E12: Build or Demolish: Doing what's needed

"Build or Demolish"

Have you ever stood in front of a magnificent building and wondered—what came before this? What had to be cleared, broken, or removed for this to rise?

Hi, I’m Alvat Garewal, and today, we’re diving into a powerful idea:
 Before we build anything new in life—do we take the time to demolish what no longer serves us?

Whether it’s a relationship, a mindset, or a personal goal… building something lasting often requires us to start fresh. And that means being brave enough to tear down what’s broken—even if it’s familiar.

Let’s talk about the courage to let go, the wisdom to start again, and how strong foundations create lasting legacies.

Transcript

Podcast Episode: “Build or Demolish” 

Hi and welcome back.
 My name is Alvat Garewal. 

Today, I want to explore a thought that came to me recently while admiring some stunning buildings—structures that clearly took time, planning, and intention. 

I found myself wondering: 

Why were they built here?
 What was in the mind of the person who designed them? And before that—what was here before this was built? 

That’s when something struck me:
 Before we build anything new—whether it’s a building, a relationship, a 

business, or even a new version of ourselves—we face a choice. 

Do we build on what’s already there?
Or... do we first demolish what's no longer serving us? 

The Temptation to Build on What Exists 

Let’s start with the obvious:
 It’s easier—at least in the short term—to build on something that 

already exists. 

Think about construction.
 You see a plot of land with a foundation already laid down. No need to 

dig. No need to break anything. You just start building on top. 

It feels quicker. Cleaner. Cheaper. 

But here’s the catch: 

If that old foundation was weak, unstable, or cracked... it doesn’t matter how beautiful the new building is. It won’t last. 

And in life, this happens all the time. 

Example: Relationships 

Let’s say someone’s come out of a difficult relationship.
 Maybe there were trust issues. Miscommunication. Or just deep 

emotional wounds left unspoken. 

Then, not long after, they jump into a new relationship—hoping it’ll be different. 

But they’ve built it on the same foundation.
 The fears are still there. The hurt is still there. The doubts linger beneath 

the surface. 

They’ve decorated the house beautifully, but the cracks below are growing. 

Eventually, what happens? It crumbles. 

And it’s not because the people weren’t good. It’s because the foundation wasn’t reset.
 It wasn’t rebuilt with intention. 

Sometimes, we have to demolish the old before we can build something that lasts. 

Example: Personal Growth 

Take personal transformation. 

A lot of people try to improve their lives by adding things: – A new routine
 – A new diet
 – A new job 

– A new city 

But if the old mindset is still in place—full of self-doubt, fear of failure, or limiting beliefs—then the change is only surface level. 

They’re building on top of old concrete. 

And after a while, they find themselves back in the same place. Same habits. Same struggles.
 Why? Because they didn’t clear the ground. They didn’t start fresh. 

So When Do We Build, and When Do We Demolish? 

It’s a tough question. Because starting over is hard. Demolition means loss. Letting go. Facing the mess. It’s noisy. It’s emotional. It’s uncomfortable. 

But sometimes, it’s the most necessary thing.
Here are a few ways to know when it’s time to demolish before you build: 

1. You Keep Repeating Patterns 

If the same problems keep showing up—whether in your work, relationships, or habits—it might be time to clear the foundation. Start fresh. 

You can’t build new outcomes on old behaviours. 

2. You’re Building Just to Avoid the Past 

Sometimes we rush into the “new” just to escape the “old.” A new relationship to forget the last.
 A new job to run away from the old boss. 

But if we’re running, not rebuilding, we’re not creating strength. We’re just covering the cracks with wallpaper. 

🔹 

🔹 

3. You Haven’t Grieved the Old Yet 

Grief doesn’t just come after losing people—it comes after losing versions of ourselves, chapters of life, dreams that didn’t work out. 

Before you build, make sure you’ve honoured what came before. Sometimes, the act of letting go is the true beginning. 

But Let’s Not Forget—We Were Meant to Build 

This isn’t all about demolition. We are, by nature, builders. 

We build careers, families, friendships, memories, dreams, even legacies. 

And when we do it right—on fresh, strong, healthy foundations—it’s beautiful. 

Just like those magnificent buildings I saw...
 They stood tall not just because of their design, but because of what 

they were built on. 

Example: The Business Reboot 

Imagine someone who starts a business in his early twenties. It fails within a year. 

He loses money. Confidence. And maybe most painfully—his sense of identity. 

At first, he tries to rebuild using the same strategies. Same logo. Same partners. Same mindset.
 It fails again. 

Only when he steps back, demolishes the old model, takes time to reflect, and really assess what went wrong...
he can start again—with clarity, not just hope. 

Then that second business will thrive. Because it’s not just built—it’s rebuilt. 

🔹 

What Does Demolition Look Like in Real Life? 

It’s not bulldozers and sledgehammers.
 It’s quiet. Intentional. Sometimes invisible to the outside world. 

– It’s ending a toxic pattern.
 – Saying no to what no longer aligns.
 – Taking time to heal instead of rushing to distract.
 – Letting go of “who you were” to discover “who you are becoming.” 

Final Thoughts: Building With Intention 

So, ask yourself: 

What am I trying to build right now?
 Am I building on a clean, strong foundation—or am I stacking 

something new on top of something broken?
 What do I need to let go of before I move forward? 

Remember: building takes vision. But demolishing takes courage. You might need both. 

Because the tallest towers don’t just appear—they rise, one brick at a time, on a foundation that was prepared, cleared, and made ready. 

Thank you for joining me today. 

If this episode made you pause, reflect, or even made you want to pick up the hammer—or put it down—share it with someone else who might need to hear it too. 

Until next time,
 You are in my thoughts.