I have zero YouTube subscribers, but also I don't have a YouTube channel. If I have seen an A-list person? I can't recall, so it has to be no right. Anyway, let me know on IG who you have met in person, like a real interaction.
Speaker 1:Pickleball has become very popular. Is it an activity? Is it a sport? I'll let people on the internet argue about that, but I have no hand-eye coordination to pursue this activity Like. No, jennifer, it's for everyone, it's not. It's not. I'm not going to waste anyone's time missing, hit after hit after hit.
Speaker 1:Am I somewhat athletic? Sure, I read an article about how gymnast vision is developed. I was a gymnast until I was 12. Gymnastics is very centered focus and it was like I never trained my peripheral vision growing up like, let's say, someone playing baseball would, and my peripheral vision is terrible. Now, this all may be poppycock, but I think it makes sense. I wonder if this is why I get car sick so easily.
Speaker 1:According to Wikipedia, peripheral vision or indirect vision is the vision as it occurs outside the point of fixation, ie away from the center of the gaze or when viewed at large angles in the corner of one's eye. The loss of peripheral vision while retaining central vision is known as tunnel vision. Well, what do you know? That's where the phrase tunnel vision comes from. Did you know that I didn't? That's where the phrase tunnel vision comes from. Did you know that I didn't? Central vision is relatively weak in the dark, so, yeah, that's why I can't read y'all's Instagram stories at night in bed.
Speaker 1:I need to reschedule my eye appointment, so I'll have to ask the eye doctor about all these eyeball theories. I canceled my eye appointment this week and four hours later the place was robbed and they stole designer frames. So maybe I could have stopped that. I doubt it. I don't know what am I going to do in that situation? Probably hide, I'd hope not. Hide, I'd hope not. But TBD on me catching the thieves. It's been a week and I still haven't watched the last episode of Reacher, but I did get two episodes further in Paradise. I'm not obsessed with Paradise, but I'm very intrigued with it, and they do love a plot twist.
Speaker 1:My mom's podcast corrections from last week. She said I do not watch American Idol or the Voice. Your father does, and he mentioned to me that Carrie ruined the show, and then I said she has zero personality. Sharon is savage. Also, this week we were discussing movies and my parents told me that Netflix had nothing good to rent right now. And my brain glitched. I said you can't rent movies on Netflix and they said yes, you can. And then I was like, do I not know how Netflix works? And then I said, do you mean Prime? And then they said no, we mean YouTube. Anyway, I finally did convince them that you can't rent movies on Netflix. Lord Jesus, movies on Netflix. Lord Jesus, help me with the boomers.
Speaker 1:My husband doesn't have a real ID but gave me a great real ID story this week. I assume most men won't take the time to go get one until their license or passport expires. My husband's passport expires in 2029, so I already have an alert in my phone for the summer of 2028 to get that show started. This week for work he went to the Robbins Air Force Base in Georgia for a trade show. Now all the America states have adopted the Real ID at different time periods. Georgia started in 2012. Tennessee didn't start until 2019, hence why the DMVs have been batshit the past three months as the May 7th federal deadline is close, months as the May 7th federal deadline is close.
Speaker 1:He had to get a guest pass to get on the base. He said it was basically like the DMV he had to show his car registration, car insurance and a picture ID. Well, they wouldn't accept his Tennessee license so he had to get a sponsor, aka someone from the trade show. I guess like someone being like, yeah, he's legit. He signed up. He had to have two Air Force police escort him to the trade show. It was a 45-minute fiasco. They were late setting up the trade show and the Air Force cops told him he couldn't go anywhere on base without them knowing.
Speaker 1:The current commander of the base asked my husband if he sold all types of office furniture and my husband said no, we just take care of your butt and your back, of your butt and your back. So if you are attending a military base in the US not just on a tour, a tur, a tour you better have that Real ID ready. Now someone sent me an article this week that we are closer than we think to just having biometrics at the airport, like you're at TSA. You just walk through a scanner and they're like yep, that's Jennifer. So, yeah, maybe that's why they wanted my weight. Bring it on AITSA, whatever gets me to my gate early to people watch Direwolves.
Speaker 1:This past week the news broke that a US-based company has taken a step aimed at bringing the direwolf back from oblivion. According to USA Today, dallas-based Colossal Biosciences has announced the birth of three genetically engineered wolf pups, all with striking white fur, created with the help of ancient DNA obtained from the fossilized remains of the extinct animals. They went extinct 13,000 years ago, so this company basically created little dire wolf embryos with the help of gray wolf cells and then implanted them into surrogate domesticated dog mothers. Like who is the lucky dog that got to do that? So like cool, but where are my fucking dinosaurs? We have enough wolves and dogs. I know I have three in my home right now. Give me a T-Rex. The Komodo dragon is the largest lizard in the world and can grow up to 10 feet long and weigh between 150 and 300 pounds. But can a Komodo dragon carry a brontosaurus embryo?
Speaker 1:I asked AI and it said scientists are exploring the possibility of bringing back dinosaurs, but current technology does not allow for it. Efforts are focused on studying ancient DNA and using genetic techniques, but viable dinosaur DNA has not been found yet. What are they doing out there? This information just ruined my day. We sent Katy Perry to space this week, but we can't figure out dino DNA. Bless Katy Perry. The internet done did her in this week. There is a $150,000 deposit to get on a Blue Origin flight, so it seems I may be out on the count for this activity. Now, given this opportunity and it being free, are you the listeners flying up into space for 11 minutes? I'm going to say there is no way I'm getting into a rocket. In my middle ages, however, I'll go to a real Jurassic Park when they figure out this dino DNA shit. It better be before I die.
Speaker 1:In September of 2023, my family in Cleveland, ohio, took me to Hollow Weekend at Cedar Point, which is located on the Lake Erie Peninsula in Sandusky, ohio, and I needed NASA training to emotionally handle what was to come. If you are a roller coaster enthusiast, this is the place to be, because they have 17 roller coasters, so I would totally highly recommend a weekend trip there. This is the place to be because they have 17 roller coasters, so I would totally highly recommend a weekend trip there. Now, growing up, I was an amusement park girly. We had season passes to Kings Island. Kings Island is northeast of Cincinnati, in Mason Ohio. My dad had to bribe me with money when I was young to get on roller coasters, but after that I was all in. I went to Cedar Point in 2004 because of a college graduation party weekend and then I don't think I rode a roller coaster again until that fateful night in September of 2023 when my family took me back there.
Speaker 1:Now, with the Halloween themed weekends, the park doesn't open until 6 pm and closes at mid mid midnight, and, as everyone knows, I personally go to bed at 8 30 pm. So this was already a challenging situation. They also have a billion haunted houses to go through and like really, really good ones that scare the shit out of you. So I'm getting prepared for the coasters. I've taken my Dramamine. What I wasn't prepared for was how the technology of coasters has changed in 20 years. Oh, they're all magnetic now and referred to as hypercoasters.
Speaker 1:My family was so psyched for me to ride. I mentioned this is all happening at night, but did I mention they turn all the lights off for the roller coasters? Imagine already being terrified and then being shot out at 120 miles per hour in the pitch black and having no idea what's going on. We rode two coasters and went through one haunted house and I had to tell my family time out, I need to go sit somewhere quiet. My nervous system is in shock. We rode coasters and went through haunted houses for six hours. We had fast passes the only way to go. Did we obtain them legally? That's not my place to say. My cousin's sister, megan, said my favorite part of the night was watching you lose your shit on every single ride. I felt hungover the next day.
Speaker 1:If you are familiar with Cedar Point, you know of their famous ride, the Top Thrill Dragster. I did get to ride this in 2004, and it's insane. There was nothing like it. This year they have redone the ride and are now calling it Top Thrill 2, the world's tallest and fastest triple launch strata coaster. According to Coasterpedianet sounds like a secure website. A strata coaster is a complete circuit roller coaster that is between 400 and 499 feet tall. There are only two in the world, with another one in Jersey called Kingda Ka, so Humblebrack.
Speaker 1:I have been on a strata coaster, but I was 22 and probably walking around the park drinking draft beer. I sent my cousin, sister Megan, an Instagram video the other day and it looked like a soft preview of Top Thrill 2. Maybe some coaster influencers were on it and I told her there is no fucking way I am getting on that and she's like yes, you are. No, ma'am, I'll be in the gift shops drinking my $25 souvenir boozy beverage. Please go Google this attraction, can you handle it? That's what she said. All right, everyone, have a great pollen-free week.