E06: Oxygen Mask: help! who's first?

I'm Alvat Garewal, and today, we’re diving into a powerful lesson in self-care and resilience—one that’s often overlooked yet crucial for living a balanced life.

If you’ve ever been on an aeroplane, you’ve heard the safety briefing: “Secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others.” At first, it may seem counterintuitive. After all, shouldn’t we help those in need first? But the truth is, if you can’t breathe, you won’t be able to help anyone at all.

This simple yet profound principle extends far beyond the confines of an aircraft—it applies to our everyday lives. Whether it’s our physical health, emotional well-being, or financial stability, we must ensure we are in a strong position before we can truly support others.

In this episode, we’ll explore why self-care is not selfish but essential, how neglecting ourselves can lead to burnout, and why prioritising our well-being allows us to show up fully for those who depend on us.

So, take a deep breath, settle in, and let’s talk about why putting on your own oxygen mask first is one of the most important things you can do—for yourself and for the people around you.

Transcript

Oxygen Mask

Introduction

Welcome back, dear listeners. I'm Alvat Garewal, and I'm excited to delve into this essential lesson in self-care and resilience.

Today, we're exploring the profound wisdom behind the instruction to "put your oxygen mask on first"—both in flight and in life. If you’ve ever been on an aeroplane, you’ve likely heard the safety procedures, and one of them is that in the event of an emergency, the oxygen masks may come down. The flight attendants say, “Secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others.” It's a seemingly simple directive, but its implications run deep. So, why is it so crucial?

The thing is that If you can breathe through your oxygen mask, then you’ll be able to help others. If you start helping others first, you are more than likely to suffer and run out of oxygen.

Why This Matters

At first, it might seem counterintuitive. If someone needs help, surely we should assist them first, right? But think about it—if you’re struggling for air and unable to breathe, you won’t be in any position to help anyone else. The same principle applies in life. If you neglect your own well-being—whether physically, emotionally, or financially—you won’t have the strength or resources to support others effectively.   

At its core, this directive is a powerful metaphor for prioritising self-care and well-being. It reminds us that we cannot effectively support others if we neglect our own needs. Balancing Responsibilities Without Neglecting Yourself

But how does this principle translate to the complex tapestry of life? 

In our daily interactions, we often find ourselves juggling multiple roles and responsibilities—as caregivers, friends, partners, and professionals. The pressure to meet the needs of others can be daunting, leading us to neglect our own well-being in the process.

Yet, we must remember that self-care is not selfish—it’s a fundamental act of self-preservation and compassion. By prioritising our own needs, we replenish our reserves, fortifying ourselves against the challenges that lie ahead. Only then can we show up fully for those who depend on us, offering them the support and love they deserve.

Filling Your Cup First

Think of it as filling your cup before pouring into the cups of others. When our own cup is empty, we have nothing left to give. But when we take the time to nourish ourselves—mind, body, and spirit—we overflow with abundance, radiating positivity and resilience to those around us.

The Importance of Financial Stability Before Helping Others

This applies not just to emotional or physical well-being but also to financial well-being. Many of us feel the urge to help others financially—whether it's family, friends, or charitable causes. While generosity is a beautiful trait, it is always better to give when you are in a stable financial position. Depriving yourself of essential needs to help someone else may create further stress and put you in a vulnerable position.

Once you have your ‘financial oxygen mask’ on—meaning you’re stable and secure—you can help others without putting yourself at risk. Just like in an aeroplane, if you run out of resources, you won’t be able to help anyone at all.

Self-Care is Not Selfish

Many of us carry a sense of guilt when it comes to prioritizing ourselves. We feel that taking time for self-care, rest, or personal growth is selfish. But in reality, it’s the most responsible thing we can do. When we are strong, healthy, and fulfilled, we have more to offer to others.

Example 1: Working to Exhaustion

We've all seen it—someone pushing themselves to meet a deadline, working long hours, skipping sleep, and surviving on caffeine. They think they’re being productive, but in reality, their performance is declining. Their thinking becomes foggy, their decision-making slows down, and they’re more likely to make mistakes. If they had just taken the time to rest, they would have been far more effective. The same goes for life—when we neglect rest, we are not at our best, and that affects not only us but those who rely on us.

Example 2: Parenting

Parents often put their children first, sometimes to the detriment of their own health. They sacrifice sleep, personal time, and even their own well-being. But a well-rested, emotionally stable parent is far more capable of nurturing a child than one who is completely drained. Taking time to rest, recharge, and maintain personal happiness doesn’t make you a bad parent—it makes you a better one.

Example 3: Emergency Workers

Firefighters, paramedics, and police officers are trained to assess situations before rushing in. They secure their own safety first because an injured or overwhelmed rescuer is of no use to the person in distress. This applies to us too—if we burn ourselves out trying to help everyone else, we’ll be in no position to provide any real support.

Seeking Help from Those Who Are Already Stable

Sometimes, we find ourselves in a position where we need help rather than being the helper. In such moments, it’s okay to reach out to those who already have their oxygen masks on. Seeking guidance, support, or assistance from people who are in a better position is not a weakness—it’s a strategy. Just as we cannot assist others if we are struggling for air, we should recognise when we need to lean on others who have the capacity to help.

Final Thoughts

So, my dear listeners, I encourage you to heed the wisdom of the oxygen mask metaphor in your own life. Take a moment to check in with yourself: Are you prioritising your own well-being? Are you giving yourself the care and attention you deserve? Are you in a position to help, or do you need to secure yourself first?

Remember, you are worthy of love, kindness, and compassion—starting with yourself. So, put on your oxygen mask first. By nurturing your own light, you’ll illuminate the path for others to follow.

As we conclude today’s episode, I invite you to share your reflections on this vital topic. How do you prioritise self-care in your own life? I’d love to hear from you.

You are in my thoughts.