Speaker 1: Good morning.
Speaker 1: So I got to tell you that when I walked in here I actually looked at Lori and said, man, I thought there'd be less people here today.
Speaker 1: This is a first for me in a while, so I'm just going to ask that you bear with me a little bit.
Speaker 1: It's a new experience at Connect for me to do this.
Speaker 1: So let's go ahead and stand for the reading of the Word.
Speaker 1: The Word comes out of Jeremiah today.
Speaker 1: Jeremiah 1, verse 5.
Speaker 1: It says I knew you before.
Speaker 1: I formed you in your mother's womb, before you were born.
Speaker 1: I set you apart and appointed you as a prophet of my nations.
Speaker 1: And we're also going to jump down a little bit to Jeremiah 29, 11.
Speaker 1: For I know the plans I have for you, say the Lord.
Speaker 1: They're plans for good and not disaster, to give you a future and hope.
Speaker 1: So I got to tell you when Pastor sent me a text over Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1: He said I know you're all busy, but I have a question.
Speaker 1: Didn't you say you had experience preaching?
Speaker 1: It was a real quick phone call right after that.
Speaker 1: I said I do not have experience preaching.
Speaker 1: I have been known to speak every once in a while.
Speaker 1: He said can you do it?
Speaker 1: I said give me a date.
Speaker 1: He gave me the date and I said yeah, I can do that.
Speaker 1: I hung up and I looked at Lori and I went whew, what did I just say?
Speaker 1: And then it hit me Go ahead and please sit, please.
Speaker 1: It hit me.
Speaker 1: The same thing that reoccurred multiple times in my life I'm not good enough to do this, I'm not called to be a preacher, I'm not called to be a pastor.
Speaker 1: I'm not good enough, and that's been reiterated throughout my life.
Speaker 1: Every time I've made a step forward, I've been reminded I'm not good enough for God.
Speaker 1: So what I want to do today is I just want to share a personal story.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 1: Nothing great revelation, just hopefully something that will resonate with somebody in here.
Speaker 1: My question for you today is are you good enough for God?
Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you how I answered this question, but first I've got to go back a little bit.
Speaker 1: I'm going to let you know due to sake of time, because Dale's hungry.
Speaker 1: He already told me that we're going to jump some of this.
Speaker 1: Okay, hopefully you can follow along with me.
Speaker 1: See, I was raised in a Catholic church.
Speaker 1: My whole life I was an altar boy.
Speaker 1: I went to Mass.
Speaker 1: I went to altar boy, I went to Mass, went to Christmas Eve, went to all the services, did all the sacraments and then one day this girl showed up at my high school and her dad.
Speaker 1: I had to laugh when Vernon said that today.
Speaker 1: Her dad said if you want to date my daughter, you need to go to the Baptist church.
Speaker 1: And here's the deal for you, bill For every hour you're in church, you get one hour with my daughter.
Speaker 1: How many of y'all remember the old Baptist church?
Speaker 1: I was there Sunday morning.
Speaker 1: I was there Sunday for Sunday school, sunday morning, for services, sunday night, wednesday and any other time I could be there.
Speaker 1: And the deal was, if I hit all four services, all four hours, he'd double it.
Speaker 1: So that means I could go out with her on Friday night and Saturday.
Speaker 1: Okay, granted, I picked her up at 6.
Speaker 1: She was home by 10 because that was the rule.
Speaker 1: But what I got out of that is that's where I met Jesus for the first time.
Speaker 1: That wasn't my intention, but that's what I got.
Speaker 1: I got to experience Jesus.
Speaker 1: I got to experience the love that he had.
Speaker 1: I come to know him.
Speaker 1: I go in the military, I go overseas, I go into combat, I see stuff, I'll just stop there.
Speaker 1: I go into combat.
Speaker 1: I see stuff, I'll just stop there and I walk away from God, like many people in the military do, because we think how can God exist if this is what he does?
Speaker 1: Because what we don't realize is that's not God.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's not God.
Speaker 1: Several years go by, I come back and I meet this amazing little Pentecostal girl.
Speaker 1: Okay, she's right in the back now.
Speaker 1: After we get married, the benefit was my little Pentecostal girlfriend was backslidden, so it fit my standards of life.
Speaker 1: After we get married, a little bit later, we decide that we need to attend church, because that's what all good parents do, right?
Speaker 1: You take your kids to church.
Speaker 1: So we make a deal and I say here's the deal, I'm not going to a crazy church like your mom and dad go to, which is the Assembly of God church.
Speaker 1: And she said that's great.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to exercise church like your parents do, which is a Catholic church.
Speaker 1: So we conclude that we're going to go to an American Baptist church.
Speaker 1: She finds it.
Speaker 1: We go.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, here's another Baptist church.
Speaker 1: You know, southern Baptist is all about the rules, the legalism, all of that stuff.
Speaker 1: We go into the American Baptist Church.
Speaker 1: We go to a Christmas party.
Speaker 1: I walk in and the pastor's having a drink.
Speaker 1: I thought I'm home, I can deal with this, okay.
Speaker 1: So we do that.
Speaker 1: We move forward.
Speaker 1: We get married.
Speaker 1: I go to seminary.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry it was.
Speaker 1: I was going to study marriage and family therapy at American Baptist Seminary.
Speaker 1: I get there and everything that I do lines up with becoming a pastor.
Speaker 1: I go to take a class.
Speaker 1: It's study of the Old Testament.
Speaker 1: Take a class.
Speaker 1: It's study of the Old Testament.
Speaker 1: Take a class study of the New Testament.
Speaker 1: Take a class.
Speaker 1: I went.
Speaker 1: You know what?
Speaker 1: I'm here to be a therapist.
Speaker 1: So I do what every good young Christian man does I go to a state school, I transfer and I pack my stuff and I go.
Speaker 1: I get done with my schooling.
Speaker 1: The whole time that we're going I'm working nights.
Speaker 1: Lori's attending an Assembly of God church and we move.
Speaker 1: We move to a place in Montana Mile City where Lori won.
Speaker 1: She said Bill, we want to go to this church.
Speaker 1: Go to this church, get out there.
Speaker 1: I get involved with youth.
Speaker 1: I don't know why, but for some reason God really hit me when I went to that church.
Speaker 1: What I got to experience that I never experienced before was the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 1: I got to experience the love that God had for me.
Speaker 1: I started growing, I started doing things.
Speaker 1: Lori's favorite picture of me is at a church camp and she says I'm just glowing because God is in there with me.
Speaker 1: So I said all right, obviously, everything you've done.
Speaker 1: God has directed me to pursue ministry.
Speaker 1: So I start doing everything required by the religion denomination to become a pastor, start pursuing this, and then I'm stopped.
Speaker 1: I'm told one thing you can't be a pastor, you can't be clergy in this church.
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 1: Because I've been divorced.
Speaker 1: Because what I didn't tell you is that when I was in the military doing military things, I conceived a child out of wedlock in a Muslim country and I married the woman.
Speaker 1: Come back.
Speaker 1: It didn't work.
Speaker 1: We got a divorce.
Speaker 1: According to the domination, you can't be a pastor if you're divorced back then.
Speaker 1: So what was I told?
Speaker 1: This was the first time that somebody confirmed that I wasn't good enough.
Speaker 1: You're not good enough for God because you've been divorced.
Speaker 1: Good enough, you're not good enough for God because you've been divorced.
Speaker 1: You'll hear me sarcastically say every once in a while that in that denomination God forgave all sin except for divorce.
Speaker 1: I'm glad that that's not the truth.
Speaker 1: After this I withdraw from everything and became what I affectionately call a professional artist.
Speaker 1: People don't know I'm an artist.
Speaker 1: I sat in the back pew of that church for the next year or two and colored with my children.
Speaker 1: I was still in church, sort of, but I sat there and colored because I was so angry.
Speaker 1: The pastor there asked me one day because I have a CDL.
Speaker 1: He said hey, will you try to drive the church bus to Kansas City for us?
Speaker 1: There's an event going on at International House of Prayer that we want to take the teens to.
Speaker 1: I was a little reluctant and he actually told me.
Speaker 1: He said I don't care what you do, because he knew where I was.
Speaker 1: As long as you're able to drive there and drive back, I will not bother you.
Speaker 1: The rest of the time you're there, I'll get you your own room.
Speaker 1: You can do whatever you want.
Speaker 1: We need a driver.
Speaker 1: He said this is great, I'll do this.
Speaker 1: While we were there, there's this young lady she's a young lady now that we knew that was in the youth group that asked me to go to a couple services with her.
Speaker 1: We did that and I felt God again.
Speaker 1: I felt the Spirit convict me again.
Speaker 1: My whole plans for that weekend changed because now I'm going to this teen conference and every time I go I feel the Spirit, I feel a calling, I feel something.
Speaker 1: I feel something.
Speaker 1: And they said hey, you know, we have this program here at the International House of Prayer called Intro to IHOP.
Speaker 1: It's a four-month program.
Speaker 1: You come down here, you just dig into the word.
Speaker 1: I go back to Lauren.
Speaker 1: I said, hey, babe, guess what?
Speaker 1: I think we're going to close our business, sell our house and move to Kansas City for four months.
Speaker 1: And she said where are you going to live?
Speaker 1: I said, pastor, over there at that church has a camper.
Speaker 1: He said we could live in it.
Speaker 1: So we proceeded to pack up all of our stuff, put it in storage, take my five kids and my loving wife and move to Independence, missouri into the slummiest area we could find in our pop-up camper area.
Speaker 1: We could find in our pop-up camper, but it was here in Kansas City.
Speaker 1: You know, when you spend six, seven hours a day in a prayer room on your face with God, he does things.
Speaker 1: And man, we had growth.
Speaker 1: I had a daughter that was totally upset that we moved there because I took her from all her friends.
Speaker 1: I had a son that was totally engaged.
Speaker 1: I had a wife that was in tears constantly because she sees what God's doing and I'm all in, I'm sold.
Speaker 1: We do our four months there, we move back, stay with the family.
Speaker 1: While we're with this family, we start a prayer room Every Monday night.
Speaker 1: We'd go into a small church and we'd do four or five hours of intercessory prayer.
Speaker 1: Once again.
Speaker 1: When you're praying like that, god's moving.
Speaker 1: When you surround yourself with people, with God, he's moving.
Speaker 1: You can feel it.
Speaker 1: We're growing, we're moving good, everything we're doing is just everything's falling in line.
Speaker 1: Then Bill made some poor choices in life.
Speaker 1: My poor choices cost me my business.
Speaker 1: I went from owning my own business, traveling, doing what I love to do, which is therapy, to losing everything.
Speaker 1: This forced me to go back into the workforce.
Speaker 1: Only job I got was in South Dakota, at the VA.
Speaker 1: I went in and I told the pastor and the associate pastor and I was upfront and honest admitted my indiscretions, confessed what I did and told them that I needed to move to take care of my family.
Speaker 1: It was at this point that the associate pastor told me with what you just did, you can't hear from God.
Speaker 1: God doesn't speak to people that do things like that.
Speaker 1: So what did Bill hear?
Speaker 1: This was the second time I was told you're not good enough for God.
Speaker 1: Pack our stuff.
Speaker 1: We move to South Dakota.
Speaker 1: You know, we counted one day.
Speaker 1: I think we've moved more than we've ever lived in one area, if you add all the time up Until we moved to Texas.
Speaker 1: By the way.
Speaker 1: When we get to South Dakota we go straight to an Assembly of God church again.
Speaker 1: Thought I would have learned by now, but we didn't.
Speaker 1: And we were the youngest people in the church.
Speaker 1: There was no kids activity, no, nothing.
Speaker 1: So my children started attending a Westland church and one day Lori said hey, we need to go there and check this out.
Speaker 1: So we go and we check it out and you know, I'm a firm believer as an adult.
Speaker 1: I can get fed, but my kids need to be around people that are Christian.
Speaker 1: So he said, all right, we're going to go to this church, we go to the church and things are going.
Speaker 1: My kids are connected, we're getting connected.
Speaker 1: Believe it or not, you know what happens.
Speaker 1: God shows up again.
Speaker 1: Not you know what happens, god shows up again.
Speaker 1: Maybe I should say I just opened up again.
Speaker 1: I start serving, I start doing things.
Speaker 1: I even start speaking when the pastor's out First message I ever delivered are you ready Christmas Eve service?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 1: Pastor called me one day on Christmas Eve and he said hey, bill, I'm on my way to Rapid City.
Speaker 1: I said good, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: He goes.
Speaker 1: Joanna's in labor.
Speaker 1: I said cool, what do you need?
Speaker 1: He goes, you need to speak tonight.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, he goes.
Speaker 1: It's Christmas, it's easy Read the Christmas story.
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, we'll do this.
Speaker 1: So this growth continues and we moved to Texas.
Speaker 1: When we moved here, we attended another church.
Speaker 1: This was an experience unlike any service I've ever attended in my life.
Speaker 1: We felt like God was moving.
Speaker 1: Lori was connected.
Speaker 1: Lori was volunteering.
Speaker 1: Lori actually became employed there.
Speaker 1: I was still working at the VA, connecting with stuff.
Speaker 1: I retired from the VA.
Speaker 1: I volunteered to do outreach for this church.
Speaker 1: After about a year of doing the outreach for free, I was offered a position.
Speaker 1: Once again I thought, okay, this is what God told me to do, this was what he set me apart for.
Speaker 1: He set me apart for this is my calling.
Speaker 1: I took the position.
Speaker 1: I was over the outreach, marriage ministry, pastoral care and things like that.
Speaker 1: I did the hospital visitations, did counseling.
Speaker 1: Did you know?
Speaker 1: I'm a counselor by trade.
Speaker 1: So I'm sure this is it that first year.
Speaker 1: We're growing man.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm doing things that I never thought I would be able to do in my life and I thought I am good enough.
Speaker 1: I thought back at all those people who said I wasn't good enough and I was like you know what they were wrong.
Speaker 1: God's got a purpose for me.
Speaker 1: I'm doing God's work.
Speaker 1: During this time there was a good friend of mine that when I told him I said, hey, church offered me a position as a pastor, he laughed.
Speaker 1: And then, when he quit laughing, he said, hey, you've got to do me a promise.
Speaker 1: I said what's that?
Speaker 1: He said, bill, promise me the day that you go on Sunday, you wake up on Sunday and you go to work instead of church, you quit.
Speaker 1: I'm like what he goes.
Speaker 1: When you're going to work in God's house and not going to church, not worshiping God, you need to leave.
Speaker 1: I said here's the deal, I will do that.
Speaker 1: He's like all right.
Speaker 1: So, like I said the first year, everything's going great.
Speaker 1: We're in Second year.
Speaker 1: I start seeing little things.
Speaker 1: I notice things that I wasn't comfortable with.
Speaker 1: I start praying, I start pressing in and things don't change.
Speaker 1: I'm I don't want to say rebelling, I'm going against the system.
Speaker 1: I think that's a nice way to say it.
Speaker 1: I'm not conforming to the expectations that they had of me.
Speaker 1: As I'm praying, I remembered what this guy said and I remembered that I was now going to work, I wasn't going to church I didn't sit in a service.
Speaker 1: I was always doing security.
Speaker 1: I was always doing something.
Speaker 1: I was not experiencing God when I went.
Speaker 1: And how many know that?
Speaker 1: You can go home and listen to the same service you just missed and it's not the same, it's a whole different feeling.
Speaker 1: Then it happened, praying God says you're done.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes, I get to leave.
Speaker 1: He says but you can't quit, you have to be released by them.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you know you have to submit to authority, even when authority isn't fun.
Speaker 1: I'm like all right, let's do this.
Speaker 1: Then it happened I'm sitting in my office.
Speaker 1: I get a phone call and I hear hey, executive pastor, I want to meet with you after lunch.
Speaker 1: Are you good with that?
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, we can meet after lunch, not a problem.
Speaker 1: Go home for lunch.
Speaker 1: I tell Lori hey, executive pastor wants to meet with me after lunch.
Speaker 1: She goes what's it about?
Speaker 1: I said I don't know.
Speaker 1: My phone rings again.
Speaker 1: He said hey, by the way, the senior pastor is going to be there too.
Speaker 1: I said am I in trouble?
Speaker 1: He goes oh, no, we just need to talk.
Speaker 1: Go in and I sit down, he said.
Speaker 1: After some conversation.
Speaker 1: He said we have three questions for you.
Speaker 1: Can you tell us when you were called to be a pastor, when it was confirmed, when you were called to be a pastor at this church?
Speaker 1: How was it confirmed and are you fulfilling God's calling at this church?
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what I was don't want to use that word I was irritated, extremely irritated.
Speaker 1: There we go and I've learned that when I get upset I don't respond because that military mindset comes back in and my words are not very Christian or loving, unless I step back.
Speaker 1: So I step back and I respond by email.
Speaker 1: I answer all their questions.
Speaker 1: Two weeks later I'm called back in.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm told during this meeting Bill, through prayer, fasting and reflection, god has told me that you are not to be here for the next season.
Speaker 1: The executive pastor chimes.
Speaker 1: The senior pastor chimes in and says this was confirmed to me this morning when I pulled into the parking lot and noticed your pickup was not here.
Speaker 1: I was like I rode with Lori.
Speaker 1: That's confirmation.
Speaker 1: Do you know what?
Speaker 1: This was the third time.
Speaker 1: You know what happens after three strikes in baseball, I'm out.
Speaker 1: But I'm not out of that church, I'm out of church period.
Speaker 1: I decided right then I'm done with church, I don't need church.
Speaker 1: I'm still a Christian, but I'm going to do with whoever heard of this saying I'm going to be spiritual and not religious.
Speaker 1: Who ever heard of this saying I'm going to be spiritual and not religious.
Speaker 1: That means I get to go home and pray my way, read the Bible my way, worship my way, do everything my way, because it's a spiritual connection between me and God.
Speaker 1: I don't need no offense all y'all, because this is between me and the big guy.
Speaker 1: That's what I walked out with.
Speaker 1: Because this is between me and the big guy, that's what I walked out with.
Speaker 1: I thought no church, no pastor and no church people.
Speaker 1: I thought that hurt.
Speaker 1: But what happened after that was reconfirming to me.
Speaker 1: You see, when we left, none of my Christian friends at church reached out to me, none.
Speaker 1: That's when I learned real quick you either have friends at church or you have friends from church.
Speaker 1: We don't need friends at church Because friends at church are there on Sunday.
Speaker 1: We need friends from church because the same guy that made me promise that I quit when it became a job wasn't at that church anymore because he already left.
Speaker 1: But who reached out?
Speaker 1: He did, he was my friend from church.
Speaker 1: Not only did he do that, but he challenged me to do something else.
Speaker 1: After a couple weeks he told me.
Speaker 1: He said hey, bill, I know you're not going anywhere, but we found this little church out on 1844.
Speaker 1: I think you guys should come here.
Speaker 1: So what's it called?
Speaker 1: He goes Connect Church.
Speaker 1: I'm like what denomination he goes, I don't know.
Speaker 1: By the way, that was the right answer.
Speaker 1: Okay, so, and I'm just going to be honest and transparent here I went home, I listened to the message, I watched the service online.
Speaker 1: I thought I don't like the worship, I don't like the pastor.
Speaker 1: I mean, when you have a pastor who's speaking truth and not trying to become famous, that hurts, and who goes to church where they leave the lights on during worship, I'm like, all right, I'm going to go For my wife's sake, she wants to go.
Speaker 1: We're going to go.
Speaker 1: We walk in here.
Speaker 1: We haven't moved much.
Speaker 1: I think we sat in the back row.
Speaker 1: Okay, I already have a preconceived notion.
Speaker 1: I walk in here and, of course, the lights are on.
Speaker 1: There's no lights that are flashing, there's no smoke and the base does not vibrate the seats all the way through the house and then pastor gets up and delivers a message that has substance, has meaning, has truth, but it's delivered with love.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what.
Speaker 1: To top it all off, this gray-haired guy with the great big beard walks up here, pulls out a piece of paper I remember this and reads the announcements I'm going, that's not how church works.
Speaker 1: And then he says, of all things, welcome home.
Speaker 1: I thought to myself this is not my home.
Speaker 1: I walked out of here and I told Lori.
Speaker 1: I said, lori, I'm not going.
Speaker 1: As you can tell, once again I lost Because, to top it all off, the guy that invited me here he wasn't even here that week.
Speaker 1: I'm going, wait a minute.
Speaker 1: Well, lori said we should just come back.
Speaker 1: And the reason was is it reminded her of her home church.
Speaker 1: It reminded her of the raw movement of the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 1: Nothing fancy, nothing big, no big show, just truth and love.
Speaker 1: The next week I came back.
Speaker 1: I asked Pastor Steve and I said hey, pastor, you want to go out for lunch?
Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, we'll meet for lunch.
Speaker 1: So we met for lunch.
Speaker 1: I swear Lori was thinking oh, what did he just do?
Speaker 1: Bill's hurt, bill hates the church and Bill is blaming every pastor for what's going on.
Speaker 1: Because, you see, everyone who's told me that God can't use me has been a pastor.
Speaker 1: It's never been anyone else, and I always thought the pastors know everything.
Speaker 2: Mm-mm.
Speaker 1: So when we go to meet with Pastor Stephen, she was probably praying something to the effect of Dear Jesus, please don't let him embarrass me, Let him control his word and don't allow him to show his hurt or take his hurt out on him.
Speaker 1: What I did is I laid down the law, Told Pastor Stephen what happened to the last position.
Speaker 1: I had the last church and I said here's the deal.
Speaker 1: I'm here, I'm going to sit in that back row right there and I'm not going to do anything.
Speaker 1: Don't ask me to do anything for at least a year, because I don't need this.
Speaker 1: And this is what I realized when I realized that we are extremely blessed here.
Speaker 1: He respected this.
Speaker 1: I thought he let me sit.
Speaker 1: He only talked to me when I talked to him, never asked me to do anything, never approached me, reached out to see if I needed anything.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, about time someone listens to me.
Speaker 1: That wasn't it.
Speaker 1: He allowed me to heal.
Speaker 1: He couldn't heal me.
Speaker 1: Pastor couldn't heal me.
Speaker 1: What he said up here couldn't heal me.
Speaker 1: The worship couldn't heal me.
Speaker 1: I had to sit back there and experience what I've missed for so long, and that was the move of the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 1: I sat many days with just tears trying to figure out why.
Speaker 1: Needless to say, I'm here now and this is what I did learn I learned that Connect Church is my home.
Speaker 1: I learned that God doesn't need lights turned down, doesn't need the base turned up, doesn't need smoke machines, doesn't need any of that to be present.
Speaker 1: What he needs is true, raw worship To fall on your face without an agenda to submit fully, and that's what I love about this.
Speaker 1: You start in, you come here some days and you start worship and it's like all right, 10.30.
Speaker 1: It's still going, still going, still going.
Speaker 1: There's no agenda.
Speaker 1: What time's lunch Sometime?
Speaker 1: We have a mature spiritual leader who delivers messages with love.
Speaker 1: Conviction allows the Holy Spirit to show up when, where and however chooses.
Speaker 1: That is where healing comes from.
Speaker 1: Needless to say, now I can actually say what they say at the McDonald's commercial about Connect Church I'm loving it.
Speaker 1: Okay, I tell you this as a story of God's love and his mercy, His healing power, of what he can do when you submit, what he can do when you drop all your guards.
Speaker 1: I'm going to tell myself Friday I'm looking at Lori, I think it was Friday morning.
Speaker 1: Okay, Friday morning I woke up to call Stephen, Pastor, Stephen, to tell him to call Jim.
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding, I didn't sleep, I was sick.
Speaker 1: I've written this, I don't know how many.
Speaker 1: This isn't it.
Speaker 1: I even went back and pulled up the hard drives from when I lived in South Dakota to find I said I can just repeat one of these.
Speaker 1: They've never heard it.
Speaker 1: And then I sit down and it came back to this.
Speaker 1: I'm like I'm not good enough.
Speaker 1: Pastor comes up and he's dynamic.
Speaker 1: I don't think anyone will deny that.
Speaker 1: Jim comes up.
Speaker 1: Jim teaches a great lesson.
Speaker 1: I get a lot from you.
Speaker 1: I can't compare.
Speaker 1: What am I going to say?
Speaker 1: God?
Speaker 1: And Before I formed you in your mother's womb, before you were born, I set you apart.
Speaker 1: I appointed you a prophet among nations.
Speaker 1: You know what that means?
Speaker 1: That means that God had something laid out to me before my mom and dad even met.
Speaker 1: That means that he has a purpose in my life.
Speaker 1: He has a calling on my life.
Speaker 1: Is it to stand up here every week?
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm a mental health therapist.
Speaker 1: Okay, Don't worry.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm a mental health therapist.
Speaker 1: Okay, Don't worry.
Speaker 1: That is when I left, when I was asked to leave my position at the church.
Speaker 1: I went home and I asked my wife what do I do now?
Speaker 1: What do I do?
Speaker 1: I have nothing.
Speaker 1: Everything God I was supposed to do for God is gone.
Speaker 1: Everything I was supposed to do for God is gone.
Speaker 1: I have my military and I have my retirement.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 1: I have no purpose in life anymore.
Speaker 1: You know what she said.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what.
Speaker 1: I got real, real blessed when I married that woman.
Speaker 1: She said you're a counselor, you can make a bond with a rock.
Speaker 1: Go be a counselor.
Speaker 1: I'm like what she goes.
Speaker 1: God will provide.
Speaker 1: Go open a practice.
Speaker 1: And then I remembered the other part, For I know the plans I have for you.
Speaker 1: They are plans for good, not disaster, to give you a future and hope.
Speaker 1: I've made my living as a therapist for many years.
Speaker 1: I've done good when I put God first in my business.
Speaker 1: I've failed when I put God first in my business.
Speaker 1: I failed when I put myself first in my business.
Speaker 1: So I went and opened that door again and when I opened that door I'd been blessed.
Speaker 1: Not only does that provide an income for my family, not only does that provide some of the things that people need in their life.
Speaker 1: That provides an opportunity for me to share God with everyone that I see.
Speaker 1: When I worked at the VA, I couldn't.
Speaker 1: When I worked at the church this is tricky.
Speaker 1: I could, according to their guidelines, when I work in my office.
Speaker 1: Well, it's fair game.
Speaker 1: And if you ever come to my office number one, I'll refer you on.
Speaker 1: And if you ever come to my office number one, I'll refer you on, Not for any other reason except for it's a boundary thing.
Speaker 1: And you see me and I pause.
Speaker 1: I don't pause for lack of words.
Speaker 1: I pause because I'm asking the Spirit to guide me with the words that come next.
Speaker 1: And I tell my clients when they come in that I'm fortunate with this.
Speaker 1: I tell them if I don't offend you, I'm not doing my job.
Speaker 1: So if I offend you and you walk out, I'm good, Okay.
Speaker 1: But I've also received some of the best responses there is from people.
Speaker 1: I've seen their growth.
Speaker 1: I've seen things like that.
Speaker 1: So what's your calling?
Speaker 1: Everyone has the same calling in life, believe it or not.
Speaker 1: It's to share God.
Speaker 1: That's all it is.
Speaker 1: It's where you share God.
Speaker 1: Some people share God from up here.
Speaker 1: Some people share God in an office, wherever it's going to be now, because we're moving.
Speaker 1: Okay, Some people share God driving down an oil field pipeline, Some people share it on a lawnmower.
Speaker 1: Where do you share God at?
Speaker 1: What is your calling?
Speaker 1: As we get ready to go into the new year, this is what hit me.
Speaker 1: What do we do now?
Speaker 1: Everyone sits down and thinks, oh, it's a new year, it's a new opportunity, new chances in life.
Speaker 1: You guys think of that.
Speaker 1: I get to start everything over on the 1st of January.
Speaker 1: I wish that was pretty good, because then all my debt would go away, everything like that would go away.
Speaker 1: But it don't work that way.
Speaker 1: We sit down, we make our New Year's resolutions.
Speaker 1: By the way, they usually go away the second week of January, I think.
Speaker 1: There's a national day called Stop Day or Quit Day.
Speaker 1: Some of us actually get a word.
Speaker 1: How many people say, oh, I've got to get a word for the new year, or maybe a Bible verse.
Speaker 1: I'm going to live this Bible verse for the next year.
Speaker 1: This is a new time for me to start, a new time for me to grow.
Speaker 1: It's a new time for I'm just going to change everything about last year, because last year was rotten.
Speaker 1: How about this for a word Finish.
Speaker 1: As I'm sitting here and I'm praying over this and I'm going through this, that's what keeps on coming back to my mind.
Speaker 1: Bill, you're appointed by me to do great things.
Speaker 1: Why don't you finish?
Speaker 1: So I sit down and I think, finish, what Does it mean?
Speaker 1: Finish my house, Finish that diet I never started really.
Speaker 1: Finish that gym membership that I've paid for all year and don't go.
Speaker 1: How about finish what God told me to do at the beginning of the year?
Speaker 1: How about finish what God told me to do two years ago?
Speaker 1: Finish what he told me to do at the beginning of the year.
Speaker 1: How about finish what God told me to do two years ago?
Speaker 1: Finish what he told me to do five years ago.
Speaker 1: What about what he told you to do the first time you met God?
Speaker 1: Have you finished that?
Speaker 1: Have you looked at it?
Speaker 1: I sat down and I thought, man, that's a long list that is a huge list.
Speaker 1: Pastor Stephen talks about five, five and five.
Speaker 1: I'll be honest, there's days that five, five and five don't exist in my life, because I don't think I have five, five and five.
Speaker 1: God said why don't you finish that?
Speaker 1: I'll tell you the truth, god, I'd have to start it every day to finish it.
Speaker 1: Why don't you finish that commitment you made to your wife, bill, that you'd be the spiritual leader in your home?
Speaker 1: Why don't you finish some of that?
Speaker 1: Why don't you finish what you started?
Speaker 1: When I gave you the words to share with people, I said whoa, God?
Speaker 1: I told you I'm going to call Jim, because if I come up here and I speak, you know what that means.
Speaker 1: That means I open myself up, I'm vulnerable to everyone and I look out here and I look at people with vast knowledge, years of knowledge in living for Christ, and I think I'm not good enough.
Speaker 1: God says you need to finish it.
Speaker 1: You need to be prepared to brush off the judgments and the hurt that people that hear and see this are going to reflect and see this are going to reflect.
Speaker 1: I'm sure.
Speaker 1: I'm sure as anything that there's somebody that attended where I used to be employed that is going to see this.
Speaker 1: I'm sure there's going to be talk about it and I'm sure that they're going to critique it, and then someone might even reach out and give me some advice.
Speaker 1: But you know what I'm doing what God said, I'm finishing what he started.
Speaker 1: I'm a firm believer that God will never give you anything more until what you finished, what he gave you last.
Speaker 1: So who all wants more from God?
Speaker 1: Who all wants the blessings?
Speaker 1: Who all wants the Wait?
Speaker 1: If I get the blessings and I do more for God, that means I get the blessings and I do more for God, that means I get the trials.
Speaker 1: Oh man, if I do more for God, that means I've got to put myself out there more.
Speaker 1: That means I have to be a Christian more than just Sunday.
Speaker 1: Okay, I have to be a Christian more than just Sunday.
Speaker 1: Okay, if I want to hear from God more, that means I have to read.
Speaker 1: More means I have to pray.
Speaker 1: More means I have to worship.
Speaker 1: More means I have to shut the Cowboys football game off.
Speaker 1: It means I need to step back from my life and focus on his life.
Speaker 1: Guys.
Speaker 1: I'm not speaking to you, trust me.
Speaker 1: I'm speaking to me Because we all want the benefits, we all want the gains, but not a lot of us want to put in the time or the effort or the cost.
Speaker 1: You know, when I read this and I looked at it, it said God had plans for Jeremiah's life and he had specific plans.
Speaker 1: This was a commentary for our life.
Speaker 1: His goal is for us to live according to his plans, allowing him to fulfill the purpose in our life through him.
Speaker 1: Through him.
Speaker 1: But with this, we have to remember is God's plans involve difficulty, trials, and makes us subject to ridicule and even doubt from other people ridicule and even doubt from other people.
Speaker 1: But no matter what, he always works for our good and sometimes our good offends those around us.
Speaker 1: When I was doing this, like I said, this was every time I sat down to write this.
Speaker 1: It always came back to this and, honestly, guys, this is not what I wanted to talk about.
Speaker 1: I wanted to talk about purpose and passion.
Speaker 1: Okay, I did, but it's not.
Speaker 1: But a song came on I don't know if you guys ever heard of Torn Wells and the song is Not Done With you.
Speaker 1: That came on and I had to look it up and listen to it again and again and again, because God is not done with us.
Speaker 1: Song goes God's not done with you.
Speaker 1: I'd sing, but everyone would leave, even with your broken heart, your wounds and your scars.
Speaker 1: God's not done with you, your wounds and your scars.
Speaker 1: God's not done with you.
Speaker 1: Even when you're lost and it's hard and you're falling apart, god's not done with you.
Speaker 1: He's got a plan.
Speaker 1: This is all part of it.
Speaker 1: He's going to finish what he started.
Speaker 1: He's got a plan.
Speaker 1: This is part of it.
Speaker 1: He's going to finish what he started.
Speaker 1: He's not done.
Speaker 1: God's not done writing your story.
Speaker 1: But in order for him to write our story, we have to be an active participant.
Speaker 1: So I have a couple questions for you guys.
Speaker 1: Are you good enough for God?
Speaker 1: Are you good enough for what he calls you to do?
Speaker 1: Are you good enough to listen to what he tells you to do?
Speaker 1: Are you going to let society and people dictate who you are?
Speaker 1: I fall and fail every day.
Speaker 1: I tell my people in counseling, when I do marriage counseling.
Speaker 1: My goal in life and my marriage is to elevate my wife to the highest that she can be next to God.
Speaker 1: My goal in my marriage is to.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have shared these because she's going to hear them now.
Speaker 1: My goal in my marriage is to do what that verse says, is to do what that verse says love my wife like Christ.
Speaker 1: Loves the church.
Speaker 1: Which means doesn't mean die.
Speaker 1: Everyone says, oh, I'll die for her.
Speaker 1: No, it means sacrifice everything.
Speaker 1: And you know how long I'm good at that.
Speaker 1: I achieve that every day, until I get out of bed.
Speaker 1: I achieve everything God tells me to do, without fail, without fall, without anything, until I get out of bed.
Speaker 1: And then it even gets worse when I get in my truck.
Speaker 1: It really gets worse when I get on my bike.
Speaker 1: Okay, but if we're going to do what God wants us to do, we've got to open up.
Speaker 1: So, as I get ready to close here, do you believe that God's not done with your story?
Speaker 1: Do you believe that what you're doing is good enough for him?
Speaker 1: Do you believe you have the capability to be good enough for him?
Speaker 1: Do you believe that God's not done with your story?
Speaker 1: I used to think that God's not here, waiting for me.
Speaker 1: God's not here.
Speaker 1: Where's God?
Speaker 1: Then I realized that God's always here.
Speaker 1: It's up to me to take that step.
Speaker 1: He'll convict you.
Speaker 1: He'll change you, but you've got to take the step.
Speaker 1: So don't do like me and wait for God to show up, because he's here waiting for you.
Speaker 1: Maybe that first step is that personal relationship.
Speaker 1: Maybe that first step is saying you know what, god, I don't got this.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's God, I need to feel your love, that first step.
Speaker 1: Somebody once said that the longest walk in the world is from that pew to that altar.
Speaker 1: Not only is it long, but sometimes it's lonely until you get here.
Speaker 1: Maybe what you need to do is you need to sit down and say, okay, I need to renew this relationship before I go anywhere else.
Speaker 1: I tried, I tried, I tried, I failed, I did it my way, I was spiritual.
Speaker 1: Okay, maybe you need to renew that relationship with God.
Speaker 1: If this is you, you can start that new year again.
Speaker 1: You can start that new year right now.
Speaker 1: That's a new year, that new you.
Speaker 1: Maybe what you need to do, maybe you need to sit down and I'm going to encourage everyone to do this sit down and reflect.
Speaker 1: What does God tell me to do that I haven't done?
Speaker 1: What does God ask me to sacrifice that I haven't sacrificed?
Speaker 1: Maybe what you need to do is list that out, give it to God.
Speaker 1: And if you're like me, trust me, I'm going to fail.
Speaker 1: But when I fail, I'm going to get back up.
Speaker 1: I'm going to walk right back over.
Speaker 1: I'm going to say you know what, god, I messed it up again, but thankfully, because of your grace and love, I get to try again.
Speaker 1: I get to try again.
Speaker 1: It's when we quit trying, when we blatantly do it again and again and again, when we get ready to do something and the Holy Spirit convicts us before we do it.
Speaker 1: We need to listen.
Speaker 1: Maybe we need to look at that.
Speaker 1: We need to look at our unfinished assignments.
Speaker 1: We need to go back and start those so we can finish them, so God can give us more.
Speaker 1: Maybe what we need to do is we need to actually believe that God can do more.
Speaker 1: A lot of times I forget about what God has done in our lives.
Speaker 1: I forget about the fact that he was there in those days in the military that were bad, otherwise I wouldn't be standing here.
Speaker 1: We forget about the fact that God has blessed us over and over and over and over and over.
Speaker 1: I don't care if it's financial, I don't care if it's physical, I don't care what it is, god has healed us.
Speaker 1: You know, when I got out of the military this isn't in there, it just hit me when I got out of the military, I refused to marry my wife Because, I was told, after being flown to all these different doctors, they had no idea what was wrong with me.
Speaker 1: After being flown to all these different doctors, they had no idea what was wrong with me.
Speaker 1: I was told that I would not live long enough to see my oldest son graduate high school.
Speaker 1: My lung capacity was so bad that I couldn't do anything.
Speaker 1: I wasn't going to put her through that.
Speaker 1: I was so sick.
Speaker 1: I had a backup.
Speaker 1: I mean mentally sick.
Speaker 1: I had a backup plan for her to marry some other guy in case I died so he could take care of her.
Speaker 1: Okay, let me tell you something.
Speaker 1: My oldest son, 32, graduated with four kids.
Speaker 1: My second child, 31, had to look, graduated two kids.
Speaker 1: I have five children that graduated high school.
Speaker 1: I have eight grandchildren and I wasn't supposed to live to see the first one graduate.
Speaker 1: Five children that graduated high school.
Speaker 1: I have eight grandchildren and I wasn't supposed to live to see the first one graduate.
Speaker 1: So maybe it's time we believe that God will do what no one else thinks he will.
Speaker 1: I'm going to encourage you guys if you need any of this, come up here.
Speaker 1: Come up to the altar and ask.
Speaker 1: We have a God that loves to give, but we have an attitude sometimes that forgets to ask.
Speaker 1: So, before I close, I'm going to give you all an opportunity.
Speaker 1: If you need prayer, come up here.
Speaker 1: If you want to experience God, come up here.
Speaker 1: If you need to, if you need prayer, come up here.
Speaker 1: If you want to experience God, come up here.
Speaker 1: If you need to rededicate your life, come up here.
Speaker 1: You know there's no judgment here.
Speaker 1: I think Brother Vernon said earlier this is nothing but love in this room.
Speaker 1: When you walk through those doors, you're accepted, you're loved.
Speaker 1: Don't let that escape from you.
Speaker 2: Amen.
Speaker 2: I'm in between your loving arms.
Speaker 2: Worship is my heart's response.
Speaker 2: You're all I want.
Speaker 2: You're all I want, close enough to see your face.
Speaker 2: I'm caught in your eyes, your gaze.
Speaker 2: I can hear the sound of heaven.
Speaker 2: You call my name.
Speaker 2: So I draw close again and give you all I am to bring you praise and give you all I am Close enough to hear you speak and out with me in fields of grace.
Speaker 2: Your presence, lord, is all I seek.
Speaker 2: You're all I want.
Speaker 2: So I draw close again, I give you all I am To bring me praise again.
Speaker 2: I can feel it deep within my soul, I can see it.
Speaker 2: The glory all around, glory all around Faith is rising.
Speaker 2: Our heart will give you praise.
Speaker 2: The presence is my own.
Speaker 2: I can feel it Deep within my soul.
Speaker 2: I can't feel it deep within my soul, I can't see it.
Speaker 2: But glory all around Faith is rising.
Speaker 2: My heart will give praise.
Speaker 2: The Lord's presence is my hope.
Speaker 2: So I draw close again, give you all I am To bring you praise, to bless your holy name, cause there is no wonder in the love of your embrace.
Speaker 2: I can feel it deep within my soul, I can't see it, your glory all around.
Speaker 2: My faith is rising.
Speaker 2: My heart will give you praise, lord.
Speaker 2: Your presence is my hope.
Speaker 2: I can't feel it deep within my soul, I can't see it.
Speaker 2: Your glory all around.
Speaker 2: Your faith is rising.
Speaker 2: My heart will give you praise, lord.
Speaker 2: Your presence is mine and I draw close again and give you all I am To bring you praise.
Speaker 2: So bless the Holy Name, lord, I am to be praised, to bless the holy man, because there is awe and wonder in the love of your embrace.
Speaker 2: Hey, I'm Stephen and I'm Jessie and we're the lead pastors here at Connect Church.
Speaker 2: We wanted to say this morning from us to you thank you for joining our live stream.
Speaker 2: If you'd like to know more about us, visit connectchurchlife.
Speaker 2: There you can find different things like events.
Speaker 2: We're having our core beliefs, our core values and different ways to give.
Speaker 2: We hope you have an amazing week and that you'll join us next Sunday at 10 30 am.