Welcome back to the Eldership Formation Series.
In our last episode, we explored what eldership looks like at Glow — the posture, purpose, and spiritual weight of the role.
In this session, we’re going deeper into the biblical qualifications for eldership, and what it means to live a life of personal integrity.
We’re not talking about perfection. We’re talking about spiritual maturity, visible fruit, and a life worth imitating.
SECTION 1: WHAT SCRIPTURE ACTUALLY SAYS
Let’s begin with the Word.
Paul gives two clear lists of elder qualifications — one in 1 Timothy 3, and one in Titus 1. Here’s a summary:
“An elder must be above reproach, faithful to their spouse, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach…”
“…not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. They must manage their own family well…”
Let’s pause right there.
This is not about having it all together.
But it is about having a consistent, Christlike life — at home, in private, in public, and under pressure.
These qualifications aren’t checklist items — they’re spiritual fruit.
And they’re not just for Sundays.
They show up in how you lead your household.
How you deal with tension.
How you use your words.
And how you walk through stress, disappointment, or failure.
SECTION 2: INTEGRITY STARTS AT HOME
One of the most confronting but essential qualifications Paul lists is this:
“If anyone does not know how to manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church?” — 1 Timothy 3:5
That hits different, doesn’t it?
At Glow, we believe household leadership is the first proving ground for eldership.
This doesn’t mean your marriage is perfect or your kids are angels.
But it does mean:
You’re spiritually present at home
You take responsibility for your family’s wellbeing
You lead with love, consistency, and prayer
It means your integrity isn’t a Sunday performance.
It’s a Monday-to-Saturday lifestyle.
The people who know you best — your spouse, kids, close friends — should be the first to say:
“Yes — this person lives what they preach.”
If that’s not the case, it’s not disqualification — but it might be a sign to pause and invest at home before stepping into church oversight.
SECTION 3: SELF-CONTROL & SPIRITUAL SOBRIETY
Another consistent thread in both lists is self-control and sobriety.
This is about more than alcohol.
It’s about being spiritually clear-headed — not easily provoked, erratic, addicted to approval, power, money, or praise.
Ask yourself:
Am I able to stay calm under pressure?
Do I think before I speak?
Am I consistent with my spiritual disciplines, even when no one sees?
Paul also says elders must not be:
Quick-tempered
Greedy
Arrogant
Or “overbearing” — which means controlling or manipulative
We want elders who are gentle but strong.
Leaders who can carry tension without escalating it.
Who can speak hard truth without crushing.
Who can carry authority without ego.
Because this is spiritual authority — not a power trip.
SECTION 4: HOSPITALITY, HUMILITY & HOLINESS
Let’s close with three quiet signs of maturity that often get overlooked:
Hospitality — Are people welcome around your table? Do you make space for others?
Humility — Do you admit when you're wrong? Are you teachable?
Holiness — Not just avoiding sin, but being set apart. Do you live in a way that reflects Jesus?
These aren’t flashy traits.
But they build trust, health, and longevity.
At Glow, we’re not looking for leaders who know everything.
We’re looking for people who live in a way that’s consistent, transparent, and surrendered.
CLOSING & REFLECTIONs
As you reflect this week, ask yourself:
Where am I growing in personal integrity and spiritual maturity?
Would those closest to me — my spouse, kids, friends — affirm my readiness for eldership?
Let the Holy Spirit speak — not to shame you, but to shape you.
Eldership begins at home.
And the best elders are the ones who don’t stop growing, even when they’re recognised.
Thanks for leaning in — and I’ll see you in Episode 3, where we’ll talk about the spiritual weight of oversight and how to carry it without collapsing.
