You’re Not Allowed To Enjoy The Sun | Trending Ep344

 The UK experiences the hottest May day on record as temperatures pass 34C. Netanyahu says Israel will intensify strikes against Hezbollah. And Kent is facing a toddler crime wave as 683 people aged nine or below were named by police for offences such as burglary, arson and sexual offending - the youngest suspect was identified as a one-year-old, who was reported to the force after another child suffered a minor injury.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to today's episode of Trending. It's been a wonderful weekend in the UK. The sun's been shining. People have been smiling. Can only mean one thing. Climate change. Let's start with Sky News. We're the latest, hottest ever May Day recorded as temperature hits 34.8 degrees. Just sounds terrifying, doesn't it? The record for the hottest day in May has been broken with a new high at Heathrow. On a record-breaking day, we're also in the middle of the warmest bank holiday ever. Yes. That includes August. I know you were thinking that, so they've clarified. Heathrow, right. So one of the biggest airports on the planet. Almost five square miles of solid asphalt. Good place to put a weather station then. Okay, let's have a look at what asphalt does when the sun shines upon it. When asphalt gets hot, the dark surface absorbs solar radiation, causing the ground temperature to soar significantly higher than the actual air temperature. It's a good place to uh put a weather station then, innit? Nice way of cooking the books. 32.8 degrees have previously been measured on three separate occasions in May, right? So we have had hot maze before then. I started to panic from the headline that, you know, it was supposed to be Baltic in May and suddenly it's hot. In 1922, in 1922 again, so two um two different occasions in 1922 and in 1944. But temperatures will continue to rise and are likely to surpass the previous record according to the services forecasts. Forecasts. Got a lot of forecasts. Will that be one of the computer-engineered ones? The ones that like Neil Ferguson used to like. We like computer models. But I do find it strange that the forecast suggests that it's going to get even hotter. Because what that would mean is that would mean that the climate scaremongers might forecast something that fits their scaremongering, well gone die narrative. And I can't imagine them doing that. That just seems crazy. Okay, let's go to the Daily Mail. What the Daily Mail is saying. Well, it was it was 34 a minute ago, it's 30 degrees now, before rising to 33 degree blowtorch heat over bank holiday weekend as week-long heat wave continues. Blowtorch. A 33 degrees Celsius blowtorch. Right, let's have a look at a blowtorch. A blowtorch runs at between 1,000 and 3,000 degrees Celsius. This is a 33 degree blowtorch. Okay, mate. Amber and yellow weather alerts, that's terrifying, have been issued ahead of the bank holiday period as the heat wave across the UK continues following the hottest day of the year so far on Saturday. Well, that's sort of what happens, isn't it? See, they frame this in a certain way. It's it's only it's only going to get hotter. We've had the hottest day of the year so far, but it's gonna get, well, yeah, because we're going into the summer. And I used to know that summer was coming when the birds started nesting at the bottom of the garden. Now I know it's coming because the Daily Mail's got the 33-degree blowtorch out. Parts of the country are expected to reach up to 30 degrees on Sunday. It was 33 a minute ago, and then it was 34 as well, with temperature expected to rise as high as 33 on Monday and Tuesday, hotter than the Seychelles. It's great, in it. I went to a splash pad with the kids. It was awesome. Everyone was loving it. Smiling, running around, having a great time with the families. Can't have that though, can we? However, parts of Western Scotland and Northern Ireland will experience cooler temperatures with clouds and spells of rain expected. Poor Scotland. You got a feel for them, ain't ya? Not driving enough. That's what it is. Leave the heating on, drive more, eat more meat, get more haggis on the go Scotland, and you can have a hot day like us. Right, what's the BBC saying? Hottest May Day on record as temperatures pass 34 degrees. We've had 34, we've had 34.8, we've had 30, we've had 33, we've had 32. All on the same day. Um, let's continue. The UK has recorded its all-time highest May temperature as part of London, reached 34.8 on Monday. Yeah, well, since records began, you know, 25 minutes ago, the provisional figure recorded at Kew Gardens, I thought it was recorded at Heathrow. Okay. Another built-up area though. Hell also surpassed the hottest bank holiday Monday on record, 33.3. They love the 33s, don't they? On the August one, that was in August, remember you expect it in August, don't expect it in May. Are you okay? Is everyone okay? Should mark yourself safe on Facebook, shouldn't you? They should give you the option to do that. Mark yourself safe from the May bank holiday blowtorch. Um Wales, oh, what's happening with Wales? Oh no, Wales has got it hot. That's all right. Well done, Wales. You've been driving and eating enough meat. Wales have also experienced its hottest May Day, reaching 32.2 at Hawarden Airport in Flintshire. It's an airport again. So asphalt, which as we've already discussed, makes it seem hotter than it actually is. Great place for those readings. Love it. Why would they decide, other than to cook the books, quite literally, to always stick them on an airport? This heat would be exceptional in the UK, even in midsummer, let alone in May, the Met Office said. Yeah, well, hopefully we'll have a nice summer as well. I'm sure you'll try and ruin it, but hopefully we will. The mercury is expected to rise further in the south and southeast of England, with forecasters warning of a possible 35 degrees on Monday and Tuesday. That's a serious blowtorch. That's an industrial blowtorch, that one at 35. What I love about this though is they they always have to find different ways to say the same things. So if they're talking about temperatures increasing, and then they want to say temperatures increasing again, they can't say temperatures increasing again. I've already said it. Do you know what I mean? When a journalist's writing it, right, and the temperatures have increased to 34 and they're expected to increase to 30, I can't say increase again. I've said it twice. The mercury is expected to rise. As in a thermometer, clever. See, that's why you work, that's why you work for the BBC, mate. Amazing. It is another example though, ladies and gentlemen, and we've spoken about this many times before, about the fact that people aren't allowed to enjoy anything. Like nothing. When summer comes in the UK, or even when spring comes, temperatures start to rise, people are out more, people are happier. They're out with their kids, the kids are running around, shorts and t-shirt, going to splash pads, like I say, at you know, at play parks and whatever. And everyone just feels better, everyone is kinder generally. You get the odd prat at a play park that does a crate of beer and acts like a knobhead, but that's just Britain, unfortunately. And in fact, it's the world. Overwhelmingly, when the sun is shining, people are happier. But they want us to fear it. They want us to fear the sun, which gives us life. They want us to fear carbon dioxide, which is literally the gas of life. Don't get sun on your skin. Don't get that vitamin D. No, none of that, mate. You've got to be frightened of that. Whilst at the same time, we're gonna build data centers everywhere on fertile farmland. That's if we haven't already put solar panels all over them to uh, you know, to get energy from the sun that we're supposed to be frightened of, the sun we're talking about blocking out despite spending all the money on solar panels. It it makes sense if you're if you're an idiot. But yeah, we can do that, don't worry about that. Data centers everywhere. We will use millions of gallons of fresh drinking water every day to cool these data centers. Why can't you use dirty water recycled? No, it's got to be fresh water. It's got to be the water that you need to drink. We'll use that, okay. Not to mention all the bombs that are being dropped left, right, and centre, all over the planet, back in Iran now, dropping bombs. But no, we're the problem and we can't enjoy the sunshine. We need a shopping bag for life. Don't you dare leave your TV on standby and make sure you pay a few quid to drive into the cities. Because that'll save climate change. If you went to London and you were allowed to drive into London for free, the world would end. But if you pay Sadiq Khan a few quid, everything's gonna be fine. It's ridiculous, isn't it? We should be celebrating it. We should be celebrating the fact that the sun's shining. Everyone's happy, it's great. Those solar panels that you're talking about, everyone, they're they're working now, aren't they? Isn't that good? Isn't that a good thing for our energy infrastructure given the fact that you've blown up all these coal-fired power stations? Isn't it a good thing that the sun's shining and providing energy to the United Kingdom at a time of energy turmoil, particularly with the Strait of Hormouths? Why are they not celebrating it? Do you know what? If it carries on like this, we might be able to produce fine wines again in Yorkshire, like we used to, in medieval times. Used to export fine wines across Europe, across the continent. Fine red wines were exported to French monasteries, not from French monasteries, but to French monasteries from the United Kingdom, from the north of England, because the sun was shining so much and it was such a beautiful climate in medieval times. I don't know what the excuse is for that. I don't know how many private jets there were in medieval times. I don't know how many Land Rover discoveries there were, or how many people were just, you know, leaving the hot tub on overnight. I don't know how much that was happening in medieval times, but whatever they were doing, it worked. But can't enjoy the sun. I had a great weekend and I refused to be made to feel like I'm going day.

SPEAKER_01 10:32

Don't mention the reptiles, Dave. Even less is said about the Grey Pope, which some believe to be the true ruling power in the Vatican. Humans emitten a masters. All of them had political sickness. I've never seen it before. This is the ultimate suicide cult. What if the symbols around us every day aren't just ornamental? We lost a thousand years of history. What if they're instructions?

SPEAKER_00 10:59

That state of awareness is not manipulatable.