E07: Difficulties: Avoid or Face

In today’s episode, we’re diving into something we all face—difficulties.
I’ll be sharing a powerful lesson from Michael Caine about how obstacles in life don’t have to stop us—in fact, we can use them to our advantage.
Whether it’s in sport, music, business, or everyday situations, how we respond to challenges defines us.
So join me as we explore how to stop running from difficulties… and start using them to grow, learn, and even help others.

Transcript

Hello everyone, and welcome

I’m Alvat Garewal.

Today, I want to talk about something that touches all of us—difficulties.

Moments in life where something doesn’t go our way. A situation gets in the way. Plans may fall apart. People, circumstances, or maybe even ourselves… create challenges.

But more importantly, I want to talk about what we do when difficulties show up.

Do we run? Do we avoid? Or… do we face them?

I came across an interview recently with Sir Michael Caine, and what he said really stuck with me.
 He shared a story from when he was a young actor, still learning the ropes.

He explained that in one scene, he had to enter through a door—but there was a chair in the way.
 He turned to the director and said,
 "I can’t come in, there’s a chair blocking me."

The director looked at him and simply asked,
 "Why?"

Michael replied,
 "Well, it’s difficult, there’s a chair there."

And the director told him something powerful:
 "Use the difficulty."
 If it’s a comedy—fall over the chair and make the audience laugh.
 If it’s a drama—kick the chair out of the way, smash through it, make it intense.
 But whatever you do—don’t let the chair restrict you.
 Use it to your advantage."

That lesson stayed with him—not just in acting, but in life.

 "Use the difficulty."
 And it stuck with me.

 Not to "ignore" the difficulty.
 Not to "complain" about the difficulty.
 But to use it.

And that’s what I want to explore today.

The Fork in the Road: Run or Face It

Whenever we hit a tough moment, we have two clear paths.

One—avoid it. Pretend it’s not there. Push it under the rug. Walk away.

Or number two—face it head-on. Feel uncomfortable. Maybe even fear it, but stay. 

Deal with it.

Think about it like driving—something I know a little bit about!
 If you're on a road and there's an obstruction, what do you do?

You can swerve, avoid it, but what if there’s oncoming traffic?  you might just stop there and wait. You could find a way to deal with it, remove it, get help with it.

Avoiding Difficulties: What’s the Cost?

Let’s be honest—avoiding feels good at that moment because you’re putting it away and out of mind.

You don’t want the awkward conversation at work, so you postpone it.

You don’t want to admit a mistake, so you brush it aside.

You avoid practicing your weaknesses, because it’s uncomfortable.

But every time we avoid… we pay later.

That awkward conversation becomes resentment.
 That small mistake becomes a bigger problem.
 That weakness never improves.

And after a while, life feels smaller.
 Your confidence shrinks.
 You stop trusting yourself to handle the hard stuff.

Facing Difficulties: Where the Magic Happens

Now, let's turn that around.

What happens when we face The Difficulty?

Michael Caine tells the story about being on set. There’s furniture blocking his movement in a scene. Normally, the actor would ask for it to be cleared.

But the director tells him:
 "Use the difficulty."

So Michael incorporates it. Makes it part of the scene. And the scene becomes richer, more natural, more powerful.

And that got me thinking—this applies everywhere.

Examples Across Life

In Sport:
Take Michael Jordan—cut from his high school basketball team.
Most people would quit. He used that rejection as fuel.
Every training session, every match, he remembered that difficulty.
And it made him the player we know today.

In Music:
 Beethoven.
 Imagine being a composer… and losing your hearing.
 Most would give up.
 But he didn’t just continue.
 He composed some of his greatest work after going deaf.
He used the difficulty.

In Business:
 Steve Jobs—fired from Apple, the company he co-founded.
 A public failure.
 But instead of letting it define him, he founded new companies, learned, and came back stronger.
 That difficulty led to Apple’s biggest successes.

How Do We "Use" the Difficulty?

Let’s break it down practically:

1. Pause.
    When something hard happens, resist the urge to react immediately.
    Take a breath. Ask: What is this trying to show me?
   
   
   
2. Reframe.
    Is this an obstacle… or an opportunity to learn something new?
    To improve a skill? To change direction?
   
   
   
3. Take Small Action.
    You don’t have to fix everything all at once.
    Break it down—what’s the next step I can take today?
   
   
   
4. Share It.
    Here’s the key:
    When you’ve faced a difficulty, you now carry wisdom.
    You can help others facing the same thing.
    Whether it’s a friend, a colleague, a student—you become the guide.
   
   
   

Personal Reflection

You know, in my own journey—whether it’s teaching people to drive, running businesses, or even organizing events—difficulties show up. All the time.

I’ve had systems crash, people cancel last minute, plans fall apart.

Early on, I’d get frustrated.
 I’d try to control everything so nothing could go wrong.

But life doesn’t work like that, does it?

Eventually, I learned:
 It’s not about avoiding the hard moments.
 It’s about how you show up when they come.

Sometimes the very thing that feels like it’s blocking you… is actually shaping you.

Bringing It Back: How Will You Respond?

So today, I want to leave you with a question:

What’s that one difficulty you’re facing right now?

And how can you use it?

Maybe it’s a challenging relationship.
 Maybe it’s something at work.
 Maybe it’s something within yourself.

Instead of running—pause.
 Instead of avoiding—face it.
 Instead of complaining—use it.

Because the person you become after facing difficulties…
 That’s the person who grows.

Thank you so much for listening today.

If this resonated with you, share it with someone who might need to hear it too.

And remember… next time life throws a challenge at you—
 Don’t just get through it.
 Use the difficulty.

Until next time.

You are in my thoughts