28. Are You Saving It or Avoiding It? How to Spot Hidden Clutter Traps

Some clutter hides in plain sight—disguised as good intentions, future plans, or memories we think we’re preserving. In this episode of The Downsizing Roadmap Podcast, we unpack the hidden clutter traps that sneak into your home and your mindset.

Whether it’s the “someday” box, the craft supplies you’ll get to one day, or the heirlooms you’re saving for kids who don’t want them, this conversation helps you spot what you're truly avoiding.

We dive into:

• The psychology behind “just-in-case” clutter
• How to tell emotional value from practical use
• Questions to ask when you’re stuck on what to keep
• How to handle items you’ve been “saving” for years
• What to do with the version of yourself you thought you'd be

You’ll walk away with new awareness—and a few tough questions—to help you make space for the life you're actually living today.

🎧 Listen now and start reclaiming your space.

Mentioned in This Episode:

• UCLA study on stress and household objects
• The Minimalists on “just-in-case” clutter
• Our FREE 10-Day Downsizing Kickstart Plan (Email info@downsizingroadmap.com for your free copy)

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Let’s simplify, declutter, and create space for your next chapter—together!

Transcript

Jodi Rosko 0:01

Welcome back to another episode of the Downsizing Roadmap Podcast with your hosts Jodi Roscoe and Heather Fisher. We're talking about all things downsizing, from our own experiences with clients to guest experts. Let's make downsizing easier, one conversation at a time. Hi, welcome to Downsizing Roadmap. This is Jodi Roscoe. I'm Heather Fisher. And today we are talking about are you saving it or are you avoiding it? How to spot some hidden clutter traps, right?

Heather Fisher 0:32

So Yes, I'm sure we all have these in our house. So we're gonna talk about where you might find them and what to do about it.

Jodi Rosko 0:41

Yeah. So what's the difference? Like what is that? Like if you if you're saving it, is that really just a kind of a delayed decision, or are you actually saving it for something specific? Because I think a lot of times people talk themselves into thinking, hey, I'm saving this for something, so it's has purpose, right? It has a reason to be in my house, closet, attic, garage. We're fooling ourselves, clearly. Right most of the time. Yeah. So we have some um great story around why we're keeping it. And so I guess today what we're talking about is maybe challenging that story a little bit.

Heather Fisher 1:20

Like Yeah, putting the story to the test, ourselves. Yeah. Is that really the story? Yes. Or are we just kicking the can down the road and delaying making good choices around it?

Jodi Rosko 1:33

Yeah. So um so I think we when we have our downsizing class, we have we watch Jerry Seinfeld's little um skit on um Trashification. It's hilarious. You guys have to look it up. It's so funny. Um but he talks about how we put all of our mistakes like in the closets and then eventually in the garage. Yeah, the cupboards and the drawers. So when you're, you know, looking at all these hidden places that you've put things, um, they're really not being often used, and that's why they're in those places, especially in the backs of those places, right? In the backs of the cupboards, in the tops of your kitchen cabinets, you know, in the boxes in the back of the attic or garage or storage area.

Heather Fisher 2:20

Yeah, I think it's um a feeling that even people with um, you know, a house that you walk into and doesn't feel cluttered because the surfaces are clean, that we all have these hidden clutter traps, um, but they don't necessarily feel like clutter because they're either tucked away and forgotten about, or they were put there with a very good intention, or at least we convinced ourselves it was a good intention for keeping it. And so it wasn't just shoved for no reason. We we had a reason in our mind that we are, you know, convinced about, and we're just gonna challenge that a little bit um so that we can clear up those spaces and make less of a burden.

Jodi Rosko 3:06

Yeah, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it. Right. Right. Yeah. So um, so when you kind of are opening closets or whatever, defining that hidden clutter, you know, that's stuff that in your head you open it and you look at it and you think, oh, that's gonna be for the garage sale I'm gonna have. Or that's gonna be for um my kids when they get older, we're gonna save that for my kids. Or that's that craft that hobby or whatever that I was gonna do that I never did, and I bought all the stuff for it three years ago, and never have really gotten into that.

Heather Fisher 3:41

Yeah. I think when I think about this, I feel I mean we have a linen closet that has the um, you know, medications and all of those type of things, the stockpile of the extra toothpaste and all of that. And we've got bathroom vanity drawers and vanity cabinet, you know, all of the things. And I think about my daily routine and I've saved the rest of it, all the things for, you know, reasons. Maybe I'll need that or this or that, but we really use, you know, one shelf of things routinely. We're grabbing band-aids or, you know, the ibuprofen from one shelf and the rest.

Jodi Rosko 4:25

Or the stuff in the front.

Heather Fisher 4:26

Yes.

Jodi Rosko 4:26

Right? The shelf. It might be deep, right? And it's all just the stuff in the front that you're continuing to use. So you bought a new lotion for your face because the other one wasn't quite it, but you didn't throw it away. You just got the new one. It gets shoved back.

Heather Fisher 4:40

Yeah. But it doesn't feel necessarily like clutter because it all fits, it's not overflowing, and it all is the right category. This is the medicine cabinet or the linen cabin, you know, closet. It's all sorted, but back to that 80-20 rule, I probably in the last year have touched and used 20% of it. Right. And the rest of the yeah.

Jodi Rosko 5:08

And and you know, you you you just kind of push it back and you don't you just kind of like, oh, I'll get that new thing. Same thing that we talk all about all the time, no matter what it is. When you get the new thing, something else needs to go out, and we a lot of times we just don't. But I think that what happens is that the bigger our houses are, the more storage we have. In and so the house can look really put together put together on the outside, but because we have so much storage, we put stuff in there, and then it feels weird to have it be empty, right? It almost feels like we should fill up the spaces, which correct we don't need to do that, but it it feels like that. And so it doesn't feel c too much cluttery because like, oh, that cabinet's just full, even though you're just using the front of things.

Heather Fisher 5:58

Yeah. So other places where you can think of these clutter traps?

Jodi Rosko 6:04

Yeah, so I just cleaned out um not too long ago, like the um kid craft stuff, right? So when you have kids, you have all of the crayons and you know safety scissors and yes, like and scraps of paper and little, you know, pom-poms and things that you would make kid crafts with, right? Like I just had all kinds of stuff and stuff that was um probably stuff that also would go in making scrapbooks and stuff, which I thought I would do, but I never did. And so abandoned hobbies. Abandoned hobbies that kind of went with the kid, the kid stuff. Yeah, yeah. Um all kinds of stuff, like pipe cleaners and I don't know. So I just put like a whole box of it together and I I put it out on that free Facebook page, and you know, some mom with littles came and got it, and I'm sure she was super excited about it. Yeah. Because when you have little kids, like that's fun stuff to do.

Heather Fisher 7:05

Yeah, that's a couple days worth of keeping them busy over the summer. That's awesome.

Jodi Rosko 7:09

Yeah, I had all the play-doh like stamps and like just all kinds of stuff that I was like, why am I keeping this? My kids are never gonna do that again. So um, yeah. So sometimes it's kid stuff or your own craft stuff. So scrapbooking was in there as like my own craft stuff that I'm just have to believe realize I'm not doing that.

Heather Fisher 7:30

Yeah, so I think if you've been listening to our podcast and you know, we meet so many people that just feel overwhelmed by their stuff, this category, this this episode today is more about you know, w the place that we all are where you might not be feeling completely overwhelmed by it, but it's also not things you need to keep. Well, and it is still weighing on you a little bit.

Jodi Rosko 7:58

Like it does still weigh on you. Like, what was that statistic we had about how uh it really emotionally weighs on you? I I don't have the statistic here, but it is a it it it's a physical feeling that happens. It's like it's proven physical feeling that happens. That's your stuff is is actually weighing on you and causing you some level of anxiety. And so um having less in the cabinets and ha it's actually a mindset shift, honestly. Absolutely it's a mindset shift that you don't have to fill up all those spaces and feel like everything has to be full of stuff. It actually feels better if it isn't.

Heather Fisher 8:36

And then that l leaves that path open that if you're at a phase in life where you're considering, you know, am I ready for something more manageable space-wise, or you know, the support that I would get somewhere that's a community that has additional resources when you've gone through this process and you've lived with empty space in, you know, the place where you are and and realized that peace from it and that you didn't need the things, it makes that next step feel so much more doable because you're ready and you realize you don't need, you know, extra closets and three spare bedrooms because you have pared them down and emptied those shelves and those closets with the stuff you're not touching and using.

Jodi Rosko 9:30

Right, because I think that's a huge point of anxiety for people when they are thinking about downsizing is the question of how am I gonna fit all this stuff in a smaller place? Like, and the answer is you aren't. But that's okay because you don't actually need it. Like you you're fooling yourself if you think that you are using, you know, wearing every piece of clothing in your closet. I mean, some but some people may be, but I will say most of us are absolutely not wearing all the pieces of clothing in our closet or using all of the stuff that's in our bathroom or our kitchen, um, you know, let alone storage areas that we've kind of let things go to die or whatever, you know. Even the places that we are using constantly, we are not using all the stuff in all of our cabinets and we're not wearing every coat we have and all of those things.

Heather Fisher 10:19

Yeah. It I mean, I wish we could easily write down through a a day, a week, a month, like what cabinets are we actually getting anything out of, or you know, which we you know, maybe put painter's tape on all the closet doors and cabinet doors. And did you even open it? Have you opened this in the last six months? And and you know, maybe that could be a challenge that we you know do for ourselves to see where are we really using these things? Um because I we're just not. We're not we're not. And I feel like when we own it, but we're not using it, we do have that weight. It's like a running inventory list in our head of what do I need to manage, deal with, think about, what do I have, you know, what do I need to get at the store because we're we're not managing it well.

Jodi Rosko 11:15

Yeah, and and and as you're talking about your bathroom, I'm visualizing like the area where my stuff is. And it's all, you know, you you go in my bathroom, it doesn't look, you know, but you open the cabinet and there's definitely, definitely stuff in there that I'm not using.

Heather Fisher 11:32

Yeah. I mean, and like you're starting to say, mine does not look disorganized. My surfaces are clear. Yeah. It's in cabinets and drawers and sorted and drawer organizers, but I'm touching one little section of the drawer and one of, you know, the stand-up bottles of products I'm using and not using the rest. And I think that that um, you know, I'm not alone in that, that that's probably most of us and how freeing to well and some of that stuff I moved over from the house like four or five years ago, whatever it was, and like still haven't touched it.

Jodi Rosko 12:08

Like put it in the little contain, you know, like the little drawer organizer, and yeah. So yeah, there's a lot of hidden clutter, just hidden clutter.

Heather Fisher 12:18

Yeah, yeah. We have this quote here from Peter Walsh, um, who does a lot of um decluttering things, and his quote, uh, clutter is not just the stuff on your floor, it's anything that stands between you and the life that you want to be living. So back to what we talk about frequently, you know, what are you envisioning for your next, you know, five years, 10 years? What does that look like? And how is your stuff in these hidden clutter traps? How by avoiding that stuff, how are you avoiding that great life that's waiting for you?

Jodi Rosko 12:56

Right. Because in your head, you're like, how's that gonna work? How am I gonna deal with it for we'll just deal with that tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, right? And so it is stopping you from what living that life. You just aren't thinking about it in that way, but it is.

Heather Fisher 13:12

Absolutely, absolutely. And we've seen that with people, and they just you know are overwhelmed by the stuff stuff that's very meaningless, honestly, to them too.

Jodi Rosko 13:25

Right, right. So because we're not saying get rid of the important stuff. We're not we're not ever saying that. Like and but it can't all be important. There's so much stuff in everybody's houses. So much stuff. That's such a stopping point for people. So common justifications that we hear are things like, um, I'm saving this for my kids. Uh we just did an episode on that, so go listen to that one if that's one of the things that you're doing.

Heather Fisher 13:48

Yeah, and that comes with it, usually that's a fear of waste or guilt or legacy pressure. You feel like I think as a parent, I mean, I have adult kids, and there's a bit that I would imagine we all feel of it's up to you to preserve this legacy of their childhood. Um, but it's really not. They they have their own memory bank of their legacy of their childhood, and you didn't live it as the child going through it, so it's not it's not on you to preserve it in that way.

Jodi Rosko 14:27

Well, especially not to preserve it for them. You can preserve your own like parenting legacy in a small, again, we always talk about like sm small uh bin or some, you know, something like that. And letting kit go of your kids' stuff isn't letting go of their childhood or your parenting or your memory of their childhood or any of that stuff. Like that isn't. I think people hold on to that stuff because that time in their life is gone and they miss some part of that time in their life, but it's it is where it is in their life, and that's stuff is just stuff. It's the stories of of your childhood and you're with them. So their legacy for themselves, like you said, is different than your legacy of your parenting. It's it's it's two different things, and I think people do feel responsible for st for creating their kids' yeah memory when they kids have totally different memories.

Heather Fisher 15:26

Yeah. And it when it doesn't match up, it's not you've done all of that and it doesn't hit the mark.

Jodi Rosko 15:33

Well, and then you get upset because you're like, well, they don't want these things that I have saved for them forever, and they don't want them often. They might have wanted something different or you know, whatever that is. I think it that's a huge thing just about communication too.

Heather Fisher 15:46

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 15:46

Like as we go along. Um, but yeah, so that's that's so saving stuff for my kids, the I might use it someday, you know, that scarcity, yeah. Um for future regret, like thinking, oh my gosh, like I'm gonna I'm gonna throw away something. I think I think people who are perfectionists too are very nervous about throwing away the wrong thing.

Heather Fisher 16:12

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 16:13

Like, what if I do it wrong? What if I get rid of things that later I want back? And you know, and I'm not saying that could never happen, but the amount of things, like if you got rid of a hundred things, could one thing be something you're like, oh gosh, I wish I had that back? And really would it change your life that much if you did have it back, or are you just having a main, you know, a moment a moment of memory where you're like, oh, I want to see that thing again or whatever?

Heather Fisher 16:40

Yeah, I I feel like when we meet clients that have been through this process and done it um, you know, in a in a careful way and and downsized where they've downsized their stuff along with their space, they everybody wishes they did it sooner and we rarely meet people with any regret about the things that they donated or sold or gave away. Um you know, they're just you're you're in exchange for, like you said, the one thing that you might have a pang of regret about, on the flip side, you're gaining so much. Um, you know, it's not what you're losing or giving away, it's what you're gaining for yourself and your life on that exchange. So um I think the I might use it someday is the time to mark something, and if that someday is not within the next six months, uh that's an easy way to get rid of it.

Jodi Rosko 17:42

I think I might use it someday is totally procrastination. That is just you just choosing not to make that decision right now.

Heather Fisher 17:50

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 17:50

Um and there are I mean there are definitely um uh things that you know, mindsets that we've grown up with, um, especially um if that can has been passed down in your family of people who have lived through a time when there was scarcity or something like that, and they really feel like they've passed that on to you feeling like, oh my gosh, like I might not be able to, you know, have that again, or that scarcity mindset can be strong.

Heather Fisher 18:18

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 18:18

Um so you have to kind of work through that for yourself.

Heather Fisher 18:22

Um I think a a good question to ask at that point, if you're struggling with that, um, and and I totally understand where that mindset can come from is who could use this today instead of I might need this someday. Who needs it today? Yeah. And if if there are items, I mean we see this a lot in household items, not the heirlooms, not the that it's the day-to-day tools or kitchenware or things like that. And there is a lot of need out there, and so you're you know, maybe probably not, but maybe someday thought process is who could benefit from that today.

Jodi Rosko 19:06

Well, I think that rolls into the next justification, which is it's still good. Yeah. So that absolutely same thing. It's still good, and so it is probably still good. It probably still has life in it, it probably is still useful, and there is somebody who needs it and should use it. Absolutely. So th changing your mindset around that's actually not wrong when you say it's still good. Yeah. But it may not be good for you to keep. Like if you don't ever use it, then what good is it doing?

Heather Fisher 19:34

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 19:35

Right? It has to be doing good by being used.

Heather Fisher 19:38

And does that good, that use left in it, diminish over time with improper storage or you know, technology changing, any of you know, any of those type of things. Are you wasting that life left in it by delaying to where it's no longer good, which can happen with some things.

Jodi Rosko 20:01

Right. So Right. And then could I sell this? You know, that's that's that's another thing, like, oh, I could sell it. Well, do that. Have a garage sale if that's really what you want to do.

Heather Fisher 20:12

Um that's I think that's the key, is uh yes, that's a uh true statement. I could sell this. Maybe at the right price, you could sell most anything, but I could sell this. So do that. Right. Will you? Will you?

Jodi Rosko 20:29

Or are you just procrastinating again by like, oh, that probably is worth some money, I should keep it for right, you know, because you aren't. So if you really aren't using it and you do think that you could sell things, have the garage sale, put it on eBay, do whatever that looks like and ask those follow-up questions.

Heather Fisher 20:48

Where am I going to sell it? What audience am I putting this in front of? Be realistic with yourself. What am I willing to take for it? And then put those answers into action and move it out of your house.

Jodi Rosko 21:01

And if you have really if you have questions, you can look on eBay and see if things have sold um and see what they've sold for. So if you think, oh my gosh, I could totally sell this and on eBay, it's three dollars, like three dollars is what it is. Like it's not like yours is gonna be super special for $50. Like it's and sometimes things used to be worth more money than they are worth now. So you weren't, you know, wrong in at a different time frame, but now they may not be, or sometimes you may be right, like an it definitely worth money and you should sell it. So but you can do a little research around it. I guess what we're trying to say is don't just keep it as hidden clutter in a I'm gonna sell that someday kind of way. Yeah. Right? It's if you're going to sell it, then that'll be. If you don't act on them, right?

Heather Fisher 22:02

Yeah, yeah. So we have uh this stat uh that you know as as a a woman is you know feels very real here, but it says um a UCLA study found that women's stress hormones spiked when they were surrounded by too many household objects. And, you know, I think that that goes back to the other study we looked at where you're constantly your brain, you're less productive when you are constantly seeing objects in your line of sight when you're doing something else. You don't even have to be multitasking or anything. And you know, women often, I mean men too, but women in the household, there's oftentimes there are phases in life where we feel overwhelmed by just the the mind weight of everything that you're tracking, you know, what's on the calendar, what's for dinner, what do we need at the grocery store, all of that. And these studies are saying over and over that by having those items in your in your view, in your space, on your countertops, all of that, it's adding to our stress levels, even if you're not using the item or needing to use it, it's not part of your to-do list, it's still adding to your stress. So what better reason to do?

Jodi Rosko 23:36

I think that um I think that what happens is we stop seeing our environment, but it doesn't stop giving us anxiety. Yeah. And so we don't know that that is actually causing us more anxiety because we're used to whatever that looks like. But if we did spend the time and clear it off, like when you kid when you're kids, if you have kids that have like the super cluttered room, you know, and they take the day and clean it like we did when we were little. Um and and you can see, you can see on them like how they're like, oh my gosh, that feels so much better. And they haven't created the habits to keep it like that, but when they do it, you can see the anxiety, like I can see the anxiety leave them for that time when it's clean.

Heather Fisher 24:26

You know, you think about it if you've ever um gone in to treat yourself at a spa when you go into that environment, which is, you know, one of the most relaxing places where you walk in and you just feel better because it's, you know, open and bright and airy and every surface is not full of things. You know, they're not designing a spa to look like a flea market booth or whatever with all of the items packed onto the surfaces. And you know, your emotional weight when you walk in, it's just like, ah, and of course we're living in our homes. They're not always gonna feel like that total spa home. Yeah, model home or spa environment, but you can move closer to that on your day-to-day, you can tackle the tasks at hand without that added stress just from the things around you.

Jodi Rosko 25:27

I mean, when we go to people's houses to help them sell, um, and we kind of have a list of what they need to do to get ready for pictures, and it's clearing off the surfaces because that just doesn't look great in pictures, like it does not it does not comp you know, convey. Um, and so we have a list of things to do, and you know, clearing stuff out is a big one. And I cannot tell you how many times people are like, why don't I live like this? Like, why this feels so good? Like, I might even want to stay here. Like, why don't I live like this? They don't usually stay, but they do feel like, oh my gosh, this is so much better. Yeah, and so they had a reason to do that, and what normally, as we're just living day-to-day, we don't think like there's a reason to do that, but there genuinely is anxiety around it that you aren't even knowing that is being created.

Heather Fisher 26:18

Yeah, and it makes the whole process feel overwhelming because you're carrying that anxiety around how to approach all of this. So I think, you know, with the information that we share, we always want you to just realize that there's such a calmer, you know, life and process, even if you're just starting with your current environment and getting it ready to be able to not be paralyzed in that stress and overwhelm.

Jodi Rosko 26:52

Right. So whenever it is that you decide, hey, this house is too big and I want to go somewhere else, or this house isn't working, maybe it's not a bigger square footage, maybe it's just a different, you know, layout. But um you aren't like, ugh, but I can't do that right now because I have all the stuff I have to deal with. Like don't stop yourself in your life, you know. Just yeah, be able to live it. So um I think emotional versus practical value is is you know a problem. I think some people are extremely emotional about their stuff, and um, you know, that can it can outweigh the actual use usefulness of the stuff. They're just feeling emotional about it. And so um, we're trying to kind of create a different mindset around things. As you as we you listen to our podcast, that's a big part of what we talk about is how could your mindset be different? You know, looking at the idea of what your future self looks like and is your future self gonna even need that? Will they want that? You know, our identities, you know, there's some core stuff in our identities, but our identities do change like as as we go through life, you know, your kids and then your young adults, and then your parents, and then your empty nesters, and you know, they're different, they're different uh different identities, and you need different things for those those times in your life. And so the one that's coming up, that future fantasy self, yeah, you know, what are they gonna need? Um, what's that version gonna look like? Um, you know.

Heather Fisher 28:20

Yeah, the problem is for all of those phases, we're oftentimes not getting rid of what suited that phase. So by the time you're at the empty nester stage, you haven't let go of some of your childhood stuff, some of your teenage stuff, some of your, you know, uh young adult, no kids, you know, life hobbies stuff, your parenting stuff, and you're just completely have stacked each layer, each phase on top of each other without moving from one to the other. You're just cramming them on top of each other. And you know, that can be paralyzing.

Jodi Rosko 29:04

Right. So, you know, sometimes other reasons like we don't want to let go of things, you know, obviously emotional, it's it's sentimental. You know, you feel like it reminds you of somebody. Um so again, that's about the story of the person. It's not about the thing. Um, maybe write that story down or what it is that you remembered, that memory, or make a video about that. Um, some of it's about, like I said, our identity, but our identity is allowed to change a little bit as we go along. Um and maybe keep some little pieces of what that of a time of a time from a different time, but not everything. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Um sometimes it's a perceived security or control problems. Like we, you know, we are protective, it's a protective barrier for us. Like we are afraid of it's really all about fear. Like it really is keeping things for fear reasons. But um stuff can create a barrier of like it's it's a in your mind, it's not a real one, yeah. But of safety and security and control, and that's that's actually like a trauma, anxiety.

Heather Fisher 30:11

Yeah, and change change is hard and you know, harder for other, you know, some more than others, but change is hard for all of us, and you know, whether it's just moving into a different phase of life or moving into a different space in life, the change is hard in the moment, but the end result is almost always better. Yeah. So you just uh at some point need to push through the hard. Right. And we can help you with that, with resources or tips or strategies, whatever you need. Um, you know, that's my favorite part when we can help people through that hard change, it's it's better on the other side.

Jodi Rosko 30:58

Yeah, yeah. It it definitely like there are very few people that we've helped that, you know, felt like this isn't what they had wanted to do and they, you know, didn't get themselves in a different mindset that felt like, oh my gosh, you know, so many. I I just they're saying you know, we sh wish we would have done it sooner.

Heather Fisher 31:16

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 31:16

Yeah. You know, psychologically, we talk about this too. Psychologically, it's harder to give something up than it is to get to than it is to get something new. Like it's it's um uh it it gives you more pain, like giving something up than the joy of getting something new.

Heather Fisher 31:31

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 31:32

And so like your coffee cup thing that you talked about before, like it doesn't even have to be something important, it's just that it's yours now.

Heather Fisher 31:39

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 31:39

And so because of that, we feel like all this pain about letting go of things that really aren't meaningful to us. And so, um, and it's just because we own them and then six months from now we won't even remember we owned them. Like it's just the literal giving up of it.

Heather Fisher 31:56

Yeah, and I think that it uh it if you can build habits to um give yourself the time and space to do this over time, it is a lot easier than to delay all of these decisions and then it's you know a crisis or an a more urgent need to make a change and all of that feels like more loss all at once than just building small pieces into ha into your habits.

Jodi Rosko 32:30

Because things will bring up stories and if you can g have the time and the space to tell the stories and enjoy them and pass them on, then that it makes you be able to let it go eas more easily. Yeah. And so if you have to cram it all into a time, you aren't getting that space to tell the stories and whatever, just like it's oh, it's gotta go, you know, like that feels very frantic to a lot of people. And so we're trying not to trying to get that to not be the case for you.

Heather Fisher 32:59

Yes, start early and plan and and do a little bit each day for sure.

Jodi Rosko 33:03

So ask yourself when you see this um hid and clutter, uh, when was the last time I used this? Like I I kind of like your idea. Maybe you could get like little those little dots and just like stick it on things. And if you've had it for you know, the orange dot means you've had that for a year and you haven't used it, or take the dot off or when you have or something. Yeah. Um would you buy it again today? Like do like if would I rebuy this? Um am I keeping it out of guilt? Guilt's not a gift. Yes. Um what's the worst thing that would happen if I let this go? I like that question, right? Like, would you have to maybe buy it again?

Heather Fisher 33:42

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 33:43

You probably won't even want to buy it again, but is that the worst thing that could happen?

Heather Fisher 33:47

Yeah, I think especially um that goes back to what we've talked about on the kitchen stuff or those type of things. Like, if I got rid of the avocado slicer, what's the worst thing that could happen? I'd have to use a spoon, you know, instead. And so a lot of stuff like that is not as big of a deal as we make it into when we package the whole thought. I think it goes back to that break things down into small manageable tasks that you can complete. You don't have to think, would I do I want all of these things in my whole entire house and and you drawer at a time. Yes. One little thing at a time, those decisions become much easier.

Jodi Rosko 34:37

Yeah. Would you move it to your new house? Like would you put it in a box and spend money and time and effort to move it?

Heather Fisher 34:43

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 34:44

That's a good question.

unknown 34:45

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 34:45

Because sometimes you're like, oh, it's fine, because again, when there's room and it doesn't feel cluttered on the outside of the house and it's like, you know, the all the surfaces, whatever, if it's just all in your cabinets and your storage and you whatever, you don't think about that. But man, when you start putting those into boxes, there people are always like, I needed way more boxes than I thought that I needed.

Heather Fisher 35:06

Yeah. And the good news is if you're listening and you've already made the move and you took too much, you can start right where you are, and it's never too late to have, you know, those boxes that you packed and paid for. You know, you can let those mistakes go the same way we talk about you bought a shirt and you never wore it and it still has the tags on it. It's okay. That money is done, the choice is done. Just move that box to a donation pickup, and it's okay.

Jodi Rosko 35:40

Yep. Yeah. Because because I we do find people that do that. They decision fatigue is a real thing. And so they get to a point where they're like, okay, we're just moving and we're just taking this stuff that we haven't sorted yet with us. And then it doesn't fit in the new place, and then that feels anxiety inducing. Um and so if that's what's happened, it's okay. Just start going through it again. Just give yourself grace and just start going through it again, and you can do you can do that. So um we always talk about the someday box or the maybe box or whatever. So um as you're doing this, create your maybe box. Remember that it it's got rules. You you have to revisit it, you know. If you haven't revisited in six months, if you haven't gone sent gone and got something specific that you know is in the box, not open the box and look at it and see what's in there and if you want to have it back. But you if you've if there's something specifically in there that you're like, oh gosh, I need that, and gone and got it, fine. Um, but then we don't open it again, we just off to donation, right?

Heather Fisher 36:45

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 36:47

Um limit yourself with a bin or two bins if it's you know, holiday decorations or different things like that. You know, what could you fit in the in the in the smaller space and then that's you know what it is. And I again holiday decorations, I think a great time to do that is you know, as you're putting the things out, what are you putting out? What are you leaving in your bins? Because you know I mean sometimes there are things that just don't get put out anymore, which means it's time for them to go.

Heather Fisher 37:15

Yeah, yeah, that's the best time to do it. Or you know, be give yourself that space to put them, you know, don't cram everything back into boxes with that are half full of things you didn't put out. Put out right. If you didn't put out, yeah, it goes. Have those empty to just put away what what you enjoyed that season.

Jodi Rosko 37:36

Yeah. So um, yeah, so label those boxes and um let them go when the time comes. So um I think that sometimes we we have a hard time letting go like of the fact that you're not gonna be the scrap worker that you thought, or you're not gonna be the, you know, you're not gonna do that hobby that you thought you were gonna do, or or it's time the kids have gone and it's, you know, like letting go of some of that stuff, I think um you have to give yourself a minute to do it, but I also think you have to be realistic about what your life looks like.

Heather Fisher 38:15

Yeah, and I think that one way to that's definitely hard to let go of a version of ourselves that we aren't anymore due to whatever changes, but I think the best way to combat that is to be dreamy about what you are. What you are right now or what you want to fill that space with, not physical space with more stuff, but physical or you know, space of what hobby do you want to take up? What do you want to learn to do? Who do you want to spend that time with? Who, you know, what are you going to do with your grandparents or your grandkids or your friends, or what are you filling your life with besides just living in uh, you know, memories of looking back and and pain of, oh, I'm not doing that anymore. What can you fill it with to build that next stage?

Jodi Rosko 39:11

Yeah, because if you're living in the past, that's just um it's uh that's gonna just be a harder, more difficult place to live. Like it's just gonna make you feel sad, to be honest. Like it's just yeah. So it was, it was amazing, maybe. You know, write those stories of the parts that made you really happy about that time in your life. And then move be realistic and be dreamy about what the next thing could be. And maybe, you know, maybe you're done having Thanksgiving and it's time for the kids to take over. And you know, maybe you're not, maybe you're still gonna figure out how to make that happen in the next place. But again, like just really be honest with what it is that you want to do and what you want that to look like. But if you're if you're done with Thanksgiving, you don't need the play setting for 12 and you know, all other things.

Heather Fisher 40:01

And I think there's ways, you know, what's the one thing that you can incorporate a tradition from when you were doing it into where you're going to be celebrating it. You know, here's the prayer we always say, or here's the one platter I would love if you used the, you know, family turkey platter, you know, whatever that is, there are small ways besides having to create everything to be exactly the same as it was. And you take pieces of that to add to the new traditions, and that is how you weave such a story for your family, yeah.

Jodi Rosko 40:42

With it being intermingled from different parts of the family, different people that came down and their memories, your kids' memories, yeah, their new traditions, your old traditions. You can weave them all together.

Heather Fisher 40:57

Yeah, but that happens when you really intentionally choose what is the most important part to you, not an exact replication.

Jodi Rosko 41:08

And ask your kids what is the most important part to them, you know. Maybe they're like, oh my gosh, those bowls you used for whatever is the thing, you know, that's what I want it, you know. Yeah.

Heather Fisher 41:19

Who knows? Absolutely. And I think the same goes for your space. Um, we see people very hung up on needing their new space to be exactly the same. Yeah. And it doesn't work. And so there are ways where you can pick those very most important parts of your routine of where you were, and how can you bring a small piece? You know, this is the mug I always have my coffee in in the morning, that's doable, versus I need my dining table for 12 to fit in this smaller place because I always sit in this chair at the end. You know, there you have to find those um compromises to have it all work together.

Jodi Rosko 42:03

Yeah. So sitting and just thinking about genuinely like what are your favorite things? Like it's not gonna be everything, right? There are certain like you're if you just sat down and were like my top five, you know, favorite things and what are those? And can you bring those? What's that legacy gonna look like?

Heather Fisher 42:21

Yeah, absolutely. So we started talking about, you know, avoiding the hidden clutter, and I think um, you know, just asking yourself all these tough questions is the way that you can realize the places you hadn't even felt overwhelmed by and move through them a lot more easily and be ready for whatever's next. Yeah. And be dreamy about it.

Jodi Rosko 42:46

So are you saving it or are you avoiding it? That's be be really brutally honest with yourself about that.

Heather Fisher 42:52

Yeah, most of us probably fall in the avoiding it category. So let's all work towards being a little better about avoiding, and we'll be back next time with another episode, some more tips. If you need any resources, you can always find those on our website, www.downsizingroadmap.com, and we hope that you follow our podcast and leave us a review. Let us know if there are any topics you would love to hear us cover, and we will be back next time. Talk to you next time. Bye. Thanks for joining us on the Downsizing Roadmap Podcast. If you found this episode helpful, be sure to subscribe, leave us a review, and share it with someone who might need a little downsizing inspiration. Have questions or ideas for future episodes? Reach out to us on our website, www.downsizingroadmap.com. Until next time, let's keep simplifying and moving forward.