Jennipod
It's ya girl Jennifer, ya know, from Fairfield.
Jennipod
Jennipod Episode 24: Oops I'm Just a Girl
• Ear piercings when one decides to bleed uncontrollably
• Investigating food constantly getting stuck in teeth as a new middle age phenomenon
• Spending $1,600 on a dog door to eliminate the constant letting dogs in and out
• Contrasting AAA experiences: terrible response for a battery issue vs. excellent service for a flat tire
• Red Lobster's exciting revival with new menu items and $5 drinks worth checking out
• Discovering the joys of Amazon tanning mousse after years of embracing paleness
• Looking forward to robot taxis with their affordable $4.20 flat fee compared to expensive rideshares
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What's up everyone? Welcome to episode 24 of JennaPod. I'm Jennifer. What's up, baby? I am recording this.
Speaker 1:Wednesday, july 2nd. It's America's week, baby, usa, usa. So are we all surviving this hot ass, melting weather? Only one day my HVAC was like girl. We cannot do this. But other than that, thank you, hvac gods for the AC not going out. Let's continue that through the next week.
Speaker 1:Do you think June will be our only heat wave or do you think we will have another one? I've already seen people counting down to football season. That's fine. I guess that new Titan Stadium better be ready in about a year. Is Nissan keeping the name Nissan Stadium? By the way, who is buying Nissans? And, for the love of God, you people who posted on June 25th six months until Christmas shut the fuck up. Just kidding. I know it makes you happy and that makes me happy. I would like a Roomba for Christmas. Thank you. The Cincinnati Reds are on fire right now. Ayyy, okay, fourth in the National League Central Division. I don't think I've learned any players' names, but I do enjoy yelling Ellie De La Cruz at the TV at least three times a night.
Speaker 1:Ladies, how are we doing with our ear piercings? This past Sunday I was getting cleaned up to go to my parents' house and I thought, oh, I'll put in these little stud earrings that I've literally had for 30 years. I have double piercings. I think I did the second piercings when I was 30, alongside with my mother. I do want to get a third row, so another piercing above the double piercing.
Speaker 1:My skin is very allergic to all earrings. I put Aquaphor first on my earlobes and then I also put Aquaphor on the stems of the earrings. I would love nothing more than to get a micro, teeny, tiny nose ring, but I cannot imagine what my skin would do, even with the aquaphor, like earrings, max eight hours and I don't need people walking up to me and saying what the hell is wrong with your face if I had a nose ring. So anyway, on days I put earrings in. It is a gamble of what's going to happen. My upper piercing on my right side some days likes to act like it's not pierced at all, like it's never had an earring, like we are doing the scene from Grease where they pierce Sandy's ear at the sleepover. So on Sunday I barely barely touched the hole that's what she said and blood starts going everywhere Like did I hit my femoral artery. That doesn't even make sense anatomically for this story, but an entire tissue filled with blood. For fuck's sake, all I wanted to do was put an earring in and not have to perform first aid on myself. Oh, and the stress of being dressed up for an event like a wedding and this happening Cocktail dress, fire makeup, fire hair cue, the ear, bleeding everywhere, when you needed to be in the car five minutes ago. Am I alone in this fight? Do I need to get the hole repierced? Catch me at Claire's at the mall soon, getting those fifth and sixth holes.
Speaker 1:We had a new country added to our stats Cayman Islands. New country added to our stats, cayman Islands. Man, y'all be traveling and I'm jealous. An all-inclusive resort sounds amazing and I don't even need all the booze, just some sun, some naps, a spa and my Kindle. I think we are actually supposed to go to an all-inclusive next April for a 50th birthday TBD.
Speaker 1:The last time I went to an all-inclusive resort in Mexico was 2009. I was 27 and I could drink all day. One day at the pool, I recall I was given a double whiskey and coke because why not? Then got cleaned up for dinner. I then had to walk out of the dinner, go into the lobby, puke and then walked back into dinner and continued to party. If you have never puked and rallied, it's a real thing.
Speaker 1:I think I've mentioned on here I've read where younger generations aren't binge drinking as much and good on you. The amount of ibuprofen I had to take between the years 2000 and 2010 to combat hangovers alone could kill an elephant. I don't know if that's accurate information. It's a stat I made up for this story. Do that AI? Okay, the dog door is getting installed Friday, july 11th. Let's fucking go.
Speaker 1:If you want to know the price of the dog door, you can join my Patreon for $5 a month. Just kidding, who has time to manage that? Our door is standard size. Luckily, it has an extra large dog door and with a window built in with the blinds inside the window. So with the cost of supplies and installation, it's going to cost $1,600. Yes, I was hoping for more like $1,200 to $1,500, but I don't think you understand how many times a day I open my kitchen door to let a dog out or let a dog in. But the German Shorthaired Pointer let a dog out or let a dog in, but the German short-haired pointer, he can open the back door himself because it's a lever handle. So when the heat index is 110, like this week, or negative three degrees, you can see where this becomes a royal pain in the ass. It's a splurge for the house that we haven't fixed up at all, but it is going to save hours of frustration, and that back door was ghetto as hell anyway. So bye. I'll probably be able to give an update two to three episodes from now. My 19 year old goblin cat's litter box is in the vicinity of the new doggy door, so let's just pray she isn't entering and then gets clotheslined on the way to go tinkle.
Speaker 1:I have a question for those in the Middle Ages. I swear. On a daily basis I am getting food stuck in my teeth and this has never happened. Is it because my teeth are moving? I never had braces, humble brag. I had my wisdom teeth taken out right before COVID. Now I do have a large gap between my front teeth. I haven't done it in a couple decades, but I can put a candy sprinkle between my gap and it will stay. I think that would be my America's Got Talent skit sponsored by TCBY. So I've had purse ibuprofen for a couple years now, but it sounds like it's time to add toothpicks. Does Louis Vuitton have a toothpick holder? Because I think that would be my first Louis Vuitton purchase.
Speaker 1:A couple weeks ago I was having tooth pain in my lower right molar and I was freaked out because I've never really had tooth pain. I go to the dentist, he blows some air into it and he says does that hurt? I'm like, yep. So I was thinking, oh, I need a filling, redone or a root canal. And he's like do you tend to overreact at tooth pain? I'm like bro, bro, little baby bro. Um, this is my first time coming in for tooth pain. And he goes girl, you need to switch to Sensodyne toothpaste. So my sissy over-whitened teeth strike again. I have been using a charcoal whitening toothpaste and my teeth were like ma'am, we can't do this. So for the second time in my life, I'm back on my sensitive toothpaste bullshit.
Speaker 1:Now, speaking on Louis Vuitton, have you all heard of LeBoubous? I thought it had something to do with Louis Vuitton or Christian Louboutins, is that how you say it? Aka the Red Bottom Heels? No, it's little fugly stuffed animals. Celebrities like Rihanna, dua Lipa and Kim K are clipping to their purses, according to Forbescom, fuzzy little creatures have taken over TikTok and Instagram with the advent of 2025's unexpected fashion trend Laboo Boo Monster Dolls.
Speaker 1:Laboo Boo Dolls are monsters from a children's book series that leaped into the mainstream, exploding into a trendy fashion accessory and desirable collection. The secret sauce to Labubu's popularity might be the quote blind boxes they are sold in, in which the color of Labubu is revealed only when the doll is unboxed, adding to the excitement of unwrapping a rare figure. Variety and Today said the dolls cost between $13 and $16, but can resale up to $700 depending on the rarity. So it's the Beanie Baby craze, but it's 2025. And we all know we have a boomer out there hanging on to their Princess Diana Beanie Baby thinking it's going to pay off their mortgage Hashtag.
Speaker 1:No. So go ahead and Google LaBooBoos and take a look, and you're just going to be like what is that? I have a AAA redemption story. I have had a AAA membership for like 16 years, and why do I keep it? Because your girl has no idea anything about cars. Wikipedia says the American Automobile Association was founded in 1902 in Chicago, illinois, in response to the lack of roads and highways suitable for automobiles. They then started publishing road maps, hotel guides, and they also helped curate many school driving programs. Aaa is the reason we have vehicle identification numbers on our cars to deter theft. Anywho, back to the reason I pay $172 a year is for oh no, I'm just a girl problems.
Speaker 1:Back in October I was driving two friends down to Alabama for a wedding. We met in Thompson Station, tennessee, at another friend's house, which, in rush hour, is about 45 minutes away. I was excited to see my friends when I pulled up and I didn't realize it, but I left my car running while we had to run into the house to grab things for our friend. Now, I have done this before, but when I got back in the car, I forgot it was running and I pushed the start button and the brake at the same time and my car went berserk. And my car went berserk Lights flickering, chaos. It was dead as a doornail. No worries, I said. Then the narrator said she should have been worried. I have AAA.
Speaker 1:Well, it was 7pm on a Thursday night and I called and went on the app and they were like sure, someone's on their way. And then it was like, okay, okay, someone's gonna be there in two hours. Um, what? My friends kelly and kelsey, and I attempted to jump the car but it didn't work. So eventually my husband drove the 25 miles south and jumped the car in 90 seconds. I had kept checking the app and calling and a very nice older man was like oh yeah, there's only two of us contracted car dudes working tonight. Anyway, we got on our way but I was pissed I thought I was paying $172 a year for emergencies. Again, thank God we weren't far from Nashville and in a random place with scurry people. We even stopped for snacks at a gas station and I never turned the car off because we were afraid it would die. Aaa roadside assistance sent me a survey like how did we do? And I was like fuck off, zero out of 10. You never showed up.
Speaker 1:Fast forward to the Friday before last. Me and my gym squad go to Waldo's Chicken in Brentwood quite often, so I've parked there probably 50 times Now. I've never had a speeding ticket and the only wreck I have ever been in was in my high school parking lot, probably in 1998. But your girl gets a d minus for parking. But as I spoke in a previous episode, I now blame everything on my binocular vision dysfunction. Have I sideswiped my car twice on the side of a garage. Perhaps.
Speaker 1:I pull into the Waldo's parking lot, pulling into the left, and there's a curb on the right side and I proceed to hit the curb. Maybe I kind of slammed into the curb Now I've hit a thousand curbs because I'm just a girl, but this one was kind of jolting like we got airborne. I just flipped my hair and said, oops, well, I get out of the car and I hear shh, and I watched my tire go flat, l-o-l I think. I called AAA right away and they sent me a link and then I got an update and they're like there is a dude 17 minutes away and I could follow him on a map. I went in, ate my chicky sandwich and french fries and then the nicest, most professional, sweetest man put my spare tire on my car in like four minutes. He said don't get on the interstate and don't go over 50 miles an hour. So complete opposite experience that of my first call I had to make back in October. 12 out of 10. And luckily my tires were under warranty so I got a new one for $39. So anyway, the lesson we have learned is yes, do keep the AAA roadside assistance, but just remember if your car battery dies, make sure you have a cell phone backup battery in your car, in your purse, because, as we have discussed in previous episode, you got to be prepared.
Speaker 1:Be a prepper. The red lobster hype is real. Who has gone? I saw an Instagram post of a friend. She went there with her son, my college roommate Lauren. Her son and husband went twice in one day while they were down in Florida. The Black community online is going to save this franchise alone With the promise of seafood, boil bags, sangria, flights and $5 drinks. You can't beat it. I hope to take a girlfriend there after the 4th of July holiday.
Speaker 1:The new CEO is 36-year-old Damola Ademalukun and he has been on the tiki talki and the Instagram hyping up the new changes. Now I will say it ain't cheap to eat at Red Lobster, but I need people to get out in their suburbs and support the cause. Hashtag Save Red Lobster. Okay, couple of last thoughts. We are going to see the new Jurassic Park movie today, this evening on opening day, with my parents, because that's what we do. Give me gay Jonathan Bailey all day. Give me some Scar Jo muscles. No dinosaur movie will ever top the original Jurassic Park, but it sure as hell can top the second and third movies that came out. Those were so bad. Catch me getting type 2 diabetes with my extra large popcorn and two liters of coke. Now this is an action movie, so TBD on me taking my Dramamine beforehand.
Speaker 1:I have embraced being a pale polar bear girl for the past 15 years and I can't take it any longer. So I bought an organic tanning mousse on Amazon. I also had to buy a tanning mitten and I tell you what folks confidence is up. I'm wearing shorts Now. I can't reach all of my back, so don't look at my back. If you see me in public, just don't look at it. Large pale area alert. So if you are interested, go to my Amazon storefront and check it out.
Speaker 1:I read the Tesla taxi has a $4.20 flat fee. Are you kidding me? How much are the Waymos? I once requested an Uber to go from downtown Nashville to home and it was $75, and I've heard it gets up to $200 on New Year's Eve. Bring on the cheapo robot taxis. Can the robot taxi go through a drive-thru and get me Treetos? See, this is when we also need Gary, the referee Terminator robot, because the robot he can be inside the robot taxi. He can go to Taco Bell at 2 am and hand the Taco Bell to me and everyone's happy. I mentioned.
Speaker 1:It stresses me out when I see women applying makeup while they are driving. I was headed to my office last week and came up behind a Subaru at a red light. A woman with very long hair for two minutes was straight up teasing tease, tease, tease, tease, hairspray, hairspraypray, hairspray. Like it was the filming for a Def Leppard music video Tease spray, tease, spray. I was like go off girl, but also confused. I hope she felt snatched going to that in-person meeting and got the damn deal done. Anyone notice?
Speaker 1:Jodi Messina is having a moment on social media, kind of a resurgence, if you will. I love her music. If you have ever been to karaoke with me over the past 20 years, you know my go-to song is I'm Alright, he goes well. It's been a long time. Glad to see your face. You know it. You know it. That song came out in 1998 when I was 16 years old. If you are a mediocre singer, her tunes are so easy to sing along to and a crowd favorite, especially here in Music City, tennessee. I haven't sang it in five years and may the gods bless me this 4th of July weekend with the Japanese art of karaoke. All right y'all.
Speaker 2:Thank you for listening to episode 24, and I hope you have a great week episode 24, and I hope you have a great week, thank you.
