Ep 36: Embracing the Phoenix Within
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Sam Horton: Today I want to dive into something I know many of you will resonate with, the power of embracing your inner phoenix.
We all have those moments in life, the ones that shake us to our core, where everything feels like it's crumbling and falling apart around us. And if you're anything like me, you might've found yourself asking, Who even am I now? And where do I go from here? If you're in a season of transition, loss or reinvention, I see you, I feel you, I've been there and this episode is for you.
So settle in and let's talk about what it means to rise from the ashes and reclaim your power. Here's the hard truth. Something has to die before something new can be born. And that might sound a bit dramatic, but it's actually a [00:01:00] natural and necessary part of life. Endings, whether they're physical, emotional, spiritual, or mental, they aren't just losses, they're invitations, uh, for renewal. The question I want you to sit with today is what needs to die before you can do, be, or have what you truly desire?
I know this truth intimately because I've lived it.
For years, I thrived in the business world and from the outside, it looked really peachy. You know, I had success, security and stability. But inside I felt disconnected, burnt out, and, unfulfilled.
despite all of my successes and achievements, I always felt like a bit of a round peg in a square hole. I was living a life that no longer fit me, and my soul was whispering, that it was time to let go.
The fear of [00:02:00] leaving behind that identity, my career and everything that I'd built was really overwhelming. And it took me years to actually embrace it and, to finally let go. But I don't believe it has to be like that for everyone.I just didn't have the guidance and the information back then.
And I really resisted it because letting go isn't easy, you know, especially when the thing we need to release is something we once worked so hard for, and something we really fought to be good at and to be successful at. But evolution is non negotiable. Eventually I had to release my grip on my career.
I'd spent almost 20 years building it. It wasn't just about quitting a job, it was about letting an entire version of myself die, and it was really terrifying.
it was messy and yet it was the beginning of something completely new and actually the discovery of what I believe, you know, is [00:03:00] my true purpose. The phoenix is one of my favourite metaphors for this type of transformation. You know, when it bursts into flames, it's not an end. It's a necessary destruction to make space for the new.and I know you've probably felt this too. Maybe you've held on to relationships, jobs, identities. Or beliefs long past their expiration date.
Simply because the unknown felt scarier than staying put.even if it went against your personal truth. And here's the thing, not everything is meant to last forever. Some things are meant to be chapters, not the whole book.
And when we cling to what's no longer aligned, we only delay the inevitable. And we actually just draw out the pain of it, and make it more challenging for ourselves. So, I want you to ask yourself, you know, what am I afraid to release? And what is waiting to be born in its place? There are actually two key [00:04:00] universal laws that support, this, you know, endings and beginnings part of the transformation journey. First one is the law of evolution. So this is all about the fact that growth is inevitable. Everything in nature evolves, you know, we only have to look to nature to sort of see it and play out, and we're no different.
Holding on to something that no longer fits is like trying to keep a butterfly in its cocoon. The longer we resist the change, you know, the more we suffer. And the second one is the law of intention. What we focus on expands. If we keep replaying old narratives and gripping onto outdated identities, we block new opportunities, but when we set, you know, clear intentional energy towards, you know, a new North star and towards our transformation, we can create space for what we truly desire.
When I left my professional career, I wasn't just stepping into [00:05:00] an abyss, I was making a conscious commitment to follow creativity, to trust my intuition and to align my life with my soul's calling. And that intention became my guide through all the uncertainty.
The call to grow, to evolve and to set an intention for a new North Star really guided my soul. If you'd like to learn a bit more about Spiritual Laws, I do have a powerful Spiritual Laws audio toolkit. to see that you just head to samhorton.co/laws Now, letting go isn't just a one size fits all process. It happens on different levels. You know, the physical, the mental, the emotional and the spiritual.
And recognizing where we're holding on can help us to release with a bit more intention. So we can have a look at each of these in a bit more detail. So first of all, physically letting go. This is probably the most tangible [00:06:00] and immediate form of release. You know, shedding possessions, environments or physical habits that no longer align with who you're becoming. Like decluttering your home is a good example.
Letting go of objects, you know, that are tied to past versions of yourself, clothing that no longer fits, gifts from an ex partner, paperwork from an old job, you know, or things that you've been carrying around for years that you don't need anymore, even broken things that you were going to fix but years later you still haven't gotten around to it,Toys and clothes that your kid's outgrown.
and the list just goes on.also, you know, changing your environment. So it could be extremes like moving home or changing cities or countries. Or simpler tasks, you know, like tidying your space or redesigning your space to reflect your new energy and the way that you're using that space. It could also be breaking physical unhealthy habits.
You know, like smoking, or excessive [00:07:00] drinking, or bad food patterns that really drain your vitalityAnd stop you from being your best self. When I left my professional career, one of my first actions was actually physically clearing out my old office wardrobe.
those clothes carried an identity that no longer fit with me and it just didn't feel right to keep wearing them. So, you know, Those clothes were tied to an expectation, or, and an identity rather than kind of soul alignment. So releasing them was really important.
It was the first step in kind of stepping into the creative life I knew it was meant for. and it did actually take a bit of time to figure out what I was actually going to wear as this new person, but, yeah, getting rid of the old stuff was really important.
So I want you to ask yourself, what physical things in your environment are keeping you tied to a past chapter? And what could you release today?
so next, [00:08:00] mentally letting go. So this involves shifting thought patterns, limiting beliefs and ingrained mindsets that keep you feeling trapped. It could be releasing perfectionism, you know, letting go of the belief that you must be perfect to be worthy, or taking the pressure off yourself to be any further ahead than where you are right now.
stopping comparing yourself to others and focusing on your own goals and progress. It could be letting go of overthinking, you know, learning to trust yourself more and stopping the obsession over every detail before taking action. Or changing your narrative, you know, shifting from I'm not good enough to, you know, I'm constantly evolving and growing and being kinder to yourself.
When I transitioned from You know, the CFO to the artist. One of my biggest mental blocks was the belief that [00:09:00] I, you know, I'd invested so much time and effort and money into my identity as a finance and business professional that I didn't even really know who I was without it. And I had to rewrite my inner definition of how the world saw me.
And even how I saw myself, you know, from the numbers and business savvy person to the creative free spirit who was taking huge risks and stepping into the unknown. And once I let go of that mental narrative, I was able to relax a bit more into a version of myself that felt more natural and flowed much easier.
You know, what limiting thought patterns are keeping you small and what beliefs need to die for your new reality to emerge? The next one is emotionally letting go. So this is all about, you know, unresolved emotions like grief, resentment, guilt, fear, you know, that can keep us really trapped in our old stories.[00:10:00]
And when we learn how to emotionally release that stuff, it really allows us to free ourselves from past wounds and create space for more joy.you know, this could be forgiveness, you know, letting go of anger towards someone who's hurt you, not for them, but for you and for your own peace, you know, could be releasing old identities.
So mourning a past version of yourself that, you know, you really loved at one point in time and that really helped you so that you can embrace who you're actually becoming.and obviously things like allowing grief to move through you. You know, it's not about shoving things down and ignoring things, but it's actually about processing and allowing things to flow through you.
So understanding that, you know, that Loss and grieving and, you know, whether it's of relationships, dreams or life chapters, you know, or people or, in the physical form, it's all a natural part of our evolution [00:11:00] and our growth as humans. So, yeah, to grieve is completely natural.
I struggled with guilt and shame and I definitely grieved, you know, once I'd realised that my marriage was beyond repair. And even though the marriage itself was toxic and not serving anyone, I felt like I'd failed, you know, despite knowing deep down that it was the right thing to do.
And, you know, I've spoken about this quite a bit before, but my art practice really helped me to process those emotions and feelings and to heal enough so that I could muster the courage to follow through, you know, let the marriage go and eventually feel immense gratitude for that chapter without being weighed down by it.
You know, I want you to ask yourself, you know, what emotions are you holding onto that may be keeping you from fully stepping into your future? And then we have spiritually letting go. So this is all about surrender, you know, releasing control, trusting the process and [00:12:00] embracing, divine timing and the unknown. and for you this might mean, you know, just releasing the need to control everything. You know, I was a complete control freak for a long time in my life, you know, and learning to trust that life is unfolding in divine timing is, you know, still something that I have to really work on to this day.
It could be letting go of fear of the unknown. You know, we carry these fears around with us that stop us from taking action. when really, you know, leaning into faith and trust, you know, is really the only way we can move forward sometimes in these really, big moments.
And, you know, spiritually letting go can also be about realigning with your inner wisdom. So, you know, releasing all these external expectations, society's expectations, friends, parents, husbands, wives, whatever, and tuning into, you know, your soul's guidance and, you know, the [00:13:00] inner wisdom you hold within you.
it's a really powerful, moment of realization when you realize that you actually have everything you need. You just need to tap into it, and let it guide you. When I took the leap into, you know, a creative path, I had no guarantees.I still don't, but I, and I had to let go of certainty and embrace trust. But I tell you what, it feels so much better to set an intention for the future that's aligned with your soul than to hang on through fear of the unknown.
And had I waited until I had everything figured out and my path was clear and safe, I would still be stuck there in a life that wasn't meant for me. And let's be honest, I may never have figured it out if I'd stayed in that place, if I hadn't let go and taken a leap of faith. So I want you to ask yourself, you know, where are you resisting change
because it feels a bit uncertain and scary? And what might happen if [00:14:00] you trusted the unknown is leading you somewhere beautiful?
so sometimes when we're facing, you know, these, these moments of, letting go, so that we can welcome in the new, it can be, you know, really overwhelming and often, you know, it's easier said than done, right? so if you are navigating a period of transition, I do have a few spiritual and creative tools that I'll mention here, that really can help support your transformation, um, and help you embrace your inner phoenix. So the first one is, um, really just journaling and reflection, you know, this inner soul led inquiry is something I'm really passionate about.
And it's only when we intentionally have a conversation with our inner world and our soul that we're, you know, really able to get the answers, that we need to hear. So write down what you need to let go of, you know, journal about it, brainstorm it, you know, and let your pen be a tool [00:15:00] for your surrender and see what comes out.
The next suggestion I have is artistic expression, you know, do something creative, paint, draw, You know, create something that's symbolic, you know, of what you need to release in your life. It doesn't have to be Drawing an actual thing. It can just be playing with art materials and doing something really abstract You just don't know what's going to come out until you sit down and try it And you might be really surprised about what you can express when you engage in a conversation with your soul without using logic or words you can also try some specific exercises, in my creative awakening workbook, which is specifically designed to help you let go, step into the unknown and set powerful future intentions.
So you can have a look at that at samhorton.co/workbook. Another suggestion I have is, rituals and ceremonies, you know, simple things like, you know, [00:16:00] burning a letter, Lighting a candle, you know, even planting something, you know, as a tangible act of release and renewal. And these powerful rituals can feel really cathartic, symbolic, and they can be really tangible, you know, and help you kind of shift your energy.
Another one is meditation and visualization. So, you know, imagine you are. a phoenix rising from the ashes, you know, in a meditation or, try a visualization for specifically for surrender and letting go. Movement and dance is also really powerful, you know, embody, sort of your own transformation, by moving, you know, through it physically, let your feelings and emotions, you know, move through you and then just sort of see how that makes you feel afterwards. But ultimately you need to find the practice that speaks to you and let it guide your process.
You know, lean on the things [00:17:00] that really, um, feel good to you
So the thing that I'd really love you to take away from today's episode is that endings are not failures. You know, they're declarations of your commitment to growth. Um, when we release, we don't lose, we make space for something even greater. So I want to leave you, um, with the question we started with, which is what needs to die before you can do, be, or have what you truly want.
Sit with it, journal on it. Trust in the cycle of death and rebirth because just like the phoenix, you are meant to rise. Thank you so much for tuning in today. If this episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Send me a message, share it with a friend who might need this reminder or let's continue the conversation inside
the soul led creative community. Until next time, keep creating, keep evolving, and keep trusting in your beautiful, ever unfolding [00:18:00] journey. Take care.
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