Speaker 1: The topic is how do you make major life decisions?
Speaker 1: So we're going to pray, then we're going to jump into it.
Speaker 1: Okay, heavenly Father, we thank you for this day.
Speaker 1: I pray right now in Jesus' name, that you would give us clarity of thought, that you would allow students to be able to ask important questions of what they're facing, the fears that we have faced with a lot of the decisions.
Speaker 1: I know that there is a decision fatigue.
Speaker 1: There are so many options in front of us that it can be very scary.
Speaker 1: And so, father, we pray right now in Jesus name, that your spirit would give us a clarity as we communicate.
Speaker 1: In Jesus name, we pray, amen.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 1: So, again, interactive, you ask questions.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm going to give you some kind of step-by-step things that, pastorally, I would want you to be able to walk through.
Speaker 1: So let's first ask the question what sort of decisions?
Speaker 1: When you heard this title how to make major life decisions and you were like good, I want to show up for that one.
Speaker 1: What sorts of decisions are you facing that are in the back of your mind, that you're like please, god, do not let me mess this up, all right, okay, in what way?
Speaker 1: Like I'm in college right now.
Speaker 1: So just think about like the future, like what I want to do, kind of like what path?
Speaker 1: Okay, how do I find that path of like what's what's the right job?
Speaker 1: Okay, others, what kind of college you're gonna go to?
Speaker 1: What college to go to?
Speaker 1: Is that on anyone's mind?
Speaker 1: Okay, I know?
Speaker 1: Uh, what about even even these lines?
Speaker 1: I know that, as a freshman going into Bernie High School, you have to choose a path.
Speaker 1: Like, good grief, I wasn't thinking about anything geared towards the future as a freshman, all I was thinking about was sports, and you make me choose a path that I'm supposed to kind of sort through.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're wrestling that with my oldest right now.
Speaker 1: Okay, that can cause a lot of fear.
Speaker 1: Like, oh my gosh, I chose the auto path and now I got in here and I don't want this.
Speaker 1: I'm stuck.
Speaker 1: I'm so far behind.
Speaker 1: How am I going to catch up?
Speaker 1: Am I speaking to anyone?
Speaker 1: You feel that it's already so hot in here?
Speaker 1: I'm going to tell them.
Speaker 1: All right, give me some more examples.
Speaker 1: Garrett, it's hot in here.
Speaker 1: We need air.
Speaker 1: Someone, someone around here, make it cooler, all right?
Speaker 1: Yes, ma'am, a lot of us are going to college next year.
Speaker 1: I guess decisions on church groups to join communities.
Speaker 1: Inviting communities, yeah, excellent, good, praying that the Lord opens up those right friendship groups.
Speaker 1: Okay, so here's just some of the ones I listed out.
Speaker 1: Right Career choice what college do I go to?
Speaker 1: How do I know what job to take and whom should I marry?
Speaker 1: You guys may be a little young for that, but it starts to get real serious, real quick, especially when you're in college.
Speaker 1: I know, as you get on the back row, all right, and you start thinking about, oh, my goodness, is this the right person?
Speaker 1: Can I marry them?
Speaker 1: Ah, that's for the rest of your life.
Speaker 1: What if I marry the wrong person?
Speaker 1: Oh, how horrible.
Speaker 1: You just kind of stuck, okay, um, we're going to take, I'm going to give you, uh, a handful of, uh, uh, kind of step-by-step walkthrough.
Speaker 1: But again, interaction, you interacting with me, you asking questions, uh, cause, what I'm going to give you, I I prepared this long time ago, dealing with college students who are asking these sorts of questions.
Speaker 1: We're going to open the doors.
Speaker 1: It's way too hot, just tell them, you guys.
Speaker 1: You guys be quiet because it's hot.
Speaker 1: Yes, do whatever you can.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I'll take anything.
Speaker 1: I don't preach to a hot room.
Speaker 1: They drop like flies.
Speaker 1: Okay, um, so again, interaction as we walk through it.
Speaker 1: So I had a handful of decisions in mind and I prepared this for college students as, as they're facing these major life decisions, so kind of some step-by-step, easy things to knock out up front.
Speaker 1: All right, the first, first step Okay, you're going to write this down in your notes.
Speaker 1: We must ask ourselves what does the Bible say about it?
Speaker 1: And if the Bible gives clear instruction, you know what we do, you do it.
Speaker 1: Oh, that was nice and easy, right?
Speaker 1: I know that there are times when you want to really pray about it and think maybe God will give me a different answer.
Speaker 1: But if the Bible has spoken clearly about it, guess what?
Speaker 1: I'll tell you a secret.
Speaker 1: You don't even have to pray about it.
Speaker 1: You just do it because God's already spoken.
Speaker 1: All right, so if it's like, should I do something inappropriate with my boyfriend or girlfriend and there's pressure there, guess what?
Speaker 1: You don't have to pray about it.
Speaker 1: The answer is no.
Speaker 1: Okay, now you can pray that the Lord would give you outs and help you in temptation and take things a different way, but you don't have to pray.
Speaker 1: God, do you really want me to do this?
Speaker 1: You already know the answer to that Okay, so if the Bible speaks, clearly, done.
Speaker 1: Now there are situations where there are competing issues you'll deal with this in ethics whenever you get to college uh, where there are competing issues and you have to make a decision.
Speaker 1: Okay, and how do you do that?
Speaker 1: So a classic example, and this is a true example If you've ever read Corrie ten booms the hiding place.
Speaker 1: So they're a Dutch family that is hiding Jews.
Speaker 1: They're Christian, but they're hiding Jews because the Nazis are killing all the Jews.
Speaker 1: Okay, and they're hiding Jews in their house, and they actually have.
Speaker 1: They've.
Speaker 1: They've carved out a section, uh, under their floor and uh, so that they can get underneath their hardwood floors.
Speaker 1: It's a removable spot.
Speaker 1: And then they throw the rug over it in the table, okay, and Nazis come in one day and ask the question to the family are there any Jews in here?
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 1: What does the Bible say about lying?
Speaker 1: Huh, lying's bad.
Speaker 1: So what do you do?
Speaker 1: See, there's a paradox.
Speaker 1: There's competing evil outcomes.
Speaker 1: Now, in this particular story, true story, corrie Ten Boom and her entire household, entire household.
Speaker 1: They, of course, say nothing.
Speaker 1: They say, of course, there's not Jews here, but Corey's sister I can't remember her name off the top of my head, corey's sister felt so convicted that she should not lie that she burst out in the moment there are Jews hiding underneath the table.
Speaker 1: And then the Nazis go over to uh, look under the table and she burst out in uncontrollable laughter, nervous laughter, and they ended up thinking that she's uh messing with them and they turn around and leave.
Speaker 1: And then afterwards everyone had choice words for sister.
Speaker 1: Right, they were like what is wrong with you?
Speaker 1: Okay, all right.
Speaker 1: So a little complexity to.
Speaker 1: Sometimes there are competing desires.
Speaker 1: What I would tell you in that situation?
Speaker 1: Right, there are, there are greater evils and you should choose the lesser evil whenever there's complexity.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's keep moving, all right.
Speaker 1: Second thing Okay, uh, as you're making difficult life decisions, as you're trying to figure out what college do I go to, what career path, guess what I know it's on the board Use your brain.
Speaker 1: Did you know that that's spiritual?
Speaker 1: Did you know that God gave you a brain on purpose, so that you would reason?
Speaker 1: Most of the time, god is going to use natural means to open and close doors in your life, and that is through using your brain, figuring out certain things that you are gifted at figuring out certain things that you like to do, that you have aptitude to do.
Speaker 1: So God has given you natural talent, he's given you certain abilities, okay, and all of that is good, really really good, okay, so I'm going to give you a test case, as we kind of go through this.
Speaker 1: When I was coming out of college at A&M, I had three different job opportunities, okay and um, I'd gone through, got my civil engineering degree and, coming out interviewed, uh, through the school, I got three different job opportunities.
Speaker 1: Uh, two of them were in Dallas and one of them was in Fort Worth.
Speaker 1: My I'm from Dallas, my family, my parents lived in Dallas at the time, my sister in Dallas, and so two were in Dallas, one was in Fort Worth.
Speaker 1: And I, like many of you with decision fatigue or overload, was really really afraid of what if I choose the wrong job and just mess up the path that the Lord has for me for the rest of my life?
Speaker 1: I'm on the wrong path and I've just messed this whole thing up.
Speaker 1: I chose, I chose the wrong job.
Speaker 1: Now here I am.
Speaker 1: God had this path for me and, by the way, this path led to just amazing things, just blessings of the Lord and the perfect wife and family, and everything was going to be great if I chose this path, but this one, that's the wrong one.
Speaker 1: It's kind of like a game show, like you chose the wrong door.
Speaker 1: Behind that door is a chair with a bunch of porcupine quills sticking out of it.
Speaker 1: Okay, stinks for you, but that's what you did.
Speaker 1: Now you sit in it.
Speaker 1: Okay, so I have these three jobs and that'll be kind of the test case.
Speaker 1: So here, as I'm trying to choose between three jobs, there was nothing biblical about, like the Bible didn't say choose this job or not that job.
Speaker 1: Right, that would have been nice, but it doesn't.
Speaker 1: So then we move to.
Speaker 1: All right, so use your brain.
Speaker 1: So I suggest using a T chart that has pros and cons, what's positive about this place, what's negative about that place and start listing these things out.
Speaker 1: Okay, by the way, again, you need to hear me as your pastor saying what I'm about to say.
Speaker 1: This is spiritual.
Speaker 1: God created you to use your brain.
Speaker 1: That is a good thing, okay, so I listed out well, the one that was in Fort Worth is further away from my parents, so that that one, like well, that one goes down on the list, and then there are other things about the job, okay, um, and then just kind of list out there's good parts of this company, good parts of that company, okay, so you use your brain.
Speaker 1: Next, seek wise counsel.
Speaker 1: Okay, what do you guys think I mean by seek wise counsel?
Speaker 1: All right, you can go to your pastor.
Speaker 1: All right, you got friends that say about it.
Speaker 1: A mentor?
Speaker 1: All right, yeah, someone that you think is wise, that has years of experience, that's been through whatever you're going through.
Speaker 1: And the other important thing was they need to know you the closer that they know you.
Speaker 1: By the way, I hope every one of you has someone that can speak truth into your life.
Speaker 1: Do you have someone who will tell you the hard truth?
Speaker 1: Okay, who will tell you look, I know you and you don't need to be doing that.
Speaker 1: Okay, that may be fine for some people.
Speaker 1: You don't need to be doing that.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right.
Speaker 1: So, seeking wise counsel, seek them out.
Speaker 1: A mentor, someone you know that you can go to and sit and have these conversations, okay, uh, usually you'll have like a parental figure, but you'll also need people that are outside that window, especially as you get older.
Speaker 1: Okay, this guy in the back.
Speaker 1: He said friends, all right, friends can be good, okay, and they can be bad.
Speaker 1: Uh, in part, I would tell you here I want you to seek someone that's older in life.
Speaker 1: Okay, um, that's, that's gone through it.
Speaker 1: You can.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of wisdom that comes with just experiencing life.
Speaker 1: Okay, grandparents, absolutely All right.
Speaker 1: Next one, step four Surrender your motives.
Speaker 1: Guys, this is key.
Speaker 1: As you think through different options, you will be, uh, let me think of how to explain this.
Speaker 1: All right, so, uh, I once had a college student who had, uh, uh, I was up near Wayland Baptist university and he was, he was in ministry, uh, he was a ministerial student.
Speaker 1: He had gotten his bachelor's degree in Bible from Wayland and he was looking to go get his master's degree from another Institute and he, he was working with me as a mentor and we were walking through this, okay, and he got accepted into Princeton.
Speaker 1: For Princeton, uh, whatever the I can't remember what they call their theological, uh, branch of Princeton, right, but it is right, it's Ivy League.
Speaker 1: Everyone in here knows, oh, my gosh, you got into Princeton.
Speaker 1: Now, what you may not know about Princeton is Princeton as a theological institute in that top part, just that theology degree is very, very liberal, that is, most of the teachers don't actually believe in the Bible, uh, and instead they will teach a whole bunch of stuff that undermines the Bible.
Speaker 1: They don't take the Bible as truth.
Speaker 1: Well, here here's a guy that I, um, was had mentored and through Waylon and Waylon's teaching, right, uh, that the Bible is the word of God, and he wants to go on into that area.
Speaker 1: And so here we are wrestling with this question of should he go to Princeton?
Speaker 1: All right, and we get to this spot here, right, and what do you think I say to him about Princeton?
Speaker 1: Him about Princeton?
Speaker 1: Yeah, why do you want to go?
Speaker 1: Okay, this is the key, one of the major keys, as you work through, uh, important life decisions.
Speaker 1: And here's the deal you got to be honest with yourself.
Speaker 1: If you are not honest, it's kind of like Nate's illustration this morning of like his little girl just hiding in plain sight.
Speaker 1: The reality is, is if, if you are walking with the Lord by the way, I said this, I forgot to say this upfront every step of the way.
Speaker 1: We're bathing in prayer, right, we're going to the Lord in prayer.
Speaker 1: We're asking the Lord to anoint our just reasonable thinking.
Speaker 1: We're asking the Lord to show us who's a good mentor that we can talk to Every step of the way.
Speaker 1: These are going to be key moments, because if you want advice from me, you want the Lord's wisdom through all of this.
Speaker 1: But then you get to this point here where you have to be honest with yourself about why am I actually?
Speaker 1: What am I seeking between the choices that I'm looking at?
Speaker 1: What do I genuinely care about this?
Speaker 1: Okay, and you have to be honest.
Speaker 1: So are there good reasons to go to Princeton?
Speaker 1: Yeah, list some of them.
Speaker 1: Looks good on your resume after and you might get a sweet job yeah, all right, so it can certainly open doors.
Speaker 1: Is it a rigorous theological institute?
Speaker 1: Right, okay.
Speaker 1: Is it good to seek higher education and to work hard?
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: Okay, so we could list off a number of things that would be yeah, maybe the lord is calling you to go there.
Speaker 1: What could be a false reason for why you would want to go to princeton theological school?
Speaker 1: Prestige.
Speaker 1: So why is prestige bad?
Speaker 1: Well, because it's maybe probably not conducive towards your real goals okay, or at least your legitimate goals, yeah, so working through this idea of how, how something could be advantageous, way but simultaneously really kind of prideful or sought after for the wrong reasons at the same time.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm trying to get at here.
Speaker 1: When you face a lot of decisions, you may face decisions in your life in terms of, let's say, what college you're supposed to go to or kind of what career path you want to take, and maybe one of your parents is like you should do this.
Speaker 1: Okay, could that be a good reason to do it?
Speaker 1: Being obedient to your parents?
Speaker 1: It could be.
Speaker 1: Could it be a bad reason at the same time?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 1: What's the bad portion?
Speaker 1: That's there All right.
Speaker 1: So, like, if you look at your motives and your motive is out of fear, if your motive is out of well, I really hope my dad would love me and pay attention to me if I did this.
Speaker 1: Did you guys know that?
Speaker 1: Andre Agassi anyone know who Andre Agassi was is All right.
Speaker 1: He's one of the greatest American tennis players ever, back in my generation, and he had a whole bunch of commercials because he was good looking and had long hair.
Speaker 1: And he had a whole bunch of commercials because he was good looking and had long hair.
Speaker 1: Anyways, at the end of his career he came out with his biography.
Speaker 1: In his biography he stated I hated tennis, absolutely hated tennis.
Speaker 1: Hall of Famer Okay, hated tennis.
Speaker 1: He said the only reason I played tennis was because my dad made me.
Speaker 1: Okay, terrible motive to work through this.
Speaker 1: All right, but when you're alone with the Lord in prayer, you have to be honest and be able to list out Okay, this, this is a wrong motive for me to go to Princeton.
Speaker 1: God, I don't want to go to Princeton out of my own pride, so that I can stick out my chest and say I'm better than all of my peers, so that when I go to our class reunion 10 years from now, I can walk around with my Princeton shirt and like those are wrong motives to make those decisions and you have to be able to surrender that and be honest with the Lord.
Speaker 1: Ok, that is, surrender your motives and be honest with the Lord.
Speaker 1: Okay, that is, surrender your motives and be honest with it.
Speaker 1: Okay, step number five With all the options that are left, there is a key moment Okay, as you've sorted and deciphered your heart, where you say to God all right, god, like with those.
Speaker 1: Uh, let's go back to the three job offers that I had coming out of A&M.
Speaker 1: Okay, one was down a little because it was uh, uh in Fort Worth.
Speaker 1: Okay, of the two that were in Dallas, one paid a decent amount higher, about $7,000.
Speaker 1: A starting salary is kind of a lot when you're a young kid coming out, so it was like 40 and 47.
Speaker 1: Okay, or my engineer and this is back in the day, right, an engineer coming out of school, all right, and so those two were, those two were in Dallas, and but outside of that, I mean there are a handful of reasons of why this one's a little better than this and that sort of thing.
Speaker 1: All right, but, and all those factors are on the table.
Speaker 1: But then there's a moment where I get alone to the Lord.
Speaker 1: I've checked all of my own motives.
Speaker 1: If there's anything in me, god, show me, search me, see if there's any wicked way.
Speaker 1: I don't want to chase something for the wrong reasons.
Speaker 1: But then I get to this moment.
Speaker 1: That is where you put your yes on the table and you say you know what, lord, if you call me to any of these three jobs or something else, I will go.
Speaker 1: I'll go, I'll do it If you want to lead me.
Speaker 1: Your will is greater than the fact that one of the jobs is in Fort Worth and your will is greater than one of the jobs pays a decent chunk less than the other.
Speaker 1: Your will is greater than that and to put your genuine surrender on the table and say all right, god, if you'll lead me, I'll go wherever you want Now, with that, you then have to ask the question what are you looking for next?
Speaker 1: What are you looking for the Lord to do next?
Speaker 1: Ok, it's really nice when God shuts doors in your face.
Speaker 1: Those are actually really good moments.
Speaker 1: Ok, they don't feel good at the time, but they actually really good moments.
Speaker 1: Okay, they don't feel good at the time, but they are really good moments.
Speaker 1: So there was a time when I was a youth pastor it was my first ministry job after the Lord had called me into ministry and I was looking to take the step to become a senior pastor and there was a church in Austin that I was certain that door was opening and I was taking that position.
Speaker 1: In fact, uh, they brought us down to Austin to, uh, look at houses.
Speaker 1: Okay, so when you get that far in a job process, that's, that's pretty good.
Speaker 1: They're telling you yes, we want you to come and look at houses.
Speaker 1: So we go down, we look at houses, we have the weekend with them.
Speaker 1: They called me the next week and said, uh, started to give me a number of handful of excellent explanations that were really pretty vague, but at the end of that conversation they just said I'm sorry, it's not going to work out, and that door just wham, shut in our face.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's nice when that happens.
Speaker 1: Okay, remember when we were talking earlier and I said, oh my gosh, there's three paths, and this one leads to the promised land.
Speaker 1: And what's behind door number two and three is why you lost at life.
Speaker 1: Listen to me.
Speaker 1: Your heavenly father is not playing games with your life like you're in a game show.
Speaker 1: Ok, hear me.
Speaker 1: Many options that you go down in his mind converge and lead to the same path.
Speaker 1: If he wants to shut a door in your life, he will.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's.
Speaker 1: It's different if you're Jonah and you're like oh, no, god, I heard you say that I'm just doing something else.
Speaker 1: All right, that's a different story.
Speaker 1: If you are listening to the Lord and you are like God could could you help me figure this out?
Speaker 1: And you don't sense the Lord open a door or shut one in your face, okay, then, what are you looking for?
Speaker 1: This is what you're looking for, okay?
Speaker 1: Uh, there's a passage in Philippians, chapter four.
Speaker 1: It says that if you give to the Lord your anxiety, and when you do it, you, you praise him.
Speaker 1: At the same time, if you give thanksgiving, you say you know what God, you are good to me, you are with me.
Speaker 1: His promise, his portion of what he will do back for you, is he will give you a peace and a confidence by the spirit of God in your heart and mind to help you figure out the path.
Speaker 1: That is his promise.
Speaker 1: So what you are seeking when you have to make a major life decision is is God giving me a peace about what to do?
Speaker 1: I've used my brain, I've sought wise counsel.
Speaker 1: Right, I studied his word.
Speaker 1: I've been praying all along.
Speaker 1: I've surrendered my motives.
Speaker 1: Okay, I've put my yes on the table.
Speaker 1: God, I will go anywhere you want me to go.
Speaker 1: It's up to you.
Speaker 1: Now I need a sense from you.
Speaker 1: He will give you a peace.
Speaker 1: So those three jobs, me coming out of school um, I was down on the Fort Worth one.
Speaker 1: There were two in Dallas.
Speaker 1: This one paid considerably more.
Speaker 1: I put my yes on the table and I don't know how else to tell you besides, in prayer time I just began to get a sense, a confidence of peace, that that God wanted me to take the less paying engineering job in Dallas and it was with a pretty small company, it.
Speaker 1: It wasn't as shiny, it didn't look as good as wasn't as shiny, it didn't look as good as as this company here that paid $7,000 more and was in a nice big building, all that stuff.
Speaker 1: He wanted me to take this job.
Speaker 1: I don't know what else to tell you besides he, he, he gave me a piece in that regard.
Speaker 1: Fast forward in my life, what I didn't know at the time was a year, year and a half, into being an engineer there, the Lord would call me into ministry.
Speaker 1: Complete change in career paths.
Speaker 1: That smaller engineering firm turned out to be absolutely incredible and perfect for that change of trajectory of what the Lord was doing in my life.
Speaker 1: And uh, had I been at a bigger firm and like so I told them I was going, uh, that the Lord had called me into ministry and he helped me transition for six months and all of that, all of that stuff.
Speaker 1: Versus if I had been in a bigger firm, he'd have said here's your slip, here's your notice, adios.
Speaker 1: So I can look back now and see that the Lord had reasons for why he was telling me to take this job and not this job.
Speaker 1: And the only way I got there was I put my yes on the table and I said, lord, I, I'm going to use my brain, I'm going to take this job unless you tell me otherwise.
Speaker 1: Okay, you, you can speak frankly to the Lord.
Speaker 1: You can say, god, I'm going to walk through that door unless you stop me.
Speaker 1: All right, god, here I go.
Speaker 1: That's fine, guys.
Speaker 1: And if he doesn't stop you, I want you to have a confidence, because you're surrendered, right?
Speaker 1: Is he your heavenly father?
Speaker 1: Okay, then, I want you to have a confidence.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's fine, you can go through that door.
Speaker 1: So I know a lot of you are freshmen, you're in high school, you're, you're looking at.
Speaker 1: All right, let's apply this to what college to take or what course path to take.
Speaker 1: Okay, can I give you, can I give you an assurance One?
Speaker 1: I I know that they want you to have it figured out when you're, uh, 15, 14, going into right, and you're like, oh goodness, yeah, I guess I got to know that Guess what you don't and there's way more flexibility ahead than than what you think.
Speaker 1: Okay, they're like hey, choose these five tracks and and you're off.
Speaker 1: And if you happen to be like the 10% that picks that track, that just works out for what they're going to do the rest of their life like, praise the Lord, good for you.
Speaker 1: But 90% of the people are going to be wandering around figuring things out, and that's okay.
Speaker 1: I stand before you, a pastor.
Speaker 1: You know what I got called to be a pastor?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was 24.
Speaker 1: I've got an engineering degree that I don't use.
Speaker 1: Okay, the Lord has lots of ways of weaving our path to help us figure and sort through.
Speaker 1: And and, by the way, he used this engineering degree in awesome ways to provide for me whenever I was in seminary as working part-time and make a lot more money, part-time engineer, getting through seminary and those sorts of things.
Speaker 1: But God knew all of that.
Speaker 1: So I know we like to have things planned out, and a lot of you.
Speaker 1: The Lord is stretching you with control.
Speaker 1: Okay, and that's okay, because when there's a little mix up in life and when things get kind of thrown in the air and you feel out of control, it forces you to press into the Lord like you wouldn't at any other time, and that's actually good for you.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right.
Speaker 1: Reply back Questions.
Speaker 1: Other scenarios that you want to hear me talk about Chase, would you ever say that there could be a scenario where there's like two doors open and God's saying do either one.
Speaker 1: Yes, no, 100%.
Speaker 1: So great follow-up question.
Speaker 1: He said sometimes does it not matter which door you choose?
Speaker 1: Hear me, yes, he's exactly right.
Speaker 1: Sometimes God is literally saying choose either door, I don't care, because, in his mind, right, if you, if you're looking at the path, okay, if God wants to get you to here and there's this path, this path, this path, okay, if God wants to get you to here and there's this path, this path, this path, what God knows is that this path actually links up right there and it's all the same.
Speaker 1: And he's like, yeah, I don't care If you've surrendered, right Again, if you're Jonah and you're like, oh, I heard the Lord and no, I'm going anyways, right, but if you're like God, would you lead me, could you?
Speaker 1: Could I hear from you?
Speaker 1: Ok, I'm not sensing either way, I would absolutely tell you.
Speaker 1: Then do what you want to do.
Speaker 1: And that's why I said tell God.
Speaker 1: All right, god, I'm going to go down this path unless you tell me otherwise.
Speaker 1: Yeah, great, do it.
Speaker 1: Good question Others I'm an adult now so my parents don't make my decisions anymore, but as a high schooler, I'd be curious your commentary on.
Speaker 1: You know, mom and dad think I need to go down this path and I'm 15 and I can't necessarily just say, no, you're wrong, I'm going to go do this other path, right.
Speaker 1: So what's the balance?
Speaker 1: Let's say, hypothetically, 15 year old feels incredibly convicted on their path.
Speaker 1: What's the balance of mom and dad versus what I think is maybe more correct?
Speaker 1: Yeah, what a great question.
Speaker 1: Does anyone identify with that?
Speaker 1: How to balance between mom and dad?
Speaker 1: All right, so everyone's parental situation is different, okay, and so there's a lot of nuance in there.
Speaker 1: That's where a lot of that wise counsel and someone that's close to the situation that can help you walk through, and how to navigate it.
Speaker 1: Okay, one, as you grow and mature, one of the things, one of the muscles that you really need to develop, is the ability to communicate, and to communicate clearly.
Speaker 1: Most of your parents will be rather reasonable Okay, if you can communicate.
Speaker 1: Okay, and if they press you, then a lot of times they they just want you to to be able to think well and not just give a surface level answer All right.
Speaker 1: So you choosing your career path based on the fact that your buddy is also taking that class right, what are your parents going to do?
Speaker 1: They're going to roll their eyes.
Speaker 1: They're going to be like, come on, you just want to goof off in that class because your buddy's in that class.
Speaker 1: I can't take you seriously.
Speaker 1: But if you begin to articulate deeper issues, your parents overwhelmingly want to see you succeed and you need to be able to communicate.
Speaker 1: And maybe you can't do that initially, but a good mentor, a good person that's a few steps in front of you that can help you talk about that.
Speaker 1: Go to your parents with good, honest communication.
Speaker 1: That would honestly solve about 80% of the issues there.
Speaker 1: There are complex situations with complex parents and all my parents are divorced and my stepdad's a jerk and a lot of that stuff.
Speaker 1: Like I, like I get it and, whether you know it or not, uh, high school is really short.
Speaker 1: High school is really short.
Speaker 1: I know you think it's an eternity and you're like, oh my gosh, it's so hard to be compliant when I'm underneath their house.
Speaker 1: In the perspective of life.
Speaker 1: High school really is short.
Speaker 1: You can do a lot of things for a short period of time that curb what you want to do, because in reality you're not an adult, you don't know the weight of what it means to hold a job and pay all your own bills and a lot of that stuff.
Speaker 1: So you're in the embryonic chamber, you're developing.
Speaker 1: You're in the embryonic chamber, you're developing.
Speaker 1: So one overwhelmingly.
Speaker 1: If you learn to communicate clearly with your parents, that will go a long way.
Speaker 1: Seek a mentor's help in being able to develop that, and then it's going to get into kind of situational ethics with different ones.
Speaker 1: Does that help?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I wish I had heard that, because my parents were divorced and instead I closed off and separated from both.
Speaker 1: I think I turned out fine, but it would have been nice to be able to go to people that I am around daily and run that circle in an appropriate way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, see, one of the things that you don't realize yeah, see, one of the things that you don't realize especially if you come from a broken home or you know there's some complexity with your parents is hear me, your parents actually want what is best for you, even if the relationship is a little strained and confusing.
Speaker 1: Okay, and I know you don't always feel that I'm just telling you from a parent, and I deal with a lot of other parents and a lot of other adults.
Speaker 1: They want what's best for you.
Speaker 1: By the way, just on behalf of all parents.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they're in over their head as well, over their head as well.
Speaker 1: And see, I had, I had this vision of of my dad and mom when I was a teenager, that like, oh man, when you become an adult, like life just makes sense, like life is like easy for adults.
Speaker 1: Here I am this kid and I don't know all that much stuff.
Speaker 1: But I look, oh, he must know everything.
Speaker 1: And then there's this odd thing that occurs as you get older and older.
Speaker 1: You begin to ask yourself am I an adult yet?
Speaker 1: And inside you say I don't really feel like an adult because I certainly don't have all of those questions answered that I thought I would have.
Speaker 1: But you look down and you're like dude, you've got three kids and a job and a mortgage.
Speaker 1: You better be an adult by now.
Speaker 1: But inside I'm like I don't really feel like an adult.
Speaker 1: I'm like running around with short shorts and a tank top on stage, like I don't know that I'm an adult yet All I'm saying is the reality is, give your parents a little slack, because what you don't know is they actually are dealing with the complexities of life also.
Speaker 1: But if you communicate with them, so, so, like Jacob, right.
Speaker 1: So like in Jacob's.
Speaker 1: In Jacob's case, right, his parents had gone through a divorce.
Speaker 1: They, they, they're.
Speaker 1: No one ever gets married thinking they they're going to get divorced.
Speaker 1: Right, the reason you get married is because you want to be married for life.
Speaker 1: But it broke up, it got ugly.
Speaker 1: They have like, oh, how do we relate to each other?
Speaker 1: And here's Jacob, and he's like I'm not going to talk to them about it.
Speaker 1: And and meanwhile, like they've got their own mess and they're trying to do the best that they can.
Speaker 1: Uh, but um, but their teenage son won't talk to him and and he's closed down.
Speaker 1: And they're like all all he wants to do is hang out with his friends.
Speaker 1: He'll never talk to us about any of these important issues.
Speaker 1: He doesn't think he can talk to them.
Speaker 1: So listen, please hear me, if you talk to adults again, find a good mentor and someone that would encourage you, communicate well to your parents.
Speaker 1: It'll actually go a really long way.
Speaker 1: Other questions scenarios Tony, what does the scripture tell us about God's response when, in our ignorance, we start down the wrong path?
Speaker 1: Yeah, great question.
Speaker 1: What if you're going down the wrong path?
Speaker 1: Okay, I think Scripture tells you plainly in Hebrews, chapter 12, that God will discipline you.
Speaker 1: If you are God's, he will discipline you.
Speaker 1: Okay, now that passage is specifically talking about when you're sinning.
Speaker 1: So if we say wrong path in terms of sinning, okay, the Lord will discipline you.
Speaker 1: That's what he preached about this morning in terms of Jonah.
Speaker 1: Hear me, that is a good, good thing, like a really good thing.
Speaker 1: If I could put this into your soul right now.
Speaker 1: Listen, if someone doesn't discipline you, if someone looks at you and says, I don't care what you do, that's actually the wrath of God.
Speaker 1: Okay, remember when he said that kids going and running in the street what is the coldest thing that could be done at that time To be like, yeah, I don't care what you do, I get your three go run and play in the street, I don't care.
Speaker 1: To say I don't care is it's honestly.
Speaker 1: That's the wrath of God.
Speaker 1: But Hebrews 12 says that God disciplines each of his sons and daughters as his own, okay and so.
Speaker 1: So discipline in that sense is usually I mean, think of it like a spanking.
Speaker 1: It's like, oh my gosh, it gets your attention.
Speaker 1: Okay, the Lord will do that, especially in your sin, but also even if you're choosing, even if you're choosing a path and you're like, oh my gosh, I missed it.
Speaker 1: Okay, the Lord will.
Speaker 1: The Lord is kind and good, he will redirect.
Speaker 1: Lord is kind and good, he will redirect.
Speaker 1: He will, he will bring you back and accomplish all that he desires with with your life.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you a super sad story.
Speaker 1: Um, a guy at my last church his name is Jim Matlock, uh, he's like 85.
Speaker 1: Okay, and he comes up to me, wants to meet me in my office after one of the services and meets me in my office.
Speaker 1: And he comes up to me, wants to meet me in my office after one of the services and meets me in my office, and he comes in and here's what he says to me he said God called me to be a preacher whenever I was 20, and I kind of ran from that, of ran from that and I think I've missed God's call on my entire life.
Speaker 1: Here he is 85, right, no-transcript.
Speaker 1: All right, how would you respond to him?
Speaker 1: He's in my office.
Speaker 1: He's 85.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just.
Speaker 1: Uh, I think I think the picture of God from the scripture is is so so much more clear than that.
Speaker 1: That is, look, man, if he, if he threw Jonah into a whale to get, threw Jonah into a whale to get his attention, all right, and as you were wrestling with God's calling upon your life, listen to me, it's not like God abandoned you for 60 years and was like he's on the wrong path.
Speaker 1: Sucks for him.
Speaker 1: Hope he figures it out and gets on the right path.
Speaker 1: Like no, this is your heavenly father.
Speaker 1: It's not just leaving you to the wolves.
Speaker 1: Okay, um, so that would be my reply.
Speaker 1: He's, he is, and and that's what I, that's what I hope to relieve a little bit when you're like, oh my gosh, there's five paths or there's five colleges.
Speaker 1: How do I choose the right one?
Speaker 1: A lot of times the reality is God is either saying there's no right one I'm with you all of these, so chill out or there's some exit ramps along the way that God intends that he will even use that mistake.
Speaker 1: So you know, people go one semester to a college.
Speaker 1: They're like that was not for me.
Speaker 1: They transfer to another one.
Speaker 1: I absolutely think that would be 100% in the Lord's will to be like, yeah, and I was teaching you through that that you could trust me even in the exit.
Speaker 1: I'm going to close with this One of my favorite stories.
Speaker 1: I think I'm getting the reference right in like second Corinthians chapter.
Speaker 1: It's two, three or four If I give a broad enough reference, you'll you'll know it's for certain.
Speaker 1: All right, paul is Paul is he's writing to the Corinthians, but he's telling them about his own travels and he says I felt God calling me to go to Troas, okay, to preach the gospel.
Speaker 1: And Paul said a door was opened up for me and I went.
Speaker 1: Now you got to remember, in the ancient world, travel took a long time, right, it took like three months to do anything.
Speaker 1: And so, uh, you, you got to think this is, this is like a six month journey of planning and being like, yes, the Lord opened a door, I'm supposed to go to Troas, all right.
Speaker 1: So he says it in one sentence.
Speaker 1: He's like the Lord opened a door to go preach the gospel to Troas, he says.
Speaker 1: And then I got there and my spirit was unsettled because I couldn't find Titus.
Speaker 1: I don't know what the situation was.
Speaker 1: I guess he thought he knew Titus.
Speaker 1: His good buddy, his apprentice, was there and like they were going to go around together, he said I couldn't find Titus.
Speaker 1: And so you got to understand.
Speaker 1: It's like here's Paul wandering around the city like where's Titus?
Speaker 1: Ok, I'm here.
Speaker 1: So that probably takes a week.
Speaker 1: He's trying to find Titus.
Speaker 1: Then he's praying about.
Speaker 1: He says, and at the end of that I was unsettled so I just moved on to Macedonia.
Speaker 1: Now pause for a second here.
Speaker 1: You know the apostle Paul saw the resurrected Lord on the road to Damascus.
Speaker 1: He healed people with his shadow, raised someone from the dead.
Speaker 1: You guys know that story.
Speaker 1: That's a great story.
Speaker 1: Paul was preaching.
Speaker 1: It was late in the night.
Speaker 1: He kept going on and on and on.
Speaker 1: This little kid falls out of the second story because Paul had rocked him to sleep, falls down dead.
Speaker 1: Paul comes down, lays on top of him, resurrects him.
Speaker 1: And then what does Paul do after that?
Speaker 1: Goes right back to preaching.
Speaker 1: You got to love that guy, all right.
Speaker 1: So Paul, back in Troas, raise someone from the dead.
Speaker 1: And yet in this account he tells you I felt the Lord opened a door for me to go and preach the gospel.
Speaker 1: But when I got there, my spirit was unsettled.
Speaker 1: And then I moved on and I'm like hallelujah, you know what?
Speaker 1: There's a guy who at times in life looks like he's just running around figuring it out, like I think God wants me here now.
Speaker 1: All right, well, I'm going to put my hand to the plow.
Speaker 1: No, this isn't where God wants me, and he moves me, I just.
Speaker 1: I point that out because there's so much flexibility, because the Lord is the one who's with you all the time.
Speaker 1: In fact, he ends that section Uh, second Corinthians four is what I'm going with.
Speaker 1: He ends that sections with and praise be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ Jesus.
Speaker 1: Okay, in other words and this is my close God is with you.
Speaker 1: Okay, I've given you some practical steps how to use your brain, how to pray about it, how to seek some wise counsel, but at the end of the day, you get God himself.
Speaker 1: There are so many times when we want God to give us a roadmap.
Speaker 1: Anybody want a roadmap for life.
Speaker 1: You know, I actually prayed for this, I fasted for this coming out of college.
Speaker 1: Okay, I wanted a roadmap for my life saying God what does it look like?
Speaker 1: And then one day I was at my parents' house and God actually replied Okay, you want to know what he said?
Speaker 1: I don't have to give you one, you just follow me, follow my word, I promise you.
Speaker 1: That's what the Holy Spirit of God said to me.
Speaker 1: He said I don't have to give you a roadmap, I don't got to tell you what I'm going to do.
Speaker 1: Right, and as you can see, like I was an engineer and then I was a youth pastor, the Lord's moved me around and that's what he will do to you.
Speaker 1: Okay, have confidence in that, because in the end of the day, what you get is God himself.
Speaker 1: All right, let's pray, then we're done.
Speaker 1: Otherwise, I'll keep going on and on and you will fall dead.
Speaker 1: Heavenly father, we thank you for this afternoon.
Speaker 1: I pray right now, in Jesus name, that you would give these students a confidence that your spirit is with them and that, yes, they can go through these practical steps and God hear from you in that, that you will give them a peace and guidance, but more than anything, god, that they would have a confidence that you are going to be with them through the process.
Speaker 1: Right, that they can't screw it up that by seeking you, you will reveal yourself to them and you give flexibility and choice and freedom and you delight in that and help them to walk in that freedom.
Speaker 1: In Jesus name, we pray Amen.